SPN Family vs Beliebers - Jurassic Park Style
So looking at the state of Tumblr these days my brain has decided to compare the odd fandom war that is going on to Jurassic Park. I feel the need to put this out there so that it will stop plaguing my brain. (Also my eyes hurt from digital inking so it gives me something to do till I can see properly again) Let’s begin!
Tumblr….at the beginning. A land of wonder and excitement and creative promise! A land of peace and harmony.
As time passed life moved on and things evolved and the species of the Fandoms were introduced to this land. One of the most promising of these species were those of the group Supernaturalus Apocolypticus aka Supernatural Family.
In a startlingly short amount of time, this particular species grew in size and ferocity but was able to live in peace with the rest of the Tumblr inhabitants, including the less intense Fanominius Normalis aka the Normal People and the ever migrating Visitorious or simply Visitors. Even the younger Directionarious Vocarious (Directioners), though occasionally picked on by larger and older Fandoms are happily welcomed into the ecosystem and good sports on all fronts, holding their own and knowing when prey is too big for them. This was all possible by means of trenches, plant barriers, and a few 10,000 volt electrical fences (tags, likes, searches, and reblogs) set up around the land so that interaction was choice based and only happened if intended. Though the circle of life lends to some occasional unintended casualties (as well as mutations) on both ends, the remaining peace is natural and cherished.
Tumblr…..let’s say a month ago. However, things did not remain peaceful due to the introduction and imminent interference of the Beliebercus Maximus or Beliebers for short. Though much younger, less evolved, and less equipped than the Supernatural Family this new species has dug its way into the habitual lands of near every fandom. However, holding tight to their remaining peace the rest of the Tumblr inhabitants have chosen to take action…by ignoring their existence. Expecting these Beliebers to be much like the Directioners, several of the larger Fandoms decided, over time, to try poking fun at them occasionally. While some did take it in good sportsmanship other Beliebers retaliated with annoying squawks like a hoard of Compsognathus (Compies). This however, lead to increased dislike (dare we say detestation) of these specific Beliebers due to their natural intolerance and annoying retaliation. But for the most part, the considerable peace remained.
(Tip-Toeing around the Beliebers)
Tumblr …..last week. Deciding enough time and adaptation had passed since the introduction of the Beliebers to the land Tumblr, one of the flock leaders of the Supernatural Family, the Moosesaurus Rex, poked the Beliebers’ leader, the Justicus Biebercus, with a joking roar (twitter tweet). Again some of the Beliebers understood it to be a passing matter and laughed it off while others responded with threatening barks which shutdown of the electrical fences (THOSE FENCES WERE THERE FOR ALL OUR OWN SAFETY!!! NOW NO ONE IS SAFE!!! RUN, RUN YOU FOOLS!!!!)
While the Supernatural Family is known for its witty humor, light heartedness, and ability to take a joke, they do not take death threats lightly (they are death threats after all so who would). So naturally, they went into a rage and began to rampage the entire land of Tumblr. They increased their numbers and power by rallying together the other Fandom species who for so long missed their original peace prior to the introduction of the Beliebers. Seeing this as a chance to “teach” the Beliebers what it means to be in a diverse ecosystem with species of varying strengths and ages, they decided there was no greater opportunity than now since the Supernatural Family had long since proven its earth shattering power and astonishing size, not to mention their studying and mimicking of much older and greater Fandoms such as the Lordarin Ringasticus and Tolkieniarus (Ringers and Tolkienites) along with the Startarius Trekasaurus (Trekkies) and even the Mythocus Ancetorious (peoples who just love mythology of all kinds), the oldest of all Fandoms, The Ancestors. And thus, all hell (and heaven) broke loose (literally, look at Crowley and Abadon and Balthazar go!) A new, more dangerous, more lethal, much larger, overall Cthulhu levels of ‘get the hell out now’ creature has been born to face the Beliebers, and unfortunately innocents (usually Normal People and Visitors) are getting caught in the middle, eaten on abandoned landing strips, chased down San Francisco streets, and hunted through industrial kitchens (See that long grass, yeah, stay out of it).
My assumption based on studying the history of these Fandoms in the land of Tumblr is that they will most likely succeed in their task of protecting and reclaiming their homelands, defending the honor of the Moosesaurus Rex, and hopefully, though not probable, teaching the Beliebers that they would be welcome to Tumblr if they got their heads out of the sand and realized that their “idol” is not God (rather more like John Hammond, someone who likes to play God but does not understand what it means to even be a ruler) and that you can like and follow someone while still realizing, understanding, and accepting that that make mistakes (sometimes really stupid ones…And also how to take a joke.) The devastation will be great and chaos will abound. No doubt much time will need to be taken to restore order to the land of Tumblr (any of you SPN fans feel like we just survived the Apocalypse AND the Leviathans AND psycho Cass all over again….you get the broom, I’ll find the duck tape).
But order SHALL be restored and Tumblr will once more be a land of peace and harmony and no doubt greater diversity and interaction due to the colossus unification of Fandoms that may have never met before. The future will be bright and new species and hybrid Fandoms will be born and introduced! ….let’s just hope we don’t have to do this all over again. After all, it’s not like this is a Spielberg movie or anything….
Yes…This has been a very weird rant/post but I do hope you enjoyed it.