domestic happiness

that feeling when you’ve been reading all those gentle soft happy fanfics where everyone is gay and in love and it’s not a big deal and their friends all support them.

and your favourite superhero couples and detectives and kings and warlocks are just domestic and happy.

and then you emerge into the real world and it’s just not like that.

you walk into your job in the morning and know that if anyone knew, you’d be out the door. kids use the word ‘gay’ as a slur and it might be silly but it makes something hurt inside your chest. you look at your mother and think of the words she’d use to cut you with if you told her. the disgust on her face. you have your family around you and you know it could all be shattered in a minute and it would be you who’d done it.

everyone assumes your straightness. people look at you strangely when you use ‘they/them’ pronouns when asking what their fiancé’s name is, bcs you don’t want to make the same mistake that others make with you. you file forms with spaces for the mother’s name and father’s name and wonder how you’d fill them out if you had a partner and a child. you work with children and wonder what they have to hide about themselves.

and then, sometimes, you go home and read some more fanfic. maybe you write some, or draw fanart if that’s your thing. that’s the best thing, that we’re dreaming about a better world. maybe we’re not famous or published or earning money for what we do. but writing and reading fanworks like this helps a heck of a lot of people, including me, feel happy and comforted and like it’s possible that they might belong one day. that it gets better.

thank you, everyone who creates fanworks where being gay is simply treated as normal. your work is healing and wholesome and full of heart and goodness. and much as i may love the canon, it’s not the canon - it’s the fanworks that are a safe haven to retreat to and recover and heal.

Dad Pun Sentence Starters

Send one to my Muse, or alternatively send  👍and my Muse will say one to you!

“What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.”
“Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.”
“A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, ‘Sorry we don’t serve food here.’”
“Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little horse!”
“How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!”
“Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.”
“I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.”
“How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.”
“Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.”
“'Wow, you’re a fart smella…I mean smart fella!”
“I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!”
“What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1”
“Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.”
“What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.”
“How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.”
“Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.”
“I just watched a program about beavers. It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen.”
“Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.”
“How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.”
“Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”
“Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with.”
“Don’t call me later, call me Dad.”
“What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant”
“Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.”
“What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.”
“Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.”
“What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.”
“I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. It’s a total rip-off.”
“The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.”
“This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.”
“5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.”
“Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?”“
"What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.”
“What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller.”
“I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.”
“To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide but you can’t run.”
“The rotation of earth really makes my day.”
“I thought about going on an all-almond diet. But that’s just nuts.”
“What’s brown and sticky? A stick.”
“I’ve never gone to a gun range before. I decided to give it a shot!”
“Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.”
“Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.”
“A furniture store keeps calling me. All I wanted was one night stand.”
“I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.”
“Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head.”
“I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks.”
“People don’t like having to bend over to get their drinks. We really need to raise the bar.”

Concept: it’s our first winter morning in our new house together. As I wake up I’m filled with excitement and I run into the living room to find you waiting with breakfast and hot chocolate for us both. It’s snowing outside and we’re freezing cold but we’re both filled with joy to finally be together

Hi, babies! I hope it is nice where you are as it is where I am today!
It’s one of the nicest days we’ve seen so far, which is something that is taking some getting used to since moving up north, which is quite a change since I grew up in the south!

This little bottle is, as it says, for happiness. Pure happiness, in and out. Everyone needs a little bit of sunshine in their day, right?! Right! Let’s get on with this guy then!

  • sea salt - for protection
  • basil - for confidence and courage
  • marjoram - for happiness
  • rosemary - for matters of the heart 
  • oregano - for joy
  • mint - for peace
  • orange peel - for emotional peace

This jar was made with the intent of happiness inside and out, because I’m a believer that happiness with yourself is so so important, because you are worthy of love and happiness, always!

As you fill it up, declare what each herb is going to do for you, and FEEL that happiness in your voice as you declare it (believe it!) cork that up, and seal it (I used yellow, lemon scented wax because what is happier than yellow and lemons to me? Not much! Also I have a tutorial of how I seal bottles with wax here!)

Carry it around when you need some sunshine in your day!

I would love to see your recreations! Please tag me if you do!

I hope this was helpful, let me know if you make it, send me photos of yours!
You can also check out my other jars here!

Have a beautiful day, babies! Take care of yourself!

4

It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.”

Happy birthday @hybriddutyofcare

going into the victuuri tag on ao3 like

“au where Viktor and Yuuri break up”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

“au where Viktor is abusive”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

“au where Viktor takes advantage of Yuuri at the Sochi banquet”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

“au where one of them cheats on the other”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

happy belated birthday  @magnusragnor  ♥

elle you are an incredible person and an amazing writer, i couldn’t be more grateful to have met you and call you friend. love you!!

i am so sorry it took me so long to post this but i hope you like it

(the biggest thanks to @maghnvsbane who was the most patient beta i could have asked for and went above and beyond when helping me with this)

Sometimes Alec reminds Magnus of a cat.

He can’t remember the first time the idea formed in his mind, but it had probably been before they started dating. Back then, Alec had acted like a stray cat, wanting affection but so afraid to receive it – letting his guard down one moment just to be defensive the next, wary and hissing every time he felt threatened. Magnus had found himself reacting in kind, scared of doing something that would only spook him further, instead extending a cautious hand and holding his breath, hoping it will be perceived like the offering it was but knowing it could be scratched instead.

Now that they are together, the image Alec conjures in Magnus’ mind is that of a content, spoiled cat. Never shy about seeking affection when they’re alone, closing his eyes and melting every time Magnus runs his fingers through his hair, practically purring when touched in the right places – and Magnus delights in discovering and exploring all the right places.

Keep reading

Bananas Vs Chocolate

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @kaxpha! Your real gift will be up by this weekend I HOPE! <3 This is a pre-gift bc I can’t do much with the little time I have but well, I tried.

Disclaimer: Voltron doesn’t belong to me. Just Tiny Sunshine Rey, that one’s mine.


“Papa.”

Lance groans at the calling and rolls over, burying his face on the neck of his husband and hopes the tiny quiet voice by his side disappears.

“Papa, up.”

Maybe if he stays quiet and don’t say anything it will go away?

“Papa, you already failed at being quiet, you’re mumbling.”

Well, Keith has always said that he thinks out loud most of the time.

“Papa’s not here.” Lance mumbles groggily, his hand patting the bed around him until it caught the end of his blanket and pulled it over his head. “Leave a message after the tone. Beep.”

He hears a soft giggle by his side and it makes his heart warm. “Papa, come on! It’s Sunday! And Sunday means Pancakes! Normal pancakes! Not the banana thingy Daddy makes.”

“I heard that.” Keith complains sleepily on his side, eyes still close and face buried on his pillow.

Lance bites his lower lip to suppress the chuckle that threatens to escape from his mouth. “Buddy, it’s Lazy Sunday. Why aren’t’ you being lazy?”

“Because, Papa! Pancakes with chocolate chips and strawberries!” It’s not even seven am and Lance wonders how his son can have this much energy so early in the morning.

“Nope, Papa’s not here. Ask Daddy.” He says instead, huffing when he feels a tiny knee on his stomach over the blanket and tiny hands patting his head.

“Daddy’s offended by the insult on his Banana Pancakes, ask Uncle Hunk.” It’s Keith’s muffled reply.

“Uncle Hunk lives half an hour from here.” Rey says pouting and Lance’s so close to give in but he needs to be strong, because it’s Lazy Sunday, that means no getting up until ten, cuddle with his husband in bed and –

The blanket above him suddenly falls, two small hands pulling it away from him and then Lance’s knows he’s a goner as soon as his blue eyes meet a bright pair of amber ones.

“Hi, Papa.” Rey giggles and Lance’s heart beats happily at the sound.

He smiles back softly and so tenderly at his son as he raises one hand and strokes Rey’s wild bed hair. “Hi, sunshine, good morning.”

“Okay, looks like we’re up then.” Keith says, yawning loudly and big before rolling over and meeting his family, “Hello, hello.”

Rey beams at him and leans down, dropping a big sloppy kiss on his cheek, “Hiya, Daddy.”

“Hi, buddy. You slept well?” He asks, smiling softly when he feels his husband’s lips on his forehead, pressing a soft kiss on it as a greeting.

Rey nods, “Yep!”

Lance shift a little and sits on the bed, bringing Rey closer to him gently and placing him on his lap, “Okay, alright! Tiny Rey Alejandro has defeated us bravely and now we must give him his reward.”

“Chocolate chip pancakes?” Rey exclaims happily, raising his arms in the air and Lance smirks down at him.

“No ~” He sing-songs and shares a quick look with his husband, who smirks back at him, getting the message, “It means…”

“Tickle Fight!” Keith finishes, throwing himself on top of the pair and starting to tickle his son’s sides as Lance holds him down on his arms.

While Rey’s squeals and laughter echoes around their room as he trashes wildly on his Papa’s arms, both parents grin wide at their son’s happiness.

“D – Daddy, no! S –Stop! The p – pancakes!!” Rey giggles and Keith chuckles under his breath.

“Say my Banana Pancakes are great.” He says playfully and Rey laughter grows as Keith moves his hand around, now tickling the five years old’s tummy.

“Now that’s just torture, Keith.” Lance teases from behind Rey and Keith sends him a flat look.

“You’re next, Mister, but first I’m gonna take care of this little fella.” Keith declares and the next thing Rey knows, his pajama top is up and then Keith blows a raspberry against his tummy.

Rey’s laughter just grows at that. “Daddy! N – No!! Haha! Stop! Papa, s – save me!”

Lance chuckles at his son’s plead, “I don’t know, Rey, I say you should surrender.”

“B – But the panca – Haha!! Daddy! The pancakes, P –Papa!”

Lance hums and makes a face as if thinking it over, “You’re right, Rey! We can’t let Banana Mullet –“

“Really, Lance?”

“ – Steal our precious chocolate chip pancakes with no bananas!” In a quick move, Lance pulls Rey out of his husband’s grip and then grins at Keith.

“It’s time for our come back attack, Rey Alejandro. What is your command?” He says, saluting formally at his still giggling son.

“Tickle Resistance!” Rey shouts between giggles and Lance nods firmly.

“Tickle Resistance!” He echoes and then he tackles a confused Keith on the middle of the bed, laughing loudly as he feels the tiny body of his son on top of him.

“Oh my god – You nerds! Haha – Lance! Watch your knee! Oh my god –“Keith grunts but laughs gleefully on the bottom of the pile, dropping his head back in defeat, “I, Keith Kogane the Second, surrender under Rey Alejandro’s power. Banana Pancakes shall never see the light of day ever again.”

Rey’s head pop out from Lance’s shoulders, meeting his Daddy’s eyes, “Except Thursday’s Nights right? It’s not movie night without Banana Pancakes.”

Keith manages to free one of his hands and scratches his chin as in deep thought, “I don’t know, Mister, my Banana Pancakes feel a little underappreciated right now.”

“No, Daddy!”

“They might never be at our table again.”

“Daddy! No!”

“You’re gonna make him cry.” Lance chimes, slapping his husband shoulder playfully.

Keith chuckles, “Alright, alright, Banana Pancakes will make their comeback on Thursday’s Nights. You’re lucky you’re so adorable, Mister.”

“Why, thank you.” Lance grins and Keith raises and eyebrow at him.

“I was talking to Rey.”

“Why, thank you, Daddy.” Rey says pleased, nodding in approval.

“Are you going to move anytime soon or?” Keith asks after a few minutes in silence, when Lance and Rey haven’t moved from their spot on top of him.

Lance and Rey share a smile between them before looking down on him.

“Nah.”

“What a morning.” Keith says flatly but smiles big and wide as soon as his family laugh freely and happy at his words.

It’s a good day to have chocolate chip pancakes, anyways.

Gee Akko! How come Luna Nova lets you have two moms?

Happy LWA Week! Day 5: A team/character of your choice
s/o to @bowtiebun for listening to me cry over charoix ideas on a daily basis