do not love me though

remember after the trial when taylor literally said that she recognizes how privileged she is and how she wants to help those who are less privileged and everyone just,, ignored it?

effects of parental abuse

+ the inability or struggle to say “no”, because disobedience meant punishment and you are used to being directed all the time

+ being unable to emotionally relate with your family (especially parents, if they are the abuser). concurring thoughts of “i won’t care if THEY die”, or “they won’t care if I die”

+ always afraid/hesitant to confide in someone else about feelings or thoughts, because you are used to being neglected/dismissed when you talk about your feelings, constantly being replied with “get over it”. the consequence of this is that the emotions/feelings pile up inside over time and, when you reach the limit, you suddenly become self-destructive or imminently violent/emotional

+ however, when given the chance to CONFIDE about your feelings with freedom confidently, everything spills out, even if it’s with a stranger or with someone you have not been in contact for very long.

+ you always assume that the answer to every question/statement you say is “no”, even if you definitely know the person is very likely to say “yes”. you prepare for denial and disappointment and feel a huge wave of relief when they say “yes”.

+ being secretive about enjoyment/liking things, or being secretive in what you’ve done for the day, even if it’s not deemed “bad” or “illegal”.

+ simultaneously confused whether you have affection towards your parent(s) or you hate them whole-heartedly, despite knowing that they abuse you. the confusion stems from “well, they’re my parent, so i think they’re doing this because they love me”, though the thought is, of course, false

+ being scared that people will only take advantage of you, as your parents consequently thought of you as an object to benefit from, and not someone to love.

+ being easily attached to others, because you had no parental figure. this can lead you to being easily manipulated and you are very easily controlled. children under parental abuse are also more likely to have “chosen families”.

+ having an “escape plan” or “last resort” if you still live with your parents, just in case they do something worse to you, thinking up of elaborate plans to get out, how you’ll survive, where you’ll stay, etc.

+ being surprised learning that other parents are unlike your parents, and having to have someone/a source to tell you that what your parents are doing is abusive, and as a child you thought it was normal to be unhappy at home.

+ liking school or days out because that meant being away from your parents

+ developing emotional/personality disorders and distorted thinking

Happy birthday Zen!
Here’s my April Fools’ prank. I promised something spicy but you get fluff instead. I hope you’re not making a sad face. I’m smiling (: 

I love myself

@keilattes
daddy 😍😍 I want him to grind on me fuck viktor lol. can he choke me w his tie!!!!!!! ily who r u DRUNK  BANQUET YUURI IS MY BF I WANT HIM TO STEP ON ME HOW DID YOU KNOW???? 😰😰😰 ily I don’t deserve him wtf zeph please kill me /KISSES U THANK U SM <33333 JUST THESE SKETCHES ARE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL & A BLESSING sobs grossly ily

LMAO KEI DO YOU NEED MORE WATER

[FREAKIN BORING]

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I 👏AM 👏HERE 👏FOR 👏SAD 👏ALL 👏MIGHT!
He’s always gotta break my heart.

Based on recent episode and done during yesterday’s livestream.

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~Click and/or open in new tab for better view! this drawing is a LOT bigger than it looks!

I needed a new icon for skype so I decided to draw one; I asked my pal @matchstickz for the pose and we both agreed it needed flowers, so here’s a flower mural caboose! roses and morning glories because they’re my favorite flowers~!

some day I might hate drawing this armor less…but i’m still gonna draw it anyways apparently sfjksafjds

reblogs super appreciated!!

(please don’t repost or use w/o permission, and leave my description; thanks!)

so i remade just over a week ago (prev lovfx and tallgf) and i figured this is a bit overdue since i hadn’t done one on my last blog. i don’t interact w anyone much lately but i want yall to know i’m supporting each and every one of you !! you all make me so happy and make this …… time consuming hellsite a lot better

here’s a little legend: i was gonna do a thing for faves but i realized two things 1) i can’t choose faves bc i love too many and 2) yall probably don’t remember me and would think it’s weird. but anyway !! i love you all so much !!

Keep reading

Simple Writer Tip:

Get yourself an all-time fan. A friend, a family member, a significant other, it does not matter. They just need to be a person willing to read your work and tell you to keep going because they love what you’re doing. Trust me, though it may not help with the editing phase at all, it does help a ton in the drafting phase when you can barely stand your own work.

Note, always tell these people when you’re just looking for positivity. It doesn’t help to receive criticism on these days, especially when you’re working on early drafts.

Stay motivated, keep writing, good luck.

Ideas I just had: A retelling of Avatar: The Last Airbender, but set in the ancient near east with the kingdoms replaced with thematically similar cultures of the second and third millennium BC. Ancient Iran is the Fire Nation due to the earlier precursors of Zoroastrianism that worshipped fire and based their religion and court rituals around it. The water tribe is Ancient Egypt- not sure how that works with the oppression angle, but they are the “hydraulic civilisation” after all and based their cosmos on water. Southern Mesopotamia (Sumerian city-states or Akkad or Babylonian dominion depending on the timepoint) is obviously the earth kingdom because their entire civilisation and conception of existence was based around clay. The Air Nation is the Hittites because of the storm worship/ thunder god angle which is WEIRD because the Hittites definitely weren’t pacifists, but oh well.

Artists hit me up if you want to collab on this, I’m serious.