don' climb

“Ball pythons don’t climb! They live in holes in termite mounds!”

“Ball pythons don’t climb! They’re bad at it! It’s bad husbandry to let them climb!”……

Apparently they can levitate. Who knew.

Broken Secrets - Barry Allen x Reader

Originally posted by time-remnants

Requested by bon-travail98   -  Barry x reader where he has to choose between saving the reader’s life or Iris’ and he chooses Iris at the last minute. Have it be something like the meta has them separated and there’s a bomb but they’re to far apart for even Barry to get to them both. oh and maybe have the reader live but not know why because she knows she’s not a meta, and she finds out it’s because she’s pregnant with Barry’s kid(s) and somehow their speed force is temporarily hers and her body acted on some instinct and ran her out of harms way. But she’s so upset with Barry that she keeps the fact that she’s alive a secret and eventually runs into someone… is this too much?? (At this time Barry’s the only speedster)

An unknown figure appeared on the screen, shadowed from view. “You have a choice, Mr. Allen.” Barry, Cisco, and Caitlin stared at the screen with wide eyes. “Which one do you love more?” Suddenly, two pictures of you and Iris appeared side by side on the screen. Both of you were tried up to a chair with a bomb strapped on the back. 

“Where is this coming from?” Barry demanded, his eyes wide with panic. Cisco started typing rapidly on the computer.

“I don’t know. It just took over the system.” Cisco spun around to try a different computer. “I can’t access the system.” 

“I can’t get in either,” Caitlin added, frowning at her own computer. 

“You have five minutes, Mr. Allen, before the bombs explode,” the figure sneered as a map appeared on the screen. Two red dots appeared on the map. One was in Mexico while the other was in Canada. “One or the other, Mr. Allen. You cannot save both.” With that, the figure disappeared from the screen leaving only the map.

Barry stared at the screen before glancing Cisco and Caitlin. “See if you can hack those bombs and slow them down.” He studied the screen, tortured as he glanced between you and Iris. He made a snap decision. “I’ll go after Iris first, so focus on stopping the bomb on (Y/N).”

“Wait, Barry,” Caitlin shouted, but Barry was already gone. 

Keep reading


Woman wey take her hand, pack her poo-poo comot di toilet of man wey she dey friend because “e no gree flush” enter trouble, after she go try collect di poo-poo back.

The woman wey dey learn gymnastics, just start to waka with Bristol student, Liam Smith, for di first time, when she take fear troway di poo-poo comot for window.  

Instead make di thing land for garden, di poo-poo come jam between two windows wey no dey open wide.

Di lady decide to carry her thing back; she use head enter the small space wey di poo-poo bin dey, but na so she come trap for there, and trouble start.

Mr Smith say im no get choice but to call fire service make dem help remove di girl, along with her poo-poo.

Now, im don dey try raise money to repair di windows wey break, so e write all di tori for inside one University of Bristol crowd funding page.

Mr Smith write say: “I go one Tinder (social media app) waka with di woman and we end up for di house wey l dey share. Di evening waka nice; we eat for one popular chicken restaurant, drink beer small, and then we end up for my house, where we continue to dey drink wine and watch movie.”

Im say di woman go im toilet and when she return, she begin dey shake, as she tell am wetin she do.

The toilet window dey open but another window dey block am, and na only one small gap dey separate dem.

Before Mr Smith fit run go look for hammer, di woman don climb with her head first. Na so she come jam, hook for there.

Im say “…after di fire brigade show, dem surprise with wetin dem see but dem organise themselves.”

The woman no get any wound, after di firemen pull am out, but di bathroom window don spoil finish.“

So far, Mr Smith don raise more than £1200 to repair im window.

Dis amount pass di original target of £200 wey im bin dey find, so im and di woman don agree to give some of di money to charities dem.

Di woman no wan come out, show face for media, but Mr Smith say im don meet her since di thing happen and ’‘we know no wetin fit happen for future.”

anonymous asked:

There's a Horse. It wanders around the school but you never see it unless it wants you to. It's got dark eyes that make your protections feel like useless trinkets, and a fine black coat like silk to the touch. No one talks about the Horse. It's best not to. If you see it, you just quietly compliment its coat and give it a gift (it prefers sugar, candy will do) and it'll vanish when you look away. It's still there, you just won't see it any more. Don't climb on its back, no matter what it says.

The Salty Tang of Blood (Sensations Running Hot)

Late night meetings with the Varia go something like this:

“You know, most people come up to my door, knock and say, ‘this person would like to meet with you.’ They don’t climb up to my window, pick the lock, and then carry me out over their shoulder like a bag of potatoes.”

And that’s even before the captured assassins out for his blood or the power plays come into it.


Read it on A03: link


“You know, most people come up to my door, knock and say, ‘this person would like to meet with you.’ They don’t climb up to my window, pick the lock, and then carry me out over their shoulder like a bag of potatoes.”

Squalo rolls his eyes. He knows the fuss Sawada puts up is cursory, simply because his tutor would most likely kill him if he didn’t make some kind of effort to save himself. Also because the Old Man still thinks the Varia and Sawada are at war, despite the fact that Xanxus and Sawada hashed their shit out a while back.

“I’m Varia, brat. I don’t take the easy method.”

“I’ll say. You could have saved yourself twenty-five minutes and a countless amount of energy and strain if you’d just walked to my door like everyone else.” He can feel Sawada’s glare against his spine. “Do you even remember that you’ve got a false heart now instead of the real one?”

He scowls, not that Sawada can see it. “Fuck off, brat. I don’t need your pity.”

Keep reading

Sweet Revenge

Request by anonymous: Can I have a Fred Weasley imagine where the reader gets pranked by the twins and plans to get them back. She succeeds and Fred falls for her. Love you!
Pairing: Fred Weasley/Reader
Warnings: none
Words: 727

Keep reading

Fat amy: okay chloe you just have to look at beca and pretend she’s chicago so we can finish this anniversary video of yours

Beca: do i really have to be a stand in for this?

Chloe: YES.

Beca: FINE. You’re buying me food after this

Chloe: okay shh

Fat amy: okay beca you have to pretend like you’re chicago cause we’re editing his face on yours

Beca: that’s a thing I wouldn’t want to see

Fat amy: and we’re rolling

Chloe while looking at beca as they stand behind a green screen room: Honey, this is my long way of saying i miss you, i don’t have to climb a mountain or swim an ocean to be with you,cause you’re always with me in my thoughts, my dreams My heart. You deserve more than I could possibly ever give you, but everything I have is yours.I love you.

Fat amy: okay cut, that’s it. Lemme just edit that up and i’ll send it to you

Chloe: thanks amy!i owe you big time

Fat amy asks to beca once chloe was gone: so how you holding up shawshank?

Beca: i love her and I cannot do anything about it.

Fat amy: well sometimes doing nothing is the hardest thing to do

Beca: where did you get that?

Fat amy: game of thrones

Beca: yeap, moment is definitely killed. let’s just go.

Creepypasta Headcanon

《Creepypasta x male teenager half demon half human headcanon》 When your ‘grounded’

•You hate it when slender or jack ‘grounds’ you

•Always retaliating with “Im a teenager” cuz u are?

•Now because your a demon it’s extremely difficult to actually keep you in one room

•You’ll literally try anything to escape; Digging your way out with your trusty spoon, bribing and blackmailing and don’t forget climbing out the window

•However your always devising new plans because slender and EJ are to familiar with your tricks

•You normally get Ben to sneak you out of the room because you always have an electronic devise in your room in exchange for something of course

•And that something is money so he can buy whatever

•However if EJ catches you he will literally carry you underneath his arm and take you back much to your dismay

•They do it rarely and will only keep you in a room for like 5 minutes, 1 minute in and you’ve already tried to climb out the window blackmail almost everyone and dig your way out twice

•4 minutes in and your getting desperate so you’ll try and attack EJ which never works

•5 minutes later you come out of the room thinking 'that wasn’t so bad’, fires everywhere jacks rocking back and forth in the courner, windows are smashed to peices and everyone keeps on falling into the dug out holes

Originally posted by bunn-prince

princess-hylian  asked:

That’s actually how Puce got the crack in his skull- he fell off of Egg lmao

Lol the tree story was a cleverly disguised ruse hidden behind a cleverly disguised ruse! The truth was far more embarrassing. Don’t climb eggs you guys

anonymous asked:


So 2 or 3 years ago I went to my “straight” girl crushes house(sort of my girlfriend at the time). We listened to music, watched some tv, and ate cotton candy. (This is when I got nervous) We were sitting on the couch together the TV was on only music was playing. I can’t remember what we talked about, but it ended up with us talking about the fact that I havent kissed her yet (nervousness intensifies). I shrug I tell her I don’t know. She climbs on top of me placing my hands at my side, at this point the back of my head is pushed so far into the couch I’m nervous af. She can tell I’m nervous too she laughs at me and she says that I should just do it and not be nervous. (my heart is literally outside of my chest at this point) I don’t say anything I just look at her as she is leaning closer and closer to my face. Im leaning more and more into the couch lol. Her lips reach mine she kisses me I slowly kiss her back. BOY let me tell you my face was so damn hot. My face has and never will turn bright red, but at that moment I could have sworn it was. Long story short I was a nervous babydyke kissing a “straight” girl. And now you all know my first kiss was with a “straight” girl. :)

lol Happy Birthday, Roberto.

Please don’t try to climb trees to get to me ever again. I prefer to enjoy my morning coffee in peace with the birds.

Don’t tell him I forgot until sylva posted her gift to him, please!

somuchscience  asked:

I have a question for you. Is there a good way and a bad way to be a tourist at archaeological sites in Central America? Do some countries manage this tourism better than others? Do tourists' fees ever benefit researchers and restoration, or do they just fill the pockets of the guide companies?

The best way to be a tourist is to be respectful of the country you are in, respect the people that live there, and respect the sites you are visiting. Different countries have different traditions and customs of your own. If you disagree with those traditions, you disagree with them, but don’t openly mock people. And just because you may have more money than some does not give you the right to treat people like dirt. I’ve seen a few tourists who were obnoxious and way too entitled when they visited Mexico.

When you visit archaeology sites be mindful and respect the rules they have. Don’t litter, don’t be loud and obnoxious, and don’t try and climb onto every building and structure you see. Some buildings, while restored, may not be stable enough to climb. Those buildings that are stable enough to climb will be clearly marked. When you do get to the top of buildings, make sure to mindful of other tourists who are enjoying the view and experience. Please don’t do headstands on top of pyramids trying to absorb pyramid energy or align your chakra or any of that nonsense. I once saw a couple of hippies try that on the Sun Pyramid in Teotihuacan and another bunch at Monte Alban in Oaxaca.

I’ve never actually visited sites in Belize or Guatemala, so I’m not sure how they handle tourism compared to Mexico. Mexico seems to do a fairly decent job of keeping sites clean and accessible to the public. In Mexico you typically purchase one ticket and the money from that ticket is shared between INAH and the site. The site uses its portion of the ticket to pay for staff, upkeep, onsite museums, etc. INAH gets their cut because they are INAH, you can’t really argue with them on that. I’m not sure what they do with their cut, but I assume it is so that INAH can continue to function.

The only tourist guides that get money are the guides you pay. I don’t like using tourist guides, even at sites I am unfamiliar with. Typically tourist guides have a shaky understanding of the archaeological site and the culture that built it. That’s not to say that locals do not know anything about their ancestors, beliefs, histories, etc. But I have seen one too many tourists that spread nonsense about aliens, Atlantis, UFOs, mysterious lights, and hidden caches of treasure. A lot of them also spread out of date or misunderstood information (Maya predicted the end of the world or Aztecs practiced (heavy) cannibalism). I would rather do the research on the site ahead of time or after my visit, but that’s the archaeologist in me.