does he think he's captain america

as well as being a trans superhero here have some ADHD peter parker things:

- *vlogging in the middle of fighting the avengers* “I JUST HAD A FIGHT WITH CAPTAIN AMERICA AND I STOLE HIS SHIELD AND I THREW IT AT HIM AND I - what the hell, he’s big now-”

- cannot sit still for more than 5 mins in detention once another idea has crossed his mind

- h y p e r f o c u s

- has lost multiple backpacks bc he cannot remember which alley he left them in

- *on the ceiling* *still does The Leg Bounce*

- constantly breaks off mid-sentence when he’s thinking about something and forgets what he was talking about in the first place

-  jumps from project to project whenever he gets a new idea and runs off impulsively when something catches his attention      

-  uses headphones as a stim/distraction to try and void sensory overload

- texts Happy all the time about his patrols as a way to process and order the information and doesn’t understand that Happy not replying is a snub

- was involved in multiple school clubs before spider-man to fill his time almost constantly  

- ‘want to help me build my lego death star? it has over 3,000 pieces’ ‘no way!’ *hyperfocuses on a puzzle to avoid his problems*

- impulsive speaking, no brain-to-mouth filter

- tony thinks peter isn’t paying attention to a Serious Lecture but really peter’s mind has just drifted to already trying to put the pieces together and work out the vulture’s plan 

- then hyper-sensitive to criticism and having tony take the suit from him, literally in tears telling aunt may that he lost the internship

- totally would say ‘I’m peter man - spider parker - fuck!’ 

exchanges (m)

Summary: In which Jeon Jungkook is that friendly neighborhood superhero, you’re the face in the hallway that saved his high school career, and he can’t ever seem to get a grip around you. Even when he makes you scream after a fated accident—not for the reason you may be thinking; get the thought out of your head! 
Pairing: Jungkook | Reader 
Genre: Fluff/Smut; Spiderman AU 
Word Count: 14,838
Author’s Note: Honestly though, it was only a matter of time before I got around to writing a story like this. I am obsessed with Spiderman, so this might just be the foundational guideline for many future Jungkook Spiderman AU drabbles to come in the future. 

The story was also heavily inspired by this photo that made me cry for seven days and seven nights. +photo credit !!!!!!!

.

(the present)

If Jeon Jungkook is against anything in his life, it’s one’s ability to exaggerate certain situations or problems to make those things seem much bigger than they probably were. Well, actually, take that back. It’s not that he’s against it per say, it’s just that his peer’s daily struggles of pop quizzes and missing the morning bus aren’t exactly headliner news—especially in comparison to what he has to go through.

Jeon Jungkook is against exaggeration, probably because he can’t get away with it himself. It’s not that he doesn’t like to exchange his fair share of embellished stories or fabricated events weaved into true experiences, it’s that he can’t afford to do so. Sharing stories of his nightly routines and dashing superhero adventures may seem great, but only if he could manage the burden of a personal life and a masked life intertwining.

As an 18-year-old boy, he can probably say it’s safe to assume that he cannot. Manage the overwhelming, opposite pressure both of his lives take him, that is. It’s difficult enough being a college freshman, a tiny fish in an ocean of whales and sharks, but throw in his late night Spiderman facade would be too much of a tale to share with other people and peers who probably ask too many questions and know too much about him. He’s never liked the exposure that comes with being in the spotlight, and he can’t hide behind his mask if people knew who he was.

Oh. Right. Speaking of his Spiderman facade, that’s who is he. Haven’t heard of him? You know, the dashing hero of Seoul, red and blue spandex attire with a web shooter, fine tuned senses and amazingly quick reflexes? The boy who swings around the city, volunteering for trouble and always coming out right on top? The boy who constantly maintains that casual, slightly amused tone throughout a majority of his rescues?

Yeah, well, that’s Jungkook.

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stevetrevvors  asked:

do u have headcanons/thoughts regarding the peter parker is trans idea bc i havent seen the movie but thats the best goddamn thing ive heard alllll day

  • may is his biggest supporter and fought super hard to get him everything he needed she actually popped a doctor in the face once for consistently misgendering pete
  • ned is also trans thanks 4 ur time
  • all the other boys in his class get embarrassed and flustered every time their voices crack but pete loves it more and more every time it happens to him
  • tony made the spidey suit with a bulge so peter doesn’t have to awkwardly stick his packer down there
  • ‘black widow’ and ‘hawkeye’ and ‘captain america’ r cool names n all but something is just always really great about people calling him ‘spider man’
  • he wears lifts in his shoes and so does tony and he’s completely gobsmacked when he finds out
  • he and ned host huge movie marathons and munch on popcorn and point out all the characters they think are trans
  • luke skywalker is The Trans Hero they both adore
  • his spanish teacher calls him señor parker and it makes him BEAM with happiness
  • he and ned go to the bathroom together bc Solidarity Bro
  • once he grew his hair out to try to “fit in” better but he hated it so much that he hacked it all off with those kids safety scissors and made a complete mess so ben had to buzz his hair right down
  • he and ned would practice deepening their voices for hours in pete’s room and end up ruining it by giggling
  • once he was doing his “stark internship” stuff and he missed his usual shot time so now he always makes time to do his shot properly
  • he loves how skintight the suit is bc he’s so Flat
Who says I love you first - Boyf Riends

• ALRIGHT ITS TOTALLY MICHAEL HOWEVER STUFF HAPPENS TO not bad stuff. It’s the cute stuff

• so basically they start dating after the whole squip fiasco, after dating Christine for two weeks Christine realizes that Jeremy likes Michael and that she didn’t like Jeremy as much as she thought so she decides to be Jeremy’s wing women for getting Michael

• Michael finds out they broke up and is ECSTATIC

• Eventually Christine runs up to Michael, shoves Jeremy into his arms and screams ‘THIS BOY HAS A HIGE FUCKING CRUSH ON YOU SO DATE HIM’

• Michael is confused, but takes him to Dave and Busters that night and they totally dominate every game (I might do a little head Cannon or one shot on this later )

• jump forward three weeks and Michael and Jeremy are in Jeremy’s basement playing video games together

•Michael looks over at Jeremy and stares at him, taking in his lovely little features and quirks

• he loves how Jeremy sticks out his tongue when playing a game, and concentrating v v v hard

• he loves when Jeremy’s eyes light up in amusement when Michael accidentally messes up

• he loves Jeremy’s snicker when this happens as well

• he loves when Jeremy pumps his fist in the air when they beat a level/ win a thing (yes I know video games(no, no I don’t))

• he loves - oh fuck he loves JEREMY

• Michael has a brief mental freak out

• he did just realize that he’s in love with the guy he’s known since he was little

• what Michael doesn’t realize is that Jeremy is also mentally freaking out cause he just realized that he didn’t just love

• Michaels soft hair

• Michaels slight accent

• Michaels joy in retro shit

• he loved Michael in general

• neither of them say anything for about two weeks, both thinking it’s to soon and WHAT IF THEY THINK IM WEIRD WHAT IF THEY THINK ITS TO GAY oh wait. We are gay.

• eventually, its late at night, the boyfs are once again in Jeremy’s basement, they’re watching a marvel movie cause Michael fucking loves marvel AND CAPTAIN AMERICA MMMM YES

• Jeremy has his head in Michaels lap, Michael is stroking his hair.

• half way through civil war, Michael leans down and kisses Jeremy’s forehead

• Jeremy just smiles up at him and Michael fucking M E L T S

• “God Jer, I love you.”

• Michael freezes when he realizes what he said

• Jeremy does too

• then he slowly whispers

• “Shit man, I was gonna say it first damn it.”

• Michael takes in a deep breath, slowly releasing it

• then he smirks

• “Well sucks to suck babe, player two has you beat”

• “okay well, I’m initiating the next mile stone so fuck you”

• and he does. When they’re 22 Jeremy asks Michael to marry him

• obviously he says yes

It was kinda short but yeah I got that idea last night. I always get my ideas at night

Send To All - Tom Hiddleston x Reader

Prompt: There’s this comedian called Michael Mcintyre who has a chat show and sometimes plays this game called “send to all” where he takes the guests phone and sends a mass text out then reads the replies out. It’s on you tube and hilarious but anyway i was wondering if you could do something where the reader is an actress on the show and agrees to play and he sends out a flirty text or something like that and she gets a few funny replies from Evans, Fassbender, Macavoy, Cumberbatch and TOM HIDDLESTON
Note: Okay so I went a bit mad with this one and did make a few adjustments, however 99% of it is what was asked for. This one is for the lovely @dohegotthesuperbooty - I’m sorry it took so long (I’m really behind!!) - for anyone who is interested, the video behind this idea can be found here.

Originally posted by letlovebyourenergy


You were stood at the side of the stage awaiting your cue; it was your turn to appear on several British chat shows to promote your new film. You were staring in a new rom-com opposite Tom Hiddleston; the two of you had become very close over the last course of shooting the film, a fact that had purposely been left out of the media.

The show you were appearing on was that of comedian Michael McIntyre. All you could think about was his infamous game of ‘Send to All’. The producers had prepared you for the game; however it was up to the host as to whether or not you would be playing.

From centre stage, you heard Michael call your name. You began to walk over, the crowd went wild. Walking over to your seat, you waved to the audience. Once you reached the spot where Michael was stood, he gave you a friendly hug and welcomed you to the show. The two of you took your seats. Once the crowd had quietened down, he welcomed you to the show once again.
“So, welcome to the show!” He smiled.
“Thank you!” You said with a smile, “Thanks for having me, I’m a big fan of the show but I never thought I’d be sat here!” You exclaimed.

The interview was going extremely well, you were laughing and joking with both the audience and the host. Then he said those words you really didn’t want to hear.
“So we have a bit of a tradition on this show.” Michael began to laugh; everyone knew what he was going to say. “I like to play a lovely little game called ‘Send to All’ with my guests, are you up for a go?”
You started to think, what options did you have? If you were to say no… well, you’d only be forced to play to prove you had nothing to hide.
“Sure!” You said, a little too enthusiastically.
“Excellent!” Michael matched your tone. “The rules are simple, I’m going to come up with a message to send to all of the contacts in your phone and we’re going to leave it over the course of the show and then see who replies!”
“Great, can you just not send it to my mum” you laughed, as did everyone else in the studio.

“Okay, I think I’ve come up with the perfect message” Michael grinned.
“Oh no” you joked as you handed over your phone.
“Here goes…” Michael typed each word as he said it. “Hey, it… feels… like we haven’t seen… each other… in such a long time…” Michael stopped typing and looked over to you, he was giggling at the message he was typing. You on the other hand were using your laughter to disguise how red your face had become. “Why don’t we…” he continued to type “meet up… for a drink… or two?” Michael turned to you once again, “Do you use emoticons?” he asked.
“Probably too much” you responded.
“Excellent, how about little kisses?” he asked.
“Yeah, I guess, just one though. And always lowercase!” you added.
“In that case, I’ll add a little winking face and a kiss!” He looked up and addressed the audience. “Ladies and gentlemen, we have our text message!” The audience cheered. “Okay, here’s the message…” he paused and cleared his throat, “Hey, it feels like we haven’t seen each other in such a long time. Why don’t we meet up for a drink or two [question mark] [winking face] [kiss]” he laughed, as did the audience. You began to laugh but at the same time you were slowly bringing your hands up to your face to once again, cover up how red it was. “What do you think, shall we send to all?!” He asked the audience. They went wild. “It’s gone, sent!” Michael turned back around and walked to his seat to continue your interview.

You spent the rest of the interview trying not to think about the messages currently coming through to your phone. You had just about removed the thought from your mind when Michael said “Right, well there’s just one last piece of business we need to discuss before I let you go.” He paused while the audience reacted. “Let’s read out some of the replies to the text we sent from your phone shall we? Okay so the message we sent read ‘Hey, it feels like we haven’t seen each other in such a long time. Why don’t we meet up for a drink or two [question mark] [winking face] [kiss]’. Wow, okay so you’ve got a fair few replies here!” The audience cheered.
“Better than getting none I suppose” you joked.
“Right, first up we have Chris Evans ladies and gentlemen! Wait, is this Captain America Chris Evans or BBC Radio DJ Chris Evans?” he asked you.
“I don’t think I should answer that until you’ve read the reply,” you laughed “no it’s Captain America Chris Evans” you smiled.
“Well Chris replied with ‘Dude, we aren’t even in the same country right now! Count me in for next time though, we’ll all go out’ how nice is that! But what does he mean by ‘all’?
“Yeah, he’s a good egg!” you smiled, “I’m guessing he just means getting the old gang back together”
“Okay next up is… it looks like you’ve got the number of everyone who’s ever been in a Marvel film here!” the two of you laughed as he continued to look for the next reply. “I think we will go for this one next, James McAvoy.”
“Oh no!” you exclaimed as you brought your hands to your face, “This is going to be a bad one isn’t it!”  
“That depends what it means! It says ‘Are ye sure pal? You know what happened last time!’ then there’s one of those laughing and crying faces. What happened last time?” He questioned you.
You tried to contain the laughter, “nothing, nothing happened last time – at least nothing that you’re all probably thinking anyway! All that happened was a few of us had gone out and had far too much to drink, we all got a taxi and when it was my stop James helped me out of the taxi and then after insisting I was fine… I fell up the steps.” The audience and Michael laughed at your story, you chuckled, after all it had been quite funny.

“Wonderful, we have time for just a few more! Who’s next? ‘Benny C’ is that who I think it is?” you nodded in response. “We have to read this one! It says ‘Sorry not tonight, I’ve got my hands full. However you can both count me in next time!’ At least he’s up for the next time, but what does he mean by both?” he questioned you.
“Well a fair few people know I’m here tonight, he probably just knows it was you” you smiled.
“Hmm,” Michael looked as you quizzically.
“He is Sherlock Holmes after all,” you added “all that detective knowledge has to have rubbed off”
Michael agreed with you and moved on, “Okay, this is the last one now, let’s go for the man himself, your co-star Mr Tom Hiddleston ladies and gentlemen!” The audience cheered, some more excited than others as you heard several women let out high pitched screams.
Your face turned the brightest shade of red possible; you could only hope that he hadn’t said anything that would give the two of you away.
“Let’s see what he has to say shall we,” Michael cleared his throat, “’Darling, we spent six months together making a film and I’ve seen you every night since we got home. Shall I come and pick you up? x T’” Michael took a moment for everyone to process the message he had just read. “Well, well, well! It looks like you were hiding something after all. Anything you want to say?” He asked.
“No, not really” you responded, you could feel yourself getting warmer. You were debating whether or not to address it, although Tom had practically already made that decision for you and left you without a choice. In the end, you decided it was best to talk. “When you shoot a romantic film you spend a lot of time with your co-star and about sixty percent of that time you’re in quite an intimate position.” The redness was starting to disappear from your face, replaced only by a smile that suggested you were happily in love.

“Well ladies and gentlemen, it looks like the show is ending on a lovely note! Thank you to all of tonight’s guests and I’ll see you next week!”


(Part 2)

Look. I understand that the 616 stony fandom is all about pining!Tony, and that’s all good. I only know the MCU, though, and that’s different. In the MCU, pining!Steve is the real. Not only does Tony have a serious girlfriend who he really loves while Steve is pretty much defined by his loneliness, but the movies #confirm it. Consider:

  • Iron Man 1: no mention of Captain America
  • Iron Man 2: Tony has half of a replica Cap shield but it’s made clear he doesn’t think much of it.
  • Iron Man 3: even after meeting Steve, he isn’t mentioned at all in Tony’s movie. Tony is more interested in Pepper.

Meanwhile take a ding dang look at the Captain America movies:

  • The First Avenger: Tony isn’t born yet but Steve spends considerable time with Tony’s sperm donor.
  • The Winter Soldier: Tony is specifically mentioned like a dozen times and there’s some foreshadowing about a future conflict with (oh guess who it’s) TONY.
  • Civil War: Tony is. Literally? There. He’s the deuteragonist. The PRIMARY conflict is Steve dealing with the issues he has regarding his friendship with TONY STARK.

Like even if we take into account the fact that Tony IS the center of the MCU. The Thor movies do not focus on Tony this way. Incredible Hulk only had him as a cameo. Tony is a HUGE part of Steve’s story. SPECIFICALLY.


So anyway. That’s why I love pining!Steve.

  • *Avengers have been defeated by Thanos and are on the retreat*
  • Peter Parker: Guys, that really sucked. Does anyone have any-hey, who is that guy?
  • *the Avengers turn around and see Stan Lee*
  • Natasha: Yeah...I've seen him around.
  • Michelle: He lives at my apartment...don't look at me like that, I'm just observant.
  • Steve: He was the security guard at the Captain America exhibit...and one of my commanding officers back in WWII.
  • Bucky: I think I saw him during my mission in Somalia...which was in 1984 by the way.
  • Doctor Strange: That was the guy on the bus! When I was in the Mirror Dimension! What the hell!?
  • All the Guardians: SAME, WE LIVE IN FLIPPING OUTER SPACE AND WE KNOW HIM TOO!
  • Thor: Who are you!? Reveal yourself to the son of Odin!
  • *Stan Lee clears his throat and his eyes go black*
  • Stan Lee (voice heavily distorted): Greetings Avengers and Guardians. It is I...Uatu the Watcher. I've been waiting for this moment for a long time.
Rotten Judgement - part 6

AU!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Hercules!AU After selling your soul to save your lover’s life, you become one of the Lord of the Underworld’s slave. Bucky is obsessed with one thing: collecting hearts. But why?

Word Count:2,052

Warnings: the usual + Torture, Blood, Death

A/N: I hate warnings, they spoil all the fun… Sorry, I don’t know what’s going on in my brain, but I enjoy drama lol Enjoy, lovely cupcakes :)

Rotten Judgement - Masterpage

Two weeks after you last saw Bucky, you were getting ready for your meeting with Sam and his team when you heard a lot of giggling and chattering in the hallway. You rolled your eyes, recognizing the voice of the two Furies.

“What do you want?” you asked defensively as you swung the door open.

“Missed us?”

Wanda pressed her cheek against Nat’s and they both gave you their best innocent smile. When you didn’t answer, they bat their eyelashes at you.

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Sam Wilson was an NCO, not an officer

Have to get this off my chest, because I see Sam called Major a lot.

Pararescueman (Sometimes called Parajumpers or PJs) in the USAF, which we’re told Sam was, is an enlisted position. Sam Wilson was a non-commissioned officer - I’m gonna guess he was at least a Sergeant and given the level of specialised training, probably a Staff Sergeant.

Pararescuemen have officers - they are called Combat Rescue Officers. They have most of the same training (though not all in as much detail) plus officer/strategic training. The idea is that the PJs are the detail guys (concentrating on individual casualties) the CRO keeps a wider, coordinating view, so doesn’t (or at least tries not to) get tied down with his hands stuck in somebody’s guts. I don’t think it is very likely a CRO would be strapping on a wingsuit, but in any case if Sam says he was Pararescue that means by definition that he was an NCO.

(Why does this bother me? Because while I think for most writers it’s a well-meant ‘well he was brave and important, must have been an officer’ that’s ignoring the many highly trained and skilled people who can be found among the NCOs. Making Sam an officer may feel like valueing him up, but it’s also kind of valueing NCOs down)

arwenxs  asked:

Hi! For the prompts, I don't know if you've done this before, but what about a Tony Stark advises for the young avengers? Because I really love the RDJ advises so I think that might be cool.

I SO FELL IN LOVE WITH THIS IDEA OMG I DECIDED I COULD NOT WAIT TO POST IT.

Also I interpreted “Young Avengers” as his new young Avengers, not the Young Avengers™ who don’t have a book right now. That may have been wrong, sorry D:

Title: Tony Stark Advises the Avengers
Rating: PG
Summary: Somehow, Tony Stark ended up Team Dad.
Notes: This is set nominally in the 616, where Ms. Marvel (Kamala Khan), Nova (Sam Alexander), and Spider-man (Miles Morales) are half of an Avengers team with Iron Man (Tony Stark), Captain America (Sam Wilson), and Thor (Jane Foster). 
More Notes: There is a text version following the image version for people who need plain text. Sorry there are two guys on this team named Sam, it’s not my fault. 

***

Ms. Marvel

(Image super heavy under the cut)

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Harmonies

[Part 1 I Part 2 I Part 3]

Relationship: Bucky x Reader

Summary: It’s the morning after you found Bucky playing the piano. And he’s really not very subtle about last night.

A/N: I was asked to write a part two and I didn’t plan on it until I had a surge of inspiration. This is long, I’m sorry. And it’s just straight up porn. Not sorry.

Warnings: Language, smut, fingering, hair pulling?, protected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids).

Words: 4918

Originally posted by moon-saph

A harsh knock pulls you from your sleep as you open your eyes drowsily. “Training room in 30 minutes” Steve calls before you hear his footsteps retreating. With a groan, you roll over to see its 7am and your head falls back on to your pillow with a sigh. Although you had a lot of fun, hell, it was infinitely better than you ever thought it would be, there was no denying today was going to be rough.

Drowsily grabbing your workout gear, you step in to your shower and wash away last night’s endeavours, your fingers lingering over the small bruise rising to your skin on your hip and you can’t keep the smile from your lips.

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  • <p> <b>The Avengers:</b> Tony' ego is too big.<p/><b>Also the Avengers:</b> Tony is solely responsible for every bad thing that ever happened ever™<p/><b>Clint:</b> including me being thrown in prison for breaking the law.<p/><b>Wanda:</b> including my parents death at the hands of rebels in my country.<p/><b>Everyone:</b> Including Ultron which was created by actual vilain Tony Stark, and Bruce Banner and the mindstone with strong influences from Wanda.<p/><b>Everyone:</b> Why does Tony think he's so important and powerful? Where does this ego come from? Why does he want to be held accountable? We don't understand.<p/></p>
I'm still the captain

(A/N): bearded Steve has got me fucked up

Request: Can I request a story please where Steve is sick of being Cap and doesn’t want to come back to the Avengers until he comes to the base to talk to Tony and he sees the reader who is a new recruit. The reader is training with a total asshole at that point who just keeps shooting something (idk fire or stuff) at her and she starts arguing with him, walks out and runs into Steve? And Steve falls in love and joins again? (Steve please with beard and maybe a dog or something) You’re so awesome!

Warnings: some swearing


Originally posted by b-n-a-o

   "You sure you don’t wanna come back?“ Tony asks as he walks beside Steve and his rather large golden retriever named Buddy of all things. 

    "I’m tired of being cap,” Steve sighs as he looks at the floor, at the floor he once used to walk on daily. “I’ve been doing it for years and I guess I’ve just lost-" 

   "Lost faith in captain america?” Tony supplies the rest of his sentence. Steve nods, sighing again. 

   "Captain stood for justice, peace, freedom, I don’t know what he is now but it’s not that,“ 

   "You piece of shit!” A sudden voice cuts Steve’s conversation short. buddy’s ears perk up and he whines at the sound, his head already pointing to the direction of the training rooms.

    “New recruits,” Tony supplies with a smirk. “It hasn’t been going to well," 

   "Yeah,” Steve edges forward, taking a few steps towards the training rooms. “I can tell,”

    “I’m done trying to train you! Reschedule with Tony or Nat or someone else you little asshat-” The voice cuts shorts when whoever it belonged to ran straight into Steve’s chest, grumbling and trying to push away. “Watch where you’re going-” The person looks up, face immediately going slack as they look up at Steve. “Oh my god, you’re- you’re Steve Rogers,” Steve chuckles lightly, nodding his head as he stuffs his hands in his pockets.

    “Indeed I am," 

   "I’m so sorry for running into you, I didn’t mean to-" 

   "Mr. Stark, I suggest you hire someone new because (Y/N) does a fucking terrible job,” A young trainee, only around the age of 19, comes walking out of the training rooms, looking rather rude and arrogant. (Y/N)- Steve assumed- gritted their teeth in restraint as they rolled their eyes, turning on the spot to face Tony. 

   "Tony, this little asswipe wouldn’t listen to me, he kept using those stupid fucking powers and-“ 

   "hey, hey, hey, both of you need to calm down, okay?” Tony looked between the two with a rather serious gaze. “Jason, Go hit the showers, (Y/N) go eat a carrot or some shit, I don’t care,”

    “But Mr. Stark-”

    “Now you two.” Tony rubs at his temples as the two walk away, glaring at each other darkly as they do. “I swear those two are going to be the death of me,”

    “When did you hire (Y/N)?" 

   "A week after you left,”

    “What do they specialize in?" 

   "A little bit of everything truthfully, they have quite the impressive resume,”

   "Hmm, any previous employers?“ 

   "They were an assassin for hire, they were their own employer,”

   "So, what’s their story? Villain suddenly becomes a hero? They accidentally lost a loved one in their line of work?“ 

  "They gave up the whole assassin thing after one customer wanted (Y/N) to take out a family, a pregnant woman, her husband, and their two other children," 

   "So, they have morals at least ," 

  "They do,” Tony smiles, clapping Steve on the shoulder. “You’d love them if you got to know them a bit, gives you the perfect reason to rejoin the team-" 

  "Steve’s rejoining the team?” Natasha smirks as she suddenly walks up to the two men. “Nice beard Steve, makes you look all rugged and stuff," 

    "He does live on a farm now Nat, he has to look rugged,” Nat hums as she nods, her eyes flitting from Steve’s bear down towards his feet where Buddy sat patiently, tail swishing from side to side gently.

    “And who’s this cutie?” Nat asks as she crouches down, scratching Buddy’s ears affectionately.

    “This is buddy, I found him snooping around my yard one day and I decodes to take him in," 

   "Well sounds like Captain America has been having fun up on his ranch,"  

   "Yeah,” Steve nods, smiling gently as he does.  "I have…I miss the compound though,“ 

   "Ah, did I just hear Captain America say he misses the compound,” Tony smiles excitedly, unable to hide just how elated he was.

   "I’m not saying I’ll come back, I’m just saying I’ll think about it,“ 

   "He’ll think about it!” Tony cried as he hugged Steve tightly. “He said he’ll think about it!”  


  “Remember how you said you’d think about it?” (Y/N) chuckles around a mouthful of ice cream, the chocolatey substance dribbling down their chin. “And cut to a year later you’re the team leader once again," 

   "Oh hush,” Steve muttered as he poked (Y/N) with his foot, too tired to even lift his arms. He’d been training all day with (Y/N) and needless to say they had kicked his ass, they were fucking amazing at fighting and Tony wasn’t exaggerating when he said (Y/N)’s resume was quite extensive. 

   "Tell me again why you came back,“ 

   ”(Y/N), I’ve told you a million times before-“ 

   "I know, but I love hearing why,” Steve sighs as he cracks an eye open to look at (Y/N) who was trying to look cute and innocent as they pulled the chocolate coated spoon out of their mouth.

    “I came back because I had a crush on you, I wanted to see you more," 

   "Yeah?” (Y/N) smirks as they recline onto Steve’s chest, his arms already coming up to wrap around their form. 

   "Yep…and because of that decision I found the love of my life-“ 

   "Oh, you’re such a sap,” Steve smiled as he pressed a kiss to (Y/N)’s temple, letting his lips linger there for a moment before pulling back.

   "You know you wanted to hear it, don’t even deny it,“ (Y/N) hums as they nuzzle into Steve’s neck, sighing softly once they found they were perfectly comfortable.

   "I suppose you’re right…” The two fell silent for awhile after that, just laying together, holding each other, listening to the other’s breathing, their heartbeat, the way (Y/N)’s breaths became shallow whenever Steve gently kissed them, or the way Steve would nearly purr when (Y/N) raked their hands through his hair. The moment was peaceful, reflective, absolutely wonderful, that was until there was a loud bark and suddenly there was a large, rain soaked dog standing on both of their bodies. 

   "Buddy!“ Steve chastised, trying to push to large dog away from himself and (Y/N). "Personal space big guy,” But Buddy didn’t listen, instead he merely plopped down on their legs, head resting on Steve’s chest. (Y/N) chuckled as they reached down to pet Buddy, a light smile to their lips as they did.

    “He just wanted to cuddle too,” Steve groans and shakes his head as he lays back down, arms rewrapping around (Y/N). 

   "He’s fucking soaked (Y/N), your legs are going to be freezing when he gets off and then you’re gonna do that evil thing where you wrap your legs around me and try to freeze me to death,“

   "Hmm, damn right I am,”

   "I didn’t become team captain to have fucking freezing legs,“ 

anonymous asked:

I'd LOVE if you could write a drunk Simon confessing his feelings to Jace when he drives him home! Especially if it's super fluffy!

yeeeeeeee i love Drunk Shenanigans!!! 

“So this is what you do when I don’t go out with you?” Jace asks, huffing warm air over his fingers. It’s freezing, and he forgot his gloves, because he rushed over here to pick up one Simon Lewis from trying to get back to the apartment they share while drunk as hell. 

“Don’t get mad at me, I made good choices, did good things!” Simon says, pouting prettily as he tilts his head back and looks up at Jace. He’s slumped against Maia and Clary, who are quietly giggling to themselves. 

“He did - ‘good things’ is the cute blonde back in there!” Maia sniggers, and Jace feels his heart break a little more. He scowls, trying to get over the tiny pang in his chest. He’s long since accepted that Simon doesn’t feel the same way as he does, but it still fucking sucks because the guy he likes is the guy he lives with, and the guy who’s made it his mission to insert himself into every part of Jace’s life. 

“I didn’t do him.” Simon insists. “I was gonna, but he’s verrrrrrrrrrrry.”

“Very what?” Clary asks, leaning forward. Jace sighs and pushes her back as she begins to topple off the bench. 

“Very.” Simon agrees, and Jace raises an eyebrow. He’s about to press for more information, when Magnus appears. 

“Oh, finally.” He groans. “Take Simon home, I’ll deal with the girls.” 

“What did you guys drink?” Jace asks, exasperated as Maia nearly punches him in the face in her haste to cling to Clary. 

“We had a competition, and I severely underestimated their tolerance.” Magnus sighs, massaging his temples. “Come along, darlings.” Maia and Clary stumble off with Magnus, and Jace tugs Simon upright. 

“You good, man?” He asks quietly. Simon hums quietly and leans into Jace’s side. 

“Not gonna be sick or anything.” He confirms, and Jace laughs softly, slinging an arm around Simon’s shoulder and steering him to the car. 

“I’ve drunk enough with you to know what you’re like.” Jace muses. “And I am so glad you’re not the kind to throw up. I would not let you within ten feet of my car if you were.” 

“What kind of drunk am I?” Simon asks brightly, then promptly slips on the sidewalk and crumples, holding on to Jace’s arms for dear life. Jace sighs and hauls him back up, and suddenly Simon is very close, close enough to count each eyelash fluttering over warm brown eyes. 

“Clumsy.” Jace says hoarsely, transfixed by the hazy desire clouding Simon’s eyes, before he remembers that Simon is fucking drunk, and he sighs and steps away. “Come on, Lewis.” 

He manages to get Simon into the car with minimal fuss. Simon does try to convince Jace that North Dakota doesn’t exist, but it’s not even the biggest conspiracy theory Simon’s brought up, so Jace isn’t worried as he starts up the car and peers behind him, backing slowly out of the parking space. 

“Oh my god you’re driving.” Simon says suddenly. Jace snorts as he waits patiently for a gaggle of teens to cross the street. “Since when do you drive?” 

“Since a month ago, you went with me to get my license.” Jace mutters. “You’re such a dumbass when you’re drunk.” 

“Let me out, Jace is gonna kill me with his driving!” Simon moans, sinking low into his seat. 

“Rude.”

“I’m gonna dieeeeee.” Simon warbles, and then pauses. “Do you have any water? Or can we stop by the ocean to get a drink?” 

“Yeah, I don’t think the Atantic is what you need right now.” Jace says, reaching behind with one hand and grabbing the water he’d thrown in the back seat when he’d heard Simon was drunk. 

Lifesaver.” Simon says gratefully as he takes the bottle and twists the cap off, guzzling it down. He only gets one tiny dribble of water down his chin, and Jace glances over as the car idles at a red light on an empty street. 

“You’ve got a - “ He gestures, and Simon frowns. 

“A printer?” He asks, excited. Jace shakes his head, bemused. 

“Why the fuck would there be a printer?” He asks, glancing once to check that it’s still a red light before he reaches over and swipes his thumb over the drop of water, Simon’s stubble rough under his skin. “There.” 

The light changes to green and he drops his hand back to the wheel, focusing on driving - Simon’s partially right, Jace isn’t the best driver - and there’s silence in the car until he looks back to Simon, worried about the lack of unstoppable rambling. 

Simon is looking at him with a strange, unreadable look on his face, his eyes dark and stormy. Jace frowns and opens his mouth, about to ask what’s wrong, when Simon blurts out, “Do you know Jace Wayland?” 

“Oh my God.” Jace says, shaking his head. “Not this again.” Simon has a habit of conflating Jace and Captain America while he’s drunk, which is cute, but so not helpful. 

“If you see him,” Simon continues, his voice turning a little sad, “can you tell him to kiss me?” 

“What?” Jace asks, not at all proud of the way his voice goes an octave higher. 

“I mean, you’re Captain America. He has to listen to you, right?” Simon asks as Jace tries desperately to focus on pulling into their building’s garage. 

“Buddy,” Jace gets out in a strangled voice, “I think Jace Wayland doesn’t need me to tell him to kiss you.” 

“Did he say something? Does he not want to?” Simon asks, insistently patting Jace’s arm. 

“No.” Jace says shortly, killing the engine and opening the door. 

“Then you should command him. Jace would listen to you, you have muscles!” 

“Oh my God.” Jace groans as he gets Simon out of the car. He staggers a little as Simon leans in with all his weight. “Why is drunk you so horny?” 

“I’m not horny, I love him!” Simon declares. Jace promptly drops Simon. “Ow.” Simon complains from the floor. 

“Lewis. Always complicating things.” Jace says, his heart beating faster and a smile creeping onto his face despite himself. 

“I’m serious, he’s adorable and he cares so much and he’s so good to the world.” Simon says as Jace hauls him off the ground. “Please get him to kiss me.” Jace’s heart clenches and he smiles giddily at Simon. 

“Wake up sober, and I will.” He promises, and Simon nods sleepily, nuzzling into Jace’s neck. 

(The next morning, Jace waits as long as it takes for Simon to stumble into the kitchen and blearily make himself a cup of coffee before he backs the other man into the counter, gets a hand in his shirt, and kisses him as thoroughly as he can. Simon whimpers, his hands flailing for a bit and hitting Jace’s head before settling around Jace’s back, and then he gets with the program, pressing back and sliding his tongue across Jace’s. 

“Got a message from Captain America.” Jace murmurs when they break apart to breathe, his voice low and amused as he watches the bright red flush overtake Simon’s cheeks. 

“Oh God.” Simon groans. “Of all the idiotic things I’ve done - “

“I love you too.” 

“ - that was probably not the worst.” Simon concludes, his smile turning blindingly bright. Jace laughs warmly at that and reels Simon in for another kiss, unable to help himself. The guy he’s in love with is nerdy as fuck, but it’s the sweetest thing in the world, and Jace will send the creator of Captain America a fruit basket if it makes Simon happy.)

lactosefreepussy-deactivated201  asked:

Please write those 24356643 meta posts on post Azzano Bucky!!!! I wanna get sad!!!

Let’s start with one!!! But when??? There’s so much to think about and see with post-azzano Bucky and it’s only because Sebastian is truly great. I’m gonna pick my favorite and start with The Bar Scene

are you sad yet? Because I am.

Keep reading

If there’s one thing I hate more about the MCU fandoms continuing analysis and dissection of Civil War than the constant need by anti Tony stans to twist his actions and motivations to make him look like a bad guy, it’s this bizarre insistence that there has to be a bad guy other than Zemo. Not just in a ‘this side is ideologically wrong‘ sense, but in a sense that the MCU fandom just can’t handle the idea of a superhero movie where the protagonists disagree with, argue and fight each other without turning one of them into the antagonist.

For one thing, it shows how shallow fandoms can be and how fandoms never seem to acknowledge nuance as a thing in movies, TV shows or whatever else. For example, Kylo Ren is a deeply disturbed character who seems to want to be as evil as he can be to live up to his grandfather to the point of killing his own father to impress Snoke. But the fandom seem to either reduce to him to just an emo version of Vader or, worst of all, make him out to be a Zuko type anti hero who is totally redeemable and should totally get together with a girl who he tortured. Yeah, that kind of ‘analysis‘ bugs the hell out of me.

Mainly because it undermines what makes Civil War such a great movie. That being: both Steve and Tony have their points, but whose arguments and actions for most of the movie are driven more by reactionary emotion than any kind of logic or sense of the greater good.

Tony tries his best to do what’s best for what he sees as the greater good mainly out of personal guilt and PTSD eating away at him more than anything else. Eventually leading to the ending where Tony’s damaged psyche finally snaps from emotional agony. He does keep trying to do the right thing, but mainly to finally shake off a sense of guilt he’s never been able to deal with.

And Steve doesn’t do much better. Yes, at first, his motivations seem logical. His reasons for saying no to the Accords are personal, but they have logic behind them. But  he’s driven mostly by emotion the moment Bucky enters the picture. And I’ve already made another post about this, but I cannot stress this enough: Captain America in this movie is doing what he’s always done: what he believes is right and damning the consequences. He will follow orders, but if thinks his orders are wrong, he will disobey them and he will fight the system if he thinks it’s wrong. That’s what he does here. Only here, not only does that not solve anything, it makes everything worse. He gets Rhodey crippled, he breaks Tony’s heart, Bucky goes under cryosleep again, and most of the Avengers are now fugitives. All because of Steve.

TL;DR Neither Steve nor Tony were the bad guys in Civil War. They were on the opposing sides of a political debate that got out of hand because both of them let their emotions get the better of them.

A Study in Hypocrisy #2.5

Or why the Avengers’ relationship to Tony was unhealthy at best, Steve isn’t fit to be a leader, and why I’m Team Iron Man to the end.


WHY TONY’S RELATIONSHIP WITH THE AVENGERS IS UNHEALTHY AT BEST

Tony’s relationship with the Avengers has always made me uncomfortable. For the longest time, I couldn’t put my finger on why exactly, but I’ll try to organize my thoughts in this series.  

This post was getting far too long, so I decided to cut it into parts, one per Avenger. 

This is strictly MCU. I know nothing about the comics. 


CLINT

Tony doesn’t interact much with Clint in the movies, unfortunately, so there’s not a lot that can be said on that front.

Civil War gave us some interaction, however.

“The futurist, gentlemen! The futurist is here! He sees all! He knows what’s best for you, whether your like it or not.”

"Give me a break, Barton. I had no idea they’ll put you in here, come on.”

"Yeah, well, you knew they’ll put us somewhere, Tony.”

"Yeah. But, not some super max floating ocean pokey. You know, this place is for maniacs. This is a place for…”

"Criminals? Criminals, Tony. I think that’s the word you’re looking for. Right? It didn’t used to mean me, or Sam, or Wanda. But, here we are.”

“Because you broke the law—”

"Yeah—”

"I didn’t make you—”

"The law. The law. The law. The law. The law.”

“You read it, you broke it. Alright, you’re all grown up. You got a wife and kids. I don’t understand. Why didn’t you think about them before you choose the wrong side?”

"You better watch your back on this guy. There’s a chance he’s gonna break it.”

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Remember this part? How Clint refuses to admit that his situation is his own fault? He puts all of the blame squarely on Tony’s shoulders, as if the man was all-powerful and controlled the UN, Ross, and so on. I know Tony’s influential, filthy rich and powerful, but he’s still a private citizen. The Accords weren’t his doing, nor was the UN or Ross’ actions. At this point, he’s just desperately scrambling to keep them all alive if not free. 

Clint coddles Wanda like she didn’t give everyone—including Natasha, who he’s supposed to be super close to—horrible visions and triggered Tony so he would create Ultron. She was the source of the entire mess, and a mind-controller. Shouldn’t he hate her on principle after what Loki did to him, instead of considering her like a daughter of sorts? Also… what? I mean, she’s 26. She’s not a kid. She’s a grown woman, thank you. Maybe he feels guilty for what he perceives as getting her brother killed, but it’s still not an excuse. 

Going as far as to use Rhodey’s near-death as a weapon against Tony was also particularly low, especially when Tony wasn’t even the one to involve him in this mess at all—and had nothing to do with Rhodey’s fall either.

Tony didn’t call him for a reason—or three: it’s spelled Laura, the kids and retirement. Clint should never have been involved. He chose to come of his own volition. He probably didn’t even read the Accords. When Vision urged him to consider his actions, he replied “considered” in half a second, in a derisive tone that implies there won’t be any consequences. Because he’s an Avenger, and he’s on Captain America’s team, right? He can’t be wrong here.

Here’s how I interpret it. Clint’s not a leader. He’s a follower. He’s a foot soldier, a field agent. He doesn’t consider the consequences of his actions, because other people usually do it for him. SHIELD, at first. Then Tony and maybe even Steve after the fall of SHIELD. But he’s never actually had to deal with his choices before. There was always someone else there to take responsibility, divert attention or just deal with the aftermath.

Yet here he is, in prison. Considered a dangerous criminal. He doesn’t know when he’ll get back to his wife and kids. If he’ll get back to his wife and kids. And he can’t accept that it’s all his fault. So he blames Tony, even though he’s probably been living on his resources since the fall of SHIELD. I think this also might have something to do with the fact that Steve has a much better public image going for him. His legend has him as a paragon of American virtue and honesty, right? He does the right thing, that’s what he does, as if he were some sort of mystical creature with an infallible moral compass. No one would call Tony a moral compass, that’s for sure. 

Clint, like Natasha, like Coulson, like so many others, just got pulled in by the legend, I think. And then he turns on Tony when things go wrong, because he followed Captain America. He can’t have chosen the wrong leader, can he?  

i promised a lovely anon some bi trans leo headcanons and what better day than on trans thursday? beware, they are… a bit sad. i got carried away;

1) he figures it out from a relatively young age, mostly because of his “tia”, who keeps referring to him by he/him and using male titles for him (she knew the prophecy about him after all). it always feels right, and after a while, his very smart and amazing mom notices and starts calling him mijo instead of mija without being asked. it makes him happier, though its one of those things he appreciates much, much more later in life

2) thanks to his garbage extended family and the foster care system, his self-esteem and sense of self-worth is shot and he gets a kind of heavy dysphoria he never felt before. any kind of sga he had felt starts to get repressed; real guys like girls, right?? real guys are macho. real guys are cool. leo is small and skinny until he isnt so small and skinny in some parts and it hurts.

3) things get better when he meets piper. piper boosts his confidence and, being trans herself, offers him advice and council he doesnt think he could get anywhere else. he doesnt want it from anywhere else, either - she’s the best kind of friend there is. even if she has the strange and unearthly power to make him give her the good parts of his lunch…. seriously how does she do that…

4) ohhh so THAT’S how she does it… he thinks after a while at camp halfblood. he likes it here - he has something like family, and they just.. accepted him. called him their brother, called him son of hephestus, and he doesnt know how to handle it. it feels… strange. he likes it and he’s afraid od it all at once. he feels like he might have a home here, where he can be himself, be a man the way he was his mother’s mijo, her family, her son. he even thinks the guy who gave him the tour was trans, too. he never wants to leave, but he’s terrified to stay.

5) jason may not have been their friend for real, but he is now. it makes leo feel… guilty. jason is a good-looking guy, which makes leo jealous and… something else. something strange that he hasnt felt since he was little and he had his first crush on that boy he knew… he doesnt want it to happen again, but it does, and he cant help it. jason has pretty blue eyes and a nice laugh and hes the kind of tall and strong that makes you feel safe instead of intimidated. like a cross between superman and captain america. leo sighs to himself as he watches jason and piper slowly grow closer and thinks “and im his sidekick, lieutenant Totally Screwed”

akdhs i’ll have some more soon!!! trans leo is my jam (trans everyone is my jam, gonna rub my trans little hands over everything) so be prepared~