do you understand how huge this is to me

I just explained my issues with executive dysfunction to my dad and holy shit he gets it!


I described it like this: 

Imagine you’re back at AllPro(where he worked) with fifty phones and they’re all ringing. You want to answer them all because they’re all equal priority. That’s an environmental cue– phones are generally a ‘respond immediately’ cue.

Picking up a phone is a simple thing. You know it’s as easy as deciding which phone to answer and reaching out to pick it up, but your brain is saying “I must answer all of them!” The phones are ringing, and you can’t make your body reach out to pick one up because you don’t have fifty arms to reach out, you don’t have fifty ears to listen with, you don’t have a brain that can process and respond to fifty conversations and you don’t have fifty mouths that can all say different things all at the same time. 

Either you do it all simultaneously or nothing will happen. You can want to do it so bad it makes you cry, and you can’t make a decision because no choice seems like the right one. So the task stays unfinished and you get frustrated every time somebody reminds you to “just do it, it’s not that hard!” Because yes, it really IS that hard.

Now, if you had somebody who could point to which phone to answer, you can do it fine. That’s a prompt. Prompting removes the ‘middle man’ thought that says ‘do it all at once’ and gets you to focus on tasks one at a time instead of seeing them as some towering insurmountable mess.

Dad looked at me for a couple of seconds and said something to the effect of, “I didn’t know doing things were that hard for you.”

This is a major, major, major breakthrough between us because dad had it in his head that I left things messy because I didn’t care. While that’s crappy of him to assume, teaching him how that’s not the case and having him really understand it is a huge deal.

[Revised 2/17] Books for Witches, Diviners and Spellcasters

Hi, everyone. A while back (a long time ago, actually), I started an annotated bibliography on books about witchcraft and magick, and I’ve updated it once (last November). 

Since then, I’d been keeping a list of things I need to add to it, but didn’t get around to actually reworking and updating the list a second time until today. Largely because I can’t really go outside much today because of the smog. But anyways, here it is. I’ve also included divination-related books in this version, whereas previously they were separate.

I hope you find something on here that suits your fancy! Happy reading! Also, yes, I do want to do more book reviews on this blog, so if you’d like a longer review of one of the books listed below, let me know and I can write one.

For Absolute Beginners

Encyclopedia of Witchcraft, by Judika Illes. Even better than the Weiser Field Guide to Witches - this book is huge and chock-full of information. It’ll explain in easy-to-understand language how the concept has developed throughout time, why witches do what they do, and different types of witches.

The Weiser Field Guide to Witches, by Judika Illes. This gives an excellent look at the historical lore concerning witches, from the perspective of a witch herself. It’s kind of tongue-in-cheek, but it does have some information that won’t be found elsewhere.

The Modern Guide to Witchcraft, by Skye Alexander. Great book for those who’re really absolute beginners and are wondering what witchcraft is all about. Skye takes a very postmodern, utilitarian, and unfailingly honest approach, and it’s geared towards those of almost any belief system.

Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard, by Oberon Zell-Ravenheart. Attractively packaged and readible for almost all ages, this is a great (mostly) non-denominational look at the foundations of magical practice. It’s extremely detailed. Some of it only applies to Zell’s own tradition, but it’s quite useful, anyways.

Basic Techniques

Protection and Reversal Magick, by Jason Miller. This gets a little woo-woo at times, but he gives good advice on how to avoid serious problems that can come up as you begin to practice. Take with a grain of salt, though - some of this has the potential to make you feel paranoid.

City Magick, by Christopher Penczak. If you’re at all interested in tech witchery, or just want to practice magick within an urban setting, do check this out. It is by far the best look at the subject I’ve seen, and his discussion of urban tutelary spirits is worth the price alone.

Power Spellcraft for Life, by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. Nicely done, quite secular book providing basic beginner information regarding writing original spells and workings. It does fall prey to the trap of just listing correspondences with little information at times, but also contains a great deal of detail about ritual timing, raising power, and other topics essential for the beginner.

Sorcerer’s Secrets, by Jason Miller. This is a decent volume that describes a lot of techniques you don’t usually see in books, such as gesture and gaze-based magick. Be warned that Miller writes extensively about manipulative techniques, but it’s useful theory regardless of how you put it into practice.

Witch’s Bag of Tricks, by Melanie Marquis. This is not recommended for beginners, because the whole point of this book is to help existing practitioners refine and improve their already-established techniques. It’s got some novel ideas in it, and I like the author’s approach to symbolism in spellcasting.

Direct Magick (Energy Work)

The Un-Spell Book, by Mya Om. This non-denominational guide to working with magical forces is filled with useful exercises that go beyond the author’s previous work. I recommend reading this after reading Energy Essentials.

Instant Magick, by Christopher Penczak. Excellent beginner’s guide for those who don’t have access to a lot of fancy tools or prefer to work without them. This book won’t instantly teach you magick, but it will help even a seasoned practitioner find quicker, less-complicated ways of achieving results.

Energy Essentials for Witches and Spellcasters, by Mya Om. Though I balk at the use of the term “energy” to describe magical forces, this book is worth a look. It’s a bit like a workbook, with various exercises. Expect a lot of pseudoscience, though, and there are many religious references, but the techniques are solid.

Hedgewitchery and Astral Travel

Ecstatic Witchcraft, by Gede Parma. This is actually probably my favorite book on this subject, even though hedgeriding is only a part of what the book discusses. The only bad thing I can really say about this book is that it’s really not recommended for beginners, and it’s helpful to have the basics of visualization already mastered (for example) before doing the exercises Parma recommends.

By Land, Sky and Sea, by Gede Parma. This book goes into even greater details regarding different ways of conceptualizing the cosmology of hedgeriding, and I find it a very refreshing book that appreciatively draws from a number of different perspectives while grounding itself, so to speak, with the overarching metaphor of land, sky, and sea as the three worlds.

The Temple of Shamanic Witchcraft, by Christopher Penczak. Penczak is usually a pretty mixed bag, and this book is no exception. It gives a lot of good practical information and a very in-depth exploration of the three worlds (a useful concept), but it’s primarily framed by Wicca, so it might not resonate with those of other faiths and particularly those who aren’t pagan at all.

Ascension Magick, by Christopher Penczak. There’s a chapter or two in this that address alternate ways of conceptualizing the architecture of reality, and it’s pretty helpful for a hedgerider. Beyond that, this book is mostly about ceremonial magick, but it’s a (mostly) good book. Certain parts (such as the bit about UFOs) are a little off, in my opinion.

The Shamanic Witch, by Gail Wood. This book is really best suited for someone who practices Wicca and, besides the background info and cosmological descriptions, is really only useful in the context of that tradition. If you’re Wiccan or willing to pick around a lot of Wiccan-talk, though, this is a good foundation.

Witches, Werewolves and Fairies, by Claude Lecouteux. It can be hard to find scholarly works on these phenomena that are affordable, but here’s one I personally enjoyed. It details many accounts of journeying experienced by both pagans and Christians in earlier times, and gives a good description of the concept of the astral double, the architecture of the soul, and other topics throughout history.

Betwixt and Between, by Storm Faerywolf. This book is mostly a guide to the Feri tradition of witchcraft, but while I myself don’t practice that, those who do seem to know a lot about hedgeriding! The book has several chapters on the subject and is highly recommended for this reason.

The Psychic Energy Codex, by Michelle Belanger. A lot of people have strong opinions about this author, but this is book actually provides a lot of good information about so-called “energy work” which can be a step in the right direction for those wanting to ride the hedge.

Psychic Dreamwalking, by Michelle Belanger. In this book, Belanger discusses, essentially, how to use your non-waking life as a vehicle to for journeying, and while I myself don’t usually dreamwalk, much of what she says applies to hedgeriding in other states, too.

Hedge Riding and Hedge Witchcraft, by Harmonia Saille. I only mention these two in order to say that they’re best avoided. Saille tries to give a comprehensive look at the phenomenon, but it’s poorly-written and overly New Age. The negative reviews of them on Amazon really cover the problems with these book in more detail than I ever could.

Magical Writing, Words, and Symbols

Dictionary of Ancient Magic Words and Spells, by Claude Lecouteux. Mostly a historical text, this book isn’t exactly practical or terribly useful. It is, nevertheless, incredibly interesting. It’s a bit difficult to navigate, but worth a glance.

Composing Magick, by Elizabeth Barrette. A very general, but well-done, look at writing in a magical context. Some of the ritual templates are slightly specific to religious witchcraft traditions, but most information is widely applicable.

Crafting Magick with Pen and Ink, by Susan Pesnecker. Focuses both on the physical act of writing as a magical act, and the mental state associated with it. Highly recommended

The Modern Witchcraft Grimoire, by Skye Alexander. This book is for those who want to create their own grimoire. It gives fairly good advice for doing so, as well as providing hints and tricks for spellcasting and useful correspondences.

General Concepts

Planetary Magick, by Melita Denning and Osborne Phillips. If you want to work with the planets at all, particularly in a highly ritualized context, I recommend this book. It’s large, comprehensive and gives a good foundation beyond what you find in general astrology books.

Practical Planetary Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Shorter than I would have liked, but a useful reference to have on your shelf, with excellent tables and appendices in the back. The meditations are also quite useful.

Practical Elemental Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Should be read alongside the other book by this pair. Comprehensive guide to working with the elements in a ritualized fashion. Not as accessible to newbies as Lipp’s book, but good for seasoned practitioners.

The Way of Four, by Deborah Lipp. Though mostly geared towards Wiccans, I found this author’s in-depth treatment of the four elements highly fascinating. I will note that it’s probably best to get the print version of this book, as it contains exercises and quizzes.

Ingredients and Correspondences

The Herbal Alchemist’s Handbook, by Karen Harrison. I cannot praise this book enough for its concise and well-formulated approach to astrology, herbs, and magick as a whole.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Herbal Magick, by Judith Hawkins-Tillirson. This is excellent for anyone who’s interested in any kind of magick. Yes, the focus is generally herbs, but there’s a lot to be learned here about Kabbalah and other correspondence systems, as well.

Mixing Essential Oils for Magic, by Sandra Kynes. Fills a very difficult gap in published knowledge regarding the use of essential oils by discussing, in great detail, how scents interact with each other and how to create a formula that’s not only palatable, but evocative.

Dunwich’s Guide to Gemstone Sorcery, by Gerina Dunwich. Given the New Age fascination with all things shiny, it was quite a chore to sort through the myriad crystal books to find something with good information. While far from perfect and not exactly devoid of fluff, this book does give a level of detail about the lore surrounding gemstones not seen in many other texts.

Real Alchemy, by Robert Allen Bartlett. Excellent book, lots of history and detail. There’s a strong focus on tradition within the text, yet the author is quite accommodating of his audience and describes alternate methods that work better in a modern context.

Spagyrics, by Manfred M. Junius. With a highly-developed academic tone and attention to detail, this book is a meaty look at traditional alchemy. I recommend this more for intermediate practitioners due to the sheer density of information.

Spellbooks

The Goodly Spellbook, by Dixie Deerman and Steve Rasmussen. The title sounds horribly fluffy, but this is a hidden gem. It explains obscure concepts like alternative alphabets and potential uses of musical notes, as well as plant lore and other bits and pieces. Definitely worth checking out. It’s way more than just “a book of spells.”

Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells, by Judika Illes. The title sounds trite to some, but it delivers. This book has spells from almost every culture and spiritual philosophy, as well as a very detailed formulary. I read it when I’m bored sometimes, too, just because I always learn some tidbit from it.

Book of Spells, by Nicola Pulford. In most editions, this book is absolutely gorgeous and describes spellcasting traditions from a variety of perspectives and traditions. Recommended for those who already understand the basics, as this book jumps straight into spellcasting and gives only a small amount of information about how things work.

Ceremonial Magick

Modern Magick, by Donald Michael Kraig. I received this as a gift several years ago. It is essentially a workbook meant to be completed slowly, step by step, and while the format will not appeal to everyone, it’s a good easy-to-read introduction to ceremonial magick.

Familiar Spirits, by Donald Tyson. Though geared towards ceremonialists, any practitioner can likely learn a thing or two from Tyson’s interesting stroll through the whys and wherefores of spirit work and thoughtform creation. This is by far the best book I’ve seen on the topic of familiar spirits.

Secrets of High Magick, by Francis Melville. The most recent edition of this (the one I own) is lavishly-illustrated and full of rudimentary, yet useful information. He stresses the basics of ceremonial practice, and his writing style is very accessible. Highly recommended for absolute beginners.

My Life With The Spirits, by Lon Milo DuQuette. This is a memoir of a ceremonial magician, but it gives a good look at the magickal mindset in a highly developed form from someone who’s experienced quite a lot. I have major issues with DuQuette’s approach to Qabalah, but his memoirs are worth a read.

Chaos Magick

Liber Null and Psychonaut, by Peter Carroll. Classic book of chaos magick. I consider it required reading for almost anyone interested in the occult. Even if you have no love for chaos magick, do give it a read, just to understand how influential Carroll is, and why.

Hands-On Chaos Magic, by Andrieh Vitimus. Knowing some of the people involved in the creation of this book, I’m a bit biased towards it. That said, even if I didn’t know them, I would still recommend it. It’s especially interesting to read alongside Liber Null and Psychonautin order to see how the chaos “current” has developed over the years.

Pop Culture Magic 2.0 by Taylor Ellwood. There aren’t a lot of books on using pop culture symbolism in magick, but this one is nearly perfect. The author writes in a highly erudite, literate fashion, while still being accessible to newbies. Many useful resources cited, as well, so prepare to branch off a bit while reading it.

History-Related

Triumph of the Moon, by Ronald Hutton. An inside no-holds-barred look at the history of Wicca and Modern paganism. Highly recommended. This is sort of the book that fluffbunnies don’t want you to read.

Book of Lies: The Disinformation Guide to Magick and the Occult, by Richard Metzger. Lots of facts and history of magick in the context of Postmodernity. This is different from the Crowley text of the same name, which I wouldn’t recommend unless you want to focus on his tradition.

The Place of Enchantment, by Alex Owen. This is a purely historical text that documents the occult revival within the context of Modernity. I remember it being very good, but please realize I haven’t really picked it up much since graduating, and it might just have served my mindset at the time.

Tarot

The Book of Thoth, by Aleister Crowley. Make sure you actually own (or have access to pictures of) the Thoth deck before you dive into this. By far one of the best books on Tarot ever published. The prose is often dense and purple, but in this one book, Crowley teaches so much about Tarot and it’s connection to the Western Mystery Tradition. I can’t really say much more - it must be experienced.

The Pictorial Key to the Tarot, by Arthur Edward Waite. I recommend this book because it is a classic and was introductory for many older readers. It will teach you to read and gives insight into the methodology behind the Waite-Smith deck specifically, particularly his use of what are essentially parables and why he does this. Do not expect too much esoteric information, but read it anyways.

Seventy-Eight Degrees of Wisdom, by Rachel Pollack. This is the epitome of a good modern Tarot book and is really one of the first ones I’d recommend for someone looking for an accessible book on Tarot in a modern context. Very dense in information and history, yet altogether worth it. You’ll want highlighters nearby for this one!

Tarot for a New Generation, by Janina Renée. This is essentially a book for children and teenagers, but I do recommend it for them, specifically, because it is well-written, easy to understand, and helpful to absolute beginners.

Secrets of the Waite-Smith Tarot, by Marcus Katz and Tali Goodwin. This book focuses just on the history, symbolism, and creative process of the Waite-Smith deck. It gives you an inside line on just what Pixie Smith was thinking when painting specific scenes, and is a great look at her life’s work, as well.

The Tarot: History, Symbolism, and Divination, by Robert M. Place. This book will not teach you to read Tarot, but does give an actual, accurate portrait of the history of the phenomena, which is incredibly important and useful. Know your history.

Understanding Aleister Crowley’s Thoth Tarot, by Lon Milo DuQuette. I hesitate to recommend DuQuette due to issues I have with his approach to Qabalah, but many people ask me for a beginner book for the Thoth Tarot specifically, and this is the closest I’ve come to finding one. I recommend reading this alongside, and not instead of, Crowley’s Book of Thoth.

The Back in Time Tarot, by Janet Boyer. This is more for the intermediate reader, and the entire book details a single, extremely useful technique for familiarizing yourself with the cards, namely by framing past events in terms of how they might appear in a spread.

Lenormand

The Essential Lenormand, by Rana George. This was not the first Lenormand book I picked up, but it was the most influential and intense. Ms. George writes in a personable, touching fashion and brings the concepts of the system home by relating them to life experiences in a way rarely seen. She is one of those authors I literally go all “fangirl” over.

Learning Lenormand, by Marcus Katz and Tali Goodwin. This is one of the better beginner books on Lenormand. I’m not going to lie - it isn’t as good as Rana George’s, but it definitely is worth reading if you’re completely new to the system. It’s very accessible, where some of the books I’ll be listing later in this can seem intimidating, or so I’ve been told.

Lenormand: Thirty-Six Cards, by Andy Boroveshengra. This book is intense, but in a different way than Ms. George’s. Expect to be inundated with information and techniques. Another one of those where you really need to take notes or highlight while reading, and read it multiple times.

Secrets of the Lenormand Oracle, by Sylvie Steinbach. This book is organized in a novel and useful fashion by topic, and gives specific techniques for readings on love, money, spirituality, and other topics. Highly recommended, and I tend to use it as a reference book nowadays, looking things up as needed.

The Complete Lenormand Oracle Handbook, by Caitlyn Matthews. Not for the beginner, nor the faint at heart, this one details a lot of what, to me, seem to be more advanced approaches and techniques. I use this book a lot, and I think anyone else will enjoy it, too. Good information on the connection between Lenormand and traditional playing cards, too.

Cartomancy with Lenormand and the Tarot, by Patrick Dunn. This is more of a special topic book, and best read after you’ve got some familiarity with both Tarot and Lenormand. It’s all about using them in tandem and the synergy between them.

Astrology

The Luminaries, by Liz Greene. I could really recommend anything by this author, but she’s written so much, and this book is a particularly important one. It focuses entirely on the Sun and Moon in astrology, and gives a good look at why the luminaries need to have a special place in your understanding.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Practical Astrology, by Priscilla Costello. This is focused, as you might expect, on actual interpretation of charts and less on theory, but it gives a good background on that, too. Was quite helpful in my attempts to interpret @xepsurah‘s unusual natal chart.

The Complete Book of Astrology, by Kris Brandt Riske. Very beginner, and very light on intellect, heavy on intuition. A great introduction, but I would not suggest it as the only book you read if you’re really interested in the subject.

Tasseography

Tea Leaf Reading for Beginners, by Caroline Dow. There are only a few books within Llewellyn’s immensely popular “For Beginners” series that I would recommend, and this is one of them. The symbol glossary (which makes up the bulk of the book) is the most useful part.

Tea Cup Reading, by Sasha Fenton. This book goes into some detail (quite a bit, actually) about the history of tea and coffee, and, better yet, how to prepare them in the traditional fashion! A lot of traditional lore is described, as well.

Scrying, etc.

Scrying for Beginners, by Donald Tyson. This is really a surprise find, as I don’t usually expect much from this series, by Tyson knows his history and goes far beyond simple exercises for scrying. He is a bit biased towards mirror and crystal-gazing techniques, but does discuss other methods.

Psychic Development for Beginners, by William Hewitt. Readable, and offers some very practical developmental exercises for those wishing to hone extrasensory abilities. Be prepared to sort through a lot of woo, though.

AU MASTER LIST

So here is a bunch of AU’s that I’ve collected over…. a long time. Enjoy

Awkward Meetings

  • I broke your nose in a mosh pit, sorry
  • I hit you with my car and was the only one to visit you in the hospital, this is sort of awkward, are you okay?
  • You’re getting chased by the police and you just jumped in my car and yelled drive, wtf man
  • You just punched me in the face while gesturing wildly to a friend, your friend can’t stop laughing and im too shocked to respond to your apologies
  • You laughed in a restaurant, but your laugh is really weird and I thought you were choking so I’m awkwardly humping you while attempting to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre and why isn’t this working, you’re just choking harder now this is aweful
  • We met on a Sunday morning, both doing our walk of shame
  • I get really sick on roller-coasters and you are sitting in front of me, im so sorry
  • You’re the bastard who keeps parking in front of my house and you just caught me drawing a dick on your window with a permanent marker… ugh, oops.
  • I work at a department store and if you take out and unfold another fucking shirt and just leave it, I’m going to fucking shove it down your throat
  • You broke into my apartment drunk thinking it was your friends place and I should call the cops by my cat likes you so????
  • You’re my new dealer and you just friended me on Facebook and idk how to react to that
  • You saw me reading the same book you are and now we are arguing about the motives of the antagonist
  • This is a five-hour-long plane ride, we’re sitting together and  you’re deathly afraid of flying. 
  • I got into a cab to find someone already inside
  • You thought I was your friend/sister
  • Holy shit, im in the wrong car.
  • I was walking by a roller coaster and your shoe flew off and hit me in the head and now I’m on the floor trying not to fall unconscious.
  • It’s 2am and I’m drunk and I need some salt for my fries and I know your awake so OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR
  • You fell asleep on me in the subway and I should probably wake you up and its my stop next stop but it’s okay, I can always just catch the subway back…
  • I know nothing about camping and all my friends left me at the site. Please, help me, I think I just heard a bear
  • This has been a shitty week and you just grabbed the last box of my favourite comfort food from the shelf, do you really want to fight me rn?
  • We met in a movie theatre and now you’re clinging to me because your terrified and I’m okay with that because it means I get your popcorn.
  • You had a party and I got really drunk and stole your microwave, so now I’m at your place and your super hungover so here, I made breakfast?

Neighbour/Roomate

  • The guy living below me has a really loud alarm clock that always wakes me up at the crack of dawn
  • I went to investigate a scream and found my neighbour standing on a chair to avoid a rat/mouse/cricket (etc.)
  • My neighbour has a really squeaky bed and my bedroom is below theirs
  • You keep stealing my doormat and HAH, I’ve got you this time thief!
  • The apartment above me has left their tap on or something and water is leaking through my ceiling
  • My neighbour’s sibling got the wrong house number and barged into my apartment on accident.
  • My roommate keeps stealing my coffee so now I make extra 
  • You’re my new neighbour and wow man, you have some really weird habits.
  • You’re my neighbour and you are stealing my wifi to watch porn and can you not?
  • You locked yourself outside of your apartment and there’s a storm rolling in and I pity you so please come into my apartment I’ll make you hot chocolate?
  • I heard you singing at 3 am and joined in and now you’re at my door and wtf mate I think your drunk but your voice is really nice so?
  • I just set the fire alarm in our building off again… sorry. I know its like the fourth time this week…
  • You keep mowing your lawn when I’m trying to sleep and seriously FUCK YOU
  • My new neighbour is really hot and wow I didn’t even like women until now? And now she is in the garden planting flowers in her bikini wow… im in too deep
  • It’s 3 am and you’re blasting off classic rock at full volume and your music taste might be awesome but soME PEOPLE are trying to sLEEP
  • We’ve never met but we shower at the same time and our showers are on opposite sides of the same apartment wall so sometimes we start duets?

Pets

  • I’m out walking and my dog started chasing your dog. 
  • My cat/dog ran away and you just found it but refuse to accept the reward. 
  • We are neighbours and your cat got my cat pregnant… so, wanna raise this little kitty family?
  • My pet tarantula/snake (etc) escaped and I forgot to warn the guy below me who is terrified of snakes/spiders
  • I need you to pet sit my pet for a while and I forgot to mention it’s a snake, the mice are in the freezer. Thanks, bye
  • My cat really hates you cat and that’s the third time this week I’ve had to pry them apart.
  • My cat keeps breaking into your apartment and it ate all your plants… dinner to make up for it?
  • My cat sneaked out on the balcony and into your open window and he has this habit of destroying furniture and pissing everywhere so I followed him inside and you cam home earlier than I expected and found me in the middle of your living room and honestly I’m not a burglar
  • Your dog likes me a thousand times better than she likes your partner and sorry not sorry I love this dog
  • You were walking your dog when you found me passed out on a park bench and thank you for waking me up and buying coffee instead of stealing my wallet

Music

  • I’m on a bus and wow, you’re singing really loudly and everyone is giving you weird looks, hey bud, tone it down, also great choice in music
  • You play Double Bass/Cello and I play 1st chair Violin and we keep making eye contact and damn your super cute.
  • You play in an orchestra and I love these songs so much, plus you’re really cute. Shit man, you’ll never notice me in the huge crowd…
  • Music is kinda illegal and my friend just died and apparently he wrote music and wow I want to know what it sounds like and to play it at his funeral but I don’t know how to. You’re a well-known music dealer, do you happen to understand these notes? Can you help me?
  • I tried to act cool at this concert and I thought I was leaning on a wall but apparently it was a speaker and now it’s on the ground in pieces and everyone’s glaring at me… sorry?

Supernatural

  • I’m a wizard and I just accidently apparated into your house. Oops.
  • I died over 2000 years ago and you’ve been dead for like 2 hours, man, damn it now I have to explain this shit to you. Great.
  • I’m immortal and you’re mortal and I don’t know how to explain this to you and soon enough you’re going to realise that I’m not aging… shiiittt
  • You’re a greek god and I’m the roman counterpart. 
  • I’m a ghost and your alive and I think I’m in love with you…. Fuck. 
  • You’re a faun and I’m a Satry
  • I’m half demon and people often judge me based on my looks, but your blind and wow you actually like me? 
  • I’m a time traveller and I went back in time and wow I think I’m in love with you, fuck this isn’t good, I just faked being George Washington… wait what? George Washington doesn’t exist here? Shit… I actually am George Washington.
  • I’m a writer and your my character and wtf how the heck did you just literally climb out of my first draft? 
  • I’m a werewolf but I don’t want to tell you because my wolf form might be that really small chihuahua you keep mentioning you see when I go out…
  • I’m an android and you’re a human and wow what is that warmth I feel when I see you?
  • I’m a homesick telepath and you’re the poor soul who is receiving all these emotions, sorry
  • Somehow I’m in your body and you’re in mine and shit man being this close to the ground is fucked up.
  • I’m a genie an d you rubbed my lamp so congrats you get three wishes but you can’t seem to think of shit and why the fuck do I have to be stuck with you? Hurry up and think of some wishes okay?
  • I was an awful angel and as punishment I have to be your guardian angel and wow your super cute and nice but I still hate you
  • You keep having strange dreams that turn out to be us in a past life and you’re determined to fine me again but in this life I’m already dead.
  • We live in the year 3090, you’re a scientist and I’m your assistant. Unfortunately and experiment goes wrong and I die. Now you’re trying to put my brain into a robot but its not the same
  • I’m a vampire and I have a moment of weakness, you’re nearby and lets just say it doesn’t end well
  • I’m a dragon and you’re a really hot prince, that’s right, they locked up the wrong royalty.
  • You’re a pirate and I’m a siren and woah… are you asexual? That’s so cool, hey wait, don’t go I just want to talk
  • Your mirror is a doorway into my dimension and I can see everything…. 
  • Listen I am genetically modified and you WILL let me hide in your house
  • Ok, so I panicked and kissed this human so he wouldn’t drown. And I know you don’t want me to keep him, and we can’t let him leave if he knows about us mere people so what do you want to do?

School/College

  • I just got partnered with you in dance class and I can’t dance for shit
  • You’re my science lab partner and how the fuck did you just explode that beaker?
  • I’m an art student and you just found my sketchbook and you’re going through it. Shit man can you give that back, I don’t care how good you think they are just don’t turn that page…
  • You’re the school dork and I’m the school jock and fuck you can see where this is going
  • We are the only two kids who ride this school bus, maybe we should carpool?
  • I thought you were my roomies new boyfriend so I invited you in but your actually the RA of the dorm and now you think I want to have sex with you
  • I accidently flooded the laundry room and you really need to do laundry
  • You’re sitting in my seat in this lecture and who even are you? I’ve never seen you before… wait what, stop checking me out!
  • We argued so much during a class discussion that we both got kicked out and we’re still arguing outside the class
  • You left your USB in the library computer and I had to go through your files to figure out who you are and in the end I read the entirety of this book you’re working on and wow you’re really good?
  • I’m a traditional painter who has to take a basic Photoshop class, you’re a graphic design major sitting next to me and getting sucked into helping me out because Im so shitty at this
  • My pottery bowl exploded in the kiln and I feel like a failure, you found me crying about it in the hallway and are now trying to comfort me and your sweater is really soft wow sorry
  • You and your friends have been playing the penis game in the library for the last five minutes and none of you have gotten above a quiet yell and fuck it I’m trying to study over her so fuck you I’m going to put an end to this game by winning 
  • We are both teachers and at the end of the year we compare how many gifts we’ve received from student and you’ve won for the past three years
  • Romeo and Juliet of the math and English departments 
  • I want to get along with you roomie… but I like star wars… and you like star trek… this isn’t going to work.
  • I usually talk to my friends through morse code in class but… apparently you know morse too… and now you know I think your butt is cute
  • I got cursed and turned into an animal and taken to the shelter and now I’m being adopted by someone who is really hot OH FUCKING NO

Near Death Experiences

  • Wow I was just in a fatal accident and who the hell are you? What is this I’m I dying? Wait no, I don’t want this, how do I get out of it? A deal you say, I’ll take it.
  • You’re an executioner and I’m about to be executed but you can’t seem to run the guillotine, wait what, why are we running away, man you’re my favourite executioner
  • Our plane/boat crashed and now it’s just us on this island. 
  • I just took a super dangerous job and your trying to talk me out of it, but we really need the money
  • It’s the middle of a war and I’m on a ship that you’re ship just torpedoed. Now I’m a prisoner and wow why can’t I feel my legs. I’m not cooperating until I can feel them again. What the fuck do you mean I’m paralysed?
  • I’m addicted to ____ (drugs/alcohol etc) and you found me in an alleyway due to after effects of my addiction (beat up, overdose etc) and decide to take me in.
  • I sold my soul to bring you back to life and I don’t have long left please make this time count

Mistaken and Secret Identities

  • I’m  a thief/hacker/murder and you’ve found out my identity and have been bugging me for days to take you on as your partner
  • I’m a superhero and you want to be like me but in doing so become a supervillain, what do you mean you don’t understand why I’m punching you?
  • I’m a superhero, you’re a supervillain, but we don’t know each other’s identities and we are actually best friends
  • I’m runaway royalty and you’re a commoner, fuck I’m so screwed I need your help, I’ll explain later
  • You think I’m a celebrity and you’re talking too much for me to explain I am defintely not… that dude. What was his name again?
  • You’re a superhero and I’m your best friend and what the fuck man? Why the hell didn’t you tell me? If you had maybe I would be fucking caught with this stupid ass monologue-ing villain
  • I have a very cute neighbour and very thin walls and one day I call you and err… your moans are very synchronised with my neighbour's…
  • I’m a superhero and you’re a supervillain and I saw you visiting kids at the children’s hospital and letting them act like they defeated you and now it’s really hard to punch you in the face

Profession Based

  • Your my mailman and I can’t help but notice that you linger at my door slightly longer than you need to ever since you saw me that one time. Do you want to come inside?
  • I’m a private detective and your my client and fuck man you’re in some deep shit
  • You’re a protester and I’m a police officer. Seriously can you please calm down a little bit, this is my job not my  beliefs.
  • I’m a make-up artist/hair stylist and I you’re an actor/model and are you flirting or???
  • You’re a celebrity and sorry mate, I have to take pictures to pay rent, I know its invasive seriously, sorry
  • You’re a store clerk and fuck, is that my ex? Can I please hide behind this counter?
  • You’re a lifeguard at my kid’s swimming competition and I fell in the pool with all my clothes on and you awkwardly tried to save me even though I didn’t need it.
  • You work at a pet store and I came in to look at tarantulas but somehow we lost the biggest one and its loose somewhere in the store and it really doesn’t help that you’re terrified of spiders
  • I’m a firefighter and you started a fire in your kitchen but you’re still flirting with me even though you’re not wearing pants and I’m carrying you down a ladder. Stop complimenting my muscles for fucks sake
  • We work at the same company and I kind of had a crush on you until I noticed that you’re the asshole stealing my lunch from the office fridge.
  • I’m a firefighter and you live near the station I work at and we talk/flirt with each other a lot. One day me and my team get called to put out a fire and it’s your home ablaze. You don’t make it.
  • I work at a fruit store and you come in almost every day and rearrange stuff on the shelves and then leave. Today you made the apples spell ‘call me’
  • It’s 2am and I was just trying to get home but I left my sunroof open all day and now there’s a squirrel in my car and it scared me and I drove into a pole - stop laughing! You’re a cop, aren’t you supposed to be helping?
  • You’re drunk and want my name tattooed on your ass.
  • You always bring your dates to the restaurant I wait at and now you’re here alone… you okay mate?

Winter Times

  • It’s snowing and I usually walk to work but that’s not happening, hey roomie, can you please drive me? Yes I know its 4am
  • I accidently gave all my winter clothes to charity over the summer and not its not so much summer, but I’m broke and hey… could you give me your old winter clothes… maybe?
  • I love the cold, but I promised to visit you for a good 4 months and wow, why did I do this? There isn’t snow here?
  • I don’t know you, but you just threw a snowball at my face, mate, its on.
  • I don’t know who the hell you are, but my roommate has someone over and It’s really cold outside…. Can I come in? Or like, have a blanket, or even a towel?

Old Friends

  • I knew you in high school and I ran into you at a renaissance fair wearing full knight regalia
  • I met you once when I was 12, we started a pen-pal relationship across the world and haven’t stopped even though we are a lot older now. 
  • You were my best friend when we were younger but your family moved to the other side of the world, and we haven’t talked in years. But now your back and wow how did you recognise me when I can’t even remember your name?

Fake Dating

  • I hired you to be my date for a wedding but your super cute, maybe we cannot fake-date? 
  • I’m fake dating you to have someone to vent to on family gatherings while also pissing off my conservative uncle that I never liked and wow… have your eyes always been this nice?
  • We’re both cosplayers and we somehow always manage to meet each other at cons dressed as a popular ship and people always want photos of us in compromising positions and so we always end up fake-dating the entire day but you’re actually really hot and I’m head over heels for you
  • My friend dragged me to this party and I just saw my ex, quick make out with me, I’ll pay you.

Miscellaneous

  • I’m blind and wow your voice is absolutely beautiful can you just keep talking? Forever? Please?
  • My younger sibling is besties with your sibling and even though we hate each other I guess we’ve got to start hanging out a little
  • We are both at a grocery store at am and you offered to arm wrestle me for the last box of cereal, its on!
  • You’re sleeping on my best friend’s couch while your house is being renovated and you have really weird habits like attempting to sing opera in the shower and you keep eating all my Nutigrain 
  • We bump into each other every Friday at the supermarket to buy the same ice-cream and maybe we should eat it together?
  • Our parents are dating and thank god I’m not the only one pissed off about this
  • I went to museum to get some inspiration and then I saw you staring at one of the paintings in awe and wow you just noticed me drawing you and this is awkward
  • I decide to take a shortcut home that involves crawling through a really tight hole in a fence and I end up getting stuck and you just happened to pass by and now you’re laughing at me
  • I took a bunch of free condoms from health services just because I could and they all fell out of my bag at once and now you’re staring at me weirdly
  • We are trapped in a bank during a robbery
  • Your country is trying to take over mine and I might be a little attracted to you and stop this it’s really hard to retaliate okay?
  • I was on my balcony and you started loudly quoting romeo and juliet at me

“I see you eating whatever you want and not exercising” - Pants

Dear girl trying to get back in shape,

I know it’s hard. I know the hardest thing you may do all day is walk into the gym. I know how easy it is to want to give up and go eat Chicken McNuggets, but don’t do it. I know it feels like you work so hard and get no where. I know how frustrating it is to see that person across the table from you eat a Big Mac every day while you eat your carrots and still be half of your size. I know that awful feeling where you don’t want to go to the gym because you know how out of shape you are. Trust me, I know.

The important thing is you are doing something about it. I’m sure you get mad at yourself for letting your body get this out of shape, but life happens. You have made a huge accomplishment by not having a soda in over a month, and those small changes are huge. I understand how hard it is, I understand how frustrating it is to not see results and I understand why you want to give up. Being healthy and fit takes so much time. As much as I wish you could wake up the day after a good workout with the 6 pack of your dreams, that just isn’t the reality. If being healthy was easy, everyone would do it, and it wouldn’t feel so good when you got there.

Remember how last January your resolution was to get back in the gym and get healthy again? Think about how incredible you would look right now if you would have stuck with it. The great thing is that you can start any time, and you can prove yourself wrong.

Tired of starting over? Then don’t give up.

You are only as strong as your mind. You will get there one day. Just be patient and keep working.

— 

The Odyssey Online

Originally posted by quicksilver123456

I can’t believe those parents from that daddyofive channel are straight up blaming Phil for all the flack they’re getting???

Nobody is reacting the way they are to them because of what Phil said. He didn’t have to say anything, the clips from their own channel spoke for themselves. All Phil did was see kids potentially in danger and blew the whistle on it. What kind of person would he be to look away from children in need?

They’re claiming the videos are fake, which I don’t buy, but even if they faked the videos, I don’t understand what kind of reaction they expected? How do you put up videos of you yelling at, cussing at, and man handling your kids and not expect someone to try to jump in and defend those kids? It’s already fucking wild to me that it went on so long before someone finally said something.

Fake or not, you sat there and filmed, edited, and posted these videos, not seeing anything wrong with the content, and that’s still a huge fucking problem. It was aggressive, abusive, disturbing, and not in the least bit funny. You can’t just be like “but they’re for entertainment!” and be absolved of everything. The fact that they think that’s entertainment in and of itself is concerning to me.

Whatever, I dunno, I just thinking blaming someone else for being genuinely scared for your children instead of stepping back and being able to understand what you did wrong is a cop out.

nothing hurt more than when I saw a picture of you and her. You barely ever took photos with me, let alone post them. And here you were posting pictures with this girl you barely knew, and I tried not to hate her, I tried not to hate you. But my insides felt like they were ripping apart at the sight of  you. And I knew this was going to happen eventually, I guess I was just hoping it wouldn’t.  
and its just so fucking pathetic, while I’ve spent all this time missing you.. you spent it with her. You never even thought of me once.
And all I can fucking do is imagine the way that you talk to her, its probably the same way I talked to you., like you were made out of the sun or something.
And I just don’t fucking understand how one person can leave such a huge mark on you when you can’t even leave a fucking scratch on them. Because you left me and I still see you every fucking where, and I never made you feel a damn thing. you never even cared for me.
I just want it to stop, I want it all to stop. I want to stop feeling every burning fire for you. I want to stop thinking of every word you said to me, I want to stop analyzing every little part of our relationship in trying to figure out where the fuck we went wrong because I get it now. I understand..
a relationship is always doomed to end in heartbreak when there is one person who loves more and in our case, I was always the one who loved more, and now it just hurts so bad because you love her. You love her even though I wanted you to love me.. even though I gave you every fucking piece of me. You chose her.
It will never be me and you. I was never enough, and the thought of that alone breaks me into a million pieces, so how the fuck am I supposed to feel when I realize why I wasn’t enough. When I see the face of the girl who was enough..
—  I don’t think I’ll ever get over you

For some context, in the Campaign I’m DMing we’ve been stuck in a maze of caves in search of a missing child, the party comes across two skeleton Minotaurs which I planned to be mini bosses. The party are very underprepared for the fight.

Bard(ooc): “uh- can I insult the Minotaur?”

Me: “sure, though I’m not sure it’ll do much”

*Bard uses vicious mockery, rolls a Nat 1*

Bard(ooc): “Shit, that’s not good.”

Me: “well, before your impending doom, what did you say to the skeleton?”

Bard: “I fine you quite… Humerus.”

Me: “… What?”

Bard(ooc): “I flirt when I panic”

Warlock(ooc): “How do you manage that?”

Bard(ooc): “I am capable of nonsense”

Druid(ooc): “that wasn’t even flirting”

*I roll for wisdom and didn’t beat the mark by a huge gap*

Me: “Well, the Minotaur doesn’t quite understand what you said, but it was flattered anyway. Congrats you just seduced a pile of bones”

Bard(ooc): “Oh shit, well um… Do I have a charisma bonus on her now?”

Me(ooc): “I guess so. Also the other Minotaur was her husband, he is now jealous and wants to kill you, plus he has a strength bonus on you.”

Bard: “Aw shit. Uh- I’m running behind this rock, I’m not moving and no one can tell me otherwise”

Knight: “Help us you coward!”

Bard: “you probably got this!”

*a round passes and it is the Bard’s turn again, the rest of the party are almost dead*

Barbarian: “so our fate rests with the bard?”

Warlock: “Our journey is over.”

Bard: “I convince the skeleton to kill her husband, and then herself”

Me(ooc): “wait what?”

Bard: “you heard me! Don’t question it sky narrator!”

*she rolls 18 persuasion. I roll a 5 wisdom and sigh in defeat*

Me: “She proceeds to decapitate the other skeleton, and then herself. The two collapse in a heap of bones. You’ve won.”

Barbarian(ooc): “you can’t be serious”

Druid(ooc): “Never thought I’d see the day that ‘Bard’ actually helps us in a fight.”

Knight(ooc): “We won by telling it to go kill itself.”

Bard: “I play my victory song on my sacbutt(trombone)”

*my friend proceeds to pull out her actual trombone and play Final Countdown as me and the rest of the party contemplate our life choices*

A Study in Hypocrisy #2.2

Or why the Avengers’ relationship to Tony was unhealthy at best, Steve isn’t fit to be a leader, and why I’m Team Iron Man to the end.


WHY TONY’S RELATIONSHIP WITH THE AVENGERS IS UNHEALTHY AT BEST

Tony’s relationship with the Avengers has always made me uncomfortable. For the longest time, I couldn’t put my finger on why exactly, but I’ll try to organize my thoughts in this series.  

This post was getting far too long, so I decided to cut it into parts, one per Avenger.


STEVE

Steve’s relationship with Tony is bathed in hypocrisy and double standards right off the bat. When Steve meets Bruce, he tells him that he doesn’t care about his reputation and will essentially make up his own mind about what kind of person he is from what he sees as they work together. 

Yet he doesn’t apply that very same standard to Tony, instantly judging and comparing him to Bucky. 

Big man in a suit of armor. Take that away, what are you?

[…]

I know men with none of that worth ten of you.

Avengers (2012)

Where does Steve get off judging Tony like this? Reading a file doesn’t give him intimate knowledge of who Tony is as a person. And his fortune has nothing to do with who he is inside. Indeed, it sounds like he holds Tony’s fortune (which he worked hard to build—whatever people may think, SI’s products didn’t invent themselves) against him. Which makes no sense? 

In Winter Soldier, we see quickly enough that neither Steve nor Natasha trust Tony. When they show up at Sam’s, they promptly tell him everyone they know wants to kill them, which is so absurdly stupid and wrong I have no words for it. Tony would never ally with HYDRA. Tony designed the freaking helicarriers. Hell, he’s a tech genius. He was the obvious choice in this case! He could have provided them with a safe house, any supplies they needed, backup and unlimited technical help. 

But do you think they went to him? 

Nooo. And why? Apart from “they’re stupid and Marvel didn’t want to pay for RDJ,” because Steve already knew about the Winter Soldier killing Tony’s parents. They could have avoided dumping all of SHIELD’s files on the internet. They could have protected the hundreds of undercover agents who were caught unawares once their legends were blown. They could have protected those agents’ families. They could have protected the agents who weren’t undercover, but still carrying out missions at the time. They could have avoided the crazy damage caused by three giant flying machines shooting each other out of the sky right over Washington DC. There would have been considerably less loss of life had Tony been involved. 

And yet they chose to keep him out of it. 

And here’s where it starts to get very sour, and where I get very, very bitter. 

Around rolls Age of Ultron and Steve is so, so quick in putting the blame on Tony. Like everyone else, he promptly forgets Bruce’s involvement, and makes Tony the sole culprit. After 3 years fighting side by side, he doesn’t even give him the benefit of the doubt. He doesn’t pause to think of somebody other than his precious little self and wonder if, maybe, he’s not so special after all and others might have experienced visions, too. 

Nope. No, it’s evil, it’s bad, so it’s gotta be Tony’s fault. 

Then, there’s the culmination of his hypocrisy: “Sometimes, my teammates don’t tell me things.” 

Okay. First, who the fuck do you think you are, asshole? You don’t get to demand that your teammates tell you everything? What the hell! Nobody owes you anything whatsoever. 

Second, who the fuck do you think you are to demand complete transparency after keeping the secret of said teammate’s parents’ death for over a year? 

This pissed me off. so. damn. much. 

Pardon my French. 

The sheer hypocrisy, people. The balls! 

Now then. What about trusting freaking Wanda Maximoff over your teammate? She suddenly realizes that she’s gonna die too if the world ends, switches to your side out of sheer convenience and self interest, and after 30 seconds you take her advice that “Stark is evil” like she’s the Messiah? Wow. It must be nice to be so convinced of your own self-righteousness. 

Finally, Civil War

Let’s forget about the fact that Steve probably didn’t read the Accords. The entire thing has to have taken place over the course of, what… a week at most? Starting with the introduction of the Accords. There is no way in hell Steve—or anyone else on his team, really—would have managed to read and understand a piece of legislation as complex as the Accords in that time. No way. Which means that he heard a vague description of it and said “no” for… what reason again? 

But I digress. 

Tony offers compromises. He works his ass off to come up with a way to wipe Steve and Sam’s record clean, and to offer Bucky therapy instead of prison. He keeps reaching out, over and over again, only to have his hand slapped away by Rogers. But unlike Rogers, Tony doesn’t dismiss Steve’s claims that there are other Winter Soldiers. He investigates the information and then, because his heart is too big for his own good, he still goes to Siberia to help. 

And there are 5 more super soldiers just like him. I can’t let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can’t.

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Because where Steve says “I,” Tony says “we.” Because Tony Stark, who “doesn’t play well with others,” is the one who keeps reaching out and trying to move as a team. Because Steve, who keeps preaching about fighting “together” and not having secrets, keeps his tightly under wraps. Again, do you think Sam and Bucky were aware of Tony’s deal? 

Back on topic, Tony goes to Siberia to help Steve, who then proceeds to invalidate his trauma and pain at seeing his parents die in front of his eyes. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, of course Tony’s not stupid and realizes that Steve knew. But instead of confessing, Steve lies to his face all. over. again.

I will not even go into that condescending letter, which could be summarized like follows: “I’m sorry you don’t understand that I was right and you were wrong, and if you’re prepared to beg for forgiveness and freely offer your house, your toys and your money to me again, I might just, after some time, agree to forgive you. P.S.: How is it, being all by yourself in that huge place?”  

Steve is a hypocritical, holier-than-thou asshole and needs a kick where the sun don’t shine. Tony better not forgive anyone until they grovel for at least 10 years. 


ETA: Also, that “I could do this all day” line infuriated me to no end. Implying that Tony’s being a bully when he’s just been stabbed in the back by his teammates while he was trying to do what was right is downright petty, stupid, awful and shitty


Masterpost

Part 1

Part 2.1: Natasha | Part 2.2: Steve | Part 2.3: Thor

Title: Family

Warnings: None

Author’s Note:  Lots of requests for the Seguin imagine. (I’ll post the Monahan one tomorrow!) The POV switches between (Y/N) and Tyler. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think!

Links: My Master List  and My Current Requests

All Parts: (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)


You were lounging on the sofa with Tyler, a movie playing softly on the television. Snuggled into his chest; his arms were fastened securely around your waist, his chin resting on the top of your head. It was getting late and you’d have to leave soon, but you were enjoying your time alone with Tyler. You heard the patter of small footsteps coming down the hallway; turning your heads you saw Tyler’s son, Charlie, appeared in the doorway dragging a worn fleece blanket behind him.

“Daddy, I had a nightmare.” he sniffled; the lashes covering his bright brown eyes were damp with tears. Gosh, did that little boy look like his daddy.

“It’s alright, Charlie.” he said as he slipped his arms from your waist and stood up. “I’ll be right back.” he whispered to you, placing a soft kiss to your forehead.

You watched as Tyler knelt down next to his son and spoke comforting words to him in a hushed voice before scooping him up in his arms and carrying him back to his room. You loved watching the two of them together.

Tyler and Charlie’s mother hadn’t planned on having a baby. After the birth she had left Tyler with sole custody and hadn’t been in touch since. In the four years since then, Tyler had taken it upon himself to be the best parent possible; growing up a lot himself during that time. He didn’t like letting people into the safe and sheltered world he had created for Charlie; unwilling to expose his son to other people who may or may not stick around. You had been dating for a little under a year, and you had managed to earn Tyler’s trust and he let you in. Sort of. Although you had spent time with Charlie, Tyler didn’t let you get too close. You knew how protective Tyler was and you didn’t want to push anything on him.

You stood up with a yawn and began gathering your things as Tyler came sauntering back into the living room and flopped down on the sofa.

“Hey babe, I’m going to head home.” you said, picking your bag off the floor. As you turned to face him he sighed loudly, rubbing his hands down his face. “Tyler, what’s wrong?” you asked, sitting beside him, rubbing a hand across his broad shoulders.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do with Charlie when we go on our trip next week. His normal sitter is on vacation; my parents and sisters are really busy right now, they can’t fly in.” he said tiredly. “I hate leaving him with new sitters; he doesn’t do well with people he doesn’t know; especially with the nightmares he’s been having recently.” he explained, closing his eyes in frustration.

“He knows me, I could watch him.” you stated simply. You suddenly realized what you had said and your mouth dropped open, surprised at your own words.

Tyler’s eyes flew open and he stared at you, his eyes studying your face. You couldn’t read his expression and it worried you. Did he think you were trying to force yourself into their lives? Didn’t he trust you enough to leave his child in your care?

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I don’t want to make you feel like I’m intruding—” you began nervously.

“No, no, no.” Tyler said, cutting you off. He sat up straighter and placed a hand gently on your knee. “Do you really want to watch him? I don’t want you to feel like you have to. I know you’re busy with work and everything else going on in your life right now.”

“I really do, Tyler. I’ll switch my schedule to work around his pre-school hours. You’ll only be gone for a little over a week. I’d like to get to know Charlie better.” you said, offering him a small smile. “If you’ll let me.” you added quickly.

“You want to get to know Charlie better?” Tyler asked.

“Of course I do. I love you Tyler, and Charlie is a huge part of your life. We’ve been together for almost a year, and I plan on sticking around; I think it’d be good for us to know each other better.” you said, praying Tyler would understand how much you wanted him to fully let you into their lives.

Tyler bit his lower lip; once again he stared at you. Before any worrisome thoughts could cross your mind, Tyler wrapped his arms around you and pulled you to his chest; one hand caressing your back, the other wound through your hair, keeping you close to him.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” he murmured into your hair.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

*curtsies* Duke, I need some help here. Just noticed that I have a huge lack on my character creation. I only write the "warmey hearted and happy" characters. How can I... "fix" that? I have interest in writing different characters but... I just... can't. It's like I didn't understand them enough. How do I write a cold and calculist character? Without making it either a "happey heart" or unrealist, or even the "completly feelingless stereotype"? Please help me!!! I have no idea of what to do!!!!

*Curtsies* First big rule of writing that Tumblr brainwashes out of people because we tend to balk at anything ‘problematic’: 

You need conflict in fiction. 

If everybody is nice to each other and agrees about everything and never miscommunicates, you don’t have a story. You have slow-burn fluff fic and that’s fine if that’s what you’re trying to write, but if you aren’t, you need to spice things up. You need problems. You need conflict. You need more than one personality type. 

Writing good characters is hard. You are literally inventing a human being from scratch, and that kind of complexity takes months (if not years) of work to create, so that’s the first thing I want to be clear about: 

There are no shortcuts to good character.

Writing is, in every sense, an iceberg type of art form, and what a reader will eventually see on a page is only about 1% of the work you actually have to do to make that 1% worth reading. Character, like plot and setting and everything else in fiction, requires long hard nose-to-the-grindstone hours of work. It also requires research. You can’t skimp on any of this or your characters will come out feeling like paper dolls. 

As for how to actually excavate a character: I’ve talked a lot about this under the character development tag and especially this post here, but here is what I think should be the first step for everyone who’s trying to turn a paper doll into flesh and blood: 

Start with the moment where your character first appears in your story, and work backward through every remotely significant event of their life until you get to their birth.

By ‘every remotely significant event’ I don’t just mean when their mom died or when they lost their virginity. I mean every event that was remotely significant to them, even if it was just getting their braces off or listening to their favorite band for the first time. If you really commit to this, it’s going to raise a lot of questions along the way. How long did they live in Kenosha? Where did she get that dress? Why did her dad lose that job? Who introduced her to that author? Here’s the crucial thing: 

Nothing you learn about a character is insignificant. 

Even if it’s just what their least favorite vegetable is. 99% of this information will not end up in the final manuscript, and that’s fine. What’s important is that you know it, because a character (like a real human being) is the sum of their parts, and even their childhood aversion to cooked carrots will contribute to who they become. I recently got a question on my author blog about why I can spit out so many random trivial details about each of my main characters. And the answer is because none of it’s random and none of it’s trivial. If you’re trying to bring a person to life with prose, you can’t afford not to know every little thing about them. Want to know why? 

It is a hell of a lot easier to write a character you know as well as you know yourself than to write a character you only know as a player in your story.

Characters have lives before and beyond the book you’re writing, just like real people have lives before and beyond the moments you interact with them. Our life experiences shape who we are and how we behave, so if you don’t know everything that has occurred in this character’s life prior to this moment, how could you possibly know how they would respond to a question even as simple as “How are you?” So. Spend the time. It will not be time wasted. Writing requires patience. 

Writing also requires research. Because you can’t just write a bunch of characters who are vague avatars for yourself, you will have to venture out of your comfort zone. If you do that thing I suggested where you plot each person’s life all the way back to their birth, you will inevitably stumble across things you don’t fully understand–and that’s where the research comes in. You have a hard time writing cold, calculating characters? Start with the basic questions: Why is this person this way? Coming up empty? Find some real-life examples. If you’re writing a serial killer, go buy every biography of real-life serial killers you can get your hands on. Watch Making a Murderer. Take a criminal psychology class. Writing about a chef? Read chefs’ memoirs. Follow chefs’ blogs. Go to restaurants. Learn to cook. Don’t steal any real person’s personality wholesale, but pay attention to patterns and details so that when you create your own character, they feel real. 

Use the real world for research. Learn from life.

The most important lesson you can learn from life is that very few people can be easily categorized. Most exist somewhere on a moral/behavioral spectrum that doesn’t fit neatly into those Myers-Briggs boxes everyone here on Tumblr loves so much. People are complicated and often conditional. A character who is warm-hearted and loving is much less interesting and much less believable than a character who is warm-hearted and loving but only towards children, because we immediately want to know more about her and why she doesn’t have the same sympathy for people her own age. And let’s be honest: no real person is warm-hearted and loving all the time. Figuring out exactly how this person’s life has gone will help you decide how they behave in any given situation.

We all have quirks and idiosyncrasies and learned behaviors that may, at first glance, defy explanation. We have hopes and fears and secrets and none of that is stuff you’re going to discover by taking another MBTI test on a character’s behalf. Rifle through the stuff of their life until you know not only exactly which magazines are lying under their bed but also why they have five credit cards they aren’t telling their wife about. When it comes to character, you can never know enough, even though writing in broad strokes might look a lot easier at the outset. Nothing about writing is easy, characters included.

People are messy. Resist the urge to simplify them.

Put the work in. I promise you, doing the digging and the research and learning who a person is before you try to put them on paper will make every word you write about them come more naturally and make more sense. And though a reader may never see those notebooks crammed full of every minute thing you learned about their life, they can intrinsically tell the difference between paper dolls and characters who are three-dimensional and fully formed and have been turned inside out by their author. 

Really all this advice comes down to one thing, which is that you can’t half-ass character. You’re creating a person. 

Commit.

Random YOI Thought/Headcanon

So this is extremely random, but imagine Yuuri secretly learning Russian, surprising Viktor one day when he just casually starts talking the language. Viktor is overwhelmed by the fact that Yuuri had gone out of his way to learn to speak his native language. He, of course, isn’t fluent and so Viktor helps him out by starting to hold small simple conversations in Russian to get Yuuri accustomed to both speaking and listening to the language. The best part for Viktor is that most of the phrases that Yuuri had learnt on his own were ways of expressing love. Of course Viktor gushes to Chris about this (who immediately wants to give Yuuri French lessons) and Viktor uses every opportunity to brag about it to anyone and everyone. Including his fans via his social media.

A day after posting about it and how adorable his fiancé is, Yuuri gets a message from Phitchit.

“You never said you were learning Russian!!!” Yuuri is confused by how Phitchit came to know of his studying, but suspects that Viktor has something to do with it.

“Yes, I’ve been practicing with Viktor”

“That’s so sweet of you! Your boy is v lucky!”

“Well, how else would Makkachin understand me? I want him to know just how much I love him!”

Phitchit does not reply. This is because he has immediately started writing a post about how Yuuri learnt Russian so that he could speak to Makkachin “Can this boy get any cuter?! XD”. His followers eat it up and soon there is a huge discussion about Viktor’s misunderstanding taking over every social media.

Chris sends Viktor a link with a smiley face. Viktor is unresponsive for a week. And in a sulk for a month.

Yuuri’s motivation to learn Russian was Makkachin. His Russian fiancé’s DOG.

[Revised 11/16] Book Recommendations for Witches

Greetings, all. Quite some time ago, I created an annotated bibliography of some of my favorite texts on magical subjects. I was browsing it a few days ago and quickly realized, though, that it had become woefully out-of-date. There were quite a few books I’d only recently finished reading that belonged on the list! 

So, I’ve made an updated version here! Below, you can find my book recommendations, organized into loose categories. I’ve had to add a few new categories since last time, and expand several others. I do plan on doing long-form book reviews on some of these titles, and if there’s a particular one listed that you’d like to see a long review for, please let me know and I’ll work on that.

I hope you find something on here that suits your fancy! Happy reading!

For Absolute Beginners

Encyclopedia of Witchcraft, by Judika Illes. Even better than the Weiser Field Guide to Witches - this book is huge and chock-full of information. It’ll explain in easy-to-understand language how the concept has developed throughout time, why witches do what they do, and different types of witches.

The Weiser Field Guide to Witches, by Judika Illes. This gives an excellent look at the historical lore concerning witches, from the perspective of a witch herself. It’s kind of tongue-in-cheek, but it does have some information that won’t be found elsewhere.

The Modern Guide to Witchcraft, by Skye Alexander. Great book for those who’re really absolute beginners and are wondering what witchcraft is all about. Skye takes a very postmodern, utilitarian, and unfailingly honest approach, and it’s geared towards those of almost any belief system.

Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard, by Oberon Zell-Ravenheart. Attractively packaged and readible for almost all ages, this is a great (mostly) non-denominational look at the foundations of magical practice. It’s extremely detailed. Some of it only applies to Zell’s own tradition, but it’s quite useful, anyways.

Basic Techniques

Protection and Reversal Magick, by Jason Miller. This gets a little woo-woo at times, but he gives good advice on how to avoid serious problems that can come up as you begin to practice. Take with a grain of salt, though - some of this has the potential to make you feel paranoid.

City Magick, by Christopher Penczak. If you’re at all interested in tech witchery, or just want to practice magick within an urban setting, do check this out. It is by far the best look at the subject I’ve seen, and his discussion of urban tutelary spirits is worth the price alone.

Power Spellcraft for Life, by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. Nicely done, quite secular book providing basic beginner information regarding writing original spells and workings. It does fall prey to the trap of just listing correspondences with little information at times, but also contains a great deal of detail about ritual timing, raising power, and other topics essential for the beginner.

Sorcerer’s Secrets, by Jason Miller. This is a decent volume that describes a lot of techniques you don’t usually see in books, such as gesture and gaze-based magick. Be warned that Miller writes extensively about manipulative techniques, but it’s useful theory regardless of how you put it into practice.

Witch’s Bag of Tricks, by Melanie Marquis. This is not recommended for beginners, because the whole point of this book is to help existing practitioners refine and improve their already-established techniques. It’s got some novel ideas in it, and I like the author’s approach to symbolism in spellcasting.

Direct Magick (Energy Work)

The Un-Spell Book, by Mya Om. This non-denominational guide to working with magical forces is filled with useful exercises that go beyond the author’s previous work. I recommend reading this after reading Energy Essentials.

Instant Magick, by Christopher Penczak. Excellent beginner’s guide for those who don’t have access to a lot of fancy tools or prefer to work without them. This book won’t instantly teach you magick, but it will help even a seasoned practitioner find quicker, less-complicated ways of achieving results.

Energy Essentials for Witches and Spellcasters, by Mya Om. Though I balk at the use of the term “energy” to describe magical forces, this book is worth a look. It’s a bit like a workbook, with various exercises. Expect a lot of pseudoscience, though, and there are many religious references, but the techniques are solid.

Magical Writing, Words, and Symbols

Dictionary of Ancient Magic Words and Spells, by Claude Lecouteux. Mostly a historical text, this book isn’t exactly practical or terribly useful. It is, nevertheless, incredibly interesting. It’s a bit difficult to navigate, but worth a glance.

Composing Magick, by Elizabeth Barrette. A very general, but well-done, look at writing in a magical context. Some of the ritual templates are slightly specific to religious witchcraft traditions, but most information is widely applicable.

Crafting Magick with Pen and Ink, by Susan Pesnecker. Focuses both on the physical act of writing as a magical act, and the mental state associated with it. Highly recommended

The Modern Witchcraft Grimoire, by Skye Alexander. This book is for those who want to create their own grimoire. It gives fairly good advice for doing so, as well as providing hints and tricks for spellcasting and useful correspondences.

General Concepts

Planetary Magick, by Melita Denning and Osborne Phillips. If you want to work with the planets at all, particularly in a highly ritualized context, I recommend this book. It’s large, comprehensive and gives a good foundation beyond what you find in general astrology books.

Practical Planetary Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Shorter than I would have liked, but a useful reference to have on your shelf, with excellent tables and appendices in the back. The meditations are also quite useful.

Practical Elemental Magick, by Sorita d’Este and David Rankine. Should be read alongside the other book by this pair. Comprehensive guide to working with the elements in a ritualized fashion. Not as accessible to newbies as Lipp’s book, but good for seasoned practitioners.

The Way of Four, by Deborah Lipp. Though mostly geared towards Wiccans, I found this author’s in-depth treatment of the four elements highly fascinating. I will note that it’s probably best to get the print version of this book, as it contains exercises and quizzes.

Ingredients and Correspondences

The Herbal Alchemist’s Handbook, by Karen Harrison. I cannot praise this book enough for its concise and well-formulated approach to astrology, herbs, and magick as a whole.

The Weiser Concise Guide to Herbal Magick, by Judith Hawkins-Tillirson. This is excellent for anyone who’s interested in any kind of magick. Yes, the focus is generally herbs, but there’s a lot to be learned here about Kabbalah and other correspondence systems, as well.

Mixing Essential Oils for Magic, by Sandra Kynes. Fills a very difficult gap in published knowledge regarding the use of essential oils by discussing, in great detail, how scents interact with each other and how to create a formula that’s not only palatable, but evocative.

Dunwich’s Guide to Gemstone Sorcery, by Gerina Dunwich. Given the New Age fascination with all things shiny, it was quite a chore to sort through the myriad crystal books to find something with good information. While far from perfect and not exactly devoid of fluff, this book does give a level of detail about the lore surrounding gemstones not seen in many other texts.

Real Alchemy, by Robert Allen Bartlett. Excellent book, lots of history and detail. There’s a strong focus on tradition within the text, yet the author is quite accommodating of his audience and describes alternate methods that work better in a modern context.

Spagyrics, by Manfred M. Junius. With a highly-developed academic tone and attention to detail, this book is a meaty look at traditional alchemy. I recommend this more for intermediate practitioners due to the sheer density of information.

Spellbooks

The Goodly Spellbook, by Dixie Deerman and Steve Rasmussen. The title sounds horribly fluffy, but this is a hidden gem. It explains obscure concepts like alternative alphabets and potential uses of musical notes, as well as plant lore and other bits and pieces. Definitely worth checking out. It’s way more than just “a book of spells.”

Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells, by Judika Illes. The title sounds trite to some, but it delivers. This book has spells from almost every culture and spiritual philosophy, as well as a very detailed formulary. I read it when I’m bored sometimes, too, just because I always learn some tidbit from it.

Book of Spells, by Nicola Pulford. In most editions, this book is absolutely gorgeous and describes spellcasting traditions from a variety of perspectives and traditions. Recommended for those who already understand the basics, as this book jumps straight into spellcasting and gives only a small amount of information about how things work.

Ceremonial Magick

Modern Magick, by Donald Michael Kraig. I received this as a gift several years ago. It is essentially a workbook meant to be completed slowly, step by step, and while the format will not appeal to everyone, it’s a good easy-to-read introduction to ceremonial magick.

Familiar Spirits, by Donald Tyson. Though geared towards ceremonialists, any practitioner can likely learn a thing or two from Tyson’s interesting stroll through the whys and wherefores of spirit work and thoughtform creation. This is by far the best book I’ve seen on the topic of familiar spirits.

Secrets of High Magick, by Francis Melville. The most recent edition of this (the one I own) is lavishly-illustrated and full of rudimentary, yet useful information. He stresses the basics of ceremonial practice, and his writing style is very accessible. Highly recommended for absolute beginners.

My Life With The Spirits, by Lon Milo DuQuette. This is a memoir of a ceremonial magician, but it gives a good look at the magickal mindset in a highly developed form from someone who’s experienced quite a lot. I have major issues with DuQuette’s approach to Qabalah, but his memoirs are worth a read.

Chaos Magick

Liber Null and Psychonaut, by Peter Carroll. Classic book of chaos magick. I consider it required reading for almost anyone interested in the occult. Even if you have no love for chaos magick, do give it a read, just to understand how influential Carroll is, and why.

Hands-On Chaos Magic, by Andrieh Vitimus. Knowing some of the people involved in the creation of this book, I’m a bit biased towards it. That said, even if I didn’t know them, I would still recommend it. It’s especially interesting to read alongside Liber Null and Psychonautin order to see how the chaos “current” has developed over the years.

Pop Culture Magic 2.0 by Taylor Ellwood. There aren’t a lot of books on using pop culture symbolism in magick, but this one is nearly perfect. The author writes in a highly erudite, literate fashion, while still being accessible to newbies. Many useful resources cited, as well, so prepare to branch off a bit while reading it.

History-Related

Triumph of the Moon, by Ronald Hutton. An inside no-holds-barred look at the history of Wicca and Modern paganism. Highly recommended. This is sort of the book that fluffbunnies don’t want you to read.

Book of Lies: The Disinformation Guide to Magick and the Occult, by Richard Metzger. Lots of facts and history of magick in the context of Postmodernity. This is different from the Crowley text of the same name, which I wouldn’t recommend unless you want to focus on his tradition.

The Place of Enchantment, by Alex Owen. This is a purely historical text that documents the occult revival within the context of Modernity. I remember it being very good, but please realize I haven’t really picked it up much since graduating, and it might just have served my mindset at the time.

oh also honestly fuck everyone complaining about NTs using stim toys

look right, as a cripple, I’m telling you this is a good thing. Half my accessibility gear is marketed to lazy able folk, and that makes it accessible and affordable for me. disabled folks just tend to not have the numbers and money necessary for companies to make shit for them alone very often.

For the first time in my entire fucking life, today I walked into a toy shop and saw a HUGE variety of stim toys, quality, affordable stim toys of all kinds, right there, in person, that I could buy there and then, without being judged or harassed for doing so. I just??? don’t understand how you can see this shit and think it’s bad. I fucking cried seeing that, I was in awe, fuckin mouth hanging open. finally a fucking necessary thing in my life is being seen as acceptable, im not some fucking freak for it any more, i can have nice fucking things to stim with and it’s ok.

honestly idk why I even compared it to my other accommodations cus they aren’t accepted nearly as much as stim toys are tbh. We’ve got it fucking good with this, stop complaining about the NTs using the stim toys and maybe have a fucking moan about the people causing problems yeah?

Imagine with me for a moment.

Imagine a teacher telling you there’s a big exam. They don’t tell you what day it’s on, what time it happens or what chapter in the textbook it will cover. Oh, and it’s your entire grade. You’re under immense pressure to get all A’s and this one class will ruin you if you score lower than an A.

Imagine feeling your stomach knot up because you don’t know how long you have to study, you don’t know what to study and the textbook is like 500 pages long.

Imagine crying every night as you try to power through all this information, but it’s impossible to retain it because there’s so much that you forget as much as you absorb.

Imagine crying when you wake up every morning afraid you missed the exam because nobody can tell you what time it is.

Imagine being stressed to the point of shaking and chewing your fingernails off whenever you go to class because today could be exam day and you’re nowhere near ready.

Imagine it finally being exam day. You were finally able to find out what time it is last night. You got an email at 2am saying the exam is at 7. 

Imagine being unable to sleep because you’re afraid you won’t get to class in time. 

Imagine going to school feeling exhausted and plopping into your seat in class. The exam starts…and it’s from a new edition of the textbook that everybody except you got, so all your cramming and preparation for the exam was for nothing. 

Imagine you bomb the test even though you gave it your best. But you are so angry that you weren’t allowed to adequately prepare for reasons that are entirely not your fault, but the failure is still on YOU. You walk out of the classroom crying in rage, kick every locker you see and go home to bury yourself under pillows for the rest of the day.

Imagine feeling like the only loser who failed that “really simple” exam and being reminded of it every time people talk about school.

That is what it feels like to be autistic and have my routine constantly shuffled around, have plans changed on me last minute and not getting enough info to prepare for something because the people who informed me of the change won’t give me any more details. All of a sudden I’m in the middle of huge sensory unknowns that I can’t prepare for, so the likelihood of having a very public meltdown may be extremely high.

Can you understand the utter frustration and helpless feeling? Do you understand how scary that is?

Be kind to the autistic people in your life. Don’t shuffle routines without warning. Don’t change plans at the last second without seeing if they’re okay with that or not. Try to be as informative as possible when mentioning something that’s coming up. Even if it’s something like “June 10th at 10:30am, dress for hot weather and expect it to be loud” is a lot more helpful than “it’s June 10th.”

Don’t get frustrated with an autistic person if they repeatedly ask you about something that’s coming up. It could mean they’re worried about it, are afraid you’ll forget about it or are hoping you have more than vague information to give them. 

Please, even if it’s the thirtieth time in an hour, try to answer nicely. Reassure them about their concerns if possible, let them know that you haven’t forgotten about it(or thank them for reminding you if you did) and give them information as it becomes available, or tell them that you’re working on finding out. 

Knowing that you’ll make sure it works out, that you remembered and that you are trying to find out about missing info can ease some worry. But make sure you actually DO look into it and pass along relevant info as soon as you know it. You’ll save the autistic person and yourself a lot of stress.

This whole scenario applies to autistic people who can talk and don’t need a lot of daily help as well as the nonverbal autistic people who need lots of daily help and can’t make their communications understood.

Actually, this goes especially for caregivers of nonverbal autistic people who need lots of daily help and can’t make their communications understood– it’s so easy to drag them through your day and forget that they have wants and needs too. 

If a major part of their routine is something like walking in circles around the living room while watching Star Trek reruns before dinner, tell them about it instead of dragging them out the door at a time they’re expecting to stim by walking and enjoying their favorite show.

Because what you’re doing is the equivalent of telling somebody you’re going to a silent mime show and then taking them to a noisy construction site instead. Their brain is prepared for a quiet experience, so their mentall walls aren’t up. What do you think is gonna happen?

Love Unintentional (Part 2)

Word Count: 2842

A/M: So this is Part Two of my story *Love Unintentional (Part 1). The first one went extremely well and I’m so happy for it, thank you! :) There will be more parts to this story, look for them the next coming fridays! I hope you like it! Tell me if you do! Xx

*Other Parts: Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6


The driver pulled up to the curb on your side as a red carpet welcomed you to the premiere. Suddenly you felt butterflies in your stomach as you looked out the window to the crowd of people, fans and cameras. With the thoughts of your boyfriend and relationship in peril still in your mind, you began to feel sick. 

 

“Hey.” You heard Harry call your attention, “It’ll be okay. You’ll do fine." 

"But what if they ask a question that I don’t know how to answer? What if something slips and this huge lie is out there? If that happens we’re both screwed.” You frowned now feeling more anxious than ever.

He just simply smiled, “Just stay with me when doing interviews. I’ll handle it." 

"What are you going to say then?" 

"We’ll tell them the truth." You raised an eyebrow not understanding what the hell he meant by that. But he just shrugged it off, "If you’re ever feeing anxious or nervous, just come over to me. I’ve got you.” He assured which made you feel a lot better. 

He smiled, “Now stay right here. I’ll get the door for you.” It was then that you realized that he had held your hand the whole drive as he finally let it go. 

You felt yourself blush, until he finally showed up as he opened the door to your side and smiled, “It’s now or never love.” He said as he reached his hand out to you. 

You smiled and took it as you stepped out of the car with him arm in arm. 

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anonymous asked:

How have you forgiven Robert so quickly?

don’t get me wrong anon, when the scenes aired i wanted to do a chas and smack the life out of him. 

I love this fandom, i really do, but i think a lot of people had one foot out the door when it came to robert, waiting for him to mess up enough that they have an excuse to hate him. and i understand it, i really do, but thats not me. 

I love robert, he’s been my favourite character for so long and that isn’t changing soon. He made a huge mistake, one that, whilst it took some nudging, he confessed to chas.

aaron hurt him, he said the one thing that robert dreaded to hear, that he was no use to him. i’m not trying to justify him cheating, it was a shit thing to do, but like he said to rebecca, he wanted to get back at him for it, and rebecca was the easiest way to do it.  

i saw an ask answered by @sapphicsugden and also one by @victoriasugden that i think sums up a lot. when was the last time you saw robert ‘thirty quid shower gel’ sugden look as rough as he did as last night? the last time he didn’t change out his clothes from the day before? because i think the only time i’ve ever seen it was ssw, when he was terrified he’d lost aaron, do you see a correlation there?

he regrets it, he hates himself for it and is disgusted with himself for what he did, he’s lost chas’ trust and now he feels like he has no home and is seconds away from losing his family for good.

that’s why i’ve forgiven him, because robert is in pain, and as awful as what he did is, he deserves a second chance for this. 

Who You Are

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Word Count: 1.2K

Warning(s): swearing

Summary: You are on a mission of your own when you get caught by a certain superhero.

You take in a deep breath before taking a step out of the bright yellow taxi and shutting the door. You look straight up, scanning the wide, glass covered, thirty-floor building looking for anything out of the ordinary. You then nervously fix your blouse and straighten out your skirt before heading towards the main doors of the building. You understood why they picked you for this mission, but you were just the healer. You didn’t put your life at risk like this. Like the others….

“Y/N once you get through the doors there will be a security checkpoint. You are going to need to use the I.D. badge that I gave you and swipe it at the scanner. It should hopefully work and get you in,” says one of your teammates, Ida, through the intercom placed in your ear.

“Hopefully?” you hiss quietly, “You mean to tell me this might not work?”

“I am 99% sure that this will work. I mean, come on. It’s me we are talking about,” she replies rather smug.

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“How does your cat keep finding me? It’s such a huge town.”

“I can’t have people knowing I can raise the dead.”

“You’re not someone I can risk losing.”

“Try to understand that everything I’ve done up until now was done with you in mind.”

“You’ve got to be mistaking me for someone else.”

“Honestly, does that even sound like something I’m capable of doing?”

Hey babes! Sooo I reached 400 followers yesterday! Thank you so incredibly much! I don’t even understand how it happened so fast but I’m grateful for anyone who comes to my blog to cheer them up or make them smile. :) I care about you guys a whole lot, and even though I said I wasn’t going to do another ff, I caved and made another bc I’m too lazy to do blog rates xD 

Also, huge thanks to you babes for liking my fics, moodboard, and my music I post on here as well as sending in lovely asks <3 Literally your support and love keeps me going and makes my days brighter, and ilysm!! 💕💕

So, for this one (because the other one was a fail) I’m not going alphabetical, and I’m gonna make sure you’re all tagged this time! (big shout out to @placebophan for helping me with that! ;)) Just tagging my mutuals I see a lot as well as interact with! My besties are bolded, and my pals are italicized 🌸

edit: I’m gonna be replying to some reblogs, so blacklist ashleysfollowforever if you don’t want this on your dash! :) 

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