So, a few weeks ago, I said I would write a bagginshield fic for this post based on a game called Too Hot. The players kiss without touching each other. The first one to touch the other loses and the winner gets to make the loser do whatever they want. I was going to make this smuttier but Thorin and Bilbo had different ideas. Ah well. Perhaps there will be a sequel
“This is a really stupid game,” Thorin grumbles, arms crossed tightly over his chest. He is not pouting, regardless of the look he is receiving from Dwalin. He hates that look. Almost as much as he hates this stupid game.
“You were laughing along with everyone else at Kili only two seconds ago,” his friend reasonably reminds him, which only makes Thorin glower harder. Kili makes a token sound of protest to his right but he ignores it.
“Because he lasted two blasted seconds before he had his hands all over the girl!” he protests because it was funny. Of course, Kili is completely drunk off his arse and can’t keep his hands off his girlfriend on a normal day. Thorin suspects Tauriel knew she was going to win when she agreed to play. After, when Fili asked her what she is going to make Kili do, she just smiled a sharp, predatory smile and said,
“Dinner with my step-father. In a tux and on his best behavior,” to which everyone cringed. Or laughed hysterically, in Fili’s case. Everyone knows how intimidated Kili is by Thranduil. Perhaps it doesn’t help that Thranduil has arrested him more than once, a fact that no one is going to forget any time soon. Or that he threatened Kili when he and Tauriel started dating. Also more than once. Thorin just hopes his nephew survives the dinner.
Actually, Thorin wants to survive tonight, speaking of surviving things.