LANA: Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, Ella Marija Lani Yelich-O’Connor, we are gathered under the waning crescent to bind an evil presence, the current United State government.
LORDE: You know, before we start I just want to thank you again for inviting me. Your mansion is beautifully charged.
LANA: Thank you.
LORDE: Is it..? Is it on Ley Lines? Crossed? *places hand on table* I can feel the ley lines.
LANA DEL REY: Yes, it took years of searching to find this specific location. It’s even been targeted by opposing coven.
LADY GAGA: Hey why does my nameplate say “The Crone?” I get why Lorde is the Maiden and you’re the Mother because you’re a Gemini Cancer cusp but shouldn’t we get Madonn—
LANA DEL REY: *shrieking with the voices of a thousand* DO NOT SAY THAT NAME IN THIS SACRED SPACE. Ahem. Now then. I know I tweeted at my followers to follow the recipe online, but I’ve decided to go a step farther. Since I am such a powerful witch, and this Malibu mansion is the optimum positioning for summoning a demon, I have complete confidence we will be able to destroy evil.
LORDE, concerned: Aren’t demons… evil?
LANA: Yes but they’re less evil than what we are up against. Now Stef, did you bring the candles?
LADY GAGA: Yes *sets candles up, lights them*
LANA: Now, we must repeat this phrase over and over. I gave you slips of paper to read off of.
LADY GAGA: Hey, Lizzy, so I am totally okay with this it seems really fun and you know I can’t be super political now that I released a country album, so I appreciate this opportunity to help, but have you ever like, done this before?
LANA:Of course Stefani don’t be ridiculous. Now then, let us join hands and chant. With intent, ladies.
*they all hold hands, Charmed style, and begin*
*ALL CHANT IN LATIN*
*Lizzy’s Malibu Mansion shutters begin to rattle, a great breeze rushed through, a faint glow appears around the three pop artists*
LORDE: I think it’s working!!
*A spectral figure appears behind Lana*
LADY GAGA: I think we did it?? And we didn’t even have to sacrifice anything?? What was Azealia Banks doing with those dead chickens then…
LANA, with a great smile, turns to face the demon, while the figure also turns around.
Now it’s Lana Del Rey’s turn to gasp.
MADONNA: Hello, Girls.
LORDE: Madonna?? How did we summon Madonna??
LANA, pointing at GAGA: You did this!! You said her name you brought her here!
LADY GAGA: Me?? you’re the one who didn’t specify which demon we were summoning! It isn’t my fault that Madonna just happens to fall under that category!
LORDE: I just don’t understand how you can be a demon? Aren’t demons… not human?
MADONNA: Oh silly girl, I have never been a human. I’ve always been like this.
LANA DEL REY: I had no idea… I thought you were just a very powerful witch, nothing else. What will you do to us?
MADONNA: Oh I’m not going to waste my time on you. I just came here because I could. It was really silly to not name a demon, Elizabeth. You never know who will show up.
*disappears in smoke*
LADY GAGA: I have to say, a lot of things make sense now.
I don’t know why people thought Justine Skye was such an inspiration to black girls. All she was was just pretty. She supports racist WW. Some black girls are so desperate for a black girl representative to ease their self-esteem issues, they hang on to any pretty face. And when that black girl turns out to be problematic and not doing shit for dark skinned girls especially, people are disappointed. This happened with Azealia Banks and now recently Winnie Harlow. Not every black girl that’s social media popular is good for black girls when they rather support racist white women than us. Stop projecting your self-image unto conventionally pretty black girls. You need to look at yourself. Saves disappointment and hurt. Especially when these girls would rather tear down black girls and make them feel below them while caping for white girls trying to look like them. And then shunning fans for opinions and criticisms. But if they want to act like a typical malicious white girl instead of the black girl they are, then so be it.
tbh, shea working with azealia banks feels a bit like a slap in the face. Azealia has unapologetically made several homophobic comments and for shea to work with her and then say that whatever she has done has nothing to do with her, feels like she doesn't want to hold azealia accountable for her actions and the hurt they have caused many of the LGBT community to feel because she can use azealia to further her own career. And yet, she is so very quick to hold Valentina responsible for her fans
No, I’m not gay; No, I’m not straight → songs about and/or made by girls who love girls but aren’t lesbians
1. Girls/Girls/Boys - Panic! at the Disco 2. Manhattan (feat. Angel Haze) - Cat Power* 3. Comet, Come To Me - Me'shell Ndegeocello 4. In or Out - Ani DiFranco 5. La Vie En Rose - Grace Jones 6. 212 - Azealia Banks 7. I Do Both Jay and Jane - La Rissa 8. Free Xone - Janet Jackson 9. Same Love - Angel Haze* 10. Scar - Missy Higgins 11. Beautiful - Me'shell Ndegeocello