phil: the warmest and gentlest of sunshine slipping through a crystal glass of whiskey just an hour before the sun is about to set, like pure honey on a golden brown toast, like the last ray of sun before the sky goes dark-
boring theory: dan and phil have been in a relationship for 9 years
interesting theory: dan and phil have had intense sexual tension for like 9 years but they’re both too awkward to do anything about it and it’s gotten to the point where the audience has to play cupid because they’re dumb bois that don’t know how to emotion™️
okay bc this is longer than some fics i’ve written, i’m not putting the whole thing in tumblr. you can find my disgustingly in-depth summary and analysis of the meaning and purpose of the different parts of ii here! (x) if you have any thoughts, let me know! i’m always curious to see what other people think.