In Your Head - Pt 3
Jughead Jones x Reader
Word Count: 3,522
Summary: You are almost 3 months into a relationship with Jughead Jones. You are going through a tough time being too much in your head as the anniversary of “that night” comes closer. Jughead can sense something is wrong.
Warnings: Features sexual content, as well as a rape flashback and parental abuse. Please don’t read if easily triggered.
By the time lunch hit, you were relieved to be half way through school. You actually liked class unlike most people there, but your head just kept replaying the previous nights nightmares. Memories really.
“Hey Sweetheart. You okay? You were quieter than usual this morning.” Jughead gave a reassuring smile that was laced with concern. You had gotten to the lunch table before everyone else, barely picking at your food.
“Yeah I’m fine, just stayed up later than I noticed”. Part of that was true. You hadn’t really been looking forward to sleep lately.
“You still going tonight?”, Veronica had chimed in and slid in next to you.
“Yeah I guess, I think I’ve been cooped up to much in my house…”
“Yeah you went home pretty early last night…” Betty didn’t really finish her sentence while sitting down across the table.
“I just needed to finish some homework and then got through a good chunk of my novel…“
“So what’s the plan ladies?”, Kevin somehow managed to eye all 3 of you wanting to know when to come over to Veronica’s.
“Let’s say 6ish at Betty’s place and we’ll go to my place from there ”, Veronica answered making sure the 3 of you nodded.
“I’ll be with Archie and helping set up for Val with him”, Jughead looked to you rubbing your hand.
“Alright, we’ll see you there”. You gave a reassuring look to Betty making sure it was still okay to meet in her house.
Archie had sat down beginning to talk about and reiterate what Val had told him of their set for the night. He seemed rather excited for her even though the Pussycat’s had easily played bigger gigs.
The bell chimed and you flinched a little out of nowhere. Your body had jumped enough for both Jughead and Betty to notice and without you knowing, they gave a look to each other. “See you after school”? He gave you a kiss on your neck while squeezing your thigh before he got up with his tray.
“Of course, I don’t have to get Y/B/N today. He’s got his bike. So I have a little bit before I head over to Betty’s”.
“Okay, see you then”, he leaned in for a kiss on your lips before giving a slow sprint behind Betty to meet up with.
POV of Jughead
You tugged on Betty’s sleeve really quick, “Hey, can you do something for me”?
“Of course Juggs, what”? Betty gave her classic smile of friendship that was filled with sincerity.
“Can you talk to Y/N for me? I know the rumors of last year but she seems a little on edge, more than normal anyway. I just don’t want to pry and think a “fellow woman” might be more of the answer.
“Yeah I can, I wanted to ask her something as well…” Betty seemed to not be giving complete answers that day.
“Thanks Betts”, you smiled before heading back to go your locker.
POV of Y/N “Hey, my house at 5 instead, V changed her mind”.
“K”, you answered in reply to Betty before putting your phone away and before the bell rang again.
* * * * * * * * *
Now having less time, instead of going to Pop’s, Jughead had walked you home. Hand in hand and all the while taking brief moments to pause and kiss you. Once in the middle of the sidewalk, another against a tree and so on. At the next pause, he kissed your neck, which made you blush, while you reached for the side of his cheek bringing his lips to yours. You used your lips to grasp his bottom one and with a breath he moved his lips to do the same to yours. You opened your jaw wider letting a little bit of your tongue sneak through. You could feel him smiling while kissing you back. After a few moments, you released him. Opening your eyes you saw a blushed and gleeful look upon Jughead.
You had made it to your block. About 4 past Archies place that Jughead had been at for more than a month. Still holding your hand, he glanced over giving a look of concern, similar to the one he had earlier in the day.
“You sure your okay? You jumped earlier…”
You cut him off with what felt like a fake smile. “Yeah, just got startled was all. So…I’ll see you there tonight Heathcliff”?
“Heathcliff?” He gave a heavy smirk before rolling his eyes, “oh God you started reading Wuthering Heights…”
You giggled, “don’t worry, I’m not romantcizing that one. I know the ending is like Romeo and Juliet on crack”.
He gave a big laugh, “Well goodnight for now then Juliet”. He gave a kiss to your hand before pretending to bow.
You smiled walking away keeping your eyes on Jughead before he turned back around. He had only been to your place once, and knew that there was some tension in that house even if you hadn’t explained why.
* * * * * * * * *
The clock turned 4:30. By this time you had done some of your brothers laundry for him, made sure he had something to eat and even managed to play some ps4 before getting back to your room.
You put some lip balm on, a different shirt with a black cardigan while grabbing a bag of your pjs, a book, your pill bottle and clothes for the next day. You nodded to your brother by the living room before heading out the 4 blocks down to Betty’s.
You glanced outside and already saw that the truck Archie surely took with Jughead was gone.
You rang the door bell. Betty answered rather quickly with a “hey”.
You waved to her mother before heading up to her room with her. She closed the door while saying “V said she would be a little bit so we can just stay up here till then”. While you found Betty’s demure odd, you did know Veronica had a habit of being late to everything.
You looked around the rather large pink room, noticing the amount of flowers on the walls. “So, I don’t want to be abrupt but can I ask you something?”. You assumed it either had to do with Jughead or someone else in the group so you nodded.
“A few months back, when V and I found that book with Ethel….” as she spoke these words you started to clam up. You weren’t sure you were in there before she finished her sentence. “Your name was in there, Y/N. Next to Chuck….but you hadn’t told any of us that he had lied about it like he did Ethel and the others” you could tell she was afraid to make eye contact but she looked at you anyway, not with judgement but concern. You moved to the base of her bed looking at your feet trying not to stare back.
Your mouth went dry and you had to pause, mustering up what little courage you had to speak. “That’s because it wasn’t a lie…what did it say”? You looked back up at her while pulling your sleeves over your hands.
“The whole book, had a point system. And like Veronica, you had a “new girls” point with your name”.
She moved her body down and sat next to you, bracing your shoulder.
You took a deep breathe, “I wasn’t sure I was in there….I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to put it in…” you stopped mid sentence. You held your arms trying not to cry, and with taking a deep breathe “I wasn’t….” you paused again “I wasn’t a willing participant ”. You looked up at her, she had a tear in her eye with only concern for you.
“Does Juggie know?”, she asked already knowing the answer.
“No, we haven’t gotten that physical yet and it’s uhhh….well it’s almost been a year since. I know he knows something has been putting me on edge a bit, and I want to tell him…I just..it’s already hard for me to think about”. You felt a lump in your throat, you hadn’t really cried but you felt on the edge of it.
“Okay.” She chimed up with purpose and grabbed you up with her by grabbing your palm. She wiped away her tear. “Do you still want to go tonight”?
You thought for a second, knowing you didn’t really want to go home. “Yeah, I need a night where I don’t get in my head as much”. For the first time in two days, you finally felt like you actually wanted to go to Cheryl’s party. “I want a night out with Juggs too….you know, even if you two are off sleuthing for a bit”. You smiled trying to convince her that everything was okay.
“Alright, we got like 15 until Kev gets here and then V with her driver…” she looked towards the side of her room and back to you, “So did Jughead ever tell you the time he ruined my birthday by eating my cake before I got to blow out my candles”?!
You laughed, “No!” Yet when you thought about it, it seemed perfectly in character of the man you were growing to love.
* * * * * * * *
“So if I quote Mean Girls and say “get in bitches” will you guys still do it”? Veronica gave a smile with her driver waiting outside the driveway.
Kevin had been there for a little bit, “Only if I’m Gretchen…..”. You all gave a laugh before putting all your stuff in the trunk and got in with your friends.
* * * * * * * *
Getting ready to get out of the bathroom, you stared into the mirror. You didn’t exactly feel like yourself in Veronica’s clothes. And while you had convinced her out of putting you in a dress or a skirt, she still gave you rather tight forming clothes - complete with a crop top and skinny black pants. You had to remind yourself that this was from the girl that felt completely comfortable in a cat suit not 3 weeks ago. You picked up your black cardigan and put it back on, you weren’t entirely behind your arms showing too much. You were still hiding some things from people even if Betty had now known more about you than anyone besides your therapist.
You took a deep breath and turned the knob.
“Yeeeesssss”! Kevin gave a look up and down of approval. He was in a nice button up and what looked like really expensive jeans. “Here, let me put your hair up…” something you didn’t usually took the time to do in the morning but you welcomed the gesture nonetheless.
Veronica and Betty had finished putting makeup on each other. Veronica in a tight fitted black dress without too much embellishment beyond her necklace. Betty was also in something in Veronica’s but it was black, something unusual for Betty as you had only ever seen her in bright colors and pastels. Hers was less form fitted and flared out at the bottom.
Betty went up to you “you look great Y/N”!
“You too”. You glanced towards Betty and while a little out of place in Veronica’s clothing as well, she had a body you envied for. Sometimes you weren’t sure what Jughead saw in you when he was around these two gorgeous girls all the time.
“Come on”, she grabbed you down with Veronica to the vanity and they began to do your makeup.
You looked at the vanity below you, “….nothing too crazy right”?.
“Nah, we got you”, Veronica said reassuringly.
* * * * * * * * *
“We’re about to walk up” you texted back to Jughead who was apparently bored out of his mind with Archie and Val. You felt a little nervous as well a little silly before realizing you were in the midst of Thornhill once again.
You looked up a few minutes later greeted by Jughead who had a look of being somewhat stunned. You covered your midriff with your arms, a little uncomfortable in what you were wearing.
“Well….”? You were looking for some kind of reaction from Jughead. Veronica, Betty and Kevin gave a nod while all heading to Cheryl’s door and walking in.
“You look amazing”. He couldn’t stop staring up and down until meeting your eyes. “You always look gorgeous, but this is just different…I mean a good different”! You could tell Jughead got a little nervous himself.
You brought him in close, kissed him hard while grasping the back if his hair.
He smiled while you parted, “come on”, he said while grasping your hand. You went in, and what was from memory, you knew where you were walking too. The closer you got to the middle of the house, the louder the music got. Vibrations filled the house, which was saying something considering the enormously large vintage home.
Jughead led you to the kitchen, where the rest of the gang including Archie was. Jughead took a beer from Archie while you just stuck to a soda. You looked at the bottles, and while engrossed with the familiarity of the smell, you tried to remain with your red cup. Betty and Jughead gave eyes to each other when Betty noticed you and gave you a reassuring nod. Jughead himself saw, a little confused with your mutual look.
You tugged at his shirt, “go ahead, I know you want to go into Sherlock mode”, you whispered into his ear.
“You sure?!” He was shouting a bit while making sure you could hear him over the music. You nodded and gave a look to Veronica. Both you and Kevin followed Veronica and Archie out of the kitchen after you gave Jughead a slight kiss on the neck. At the corner of your eye you could see him smile again. While watching Betty and Jughead make their way to the stairs, you leaned back into the kitchen tossing some of the rum into your drink, then hurried back to the rest of your friends.
The music was loud, but at least good. The Pussycats were all in matching slinky outfits, something you could never have the confidence to adorn. Kevin pulled you in to dance while you took a large sip of your drink, he leaned over to smell your cup. “Ha! I knew you would partake with us”!
Both with drinks in hand you loosened up a bit dancing with Veronica and Kevin. Archie was closer to the band making sure Valerie had sight of him. By the time the song ended you finished your drink and Kevin and you went back to the kitchen for more. Veronica gave a nod of holding your spots on the dance floor. You hadn’t really scanned the house to see who was there, but it felt like the whole school was. You hadn’t even seen Cheryl which in itself was a welcomed gift.
“Come on!” Kevin gave you a shot of something and you tapped back the small glass with his. He took shots better than you it seemed, and you threw back what seemed like tequila. You once again mixed some rum with some soda and Kevin did the same before heading out. He grabbed your wrist making your way back to the dance floor with Veronica.
Your eyes drew back to the corner of the room where you saw Chuck and some of the football team talking. He seemed to pause mid sentence while glancing back at you. You drew your attention elsewhere. Moose had made his way down to the dance area with Midge while glancing at you and Kevin. You looked back at Kevin who then chimed in before you could say anything - “Don’t even get me started with that situation”. You smiled and both drank more out of your cups while bouncing to the music.
The trip to the kitchen occurred a few more times, including a instance when you filled up Veronica’s glass for her. You looked at your phone and there wasn’t a message from Jughead. You had assumed Betty and him had found something important.
The air was getting thin and while the house was quite large, the air was getting a bit hot.
“I’m going to get some air!”. Shouting yourself, you made sure Kevin heard you before you gave him a nod looking at the side porch.
“Alright! I’ll be there in a minute!” He kept dancing with Veronica.
A bit more than tipsy now, and almost tripping over Veronica’s flats that were just a slight too big for you, you made it to the porch. The cool wind felt nice, and you decided to text Jughead asking if he had found anything vital.
“Well look at you. You certainly got yourself back into your old habits….” Your spine gave a shudder as you directed your head to Chuck coming out of the doorway.
“Just leave me alone Chuck”, you had enough liquid courage in you to at least speak back to him.
You could smell his breath from there, you assumed he had been at the party longer.
“Now why would I do that when you obviously came back here for a reason”? He edged his way near you and you tried to scoot away from him on the bench. Your body began to freeze and his arm went behind your back grasping onto the porch. He put his drink down only to start trying to touch your thigh while your closed your eyes, heavily breathing while Chuck began to move his hands on you. You began to shout “leave me alone”!
You looked up while hearing someone coming to the porch.
It was Jughead. He forced Chuck’s shoulder towards him and punched him in the face. “She said to leave her alone”!
Chuck was drunk enough that his body weight went to the ground pretty hard. Jughead grabbed your hand and you followed him back to the kitchen. He grabbed your face with both hands and looked in your eyes, “are you okay”?!
“Yeah…yeah I’m alright…” you were still coming out of being frozen from the porch. Trying to take deep breathes, Jughead grabbed your hand again leading you to another room while Betty made sure no one followed the two of you. You were grateful for that.
It was quieter once Jughead closed the door to what seemed like the Thornhill library.
“Are you sure”? Jughead wasn’t shouting anymore but rather being reassuring while grasping your shoulder.
“Yeah, yeah” you took another breath “I’m okay”.
“Y/N…” He paused “you’re crying”. He looked at you in your eyes until you touched your face, not realizing that you had been.
“Yeah, no. I’m alright. Thank you.” You paused. “For that. For being there…”
Your words trailed. You knew you had to tell him but when you looked back up you already knew Betty had told him something.
“Y/N…..what happened with Chuck…and with you, last year”? He looked down at his feet not sure of his words before his eyes met yours.
“Did…did Betty tell you”? You had hoped that your friend had kept this private.
“She told me about the book. What else happened”? His concern grew while you lead him towards the grand love seat to the side of you.
“I’ve uh….I’ve been here before. Cheryl was rather nice to me last year”. You had practiced this in your head a thousand times, you knew you were going to tell him at some point and you knew then what words you wanted to say. “My second party here….I danced with Chuck. I did a lot of drinks that night. I honestly still don’t know how many. When it got late, he offered to drive me home”. You paused again because now while you were saying these words, the visuals were all coming back to you. You were looking just at the floor now. “He stopped the car at Pickens Park. I thought he liked me. I didn’t notice how drunk he was until he kissed me”.
You paused again. 1, 2, 3….4….Jughead held your hand. “He uh, pushed me back after that…locked the doors. He moved on top of me and I tried screaming. I tried kicking him, but he’s a lot bigger than me. He grabbed me, and….and I just screamed as loud as I could before he covered my mouth. He hit me to shut up a few times…”, 5…6….7…"when I finally did, is when he…” you paused again while it all coming back as a rush. You closed your eyes hard while trying to give yourself a break before opening them again. You shook your head and you left it there.
You looked up, and saw Jugheads face. You had never seen him cry before. He pulled you in and held you.
“It’s okay. I got you”. You hadn’t realized you were crying again. You held him back and close.
A few moments later, after holding you tight in the embrace, you heard Jughead under his breath “I’m going to kill him…”