don t eat

I hope that Isak and Even are as happy as they are here in their new home. I am wondering what they are doing,and miss them a LOT. I know this is Sanas season,and I adore her,but these two will always have a special place in my heart. I wonder who makes dinner,what they make for dinner,I hope they don`t eat Grandiosa and kebab all the time,what kind of furniture they`ve got,if the freezer is okay,if Isak is sleeping on Evens chest right now,do they take long showers together,are Evens guitars there,and his drawings,does Isak have the drawings Even gave him in a frame on the wall,are they struggeling with IKEA-furniture,does Isaks dad still pay 4000; for his rent,I wonder if Even still try to make Isak dance in the kitchen,how does Even pay for the rent,did Isak get his beer and did he like the sparkling wine Even got them,will they have a housewarming party,what have they been doing since December 16th 2016,will Even be a russ this year,is he okay at school,have they said “I love you”,do they still take it “minute by minute”,day by day or are they passed that and sure about that this is IT,that they are endgame,have Even filled up the walls in their apartment with Baz Luhrman movie posters? So many questions,and it makes me sad that most of them probably never will get answered. Sana is the Queen,but these two are my favourites,and I hope they will stay together forever,have their grand fucking wedding and live as happy as they can. Right now they make me proud,but also sad over the things we will never get to know.


Signs of mental illness I displayed even as a child (incomplete list):

  • problems sleeping including:
    - having a hard time going to sleep
    - peeing my bed
    - crying in my sleep
    - waking up scared and disoriented
    - sometimes falling out of bed
  • being scared of adults including parents and others I knew
  • hiding/ isolating myself at times
  • getting sad for “no reason”, crying over little things
  • being mostly unable to complete homework while being good at doing work in school (seriously everyone just thought it was fortunate that I was still able to keep up instead of asking themselves “Why can this child work in school but not at home? What is wrong in their home?”)
  • downplaying my own problems
  • dissociating - it got called “daydreaming” and “being lazy/slow” and “not paying attention”
  • flashbacks from age 13 onwards (I don’t think anyone knew though)
  • disordered eating by on-and-off following a restrictive ““healthy”“ raw food diet from age 16 onward

This list is only so “short” because I was actively trained not to show signs of abuse/trauma/mental illness. I mean I was/we were trained to not react to triggers, to not flinch or lash out and to always appear happy and carefree.

my reactions while reading Tower of Dawn (spoilers!)
  • okay i hope you`re not draggy
  • oooOOoooHH Prince Sartaq ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • chaorian feels coming right up yes
  • “big no” HAHAHAHA roast him
  • “One of the blushing girls sighed at the sound of his name” literally me
  • my feels ok whenever Dorian is mentioned  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • like, chaol i can feel the love from the real world, ya know??
  • preoccupied all day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 
  • Kadara is my new cinnamon roll!!
  • tbh everytime they mention “I am not afraid,” all I can think of is Sam
  • “He avoided the urge to remind her that he was in this chair” lol same thoughts with Chaol
  • I love how Chaol talks highly of Rowan <3
  • Even Kashin knows what would Rowan would do
  • “Having lived with a prince for most of my life [..]”  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • might I add that, from what I observed in CoM and ToD, Chaol is a very active person ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • “I loved you before I ever set eyes on you” thiS IS INSTALOVE (which I`m always against with) BUT I SHIP IT????
  • thank the spiders because they don`t eat right away
  • C H A P T E R 48!!
  • I mean, I suspected, but still!!!! This is damn confirmation omg
  • shapeshifter fam!!!!
  • Chapter 55 is the closure all the Chaolaena shippers need
  • I was kind of laughing at how much he hated her though
  • But I love that even he understands the power that is Rowaelin
  • Things do change
  • Dorian as his light  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • *reminds self that things could change because Chaorian*
  • “interconnected lives” um ok
  • idk I just don`t ship them?? even right from the start
  • my thoughts might change on the next book though but right now i still don`t
  • I live for Chaol wanting to ride a horse named Butterfly
  • PLS
Sanha scenario where you're best friends and you're playing in the snow with the boys then suddenly he pulls you in for a kiss by your scarf

Genre: FLUFF!!!

The boys had invited you over to come play in the snow since it was the first time this year it was snowing. You gladly said yes because you absolutely love everything that has to do with snow.

“Yah! How dare you ruin my snowcastle!?” JinJin whined at Moonbin and Eunwoo who were laughing their asses of at his reaction. “Sorry little boy, please don´t tell your mom!!” Moonbin said jokingly. JinJin couldn´t do anything but laugh at them as he grabbed a handful of snow and threw it at them.

“Do you wanna build a snowman?” You heard Sanha sing from behind. You turned around to face him as you laughed at your lame best friend and nodded. “If I roll the two small balls and you roll the big one, is that okay?” You asked making sure your gloves were covering your hands. He gave you a thumbs up and grabbed some snow. “Make sure to leave out the leaves and gravel, I don´t want our snowman to look ugly” You added. “Sure boss” He said making you laugh.

You were done rolling the balls and the snow that once covered the ground were now gone. “Yah! You idiots used all the snow, me and Rocky were planning on making a snowman too” MJ whined. “It´s snowing so if you wait 30 minutes you will probably get enough snow to make the head” Sanha said trying to hide his laughter.

“Here” You said as you walked over to Sanha, handing him a carrot. He grabbed it and looked down at it while he licked his lips. “Don´t eat it!” You warned him giving him a glare. “Can´t promise anything.” You placed the twigs you had brought earlier on each side of the snowman, then started placing the eye on it´s face. You stepped closer to the head of the snowman, making yours and Sanha´s face only a few centi meters apart. 

Suddenly you felt two hands pull on the end of your scarf and warm soft lips press against yours, making you drop one of the eyes on the ground. Your actions completely froze. It took a few seconds before you actually realized what was going on. Why was he doing this? Does he like you? Why didn´t you push him away? Or more importantly, do you like him too? All these questions spun around in your head when you suddenly felt him pull away.

“Your lips looked cold” He simply stated as he continued building the snowman. You were completely speechless. How were you supposed to react to something like this? “Thank you. I feel a lot warmer now ” You said hiding the smile that started forming on your lips behind your scarf. Luckily for the both of you non of the boys noticed, and thank god for that.

-Admin Karoline

cowboyhatsarecool  asked:

Loved your HC about sleep talking MC. Could you do one with the RFA +V & Saeran about an MC who crochets things for them like blankets, hats, scarfs, even stuffed animals? Thanks!

So, after I googled what to crotch means xD, here you go! ≧ω≦


° You always thought that he was cute

° so you made cute things for him (*^▽^*)

° little gadgets you crotched for him like scarfs or hats

° he loved those and cherished them

° but you realized that he couldn’t wear 3 scarfs at the same time… ( TДT)

° it was physically impossible to do so no really ?

° you made up your mind and decided it was time to make something else

° you worked day and night on your new project

° in the end you made a cute little doll from a LOLOL character (*≧▽≦)

° the things you made were never bad or ugly but this one….

° it was a masterpiece!

° of course there weren’t many details, it was more like a chibi Version

° big head and eyes, small body, on one word: cute

° so perfect for Yoosung

° cute and cute mix well right?

° he came home late because of his club activities

° you patiently waited for his return

° when he arrived you rushed to the door and greeted him with a hug

° “Did something happen MC? You seem very cheerful today.”

° “I made something for you.”

° his face was saying: please not a scarf again!!

° lol

° “What did you made this time?” (・_・ヾ

° he was a Little scared but you overheard the this in his voice and dragged him to his Computer desk

° “Look, it´s a little figurine. I thought you have enough scarfs by now.”

° at first he was relived, at least not another scarf thank god!!

° but when he took a closer look he saw it was the character he always played in LOLOL

° “OH MY GOD!!!! MC this is just perfect!!”                                 o(〃^▽^〃)o

° you were really glad he liked it, all of your hrd work payed of, finally

° “I´m glad you like it Yoosung.”

° you were happy that you could give him something he seemed to like very much, so you were pleased with yourself

° as a thank you, he went on the most romantic date you could imagine

° awwwww

° so in the end, everyone was happy yay  o(≧∇≦o)


° you kept yourself occupied with handwork whenever Jaehee was away, which was often but that´s nothing new ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° soon there were new blankets and pillows all over the house

° at first she didn´t notice them but after a few weeks it clicked

° “MC, did you bought a new blanket again?”

° by the Looks of it, they were handmade and very expensive because of the good Quality

° “I didn´t bought anything.”

° “But where are all these things from? Blankets, pillows and even tablelothes…”

° “These? I made them.”

° you got up from your place on the Couch and set the new hat you were working on aside

° Jaehee looked like she didn´t believe you

° as a proof you showed her the work in Progress

° she couldn´t believe her eyes… (*〇□〇)

° she never knew you were so talented

° suprise Jaehee!

° as she saw your talent she asked you to make a few things for her

° scarfs, hats, a Poncho, gloves, and even a stuffed toy from Zen

° you had nothing to do anyway so you agreed

° as the weeks passed you got more and more work to do

° soon everybody from the RFA wanted to have something and you happyily made it

° Jaehee then had a brillinat idea, you could open your own online-shop

° with a little help from Seven, you made him a PhD Pepper-can-plushie in return, your website went online

° more and more requests arrived each day and your Hobby soon becae your fulltime Job

° on some days you were as busy as Jaehee but you never gave up on making little things for her (●♡∀♡)


°  you first had the idea to crotch something for him as a present for succesfully performing his new Play

° it was a small pillow and it said congrats for rocking the theatre

°   super cute, right? o(^▽^)o

° he never noticed on what you were working all the time but he saw that you did something

° he was confused why you always kept it a secret from him

° but hey, he understood that everybody has their secrets

° so you finished just in time for the first Performance of his new Play

° but you were a Little shy and didn´t gave it to him directly (*´∀`*)

° you decided to throw it onto the stage llike other fans did it with flowers and candy

° I wish someone would throw candy at me…

° your crotching skills may were quite well, your throwing skills weren´t

° which resulted in the pillow landing directly on his face

° ouch

° he looked irritated and then Kind of passive-aggressive (;¬_¬)

° you knew you did something wrong, but was it your fault that you weren´t good at throwing pillows??

° now it seemed like he startedto cry, your sense of fault was bugging you even more…

° but he eventually saw from who the pillow was thrown and his mood changed immediately

° the look on his face said that you´ll have to talk about that after the Show

° the Show was a bid succes (what else?) and you went to Zen´s Dressing room

° he was already there, with the pillow in his arms

° “This was you MC, wasn´t it?”

° you looked down, embarassed and nervous

° “Yes, it was me. I wanted to give you a suprise but it ended up hitting you. I´m sorry Zen.” (⌣_⌣”)

° “Why should I be angry at you? You´re not the first Person to throw somrthing at my face and you´ll surely won´t be the last.”

° he came towards you and kissed you

° “More importantly, I´m honored and very happy that you made me something so Special. I´m moved and I almost cried tears of joy.”

° so that´s why he cried…

° “I´m happy when you´re happy Zen. I just wanted to give you something since you´ve been practising so hard These past few weeks.”

° “So you mean if I Keep practising hard you´ll make more for me?”

° he looked like a Little child on Christmas morning o(≧∇≦o)

° “Sure, if you want that I can make more for you.”

° he picked you up and spun you around while you screamed in shock

° “Zen out me down, if I knew you´d be happy about this Kind of Thing I would have made something sooner.”

° from this day on you had to make something for every new Play he acted in

° oh, and the Foto from Zen who was crying came in the newspaper by the way XD


° face reality, you didn´t had anything to do in his huge Penthouse

° exept for Petting Elisabeth and waiting for Jumin´s return of Course

° so you made up your mind and decided to find yourself a Hobby

° first you tried teaching Elisabeth some tricks, failed

° then you wanted to start Yoga, failed

° after painting and the attempt of playing the piano, which caused the Violation of Elisabeth´s ears, you tried crotching

° to your and everyone elses suprise, you seemed to have a Talent for that

° of Course you had a few Troubles at the beginning but you became better really quickly o(^∀^*)o

° you started small and soon Elisabeth had a cute Little cape, and then 5

° when you thought she had enough you made something bigger

° first scarfs, then hats and pillows and after a while even whole blankets

° the penthouse looked like a cute little shop from an old Lady

° at first Jumin didn´t really care, he noticed the new things for his beloved cat but didn´t questioned it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° then there were all of these pillows

° they didn´t look bad and fit into the living room well, so why bother saying anything?¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° but he started to get a bit confused when the blankets started to appear all over the Couch

° “MC, where do all these crotched things come from? Not that they look bad but there are more by each day.”

° he didn´t sound angry or like he would ask you to throw them away, just confused

° “I started crotching and made all these things. If you don´t like them I can put them away or give to someone.”  

° you didn´t mind if they disappeared, it was only a hobby to kill time to begin with anyway

° “No, don´t take them away, I like them and I think you hold a Special Talent for crotching.”

° you were pleased with yourself and kept crotching, now for Jumin

° he was more than happy to receive the small presents you made especially for him

° it only got a bit embarassing when he wore a pink scarf to work XD

° anyone who looked weird at him got fired


° some People are good with Computers, some have amazing cooking skills

° you had neither

° but your  Talent was crotching, doesn´t Sound  too amazing, I know but it came in handy from time to time

° Seven sat infront of his Computer the whole day and sometimes the night too

° he had a good chair but even a high Quality object gets uncomfortable sometimes

° so you made  a small blanked on which he could sit

° it was made from good wool so the fluffyness didn´t vanished right away and he was able to sit comfortable

° at first he didn´t notice any difference about his chair

° he just wondered when his ass didn´t hurt like hell after 12 houres of work

° but hey, not like he would complain about it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° he got up to fatch some cans of PhD Pepper along with some Snacks

°  please don´t eat like him…. it´s not good

° when he came back he noticed something was off

° there was a small blanket on his chair which he had never seen before

° he felt Panic creep up in his mind and thought that someone had broken into his house ◑.◑

° however that is possible for the average human being…

° he sat down and was about to open a tab for the CCTV when you exited the bedroom

° you wanted to get youself a drink when you saw a very panicked Seayoung

° “What´s wrong with you? You look like you saw a ghost.”

° “MC, we have to leave. I think someone broke into our house…”

° he looked around to see if he could find anything out of the ordinary

° “Sure, what did this Person do? All of your cars are still here as well as your Computers and robots.”

° he packed you by your shoulders and looked deeply in your eyes

° “MC, they placed a small blanket on my chair….. I´ve never seen it before so it has to be from some intruder.”

° you looked at him

° then you laughed your ass off XD

° he was even more confused than before and tillted his head to one side

° “Why are you laughing? Don´t you take me seriouslay??”

° “I do but I doubt your eyesight. I made this blanket for your chair and placed it there before you started working.”

° at a closer look it really did look homemade and he noticed it was in his favourite shade of red

° after he calmed down you went to bed again and forced him to join you

° but he coulden´t sleep over all the exitement that he had because of your gift O(≧∇≦)O

° it didn´t look like much to others, youself included, but you thought about something usefull and it made him happy, especially because it was handmade

° seeing him overjoyed like Little kid overa simple blanket you decided to make more o(*>ω<*)o

° he fealt bad and made you a lot of Gadgets in return, you both were happy, giving and receiving small Gifts from each other

° but he still tightened the security, if that even is possible… XD


° you often thought about Things you could give him

° he was a fotographer but giving him Pictures was Kind of …… difficult

° he also didn´t really care for specific bands, which excluded CDs from the gift-list as well \|  ̄ヘ ̄|/

° the only Thing left you thought of was something like a plushie or a nice pillow

° but you thought it wasn´t a present from heart if you just bought some random stuff

° so you thought of croching something for him

° your grandmother thought you how to do simple stuff like scarfs and later how to make figures

° but you knew you needed some practice again in order to make something decent

° it wasn´t hard to hide it anyway…

° that sounds Kind of mean

°so you practiced and practiced

° the first of your works were offerd to Yoosung, beacuse he lost his scarf and to Jaehee

° later you made  a small cat for Jumin and another one for Seven

° of Course V noticed and he slowly became …..jealous

° just a few minuites before his present was almost finished he took the Courage to confront you with his Feelings

° “MC, why do you make all These Things for the RFA?” (*゚ー゚)ゞ

° you heard that he sounded a bitt nervous and quickly catched on with what was going on

° “Because Yosung neede a new scarf and Jaehee would have gotten sick…”

° he fidgeted with his Hands nervously

° “But why the small cats for Juimin and Saeyoung?”

° “They like cats and both of them helped me out o much over the past few months. Why wouldn´t I Show my gratitude.?”

° “ I understand. But I´d ish for you to make me something as well…”

° he spoke tha last part so quiet tha you almost didn´t heard it and you pretended you didn´t

° “Well, now that I´m finished with my masterpiece I´m going to give ot to it´s rightful owner,”

° he looked hurt ~(>_<~)

° but only for a Brief Moment untill you placed the soft figure of a stuffed camera in his Hands

° “Here, I made this for you. As  present. I practiced hard and I gave the practice products to the others. You know I tink you deserve only the best.”

° he was moved to tears as he Held the small camera Close to his heart

° he even started to cry for gods sake!

° “Thank you so much MC. I can´t express how happy you made me by doing this for me.”

° he gave you a big hug and a sweet kiss

° with this you decided to never give someone exept him a homemade-whatever

° needless to say he was very happy about that ;)


° he was edgy (this is my word of the week by the wayXD)

° so he needed edgy stuff in his room

° unfortunately he didn´t like common pillos or blankets

° so yo had to dye all of the bedsheet black and the pillows too ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° while you were at it you dyed yours as well

° but his room still looked Kind of lonly, there was only a bed and a wardrobe, all painted in black

° you made up your mind and made some decors yourself, all black and Grey obviously

° first it was a small blanket to put on bed when it wasn´t used

° then there appeared two identical cute pillows on eac side of the bed

° followed by more pillows and after some time two small figurines, repreenting you and Saeran cute

° he was happy, although he was a bit shy to admit it to you in Person

° instead he showed his happiness by sharing his most important Thing with you

° ice cream

° he bought a big bucket of Ben´n´Jerry´s and invited you over for a DVD night, although he hoped it wouldn´t just saty by watching onlx DVDs if you know what I mean ( ° ʖ °)

° you arrived at his place and he opend the door for you, gesturing you to step inside

° you made yourself a home on his Couch hile placing the new pillows you made on it

° they were black with the letters S and C, Saeran Choi (or if your Name starts with C you can Interpret it as that XD)

°  he joined you there and started the film, noticing two new items in his Collection of Things made by you

° “MC, I know I never said thid but I´d like to thank you for all of the Things you made. I realice I don´t Show it very good but I´m extremly happy about them and I value them. Forever, I promise.”

° he gave you a sweet kiss and you were at a loss of words (。♥‿♥。)

° a tear started to fall down on your cheek and Saeran thought he said something bad again

° “I´m happy you likethem. And even more that you told me so. I love you Saeran.”

° “I love you too MC, more than I´m able to express.”

° you hugged him and took this a s an offer to turnoff the TV beacuse he was turned on now

° wasn´t that a brilliant choice of words? XD

° all I say from this Point on is that he didn´t Need the day-blanket for a while now wink ( ° ʖ °)

So, I´m finally finished. I apologice for taking this Long but I´m on Holidays in Malta right now and so I don´t have a lot of time writing actually. Before anyone complains that I have time when I´m on Holiday, I actually go to School here to improve my english….
But anyway, I really hope you like it and that it makes up a tiny bit for taking so Long <3

The kiwi goes to space

Hello friends and family~ 

It is I, your favorite Jen on planet earth (probably not lmao) here to announce that it is now official: I´m going to sell stickers! 

You have seen me talking about it a lot, because I get super excited about things very fast. I sat down and made some designs and now you can see the results over at redbubble.

Click here to get to the shop or search for spacekiwi on redbubble.

These pictures don´t show them all, I ordered some to check the quality. There will be three sets and individual stickers, so you can pick whatever you prefer. What I like is that they are “pre-cut” so you don´t have to cut them out. They come to you as shown in the picture above (the stripes are the size “small” and the larger one ist “medium”)

At the moment you can choose between six designs of BUNKOOK , seven designs of BTS DESSERTS (which I redrew only 90 kids will remember…) and some random three designs of the BUNMODE of Jungkook. 

You can basically get them in four sizes: 

Things I can´t recommend: Buying the sets in small. They didn´t turned out that good, so I´ll have a proper look at this later. But everything else should be fine. :) If not you can hunt me down. 

The price varies of course regarding the size you choose between 2,18 € and 13,10 € (something about 2,50 - 15,20 $ / 1,95 - 11,45 £) plus shipping which varies depending from where you´re from. 

The stickers are of a quite thick matt material, they are easy to release from the paper and also feel really nice… But don´t lick or eat them kids, that´s unhealthy. 

I don´t know if there is anything else to report… If I missed something let me know. If you have questions in general let me know too!!! 

I´ll put the link in the blog description too, so everyone can find it. 

If you guys are happy with the stickers, maybe I can create more designs in the future. But for now I think its a good start :)… I hope you guys like the output! 

I would love to hear some feedback if anyone of you order some! That would also help me regarding to correct and improve. So… yeah. ok I guess that´s it.

Love you guys - Jen 

anonymous asked:

Can you do a fanfic where MC thinks Zen has been cheating on her and tries to commit suicide with White and Dark chocolate endings?

So good that you liked the idea of dark and white chocolate. :3

I like the Idea of the butterfly effect (that one simple action can change everything) so it’s good to write different endings, it is fun.

Dark chocolate: Angst, trigger warnings,

White chocolate: Fluff?, trigger warnings.

P.S I change the “why” 



You have been acting weird lately.

Sometimes you don´t want to eat, you say that is because you don´t have time and your work is overwhelming you.

Sometimes you don´t want to hang out like the old times and you just go to sleep.

You were always challenging yourself and we use to do work out together but now you’re always tired.

Maybe your work is too much…

I try to do surprise romantic dates…but you never come to the house until after 1am.

You don´t know this but one time you said you were going to come early to the house and you didn´t , I bought your favorite food and went to your job but…you weren´t there…

Sometimes I think you don´t like me anymore…Or maybe I´m being too melodramatic as you say…

Flash back.

-Zen coma to you and said “Mc“

-You were on the computer “I´m working…” you said in a monotone voice

-“It will just take a minute.”

- You take off your glasses and turn around “What?”

-“I found a line on this new script, that I want to dedicate to you” he  closes his eyes to put himself in character “I can go corny and say That your lips taste the same way that when I kiss you in my dreams”


-“Ahmm…well. Maybe it doesn´t sound that good translated, but the director said It comes from a very beautiful song and it-“

-“I mean that if you are done?”

-“…”His surprised by your abrupt way to say it “ye-yeah…”

-“Ok.” you put your glasses on again and start to type in your computer with no reaction

End of flash back.

I don´t like when you push me away, or maybe I´m a just want attention like you to say…but is true I want…no, I need your attention, I want that your beautiful eyes look at me because is the only reflection where I don´t see myself, is where I see my love for you…I want you, I need you…

I thought this will be just a phase and when you finish your work project, you would be like before but this is going for a long time…

I will talk to you, after my Interview for the new role.

White chocolate:

-“Zen?” a girl called Zen


-“The director is a little bit late but he will be here at any moment.”

-“No problem”

*Horaes later*

-A short man comes through the door and yell “I´m here”

-“Director….”  The girl said

-“yeah yeah I now I´m late but my son got sick and vomit all over me and I had to take him to the hospital and then a dick hit my car ´accidentally´, we had a problem and we argue and this shity bastard slap me, THE BICH SLAP ME!. Let´s just say I had a bad day…”

-“I´m sorry to hear that, director”

-The director took the papers that the girl had “This is the last interview?”

-“yes! His name is Zen and personally, I think he is really talented and…” the girls suddenly stop



Originally posted by nyanpasuminasan

-“Control yourself. You have to be professional”

-“Sorry…” she said to the director and then when to a door and open it “Zen you are next”

-“Thank you” Zen got up and followed the girl.

-“Ok Zen look at the camera and …did you learn the part of the script that we send to you?” The director said to Zen

-“Yes, sir.”

-“Well, give you best shot”

- he closes his eyes to put himself in character “When I was younger I wasn´t afraid of anything, I thought If I had to die there will be no problem with me at all…but then I meet a woman that change everything. I started to think that I wanted to survive and for the first time the Idea of death began to scare me, I never felt that kind of feeling …always paralyzed”

-“and where is she now?” the assistant said part of the script

-“…”Zen look at the camera with eyes of pain “She…faded it off somewhere-“

-“Stop!” the director shout

- “pardon?”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

- “You have the role…”

- “Ahhh what?”

- “Look the dialogue is 30mins long and I don´t have the time,  my son is in the hospital. And just that line you interpreted was wonderful, you latterly made me gay for 1 minute and I almost tear up” The director said with a straight face. “Plus, my assistant here says that you are very talented and I trust her. So…you have the role.” The director got up from his seat “See you tomorrow at 5. Oh and take this” He gave Zen a bunch of papers “is the full script of the musical. I will give you a quick idea of what is about because people think is about a guy that is talking to an angel but in reality is a guy talking to his dead girlfriend that killed herself…”

-“Killed herself?”

-“Yeah, she suffered from depression and just one day she changes from a very energetic girl to someone that didn´t have time or energy to do anything.”

-“Just like that?”

- “Of course not. She was depressed years before but she hide it from everyone and the real 3 stages that she passed were,1 the normal when nothing happened and she was herself,  2 trying to hide it with a fake smile and energy that she didn´t have, and 3 the boom! Where she couldn´t handle it anymore and pay back all the energy that she used before and then… she committed suicide…So…tomorrow at 5…ok?”

- “…” Zen entered into deep thinking

-“Zen?” the assistant said worriedly

- “Yeah! Yes sir. At 5” Zen grab his jacket and walk to the exit without saying goodbye

- Zen entered to his house freaked out by what the director told him “Mc?” Zen scream your name hoping you were home to talk to you. But the silence was the only one that responds “mc?” he dropped the script and walk around the house to tried to find you. When he got to the bedroom he heard water that was dropping from the bathroom. “Mc are you there?”  Zen knock the door several times. “MC!” He keeps calling you but nothing. Zen gave a few steps back and with his leg kick the door with all his force making the door get open.

-Zen run to the bathroom and saw you with your clothes on, in a full bathtub, water all over the floor. You were drowning…

Originally posted by numb--sadness

Zen pull you from the water and took you in his arms “mc…” he took you face “Mc! Respond!” moving you, shaking you, everything that came to his mind. He took your wrist to take your pulse Low but still there “please” tears were running down Zen face and with his shaky hands put you on the floor and he began performing CPR on you, tilting your head back and lifting your chin. Pinch your nose, cover your mouth with his , and gave 2 breaths. Zen Watch to make sure the chest was rising.

-And finally, you spit water and woke up taking a big chunk of air and then Coughing more water.

- Zen could finally breathe again and gave a big sigh of reliving. He didn´t say anything and just gave you a big hug

-“Why?” you said with little force “Why you didn´t leave me to die”

-“Because I´m an egoist that want you alive”

-“let me go” you move with your little force you had

-“No!” he didn´t let you go

-“You don´t know what I´m going through”

-“Exactly, I don´t know but I want to. Please…”He grabs your head and forces you to see him at his beautiful cherry red eyes “I swear to protect you,  I´m your knight let me protect you, mc…”

Dark chocolate:

-“Zen?” a girl called Zen


-“The director is a little bit late but we will be here at any moment.”

-“No problem”


-“ yeah yeah I now I´m late but You won´t believe what happened!”

-“What happened?” the girl respond

-“My son had a date with a cute girl and when I took him to the restaurant, I found out that…you know who is Andrew aka ´The king´?”

-“Yes, the famous British actor”

-“Well, He is the brother of the date of my son! So I talk to him since we were not going to leave two teenagers alone…and I talk to him about the musical and he loved it! So I gave him the role”



-“he is a really good actor too. I´m sure of that!”

-“and he is famous?”

-“Well, he is not as famous as Andrew but…”

-“Just say to the kid that the role is taken, ok?”

-“Yes…” the girl said with her head down


-“The director is ready?”

-“I´m sorry to say that the role is taken…”

-“What but?” Zen was confused


-“No don´t worry…sometimes happens…thank you anyways.” Zen took his jacket ready to leave

-“Zen!” the girl stop Zen

-He turned around and said“Yeah?”

-“I´m a big fan of yours”

-“thank you?” so out of the blue

-“Do you mind if…I can bother you with a beer?”


-“I know you have a girlfriend…is just that I will not see you and this will be my last opportunity to ever see you again like this…” She heard silence and panicked “But if you don´t want to that is ok-“

-Zen interrupt the panicking girl and said “Yeah! Let´s go for a beer”

-“Thank you!”

In the bar

-“nice bar…” Zen looks at the place

-“It´s one of my favorites”

- And then Zen grab his beer and took a big sip “Mmmhhh…And the beer is delicious”He looked down and said “I used to go with my girlfriend in bars like this to watch football”

-“She wasn´t one of those girls that hated this types of places?”

-“No, actually she loved this…” he smirk by the good memories

Originally posted by martabuzz

-“And now?”

-“She doesn´t have time…”

-“That´s sad…”

-“Well, she had been different”


-“She never has time, she doesn’t like the cheesy things I give to her anymore, she doesn´t talk to me, comes late home-“


-“What the fuck did you just said?” Zen turn around to see who said that

-“Zen don´t listen to him he is just a drunk dude” the girl tried to calm the water


-Zen was trying to not kill him


-“Shut up!” Zen got up and tots the chair


-Zen got closer to the guy and grab his shirt and whisper “Say something else and I will crush your teeth”

-“You hear that?” The dude put a face of crazy “I can hear her moans from her ahhh~ ahhhh~”

Originally posted by vhs-ninja

-“ZEN!” the girl scream

-“I´m going” Zen didn´t even grabbed his jacket and just left


-why is so difficult to open this stupid door when I´m drunk “MC!” why is she not answering “Hey!” O fuck I almost hit the coffee table but where is she “I want to talk with you” Maybe she is in the bathroom “Can you open the door!” why she doesn´t open the door? “What? Are you not talking to me?”FUCK “MC!”Uh fuck everything is moving I will sit down “YOU KNOW WHAT!  I can handle anymore this…I love you but I don´t know what is happing you with you, so I will give you time…”Yeah, time cures everything “When you are ready to talk to me…I will sleep in a hotel so don’t worry…”I´m getting up uff this is hard “Maybe tomorrow I will come to grab my things…”

And Zen left the place…

Special Agent 606, Out.If you want to request here are the rules: HERE/Masterlist: Here

anonymous asked:

Could you do RFA+Saerran coming home to smol MC that made them cookies while they were out? Thank youu😘

Aww such a cute request ^-^

I´m so tiny so that is 100percent me

I hope this is to your liking Anon.

I took the liberty to add the whole minor trio as a bonus they all deserve cookies !


  • When he comes home he already smells the fresh baked cookies.
  • So that what you been up to while he was out ? He thinks
  • Zen goes to the living room and sees a plate full of fresh baked cookies and they all look like music notes and it looks so cute to him.
  • Then he sees you still in a apron and you look so cute he goes over to you and hugs you and then he just picks you up and cuddles you some more because you are so sweet.
    You pout a bit since you don´t really like being picked up like that but that makes you only even more cute to him.
  • Zen really enjoys the self made cookies even when they not part of his diet but they are the best think ever to him.
  • He feeds you the self made cookies and gives you a kiss.


  • When he comes back from the store he smells cookies how did you do that so fast ?
  • He finds you still in the Kitchen decorating the cookies you just made.
  • They all in random animal shapes and they look really cute.
  • He asks why you made them and thinks they must be a present for someone.
  • You smile at him and tell him they for him.
  • Yoosung first thinks he forgot his own birthday or something but no you just felt like baking him cookies.
  • That is just the sweetest think ever he finds them all so cute and he almost don´t want to eat them but you insist on it.
  • They taste really great to him and he kisses your forehead while you standing in front of him.
  • Yoosung shares the cookies with you even when they where all for him.
  • Also takes a picture of them and sends them in the chat to make everyone jealous it works.


  • She is very late home and is very tired.
  • Then she smells the fresh cookies and sees you while putting them in a box to keep them fresh.
  • Jaehee asks why you made cookies and you tell her they for her and Jaehee finds it so cute of you.
  • You also made her some coffee and she really loves you for that.
  • Jaehee tries one if the cookies and they are really good she loves them and is really glad you made them just for you.
  • She also gives you some since you made so many anyways.
  • Jaehee finds it so sweet that you made cookies for he she later thanks you with a kiss.
  • She takes some to work with her since they just so tasty and they give her a energy boost.


  • When he comes home from work he smells the cookies and he thinks you asked the chef to make some.
  • He knows you like sweets so it would not surprise him.
  • Jumin finds you in the kitchen still decorating the cookies you look really cute to him in your apron.
  • He sees that the cookies are all cat shaped he finds it cute that you make cookies and its even more cute how they all cats.
  • You tell him there are all for him and makes Jumin speechless how can you be so sweet.
  • You give him a cookie to try it and he finds it really tasty he loves it that you baked something just for him.
  • Jumin thinks they are the best cookies in the whole world you think that is not true at all.
  • Jumin hugs you tightly and asks you to make some again some time and of course you will gladly do that.
  • He tells everyone how sweet you are to him.


  • He was only out to wash his car so he is really surprised when he smells cookies when he comes back.
  • He looks for you and you are just bringing the cookies to the living room.
  • You smile at him and he wonders how you baked cookies that fast.
  • He wants one and comes over to steal one from you but you tell him they for him anyway so he ca have them all.
  • At first thinks you are kidding him but you are too sweet to that so he takes one to try it and they are really delicious.
  • He is very happy that you made cookies just for him you the cutest think ever too him.
  • He picks you up princess style and gets with yon the couch and their you eat all the cookies together.

Spoilers for the minor trio -aka V Saeran and Vanderwood - just in case


  • -he can see in this because I want everybody to be happy-
  • When he comes home to you he thinks something smells really good.
  • You come to him  with a wide smile and he sees the cookies you made for him.
  • He is really glad that you made something home made just for him and the cookies all look really good to him.
  • You offer him one and he gladly takes one and they are really tasting great.
  • He loves that you just desisted to just bake something for him to him you are the cutest think ever.
  • You two sit on the couch you sit in his lap and you feed him your self made cookies.
  • V will differently get more cookies from you in the future.


  • When he is coming home he already is wondering what you are up too when you not greet him.
  • He looks for you and he finds you in front of the oven waiting for cookies to be done.
  • Saeran asks you why you make cookies.
  • You tell you wanted to bake something sweet for him.
  • Saeran finds that so sweet from you he loves sweets and he waits with you in front of the oven till the cookies are done.
  • Then you both decorate them with chocolate and wait till they cold enough to eat.
  • Saeran thinks they the best think he had ever eaten and he definitely wants more selfmade cookies from you.
  • Later he kisses you and tells you you are much sweeter then the cookies you made.


  • When he comes home and he smells cookies he feels like you planed to kill him -old habits die hard
  • You just smile at him and tell him they for him and he is so surprised that you made anything for him.
  • You offer him one he tries a bite and they are not tasting bad actual they are really delicious.
  • Quite surprising to him he says he is glad you thought about him.
  • You are glad he likes the cookies you tell him they all for him he feels really overwhelmed by your sweetness.
  • He gladly eats all the cookies you gave him and he hopes you will bake some more in the future for him

Take a look at my Masterlist my requests are open so drop by !

10 ideas that won´t let you lose weight

I found this list of thoughts and identify with all 10 of them. I´m sharing this for anyone else in the same place. Now I will avoid them whenever I find myself thinking about that.

1.        I´m hungry. If I don´t eat, I will be hungrier. I need to eat now.

2.       I don´t have to plan anything. I will be capable to make the right choices in the moment.

3.       I need to eat, I can´t calm down until I eat.

4.      I slipped in temptation, I will eat anything for the rest of the day and I´m going to start again tomorrow.

5.       This wasn´t in my meal plan but… since “it´s free”, “special”, “just a little”…

6.      It´s not fair that I can´t eat what I want and need to limit myself.

7.       Following a meal plan is so hard. I can´t do it. I will never lose weight.

8.      I can´t believe it, I´ve gained a lot of weight and I´ve worked so hard on my diet. It´s not worth the sacrifice.

9.      If I could only find the magical diet, I could lose weight quickly and I will go back to eat as I used to.

10.    Why can´t I eat the same things other people eat without getting fat?

A Fall Day with the Deh kids

Honestly Fall is my favorite season. Here’s some fall head cannons for spending a day with the Deh kids. Requests are open.

  • It would start with the six of you heading to a local coffee shop to get fall drinks and treats.
  • Zoe would order a pumpkin spice latte with a slice of apple pound cake while Connor would order apple cider with a small coffee cake.
  • Alana would get Chai tea with cinnamon and pumpkin sprinkled in and a vanilla scone. Jared would get a pumpkin spice frappuccino with a brownie and you and Evan would get hot chocolates with festive cookies.
  • Then, you took your drinks and treats over to the shop square to look at the fall decorations and other fall things.
  • It took awhile to convince Zoe and Alana to leave the scented candle place
  • “Alana, Zoe come on.” “But (Y/N) this one smells like Fall leaves.” “I know but you’ve been in here for 30 min-JARED DON”T EAT THE BATHBOMBS.”
  • Connor stayed outside like he didn’t know you and Evan was hiding his embarrassed face in his hands.
  • Alana ended up buying three scented candles, Zoe bought scented body wash, and Jared bought five bathbombs.
  • After that, you guys headed over to Connor and Zoe’s house to relax for awhile.
  • Zoe insisted on making a big leaf pile.
  • Like really big.
  • Each of you took a full bag of leaves from each of your houses to make the pile big.
  • Connor and Zoe had a big autumn tree in their backyard so the majority of the leaves came from there.
  • When the pile was finished, it was big enough, that you could jump in from the tree.
  • Jared was the first one to jump in.
  • Zoe actually pushed him in because he was taking too long.
  • Evan was a little hesitant because he didn’t to break his arm again.
  • You and Connor reassured that the both of you would catch him.
  • Evan ended up knocking both and Connor to the ground when he landed.
  • That lead to Zoe, Jared and Alana dog pilling on the three of you.
  • You guys were now a pile of teenagers, in a pile of leaves, laughing your heads off.
  • You stayed like that for awhile, looking up at the sky and watching the leaves fall.
  • You could stay like this forever.