How to shave your vag without enduring a week of burning crotch
Shaving ~down there~ can be hella tricky. I have extremely sensitive skin, and coarse-ish curly dark hair, so it’s taken me a few years to figure out what combination of methods works best for me (since I’m incredibly prone to razor bumps), but here’s what I find works best:
1. Trim your hair so it’s maybe a centimetre short at the most? You can’t shave a full bush and you’ll clog up the razor too quickly if your hair is super long.
2. Have a hot shower or bath, and give the hairs some time to soften.
3. Use an exfoliating glove or loofah to gently buff away any dead skin cells. If you’re going to use some kind of scrub or wash, try to go for something hypoallergenic and fragrance-free, ESPECIALLY if you’re not just shaving over the pubic bone. You do not want a yeast infection.
4. Use baby oil to lather up. Sounds weird, I know, but it’s cheap, hypoallergenic, makes it near impossible to nick yourself, and acts like shaving cream.
5. You’re gonna want an intense razor for this, and men’s ones are usually best. Go for something that has 4 blades (I usually use some random Gillette Turbo thingamabob one), and don’t use it if it isn’t new.
6. Shave with the grain (downwards) first. Don’t apply anymore pressure than you need to, or you’ll risk irritating the skin. If you have a handtowel, it’s useful to wipe the razor on it every stroke or two, since the baby oil clogs the razor easily and it’s hard to wash the hairs out.
7. Some people say to only shave with the grain (since the chance of getting razor bumps is decreased) but I think most people who do that probably don’t have very coarse hair - I’m usually left with a bunch of hairs that are still half a centimetre long, which is pointless and looks ridiculous. So after that step, shave against the grain (using quite light pressure) until it looks all good. Try to be as efficient as possible and avoid going over the same area twice.
8. Rinse off, and use a handtowel or exfoliating mitt to wipe off any excess baby oil, leftover hairs, and dead skin.
9. Once you’re out of the shower, pat yourself dry, and apply some rubbing alcohol wherever you shaved. This step burns quite a lot, but it makes it verrrry unlikely for you to get an infection. Seriously, it’s important, don’t skip it.
10. Apply a decent, fragrance-free moisturiser, since the rubbing alcohol can dry your skin out a bit. Wear cotton undies if possible, so your bits can air out properly.
11. Make sure you exfoliate gently each day afterwards. I sometimes get lazy and forget to do this. BIG MISTAKE.
12. Enjoy your dolphin-esque genitalia. Go love yourself down to celebrate.
As a sidenote, make sure you take care of your razor properly. Rinse it off with cold water, replace the head every week or two, and dry it off (or if you’re super-pedantic, store it in a cup of rubbing alcohol).
1. Fold paper in half both ways and turn over.
2. Fold diagonaly both ways.
3. Push two opposite sides together and flatten to a triangle.
4. Fold both upper layers to the midline above and turn form over with top down.
5. Fold the top over the bottom edge, so the tip sticks out a little bit. Not flatten the raised edges (circle).
6. Fold the tip over the side and turn the form over.
7. Fold in half along the centre line bringing both wings together.