Do you realise that when you give a schilling to a beggar you are giving it to yourself? Do you realise that, when you help a dog over a stile, you yourself are being helped? Do you realise that, when you kick a man when he is down, you are kicking yourself? Give him another kick, you deserve it!
you know when you’re in a small crowded room where the air is all tight and warm but at the time you’re breathing fine (the air seems normal) and then you step out of the room only to realise the entire time you were being deprived of fresh air.
people are alot like that. when you spend lengthy periods of time with certain individuals you become oblivious to the influence they’re having on you because thats all you’ve ever known (similar to the room). you don’t realise how toxic they are and only after you’ve stepped away and spent time with others do you realise how much negativity you were surrounding yourself with.
we all need to learn that its okay to step away from these toxic people and it doesn’t make you a bad person for thinking about your own betterment
Watching the ‘no man’s land’ in wonder woman I realised that even though it might not be every woman’s story, it surely was mine.
She climbs up, deflects one bullet with her arm. Looks at it and realises her power - what she can do. She is not surprised, its just an affirmation of the capabilties she always thought she had. As she steps forward there are more bullets, more challenges and she starts gaining confidence as she starts running towards danger.
Metaphorically thats how patriarchy in Pakistan works. You start small, you deflet one challenge, realise you do more and then go on from baby steps to full blown running and then a point comes where you stop and hide behind your shield, screaming knowing you have reached your limit. You can’t make it alone.
That’s where your friends come in and help you, people who inspired by you believe in the same cause. They come and help you cross that final mile. That scene spoke to me on so many levels because that is EXACTLY scene by scene my life story of how I became a courageous young woman from a meek little mouse.
ARGHHHHH THEY SAID I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU UGH MY BABIES SO BEAUTIFUL AND CUTE AND REACHING THIS MILESTONE IS IDK I THOUGHT IT MIGHT TAKE A WHILE SINCE I THOUGHT THEY MIGHT HAVE THEM FOCUS ON THEIR CAREERS FIRST OR SOMETHING BUT NO FIGURING OUT WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO DO AND REALISING YOU LOVE SOMEONE BECAUSE OF IT OR NOT WANTING TO WAIT ANOTHER SECOND TO DECLARE WHAT YOU’VE BEEN WANTING TO SAY FOR SO LONG I LOVE IT I LOVE THEM THIS IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When your soulmate is eating something you can taste it on your lips, just slightly. And maybe feel it on your lips too, like the powder of a cinnamon donut, except you can’t lick it away, so you’re just stuck with it like ‘damn you asshole, lick your goddamn lips! This is annoying!’
If they’re having cravings you do too. Sometimes you’ll get cravings for what you’ve just eaten.
If you taste something like strawberry lip gloss you know their either getting ready for a night out or kissing someone. Or maybe they just like the taste.
You constantly lick your lips when they’re eating something you like because 'oh gods this taste so good, what is it?’ or 'I haven’t had that in ages!’
You get jealous of the fact that they have such nice food ALL THE DAMN TIME.
When they’re eating something you don’t like you try to not lick your lips for so long. It gets annoying and is hard to do for a while so you just put on lip gloss. Then you think 'awe, man. What if they don’t like… And that’s why they put on lip gloss the other week?’
One day you try to send them a recipe. So you just, like, munch on a piece of toast, then lick some honey, then eat some banana so they’ll try your favourite meal and you’ll have that taste on your lips without actually eating it.
One day you think 'what kind of idiot eats peanut butter with jam - holy shit it’s an American! Or someone in America… Maybe they just like it? Oh god will I have to take 20-something hour flight to find them? Uuuhhhggghhh!’
You’re in the middle of a test but just can’t stop licking your lips because 'oh god glazed donuts…’
You can’t place a taste but you know you’ve tasted it before.
After going to Harry Potter world you realise 'it’s butterbeer!’ and then you try a butterbeer cappuccino or whatever and are just - 'goddamn it you jerk you ruined all my experiences!’
You start craving a signature dish from your town that is only served there. You go to the restaurant and see three people eating the meal, so you just walk up to the counter, order something that is nothing like the dish or something that you know that person hates because every time after you eat it you taste mouthwash.
You calmly sit down and just watch the people as you eat your meal. The person you least expected it to be - oh god it can’t be - looks up and is just like 'fuck’ and has that expression on their face.
They look around and see you. Their eyes widen at what you’re eating. You’re the only one eating it. You smirk and wave at them because 'haha sucker you laughed when I was teased about my soulmate and it’s you!’
Or one day you turn to your best friend like 'hey, can you see if anyone is eating -’ your eyes widened as you see they’re eating the EXACT MEAL you can taste.
Or a different ending where you follow a celebrity on Instagram and just see a picture of a steak with the caption being 'why the hell do I taste banana and honey… I’m eating a steak!’
And you just drop your toast. Your family stares at you as you squeal. Then you realise 'shit. That could be anyone.’ But you do taste steak… 'But anyone can be eating steak!’ You rush to the kitchen and pull out dark chocolate and go to the bathroom and start brushing your teeth.
Soon you see another picture of a steak and a caption of 'okay, now I’m tasting ANOTHER thing that clashes with my meal. Soulmate, please let me eat in peace… AND WHO HAS DARK CHOCOLATE AND TOOTHPASTE?!?! Will my future babies eat like this too? God save me…’
She doesn’t like to be called babe because it’s sort of a lazy way of saying baby, she loved it when I called her by nicknames, babygirl, princess, tiger (because she wants to reincarnate into a tiger if she one day dies) beautiful, etc, she doesn’t like when others call her by her name, because she prefers “soph” but she loved it when I called her by her name and she sat there smiling at me for ages. Her favourite drinks are iced coffee, those frappe things from McDonald’s and rubicon (the mango one though) she loved coffee and I’ll never understand why. Shes insecure of her face and when You look at her too long she’ll cover it, she’s insecure of her body, though it’s perfect just the way it is to me, she’s insecure of her smile but I find it beautiful. No matter how many times I called her beautiful she didn’t once believe it because she believes she isn’t. No matter how many times I tried to prove to her she was beautiful she didn’t believe it. She’s insecure, she’s scared of being hurt, she’s scared of wasting time, she’s scared of putting her all into somebody to be left alone, her guard was up, even after I showed her the craziest amounts of love, because she’s afraid of letting people in and it’ll take her ages for her to be able to trust you and open up, the way she is stubborn drives me crazy because I want her to tell me what’s wrong but she won’t. She’s spend all night crying over me but has been happy for me the next day because whose wants to see a smile on my face, she will be emotional, she’ll cry, she’ll cry and lot, she won’t tell me she’s crying though because she’s scared to bring attention to herself. She gets jealous but only because she doesn’t want to see me with anybody else. She has days where all she wants to do is be alone and cry, there’s days she’ll have no motivation but all you need to do is try to be there for her regardless of how much she acts as though she doesn’t care because deep down she does and her pain is too much to explain so she’ll keep it in rather than tell me what’s wrong. She thinks she’s stupid and not intelligent (which I think and believe she is) and regardless of what i tell her she will never believe it, she always believes she isn’t enough but she is more than enough, I look at her and see my future, I look at her and it will physically hurts me because i know that she is worth much more yet she sticks around just for me, I think back to all the times I’ve hurt her and made her cry because of stupid arguments, I’ll look at her and my eyes will light up from the way her smile forms and the way her pupils dilate, the way she turns her head to the side so I won’t see her smiling or laughing. she never wants to see me upset, she may never say much but she knows, she wants to say things but her shyness takes over, she wants to be here for me but she will have no idea what to say, she will try her damn right hardest to be there for me and even though i don’t realise how much effort she puts in she will still carry on doing so. Even though I don’t thank her enough for making you happy she will still carry on doing so because she wants me to be happy. She never really speaks about what’s on her mind until i physically beg her to, she hates to talk of her past and her future and if I’m lucky she’ll tell me a story or two about her past, I need to pay attention because she hates to repeat herself, i need to reply to her like I’m interested or she’ll think i don’t care. She hates to talk of her future because it’s “depressing” because she doesn’t believe in herself but now is the part where i should interfere and motivate her to believe that everything she wants will be hers as long as she tries. She hates it when i give her “positivity rants” on the phone because it makes her overthink. She hates feeling like I’m not paying attention to her. She hates when I don’t realise everything you do for her. She hates feeling depressed and alone so i much bring as much happiness to her as possible, she hates knowing that I’m not okay. she loves sci-fi movies and that’s another thing I’ll never understand why she loves but when we’re married I’ll sit with her through 3 hour sci-fi movies because it’ll put a smile on her face and I’d do anything for that, She loves to mess and play with her hair, she is so downright passionate about photography and she loves relating to somebody, she loves when I know things about her, she loves having deep meaningful conversations, she sometimes stays up until stupid o clock to check up on me and to see if I’m okay or just to speak to me because she craves me and the feelings I give her. She stays up some nights doing things for me which I would never expect and some nights she will cry herself to sleep because I upset her or because im not okay. She loves to play fight and she loves it when I look into her eyes and she loves it when I lay in bed with her and just talk absolute shit. She loves long walks and pleasing sights, she loves going to pretty places, she loves the nights and one day she would love to travel the world with the love of her life, even though she’s never been an an airplane before but it’s fine because neither have I. she would love a long car journey to wherever as long as it’s with somebody she loves, she loves old music and she loves to make you happy. She loves wearing casual clothes and rarely ever wants to look “feminine” but I love it because its her character and who she is and she will never change that. She will make me happy even if I’m not making her happy because she loves me and will do anything to see a smile on my face. She doesn’t like going to busy places like concerts or crowds etc, she loves dogs and practically develops bonds with them, she dislikes her dog because she’s ‘boring’ but she still loves her and sees her as a sister, because she’s grown up with her. She is sometimes so full of life and so happy that its literally contagious, her smile makes me smile and her laugh is honestly the best sound ever, I see my future every time I look deeply into her eyes and i realise that she is worth so much more than me yet she sticks around, once she loved me she has not once stopped, ever since that day 3 years ago. Sometimes she will act heartless but only because she wants me to show her that I care, sometimes she’ll cry and not tell me because she wants me to figure it out. She doesn’t like to be around many people, she doesn’t want to go to college because she hates the whole school vibe but I respect her for that because going straight for a apprenticeship takes guts, she doesn’t have many friends and although people think they know her, I can assure you they don’t, she will make you feel as though you know her but you really don’t, even I don’t know/understand her to the full extent, because she doesn’t really let anybody in unless she really wants to tell them something, she doesn’t really open up to anybody, she may talk a lot on the phone sometimes but in real life it is the complete opposite because she will become shy. She loves her dads car because of it’s blacked out windows so people can’t see her. I’d describe her as mysterious and as every single day which goes on I carry on learning more about her. She is the book I’ve opened and I will carry on reading her till I am finished reading her which will be never because she is an endless story. She loves it when I hype her up when she looks beautiful when I replay, screenshot and reply with endless emojis because her beauty takes away my breath. Sometimes she’ll have an attitude because she’s upset about something and she wants me to figure it out. But her attitude is nothing to fuck with at all because she can talkkkkk I assure you, she will fight her opinion onto you and she will make her point, but she won’t say a word in person, regardless of the arguments and regardless of the heartlessness she will love me entirely and will carry on doing so and I will never question that. Her heart is made of gold and she will always want what is best for me. I’d keep on going because this isn’t everything about her, if I could, but quite honestly I’d be going on for hours, I could never lie, me and her have made the most happiest and craziest memories together, and I could never doubt that. If forever does not last for me and her and you’re the next person who falls in love with her, take this all in and realise what you’re getting yourself into. Treat her well because she is honestly a queen, you’ll learn to love her, but let me assure you something, you will never love her half as much as I do. But for now and hopefully till forever, she is mine and I will carry on loving her till the day I die.