1. His perfect height. Yes, perfect. Gives a sense of equality and feet on the ground.
2. His voice. First, unmistakable, special, soft, kind of nasal, or not, I don’t know. Second, his intonation, which I have no way to describe, only know how it makes me feel. Third, my native language is not English, so yes, fuck it, his accent and the fact it’s not Spanish.
3. His hair, swoop or no swoop, although I like the swoop. Someone explain, why does everyone say his hair is blond? Is it? When it’s not greyish I see it brown. My hair is black as my conscience, and blond hair for me is yellow lol.
4. His swagger, oh, he has swagger. Swoop and swagger. I’m going back to bed.
5. I’m up. The way he crosses his leg, and touches it, lol. OK, bed again.
6. His eyes, it’s not only the color, it’s his stare, su mirada. Cliché yeah, but I swear I can see his soul and I don’t fucking believe in any of that.
7. Well, obviously everything his mouth does, eating, smiling, licking, talking, swearing, kissing, saying sexy things while a toothbrush is inside and singing take on me, oh and purring. Everything I can’t and never will see his mouth do.
8. Obviamente, his style, his socks, his earphones, headphones or whatever. The music inside them, well, some of it.
9. His oh my fucking figurative god, send me to figurative hell and lock me in it, hips. His delicious and delicious and delicious (deleting English vocabulary) hips. And how they look in the clothes he wears. No, por favor, alguien máteme.
10. His hands, I don’t know, his hands are fucking figurative heaven, I honestly don’t know what else to say, they’re just gorgeous hands.
11. Well, extra obviously, his disrespectfully magnificent acting skills. Give him any role, any role. And I’m just in Martin Freeman 101. I have tons of things to watch.
12. His damn brain and all the language that comes out of it, I know some find his swearing endearing, the sass and all, I do too, but, really, he’s just outsmarting us, he’s just telling us our ordinary brains and attitude towards the world are way simplistic. Get your act together, go read some books, talk to interesting people, listen to some good music, and then come back, if you dare. God, I love the bastard.
13. Oh I like his neck. Fffffuck.
14. Chubby Martin, slim Martin. Soft muscles Martin, fit Martin. All Martin.
15. His new film Y tu papi también, directed by @geek-royalty featuring Diego Luna and Gael García Bernal.
16. I could go on, but my stomach needs breakfast.
17. Thanks to @unexplored-girl for pointing this out. Something only a Spanish speaking girl would understand: the way he says cafecito (once I understood that’s what he was saying). Fucking Saint of coffee lands, that was soooooo sexy.