do you understand how huge this is to me

I just explained my issues with executive dysfunction to my dad and holy shit he gets it!


I described it like this: 

Imagine you’re back at AllPro(where he worked) with fifty phones and they’re all ringing. You want to answer them all because they’re all equal priority. That’s an environmental cue– phones are generally a ‘respond immediately’ cue.

Picking up a phone is a simple thing. You know it’s as easy as deciding which phone to answer and reaching out to pick it up, but your brain is saying “I must answer all of them!” The phones are ringing, and you can’t make your body reach out to pick one up because you don’t have fifty arms to reach out, you don’t have fifty ears to listen with, you don’t have a brain that can process and respond to fifty conversations and you don’t have fifty mouths that can all say different things all at the same time. 

Either you do it all simultaneously or nothing will happen. You can want to do it so bad it makes you cry, and you can’t make a decision because no choice seems like the right one. So the task stays unfinished and you get frustrated every time somebody reminds you to “just do it, it’s not that hard!” Because yes, it really IS that hard.

Now, if you had somebody who could point to which phone to answer, you can do it fine. That’s a prompt. Prompting removes the ‘middle man’ thought that says ‘do it all at once’ and gets you to focus on tasks one at a time instead of seeing them as some towering insurmountable mess.

Dad looked at me for a couple of seconds and said something to the effect of, “I didn’t know doing things were that hard for you.”

This is a major, major, major breakthrough between us because dad had it in his head that I left things messy because I didn’t care. While that’s crappy of him to assume, teaching him how that’s not the case and having him really understand it is a huge deal.

[Revised 2/17] Books for Witches, Diviners and Spellcasters

Hi, everyone. A while back (a long time ago, actually), I started an annotated bibliography on books about witchcraft and magick, and I’ve updated it once (last November). 

Since then, I’d been keeping a list of things I need to add to it, but didn’t get around to actually reworking and updating the list a second time until today. Largely because I can’t really go outside much today because of the smog. But anyways, here it is. I’ve also included divination-related books in this version, whereas previously they were separate.

I hope you find something on here that suits your fancy! Happy reading! Also, yes, I do want to do more book reviews on this blog, so if you’d like a longer review of one of the books listed below, let me know and I can write one.

For Absolute Beginners

Encyclopedia of Witchcraft, by Judika Illes. Even better than the Weiser Field Guide to Witches - this book is huge and chock-full of information. It’ll explain in easy-to-understand language how the concept has developed throughout time, why witches do what they do, and different types of witches.

The Weiser Field Guide to Witches, by Judika Illes. This gives an excellent look at the historical lore concerning witches, from the perspective of a witch herself. It’s kind of tongue-in-cheek, but it does have some information that won’t be found elsewhere.

The Modern Guide to Witchcraft, by Skye Alexander. Great book for those who’re really absolute beginners and are wondering what witchcraft is all about. Skye takes a very postmodern, utilitarian, and unfailingly honest approach, and it’s geared towards those of almost any belief system.

Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard, by Oberon Zell-Ravenheart. Attractively packaged and readible for almost all ages, this is a great (mostly) non-denominational look at the foundations of magical practice. It’s extremely detailed. Some of it only applies to Zell’s own tradition, but it’s quite useful, anyways.

Basic Techniques

Protection and Reversal Magick, by Jason Miller. This gets a little woo-woo at times, but he gives good advice on how to avoid serious problems that can come up as you begin to practice. Take with a grain of salt, though - some of this has the potential to make you feel paranoid.

City Magick, by Christopher Penczak. If you’re at all interested in tech witchery, or just want to practice magick within an urban setting, do check this out. It is by far the best look at the subject I’ve seen, and his discussion of urban tutelary spirits is worth the price alone.

Power Spellcraft for Life, by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. Nicely done, quite secular book providing basic beginner information regarding writing original spells and workings. It does fall prey to the trap of just listing correspondences with little information at times, but also contains a great deal of detail about ritual timing, raising power, and other topics essential for the beginner.

Sorcerer’s Secrets, by Jason Miller. This is a decent volume that describes a lot of techniques you don’t usually see in books, such as gesture and gaze-based magick. Be warned that Miller writes extensively about manipulative techniques, but it’s useful theory regardless of how you put it into practice.

Witch’s Bag of Tricks, by Melanie Marquis. This is not recommended for beginners, because the whole point of this book is to help existing practitioners refine and improve their already-established techniques. It’s got some novel ideas in it, and I like the author’s approach to symbolism in spellcasting.

Direct Magick (Energy Work)

The Un-Spell Book, by Mya Om. This non-denominational guide to working with magical forces is filled with useful exercises that go beyond the author’s previous work. I recommend reading this after reading Energy Essentials.

Instant Magick, by Christopher Penczak. Excellent beginner’s guide for those who don’t have access to a lot of fancy tools or prefer to work without them. This book won’t instantly teach you magick, but it will help even a seasoned practitioner find quicker, less-complicated ways of achieving results.

Energy Essentials for Witches and Spellcasters, by Mya Om. Though I balk at the use of the term “energy” to describe magical forces, this book is worth a look. It’s a bit like a workbook, with various exercises. Expect a lot of pseudoscience, though, and there are many religious references, but the techniques are solid.

Hedgewitchery and Astral Travel

Ecstatic Witchcraft, by Gede Parma. This is actually probably my favorite book on this subject, even though hedgeriding is only a part of what the book discusses. The only bad thing I can really say about this book is that it’s really not recommended for beginners, and it’s helpful to have the basics of visualization already mastered (for example) before doing the exercises Parma recommends.

By Land, Sky and Sea, by Gede Parma. This book goes into even greater details regarding different ways of conceptualizing the cosmology of hedgeriding, and I find it a very refreshing book that appreciatively draws from a number of different perspectives while grounding itself, so to speak, with the overarching metaphor of land, sky, and sea as the three worlds.

The Temple of Shamanic Witchcraft, by Christopher Penczak. Penczak is usually a pretty mixed bag, and this book is no exception. It gives a lot of good practical information and a very in-depth exploration of the three worlds (a useful concept), but it’s primarily framed by Wicca, so it might not resonate with those of other faiths and particularly those who aren’t pagan at all.

Ascension Magick, by Christopher Penczak. There’s a chapter or two in this that address alternate ways of conceptualizing the architecture of reality, and it’s pretty helpful for a hedgerider. Beyond that, this book is mostly about ceremonial magick, but it’s a (mostly) good book. Certain parts (such as the bit about UFOs) are a little off, in my opinion.

The Shamanic Witch, by Gail Wood. This book is really best suited for someone who practices Wicca and, besides the background info and cosmological descriptions, is really only useful in the context of that tradition. If you’re Wiccan or willing to pick around a lot of Wiccan-talk, though, this is a good foundation.

Witches, Werewolves and Fairies, by Claude Lecouteux. It can be hard to find scholarly works on these phenomena that are affordable, but here’s one I personally enjoyed. It details many accounts of journeying experienced by both pagans and Christians in earlier times, and gives a good description of the concept of the astral double, the architecture of the soul, and other topics throughout history.

Betwixt and Between, by Storm Faerywolf. This book is mostly a guide to the Feri tradition of witchcraft, but while I myself don’t practice that, those who do seem to know a lot about hedgeriding! The book has several chapters on the subject and is highly recommended for this reason.

The Psychic Energy Codex, by Michelle Belanger. A lot of people have strong opinions about this author, but this is book actually provides a lot of good information about so-called “energy work” which can be a step in the right direction for those wanting to ride the hedge.

Psychic Dreamwalking, by Michelle Belanger. In this book, Belanger discusses, essentially, how to use your non-waking life as a vehicle to for journeying, and while I myself don’t usually dreamwalk, much of what she says applies to hedgeriding in other states, too.

Hedge Riding and Hedge Witchcraft, by Harmonia Saille. I only mention these two in order to say that they’re best avoided. Saille tries to give a comprehensive look at the phenomenon, but it’s poorly-written and overly New Age. The negative reviews of them on Amazon really cover the problems with these book in more detail than I ever could.

Magical Writing, Words, and Symbols

Dictionary of Ancient Magic Words and Spells, by Claude Lecouteux. Mostly a historical text, this book isn’t exactly practical or terribly useful. It is, nevertheless, incredibly interesting. It’s a bit difficult to navigate, but worth a glance.

Composing Magick, by Elizabeth Barrette. A very general, but well-done, look at writing in a magical context. Some of the ritual templates are slightly specific to religious witchcraft traditions, but most information is widely applicable.

Crafting Magick with Pen and Ink, by Susan Pesnecker. Focuses both on the physical act of writing as a magical act, and the mental state associated with it. Highly recommended

The Modern Witchcraft Grimoire, by Skye Alexander. This book is for those who want to create their own grimoire. It gives fairly good advice for doing so, as well as providing hints and tricks for spellcasting and useful correspondences.

General Concepts

Planetary Magick, by Melita Denning and Osborne Phillips. If you want to work with the planets at all, particularly in a highly ritualized context, I recommend this book. It’s large, comprehensive and gives a good foundation beyond what you find in general astrology books.

Practical Planetary Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Shorter than I would have liked, but a useful reference to have on your shelf, with excellent tables and appendices in the back. The meditations are also quite useful.

Practical Elemental Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Should be read alongside the other book by this pair. Comprehensive guide to working with the elements in a ritualized fashion. Not as accessible to newbies as Lipp’s book, but good for seasoned practitioners.

The Way of Four, by Deborah Lipp. Though mostly geared towards Wiccans, I found this author’s in-depth treatment of the four elements highly fascinating. I will note that it’s probably best to get the print version of this book, as it contains exercises and quizzes.

Ingredients and Correspondences

The Herbal Alchemist’s Handbook, by Karen Harrison. I cannot praise this book enough for its concise and well-formulated approach to astrology, herbs, and magick as a whole.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Herbal Magick, by Judith Hawkins-Tillirson. This is excellent for anyone who’s interested in any kind of magick. Yes, the focus is generally herbs, but there’s a lot to be learned here about Kabbalah and other correspondence systems, as well.

Mixing Essential Oils for Magic, by Sandra Kynes. Fills a very difficult gap in published knowledge regarding the use of essential oils by discussing, in great detail, how scents interact with each other and how to create a formula that’s not only palatable, but evocative.

Dunwich’s Guide to Gemstone Sorcery, by Gerina Dunwich. Given the New Age fascination with all things shiny, it was quite a chore to sort through the myriad crystal books to find something with good information. While far from perfect and not exactly devoid of fluff, this book does give a level of detail about the lore surrounding gemstones not seen in many other texts.

Real Alchemy, by Robert Allen Bartlett. Excellent book, lots of history and detail. There’s a strong focus on tradition within the text, yet the author is quite accommodating of his audience and describes alternate methods that work better in a modern context.

Spagyrics, by Manfred M. Junius. With a highly-developed academic tone and attention to detail, this book is a meaty look at traditional alchemy. I recommend this more for intermediate practitioners due to the sheer density of information.

Spellbooks

The Goodly Spellbook, by Dixie Deerman and Steve Rasmussen. The title sounds horribly fluffy, but this is a hidden gem. It explains obscure concepts like alternative alphabets and potential uses of musical notes, as well as plant lore and other bits and pieces. Definitely worth checking out. It’s way more than just “a book of spells.”

Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells, by Judika Illes. The title sounds trite to some, but it delivers. This book has spells from almost every culture and spiritual philosophy, as well as a very detailed formulary. I read it when I’m bored sometimes, too, just because I always learn some tidbit from it.

Book of Spells, by Nicola Pulford. In most editions, this book is absolutely gorgeous and describes spellcasting traditions from a variety of perspectives and traditions. Recommended for those who already understand the basics, as this book jumps straight into spellcasting and gives only a small amount of information about how things work.

Ceremonial Magick

Modern Magick, by Donald Michael Kraig. I received this as a gift several years ago. It is essentially a workbook meant to be completed slowly, step by step, and while the format will not appeal to everyone, it’s a good easy-to-read introduction to ceremonial magick.

Familiar Spirits, by Donald Tyson. Though geared towards ceremonialists, any practitioner can likely learn a thing or two from Tyson’s interesting stroll through the whys and wherefores of spirit work and thoughtform creation. This is by far the best book I’ve seen on the topic of familiar spirits.

Secrets of High Magick, by Francis Melville. The most recent edition of this (the one I own) is lavishly-illustrated and full of rudimentary, yet useful information. He stresses the basics of ceremonial practice, and his writing style is very accessible. Highly recommended for absolute beginners.

My Life With The Spirits, by Lon Milo DuQuette. This is a memoir of a ceremonial magician, but it gives a good look at the magickal mindset in a highly developed form from someone who’s experienced quite a lot. I have major issues with DuQuette’s approach to Qabalah, but his memoirs are worth a read.

Chaos Magick

Liber Null and Psychonaut, by Peter Carroll. Classic book of chaos magick. I consider it required reading for almost anyone interested in the occult. Even if you have no love for chaos magick, do give it a read, just to understand how influential Carroll is, and why.

Hands-On Chaos Magic, by Andrieh Vitimus. Knowing some of the people involved in the creation of this book, I’m a bit biased towards it. That said, even if I didn’t know them, I would still recommend it. It’s especially interesting to read alongside Liber Null and Psychonautin order to see how the chaos “current” has developed over the years.

Pop Culture Magic 2.0 by Taylor Ellwood. There aren’t a lot of books on using pop culture symbolism in magick, but this one is nearly perfect. The author writes in a highly erudite, literate fashion, while still being accessible to newbies. Many useful resources cited, as well, so prepare to branch off a bit while reading it.

History-Related

Triumph of the Moon, by Ronald Hutton. An inside no-holds-barred look at the history of Wicca and Modern paganism. Highly recommended. This is sort of the book that fluffbunnies don’t want you to read.

Book of Lies: The Disinformation Guide to Magick and the Occult, by Richard Metzger. Lots of facts and history of magick in the context of Postmodernity. This is different from the Crowley text of the same name, which I wouldn’t recommend unless you want to focus on his tradition.

The Place of Enchantment, by Alex Owen. This is a purely historical text that documents the occult revival within the context of Modernity. I remember it being very good, but please realize I haven’t really picked it up much since graduating, and it might just have served my mindset at the time.

Tarot

The Book of Thoth, by Aleister Crowley. Make sure you actually own (or have access to pictures of) the Thoth deck before you dive into this. By far one of the best books on Tarot ever published. The prose is often dense and purple, but in this one book, Crowley teaches so much about Tarot and it’s connection to the Western Mystery Tradition. I can’t really say much more - it must be experienced.

The Pictorial Key to the Tarot, by Arthur Edward Waite. I recommend this book because it is a classic and was introductory for many older readers. It will teach you to read and gives insight into the methodology behind the Waite-Smith deck specifically, particularly his use of what are essentially parables and why he does this. Do not expect too much esoteric information, but read it anyways.

Seventy-Eight Degrees of Wisdom, by Rachel Pollack. This is the epitome of a good modern Tarot book and is really one of the first ones I’d recommend for someone looking for an accessible book on Tarot in a modern context. Very dense in information and history, yet altogether worth it. You’ll want highlighters nearby for this one!

Tarot for a New Generation, by Janina Renée. This is essentially a book for children and teenagers, but I do recommend it for them, specifically, because it is well-written, easy to understand, and helpful to absolute beginners.

Secrets of the Waite-Smith Tarot, by Marcus Katz and Tali Goodwin. This book focuses just on the history, symbolism, and creative process of the Waite-Smith deck. It gives you an inside line on just what Pixie Smith was thinking when painting specific scenes, and is a great look at her life’s work, as well.

The Tarot: History, Symbolism, and Divination, by Robert M. Place. This book will not teach you to read Tarot, but does give an actual, accurate portrait of the history of the phenomena, which is incredibly important and useful. Know your history.

Understanding Aleister Crowley’s Thoth Tarot, by Lon Milo DuQuette. I hesitate to recommend DuQuette due to issues I have with his approach to Qabalah, but many people ask me for a beginner book for the Thoth Tarot specifically, and this is the closest I’ve come to finding one. I recommend reading this alongside, and not instead of, Crowley’s Book of Thoth.

The Back in Time Tarot, by Janet Boyer. This is more for the intermediate reader, and the entire book details a single, extremely useful technique for familiarizing yourself with the cards, namely by framing past events in terms of how they might appear in a spread.

Lenormand

The Essential Lenormand, by Rana George. This was not the first Lenormand book I picked up, but it was the most influential and intense. Ms. George writes in a personable, touching fashion and brings the concepts of the system home by relating them to life experiences in a way rarely seen. She is one of those authors I literally go all “fangirl” over.

Learning Lenormand, by Marcus Katz and Tali Goodwin. This is one of the better beginner books on Lenormand. I’m not going to lie - it isn’t as good as Rana George’s, but it definitely is worth reading if you’re completely new to the system. It’s very accessible, where some of the books I’ll be listing later in this can seem intimidating, or so I’ve been told.

Lenormand: Thirty-Six Cards, by Andy Boroveshengra. This book is intense, but in a different way than Ms. George’s. Expect to be inundated with information and techniques. Another one of those where you really need to take notes or highlight while reading, and read it multiple times.

Secrets of the Lenormand Oracle, by Sylvie Steinbach. This book is organized in a novel and useful fashion by topic, and gives specific techniques for readings on love, money, spirituality, and other topics. Highly recommended, and I tend to use it as a reference book nowadays, looking things up as needed.

The Complete Lenormand Oracle Handbook, by Caitlyn Matthews. Not for the beginner, nor the faint at heart, this one details a lot of what, to me, seem to be more advanced approaches and techniques. I use this book a lot, and I think anyone else will enjoy it, too. Good information on the connection between Lenormand and traditional playing cards, too.

Cartomancy with Lenormand and the Tarot, by Patrick Dunn. This is more of a special topic book, and best read after you’ve got some familiarity with both Tarot and Lenormand. It’s all about using them in tandem and the synergy between them.

Astrology

The Luminaries, by Liz Greene. I could really recommend anything by this author, but she’s written so much, and this book is a particularly important one. It focuses entirely on the Sun and Moon in astrology, and gives a good look at why the luminaries need to have a special place in your understanding.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Practical Astrology, by Priscilla Costello. This is focused, as you might expect, on actual interpretation of charts and less on theory, but it gives a good background on that, too. Was quite helpful in my attempts to interpret @xepsurah‘s unusual natal chart.

The Complete Book of Astrology, by Kris Brandt Riske. Very beginner, and very light on intellect, heavy on intuition. A great introduction, but I would not suggest it as the only book you read if you’re really interested in the subject.

Tasseography

Tea Leaf Reading for Beginners, by Caroline Dow. There are only a few books within Llewellyn’s immensely popular “For Beginners” series that I would recommend, and this is one of them. The symbol glossary (which makes up the bulk of the book) is the most useful part.

Tea Cup Reading, by Sasha Fenton. This book goes into some detail (quite a bit, actually) about the history of tea and coffee, and, better yet, how to prepare them in the traditional fashion! A lot of traditional lore is described, as well.

Scrying, etc.

Scrying for Beginners, by Donald Tyson. This is really a surprise find, as I don’t usually expect much from this series, by Tyson knows his history and goes far beyond simple exercises for scrying. He is a bit biased towards mirror and crystal-gazing techniques, but does discuss other methods.

Psychic Development for Beginners, by William Hewitt. Readable, and offers some very practical developmental exercises for those wishing to hone extrasensory abilities. Be prepared to sort through a lot of woo, though.

AU MASTER LIST

So here is a bunch of AU’s that I’ve collected over…. a long time. Enjoy

Awkward Meetings

  • I broke your nose in a mosh pit, sorry
  • I hit you with my car and was the only one to visit you in the hospital, this is sort of awkward, are you okay?
  • You’re getting chased by the police and you just jumped in my car and yelled drive, wtf man
  • You just punched me in the face while gesturing wildly to a friend, your friend can’t stop laughing and im too shocked to respond to your apologies
  • You laughed in a restaurant, but your laugh is really weird and I thought you were choking so I’m awkwardly humping you while attempting to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre and why isn’t this working, you’re just choking harder now this is aweful
  • We met on a Sunday morning, both doing our walk of shame
  • I get really sick on roller-coasters and you are sitting in front of me, im so sorry
  • You’re the bastard who keeps parking in front of my house and you just caught me drawing a dick on your window with a permanent marker… ugh, oops.
  • I work at a department store and if you take out and unfold another fucking shirt and just leave it, I’m going to fucking shove it down your throat
  • You broke into my apartment drunk thinking it was your friends place and I should call the cops by my cat likes you so????
  • You’re my new dealer and you just friended me on Facebook and idk how to react to that
  • You saw me reading the same book you are and now we are arguing about the motives of the antagonist
  • This is a five-hour-long plane ride, we’re sitting together and  you’re deathly afraid of flying. 
  • I got into a cab to find someone already inside
  • You thought I was your friend/sister
  • Holy shit, im in the wrong car.
  • I was walking by a roller coaster and your shoe flew off and hit me in the head and now I’m on the floor trying not to fall unconscious.
  • It’s 2am and I’m drunk and I need some salt for my fries and I know your awake so OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR
  • You fell asleep on me in the subway and I should probably wake you up and its my stop next stop but it’s okay, I can always just catch the subway back…
  • I know nothing about camping and all my friends left me at the site. Please, help me, I think I just heard a bear
  • This has been a shitty week and you just grabbed the last box of my favourite comfort food from the shelf, do you really want to fight me rn?
  • We met in a movie theatre and now you’re clinging to me because your terrified and I’m okay with that because it means I get your popcorn.
  • You had a party and I got really drunk and stole your microwave, so now I’m at your place and your super hungover so here, I made breakfast?

Neighbour/Roomate

  • The guy living below me has a really loud alarm clock that always wakes me up at the crack of dawn
  • I went to investigate a scream and found my neighbour standing on a chair to avoid a rat/mouse/cricket (etc.)
  • My neighbour has a really squeaky bed and my bedroom is below theirs
  • You keep stealing my doormat and HAH, I’ve got you this time thief!
  • The apartment above me has left their tap on or something and water is leaking through my ceiling
  • My neighbour’s sibling got the wrong house number and barged into my apartment on accident.
  • My roommate keeps stealing my coffee so now I make extra 
  • You’re my new neighbour and wow man, you have some really weird habits.
  • You’re my neighbour and you are stealing my wifi to watch porn and can you not?
  • You locked yourself outside of your apartment and there’s a storm rolling in and I pity you so please come into my apartment I’ll make you hot chocolate?
  • I heard you singing at 3 am and joined in and now you’re at my door and wtf mate I think your drunk but your voice is really nice so?
  • I just set the fire alarm in our building off again… sorry. I know its like the fourth time this week…
  • You keep mowing your lawn when I’m trying to sleep and seriously FUCK YOU
  • My new neighbour is really hot and wow I didn’t even like women until now? And now she is in the garden planting flowers in her bikini wow… im in too deep
  • It’s 3 am and you’re blasting off classic rock at full volume and your music taste might be awesome but soME PEOPLE are trying to sLEEP
  • We’ve never met but we shower at the same time and our showers are on opposite sides of the same apartment wall so sometimes we start duets?

Pets

  • I’m out walking and my dog started chasing your dog. 
  • My cat/dog ran away and you just found it but refuse to accept the reward. 
  • We are neighbours and your cat got my cat pregnant… so, wanna raise this little kitty family?
  • My pet tarantula/snake (etc) escaped and I forgot to warn the guy below me who is terrified of snakes/spiders
  • I need you to pet sit my pet for a while and I forgot to mention it’s a snake, the mice are in the freezer. Thanks, bye
  • My cat really hates you cat and that’s the third time this week I’ve had to pry them apart.
  • My cat keeps breaking into your apartment and it ate all your plants… dinner to make up for it?
  • My cat sneaked out on the balcony and into your open window and he has this habit of destroying furniture and pissing everywhere so I followed him inside and you cam home earlier than I expected and found me in the middle of your living room and honestly I’m not a burglar
  • Your dog likes me a thousand times better than she likes your partner and sorry not sorry I love this dog
  • You were walking your dog when you found me passed out on a park bench and thank you for waking me up and buying coffee instead of stealing my wallet

Music

  • I’m on a bus and wow, you’re singing really loudly and everyone is giving you weird looks, hey bud, tone it down, also great choice in music
  • You play Double Bass/Cello and I play 1st chair Violin and we keep making eye contact and damn your super cute.
  • You play in an orchestra and I love these songs so much, plus you’re really cute. Shit man, you’ll never notice me in the huge crowd…
  • Music is kinda illegal and my friend just died and apparently he wrote music and wow I want to know what it sounds like and to play it at his funeral but I don’t know how to. You’re a well-known music dealer, do you happen to understand these notes? Can you help me?
  • I tried to act cool at this concert and I thought I was leaning on a wall but apparently it was a speaker and now it’s on the ground in pieces and everyone’s glaring at me… sorry?

Supernatural

  • I’m a wizard and I just accidently apparated into your house. Oops.
  • I died over 2000 years ago and you’ve been dead for like 2 hours, man, damn it now I have to explain this shit to you. Great.
  • I’m immortal and you’re mortal and I don’t know how to explain this to you and soon enough you’re going to realise that I’m not aging… shiiittt
  • You’re a greek god and I’m the roman counterpart. 
  • I’m a ghost and your alive and I think I’m in love with you…. Fuck. 
  • You’re a faun and I’m a Satry
  • I’m half demon and people often judge me based on my looks, but your blind and wow you actually like me? 
  • I’m a time traveller and I went back in time and wow I think I’m in love with you, fuck this isn’t good, I just faked being George Washington… wait what? George Washington doesn’t exist here? Shit… I actually am George Washington.
  • I’m a writer and your my character and wtf how the heck did you just literally climb out of my first draft? 
  • I’m a werewolf but I don’t want to tell you because my wolf form might be that really small chihuahua you keep mentioning you see when I go out…
  • I’m an android and you’re a human and wow what is that warmth I feel when I see you?
  • I’m a homesick telepath and you’re the poor soul who is receiving all these emotions, sorry
  • Somehow I’m in your body and you’re in mine and shit man being this close to the ground is fucked up.
  • I’m a genie an d you rubbed my lamp so congrats you get three wishes but you can’t seem to think of shit and why the fuck do I have to be stuck with you? Hurry up and think of some wishes okay?
  • I was an awful angel and as punishment I have to be your guardian angel and wow your super cute and nice but I still hate you
  • You keep having strange dreams that turn out to be us in a past life and you’re determined to fine me again but in this life I’m already dead.
  • We live in the year 3090, you’re a scientist and I’m your assistant. Unfortunately and experiment goes wrong and I die. Now you’re trying to put my brain into a robot but its not the same
  • I’m a vampire and I have a moment of weakness, you’re nearby and lets just say it doesn’t end well
  • I’m a dragon and you’re a really hot prince, that’s right, they locked up the wrong royalty.
  • You’re a pirate and I’m a siren and woah… are you asexual? That’s so cool, hey wait, don’t go I just want to talk
  • Your mirror is a doorway into my dimension and I can see everything…. 
  • Listen I am genetically modified and you WILL let me hide in your house
  • Ok, so I panicked and kissed this human so he wouldn’t drown. And I know you don’t want me to keep him, and we can’t let him leave if he knows about us mere people so what do you want to do?

School/College

  • I just got partnered with you in dance class and I can’t dance for shit
  • You’re my science lab partner and how the fuck did you just explode that beaker?
  • I’m an art student and you just found my sketchbook and you’re going through it. Shit man can you give that back, I don’t care how good you think they are just don’t turn that page…
  • You’re the school dork and I’m the school jock and fuck you can see where this is going
  • We are the only two kids who ride this school bus, maybe we should carpool?
  • I thought you were my roomies new boyfriend so I invited you in but your actually the RA of the dorm and now you think I want to have sex with you
  • I accidently flooded the laundry room and you really need to do laundry
  • You’re sitting in my seat in this lecture and who even are you? I’ve never seen you before… wait what, stop checking me out!
  • We argued so much during a class discussion that we both got kicked out and we’re still arguing outside the class
  • You left your USB in the library computer and I had to go through your files to figure out who you are and in the end I read the entirety of this book you’re working on and wow you’re really good?
  • I’m a traditional painter who has to take a basic Photoshop class, you’re a graphic design major sitting next to me and getting sucked into helping me out because Im so shitty at this
  • My pottery bowl exploded in the kiln and I feel like a failure, you found me crying about it in the hallway and are now trying to comfort me and your sweater is really soft wow sorry
  • You and your friends have been playing the penis game in the library for the last five minutes and none of you have gotten above a quiet yell and fuck it I’m trying to study over her so fuck you I’m going to put an end to this game by winning 
  • We are both teachers and at the end of the year we compare how many gifts we’ve received from student and you’ve won for the past three years
  • Romeo and Juliet of the math and English departments 
  • I want to get along with you roomie… but I like star wars… and you like star trek… this isn’t going to work.
  • I usually talk to my friends through morse code in class but… apparently you know morse too… and now you know I think your butt is cute
  • I got cursed and turned into an animal and taken to the shelter and now I’m being adopted by someone who is really hot OH FUCKING NO

Near Death Experiences

  • Wow I was just in a fatal accident and who the hell are you? What is this I’m I dying? Wait no, I don’t want this, how do I get out of it? A deal you say, I’ll take it.
  • You’re an executioner and I’m about to be executed but you can’t seem to run the guillotine, wait what, why are we running away, man you’re my favourite executioner
  • Our plane/boat crashed and now it’s just us on this island. 
  • I just took a super dangerous job and your trying to talk me out of it, but we really need the money
  • It’s the middle of a war and I’m on a ship that you’re ship just torpedoed. Now I’m a prisoner and wow why can’t I feel my legs. I’m not cooperating until I can feel them again. What the fuck do you mean I’m paralysed?
  • I’m addicted to ____ (drugs/alcohol etc) and you found me in an alleyway due to after effects of my addiction (beat up, overdose etc) and decide to take me in.
  • I sold my soul to bring you back to life and I don’t have long left please make this time count

Mistaken and Secret Identities

  • I’m  a thief/hacker/murder and you’ve found out my identity and have been bugging me for days to take you on as your partner
  • I’m a superhero and you want to be like me but in doing so become a supervillain, what do you mean you don’t understand why I’m punching you?
  • I’m a superhero, you’re a supervillain, but we don’t know each other’s identities and we are actually best friends
  • I’m runaway royalty and you’re a commoner, fuck I’m so screwed I need your help, I’ll explain later
  • You think I’m a celebrity and you’re talking too much for me to explain I am defintely not… that dude. What was his name again?
  • You’re a superhero and I’m your best friend and what the fuck man? Why the hell didn’t you tell me? If you had maybe I would be fucking caught with this stupid ass monologue-ing villain
  • I have a very cute neighbour and very thin walls and one day I call you and err… your moans are very synchronised with my neighbour's…
  • I’m a superhero and you’re a supervillain and I saw you visiting kids at the children’s hospital and letting them act like they defeated you and now it’s really hard to punch you in the face

Profession Based

  • Your my mailman and I can’t help but notice that you linger at my door slightly longer than you need to ever since you saw me that one time. Do you want to come inside?
  • I’m a private detective and your my client and fuck man you’re in some deep shit
  • You’re a protester and I’m a police officer. Seriously can you please calm down a little bit, this is my job not my  beliefs.
  • I’m a make-up artist/hair stylist and I you’re an actor/model and are you flirting or???
  • You’re a celebrity and sorry mate, I have to take pictures to pay rent, I know its invasive seriously, sorry
  • You’re a store clerk and fuck, is that my ex? Can I please hide behind this counter?
  • You’re a lifeguard at my kid’s swimming competition and I fell in the pool with all my clothes on and you awkwardly tried to save me even though I didn’t need it.
  • You work at a pet store and I came in to look at tarantulas but somehow we lost the biggest one and its loose somewhere in the store and it really doesn’t help that you’re terrified of spiders
  • I’m a firefighter and you started a fire in your kitchen but you’re still flirting with me even though you’re not wearing pants and I’m carrying you down a ladder. Stop complimenting my muscles for fucks sake
  • We work at the same company and I kind of had a crush on you until I noticed that you’re the asshole stealing my lunch from the office fridge.
  • I’m a firefighter and you live near the station I work at and we talk/flirt with each other a lot. One day me and my team get called to put out a fire and it’s your home ablaze. You don’t make it.
  • I work at a fruit store and you come in almost every day and rearrange stuff on the shelves and then leave. Today you made the apples spell ‘call me’
  • It’s 2am and I was just trying to get home but I left my sunroof open all day and now there’s a squirrel in my car and it scared me and I drove into a pole - stop laughing! You’re a cop, aren’t you supposed to be helping?
  • You’re drunk and want my name tattooed on your ass.
  • You always bring your dates to the restaurant I wait at and now you’re here alone… you okay mate?

Winter Times

  • It’s snowing and I usually walk to work but that’s not happening, hey roomie, can you please drive me? Yes I know its 4am
  • I accidently gave all my winter clothes to charity over the summer and not its not so much summer, but I’m broke and hey… could you give me your old winter clothes… maybe?
  • I love the cold, but I promised to visit you for a good 4 months and wow, why did I do this? There isn’t snow here?
  • I don’t know you, but you just threw a snowball at my face, mate, its on.
  • I don’t know who the hell you are, but my roommate has someone over and It’s really cold outside…. Can I come in? Or like, have a blanket, or even a towel?

Old Friends

  • I knew you in high school and I ran into you at a renaissance fair wearing full knight regalia
  • I met you once when I was 12, we started a pen-pal relationship across the world and haven’t stopped even though we are a lot older now. 
  • You were my best friend when we were younger but your family moved to the other side of the world, and we haven’t talked in years. But now your back and wow how did you recognise me when I can’t even remember your name?

Fake Dating

  • I hired you to be my date for a wedding but your super cute, maybe we cannot fake-date? 
  • I’m fake dating you to have someone to vent to on family gatherings while also pissing off my conservative uncle that I never liked and wow… have your eyes always been this nice?
  • We’re both cosplayers and we somehow always manage to meet each other at cons dressed as a popular ship and people always want photos of us in compromising positions and so we always end up fake-dating the entire day but you’re actually really hot and I’m head over heels for you
  • My friend dragged me to this party and I just saw my ex, quick make out with me, I’ll pay you.

Miscellaneous

  • I’m blind and wow your voice is absolutely beautiful can you just keep talking? Forever? Please?
  • My younger sibling is besties with your sibling and even though we hate each other I guess we’ve got to start hanging out a little
  • We are both at a grocery store at am and you offered to arm wrestle me for the last box of cereal, its on!
  • You’re sleeping on my best friend’s couch while your house is being renovated and you have really weird habits like attempting to sing opera in the shower and you keep eating all my Nutigrain 
  • We bump into each other every Friday at the supermarket to buy the same ice-cream and maybe we should eat it together?
  • Our parents are dating and thank god I’m not the only one pissed off about this
  • I went to museum to get some inspiration and then I saw you staring at one of the paintings in awe and wow you just noticed me drawing you and this is awkward
  • I decide to take a shortcut home that involves crawling through a really tight hole in a fence and I end up getting stuck and you just happened to pass by and now you’re laughing at me
  • I took a bunch of free condoms from health services just because I could and they all fell out of my bag at once and now you’re staring at me weirdly
  • We are trapped in a bank during a robbery
  • Your country is trying to take over mine and I might be a little attracted to you and stop this it’s really hard to retaliate okay?
  • I was on my balcony and you started loudly quoting romeo and juliet at me

“I see you eating whatever you want and not exercising” - Pants

Dear girl trying to get back in shape,

I know it’s hard. I know the hardest thing you may do all day is walk into the gym. I know how easy it is to want to give up and go eat Chicken McNuggets, but don’t do it. I know it feels like you work so hard and get no where. I know how frustrating it is to see that person across the table from you eat a Big Mac every day while you eat your carrots and still be half of your size. I know that awful feeling where you don’t want to go to the gym because you know how out of shape you are. Trust me, I know.

The important thing is you are doing something about it. I’m sure you get mad at yourself for letting your body get this out of shape, but life happens. You have made a huge accomplishment by not having a soda in over a month, and those small changes are huge. I understand how hard it is, I understand how frustrating it is to not see results and I understand why you want to give up. Being healthy and fit takes so much time. As much as I wish you could wake up the day after a good workout with the 6 pack of your dreams, that just isn’t the reality. If being healthy was easy, everyone would do it, and it wouldn’t feel so good when you got there.

Remember how last January your resolution was to get back in the gym and get healthy again? Think about how incredible you would look right now if you would have stuck with it. The great thing is that you can start any time, and you can prove yourself wrong.

Tired of starting over? Then don’t give up.

You are only as strong as your mind. You will get there one day. Just be patient and keep working.

— 

The Odyssey Online

Originally posted by quicksilver123456

By Chance

Summary: A/B/O!AU. Female!Reader is an Omega. Alphas and Omegas are rare, and Reader’s been able to avoid alphas through sheer force of will and luck in equal parts.

Pairing: Alpha!Bucky x Omega!Reader

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, 18+, language

Word Count: ~9,190 (… oops?)

A/N: So I started writing this with the intent to post it when I hit 200 followers. Well that milestone came and went and I’m quickly approaching 300 so it’s high time I posted this. I love all of you and hope you enjoy this <3

I’ve been wanting to write an A/B/O fanfic for a while. So, here it finally is.

I may or may not have gotten… completely carried away writing this.

Masterlist

Originally posted by sxy-seabass

Bucky’s POV

The first time he smelled her was when he was on a mission. Vanilla and Wildflower. The single-minded focus that had been drilled into him by the Hydra brainwashing and training was severed in an instant and his head whipped around to search for the source. He tore his mask off and dropped it onto the ground unceremoniously, sniffing the air frantically as he tried to pinpoint the scent. His blood sang in his veins.

The scents of the city made it hard to pinpoint her, but he wouldn’t give up. He left the spot he’d been staking out for hours, rifle forgotten on the ledge as he jumped off of the roof, dropping two stories onto the ground and rolled to diffuse the worst of the impact. His knees protested in agony anyway, but he ignored them along with the shocked cries of bystanders as he followed her scent.

He’d smelled other Omegas before. Most of them had been claimed, just a passing flicker of recognition in the back of his mind while he was out on mission. Rarely, he’d catch the scent of an unclaimed Omega, but even then it was only a brief, fleeting distraction, his Hydra programming overriding his biological programming.

Something about this Omega broke the control Hydra had over his mind, cutting through the fog with ease. He realized distantly that he’d started remembering things about himself; the feeling of chasing after an omega was familiar, linking him back to a life that had long been erased from his memory.

Keep reading

1. bts// the way he looks at you

JIN

 he looks at you with adoration. he finds you extremely cute and unique. everything you do makes him want to wrap you in a giant hug. he thinks you’re perfect for him. he adores your laugh, your smile and your sense of humour. he wonders to himself how and why he didn’t meet you sooner.

Originally posted by fawnave

SUGA

 he looks at you with soft, sad eyes, regretting everything he said. he stared at the tears streaming down your face. he hated seeing you sad, especially when he was the one who caused it. he wanted to see you happy, he wanted to see your smile that always made him weak at the knees.

Originally posted by buisually-appealing

RAP MON

he looks at you with disbelief and his mouth agape. he watched you walk out of the bathroom, already for your guys date night. he couldn’t believe how beautiful you looked. to him, you had a face straight out of a magazine. he thought to himself how could someone like him get someone like you? he noticed the blush creep along your cheeks as you noticed him staring, which made you look even more beautiful.

Originally posted by trash-for-bangtan

JHOPE

 he looked at you with pure happiness. in his whole life he has never met someone that makes him as happy as you do. just the sound of your voice makes him break out into a huge grin. the only thing that makes his grin disappear is watching you kiss your boyfriend. he wished he was your boyfriend, he wanted to kiss you, hug you, tell you that you were his everything. maybe someday, but not today.

Originally posted by yoongis--babygirl

JIMIN

 he looks at you in shock. he couldn’t understand the negative words you were saying about yourself. “i’m too fat.” “my acne is so bad” “i’m so ugly.” “why are you even with me?” he thought you were absolutely beautiful. no matter how many pounds you gained. or how many blemishes appeared. he would stay by your side and love you until your last breath.

Originally posted by jimiyoong

V

 he looks at you with love. his heart beating so loud he’s sure you can hear from down the aisle. your white wedding dress bringing out the colour of your eyes that he has became so familiar with. the bouquet of flowers matching the flower that is pinned in your hair that he loves to drag his fingers through. as you step up to stand in front of him, he can’t help but think how prepared he is to start a new chapter with you, the love of his life.

Originally posted by bangtanroyalty

JUNGKOOK

 he looks at you in fear; in fear of himself. he looks at the newly red blotch that has made its way onto your face from his hand. he looks into your eyes, full of fear and tears. your body shaking from the contact. never in a million years would you think jungkook would hit you. especially from a stupid little fight. you grab your things and storm out of the dorm, not able to look at jungkook. he watched you leave and looks down at his hand that hit you, thinking to himself that he has lost everything he has ever wanted.

Originally posted by sugutie

I’m such a liar.
When you see me, you’ll think of me as the strongest girl you’ll ever meet.
When you look at me, you’ll see a person who’s never easily hurt, while actually I can be easily hurt with a look.
When you look at me, you’ll see me holding myself like a proudly moving lioness, while if you look closely all you see is a soft kitten who needs a lot of care in order to survive.
When you see me in some situations in life, you’ll think of me as a marvelous iceberg; strong and cold, the kind of cold that is never affected, but if you know, and you’ll never know, I feel the fire burning my heart, I feel like a mad volcano that is never cooling down.
When you look at me, you’ll get the vibe that I never ever needed anyone nor will I ever do, and dont worry about that, I’m very talented at giving that vibe. But, deep down, I need, I need so badly to feel safe in someone’s arms, someone who could understand, someone who could hold something as fragile as me.
Yes, I’m a liar, a huge deceiver. So please don’t believe me when you first see me, because maybe you’re the one who could know how to heal the broken heart I hold.
—  Infinite excerpts.

I can’t believe those parents from that daddyofive channel are straight up blaming Phil for all the flack they’re getting???

Nobody is reacting the way they are to them because of what Phil said. He didn’t have to say anything, the clips from their own channel spoke for themselves. All Phil did was see kids potentially in danger and blew the whistle on it. What kind of person would he be to look away from children in need?

They’re claiming the videos are fake, which I don’t buy, but even if they faked the videos, I don’t understand what kind of reaction they expected? How do you put up videos of you yelling at, cussing at, and man handling your kids and not expect someone to try to jump in and defend those kids? It’s already fucking wild to me that it went on so long before someone finally said something.

Fake or not, you sat there and filmed, edited, and posted these videos, not seeing anything wrong with the content, and that’s still a huge fucking problem. It was aggressive, abusive, disturbing, and not in the least bit funny. You can’t just be like “but they’re for entertainment!” and be absolved of everything. The fact that they think that’s entertainment in and of itself is concerning to me.

Whatever, I dunno, I just thinking blaming someone else for being genuinely scared for your children instead of stepping back and being able to understand what you did wrong is a cop out.

nothing hurt more than when I saw a picture of you and her. You barely ever took photos with me, let alone post them. And here you were posting pictures with this girl you barely knew, and I tried not to hate her, I tried not to hate you. But my insides felt like they were ripping apart at the sight of  you. And I knew this was going to happen eventually, I guess I was just hoping it wouldn’t.  
and its just so fucking pathetic, while I’ve spent all this time missing you.. you spent it with her. You never even thought of me once.
And all I can fucking do is imagine the way that you talk to her, its probably the same way I talked to you., like you were made out of the sun or something.
And I just don’t fucking understand how one person can leave such a huge mark on you when you can’t even leave a fucking scratch on them. Because you left me and I still see you every fucking where, and I never made you feel a damn thing. you never even cared for me.
I just want it to stop, I want it all to stop. I want to stop feeling every burning fire for you. I want to stop thinking of every word you said to me, I want to stop analyzing every little part of our relationship in trying to figure out where the fuck we went wrong because I get it now. I understand..
a relationship is always doomed to end in heartbreak when there is one person who loves more and in our case, I was always the one who loved more, and now it just hurts so bad because you love her. You love her even though I wanted you to love me.. even though I gave you every fucking piece of me. You chose her.
It will never be me and you. I was never enough, and the thought of that alone breaks me into a million pieces, so how the fuck am I supposed to feel when I realize why I wasn’t enough. When I see the face of the girl who was enough..
—  I don’t think I’ll ever get over you
She is Grace (Tom Holland x Reader)

Tom Holland x Fem!Reader

*Please don’t plagiarize my work, thank you :3*

Summary: You’ve dodged the dating question for a while now, but a room full of anxious fans plus the teasing of your co stars equals a nice, long, heartfelt confession about how you’re dating a complete dork. Long story short, Seb and Anthony are pissed.

Warnings: Swearing… I’m pretty sure. Almost all my fics have swearing, so watch out. Also, so much fluff you’ll choke and die. Have a good fucking day.

Words: 1,080

If you don’t understand a reference, part one is here:

She is Beauty


You grabbed the nearest pillow off the couch and screamed into it, probably making everyone else backstage think you were crazy. But hey, your cue was about to be called, meaning you were to go on stage at a fucking Comic Con panel, so yeah, you were a bit nervous. You peeked out from behind the metal beam pillars and saw the audience, clapping and shouting as every Infinity War actor introduced themselves to the crowd.

“And now, we give a very warm welcome, to Marvel’s newest badass queen, Miss (Full Name)!”

Keep reading

A Study in Hypocrisy #2.2

Or why the Avengers’ relationship to Tony was unhealthy at best, Steve isn’t fit to be a leader, and why I’m Team Iron Man to the end.


WHY TONY’S RELATIONSHIP WITH THE AVENGERS IS UNHEALTHY AT BEST

Tony’s relationship with the Avengers has always made me uncomfortable. For the longest time, I couldn’t put my finger on why exactly, but I’ll try to organize my thoughts in this series.  

This post was getting far too long, so I decided to cut it into parts, one per Avenger.


STEVE

Steve’s relationship with Tony is bathed in hypocrisy and double standards right off the bat. When Steve meets Bruce, he tells him that he doesn’t care about his reputation and will essentially make up his own mind about what kind of person he is from what he sees as they work together. 

Yet he doesn’t apply that very same standard to Tony, instantly judging and comparing him to Bucky. 

Big man in a suit of armor. Take that away, what are you?

[…]

I know men with none of that worth ten of you.

Avengers (2012)

Where does Steve get off judging Tony like this? Reading a file doesn’t give him intimate knowledge of who Tony is as a person. And his fortune has nothing to do with who he is inside. Indeed, it sounds like he holds Tony’s fortune (which he worked hard to build—whatever people may think, SI’s products didn’t invent themselves) against him. Which makes no sense? 

In Winter Soldier, we see quickly enough that neither Steve nor Natasha trust Tony. When they show up at Sam’s, they promptly tell him everyone they know wants to kill them, which is so absurdly stupid and wrong I have no words for it. Tony would never ally with HYDRA. Tony designed the freaking helicarriers. Hell, he’s a tech genius. He was the obvious choice in this case! He could have provided them with a safe house, any supplies they needed, backup and unlimited technical help. 

But do you think they went to him? 

Nooo. And why? Apart from “they’re stupid and Marvel didn’t want to pay for RDJ,” because Steve already knew about the Winter Soldier killing Tony’s parents. They could have avoided dumping all of SHIELD’s files on the internet. They could have protected the hundreds of undercover agents who were caught unawares once their legends were blown. They could have protected those agents’ families. They could have protected the agents who weren’t undercover, but still carrying out missions at the time. They could have avoided the crazy damage caused by three giant flying machines shooting each other out of the sky right over Washington DC. There would have been considerably less loss of life had Tony been involved. 

And yet they chose to keep him out of it. 

And here’s where it starts to get very sour, and where I get very, very bitter. 

Around rolls Age of Ultron and Steve is so, so quick in putting the blame on Tony. Like everyone else, he promptly forgets Bruce’s involvement, and makes Tony the sole culprit. After 3 years fighting side by side, he doesn’t even give him the benefit of the doubt. He doesn’t pause to think of somebody other than his precious little self and wonder if, maybe, he’s not so special after all and others might have experienced visions, too. 

Nope. No, it’s evil, it’s bad, so it’s gotta be Tony’s fault. 

Then, there’s the culmination of his hypocrisy: “Sometimes, my teammates don’t tell me things.” 

Okay. First, who the fuck do you think you are, asshole? You don’t get to demand that your teammates tell you everything? What the hell! Nobody owes you anything whatsoever. 

Second, who the fuck do you think you are to demand complete transparency after keeping the secret of said teammate’s parents’ death for over a year? 

This pissed me off. so. damn. much. 

Pardon my French. 

The sheer hypocrisy, people. The balls! 

Now then. What about trusting freaking Wanda Maximoff over your teammate? She suddenly realizes that she’s gonna die too if the world ends, switches to your side out of sheer convenience and self interest, and after 30 seconds you take her advice that “Stark is evil” like she’s the Messiah? Wow. It must be nice to be so convinced of your own self-righteousness. 

Finally, Civil War

Let’s forget about the fact that Steve probably didn’t read the Accords. The entire thing has to have taken place over the course of, what… a week at most? Starting with the introduction of the Accords. There is no way in hell Steve—or anyone else on his team, really—would have managed to read and understand a piece of legislation as complex as the Accords in that time. No way. Which means that he heard a vague description of it and said “no” for… what reason again? 

But I digress. 

Tony offers compromises. He works his ass off to come up with a way to wipe Steve and Sam’s record clean, and to offer Bucky therapy instead of prison. He keeps reaching out, over and over again, only to have his hand slapped away by Rogers. But unlike Rogers, Tony doesn’t dismiss Steve’s claims that there are other Winter Soldiers. He investigates the information and then, because his heart is too big for his own good, he still goes to Siberia to help. 

And there are 5 more super soldiers just like him. I can’t let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can’t.

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Because where Steve says “I,” Tony says “we.” Because Tony Stark, who “doesn’t play well with others,” is the one who keeps reaching out and trying to move as a team. Because Steve, who keeps preaching about fighting “together” and not having secrets, keeps his tightly under wraps. Again, do you think Sam and Bucky were aware of Tony’s deal? 

Back on topic, Tony goes to Siberia to help Steve, who then proceeds to invalidate his trauma and pain at seeing his parents die in front of his eyes. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, of course Tony’s not stupid and realizes that Steve knew. But instead of confessing, Steve lies to his face all. over. again.

I will not even go into that condescending letter, which could be summarized like follows: “I’m sorry you don’t understand that I was right and you were wrong, and if you’re prepared to beg for forgiveness and freely offer your house, your toys and your money to me again, I might just, after some time, agree to forgive you. P.S.: How is it, being all by yourself in that huge place?”  

Steve is a hypocritical, holier-than-thou asshole and needs a kick where the sun don’t shine. Tony better not forgive anyone until they grovel for at least 10 years. 


ETA: Also, that “I could do this all day” line infuriated me to no end. Implying that Tony’s being a bully when he’s just been stabbed in the back by his teammates while he was trying to do what was right is downright petty, stupid, awful and shitty


Masterpost

Part 1

Part 2.1: Natasha | Part 2.2: Steve | Part 2.3: Thor

‘Autism’ is not a label

I keep reading comments and today I saw an article shared that said we shouldn’t label our children as autistic- instead we should just accept them as individuals because everyone is different. 

I didn’t know I was autistic until I was 33, so I know what it’s like to grow up without the ‘autistic’ label. 

Here are some of the labels I was given instead:

Lazy
Disorganised
Flaky
Daydreamer
Rude
Stupid
Slow
Rebellious
Stubborn
Weird
Uncool

So excuse me if I prefer ‘autistic’ over all those. 

Knowing that I’m autistic means I have an explanation for why I am different.
Knowing that I’m autistic means that I can join in the autistic community and find people like me.
Knowing that I’m autistic means I can be gentle towards myself on the days when I can’t manage ‘easy’ tasks like phone calls or cleaning or even just having a shower.
Knowing I’m autistic means that I understand myself for the first time in 33 years. 
Knowing I’m autistic means no more lying awake at night trying to figure out where I’m going wrong.

Autism is not a label. It’s me. Don’t tell me that I can’t name such a huge part of who I am. Don’t tell me that I can’t have my explanation for the way my brain works. 

Of course we should be celebrating and encouraging our children as individuals. But how is pretending they’re not autistic going to do that?

What is so wrong with being autistic that you don’t even want to say it out loud? 


Title: Family

Warnings: None

Author’s Note:  Lots of requests for the Seguin imagine. (I’ll post the Monahan one tomorrow!) The POV switches between (Y/N) and Tyler. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think!

Links: Master ListCurrent RequestsImagine Schedule

All Parts: (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)


You were lounging on the sofa with Tyler, a movie playing softly on the television. Snuggled into his chest; his arms were fastened securely around your waist, his chin resting on the top of your head. It was getting late and you’d have to leave soon, but you were enjoying your time alone with Tyler. You heard the patter of small footsteps coming down the hallway; turning your heads you saw Tyler’s son, Charlie, appeared in the doorway dragging a worn fleece blanket behind him.

“Daddy, I had a nightmare.” he sniffled; the lashes covering his bright brown eyes were damp with tears. Gosh, did that little boy look like his daddy.

“It’s alright, Charlie.” he said as he slipped his arms from your waist and stood up. “I’ll be right back.” he whispered to you, placing a soft kiss to your forehead.

You watched as Tyler knelt down next to his son and spoke comforting words to him in a hushed voice before scooping him up in his arms and carrying him back to his room. You loved watching the two of them together.

Tyler and Charlie’s mother hadn’t planned on having a baby. After the birth she had left Tyler with sole custody and hadn’t been in touch since. In the four years since then, Tyler had taken it upon himself to be the best parent possible; growing up a lot himself during that time. He didn’t like letting people into the safe and sheltered world he had created for Charlie; unwilling to expose his son to other people who may or may not stick around. You had been dating for a little under a year, and you had managed to earn Tyler’s trust and he let you in. Sort of. Although you had spent time with Charlie, Tyler didn’t let you get too close. You knew how protective Tyler was and you didn’t want to push anything on him.

You stood up with a yawn and began gathering your things as Tyler came sauntering back into the living room and flopped down on the sofa.

“Hey babe, I’m going to head home.” you said, picking your bag off the floor. As you turned to face him he sighed loudly, rubbing his hands down his face. “Tyler, what’s wrong?” you asked, sitting beside him, rubbing a hand across his broad shoulders.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do with Charlie when we go on our trip next week. His normal sitter is on vacation; my parents and sisters are really busy right now, they can’t fly in.” he said tiredly. “I hate leaving him with new sitters; he doesn’t do well with people he doesn’t know; especially with the nightmares he’s been having recently.” he explained, closing his eyes in frustration.

“He knows me, I could watch him.” you stated simply. You suddenly realized what you had said and your mouth dropped open, surprised at your own words.

Tyler’s eyes flew open and he stared at you, his eyes studying your face. You couldn’t read his expression and it worried you. Did he think you were trying to force yourself into their lives? Didn’t he trust you enough to leave his child in your care?

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I don’t want to make you feel like I’m intruding—” you began nervously.

“No, no, no.” Tyler said, cutting you off. He sat up straighter and placed a hand gently on your knee. “Do you really want to watch him? I don’t want you to feel like you have to. I know you’re busy with work and everything else going on in your life right now.”

“I really do, Tyler. I’ll switch my schedule to work around his pre-school hours. You’ll only be gone for a little over a week. I’d like to get to know Charlie better.” you said, offering him a small smile. “If you’ll let me.” you added quickly.

“You want to get to know Charlie better?” Tyler asked.

“Of course I do. I love you Tyler, and Charlie is a huge part of your life. We’ve been together for almost a year, and I plan on sticking around; I think it’d be good for us to know each other better.” you said, praying Tyler would understand how much you wanted him to fully let you into their lives.

Tyler bit his lower lip; once again he stared at you. Before any worrisome thoughts could cross your mind, Tyler wrapped his arms around you and pulled you to his chest; one hand caressing your back, the other wound through your hair, keeping you close to him.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” he murmured into your hair.

Keep reading

I’ve just seen a so-called professional (talking on a show about a serial killer) claim that people with BPD aren’t capable of feeling guilt and that is the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever heard. 

People who don’t understand BPD should just stop talking about BPD to be honest. How you can be a professional and make a huge, harmful generalisation like that is entirely beyond me. 

People with BPD can and do feel guilt. That’s a fact. 

This has been a PSA. 

For some context, in the Campaign I’m DMing we’ve been stuck in a maze of caves in search of a missing child, the party comes across two skeleton Minotaurs which I planned to be mini bosses. The party are very underprepared for the fight.

Bard(ooc): “uh- can I insult the Minotaur?”

Me: “sure, though I’m not sure it’ll do much”

*Bard uses vicious mockery, rolls a Nat 1*

Bard(ooc): “Shit, that’s not good.”

Me: “well, before your impending doom, what did you say to the skeleton?”

Bard: “I fine you quite… Humerus.”

Me: “… What?”

Bard(ooc): “I flirt when I panic”

Warlock(ooc): “How do you manage that?”

Bard(ooc): “I am capable of nonsense”

Druid(ooc): “that wasn’t even flirting”

*I roll for wisdom and didn’t beat the mark by a huge gap*

Me: “Well, the Minotaur doesn’t quite understand what you said, but it was flattered anyway. Congrats you just seduced a pile of bones”

Bard(ooc): “Oh shit, well um… Do I have a charisma bonus on her now?”

Me(ooc): “I guess so. Also the other Minotaur was her husband, he is now jealous and wants to kill you, plus he has a strength bonus on you.”

Bard: “Aw shit. Uh- I’m running behind this rock, I’m not moving and no one can tell me otherwise”

Knight: “Help us you coward!”

Bard: “you probably got this!”

*a round passes and it is the Bard’s turn again, the rest of the party are almost dead*

Barbarian: “so our fate rests with the bard?”

Warlock: “Our journey is over.”

Bard: “I convince the skeleton to kill her husband, and then herself”

Me(ooc): “wait what?”

Bard: “you heard me! Don’t question it sky narrator!”

*she rolls 18 persuasion. I roll a 5 wisdom and sigh in defeat*

Me: “She proceeds to decapitate the other skeleton, and then herself. The two collapse in a heap of bones. You’ve won.”

Barbarian(ooc): “you can’t be serious”

Druid(ooc): “Never thought I’d see the day that ‘Bard’ actually helps us in a fight.”

Knight(ooc): “We won by telling it to go kill itself.”

Bard: “I play my victory song on my sacbutt(trombone)”

*my friend proceeds to pull out her actual trombone and play Final Countdown as me and the rest of the party contemplate our life choices*

[Revised 11/16] Book Recommendations for Witches

Greetings, all. Quite some time ago, I created an annotated bibliography of some of my favorite texts on magical subjects. I was browsing it a few days ago and quickly realized, though, that it had become woefully out-of-date. There were quite a few books I’d only recently finished reading that belonged on the list! 

So, I’ve made an updated version here! Below, you can find my book recommendations, organized into loose categories. I’ve had to add a few new categories since last time, and expand several others. I do plan on doing long-form book reviews on some of these titles, and if there’s a particular one listed that you’d like to see a long review for, please let me know and I’ll work on that.

I hope you find something on here that suits your fancy! Happy reading!

For Absolute Beginners

Encyclopedia of Witchcraft, by Judika Illes. Even better than the Weiser Field Guide to Witches - this book is huge and chock-full of information. It’ll explain in easy-to-understand language how the concept has developed throughout time, why witches do what they do, and different types of witches.

The Weiser Field Guide to Witches, by Judika Illes. This gives an excellent look at the historical lore concerning witches, from the perspective of a witch herself. It’s kind of tongue-in-cheek, but it does have some information that won’t be found elsewhere.

The Modern Guide to Witchcraft, by Skye Alexander. Great book for those who’re really absolute beginners and are wondering what witchcraft is all about. Skye takes a very postmodern, utilitarian, and unfailingly honest approach, and it’s geared towards those of almost any belief system.

Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard, by Oberon Zell-Ravenheart. Attractively packaged and readible for almost all ages, this is a great (mostly) non-denominational look at the foundations of magical practice. It’s extremely detailed. Some of it only applies to Zell’s own tradition, but it’s quite useful, anyways.

Basic Techniques

Protection and Reversal Magick, by Jason Miller. This gets a little woo-woo at times, but he gives good advice on how to avoid serious problems that can come up as you begin to practice. Take with a grain of salt, though - some of this has the potential to make you feel paranoid.

City Magick, by Christopher Penczak. If you’re at all interested in tech witchery, or just want to practice magick within an urban setting, do check this out. It is by far the best look at the subject I’ve seen, and his discussion of urban tutelary spirits is worth the price alone.

Power Spellcraft for Life, by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. Nicely done, quite secular book providing basic beginner information regarding writing original spells and workings. It does fall prey to the trap of just listing correspondences with little information at times, but also contains a great deal of detail about ritual timing, raising power, and other topics essential for the beginner.

Sorcerer’s Secrets, by Jason Miller. This is a decent volume that describes a lot of techniques you don’t usually see in books, such as gesture and gaze-based magick. Be warned that Miller writes extensively about manipulative techniques, but it’s useful theory regardless of how you put it into practice.

Witch’s Bag of Tricks, by Melanie Marquis. This is not recommended for beginners, because the whole point of this book is to help existing practitioners refine and improve their already-established techniques. It’s got some novel ideas in it, and I like the author’s approach to symbolism in spellcasting.

Direct Magick (Energy Work)

The Un-Spell Book, by Mya Om. This non-denominational guide to working with magical forces is filled with useful exercises that go beyond the author’s previous work. I recommend reading this after reading Energy Essentials.

Instant Magick, by Christopher Penczak. Excellent beginner’s guide for those who don’t have access to a lot of fancy tools or prefer to work without them. This book won’t instantly teach you magick, but it will help even a seasoned practitioner find quicker, less-complicated ways of achieving results.

Energy Essentials for Witches and Spellcasters, by Mya Om. Though I balk at the use of the term “energy” to describe magical forces, this book is worth a look. It’s a bit like a workbook, with various exercises. Expect a lot of pseudoscience, though, and there are many religious references, but the techniques are solid.

Magical Writing, Words, and Symbols

Dictionary of Ancient Magic Words and Spells, by Claude Lecouteux. Mostly a historical text, this book isn’t exactly practical or terribly useful. It is, nevertheless, incredibly interesting. It’s a bit difficult to navigate, but worth a glance.

Composing Magick, by Elizabeth Barrette. A very general, but well-done, look at writing in a magical context. Some of the ritual templates are slightly specific to religious witchcraft traditions, but most information is widely applicable.

Crafting Magick with Pen and Ink, by Susan Pesnecker. Focuses both on the physical act of writing as a magical act, and the mental state associated with it. Highly recommended

The Modern Witchcraft Grimoire, by Skye Alexander. This book is for those who want to create their own grimoire. It gives fairly good advice for doing so, as well as providing hints and tricks for spellcasting and useful correspondences.

General Concepts

Planetary Magick, by Melita Denning and Osborne Phillips. If you want to work with the planets at all, particularly in a highly ritualized context, I recommend this book. It’s large, comprehensive and gives a good foundation beyond what you find in general astrology books.

Practical Planetary Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Shorter than I would have liked, but a useful reference to have on your shelf, with excellent tables and appendices in the back. The meditations are also quite useful.

Practical Elemental Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Should be read alongside the other book by this pair. Comprehensive guide to working with the elements in a ritualized fashion. Not as accessible to newbies as Lipp’s book, but good for seasoned practitioners.

The Way of Four, by Deborah Lipp. Though mostly geared towards Wiccans, I found this author’s in-depth treatment of the four elements highly fascinating. I will note that it’s probably best to get the print version of this book, as it contains exercises and quizzes.

Ingredients and Correspondences

The Herbal Alchemist’s Handbook, by Karen Harrison. I cannot praise this book enough for its concise and well-formulated approach to astrology, herbs, and magick as a whole.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Herbal Magick, by Judith Hawkins-Tillirson. This is excellent for anyone who’s interested in any kind of magick. Yes, the focus is generally herbs, but there’s a lot to be learned here about Kabbalah and other correspondence systems, as well.

Mixing Essential Oils for Magic, by Sandra Kynes. Fills a very difficult gap in published knowledge regarding the use of essential oils by discussing, in great detail, how scents interact with each other and how to create a formula that’s not only palatable, but evocative.

Dunwich’s Guide to Gemstone Sorcery, by Gerina Dunwich. Given the New Age fascination with all things shiny, it was quite a chore to sort through the myriad crystal books to find something with good information. While far from perfect and not exactly devoid of fluff, this book does give a level of detail about the lore surrounding gemstones not seen in many other texts.

Real Alchemy, by Robert Allen Bartlett. Excellent book, lots of history and detail. There’s a strong focus on tradition within the text, yet the author is quite accommodating of his audience and describes alternate methods that work better in a modern context.

Spagyrics, by Manfred M. Junius. With a highly-developed academic tone and attention to detail, this book is a meaty look at traditional alchemy. I recommend this more for intermediate practitioners due to the sheer density of information.

Spellbooks

The Goodly Spellbook, by Dixie Deerman and Steve Rasmussen. The title sounds horribly fluffy, but this is a hidden gem. It explains obscure concepts like alternative alphabets and potential uses of musical notes, as well as plant lore and other bits and pieces. Definitely worth checking out. It’s way more than just “a book of spells.”

Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells, by Judika Illes. The title sounds trite to some, but it delivers. This book has spells from almost every culture and spiritual philosophy, as well as a very detailed formulary. I read it when I’m bored sometimes, too, just because I always learn some tidbit from it.

Book of Spells, by Nicola Pulford. In most editions, this book is absolutely gorgeous and describes spellcasting traditions from a variety of perspectives and traditions. Recommended for those who already understand the basics, as this book jumps straight into spellcasting and gives only a small amount of information about how things work.

Ceremonial Magick

Modern Magick, by Donald Michael Kraig. I received this as a gift several years ago. It is essentially a workbook meant to be completed slowly, step by step, and while the format will not appeal to everyone, it’s a good easy-to-read introduction to ceremonial magick.

Familiar Spirits, by Donald Tyson. Though geared towards ceremonialists, any practitioner can likely learn a thing or two from Tyson’s interesting stroll through the whys and wherefores of spirit work and thoughtform creation. This is by far the best book I’ve seen on the topic of familiar spirits.

Secrets of High Magick, by Francis Melville. The most recent edition of this (the one I own) is lavishly-illustrated and full of rudimentary, yet useful information. He stresses the basics of ceremonial practice, and his writing style is very accessible. Highly recommended for absolute beginners.

My Life With The Spirits, by Lon Milo DuQuette. This is a memoir of a ceremonial magician, but it gives a good look at the magickal mindset in a highly developed form from someone who’s experienced quite a lot. I have major issues with DuQuette’s approach to Qabalah, but his memoirs are worth a read.

Chaos Magick

Liber Null and Psychonaut, by Peter Carroll. Classic book of chaos magick. I consider it required reading for almost anyone interested in the occult. Even if you have no love for chaos magick, do give it a read, just to understand how influential Carroll is, and why.

Hands-On Chaos Magic, by Andrieh Vitimus. Knowing some of the people involved in the creation of this book, I’m a bit biased towards it. That said, even if I didn’t know them, I would still recommend it. It’s especially interesting to read alongside Liber Null and Psychonautin order to see how the chaos “current” has developed over the years.

Pop Culture Magic 2.0 by Taylor Ellwood. There aren’t a lot of books on using pop culture symbolism in magick, but this one is nearly perfect. The author writes in a highly erudite, literate fashion, while still being accessible to newbies. Many useful resources cited, as well, so prepare to branch off a bit while reading it.

History-Related

Triumph of the Moon, by Ronald Hutton. An inside no-holds-barred look at the history of Wicca and Modern paganism. Highly recommended. This is sort of the book that fluffbunnies don’t want you to read.

Book of Lies: The Disinformation Guide to Magick and the Occult, by Richard Metzger. Lots of facts and history of magick in the context of Postmodernity. This is different from the Crowley text of the same name, which I wouldn’t recommend unless you want to focus on his tradition.

The Place of Enchantment, by Alex Owen. This is a purely historical text that documents the occult revival within the context of Modernity. I remember it being very good, but please realize I haven’t really picked it up much since graduating, and it might just have served my mindset at the time.

Imagine with me for a moment.

Imagine a teacher telling you there’s a big exam. They don’t tell you what day it’s on, what time it happens or what chapter in the textbook it will cover. Oh, and it’s your entire grade. You’re under immense pressure to get all A’s and this one class will ruin you if you score lower than an A.

Imagine feeling your stomach knot up because you don’t know how long you have to study, you don’t know what to study and the textbook is like 500 pages long.

Imagine crying every night as you try to power through all this information, but it’s impossible to retain it because there’s so much that you forget as much as you absorb.

Imagine crying when you wake up every morning afraid you missed the exam because nobody can tell you what time it is.

Imagine being stressed to the point of shaking and chewing your fingernails off whenever you go to class because today could be exam day and you’re nowhere near ready.

Imagine it finally being exam day. You were finally able to find out what time it is last night. You got an email at 2am saying the exam is at 7. 

Imagine being unable to sleep because you’re afraid you won’t get to class in time. 

Imagine going to school feeling exhausted and plopping into your seat in class. The exam starts…and it’s from a new edition of the textbook that everybody except you got, so all your cramming and preparation for the exam was for nothing. 

Imagine you bomb the test even though you gave it your best. But you are so angry that you weren’t allowed to adequately prepare for reasons that are entirely not your fault, but the failure is still on YOU. You walk out of the classroom crying in rage, kick every locker you see and go home to bury yourself under pillows for the rest of the day.

Imagine feeling like the only loser who failed that “really simple” exam and being reminded of it every time people talk about school.

That is what it feels like to be autistic and have my routine constantly shuffled around, have plans changed on me last minute and not getting enough info to prepare for something because the people who informed me of the change won’t give me any more details. All of a sudden I’m in the middle of huge sensory unknowns that I can’t prepare for, so the likelihood of having a very public meltdown may be extremely high.

Can you understand the utter frustration and helpless feeling? Do you understand how scary that is?

Be kind to the autistic people in your life. Don’t shuffle routines without warning. Don’t change plans at the last second without seeing if they’re okay with that or not. Try to be as informative as possible when mentioning something that’s coming up. Even if it’s something like “June 10th at 10:30am, dress for hot weather and expect it to be loud” is a lot more helpful than “it’s June 10th.”

Don’t get frustrated with an autistic person if they repeatedly ask you about something that’s coming up. It could mean they’re worried about it, are afraid you’ll forget about it or are hoping you have more than vague information to give them. 

Please, even if it’s the thirtieth time in an hour, try to answer nicely. Reassure them about their concerns if possible, let them know that you haven’t forgotten about it(or thank them for reminding you if you did) and give them information as it becomes available, or tell them that you’re working on finding out. 

Knowing that you’ll make sure it works out, that you remembered and that you are trying to find out about missing info can ease some worry. But make sure you actually DO look into it and pass along relevant info as soon as you know it. You’ll save the autistic person and yourself a lot of stress.

This whole scenario applies to autistic people who can talk and don’t need a lot of daily help as well as the nonverbal autistic people who need lots of daily help and can’t make their communications understood.

Actually, this goes especially for caregivers of nonverbal autistic people who need lots of daily help and can’t make their communications understood– it’s so easy to drag them through your day and forget that they have wants and needs too. 

If a major part of their routine is something like walking in circles around the living room while watching Star Trek reruns before dinner, tell them about it instead of dragging them out the door at a time they’re expecting to stim by walking and enjoying their favorite show.

Because what you’re doing is the equivalent of telling somebody you’re going to a silent mime show and then taking them to a noisy construction site instead. Their brain is prepared for a quiet experience, so their mentall walls aren’t up. What do you think is gonna happen?

anonymous asked:

Fanmail anon here! Please please turn it into a ficlet, I am BEGGING you! :D

HOLY SHIT I JUST SEE THIS FUCK I’M SORRY I SHOULD HAVE WRITTEN THIS AGES AGO. Sorry it’s short i don’t have much time lately but I hope you like it 

This is the prompt. 

————

It was not unusual for Tony to receive fanmail - or hate mail, for that matter. Truth be told, the hate mail had been more usual before he had donned the iron man suit, before he had stopped the weapons production, before he had stopped Stane and his greed. 

Of course, he had done it far too late, after far too many lives had been lost. But he couldn’t change the past; he could only try to make the future better. 

And god, did he try. He poured his mind, blood and tears into far too many projects and expos, all aiming to make the future better. Because that’s what he was good at. He was good at fixing things. He knew broken; broken was his state of being, and so he knew how to patch things up better than anything else. And the world… the world needed to be fixed, one day at a time. 

And so he worked. He worked and he created and he donned the armor but it was never quite enough. It never felt like quite enough. But the letters helped. 

Well, no, not all letters helped, the letters that came from kids - those pure, naive, good hearted, kids that made his heart skip a beat - made his day a little brighter. Most of them were silly letters, all addressed to “Mr. Iron man” asking him to do some fantastical thing that no human being could actually accomplish. 

But there were a few, particularly those signed by a kid named ‘pEter’ (his grammar wasn’t the greatest, but hey, Tony wasn’t judging), that made something inside Tony come to life. The boy talked to him about responsibility, and what being a superhero really meant. He talked about science and music. He talked about nature and monsters and metals, and Tony… Tony loved it. 

The boy wrote to him constantly, at the very least once every few months, and Tony read each one, treasuring them all equally. Jarvis had gone so far as to  pick out the kid’s cards to make a digital copy, just to make sure Tony never lost them.

They both loved the kid; Jarvis because the kid made Tony smile, and Tony because there was a kid somewhere in New York whose dreams were made of stardust and love and Tony just wanted to build an iron fort and live in them because there he found no pain, no emptiness, no shame. 

And, while Tony had still not dared to find the child - too afraid to not live up to his expectations - his mind often went to him, wondering if the faceless boy was alright. He wondered if his parents had been the ones to teach him so much about science. He wondered too if the kid had problems at school like Tony himself had because he had been too smart for his own good. But above all, Tony wondered if the kid knew just how much his letters, filled with words too big for most children to understand, meant to a man this boy had never actually met and would probably, hopefully, never meet. 

——————-

“Mr. Stark you really need to clean this place,” Peter commented as he looked around the desk for a wrench - because of course Tony Stark only had one wrench available when he most needed it - underneath a huge pile of papers. 

“Kid, don’t make me get up and find it because if I do find it, I’m not letting Dum-e make you shakes for the rest of the week,” Tony vaguely threatened from where he stood hunched over the armor. 

Peter muttered under his breath but didn’t comment, instead picking up a pile of papers. He moved them gently to the side, the red ink on the blue paper on top catching his eye. 

“oh my god,” He breathed out, unaware that he had said it out loud. 

Tony stood upright then immediately, turning to face Peter. “What happened, are you alright? Did you hurt yourself?” The man asked immediately, unable to keep his worry off of his voice. 

“You kept them,” Peter said, half in awe, as he raised the blue paper with big red splotches all over. “You… You kept the letters I sent you.” 

Tony froze, feeling the world screech into a halt as his focus narrowed down to the innocent piece of paper on Peter’s hands. 

That was one of the letters. 

That was one of the last letters the kid has sent him, almost three years ago. 

That was one of the kid’s letters.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter asked after a few minutes, shuffling uncomfortably as the man in front of him continued to stand preternaturally still, his eyes fixed on Peter. 

“It was you?” Tony asked after a few seconds, his voice rough with emotion. “All those letters… you… you wrote me those letters?” 

Peter flushed, smiling shyly at his mentor. “I… yeah… I mean, I told you, you were my hero when I was growing up.” 

Tony wasn’t sure whether to feel elater or doomed. “They were good… your letters,” Tony said after a few more minutes of that oppressively awkward silence. “They always made me smile.” 

Peter beamed at that, not sure exactly what it was that Tony wasn’t telling him,  and it was clear by the fond yet horrified look on the man’s face that there was a lot he wasn’t telling him, but not caring in the slightest. 

Because Tony had kept them, which meant Tony had cared. 

Even then, when Peter had been nothing more than an eight year old boy, Tony had cared. And that, that was enough to make Peter happier than any teenager had the right to be. 

anonymous asked:

like? i honestly don't get people (haters and those who stopped watching) who say spn has bad writing? of course not ever episode will be as good, but for a show at it's THIRTEENTH season the writing hasn't let up at all (it's just more simplified), sfter all those years i still find the dialogue utterly fascinating. i really don't get it but maybe i'm just biased :/

Yeah, and the thing is the show has gradually moved from what was good writing for season 1 or 4 or whatever, to whatever makes it still work after 8 or 13 seasons… 

Like, the internal mirroring in season 1? It’s there, it’s good, there’s a lot more than you think and you’d basically have to watch the season twice, once forwards and once backwards as soon as you’re done before you forget all the little details to catch all the stuff. I mean there’s some things which are obvious like the Mary and Jess dying either end of their episode things. And then there’s stuff like 1x09 and 1x17 both having Sam and Dean obsessed with drawing something that they’re trying to capture on a piece of motel notepaper or whatever. Little motifs that barely mean anything but give a sort of coherency and nod to earlier writing, which is basically just stuff you do to assure the viewer there’s a sense of having things under control. 

Cycle all the way up to season 13 and you can have so many nuanced references going on that just the MotW in 13x05 mirrors 5 different season 1 episodes, a season 8 main arc thing, a random season 11 motw, or 7x19 even, for the house full of ghosts thing… and probably some other stuff I can’t even remember now, and that’s before we get to the main plot half, and the emotional arcs. And those references aren’t just in there as a competency check, but because it means stuff and it’s relevant. The parallel to Lucas the mute kid in 1x03 who Dean related to? SUPER RELEVANT to his emotional state now. For like the entire season we’ve had 1x02′s “saving people, hunting things” speech lurking around in Dean’s actions visibly decayed and broken from its original meaning. 1x10 was visually referenced and that is important because of the Sam and Dean at odds stuff, and some of their most important yelling at each other about how they see each other and how John affected them and how they see John through each other happened there, all of which is being recycled in how they’re treating Jack. I could keep going but point is, the writing is good surface viewing, and a really rich soup of past canon references for people who want to analyse it, because just showing they understand the story they’re telling is a huge sign of good writing, and makes me confident to assume they do mean basically everything they imply. 

But on the other hand in season 1 you can really feel scared and alone and confused and like the entire universe around them is too big and filled with evil and they’re small and incompetent and just want to find their dad and go home, and that aesthetic is excellent, but you can’t keep going with that past even season 1, so they start to get more people in their lives, even just passing acquaintances at first, and a couple of settled locations. And the story can’t just be the same simple goals over and over again or what’s the point in setting up a big looming battle between good and evil from the very start if it’s just escalating and deescalating clashes with a few important demons, a 4 episode per season main arc about family, and then a bunch  of monster hunts? For one thing they’d run out of hunts :P So more plot, more characters, and it all starts eroding the original aesthetic because better writing for what they’re working with means abandoning what originally made the show good because it can NEVER make the show good again IN THAT WAY.

And by season 6 the mytharc is all concluded, and you basically have to pick the show up and turn it around, and start telling it all backwards, and make it personal instead, because not only is escalating threat meaningless after the victory in season 5, but they have a massive world full of characters and resources and KNOWLEDGE and you can’t have the Winchesters alone against the world. There’s jokes about how in season 1 they wouldn’t know a vampire if it bit them on the arse but then in season 8 Dean just goes and clears a house of them out for his vampire BFF. Or season 1 Dean vs demons and then just cut to him and Crowley drinking together. Like… it’s experience and competence and also just the story can’t maintain itself if it never explores new avenues where monsters stop being scary for being monsters and start being scary for what they say about the characters… Which 2x03 does for Dean, and everything since has been post-picking up the story and turning it around. I mean, that can happen at any point really, but the season 1 approach to monsters was completely unsustainable because they’d run out of monsters. Look at how werewolves never came back until season 8 and when they did, Robbie retconned the crap out of them so they could be used in different stories. Werewolves who transform unknown to themselves and can be monsters without ever knowing it? Are good for like 1 story only, and that was the one they told in Heart. And until you suck it up and retcon it, you can NEVER use werewolves even as incidental monsters. We didn’t even see them in season 6. 

And all these changes are happening all the time, and bit by bit things like “can’t have the Winchesters without any reoccurring side characters to help/hinder them” and “monsters aren’t all evil” and “escalate the mytharc at least a notch higher than previously or start over but make it personal” and all these changes happen one at a time for good reasons, until you end up with a show which looks nothing like the original one but still has its DNA. It’s just grown up into an adult version of itself that can carry its own weight. And that’s good long-form writing.

I don’t actually think the writing has simplified, it’s just behaving in a different way now. Season 1 and 2 were pretty raw and full of character dynamic stuff but the main plot was very simple and tropey because it could afford to be because the show was a bunch of world building and a focus on the MotW episodes, and the main plot was a bonus and a mystery to string us through episode to episode, so the main pull WAS the character stuff between Sam and Dean as an identifying feature of the show. But you can’t tell that story over and over where they don’t know what’s happening and it never comes near them until shit hits the fan. For one thing, they blew all their cards ages ago on things seeded into their life from birth that they had no idea about but were always fated to happen, unless there’s something that happened to Dean that’s just been idly ticking away waiting for him to hit 40 for him to be slapped with some ancient curse Millie Winchester activated poking around with artefacts Henry brought home from work or something. Again, once the demon blood reveal comes you basically pick up the show, turn it around, and start telling in the other direction from the build up to that reveal, and we’re still going in that same direction that Sam’s been reacting to since 2x21. That’s the hugest thing to happen in their family history in terms of plot so everything has to loop around that somehow, and new reveals are just “why” ones not “what” ones, in 4x03 and 5x13.

The show the hardcore original couple of seasons fans are longing for is one that wrote itself out of existence with its OWN good writing. Sam and Dean DEMANDED more characters to interact with to show more facets of themselves and for them to be challenged, so they got Ruby and then Cas. The plot was rolling along building up steam so excitingly that it COULD go to an epic fated apocalypse, and sell that our guys were the ones caught in the middle and ready to save the world. They weren’t the same dweebs as season 1. 

And instead you get this INCREDIBLE character writing… Like, Sam and Dean leap off the page as it were right from the start, and without them being good characters the show would never have amounted to anything because Sam and Dean was all the show depended on to start with. And it’s still going on their charisma and chemistry, but it’s FAR from all that now. They get characters thrown at them to see what sticks, and increasingly characters begin to stick. Characters would basically never be seen again originally. And then a few began to show up over and over after Bobby and then the Roadhouse lot, and season 3 had a whole bunch of actual reoccurring characters and stuff like surprise returns for the Trickster or whatever - things that began to make it feel like the world was populated with more than the Winchesters. And by season 8 when the narrative shifts to being primarily character-based and action driven, repeat characters are allowed to show up and stay in ways that they never would have in the past. You get in season 8 Garth, Kevin and Charlie all coming back since season 7 first appearances, Cas and Crowley get their first season they’re actually both in all the way through at the same time, and then there’s repeat characters introduced in that season for its story. Amelia and Benny, and Abaddon and Metatron. It’s CROWDED. The Winchesters are being defined by the people around them and it’s how they react and make their decisions that affects the story. Which allows for delving right down into them and doing masses of character building because all the plot stuff is affected by character things.

And I think Destiel gets so compelling around this time because the shift to emotional storytelling means it’s less what they do and more how what they do affects them and each other. Everyone’s getting defined more by the people around them but Cas and Dean have this whole weird profound thing going already. 

As we go through all that the story becomes more and more self-reflective. 6x01 and 8x01 both reboot the story in weird various ways, going back to the pilot for inspiration. 6x01 just again is about picking up the story and turning it around and telling it in another direction, but 8x01 gets really meta about it… Dabb era snuck up on us because it starts somewhere in the middle-end of season 11, but the end of season 11 is another pick up and turn around moment, but instead of re-telling it begins to completely deconstruct and break down everything that the story had been previously defined by. Which means in many ways the drift back to trying to tell simpler episodes with season 1 themes and style makes it look simpler, but after you stick out 12 years of the show and then get to it, if you look at what they’re doing, part of the reason why the episodes feel SO good, is because there’s a deep intelligence to it all, at least in storytelling terms. Finding what is fresh by taking the things which are worn down and tiresome and trying to do something with them. Subtly, in season 12… A bit louder for the people in the back in season 13 :P But there’s a clever purpose behind it, and the episodes are engaging for other reasons and as a bonus we’re seeing the characters in ways we haven’t really seen them before. Or as we haven’t seen them for a long long time. 

I think a lot of intelligence in good writing is not forgetting the beginning of the story halfway through or at the end or anything. Which is a serious problem when the show is so long. It’s why you sometimes get lines like in 5x21 where Sam and Dean have an exchange where they talk about remember when we used to just hunt Wendigo (*takes a shot*) or in 12x06 why that was the monster they had that game about… It’s meta commentary for mentioning it to go back to the start, to examine their lives (as we were doing to Asa) and remember how it all began. To get a sense of context and continuity that these are the same guys from the start of the show, who have been through *all that* and are still here, being themselves, in their further adventures. 

I think the style has obviously, necessarily, changed a lot but I don’t think it’s simplified anywhere, just that the changes and evolution it’s been through means that the way it’s told now is different, in this case blending nostalgia with trying to convince us we need to keep watching, still, after 13 years, for some of the weird ideas they have going forwards… I think that involves a LOT of character emphasis like being able to take most of 13x01 to mourn Cas when we know he’s coming back, or this whole grief arc, really. Or look at the evolution of Dean worrying about Cas in season 8, 11 and 12 when he’s missing/possessed and how each time it was significantly louder and more important as what Dean was dealing with and how it was affecting him and how important it was to the narrative as a whole. It’s like someone saying a sentence over and over but repeating it with different emphasis. And louder. And the longer the show goes on the less it can rely on one type of telling and the more it has to rely on the other, although I sort of feel like season 13 is hitting a point where I’m not sure where else they GO from here :P 

It’s flipped right back to season 1 in a way, that there’s very little “main plot” intruding on them, right now, except via grief or having Jack around, which of course just elicits a bunch more character development and emotional arc stuff. But the entire history and complexity of the show is still there, so a regular MotW can turn into a chat with Death, who talks to Dean about cosmic matters. Their world is never not going to be huge now after it’s been escalated so far, but on the other hand, you can go back to that season 1 feeling where character development was basically all they had lying around… It’s all massively complex, but on a sublime lower level to what’s going on in the main plot. 

Same as last year, the plot stuff all just served the emotional arcs and it could be literally anything as long as it gave the right nudges to the characters. So far this season it’s been going much better, probably because it feels simpler and there’s been less direct main plot nonsense going on and letting the characters breathe and deal with the emotional stuff… 

Idk, tl:dr I sort of feel like everything season 11 onwards has just been rewarding fans of the show who kept watching that long, made by people who love the show and are delighted it’s been around this long… Like, if anything, the writing might seem simplified because they’ve written so much show that it’s like a self-fuelling self-nostalgia perpetual motion machine for the last couple of seasons. But the very fact it seems easy and simple is betraying how intelligent some of the writing actually is, because at no point has it let up on the depth it’s written at, and with more show it just means MORE stuff to mirror, parallel and build off of. The writing is probably proportionately better than it ever has been because it’s not a level playing field, it’s a MASSIVE MOUNTAIN of past canon all the new writers have to wrangle, learn, and love before they can start writing. And they show that they HAVE and produce great episodes out of it. 

Astral Travel Tips

I personally do a lot of my astral traveling while I sleep. I would do it during the day if I had time, but honestly… I am a store manager that typically sees 50 hours of work time. By the time I get home I have to do some chore or I just want to rest. So doing all my astral work is done while my body recuperates.

Here are a few tips that have helped me:

  1. Be okay with not remembering everything you do at night. I don’t remember everything. I do A LOT at night. To remember everything would take time I do not have. If I have the energy I will lay in my bed trying to recall the details of the night before. But its okay if you don’t remember everything or anything at first.
  2. On that note, I have learned that if I lay in bed I can remember what I have done better. Its how I can remember dreams. I know though I can’t always do this because of my work schedule. Try different methods to which will help you recall the best.
  3. In the beginning its nice to have a guide. I worked a lot with a couple beings I know who helped guide me. They would make it easier for me to move to the astral, as well as understand its mechanics. If you have done it before while awake then while sleeping shouldn’t be a huge step. Just ask help from someone you trust.
  4. Pay attention to your dreams. I have learned the difference between dreams of mine. Some of them hint at things I have done on the astral. Though these dreams may not be a literal translation. Sometimes my mind will try to make sense of the astral world by converting things into something in my mundane-waking life. I typically keep a dream log for this. Its something where if I have time I jot down notes of my dreams. (You can learn to Lucid Dream if you want, but its not necessary. I sometimes Lucid Dream but not all the time. I just learn the differences between how my dreams feel to understand if it had something to do with the astral)
  5. Everyone experiences the astral differently. Keep your mind open and let it interpret itself in the manner that is best for you. Like I am very claircognizant. I just know most of the time that something happened. That I knew someone/thing said such and such. There are few times that I actually hear it. There are times that trips the night before will play out like memories. It varies and I am okay with that. I just know what works for me.
  6. I have a dream/astral travel pouch under my pillow. Its of items that have meaning to me to help pull me into recalling my time in the astral. You can also make one to help with making it there. (if you would like me to post the bag I use then let me know.)
  7. Get on a regular sleeping schedule. A regular sleeping schedule helps your body get used to when its going to the astral. Plus self care helps a lot when you start doing astral work. 
  8. In the beginning don’t try doing astral work every night. It can make you more tired than before you fell asleep. Its easier to start slow and work your way up. I know that when my mundane life gets crazy I have to back off on the astral work. I crashed and burned in February because not only was I working 50-60 hour weeks in my waking life, I was also doing an insane amount of work on the astral during holidays through January. Its important to have down time from even astral travel! 

These are some of the things that has helped me out a lot when beginning my astral traveling at night. This is not everything you can do. There are so many tricks out there and its about finding what works for you. But hopefully this can help anyone out. C: