dissosiation

If you’re crying bc of the crushing weight of the reality that time is passing and the suffocating pressure that everything you’re doing is Not Enough™ and you know it clap your hands

“Dissociation does not mean that you are defective, damaged, insane, stupid, or worthless. In fact, you are among the most gifted people in the world because it takes intelligence, creativity, and imagination to learn how to dissociate. Congratulate yourself on your ability to survive overwhelming trauma.” - Dr. Bill Tollefson

  • me: Tell me if anything I say or do is problematic! I won't take it to heart, I understand!
  • someone: ok!
  • someone: I kind of have an issue with this thing you did/said :/
  • me,completely taking it to heart climbing out a window: I can never do anything right you're right to hate me I'm so sorry

Dissociative Disorder

- characterized by an involuntary escape from reality characterized by a disconnection between thoughts, identity, consciousness and memory.

Its estimated that 2% of people experience dissociative disorders, with women being more likely than men to be diagnosed.

Treatment for dissociative disorders often involves psychotherapy and medication. Though finding an effective treatment plan can be difficult, many people are able to live healthy and productive lives.


SYMPTOMS:

• Significant memory loss of specific times, people and events

•Out-of-body experiences, such as feeling as though you are watching a movie of yourself

• Mental health problems such as depression, anxiety and thoughts of suicide

•A sense of detachment from your emotions, or emotional numbness

•A lack of a sense of self-identity

fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you you ruined me i will never be the fucking same fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

Experiencing emotions is like chilling in a hot tub except your skin is covered in paper cuts and instead of water it’s hot lemon juice.

dissociation

You see, it doesn’t get you when you’re young

You’ve got the time to   w a   n   d   e   r

I mean teachers might stay STOP!

hoping to engage you, they tell you not to ponder

They tell your parents at nursery that you’ll never make it far

Because lets face it, she’ll never come out of her shell

So just do your best to just try and fit in

They say to you, trapped inside your living hell

Daydreaming’s great when you’re a child

They think you’re lost in a meadow of daisies

And brush it off each day when your eyes look hazy

But no one tells you what to do when you’re nearly twenty two

And I still can’t bring my eyes to meet with you.

In chemistry class you learn that d I s o s I a t I o n  is the splitting of a molecule into smaller parts

As you realise you’d probably forget your entire body if it wasn’t for your rapid heart

The popular kids yell what shall we call her?

And suddenly you begin to feel smaller and smaller and smaller .

You could be in central Vietnam

On a busy London tram

Or lying under an attractive man

Who compliments you on your curvature

But you’ve become part of the furniture

And people at your new job all talk of ya

Saying ‘isn’t she a strange one?’

colleges pass by and say HEY!

But they think you won’t give them the time of day, your mind is miles away

And all you want to do is run

But your minds already started to race

So you may as well stand still, kid.

And hope that your manager wont flip his lid

When you stare in a customer’s face

*jump* The phone rings…

Bring! Bring!     Bring! Bring!

‘H, Hello….operator?’

Beeeeeeep

Sorry, you’ve been disconnected.

not to be dramatic or anything but being alive makes me want to actually swan dive off the nearest building

like if ur coping mechanism is telling urself “you deserve This” over n over until you accept ur fate lmao