Hey sorry to be that guy but like I really want to understand this because I don't think I have a good enough frame of reference. It seems to me like he's said that he didn't intend to write Reyna as anything but straight, but if you're a lesbian and you identify with her you're free to imagine her as a lesbian, but that he wouldn't write her falling in love with a woman because to him it would feel like her sexuality was a consolation prize. Could you help me understand what's wrong with that?
he’s ignoring lesbians and bi girls who are actually telling him that this is wrong. when challenged on it, he then went on to condescendingly say that he has talked with lesbians and bi women about this. i’m mad for a number of reasons, but the most hurtful one is how he acts like he has authority to speak on the issue when he so obviously doesn’t know what he is talking about.
lesbians do fail at heterosexual relationships, all the time. it is why we’re lesbians! we can’t do hetero, it never works out. the trope that we really need to be wary of isn’t that lesbians are lesbians because they fail at heterosexual relationships (which is literally true like you literally cannot be a lesbian if you do not fail at heterosexual relationships), it’s that “lesbians don’t need to have their sexuality respected bc they’re really just straight girls who’ve been hurt by guys, and if you hit on them in the right way they’ll eventually change their mind and have sex with you.”
like, this is what was, at first, frustrating to me—that he would try and attempt to invoke something that is much larger and more complicated than he understands, obviously, while literally speaking to someone who was almost certainly a lesbian or a bi girl. what makes it worse is that when called in this behavior, instead of just saying “whoops sorry i’ll do better” he said “sorry you got your feelings hurt, but i wrote emmie and jo based on personal experience and reyna is supposed to be straight.” which is just…cheap as fuck. it’s irrelevant. what does emmie and jo have to do with reyna being straight?
so instead it just comes across as “oh my god i already included a lesbian couple, what more do you want????” which…well, yeah, he can fuck right off with that attitude, mr stonewall award “i promise i won’t stop listening.”
sounds like he stopped listening! couldn’t even take like, twelve hours of criticism, instead he’s literally blocking people.
here, i can give what rick should have said, that would have still ultimately made me annoyed, but not nearly as absolutely livid and disgusted and…frankly, hurt, as i am right now: “i never planned on giving reyna a love interest, but as always, you guys are more than welcome to your interpretations and ships!”
he didn’t have to write a bunch of boiling hot nonsense about stereotypes (of which his writing is CHOCKED FULL off) and being your own better half and how reyna is supposed to be straight. he didn’t have to write a pathetic disclaimer about how he knew he was running the risk of having things “thrown” at him.
that’s why i’m really mad. he knew it would be controversial, and he didn’t care. he knew it hurt people, and he made no attempt to understand why we were hurt. he didn’t even consider that these “harmful lesbian stereotypes” literally are fabricated on the idea that bisexuality doesn’t even exist. i mean, really. i can debunk this oh so terrible stereotype in one sentence: “i didn’t turn lesbian, i’ve been bi the whole time!” -reyna. an alternative sentence: “i didn’t turn lesbian, i just never realized it before.” -reyna
see how easy?
calling a lesbian’s identity or life partner a consolation prize if they’ve been with men, before? yeah i know what people will say lmao “he didn’t say that he said he was trying to avoid that stereotype”….to which i say, right, how? how was he trying to avoid that stereotype? by not giving her a girlfriend. and so what, then, would be the logical conclusion? that this stereotype is true, and by giving a character a girlfriend, you’re invoking it. what does that mean for lesbians who have actually been with men? what does that mean for bi girls who have been with men? what kind of a fucking monstrosity of an answer is that?
more importantly: AS IF NONE OF THE LOVE INTERESTS IN HIS STORIES ARE ACTUAL CONSOLATION PRIZES? as if calypso wasn’t brought back for the sole purpose of giving leo a woman as a prize?
no, nope, the only way this awful stereotype could possibly show up is if you give a lesbian a girlfriend. but i show absolutely no self awareness of the awful tropes i’ve already enacted in my books.
and, as shell pointed out, and i echoed….the very fact that he knows giving reyna a girlfriend would invoke lesbian stereotypes is living proof of the fact that he knows reyna’s experiences and life story are consistent with that of many lesbians.
but he doesn’t care. because he’s lazy, and it takes too much effort, and at the end of the day he’s not listening to us at all, he’s just trying to make us shut up.