Advice For People Making Positivity Posts About Trans Guys
cw: mention of biological sex characteristics
Use the word “period” for the love of god… we have dysphoria for a reason? Mentioning the thing that women do is triggering as fuck because it makes us remember what’s going on down there and what our bodies do and we don’t want to remember this, at all. We’re not meant to be doing that, so just stop.
Refer to our CHEST as “breasts”. Again, this is triggering as fuck. None of us want to be reminded of the fact that we have breasts. Stop using female terms to refer to our body, please. Yes, our body is what it is and we do have a female body we know this, we’re not indenial, but using terms that are commonly associated with women when we are not women is not okay. Just stop.
Use the word “chest”
Call our private parts “vagina”… oh my god. Why does this need to be said, really like, why would you even say that at all. I honestly can’t say anything that I haven’t already said.
Use “down below”/“privates/private parts”/“penis”/“bottom area”
PUT ATTENTION ON OUR BODY PARTS. We don’t want to hear things like “to the guys with big hips”, “to the guys with feminine/high voices” and “to the guys with curves" etc. It is just focusing on the fact that our body is this way and we’re trying as much as possible to make our body what it should be.
These things are all examples of social dysphoria that can trigger sex dysphoria. Please. I’m on T and this shit still annoys me because I remember seeing this all pre-T and it made me so dysphoric. You’re just hurting other guys. Words are words, true, but they still hurt especially when we have dysphoria about these parts. Guys don’t want to come across a post that’s meant to make them feel good, read the first line and it says “To the guys with large breasts you are valid!” get that out of here! You are being so inconsiderate to what we suffer with and if you are trans, maybe tone it down and think about other people?
Reminder: we are not women, so stop talking about our parts in female terms.
Before I get that one person, obviously if you are speaking medically/giving medical advice then yes, there is no way around this but any other time, work around it. I’m sorry if this post has come across harsh but legit, it needs to be said.
So I was just sitting around and thinkin’ about Shane (as you do) when I thought of something, and turned it into something more. I just have a lot of feelings my dudes, I gotta let them out.
When the farmer needs to be cheered the heck-a-rooney up (bachelors only):
Alex - He will scoop you up in his arms, hold and squeeze you for as long as you need. When you’re feeling a little better, he’ll drag you (and doggo if you’d like) out for some fresh air on a walk to the beach and, if sunny, a refreshing dip in the sea. How can you be sad when the man you love is grinning widely as he playfully splashes you, and howling with laughter as you move drenched hair out of your eyes, pretending to be mad before you do the same to him? You can’t.
Elliott - He will whisper sweet nothings in your ear, reminding you how special you are, how amazing and important you are, and, of course, how beautiful and/or handsome you are. The more he continues, the less serious and more ridiculous the compliments get. He won’t stop until you’re blushing furiously, laughing and begging him to stop.
Harvey - He will be a little unsure the first time he sees you like this, but quickly snaps out of his hesitation to help you. This man will sit you down, and immediately start rubbing your back, relaxing your muscles and relieving tension. He’ll also sneak in some neck, shoulder and back kisses as his hands do the work. He’s there to listen if you need to let it all out, he would never complain, he hates the thought of you bottling everything up inside.
Sam - He will hold you as you rest in his arms, and softly sing to you. Eventually, when you’re feeling better, he will be sat on the bed, back against the headboard, and you between his legs, with his chin on your shoulder as you play guitar together, his hands over yours, plucking the strings together. If it’s a more low-key sadness, he’d probably show you dumb memes he finds funny, or he’d send you this
Sebastian - “hey wanna see this cat video?” … but if the sadness is beyond cat videos, he will do his best to comfort you, despite feeling a little awkward, unsure of how to handle your emotions, he does his best, listening to everything you need to say. He might even take you out on his motorbike, taking a spontaneous trip to just about anywhere. The sharp and familiar wind flowing through your hair as you two sped down the road is enough to ease your troubles.
Shane - He would either lay in bed with you, your head on his chest whilst he lazily draws circles and traces the small details/marks/scars on your body he loves so much. Or he would carry you to the chicken coop and childishly play around with you, giving the chickens voices and telling stories about them. “This one time, Mr. Cluck-a-thon escaped the pen and robbed a bank, no lie”.
Theo would open jars for Liam. Not because Liam can’t get them open himself but in the process of opening a stubborn jar, he gets so frustrated and pissed off he breaks it. So now he just hands Theo the jar without even needing to say a word and Theo does it for him. Usually with a smug grin but he does it.
(Isak and Even make out, Sana enters the classroom)
Even: Hi! So, uh…when do you finish today?
Isak (off screen): But I think I’ll stay a while longer…Get some help with homework. So many tests these days.
(Sana gets a text from Vilde)
Vilde: Hi! We can come and have a look at the bus on Friday at 15:00. It’s great because most buses have already been sold so this might be our only chance! This is what we’ve dreamed about!
Even: Can’t you just practise at home?
Isak: I’m not able to practise at home.
Isak: I can’t practise at home when you’re there.
(Sana texts back to Vilde)
(Isak and Even speaking: sorry can’t catch this..!)
(Sana’s phone buzzes and she picks it up)
Isak: Yes..! When you look at me and stuff..
Even: But I promise I won’t look at you.
Facebook: Yousef Acar has sent you a friend request Isak: Then what’s the use, Even? For me to practise at home if you don’t look at me?
Even: That’s true..
(Sana checks out his profile, then immediately gets a message from him)
Even: Is this the way it’s gonna be? That you’re out working and I just sit at home waiting for you?
Facebook message from Yousef: Thought of you when I saw this. (GoT pic with caption: Who run the world? Russegirls.) Fuck haters, you go girl
Isak: It’s not weird that I work a lot, I’m thinking about our future together. One of us does need to-
Even: Watch what you’re about to say..!
Isak: -have income.
Even: An income? Yeah, but it doesn’t mean that you’ll get a good income by attending school.
Isak: What’s the logic there?
Even: Well, just look at all the..the richest people in the world dropped out of school.
Isak: That’s like one person.
Even: At least-
Isak: It’s Al Gore.
Isak: Anyone who drops out is like “Did you know Al Gore actually didn’t go to school much? And he got rich! So I’m just not gonna go to school and become just like Al Gore!”.
Even: Bill Gates, Steve Jobs..
Isak: Bill Gates? Al Gore..(inaudible)
(Sana looks at Yousef’s pictures, lost in her thoughts. After a while students starts entering the classroom, Even walks by Sana to leave.)
Isak: Who’s that?
Isak: Isn’t one of those guy’s name Mikael, or something?
Isak: Mikael…How do you know them?
Teacher (off screen): If everyone could quiet down so we can start the lesson.
(Sana gestures to Isak to keep quiet and listen to the teacher. Isak looks at her while she ignores him.)
I’ve probably missed a lot, I’ll try to come back and “listen for it” later, don’t have time now. But hey! Things are getting interesting, no? Maaan I’m wondering where this is going..! And what a cute mirror of Isak in season 3 <3
look i’m no expert but i think the lgbt+ community needs to stick together and stop it with whatever gatekeeping bs is going on. there’s always going to be some intracommunity fights and ~*discourse*~, sure, but recent events are a horrifying reminder that nobody wants to be lgbt+ just for fun. please stop it with the ‘you need to be thiiis gay to ride’ mentality. there is no official community registration or badge or stamp. if you’re young and confused and need a place to belong, you do. if you’re aro and/or ace and feel excluded everywhere, you shouldn’t be. if you’re intersex or if your gender is being weird, you’re not alone. as for allies, here’s a reminder they used to be (and may still be) human shields, and that many allies might actually be closeted lgbt, or questioning, and it’s a safe way for them to access the community. ally is a title that is given, not taken, and i’ve seen some bad self-proclaimed allies around, but there’s no need to make the community unsafe for anyone.
we can’t afford to fall apart. we need to take care of each other because we’re all hurting in some way. there’s a quote from the time of the norwegian tragedy five years ago that goes ‘if one man can show this much hate, imagine how much love we can show together’