didn't like your face in it

  • Kitchen Nightmares UK version: "Mushrooms on toast is a simple dish. Just mushrooms on toast. Yours was actually pretty good, there was just a lot going on you probably didn't need."
  • Kitchen Nightmares US version: COMING UP NEXT ON KITCHEN NIGHTMARES *Ride of the Valkyries plays* *50 tracks of explosion sounds* CHEF RAMSAY DOESN'T liKE THE F00D??????!!!!!! *strobe like montage of Gordon Ramsay eating intercut with atomic bomb stock footage* "WHAT THE F%%% IS THIS F%&%ING GARBAGE????" *Chef throws plate* *shot is repeated 4 times* "UNF%%%ING BELIEVABLE" *SURROUND SOUND MACHINE GUN SOUNDS* *graphic of Gordon Ramsay literally throwing a knife at your face* *sound of shattering windows*
3

Hypothetical Handplates scenario in which Sans realizes he can teach himself Common.

(Ugh, tumblr is making them blurry for some reason so I guess full-view if you want the not-blurry version??)

Convoluted explanation incoming. Handplates is an Undertale fancomic by @zarla-s and if you like Papyrus and Sans, go read it, is good stuff. So I guess this is an AU fancomic of an AU fancomic? I dunno, the idea wouldn’t leave my brain until I did something with it. So. Zarla did a Christmas doodle where Gaster gave the boys a box of ginger cookies that had the word COOKIES on the side in big letters, and because my job gives me way too much time to think about random stuff, I realized something.

In Handplates, Gaster taught the bros to read and write Wingdings but deliberately did not teach them monster Common (ie: English) so they can’t read his nametag or anything. Thing is, Wingdings is a 1:1 substitution cipher for English. Every Wingdings symbol exactly equals an English letter; it’s not a different language, just a different set of pictures. As somebody who has taught herself a fair number of substitution ciphers, there are a few things you look for when you’re trying to translate a code and you don’t have a key in front of you. Most notably, single-letter words (in English they will usually be A or I) or double letters next to each other. Like the OO in “COOKIES”.

Sans is smart. Gaster has fed them junk food before and odds are good Sans knows how to spell “COOKIES”. The word is on the box in huge letters and Gaster just said it out loud, so it is fresh in Sans’ mind. That double-O is a huge tip-off. He would put it together that the word on the front of the box matches what’s inside. Once you figure out a few of the letters, it becomes steadily easier to decode the rest.

I feel like Gaster exposes the boys to enough Common (the nametag, food wrappers, computer monitors, the books Sans sits on) that Sans could pick it up with a proper starting point. Papyrus probably not, because he had a hard enough time with Wingdings, but Sans is eager for any opportunity to undermine Gaster and I’m sure he’d jump at the chance. In this comic he elects not to tell Papyrus, though. He doesn’t know Gaster has cameras in the cell (or even what a camera is) but he’s figured out that Gaster can spy on them somehow, and the last time Gaster caught them learning something he didn’t like, Papyrus got the ever-loving hell beat out of him. So Sans keeps quiet about it for now. And thus starts the long-standing tradition of keeping important secrets from his brother.

On the technical side, it took me a freakin’ week to sketch and outline this whole thing. Coloring and shading only took me like a day. In the meantime Zarla actually kinda addressed the cookie comic, but this was almost done by then so oh well. I’m finding my poses and proportions turn out a LOT better when I’m doodling skeletons, like what, drawing basic anatomy will make you better at anatomy, you don’t say?? A lot of this was a self-challenge to see if I could imitate Zarla’s art style, and I referenced previous Handplates comics a lot for the backgrounds and Sans’ face. Full disclosure: Gaster’s pose up there is basically copied from Zarla’s original comic because I was rushing through to get on to the actual meat of the story. He’s just here for setup. I had fun trying to figure out how to do his Lost Soul head though. Also, I hate Papyrus’ face from the front. Also also, it was tricky trying to convey “mentally translating an unknown alphabet into a known one” when pretty much everyone who sees this comic is already familiar with the “unknown” one and not the “known” one, but I think I pulled it off. 

TL;DR- I imitated somebody else’s style to do an AU of an AU; I am not Zarla; Zarla is the creator of Handplates and also Gaster’s pose in the first panel; I like ciphers too much and also I gave the cookies icing because that is the only kind of ginger cookie I know.

Andromeda crew character summaries for people who haven't played the game
  • Cora Harper: Space mom. Likely puts a nutritious meal and cute little notes with smiley faces in your lunchbag. 10/10.
  • Vetra Nyx: Spiky space mom. Likely puts twenty bucks and a can of pringles in your lunchbag. 10/10.
  • Liam Kosta: Excellent space boy. Basically human sunshine. His smile has probably already cured you of a disease you didn't know you had. 10/10.
  • Nakmor Drack: Cranky space grandpa. Probably that one person at the family party who gets drunk on booze you didn't know you had and falls asleep against a wall. 10/10.
  • Pelessaria "Peebee" B'Sayle: The "hold my beer, watch this" space friend. I aspire to give as few fucks as her one day. 10/10.
  • Dr. Suvi Anwar: Absolutely adorable. A sweet, precious baby unicorn. Gorgeous. Licked a rock once and the rock blushed. 10/10.
  • Gil Brodie: Irreverent space engineer. That one college classmate who lets you copy his answers, but u have to buy him a beer after. Would probably lend u his kidney if u asked for it. 10/10.
  • Reyes Vidal: The one space uncle who looks and sounds like your dad but makes finger guns way more often and has way more money than him. You don't know why. You're not sure you want to know why. 10/10.
  • Kallo Jath: That one hipster dog-walker on the street who just seems super chill all the time but is currently wrangling 7 overly excited puppies who all want to go in different directions. You want to be his friend. You want to be him. Secretly the puppies are all his emotions. 10/10.
  • Jaal Ama Darav: Please just be kind to him, he's crying his best. 10/10.

sometimes self care is doing what you want like staying in bed that extra hour or buying the expensive smoothie, but sometimes its forcing yourself out of bed to eat or making sure you wash your face and clean your teeth despite how exhausted you are
self care isn’t always the easy option, or the fun option, but it’s still important

  • Winn: Whoa, Lena what happened to your face?!
  • Maggie: Yeah little Luthor looks like you ran into a pole.
  • Lena: *covers bruised face* Oh well something in the lab and an experiment went whoosh it was bad so naturally you know my face and getting injured- *waves hands around*
  • Alex: *sighs* Kara kissed you and broke your nose didn't she.
  • Lena: ...Yes.
  • Kara: *pouts* It was an accident.
  • Alex: *pats back* It always is Kara.
  • Lena: *winces and smiles* If it's any consolation you're a very good kisser despite the broken nose.
  • Kara: *sniffles* Helps a little.
9

So, I bought a kind of a miniature dragon for my Dragonknight, and immediately ended up sketching like 3-4 pages worth of silly doodles about their interactions. So here: the adventures of Davius and Snek.

I can’t believe I actually took time to color and shade all these. o_o Ah well, good practice to ensure that my new system works properly.

8

BTS’s reaction to GOT7′s performance of Hard Carry at the 31st Golden Disc Awards 

Yeah, about that - INTP

INTP: *in a job interview*

Interviewer: So, as you might know, we have a get-together next Monday - …

INTP: Oh, yeah, I saw that on your website. Already marked it in my calendar!

Interviewer: Oh! Oh, nice. I like organized people :)

INTP:

LEE JONG SUK = GENIUS/TALENTED ACTOR


Thank you for all the love on the previous one I had posted!! <3

X

2

“He’s a good man, that boy." 

You turn away from pouring yourself a drink to face your grandmother, who is smiling at you. "Thor?” you ask. She nods, and you smile softly to yourself. “Yeah, he is." 

"He’s telling your great grand-father quite some stories.” She winks at you. “I just hope they’re all true." 

You laugh. "Well considering we met when he was pulling me out of a pile of rubble, they probably are.” Your grandmother pats your shoulder gently and moves away to talk to your cousin. You watch her briefly before moving to the doorway leading to the living room. 

Thor sits on the couch with your great-grandfather seated next to him and your father in the arm chair diagonal of him. He’s waving his arms somewhat wildly as he tells one of his wild stories-probably one from another one of the nine worlds by the way he seems to be speaking. You smile and turn away to go join your sister, not wanting to interrupt the moment. 

As nervous as you were to bring an alien home to meet your family, you could not be happier.

(fun fact: i searched the whisper photo to know who are the guys in the background and shut-your-ass that’s elijah wood i just made my everything-is-fucking-connected todd brotzman face)

hey-therejuliet  asked:

Your blog is simply amazing. I've read all of your prompts and godd I didn't think I could love this pairing more but you've made it possible. I was wondering though. Could you write a fic where they don't know what personal space is.. like they're always graviting towards each other but don't realize it until several people point it out. You would make my day like you did today and put so many smiles on my face and I felt really giddy. Love your work so much 💕

Hey, you’re awesome! Thanks so much love! I love this prompt, I could totally see it happening on the show.

***

Reaching over to grab a handful of chips out of Betty’s lunch box, Jughead threw his arm over her shoulder, effectively dragging her even tighter against his side.

Kevin elbowed Veronica in the ribs, causing her to turn and raise an eyebrow in annoyance, dramatically throwing his eyes over to the pair he made some sort of quiet noise along the lines of “mmmhmm”

Veronica’s eyes widened at The sight in front of her, Betty leaning into Jughead while his arm was wrapped lazily around her. To anyone else in the world you would think these two were a couple, the level of comfort and intimacy They shared was unbelievable, they didn’t even seem to realize the closeness continuing with their conversations as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

“Strike two.” Kevin whispered into Veronica’s ear with a wicked smile. She returned it and quickly sent a text to the redhead sitting across from her.

VERONICA: Cheryl, you seeing this?

Cheryl’s eyes turned up from the text on her phone, casting a glance to Betty and jughead

CHERYL: this is totes nothing compared to the walk to physics class.

Veronica laughed out loud remembering the hilarious scene she had watched take place.

Betty and jughead couldn’t seem to stop tripping over each other, every time Betty would move right Jughead was right on her heels, stepping on the backs of her flats, if jughead moved to head the opposite way Betty just so happened to be going the other direction causing at least three collisions in the middle of the halls.

She was silently laughing so hard at the memory tears were streaming down her face.

“You okay Ronnie?” Archie said eyeing her watery eyes and reaching a hand out to wipe a stray tear.

“You’re crying!” Betty jumped up knocking jugheads arm right in his face , causing her to break into another fit of uncontrollable giggles.

“I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m just having….spacial issues.” At this she set off Cheryl and Kevin, they were now laughing equally as hard she was.

“Did I miss the joke?” Jughead said confused

Betty raised an eyebrow as the lunch bell went off “apparently I missed it too.”

Everyone stood to head back inside, feeling slightly high from there five minute long laugh fest

“You guys are so weird.” Betty huffed as she grabbed her bag.

Jughead just shook his head, nudging Betty over so he could walk beside her.

As the group walked to their final class of the day, one of the mathletes accidentally shoved Betty into jugheads arms

“Watch where you’re going! I’m sure solving derivatives can wait.” He snarled towards the tiny freshman.“you okay?” he asked, his arms still comfortably holding her from behind

She nodded, resting her head against his chest.

Veronica stared at the pair, looking around at her swooning friends, she had to get to the bottom of this.

“Okay what’s up with you two, it’s like you can’t be apart for more than three minutes and it’s like gravity keeps pushing you two into each other.” She said sassily

Jughead dropped his arms from her waist and Betty stepped away blushing.

“What are you talking about Ronnie?”

“Oh come on guys, everyone can see it except you two, you’re like destined to be close.” Cheryl answered giddily, she loved a good romance.

“Totally agree, like Romeo and Juliet.” Kevin nodded.

Archie laughed “its totally true, I haven’t seen one of you without the other in weeks.”

Jughead was smiling down at Betty now and she looked up at him with a curious smile

“Whaddaya say bets? We can’t let the universe down can we?” He smirked holding his arm out for her to take.

She laughed loudly, sliding her arm into his.

“You’re so right juggie, physics and all that.” Smiling and holding each other close the couple made their way down the hallway, leaving their friends to stare in shock

The silence was broken when Archie mutter d happily

“I ship it.”

Dentist Visit (grayson/reader)

requested by @stydiascreams

basically what the title says :-)

You sighed as Grayson once again began fidgeting, “Stop moving so much,” You hissed at the boy sat next to you.

He gripped your hand as he spoke, “I’m sorry, i’m just nervous! I’ve never been put to sleep for anything before.”

Grayson had dragged you to the dentist office with him for support as he got his wisdom teeth taken out and Ethan just tagged along to record his brother.

“You’re gonna be fine, man. And plus, hopefully we’ll get some good footage of loopy Grayson for the video.” Ethan smirked as his twins rolled his eyes.

The nurse called Gray in which meant you and Ethan were to wait an hour till he was done. For some reason you were nervous for him, you hoped he wasn’t too wild after like Ethan was. That was hilarious, crazy, but hilarious.

—•—•—•—•—

“Hey buddy…” Ethan chuckled as you two eyed the other twin who seemed oddly calm.

Grayson smiled back at you two before explaining that he took a nap and was feeling comfortable in the weird position he sat in.

A few calm moments passed before he started acting up. 

Hey! Look over there!” Grayson shouted as he pointed to the wall before throwing his blood soaked gauze at his twin.

“Dude, no!” Ethan cried as the cloth landed in front of him.

You tried to stifle your laughter as he glared at you, “Not funny.” He deadpanned. 

“Get me new ones.” Your boyfriend smirked at his brother who walked out to find a nurse, leaving you holding the camera.

You stared at your loopy boyfriend, admiring how even with puffed up cheeks and bloody lips he still looked like the cutest thing.

“Hey baby,” He grinned as the nurse came in to replace the gauze he previously threw at his brother.

You huffed as he leaned on you, this boy must’ve thought he weighed nothing.

“Gray, you gotta walk on your own more!” You whined as you shifted, trying not to fall over.

“I am!” He retorted, leaning on you even more.

Ethan laughed loudly as he filmed you two, claiming that it was much more entertaining to watch you struggle than to help.

“You’re sitting in the back with him.” Ethan declared as he slid into the drivers seat.

You rolled your eyes as Grayson ‘cannonballed’ into the car, severely missing the seat and landing on the floor.

With him buckled in and somewhat calm, Ethan started the drive to their house. Grayson insisted on having the radio full blast because he just wanted to ‘bump’.

“He’s not mad, that’s dissipointing.” Ethan pouted as Grayson rested his head against the window.

You chuckled, staring at your swollen boyfriend as he began to mumble under his breath.

“What’s that, Gray?” You questioned.

He sighed, “Why am I single?” Ethan gave you a look as his twin continued talking, “I guess there’s nobody that likes me..” He trailed off as he fiddled with his hands.

You frowned as you listened, “I’m your girlfriend baby and I like you. A lot.”

The grin on his face was almost comical, “What? You are?”

Ethan stifled his laughter as Grayson basically lunged at you, messily wrapping his arms around your shoulders.

Nodding, you giggled, “Yeah, for like a year now. How much did that medicine mess you up?”

“Do i get you pizza? And flowers?” He stared at you with big eyes as he spoke.

You hummed, “All the time, we had a pizza date the other day and you took me roses. My favorites.”

Grayson smirked, “I’m a good boyfriend, huh?”

“The best.” You declared before pecking his cheek.

That made him turn a light shade of pink which you thought was absolutely adorable.

“Okay, i love you,” He mumbled before laying his head on your shoulder, eyes closed.

You intertwined your hands before replying, “I love you too, baby.”

Ethan scrunched up his face as he drove, “Gross.”

the signs as matthew gray gubler tweets
  • aries: wanted to look sharp for my driver's license so i shaved with dad's razor but i didn't know i cut my face and now i look like i eat humans
  • taurus: sometimes i drink olive oil
  • gemini: when someone tries to start a pretentious conversation about some fancy novel i only make references to young adult fiction
  • cancer: tag me in your #wonks
  • leo: retweet if you just ate so much pizza alone in a dark kitchen
  • virgo: if you've never had a nervous breakdown you're either lacking passion or are maybe a monk
  • libra: be cool stay in school!
  • scorpio: looking forward to the day i'm finally eccentric enough to carry an umbrella in the sun
  • sagitarrius: the only sport i follow is eating cheese
  • capricorn: beware of snickerdoodle...
  • aquarius: driving to coachella but listening to the soundtrack from shrek
  • pisces: heyoooo it's saturday night, i'm in comfortable pants and about to eat 2 bags of sour skittles

theplushfrog  asked:

My old campus was a catholic university with its own monastery. The monks taught theology classes mainly, but also took care of the grounds, as the campus had some ridiculously huge, building-sized trees. But the real strange part was how the wildlife behaved. One expects wildlife to be nervous around college kids, but they were oddly calm and docile. Squirrels would walk, finches landed on a branch right in your face, hawks chilled beside you on fence posts. They didn't care at all. 1/2

It’s really something else to see wildlife so completely unafraid of humans, even humans in the age range most likely to fuck with them. But, honestly? I never knew anyone who fucked with the wildlife beyond handfeeding squirrels or selfies with the hawks. It was like we all knew something would happen if we took advantage of their trust. Often we whispered that the monks had them under a spell, but now I wonder if the monks had an agreement with local fae. Those trees were huge after all. 2/2