dinosaur plate

9

My First Brunch!, Part 1

Two weeks ago, I went to my first brunch! My first order of business (after charming all the beautiful ladies at the table) was investigating everything on the table. By far the most exciting item on the table was Mommy’s kale salad—which I got to eat!

I had a scene planned once where the human protagonist, after months trapped wandering through the wilds of an alternate dimension, was invited to be the guest of honor at an otherworldly court. She was understandably apprehensive about this, as she’d spent a great deal of time just trying to avoid being eaten, but the hosts were genuinely well-meaning and did all sorts of things to make her feel welcome and appreciated. Unfortunately, their cultural understanding of Earth and humans was… limited, so the ‘familiar Earthly comforts’ they offered her were things that just… missed the mark–

What do humans love? Is it… suits of plate armor? Dinosaur bones? Mickey Mouse? Pornography? Plastic?

I just loved the idea of her sitting down at this glorious feast with strange and wonderful beings capable of magic beyond imagination and being served… Wrigley’s chewing gum. Melted, because humans like to heat their food before eating it, right? They’re all so curious and eager to please their exotic human guest and make her feel at home, they’re genuinely trying, but they can’t easily conceive of such a short-lived species with no collective memory, so ideas of rapidly temporally/geographically changing culture are basically incomprehensible to them.