discover california

Your dreams aren’t going to stand around and wait for you! You gotta get out there and smash em yourself! Don’t wait for a sign, start now!

Jill Jones recalled how she was driving Prince’s BMW because he and Morris Day had temporarily lost their driver’s licenses. She took Day home from the hair salon and then she was heading back to pick up Prince from the salon. But she had a winter mishap, the cops came and discovered that her California license was expired.

She tried to pass herself off as her mother. The cops called her bluff and she ended up in jail. She eventually called Prince and he came to rescue her before he’d had his curls combed out.

—  Star Tribune, Jon Bream: “Purple City Take 4“, 2017
Avocado Toast-gate Update!

Where Gojiro breaks down the cost of budget-breaking Avocado Toast;

Okay so I’ve never had Avocado Toast before, but I can cook well so I figured How Hard Could It Be? I also don’t usually buy avocados, so to begin with I estimated that they cost approx. $15 apiece. So I went to the store to find out!

IMAGINE MY SURPRISE when at the supermarket, I discovered ripe California Avocados were 3 for $5!! How do they make a profit at this price? I also bought a lemon for .89c and a loaf of sliced Pane Toscano artisan bread for $3.00

Got home, scooped out the avocado guts and added the lemon juice to keep the avocado guts from turning brown, made some toast (brushed the toast with olive oyl, Popeye’s girlfriend) and voila;

Avocado Toast! Here’s the cost breakdown;

Avocados; $5 for 3. 3 avocados make enough spread for approx. 5 pieces of toast. Total cost per slice; $1.00

Lemon; .89c. Makes 5 slices of toast, .18c per slice.

Pane Toscano artisan bread; $3.00 for a loaf of 20 slices. .15c per slice. 

Drizzle of Olive Oyl; Hell it’s a drizzle - maybe .05c for argument. 

Total cost per slice of homemade Avocado Toast; 

$1.38 !!!

Fucking money-wasting millennial kids! No wonder you’ll never amount to anything!!!

It’s time to stop eating Avocado Toast, and start eating the rich. 

2

Frost bitten gusts send chills down my spine as though Father Winter himself has touched me.
As I approach the entrance to this icy kingdom,
the air becomes faint and disappears leaving
nothing but deathly silence, an eerie pause.
I hear voices coming from within the forest
speaking sweet nothings to me, so lustful.

(Lake Cuyamaca, California)