Shit. The woman gripped the railings tighter, the voice cutting through the breeze and making her jump slightly. She regained her balance quickly, the cold metal feeling like it was burning her hands, she was gripping it so tightly.
She was no longer alone. That was definitely going to make this harder than it already was.
Maybe if she ignored him, he’d just get bored and go away? Or maybe if she asked him politely he’d leave? People didn’t want to involve themselves with this right? Like, who really wanted to watch a 29 year old girl plunge to their death?
Although given what she’d read on the Internet, there were a fair few sickos out there who would have.
She knew she should have gone for the pills instead. Or the razor. But that would have meant checking back into a hotel room and she’d be discovered pretty quickly. That was something she didn’t want. The river below looked fairly fast moving, and her hope was that she’d be swept away and that it would take a few days for her body to be recovered and matched up with the suitcase she was leaving behind.
She should have waited until later in the evening. It had seemed quiet, and she’d been stood here for the last two hours and he was only the second person that had come this way. The first had barely given her a glance, despite the crying. But then again, she had been on the other side of the railings at that point.
Oh why was this so hard?
“Um….. My name’s Spencer Reid. Listen…. Is there someone I can call? Someone who you need to talk to? You don’t have to do this.”
She glanced over to where the voice was coming from, seeing a tall gangly man with messy hair, a dirty brown colour. He was wrapped in a dark coat, an aubergine coloured scarf around his neck, the ends blowing in the wind. Looking back to the water and she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. She started to lean forward again slightly, the way she had been for the last twenty minutes. Hearing a rush, she looked back up. The man had suddenly bolted towards her and was now only a few feet away.
“Don’t come any closer. Please,” she managed to choke out, sure that the wind would swallow her words whole.
“I won’t…. I promise. Just… Let’s talk okay. What’s your name? I’m Spencer,” he held his hands up in a gesture of surrender, as if to prove that he wasn’t going to move. His hair was longer than the average males and she could see him fighting to keep it out of his face, the same way she was.
“I don’t want to talk. Just…. Leave me alone. Please!”
“I can’t do that now…. I’m sorry but I’m here now. I can’t walk away. I’m involved.”
“You’re not involved at all. Just leave. Please. Pretend you were never here.”
Spencer rubbed his hands together, blowing on them to keep them warm. It was freezing out tonight. She could barely feel her fingers now, and her legs and feet were starting to feel numb too, the wind whipping through the thin material of her tights.
“I can’t pretend. I am here. And I’m not going to leave. Please just come over the railing. We can talk. We don’t have to go anywhere away from here. We don’t have to even talk about what ever it is that’s made you feel that jumping is the only way out….. We can talk about…. books or films, or colours. Or where you’re from. You’re British right?”
No shit…. She shook her head trying to shake the hair out of her eyes again.
“What good will talking about any of that do? Please just piss off and leave me alone.”
“You’re wearing a lot of purple and lilac, so I bet that’s your favourite colour right? Mine too. See…,” he tugged on the ends of his scarf. “Purple…. And the bag down there. Is that a Cheshire cat keyring attached to it? I’m guessing you’re an Alice fan?”
“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’
‘That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,’ said the Cat.
‘I don’t much care where -’ said Alice.
‘Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,’ said the Cat.
’- so long as I get SOMEWHERE,’ Alice added as an explanation.
‘Oh, you’re sure to do that,’ said the Cat, ‘if you only walk long enough.”
The man read the quote verbatim without even seeming to need to think about it.
But she could quote that book too, and one line in particular seemed very fitting right now.
“If everybody minded their own business, the world would go around a great deal faster than it does.” She raised an eyebrows at him hoping he’d get the hint.
“So you are a fan then? You know the Dodo in the book is actually based on Lewis Carroll himself… Due to his stammer he used to introduce himself as 'Do-do-Dodgson….His stutter actually prevented him from his original career choice which was to become a priest, so he ended up becoming a mathematician and author instead.”
“I’m guessing you didn’t get the hint then?“ she stared at the man in wonderment.
“Oh I got your hint. But I’m not leaving….And I’m really hoping you’re not still planning on jumping because that water looks cold and I really wasn’t planning on getting wet tonight… Well, aside from a nice hot bath which I could really do with now. I’m freezing. And your lips are starting to turn blue,” he talked fast, his sentences streaming into each other.
“Why on earth would you have to get wet?” she was become frustrated now.
“Well if you jump, I kinda have to jump in afterwards and save you.”
“But I don’t want saving, that’s the point” she spoke through gritted teeth.
“And I don’t really want to plunge into a freezing cold river either, but it looks like neither of us will get the ending we wanted. You jump, I jump.” He inched closer and she looked at him sharply. He stopped, if he reached out now, he could touch her.
“Are we in a James Cameron movie or something? Look I really don’t need a Jack Dawson coming to save me. I’m not some poor little rich girl being forced into a marriage of convenience and last I checked, we weren’t aboard a doomed ship.” This was starting to get ridiculous now.
“Titanic right? I can quote that too.”
For some reason, that didn’t surprise her. He moved forward again, oh so slightly.
“Just stay back okay. I’ll let go, I swear it.”
“No you won’t. You would have done it by now.” He grinned, “Told you I could quote it.”
What….. Just what? Why was this happening to her
The grin faded as quickly as it had appeared as he tried again. “Please…. Just, come back over the railing. We could do this all night. I’m not going anywhere and I’m fairly certain you won’t jump with me here, because you’re not the sort of person who would jeopardise someone else’s safety for her own wants.”
“How do you even know what type of person I am? You don’t know me!” she scowled at him.
“You’re right. I don’t know you as a person, I don’t know exactly what is going through your mind right now. I wish I did. I wish I could tell you that everything is going to be okay and I wish I could take away whatever pain you’re experiencing that has made you think that you have no other way out. Can we please stop pretending that you’re actually going to go through with this though. We both know you won’t, not with me here. Come back over, let’s go and get a coffee and talk. It might help. At the end of it, we’ll go our separate ways again and you’ll be free to come back here if that’s what you still want to do.” He seemed to be getting desperate and she realised that he had a point. She wasn’t going to jump with him here. She wanted to do this alone and she would do this alone. And he didn’t seem willing to go anywhere. She could have a coffee with him, and then come back later. Yes, that’s what she’d do.
“Okay. Fine. Have it your way. But I’m coming back later. And you better not follow me.” She turned around carefully, struggling to hold on with now numb fingers.
Spencer moved closer ready to offer assistance, his hand reaching out and gripping the top of her shoulder as she carefully swung her leg back over.
Safely on the other side, she stood, smoothing down her dress and rubbing her hands together trying to get some feeling back into them, before bending and pulling her heels back on.
The man suddenly lunged forward, wrapping his arms around her in a hug ignoring the startled look on her face. She patted his back awkwardly, thinking how quickly the night gone off track.
Pulling away he had a sheepish expression on his face. “Sorry,” he apologised. “I just had a really awful day at work yesterday and if you’d have jumped, you’d have pretty much killed my year. I’m Spencer. Spencer Reid.”
“Yeah you said. Three times now.”
He looked at her expectantly.
Fine. “I’m Seph.”
“Steph?” she’d expected that. It always happened.
“Oh! As in Queen of the Underworld right. Daughter of Zeus and Demeter.” Not a question, but stated as a fact.
“Okay… So…. Erm, well….”
“You mentioned coffee?” Seph wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible so she could get back to her plan.
“Yes! Coffee! Okay. Let’s go get some coffee then,” he reached down for her suitcase and Seph picked her handbag up.
“Which way then, Spencer Reid?”
“Erm…. Well. I only live like two blocks from here? Would it be weird for you if we went there…. There’s not that many coffee shops open right now. I swear I’m not a serial killer.”
Persephone laughed at the last part. “Considering the aim of this evening was for me to wind up dead, I really wouldn’t care if you were. Lead the way.”
A peculiar look crossed his face as he processed her words and he rolled his bottom lip between his teeth before turning and dragging the suitcase away.
“It’s this way Persephone.”
“Seph,” she corrected him, seeing him walking away.
“I like Persephone.”
Seph hurried after him, “Well it’s not your name.”
“You realise you had the perfect opportunity then, to turn around and jump.”
Summary: What happens when Dean gets everything he wishes for?
Characters: Dean x Reader
Word Count: 2,300
Warnings: Lots of angst, Language, mentions of death, mentions of serious medical conditions
A/N: I wrote part one for @nichelle-my-belle ‘s angst challenge! My prompt was “I destroyed myself so you couldn’t hurt me.” I was really happy with how the first part turned out and the story in my head wouldn’t stop. So this was a three-part series, this is the final piece. This part is from both reader & Dean’s POV. I would love any feedback.
Things to ask people you care about (because you might actually want to know)
Sometimes when I have writers block I like to list questions. Questions are one of the best ways to develop a story or a character or just to get thoughts moving in my mind. Here is a list of questions that help me get to know a character:
Things to talk about and possibly ask yourself (Part One)
NAMES what is your middle name? what does your name mean? what origin is your last name? how far back can you trace your family tree? if you could change your name what would it be? did you ever have a nickname? what is the worst thing you have been called? do you use the word faggot or cunt? how do you feel about cussing? do you use the N word? do you ever get annoyed when people mispronounce your name? where were you born? if you had been the opposite sex what would you have been named?
FEARS what are you afraid of most? what animal or thing scares you? do you have any phobias? why are you afraid of what you are afraid of (did you have a bad experience)? what is an irrational fear you have? do you fear death, why or why not? do you let your fears drive your decisions? what are some fears you have conquered? are you afraid of natural disasters? have you ever had a panic attack? what stresses you out?
LOVE do you believe in soul mates? what do you think about divorce as a concept? what are your thoughts on marriage? who was your first kiss? how do you feel about same sex marriages/ relationships? do you think it’s a good idea to have sex on a first date? what is your stance on one night stands? are you more confident sexually when you are intoxicated? sobriety? sex before marriage? is there someone in your life that you are willing to die for? do you think soul mates could be a best friend? who is your best friend? are friends important to you? are you afraid of being alone? how do you know you love someone?
DRUGS have you don’t drugs? what do you consider an addiction? what drugs would you do if you knew there would be no consequences? how do you feel about marijuana being legal? do you think drugs enhance creativity? do you think drugs are okay if they are prescription drugs? have you ever felt addicted to something? do you smoke cigarettes?
RELIGION do you have a religion? are you a strict believer? do you believe in God? do you believe in an afterlife? do you believe in ghosts? do you believe in satan? do you believe in evil? do you believe in science and evolution? do you believe in reincarnation? do you believe we have souls/spirits? would you convert to a religion for your spouse? how do you feel about church? do you pray? do you believe in angels? demons? do you believe in magic, spells, potions, herbal healing?
CHILDREN do you want children? do you want a girl or a boy? how many? twins? what age do you want kids? if you don’t want kids, why not? do you support a woman’s right to choose abortion? if you became pregnant or got someone pregnant would you stay with them/ get married? what eye color is your favorite?
MUSIC who is your favorite artist? your favorite song? your favorite song? what music has changed your life? do you like to sing? what can you sing? will you sing for me? do you like to dance to music? do you like to go clubbing? what do you listen to when your falling asleep? what do you listen to when you work out? would you have sex to music? what helps you get the anger out? can you write lyrics? what lyrics do you connect with? Have you been to a concert? who would you like to see live?
ART what kind of art do you like? what’s your favorite medium? do you paint, take photos, make collages, etc? who is a favorite artist? why do you like or not like art? are you a museum person? would you want your art to be sold or put in a museum if you made it yourself? do you get abstract art? what’s your favorite color(s)? how much would you pay for art if you had all the money in the world? are you a visual art person or a sculpture art person?
BOOKS what’s your favorite word? do you have a favorite book? favorite author? do you get poetry? what is a book you’ve read that has changed your mindset? what book has frustrated you? what book can’t you get through? what book puts you to sleep? what genre do you enjoy most? are you a graphic novel person? how about erotic fiction? or are you a bibliography person? favorite children’s book? favorite nursery rhyme? favorite character? J.K. Rowling, Stephen King, Lewis Carroll, or Jane Austin? what do you consider good humor? what makes you laugh? do you have any good jokes? comics?
MOVIES celebrity crush? best movie? best childhood movie? favorite animated movie? indie films? short films? foreign films? favorite scary movie? are you romance or sic-fi? worst chick flick? worst movie ever? longest movie? titanic or avatar? J.J. Abrams, Quenton Tarantino, or Tim Burton (or all three)? Have you seen the Princess Bride and can you recite the lines? Harry potter? Lord of the Rings? what are you favorite T.V. shows? favorite tv genre? do you like crime/cop shows? what about medical shows? do you like soap operas? if you could play a movie character who would it be? if a celebrity were to star in your life story who would you chose to play you? Woody Allen? are you a superhero fan? if you had a superpower what would it be? Is netflix not the most amazing thing ever? favorite cartoons? black and white movies?
DREAMS what do you want to be “when you grow up”? do you have any regrets from childhood, high school, college, early life etc? do you think money is required to be happy? what is your definition of happiness? what makes you smile? do you daydream? what do you fantasize about? do you have nightmares? do you ever have reoccurring dreams? have you ever sleep walked? do you talk in your sleep? snore? how many hours of sleep do you need to function? are you a night owl or morning person? what’s your favorite breakfast food? do you like to have lazy days in bed? do you like to sleep with a lot of covers? are you a pillow holder? do you move in your sleep? do you use caffeine to stay awake on those rough days? caffein junkie?
MONEY what small jobs did you work as a kid? what is your dream job? do you think money is a good or bad thing in any level- government, social, personal, universally etc? do you donate your money? where would you donate if you had all the money in the world? what would you do with a million dollars? if you got three wishes from a gene what would they be, would one wish be for money? are you a hard worker? do you believe in the american dream? do you think money solves the most important problems? how do you feel about begin in debt? loans? how do you feel about having to pay for higher education? how would you like your tax dollars to be spent? do you support paying for the military? have you ever volunteered for a non profit organization? have you ever discovered money you didn’t know you had? do you get jealous of people who are rich? can you see yourself being a modern day version of robin hood? is money evil? have you ever thought about the fact that the money you usually deal with is really just green paper? if you bought or wanted to have an engagement ring, how big would your rock be? how much do you spend on groceries for yourself for a week? what is your favorite thing to spend money on? what are the guilty pleasures you spend on? what do you spend unnecessary amounts of money on? do you like to buy things for others?
BEAUTY what do you think is beautiful? what are some weird things you like about people? do you have any fetishes? what is your favorite part about your body? what is your least favorite part about your body? what features do you like in yourself and others? what types of personality traits do you like? do you dress well? do you like specific smells? do you like hair, facial hair etc.? heels or no heels on yourself or your spouse? would you rather have someone make you laugh or make you think (or both)? what are your pet peeves? what are some annoying habits you or someone you know has? flowers or diamonds? how do you feel about birth marks? how do you feel about stretch marks? how do you feel about dimples? how do you feel about scars?
TRAVEL if you could go anywhere in the world where would it be and why? where did you grow up? how do you like your neighborhood? what languages do you speak? do you want to learn another language? if you could own three houses anywhere in the world where would you choose to have them? What kind of house do you want/have? are you a city person? do you like camping? what is your favorite exotic animal? do you want pets? do you like swimming? hiking? have you ever considered jumping out of a plane? do you like flying? how do you feel about airplane bathrooms? travel by train, boat, car, or plane? if you could time travel what time period would you want to live in? what age is your favorite style?
TRADITIONS what are some family traditions you have? what holidays do you celebrate? what special activities or traditions do you have with each of your parents? with your grandparents? with your aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.? do you have a favorite meal? how do you usually celebrate your birthday? are you a introvert or extrovert? are you a party person? what type of drunk are you? what’s your favorite snack? do you like chocolate? milk shake or smoothie? juice or milk? cake or pie? what cultural foods do you like? can you bake? can you cook? did you like vegetables as a child? favorite fruit? best cookie? do you have a morning or evening routine? what is a typical day like?
EDUCATION where have you gone to school? favorite class? favorite subject? who was your favorite teacher? do you have any role models? why do you look up to them? what was difficult for you in school, socially, academically, mentally, etc.? were you bullied? were you a bully? what is the worst thing someone has said to you? how did you respond? have you gotten into any fights? did you win? are you sassy? do you have good comebacks? do you ever thing of something brilliant that you should have said way after an incident has occurred? who were you friends with? did you have a crowd? what did you do for fun? did you have to wear a uniform? public or private school? did you hang more with girls or guys? did you party? were you a cool kid? did you stereotype? what was the most valuable thing you had to learn on your own that was never explicitly taught to you by a teacher? when did you start listening to your parents? how did you choose a college? what was your major? did you have an affair with any of your teachers? did you have a crush on any of your teachers? don’t lie. did you ever loose a friendship? did you know someone who died?
HOBBIES how do you spend your free time? what is your favorite thing to do by yourself? do you collect anything? do you have any projects you are working on? have you ever been in a club? do you like sports? have you ever been on a team? are you good at hide and go seek? do you have a favorite game? are you good at uno? card games or board games? mind games? favorite sports team? favorite sport? is physical exercise an important part of your routine? would you rather run or walk? rock climbing or fishing?
DINNING are you a vegetarian? vegan? gluten free? crazy carnivore? do you hunt? do you fish? what is your favorite local restaurant? do you eat fast food? favorite chain restaurant? favorite brand of ice cream? what is the most expensive meal you have ever had? pizza? favorite toppings? have you ever been to a food festival? do you have allergies?
ADVICE what is the best piece of advice you’ve been given? who is the wisest person you know? what advice would you give yourself? what advice would you give a stranger? what would you tell a suicidal person? what would you tell someone who was being bullied? what do you say at funerals? how would you explain death to a child? what age do you think it’s inappropriate to loose virginity? do you think losing the v card is important before college? what do you say to someone who is depressed? what do you do to make yourself feel better? if you raised children what are five things you would want to teach your children? what are two things your parents taught you how to do separately?
MEDICAL have you broken any bones? who was the first person to die in your lifetime? how do you say goodbye to people? were you ever really sick? have you had chicken pox? do you like doctors? have you had braces? how tall are you? do you wear glasses? does your family have a history of mental illness? how old do you want to live? do you have a bucket list?
Miss Mungoe is a hugely talented writer who joined fanfiction.net in April 2009 and has written 56 stories for One Piece,Fairy Tail, Green Lantern: The Animated Series, Fullmetal Alchemist, Jak and Daxter, and How to Train Your Dragon. She describes herself as “twenty-something lit. student with a fondness for inappropriate puns and underrated pairings.”
I’ve already talked about Hard Liquor which is a Gajevy 1920s story and is one of my favourite Fairy Tail fanfictions. I’m also really enjoying Dark Waters, a mermaid AU. Of course, she’s written a lot more that I can’t possibly list here so check out her profile here.
I enjoy her stories a lot so I asked her some questions:
1. How did you discover fanfiction?
By accident, more than anything else. I was just browsing for art when I found some links, and a few clicks later I happened upon the site. Needless to say, I stuck around.
2. Why did you decide to write fanfiction?
I found it fascinating! For as long as I can remember I’ve been making up stories in my head with characters from my favourite novels, video games etc. and for years and years I did it without knowing that if I’d put pen to paper, it would be fanfiction. And so once I discovered that there was a whole community where I could share my stories, the choice was easy. I loved the way the fandom works, with people meeting to share stories and art and headcanons, and I wanted to be part of it.
3. Did you read fanfiction a lot before starting to write it? If so, from what fandoms?
I read some, but it didn’t take very long before I started writing myself. The first fandoms in which I was an active reader were Jak & Daxter, Final Fantasy X, The Longest Journey, Naruto and Bleach.
4. How did you feel when you posted your first fanfiction?
Terrified! I was 13 at the time, I think, and horribly nervous about whether or not people would like my writing, or if I’d get people calling me out on my weaknesses. Obviously, I didn’t have the same grasp of the English language as I do today, but I’m proud of where I started out, and the mistakes I made.
5. What’s the story/meaning behind your username?
I wanted something that didn’t necessarily mean anything? In the spirit of Lewis Carroll I wanted something fun and meaningless; a pseudonym that didn’t connect me to any specific thing or fandom. But at the same time I wanted something catchy, hence the alliteration with the repeated M-sounds in “Miss Mungoe”. I wasn’t super excited about it in the beginning, it was mostly a means to an end, but it’s grown on me.
6. What do you think is your biggest strength and biggest weakness in your writing?
I like to imagine my biggest strength lies in characterization, which is what I put the most effort into. I want the dialogue to fit the characters, and their actions to be believable. My biggest weakness I would say is that I sometimes get a little heavy on descriptions.
7. Do you write original work, other than fanfiction?
I do! I’ve always wanted to publish a book of my own, and I’ve worked on different projects over the years, from short stories to longer novels. I write a lot in English, but recently I’ve started writing more and more in my native tongue as well.
8. Do you find it difficult to work on several stories at once?
Not really, it’s actually how I work best. I’ve always had a knack for working on several different projects at the same time, and I don’t feel it impairs me in any way. The variation, since it’s always several very different stories, helps me from getting into ruts. It actually reflects how I am as a reader: I can never just read one book at a time. I always have at least five, that I move between depending on my mood.
9. Do you have a special ritual or certain things that you do when you write?
I need coffee as well as good music. I make playlists for the fics I’m working on, with appropriate songs to get into the right mood for writing.
10. Do you refer to the original material often to help you when writing?
Yes, I make copious references to the canon material in my AU-stories.
11. Is there an aspect that you don’t like about writing and posting fanfiction?
The entitlement of some of my readers, I think is my number one annoyance. I mostly get wonderful and supportive reviews and messages, but there will always be those who demand without giving much back, and who will hold me personally responsible if I don’t include a ship they want,or don’t take the story in the direction they want it to go.
12. What is the biggest challenge for you when writing fanfiction?
Finding the time, honestly. I’ve also mentioned that I’m a non-native speaker, and even if I’ve got a degree in English and a pretty good grasp of the language, I still struggle sometimes, because my head will think in my native language and I’ll structure sentences that make no sense.
13. What are your favourite fanfictions for the Gajevy pairing?
It’s been a while since I’ve been an active reader in this fandom, but I pop by from time to time. Here are some stories I keep coming back to read:
‘Plans and Execution’ AuroraLeona 'Ironbound Paperbacks’ by Corrose 'Atheneum’ by Lionus 'With the Tide’ by feari teiru 'Make Your Nest and Lay in It’ by Silver Inklett 'Misconceptions’ by Yssa B
14. Who are your top 5 writers that you would recommend to check out?
Choosing a top five in one fandom is difficult enough, but a top five out of all my favourites was extremely challenging, after 10 years with fanfiction. But here are some of those whose works I’ve read so many times I know some of them by heart, and who I would give my left arm to meet, let alone achieve a fraction of their skill: LoquaciousQuark (writes for Dragon Age), notbecauseofvictories (Lord of the Rings + original), leupagus (The Hobbit), Mira-Jade (everything from Marvel to Shakespeare) and tarysande (Mass Effect).
For gajevy, the authors listed in the question above!
15. You’ve written for many different fandoms, why is that? Which fandom do you prefer writing in?
It ties in with why I like to write several stories at once: I like to move about. If I write for the same fandom or the same characters for an extended time, I grow restless and my inspiration wanes. I tend to follow my inspiration wherever it takes me, and sometimes that means writing for a completely different fandom.
My favourite is actually the One Piece fandom. I had a story there on hiatus for years, but the only thing I got was supportive messages, not a single disgruntled or demanding reader, and people were just generally lovely and kind. Some of the other fandoms I write for have a lot of issues with this. I have very little patience when it comes to dealing with entitled readers, but I can’t say I’ve ever come across that in the One Piece fandom. Maybe I’m just lucky, but that’s my experience, at least.
16. Have you had unpleasant experiences with some of your readers?
Not really unpleasant, they’re mostly kind. I’ve had a few people disagree with how I’ve chosen to do things, but that’s about as close as I’ve gotten.
17. Do you think there will be a time when you decide to stop writing fanfiction?
I don’t know, it depends on how my life turns out, I guess? Right now it’s a way for me to relax and unwind; I’m a full-time student working part-time, and writing fanfiction helps with stress. To be honest, I hope I never stop writing it, but at the same time I don’t know.
18. If you could sum up your experience as a successful fanfiction writer in three words, what would they be?
Take. No. S***.
19. Would you have any advice to aspiring writers?
Write. Just do it. One sentence a day or ten pages, it doesn’t matter, just keep writing. Start out with something small – drabbles, ficlets, what have you, and let yourself grow. Improve, take risks, read and reread your work and learn to love it. Dare to make mistakes, and if you do, take a breath and move on. And most importantly: write what you want, the way you want it.
20. Anything to say to your readers and potential readers?
I write a lot for myself, but I also write for my readers. So thank you so much for your support; for being so lovely and for sticking with me even if I’ve got so many different projects going at once and I don’t focus all my energy on that one particular story you’d like me to update. Thank you for all the thoughtful messages and the fantastic artworks, and I only hope I can someday come close to deserving it!
For potential readers: here there be crack-ships and AU. Tread lightly
Thank you for doing this interview and for your wonderful fanfiction! Check out her blog mungoe :)
Over the next hour Charlie told Spencer everything he could, answering all of the profiler’s questions to the best of his knowledge.
The team listened in, taking note of everything the man said and adding it the list of information they already had.
The camps numbers were a lot smaller now, they already knew that from the conversation that had taken place at breakfast. The “elders” now consisted of Lewis and his family, as well as Oliver, Molly and Nicholas; an ex lawyer who hadn’t been there when Alice had. Charlie couldn’t give the exact number of weapons that the camp had left and he didn’t think he could get them all into the armoury undetected, but he knew they’d had to sell over half of what they owned on the black market.
Since the incident with Katie’s blood five years ago, they’d lost their blood buyers. Giving blood was no longer a necessity, the residents had been told; they now had enough supplies. The real reason was that the buyers could no longer trust Lewis to provide them with clean blood, and they weren’t willing to pay to take the chance anymore. The poppies had still provided an income for a few years until the illnesses had broken out and the camp had struggled to maintain and farm the crop. With no one able to properly look after it, the quality had become poor, and again their buyers weren’t interested in poor quality stock. With the income from these avenues dwindling and the number of residents severely reduced, the elders had made the decision to sell some of the guns and a few of the vehicles the camp owned, to generate income in order to buy food and other supplies they needed to survive. All in all, the camp had suffered a number of blows over the years which had put them in an extremely bad position. Although they tried to be as self sufficient as possible, it had only worked when they had the people there to maintain it. The herb garden was a mess and the vegetable crops had been all but ruined, so they were having to start from scratch again, and pay for food in the mean time whilst they worked themselves back up.
This wasn’t good from the elders perspective but from the FBI’s perspective, it was very good news indeed.
“What’s your plan then, what happens now?” Charlie asked when Spencer had ran out of questions that he could answer.
“I need to communicate with my team, later on today. And then come up with a plan to separate Lewis and possibly Rebecca from the others. My team can then approach and take them into custody.”
Charlie nodded thoughtfully. “I could help with that. One of the perimeter gates, it’s been unstable for a while now. Some bad winds over the winter caused it to take quite a bashing and I’ve been telling Lewis that it’s going to come down any night. If I tell him it’s down, he, Nicholas and…. ” he hesitated slightly before continuing, “…. Eric, they’re the best builders that we have here now. They’ll rush to it if it actually collapses. Could your team make that happen if I tell you which gate it is? It’s far enough away from the main area of the compound and it’s a fairly big area with enough places for people to hide undetected.”
Spencer was nodding along with Charlie as he was speaking. That could work. In fact it could work extremely well. But he needed to communicate with the team.
“Can you show me where it is?” Spencer asked him.
“I can later if that’s okay. I have no reason to be seen over that end of the compound now but later I will have. You can come with me then. I do have a question though. What happens…. What happens afterwards? To people like myself and Alice. We’ve done things, but only because we’ve been forced to.”
Spencer understood the younger man’s question, it was one plenty of people in his position would have. He’d essentially assisted in the murder of innocent people and not done anything to stop it, but only because he felt that he had to.
“It’s going to take the FBI a while to wrap this whole case up due to the amount of people involved. Our main concern is Lewis…..”
“….it should be Rebecca as well. She’s a lot more manipulative and dangerous than she’d have you believe. Trust me, she’s had a major hand in some of the decisions made here over the last five years.”
“Alright well our main concern is Lewis and any of the other dangerous elders. The elders were the ones making the decisions to kill people and end their lives, and they were the ones doing it. I know that you and Alice were dragged into that, but the FBI help people who help them. You won’t go to jail Charlie, I can tell you that much.”
“Okay. It’s just going to be so strange not being here. Getting to lead a normal life.”
“I’ll help you Charlie, we’ll help each other,” Alice piped up from where she was stood.
“Alright, we have all the information we need for now. Are we done here because we need to go and choose somewhere else for us to sleep for tonight and possibly tomorrow. I’m hoping that by the night after, this will all be over and I can sleep in my own bed. It’s been a while.”
During the afternoon Spencer and Alice chose another hut to spend the next few days in, making a big show of cleaning it up and moving their few belongings into it. It was closer to the main hall that it was the main house, Alice purposely choosing somewhere as far away from Lewis as she could get.
Before dinner, Charlie came and collected Spencer as Alice was still cleaning, taking him to the gate he’d been talking about earlier and when the two returned, they ventured to the main hall for the evening meal.
The meal was strained somewhat. Alice acted as normal as she could, casually making conversation with Lewis and Rebecca, watching Abby eating out of the corner of her eyes and trying to push away the unexplainable feelings she felt towards the girl. There’d been a lot of tension, caused by Spencer oddly enough. Asking the wrong questions at the wrong times.
“So why the name ‘Wonderland’, Lewis?”
Alice had looked up at her partner sharply, wondering what the hell he was playing at. This wasn’t on the list of questions that they’d needed the answers to, this was a question that Spencer specifically wanted the answers to.
“I just thought it was fitting. A retreat in the middle of the woods, for people who were lost,” Lewis gave his answer as he continued to eat.
“And the use of the rabbit as the symbol?” his voice was conversational and curious, but Alice could see that Dr Reid was carefully watching Lewis’ reactions.
“Rabbits symbolise a lot of different things. Rebirth, growth, abundance, harmony, family. All of the things this camp is about. We will have all of these things when the world falls because we are the only ones who are prepared for it.”
Spencer swallowed the piece of food he was eating. “Alice told me that you couldn’t remember your name when you were first found. Why choose Lewis?”
“It seemed right.” The older man had now placed his knife and fork onto the table and was looking over at him.
“It seemed right? And then when you met Alice, you automatically knew that she was the person who was going to save you all?”
Lewis smiled at Ally and she cringed internally. Rebecca had now also placed her cutlery down and had a sneer on her face when she saw the look Lewis was giving Alice.
“Alice will be the one who saves us all. She’s special, Spencer. As her husband I imagine you know that more than any of us. In the future, she’ll be a major asset to this group. She’ll lead when I no longer can. I always knew she’d return.”
“Have you ever heard of an author called Lewis Carroll?”
Both Alice and Charlie now dropped their cutlery to the table in shock that he’d asked that question. Alice nudged the Agent’s leg hard with her own, not even seeing him register her knock.
“I don’t believe I have, no. My darling Marnie used to read to me when I was first found and placed in the hospital but I rarely read myself. It was my son and Alice who were the bookworms here. Why do you ask, Spencer?”
“No reason, no reason at all.”
Across town Park Ranger Julian Demarco was having dinner with his wife and her brother, along with his family.
Julian despised his brother in law Jonathan. He worked for Rylon County PD and always walked around like he had a stick up his ass, thinking he was better than him because Julian was only a Park Ranger.
Tonight’s family get together was proving to be a lot more interesting than most though. Jonathan was known amongst his family for being a motor mouth, if you wanted gossip spreading, he was the person to tell; he was worse than the women. This evening he was telling them all how the FBI were in town, investigating and working to bring down a cult that were allegedly living in the Blue Dove National Park.
The same cult who made it possible for Julian to take his family on so many vacations a year. He’d known about the group of people living there for years, since he’d started out as a Ranger.
“They’ve sent two people in undercover?” he asked his brother in law, knowing full well Jonathan should not be revealing this information to them.
“Yep,” he mumbled through a mouthfull of food. “One of the Agents and a girl who used to live there. Don’t you patrol that area?”
“Not that specific area of the park no.” Lies, but Julian had become accustomed to lying about the compound.
“It just seems mad that it’s been there for years and no one knew about it.”
Julian nodded in agreement, thinking that after dinner, he’d be making an excuse to go out for a drive.
The man who drew himself into a myth: Mourning Hayao Miyazaki's retirement
The Japanese auteur revolutionised animation with his films for Studio Ghibli
There’s good news and there’s bad news for animation fans. The good news is that Japan’s Studio Ghibli, the company behind many of cinema’s most gorgeously idiosyncratic cartoons, is about to release its latest film, The Wind Rises. In addition, the BFI’s two-month Ghibli retrospective is under way, so now’s the time to see spotless prints of Howl’s Moving Castle and My Neighbour Totoro on the big screen.
The bad news is that Hayao Miyazaki, the company’s 73-year-old co-founder and guiding light, has announced that The Wind Rises will be the last film he directs. Kitaro Kosaka, the film’s supervising animator and Miyazaki’s regular right-hand man, puts his boss’s retirement in perspective. “Studio Ghibli is a studio that exists in order to create Hayao Miyazaki’s films,” he says. “His philosophy and the way he lives his life are connected at a fundamental level with all of his works, and his attitude towards everything is reflected in the characters. It’s like watching a child when you see him drawing, constantly doing his own sound effects.” So what will the Studio do when he isn’t drawing there any more?
like i mean, part of the punk movement in britain in the 70s-80s
the marauders as an underground punk rock band, not like famous or popular but known of amongst the people they associate with
they sing about revolution, and love, and the oneness of the two. they sing about being viewed by earlier generations like a group of degenerates. they sing about equality and freedom and liberty. they also sing about heartbreak and loss and the early summer days of relationships.
james is the lead singer and guitarist. sirius is on bass. peter plays drums. remus is second guitar or keyboard, if needed, and also sings harmony. they record their music at the run-down studio near where peter lives, free of charge because he’s mates with the owner.
james with a heart shot through with an arrow on his neck, and full sleeves on his arms, dragons and swords and knights, a lot of arthurian imagery because he likes the idea of that sort of romance, even though he’s perfectly aware love’s not like that, (and also muggle!james will always be an english student to me so headcanon that he got his first tattoo, a sword in a stone, the night after he finished le morte d'arthur), but mixed in with quotes and images from asimov and clarke and bradbury because he’s unashamedly in love with science fiction, the possibility of it all.
sirius with sailor tattoos, you know the sort, ships and anchors and sea monsters on his upper arms from his stint in the navy when his parents got tired of him causing trouble, all mixed in with some lewd pictures that you have to get right up close to see properly and angry words, ‘revolution is a right’ (paraphrased from victor hugo), maybe, or 'the liberation of humanity is all or nothing’ (from the 1968 paris riots). he also has, running around his right wrist, 'we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars’ (wilde) because well, and around his left wrist 'more an antique roman than a dane’ because he would die for his friends, unquestionably. i would probably fight you over those two.
also he has a white sheep on his ankle and thinks it is hilarious.
remus covers himself in literature, and images from that literature. it’s not - like, none of it is visible unless he’s shirtless or his sleeves are rolled all the way up. he has the last line of gatsby ('so we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past’), bits from prufrock ('do i dare/disturb the universe?’) and 'what matters most is how well you walk through the fire’ because he’s not a big bukowski fan but he loves that line more than anything, he’s got neruda swirled about with colours and wayward images, he’s got the second coming in honour of his granddad who fought in ww1.
peter has the jabberwocky on his left arm and a rocket ship on his hip, and five birds on his right shoulder. he - there’s meaning behind them, but he’s never told his friends, because he’s worried they’ll think it’s funny. (it’s for his childhood, basically; his mum read him lewis carroll and they laughed their heads off, because carroll is fucking weird, man, nothing’s ever made him feel like the moon landing did, and there used to be sparrows in his back garden in the summer, and he would watch them hopping around and feel happy)
(lol i just realised the majority of these are literature-based. i am a parody of myself)
oh!! also they all have the ramones’ logo on the inside of their right arms, because that’s how they became friends and also decided to start a band, over a love of the ramones.
lily’s got tattoos too actually!! (im really sorry how this turned into just a tattoo post but it develops i promise) she keeps hers quieter, secret, because they mean a lot to her - they’re an image of eve and the serpent and delilah cutting samson’s hair, samson’s eyes open and his hands on hers, encouraging, because lily (although part of the irish catholic diaspora) isn’t particularly devout, she doesn’t even really believe in god, she was thirteen the first time an adult man tried to come onto her and her dad told her she shouldn’t have been wearing so short a skirt, and she sees in eve, delilah, her own experiences, one of the oldest stories humankind has to tell.
she also has mermaids, a gaggle of them on her shoulder, because she likes mermaids. who doesn’t like mermaids.
she’s actually an artist!! i mean, she has a day job, she’s not supporting herself off her art, but because her job is manning the desk at the quietest book shop in the world, she’s mostly free to spend her time sketching. she’s relatively successful, actually, she’s able to earn some extra dosh that way.
she is also part of a grassroots mostly youth anti-fascist group who protest at national front marches etc and raise awareness/money for other more prominent anti-fascist groups like CARF. they were present at the battle of lewisham. lily has a scar running down her cheek from it. it’s faint, but she’s proud of it. and that’s how they meet, actually!! sirius hears about the group via benjy fenwick who’s involved in it himself, and they turn up to the next meeting where, of course, james meets lily for the first time.
and she’s never really heard their music before and tbh after meeting james for the first time she doesn’t really want to, because he’s a brash cocky arrogant git (or so she thinks) and doesn’t seem to think this is serious at all. they begin a kind of hate-flirty relationship (tho the hate is entirely on lily’s side, james thinks she hung the goddamn moon) and would happily bicker for the next century or so if lily wasn’t forced into going to one of their concerts.
and the sheer emotion, the passion behind the music, anger and love and exhilaration all wrapped up in song, just overwhelms her. she loves music, of course, but it’s never felt like this, and james catches her eye and smirks at her and her heart is beating out of her chest, and it’s then she realises: fuck, i’m already in this deep.
and she volunteers to design the album art for their baby album they’re putting together, and she and james end up falling in love obviously
that’s it for now folks i’ll let u know if i’ve got more