directionlessness

You Sustained Them

Nehemiah 9:21- “Forty years You sustained them in the wilderness;
They lacked nothing;
Their clothes did not wear out
And their feet did not swell.” (NKJV)

Devotion: Do you feel like you are walking in the wilderness? Are you directionless and not feeling equipped to handle the journey? Reflect back on your life and recall times when God provided for you. There’s always a pattern. God will give you exactly what you need at exactly the right time you need it. Remembering this truth will give you strength on your wilderness walk. If you feel exhausted, inadequate, or helpless today, look for God’s sustenance. Sometimes it comes in the smallest ways. 

No offense but I will never get over the attention to detail everyone involved poured into The Prince of Egypt.

One of my favorite things visually about When You Believe is the way it introduces the viewer to all of these incidental characters—nameless fathers and children and old people who have no role in the main action of the story, who appear on screen for a minute at most—and really makes you feel for them.

In one segment there’s a little girl guiding maybe her grandmother up to the main gate out of the city. And here the grandmother pauses, overcome with emotion or fear; she can’t go on.

I never noticed it before, but the inside of the gate is covered in hieroglyphs:

They’re slaves, kneeling with their arms bound behind them. (Next to actual hieroglyphs of slaves at Abu Simbel for comparison.)

There’s an earlier shot of this anonymous old woman gazing over at this wall depicting slaves, the blood and tears of her people sunk into the stone.

She and the child and the rest of the crowd take their first steps as free people past this, and I just.

It’s such a powerful image.

pete townshend writing songs at age 20: haha yeah fuck old people, this is my generation, i love being a teenager, i hope i die before i get old, rock and roll 4ever
pete townshend writing songs at age 21: oh god i’m so old. this is the life of a washed up rock star. my hairline is receding, drugs have ruined me. my wife hates me and my career is over

i’ve been thinking about assigning myself a project exploring black escapism from flying away in old slave’s folktales to afro futurism type stuff. like giving myself a history lesson on surviving horrible shit lol. i already have a lot wrt folktales since i only read those n like hp growing up but i need a starting point on afrofuturism bc i have like Janelle Monáe n that’s it n i want more! anyways who has recommendations? anybody?

Representation

I want to talk for a minute about representation. I’ve seen a lot of posts all over the internet about how gay people are shown in media. A very good example is the reaction to Blizzard Entertainment recently releasing an Overwatch comic depicting their mascot character, Tracer, with her girlfriend. This is the first canon relationship to be revealed for the game, and reactions to it were all over the place. Many were positive. A lot of people, myself included, are happy to see a gay relationship shown in such a normalized way. It’s rare to see a homosexual couple shown in a way that doesn’t exploit or fetishize it, and it’s all the more impressive because of how central Tracer is to the Overwatch franchise. She’s on the cover of the box, her picture is the icon you select for most of the games you’ll play, and she was the first character revealed before the game was released. This is all groundbreaking for a medium typically known for catering to straight, white men to the exclusion of other groups.

But not all reactions were positive, particularly those from people who consider themselves the core audience of video games. Many men were upset that a female character they had been imagining themselves involved with romantically turned out to be gay. They felt betrayed by their ‘waifu’. Some were upset because they are outright homophobes who don’t want to see a gay relationship in anything. But the reactions that bothered me the most were the ones that said things to the effect of “Why should her sexuality be discussed at all? Let us pretend she is whatever we want her to be” or “Making her gay is just pandering to the gay community and doesn’t serve the story”. I have seen identical reactions to people talking about the relationship between Korra and Asami in The Legend of Korra, the former relationship of Pearl and Rose Quarz in Steven Universe, and pretty much any other story that has a gay main character. (oddly, I see lesbian couples far more often than male gay couples. That may just be due to the particular types of media that I tend to follow, or it may be a societal trend based on the idea that lesbians are somehow more palatable to our culture than gay men. I really don’t know.)

Besides being a thinly veiled excuse for these men (I say men because, let’s be honest, they’re all men) wanting her to be straight so they could have imaginary sex with her, it also shows a stubborn refusal to accept the importance of representation. I, like many of the people complaining about Tracer’s sexuality, am a straight, white, cis man. There is not a single piece of media on the planet that doesn’t have someone like me in it somewhere. I can only imagine what it must feel like for that not to be true. Women make up half the population of the planet, but the record high for women’s representation in US media was 30%. Those numbers only get more dismal as you move into more marginalized groups such as gay people and trans people, racial minorities, and religious minorities. Black people are overly depicted in media as criminals, muslims as terrorists, women as sex objects.

My point is, I, and the people complaining about Tracer being gay, cannot understand just how important fair representation is. I can try to; I can make a conscious effort to think about things like that, but I can’t really understand how difficult it must be to be a gay teenager and not see a single person like myself on TV. On the other hand when a trans boy, who has spent his life being told that ‘it’s a phase’ or he’s just a tomboy, or whatever other hateful messages trans people hear while they’re growing up, sees a character like Krem in Dragon Age: Inquisition, who not only has to experience the same thing as them, but can clearly and calmly explain what it means to be trans in a world that doesn’t understand it, how much of a relief must it be? This is a really long way of saying that it’s not pandering to show a gay couple, or to make a main character black or muslim, or any other inclusion of marginalized groups. It’s not ‘the SJWs taking over’, or the ‘gay agenda’. It is telling people who have been excluded their entire lives that they matter too. That we see them, we’re trying to understand them, and that we care about them. 

Robbie D.
The Directionless Director

Jupiter In The Houses

Jupiter In The 1st House

  • Positive Traits: jovial, principled, strong morals and values
  • Negative Traits: oftentimes you stick your nose in other people’s business, you “fix” situations that weren’t even broken to begin with, territorial
  • Celebrities: Renée Zellweger, Kylie Minogue, William Shakespeare, Anthony Hopkins

Jupiter In The 2nd House

  • Positive Traits: studious, methodical, steady
  • Negative Traits: sometimes you forget to relax and unwind, your pride prevents you from asking for help, not very careful with finances (you may find yourself spending too much on impractical things)
  • Celebrities: Jerry Seinfeld, Dolly Parton, Ozzy Osbourne, Keri Hilson

Jupiter In The 3rd House

  • Positive Traits: you always see the bigger picture, sharing, you constantly expand your horizons 
  • Negative Traits: you feel directionless a lot of the time, you have difficulty living in the moment, you spread yourself too thin
  • Celebrities: Mark Hamill, Jack Black, Hilary Swank, Emily Dickinson

Jupiter In The 4th House

  • Positive Traits: pleasant, amazing hosts, protective of your loved ones
  • Negative Traits: you may depend on others to create an upbeat outlook on life, not good at dealing with change, emotions are overwhelming
  • Celebrities: Liam Neeson, Cher, Miranda Kerr, Albert Camus

Jupiter In The 5th House

  • Positive Traits: lucky, jolly, brave
  • Negative Traits: egotistical, you interfere with situations in an unhelpful way, tendency to misread others
  • Celebrities: Iggy Pop, Stevie Wonder, Natalie Wood, Lauren Bacall

Jupiter In The 6th House

  • Positive Traits: productive, trustworthy, spiritual
  • Negative Traits: you think your way of handling things is superior to others’, unwilling to listen to suggestions, harshly serious
  • Celebrities: Queen Latifah, Chester Bennington, Léa Seydoux, Carlos Santana

Jupiter In The 7th House

  • Positive Traits: accommodating, gracious, fair
  • Negative Traits: not objective when it comes to making your own decisions, not fond of taking the lead, disorganized
  • Celebrities: Ricky Martin, Sylvia Plath, Chelsea Handler, Tiger Woods

Jupiter In The 8th House

  • Positive Traits: sphinx-like, talented, you research everything
  • Negative Traits: you reveal very little about yourself, obdurate, cynical
  • Celebrities: Daniel Day-Lewis, Nelly Furtado, Elijah Wood, Christine Teigen

Jupiter In The 9th House

  • Positive Traits: earnest, insightful, open
  • Negative Traits: friends and family may feel abandoned by you, always on-the-go/busy, may gain a reputation as being pretentious
  • Celebrities: Brooke Shields, Tobey Maguire, Karen Carpenter, Andrew Garfield

Jupiter In The 10th House

  • Positive Traits: winning, ethical, you go after anything you want
  • Negative Traits: bad attitude when you collaborate with other people, sometimes inconsiderate, tyrannical
  • Celebrities: Naomi Watts, Debbie Harry, Billy Corgan, Kurt Russell

Jupiter In The 11th House

  • Positive Traits: cordial, tolerant, kooky
  • Negative Traits: difficult to pin down, jittery, things bore you rather quickly
  • Celebrities: Liam Payne, Sid Vicious, Amy Adams, Jamie Lee Curtis

Jupiter In The 12th House

  • Positive Traits: meditative, altruistic, wholehearted
  • Negative Traits: intense fear of failure, lack of confidence, afraid of standing up to your problems
  • Celebrities: Usher, Diane Keaton, Zoë Saldaña, Gerard Way

- This is an AU/Crossover of the movie Tokyo Godfathers and Noragami -

Alone and lost, Hiyori finds herself in a dark alleyway clear across town and separated from her family. She spots two youngsters that seem the least likely to attack her and quickly asks for assistance. Little does she know that Yato and Yukine are both homeless buggers on the run from a crazy she-bitch named Bishamon that’s out for their blood. Put in an abandoned baby and you have yourself a sitcom!

Details:

Yato’s lived on the streets his whole life. He hopes to get enough money for a one-way ticket to the USA where he hopes he’ll hit it big and leave his crazy family behind him.

Yukine is a runaway that left an abusive father. He’s pretty directionless and doesn’t really have the urge to ‘find himself’ like Yato is. He’s the responsible one, pulling Yato out of sticky situations. Needless to say, Bishamon has him on her list because he associates himself with Yato. Part of him wants to leave, but he ends up staying with his idiot friend for some reason even unknown to him.

Daikoku and Kofuku are the owners of a seedy bar. They (mostly Kofuku) let Yato and Yukine crash in their place. Daikoku always nags Yato about a job, but apparently nothing ever seeps in beyond his skull for Yato to listen to his advice.

Dear Miss Grant,

Directionless self-pity.  Yes, I suppose it is too much to ask for some kindness with my life-lessons.  But between you and Snapper and your constant need to remind me that life isn’t fair, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised by the ‘inadequacies first, comfort later’ approach.  The more things change… right?

I fight, all the time, so I can fight through this too, with a smile on my face and a skip in my step.  That’s how you see me, after all, a Disney Princess with a bluebird on my shoulder, a song in my heart and a shadow in my wake.  That ‘street urchin’ needed me, or so I thought, but don’t worry.  His charms are of no interest to me and I am fully focused on being the entitled upstart Snapper believes me to be.

I’ll hold my breath until I’m dizzy if it means feeling like I’m actually getting somewhere.

James is doing a fine job in your stead, as far as I can tell.  He’s becoming decisive and he’s taking ownership of his choices.  He even yelled at Snapper.  But he seems unmoored too.  He doesn’t talk to me much anymore and I get the feeling he’s hiding something.  But we’re all entitled to secrets, aren’t we?

For the record, I could never be disappointed in you, Miss Grant.  If anything, I find your search for answers you may not have as inspiring as the drive you exhibit when you know exactly what you want.  I’m… proud of you, odd as it may be to hear that from me.

Supergirl is very busy.  Things in National City have gone a bit alien since you left.  I’m sure she wishes she could have made the trip.  Have patience with her.  Courage in one thing does not necessarily translate to fearlessness in another.

You are missed.

Kindly,

P.S.  I’m having disturbing flashbacks of my drunk phone shenanigans.  I only hope they are hallucinations and not memories.

anonymous asked:

So you're going to "give it to us straight" about Niall like you did about Harry right? 👀👀👀

I’d like to see Niall with a girl who grounds him a little.  He seems kind of directionless right now with all of his travelling from here to there and doing whatever.  I’m sure that will change once his album comes out and he goes on a tour but Niall seems to be one of those humans who is sort of “homeless” until he finds someone who represents home to him.  And then he’s all about her. 

They would be that loud, boisterous couple in public.  The kind of couple everyone loved to be around.  But in private there would be this intense connection.  

They would have no secrets between the two of them.  About anything.  Not even little things.  

Niall would be her top priority which is not to say she doesn’t have goals or aspirations of her own.  But Niall isn’t the needy type so if he was verbalizing that he needed her…she would definitely drop everything to be there.  They would have the kind of relationship that is very “teamwork” oriented.  The kind that other people described as “If you see Niall, _____ isn’t too far away.”  And somehow that doesn’t seem creepy or co-dependent…it’s just them.

He would love the fact that she never bothered him when he was watching an important sporting event.  If she watched it with him she would simply read quietly or enjoy it with him if it was a sport she liked.  He would enjoy her sense of humor and the endless stream of shit she gave him for things.  He would be amused by the fact that she can’t do anything domesticated whatsoever but that doesn’t stop her from trying.  He would enjoy watching her do yoga in the morning while he sipped coffee in the kitchen.  He would like the fact that they held different political views and could debate and argue but never get to that point where a fight ensued.  He would LOVE it that whenever he laid his head in her lap she automatically scratched his head with her nails without him having to ask.  He would like taking showers with her in the morning which were never sexual, just intimate.  He would enjoy sitting across from her in a restaurant, holding a glass of beer while she held a glass of wine and would tell him a funny story from her childhood.  He would love hearing her talk, the sound of her voice would be his calm.  He would love it that she was not deterred by overzealous, sometimes nasty fans and just simply shrugged it off as a part of his job.  His kink would be that she had a job, friends and a life of her own that he was a big part of but was still separate from their life together.  He would constantly post pictures of her on his Instagram and when she was mentioned in interviews he would have that huge cheesy ass grin on his face that he gets sometimes when he’s really excited.  He would have trouble sleeping at night if they weren’t together because her warmth always kept his demons at bay.  

Bower

It’s hard to find a happy medium
I pull inspiration from both columns

Tropic air mixes
With Canadian trade winds
The sky is a molten blur of orange

Peach hues blush
Grasses weave directionless

Follow me
Into the green

A cove of ancient contemplations
Painted shades
Refracting needy dreams

Collected sighs
Fall insufferably soft

Chase me
Through the arbour tunnel
Cresting levees, wind shook leaves

Arousal free
Of classic contempt

Taunts from your tongue
Speak something similar

Lofty breath
On my covetous neck

problems i’ve experienced on zoloft:

  • having trouble feeling like a real person
  • having little to no sense of time passing
  • often being unable to discern things that happened in a dream from reality
  • dulled reactions to most things
  • feeling directionless and perplexed and lost
  • not remembering if interactions with people were real or not and needing validation that i didn’t just dream my whole day (sometimes what i thought happened really WASN’T real)
  • dissociating frequently

does anyone else have these issues? i’ll put my diagnoses in the tags

buzzfeed’s “which bojack horseman character are you” quiz should have a bunch of fun and quirky questions but only one result which is “you’re a lonely and directionless real life human trying to project fictional characters’ personalities onto yourself because you have no strong concept of your own identity”

AU #1: Hear Me (2)

things look good, there’s a second part

one


The new wings tear through his skin and Warren is a new man.


“I don’t understand, Mom!” You shout, storming around the counter so she’ll meet your eyes, but she stares over your shoulder. “He’s getting hurt! Why aren’t I there? It says a great struggle, why aren’t I there to protect him?”

Her silence tells you nothing and you want to scream, if not for the disquiet in the back of your mind. The same place the itch had come from. The same place the scream had come from. You were connected and he, you knew that now, needed you. And you… Were directionless.

“Please, Mom, just help me. I can’t- I don’t know what’s happening.”

Your begging seems to break through to her and when she meets your eyes, they’re filled with pain that has your breath catching.

“Great struggle is a relative term, Y/N, and this is not his great struggle.” She whispers, the words jagged and filled with a softly aching fury. You don’t understand, but you know. Know how much it hurts for her to speak of soulmates.

“Thank you.” You whisper and her gaze turns from you, her hands holding a barely discernible shake as she pulls open the fridge.

“What would you like for dinner, dear heart?” She hums, frowning into the fridge and she is the mother you know again.

“Fried rice. I have such a craving.” You suggest and when she turns around, she’s smiling.

“Perfect. Order in then?” She asks, her eyes never quite settling on you, as usual, and you nod, grabbing the takeaway menu from the corkboard.


“Who even are you, bitch?” Emily snarls and you jerk, blinking at her suddenly looming face.

“Pardon?” You ask, a slight amount of accusation to the word. Because there has to be a reason behind this behaviour, but you’re definitely not the real person to blame here.

“Spreading rumours about me? Want your five seconds of popularity, do you?” She scoffs, shoving you backwards and you teeter on your feet, before regaining your balance and squaring your shoulders.

“I haven’t said anything about you. You’re talking to the wrong girl.” You explain calmly, though you’re seething inside, the disquiet from the other night flaring with rage that you’ve been challenged, singled out, attacked. He’s effecting you too much, you think distantly, but Emily is in your face again and your fingers are curling.

Everyone heard you saying shit about me. Why not just admit it, that your life is so pathetic that you need to gossip about someone else’s?” She hisses, stepping close to you, her chest almost brushing yours and your teeth grit.

“I think you should step back, Emily.”

“Are you gonna hit me, little bitch?”

“I might. Or I might grab your hair and drag you down. Or knee you between your legs. Hell, I could drive the heel of my hand upwards and then let’s see how your pretty little button nose looks.” You breath, the words barely leaving your lips and Emily stiffens, her hand rising up beside you and reflexively, you catch it and squeeze.

Her eyes widen, the pupils dilating and her lips parting as you squeeze.

“Tell me again how pathetic I am, Emily, tell me how I’m the one spreading rumours about you and not the girls you call your best friends?” You whisper, your lips barely moving and she inhales a shaky breath. Shoving her wrist away, Emily stumbles backwards and blinks at you, clutching the limb, and you glance at the claw marks on your hand distantly. Pride seeps through your mind, a dark sick sort, one that relishes the blood seeping to the surface of your skin. Pride that you know will wind through your thoughts every time you spot the bruises that’re blooming on Emilys wrist.

“Bitch.” Emily whispers, her lips twisted into an ugly shape as her friends converge on her, encircling her and guiding her away, all the while shooting you demonic looks and tittering to each other.

As the pride fades with Emilys disappearing form, a sick feeling fills your stomach, flipping your breakfast.

“Oh, God.” You whisper, trying not to gag, or panic more than you already are. Lightheaded, you stumble over to the tree, your shoulder landing against the bark roughly. Sinking, you kneel in the dirt and stare at your claw marked hands, your eyes going blurry with tears.

That’s not you. You aren’t like that.

But your soulmate is?


thoughts? places you think i should take this? kiddding i already wrote it all haaa (or at least like 5 parts)

three