I hate Hetalia. It has literally ruined my life? My friends? Sacrificed to Doitsu. My money? Spent on all of this stupid fucking merchandise that ended up being all bootleg in the end anyway. My mom threw me out of the house after I drew gay countries on her favorite coffee table. I’m about to sell my liver for a ticket to Hetalia Land at this very moment. Please. Please turn and walk away before it’s too late….
Note to Fanfiction writers: Italy doesn’t actually say Doitsu. Doitsu is the japanized version of Deutschland, and because “land” is hard as heck to pronounce with the set of japanese sounds they have to work with, “Doitsu” is the shortened version and is probably the closest thing to the actual sound of the deutschland out of all the names in different languages for germany i’ve seen. So Japan can say “doitsu-san” all day but it makes no sense for italy please research things please please please
Today Italy wrote love letters and poems to Doitsu. He threw them all away because he would be to embarrassed to give it to him and he thought Doitsu wouldn’t like it. When Doitsu found it in the trash he was so happy Italy cared for him and kept the letters.
Today Italy refused to walk home and Doitsu carried him all the way home. He then ended up staying the night since it was late. He slept on the couch and when he woke up he found Italy laying on top of him, nearly strangling him.