A different Nonnie, but how about that Tommaso couldn't walk away from Johnny either. He sat practically ontop of him after the knee and then ontop of the announce table as the staff looked after Johnny in the end. Like Tommaso can't fully break that connection, even if it's him causing the pain he can't walk away from Johnny.
listen. tess says I karmically deserve these asks for giving people feels but what the hell does she know, so first of all how dare you.
second of all RIGHT???? like. fuck. okay. the PAUSES during the whole sequence are the parts that stood out the most to me. he pauses next to Johnny after attacking him,
he walks away, and then he sees Johnny pulling himself up
and attacks him again. he sits with Johnny
(recalling for all of us other fucking moments when they’ve sat together after matches. times when Tommaso comfortedJohnny after a loss.)
and then Tommaso looks over at the announce table (possibly spurred on by Johnny pawing at his face)
and then pauses again
(while Johnny feels him the fuck up jesus)
he keeps pausing and then when he’s finally done he just sits there while the paramedics/refs help Johnny.
this all plays very well with my understanding of Tommaso. he’s not turning on Johnny because he doesn’t love him, he’s turning on him because he can’t stand being made weak by that love. he’s not angry with Johnny. this violence isn’t easy. he’s forcing himself to do this. it takes effort.
i think in those pauses he’s doing what we saw him do during the CWC match. he’s trying to find the will to hurt Johnny Gargano.
and like you said, he can’t fully break away. he lets Johnny rest his head on his thigh. he sits there at the end not only to survey his good work, but also to watch these people take care of Johnny. something he doesn’t get to do anymore.
you gotta be a special kinda pissed to beat up the dude whos name is on the lease to the house you live in, like tommy ciampa just kicked the ass of the guy who’s home he keeps his clothes and his playstation at. like have you ever been so mad you fought yourself into being homeless?
Eric Livingston is a person from Baltimore, Maryland.
forest diner by Eric Livingston
I. i have an angel that i carry in my pocket. it protects me while i am asleep and when i am driving my car. i can still feel the pull of the world. i wonder if i have brushed lips with death for the last time.
II. you are in your bathtub and your body keeps the water warm. you rise from the bathtub and droplets whisper away from your body. move into me dandelion wind. i can feel sadness seeping out of cold bathwater. the dead space inside of every passing year; floating forever in a field of eyelash daisies.
untitled by Eric Livingston
my friends do not know about the soft black thing inside me when i am talking to them. while i am sleeping it floats next to my bed. it is not for any of them. soon they will start to see it. when i kiss them they will feel it protruding into them and when they are laying next to me they will feel the warmth of it. nothing is keeping me from it and i know one day there will be nothing that anyone can do for me it will become me it will envelope me completely.