did they fall off

u kno that moment when u give up and u just feel this immsense wave of relief wash over u? that shit is dangerously addictive

Fran and Jock

by reddit user Pippinacious/ tumblr user muricanmagpie

I was the last in a long line of grandkids on both sides of the family. No one has ever said as much, but I’m pretty sure I was an “oops” baby; the result of one too many glasses of wine and a couple over forty who thought unplanned pregnancies were for teens.

Oops.

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Twelve.

Could you write like the smuttiest thing you’ve ever written please!!

I kinda want to blame this request for this sin but oh well… This is pure filth so please don’t read it if you aren’t comfortable with smut. This has not been proofread so I’m sorry for any mistakes.xxx

Y/N couldn’t believe how stupid she was when she agreed to this. She regretted it the moment she said yes. Now it’s been almost two weeks. Twelve days. 288 hours. Not that she was counting.
It happened during a night in with Harry. They both had a bit too much of red wine, their lips stained and their words getting slurred and silly.

“I bet you couldn’t go a week without sex.”
She looked at him with wide eyes for a moment, her deep red lips parted.
“What? I can totally go without sex. Unlike you, you’re a horny mess after an hour without sex.” she smirked at him.
“S'not true! I bet I can go longer without sex than you.” he stated proudly.
“A bet? You wanna bet, Styles?”
“Yes. We’ll see who can go longer without sex.”
“And what does the winner get?”
“Mind blowing sex.”


Exactly that was what she was craving for right now, mind blowing sex. It wasn’t that she was addicted to sex or needed it to function but when your boyfriend is Harry Styles and looks like a goddamn adonis and you know exactly what he’s able to do with his perfect body it’s hard not to get horny.
He was teasing her as well, every morning his hand would wander a bit too low when they were cuddling and every time he came out of the shower his towel was almost falling off and sometimes it really did fall off, accidentally of course.
She was teasing him as well though, only sleeping in one of his shirts and a pair of lace panties or wearing her favorite pair of jeans which she knew made her ass look extremely good.
It didn’t help her though, he noticed all her teasing and sexy looks but he never made a move on her. He wanted to win this bet.
She wanted to as well but if she was quite honest she didn’t think she was able to go another hour without his naked body pressed to hers.
She knew he was upstairs right now, in their ensuite bathroom, taking a shower. And she knew he would come down in a few minutes, showing off his irresistible body.
She couldn’t take it anymore, her body was going crazy. The constant ache between her legs made her feel dizzy and the fact that she just needed him made her go upstairs.
She entered their bedroom, smelling his shower gel. She wanted him. She needed him. She didn’t care about the bet anymore, it’s been too long.
He came out of the door a minute later, surprised to see her standing in the middle of their bedroom, looking all nervous and messy.
“You okay, love? You look a bit flustered.”
She shook her head, she was almost near tears now. The desperation and frustration grew inside of her, making her body move over to his and pressing her lips to his in a hard kiss.
She felt his shock, before he finally began to kiss her back and wrap his arms around her.
“What’s going on, hm?”
He knew exactly what was going on, she was needy. But he wanted to hear her say it.
“Want you. I-I need you. Harry, please, I can’t-”
“Shh, baby.” he shushed her rambling gently.
“What so you need, hm?”
“You, please.”
“What do you need from me?”
“Harry!” she exclaimed frustrated.
“I need to hear you say it, baby. C'mon tell me.”
“I want you to fuck me.” she whimpered.
He smirked at her, satisfied with her answer.
“But then you’ll loose the bet, darling.”
“I don’t care about this fucking bet, Harry! This was such as stupid idea. I just want you to fuck me, take me in every way you like.”
“So desperate? S'not even been two weeks, my love.”
“But it’s been too long.”
“Alright, s'true. Get out of these clothes, baby.”
She did as he said, immediately throwing her shirt to the floor and stepping out of her jeans and panties.
“Good girl. Now lie down on the bed for me.”
She lied down on her back, waiting for him to come to her. She heard his towel hitting the floor, falling beside her clothes. She looked up at him as he started to crawl onto the bed until he was hovering over her naked form but not touching her yet.
“Didn’t think you could go this long without having me fuck you, baby.” he whispered against her neck, his lips brushing over her skin and making goosebumps arise on her whole body.
“Didn’t think I could go so long without fucking you.”
He pressed the first kiss against her sweet spot, right under her ear and her bach arched off the back, pressing her chest against his. She heard him groan quietly when her naked tits touched his chest.
“I missed this so fucking much, baby. Never again, yeah?”
“Never.” she agreed.
His kisses wandered lower, over her collarbones down to her boobs. He nibbled on the skin there, using his tongue to lick over it. When he reached her nipples he sucked on each of them, licking over the pink flesh before he released it and wandered lower.
He took his time with kissing ever inch of her but this wasn’t what she wanted. She didn’t want him to be gentle and loving. She wanted him to be rough. Really rough.
“Harry, please.”
He knew that tone, the desperation and need in it. He knew he was torturing her right now but he won’t keep going like this. He’s going to give her what she wants.
He came up from where he was kissing around her hips, looking her in the eyes. He leaned down to press a kiss against her lips, covering her mouth in a sweet and passionate way.
“You went twelve days without this, right? Twelve is a nice number.”
His face moved to the side, his nose nuzzling into her hair and his mouth right over her ear.
“How about I make you come twelve times? A orgasm for every single day you didn’t have me.”
She whimpered at his words, wanting that. Wanting him to make her come undone as many times as possible.
“How’s that sound?”
“Please, Harry.”
“Yes? You want that?”
“Yes.”
“Gonna count them, okay? Gonna count every time you come for me, yeah?”
“Yes, Harry.” she nodded frankly.
He moved down her body again, until he was right between her legs. He grabbed her knees, making them bend and her feet plant on the mattress. He started to kiss down her left thigh, moving closer to where she was pink and aching for him.
She spread her lips apart when he decided it was enough of the teasing, groaning when he saw how wet she was. He glided his middle finger between her lips, gathering some of her juices and rubbing over her clit with them. A breathy moan left her lips at the contact, missing his touch too much.
He finally leaned down then, licking a broad stripe between her pussy lips and humming at the taste of her. He loved this when she filled all his senses, he was only able to see her, smell her, taste her and feel her.
He licked over her clit, lapping at it with the tip of his tongue. He circled the nub before he licked over it from side to side and then moved down to her entrance where he pushed his tongue inside and moved it up and down against her walls. She was moaning and groaning, her hands in Harry’s hair, pulling it and messing it up.
He hooked her thighs over his shoulders so he had better access to her and could bury his face deeper into her. His hands were sprawled out on her hips, holding them down so she couldn’t squirm away.
He licked her deeper now, right between her lips and massaging all the right places. He could feel her getting close already, her thighs beginning to shake, her pussy beginning to clench and the juices kept pouring out of her.
“Harry, I-I’m gonna-” a loud moan interrupted her words when he licked over just the perfect spot.
He sucked on her clit then, trapping it between his lips and massaging it with his tongue at the same time. She came within seconds, screaming out into the bedroom and pulling Harry closer by his hair. He groaned against her when he felt her come, loving the way she moved her pussy against his face and her cum dripped out of her. He knew she came hard, her voice breaking with every moan and her body shaking and trembling with the waves of pleasure that cursed through her whole body and made everything clench.
When her thighs finally fell open and Harry was sure he got every drop of her he sat up, breathing harshly. His lips were swollen and wet with her and his eyes dark and wild.
“You forgot something, my love.” he reminded her.
She wasn’t able to think properly, her brain probably jelly just like her bones. She remembered what he requested of her earlier though.
“One.”
“Good girl.” he praised her.
He moved up again, kissing her briefly.
“Sit up.”
She did as he said, sitting up and watching how he lay down on the bed.
“Over my face, darling.”
“What? Harry, no.”
He knew she didn’t like this too much. It felt amazing and she knew that but she hated the thought of sitting on his face. She was always scared of hurting him.
“Baby, c'mon. You know how good it’s gonna feel.”
She looked at him skeptical for a second before she sighed and gave in. She moved so she was straddling his face. He pulled her down immediately, making her sit right on his mouth. She moaned immediately when she felt his tongue on her again, dragging up the full crease of her.
“Yes! Oh fuck.” she moaned out and she knew Harry was smirking against her.
He moved one hand from where he was holding onto her thigh to her mouth, silently telling her to suck his fingers and get them wet. She wrapped her lips around them, getting them dripping wet. When he was happy with her sucking he moved them down to her entrance, immediately pushing two fingers inside of her, causing her to moan at the delicious stretch.
Harry started pumping his fingers inside of her, stroking that one spot she could never reach herself.
Y/N’s hands reached up to hold onto the headboard, moving her hips against Harry’s mouth. He moaned against her when he felt her starting to ride his mouth, letting her move just how she pleased.
He resettles her above him after a moment and then she feels the firm press of his hot tongue against her clit, licking it with just the perfect pressure.
Harry fucks into her with his fingers, twisting and curling them. His lips sucked her clit into his mouth, flicking over it and making sharp pleasure run up her spine.
“Y-Yes, oh shit.”
She was already so close again, almost overwhelmed with all the pleasure he made her feel.
Harry curled his fingers inside of her, pressing hard against her g-spot. She’s clenching down around his fingers, so close to coming. He hummed against her, the vibrations hitting her clit immediately and that was all it took for her to explode again.
“Harry, yes!”
Harry’s fingers fucked her through it, prolonging her orgasm and keeping her right there. His lips kept on sucking on her clit, making her come so hard she fell forward against the headboard. Harry held onto her ass cheeks then, moving her against his mouth in the same way he would do it if she was sitting on his cock.
“Harry, oh fuck!”
He kept on moving her against him with his hands on her ass cheeks, licking her so deep she came for the third time with a shaky cry and clenching thighs.
She whines when it gets too much and Harry lets go of her, helping her off him.
“What was that, my love?”
“Three.”
Y/N was shaking, a whimpering mess but Harry knew she wanted to keep going. Needed to keep going.
Harry needed this himself, he missed this over the last two weeks. His dick was standing to his full potential already, his tip a angry shade of red and leaking precum that made it look slick.
“Can you sit on my cock, baby?” he asked her sweetly, innocence lacing his words.
She nodded the tiniest bit, moving so she was straddling his hips. She eyed his dick hungrily, missing that body part the most. She took hold of his shaft, enjoying the fact that Harry groaned out at the feel of her hand around him.
She lined herself up with his tip, sinking down immediately. Loud groans left both of their mouths, their eyes falling shut with the pleasure that came with having each other like this again.
Y/N took him as deep as possible, sitting properly on his dick with her ass hitting his thighs. She began to rock her hips, making him rub against her favorite spot. Harry was looking up at her, not quite sure if he should look at her blissed out face or the place where his dick was sliding into her pussy.
Her hands were on his butterfly tattoo, bracing herself. She bounced on him then, making his dick fill her up with every movement of her hips.
“Yes, fuck yourself on my cock.” Harry groaned out, moving his hands to her thighs.
Y/N was moaning and whimpering above him, slamming down so hard on his cock that her ass created a filthy sound against his thighs.
One of her hands wandered to in between her legs, rubbing at her clit to get herself there faster. Harry felt his eyes rolling back in his head when he saw her touching herself right on his dick, the sight so overwhelmingly sexy that he was sure he could come right then and there.
He felt it when she was close, her walls squeezing his dick and her hips moving even faster. She kept on rubbing herself until she finally came with a hoarse shout, her whole body shaking with the pure pleasure her own fingers and his cock made her experience. She came hard, Harry could feel her slick coating his cock and dripping onto his thighs. Her pussy was squeezing Harry’s dick so hard he saw stars but he wouldn’t come, not until he got everything from her.
“Four.” she moaned out when she finally stopped the movements of her hips, her fingers still stroking over her clit to ride out her orgasm properly.
Harry sat up when she wanted to let him slid out of her, pulling her by her thighs tightly to him so she was still sitting on his cock. A surprised shriek left her at his movements, her eyes wide and her mouth parted.
He slapped her fingers away from her pussy, replacing them with his own and rubbing her bundle of nerves in hard circles. A high pitched moan left her, trying to squirm away from his fingers.
“Harry, fuck I-”
“I want you to come, right on my cock from only my fingers.”
She groaned disbelievingly, she felt his cock so deep inside of her, she just wanted to move and make him fuck up inside of her but he held her down on his dick, not letting her move the slightest bit.
His fingers were rubbing her clit so roughly but just the way she liked it and she came within seconds, still worked up from her last orgasms.
Her pussy clenched down on Harry’s cock, making him groan out but he kept still, only feeling her orgasm on him. He rubbed her through it, the way her pussy squeezed his cock making him moan right with her.
“Five.”
He removed his fingers from her, wrapping his arms around her waist and lying down with her on top of him, his dick still inside of her. He knew she would be sore the next day but it didn’t matter.
He bent his knees, planting his feet on the mattress. Her thighs were spread, her knees on either side of his hips. He gave her one experimental thrust, loving the way she moaned out loud at the pleasure.
He unwrapped his arms from around her, his hands grabbing onto her ass, spreading her cheeks apart before he fucked up into her. He held her down on his cock so she couldn’t move, his dick slamming into her hard and fast. She was screaming against his shoulder, his dick feeling so fucking good inside of her. Harry was moaning into her neck, this position absolutely wrecking him as well.
Y/N came so fast it was incredible, screaming and sobbing loudly against Harry, her nails leaving scratches on his arm. He slowed down a bit when she kept on crying out against his shoulder, now rolling his hips into her rather than thrusting with full force.
“S-Six.” she stammered out when she was able to think again.
“Such a good girl, baby. You still good?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
He pounded her pussy again, his thighs slapping against her ass hard. He slapped down on her ass with both hands at that was all she needed before she came again. She wasn’t able to count her seventh orgasm because it became her eighth right afterwards, growing into one mind blowing orgasm that made her shout out.
“Yes, baby.” Harry breathed out when her pussy got incredibly tight again.
“Eight.”
He made her sit up then, letting him slip out of her.
“Hands and knees, love.”
It took her a bit longer than usual to position herself due to the shaking of her limbs but she managed to within a few moments.
He lined himself up behind her, sliding into her immediately. He wrapped his arms around her, pressing her back to his chest. He spread her thighs a bit wider so he had more access before he began to fuck her again, her ass hitting his thighs loudly with every move.
She came again within seconds, her pussy now so sensitive that it only needed a few thrusts to explode. Harry moved one hand to her clit before she could finish completely, intensifying her orgasm with his hard circles against her nerves and making her groan out.
He fucked her right through it, not letting up on his pace and his rubbing.
“Harry! Oh!”
Another orgasm rocked through her body, making her fall forwards. Harry let her, leaning over her and still rubbing her clit with his fingers.
“T-Ten.”
He removed his hand from her, pressing her down on the bed completely and slamming into her so hard the whole bed moved and the headboard kept on hitting the wall with loud thuds.
He didn’t even feel her next orgasm, her pussy grew so tight around him that he wasn’t able to feel her clenching anymore. But she did come, he could hear it, her loud moans and shouts.
“Eleven.” she whimpered out.
She was completely fucked out, he knew she was but she had one more inside of her. Only one more.
Harry was right there, at the edge of his orgasm and he knew he only needed a few more seconds before he would come inside of her. Y/N was still lying on her stomach, her hands gripping onto the sheets.
“You gonna come with me, baby?”
She only moaned at that was all he needed before he began to pound away, paying attention to that one spot inside of her that would make her explode within seconds.
And she did come within a few short moments, coming harder than ever around him. Her juices came pouring out of her, drenching the sheets underneath them. Her scream was so loud it teared right through Harry, making him come deep inside of her and coating her walls with his hot release. He stilled inside of her, pushing as deep as he could go, his cock still releasing rope after rope of sticky white cum.
He was scared that she passed out for a moment but her moans and whimpers reassured him that she was still conscious. He pulled out of her finally, hearing her whimper at the loss. He looked down and saw her release mixed with his cum pouring out of her, onto the sheets.
He lied down beside her, his breathing harsh and ragged.
“You okay, my love?” he asked her softly, his hand stroking over her back.
She looked at him with half lidded eyes, her lips parted.
“How the fuck did you make me come twelve times?”
Her voice was wrecked, raspy from all the shouting she’d done.
Harry laughed out at her words, his shoulders shrugging.
“I’ve got no idea. But it was hot as fuck.”
She turned around finally, laying her head on his chest with a sigh.
“We are never ever going without sex again. Never.” she stated.
“Never.” he agreed.
“We need to change the sheets.” she whispered after a few moments, a bit of embarrassment audible in her voice.
“That we have to do, love. Never thought you could come like this. My dick really has to be amazing.”
She hit his chest playfully, scolding him with her eyes.
“Shut up, you wanker.”
“Oi! I’m very glad that I don’t have to wank anymore, thank you very much.”
“Oh god, Harry.”

So, I saw Dear Evan Hansen, and I think I must inform all of you about somethings (part three):

• In Disappear, Connor’s ghost gets realll close to Evan and sounds desperate for Evan’s help.
• Alana, somewhere in there, sings her own tiny reprise of Waving Through A Window and it’s beautiful.
• In You Will Be Found, it shows Connor’s baby pictures and pictures of Connor before he grew out his hair. Turns out, it’s ALL of Mike Faist’s actual pictures. Some of them are recognizably from when he did Newsies!
• Zoe, before To Break In A Glove, warns Evan about the incoming Dad Talk that Larry is gonna give Evan. To which Larry responds, “women, right?” and no one in the theater looked happy with that comment.
• Evan’s voice cracks a LOT during the show and he looks down a lot too.
• Ben Platt does this really cute thing where he lifts his leg, squeezes his fingers together, and closes his eyes when he hits a high note.
• Only Us is in Evan’s room.
• Evan wears ONLY blue the whole show, but he wears tons of different shirts.
• Everyone changes clothes a LOT. Especially Jared. And Zoe is Very Fashionable.
• In Good For You, Jared and Alana stay close as if to protect each other, like Evan is some kind of monster.
• Before Words Fail, Connor’s ghost goes, “listen, you can get rid of me whenever you want, but do you think you’re suddenly going to go out there and tell everyone the truth? You can’t even tell yourself the truth. How did you break your arm, Evan?” Evan doesn’t respond. “How did you break your…” Evan cuts him off and goes, “I fell out of a tree! I slipped off!” To which Connor says, “Did you fall? Or did you let go.”
• After that, there’s a *deafening* silence, then a shattering lightbulb sound and Evan runs away.

(100 years later I finally got to your prompt, mac-noa ! I wasn’t explicitly lovey dovey bc I didn’t want to be ooc and it’s only actually from Matt’s POV, but I hope it works for you!!!)

Matt and Dan walk in late, strung together by the hands, still flushed from kissing in the car pre-practice. They go sheepish when they see the unimpressed look on Wymack’s face. Renee smiles brightly at them and Allison gives them a brisk nod, but the monsters are in more disarray than usual. Bits and pieces of their group are missing, and it leaves Matt with the peculiar feeling of looking at a familiar photograph that suddenly has the faces scratched out.

Their ringleader is absent, for starters, couch conspicuously empty beside Kevin — who looks unmoved and stoic and nauseated as usual.

It’s not unusual for Andrew to do things just because it’s inconvenient for others, but it’s a little weird for Neil to skip out as well. It’s a lot weird that he’s late at the same time as Andrew when Exy hangs in the balance. 

Any association between them feels like something Matt has to fix, like he set something bad in motion by meeting Neil later than Andrew did in the fall. They’re probably off having one of their weird, close, angry looking conversations that always end in agreements Matt doesn’t understand.

Wymack waits thirty seconds past Matt and Dan’s arrival, and then he looks at the couch like it’s causing him pain, and starts delegating tasks for the day. He only asks once where the missing links are and there’s a lot of shrugging and staring straight ahead before he gives up.

They’re less rowdy than usual, and Matt thinks they’re all individually trying to solve Neil and Andrew’s absence in their heads. (As soon as they get up to move to the court, Allison starts whispering numbers for their betting pool until Dan bats her away.)

Matt squeezes Dan’s hand until she looks at him, and they have a brief conversation in smothered smiles.

They split up to change, and Matt straps into his gear feeling vaguely ill at ease. He keeps glancing at the door between straps and tugs of his uniform, and he notices Nicky doing the same thing. He smiles awkwardly when Matt catches him, and Matt feels a rare pulse of kinship for him. Both Andrew’s lot and the upperclassmen seem equally confused, so they have something in common for once.

The strange feeling follows Matt all the way to the court and through the first set of drills before Neil finally shows up, looking harried and flushed and all sorts of things Matt doesn’t usually associate with Neil.

He pushes into the court straight past Wymack’s blustering reprimand, and Matt catches the tail end of a flippant apology before Neil’s sprinting to centre court.

Matt stares at him. Neil waits, twisting his racquet in his hand, shoulders tense like he expects someone to toss him into the gameplay by force.

“What?” Neil asks, annoyed.

“You’re late,” Matt says stupidly.

“Twenty minutes late,” Kevin interrupts. “Almost like you’re trying to get worse.”

“He was with me,” Andrew says suddenly, breezing past them towards goal looking impossible to have spent twenty straight minutes with. Neil sort of jolts at the sound of his voice, and Matt eyes him narrowly.

Keep reading

Writing Prompts

• I wanted to completely disappear.
• You went so far down the rabbit hole.
• Well, there are the monsters.
• What do we want to focus on?
• What happened at the time?
• There was no contact between them.
• You may recognize the name.
• It’s tiny, isn’t it?
• What are you working on?
• Are you blowing things up?
• Are we in trouble?
• Can I come in?
• Would you lend it to me?
• Is it a secret?
• What are you testing?
• It’s very rare.
• Who tracks these things?
• What’s making that sound?
• It happens every day.
• It’s too cold in here.
• What do the reports say?
• Is it a good theory?
• I want to tell you about my life.
• Can we get married tonight?
• It’s a good enough explanation.
• What are we hearing?
• That’s a little atypical.
• We are very slow.
• It was just a bright spot.
• What can cause suck explosions?
• Stop giggling!
• Is it hilarious enough?
• I have the best idea.
• Look, bubbles!
• Where did you hear that?
• Can you solve it?
• It’s just math.
• Where have you been to?
• Are you throwing rocks?
• He can’t stop talking.
• I love your left eye.
• I’m hearing what you’re saying.
• Maybe I could just change my name.
• One day I’ll run out of possibilities.
• Does that ever happen?
• Where do I place it?
• Help me disappear.
• We saw none of that.
• Did it fall off?
• Who was there to light it?
• Let’s have fun.
• Is it too random?
• I want to punch it.
• You are very specific.
• That’s the answer.
• Do you remember the number?
• I came for you now.
• Just say no.
• It’s a good mix.
• Cuddles are good.
• That’s exactly the problem.
• Is it a serious situation?
• It can be very loud.
• Where are the sources?
• Why would they lie about it?
• Can someone tell me?
• You can email me.
• Do you want to watch it?
• It’s a storm.
• What a waste of my time.

today was my high school graduation yaayy…

anyway I’d like to personally thank you people who have wished good luck and congratulations and also have a shout out to those people who have been stuck with me since I started 4th year and have been dealing with my school related rants for the past year

also my cap did fall off during the march and I was the freaking one in front of my section

anonymous asked:

Dude, requests are back up, awesome! How about DAI companions + Krem de la creme reacting to the inquisitor being one of the last avian folk?(Like, they have big ass wings, so they always wear an even bigger cloak to hide them, and during battle somehow, they end up losing the cloak? They can legit fly with them)

Cassandra: She stares and stares before angrily demanding to know why they hid this from her. They sheepishly explain their situation, and she calms down, but it doesn’t change the fact they hid it. When she eventually gets over it, she sometimes just sits and watches them fly around (which they do for fun; they’re actually sort of relieved to be revealed for this reason). It makes her nervous, at first, worrying they’ll suddenly drop, but she’s awed by how agile and graceful they are in the sky. Once or twice, they have to pick her up and drop her somewhere else, and it makes her nervous every time they pick her up, and she hates how helpless she feels suspended in the air. If Romanced: Sometimes he takes her flying for no reason other than a good time. She likes it significantly more than non-romanced flying. Eventually, they’ll land, and have a quiet, serene place to sit together while she listens to him recite poetry.

Blackwall: He stares. That’s all he can do as he gawks with a slack jaw for a long time. He has no words– trying for speech just results in helpless sputtering. The man stands aside as the others fuss and try to make sense of the situation, and speaks last. He gets over it, though, once he hears the story, and doesn’t mind at all. “They’re like a pair of griffon wings,” he admires, “powerful and fast.” If the Herald can lift him up, it makes him supremely uncomfortable the first time they take him into the sky, but he finds that he thinks it’s fun. If Romanced: He regularly compliments her on how beautiful her wings are, and he tries to help itch and clean the spots she can’t reach easily. He brings her flowers that grow all the way up on a mountainside, and she gently teases him and says she could just fly him up there. “No, my lady,” he refuses, “it’s not the same if all the work’s taken out of it. You shouldn’t waste your time helping me get you flowers; let me do the work.”

Iron Bull: After getting past the initial shock, he’s utterly green with envy. It looks like SO MUCH FUN, taking off like a dragon to the skies. The Herald tries to pick him up (to no avail, he’s too heavy) to give him the experience of flying, so he takes it upon himself to make them stronger and faster, so they can. Push-ups with wings, laps around Skyhold, timing their speed of flight, you name it. “Just wait. You’ll go back to your people and fly circles around them! When you can finally lift me up, you can air-drop me on the enemies for an attack from above! It’s gonna be great!” If romanced: Hot. He’s 100% into this. He snickers if any feathers get ruffled or fall off after sex. “Did I ruffle your feathers, Kadan?” he teases, and he just laughs as they slap him with a wing. He ties one of the feathers that fall off to the dragontooth necklace, as long as they don’t mind.

Sera: She’s freaked out and utterly shocked. She has no idea how to react, so she just stares for a long time, sputtering helplessly. She feels bad later at how upset they seemed at her facial expression. “Aw, shite… well, your feathery ass is welcome here, alright?” she reassures. She likes tossing things at them when they’re flying to see if they can catch it, and it becomes a sort of game/exercise routine. She also talks them into using their wings to prank others. She screams the first time they pick her up and take her into the sky, but soon she realizes she likes it, so long as she trusts the Herald. Sometimes she’ll ask to be taken with them, because she thinks it’s exhilarating– and a few times, shoots arrows at people from above while the Herald carries her. “Death from above! Arrows from the sky! I even have a source of feathers for fletching at any moment! Hah!” A few times, if she needs them, she’ll just pluck a feather clean off if there’s none lying around, and sticks her tongue out as the Herald protests. “What? You still got a lot of ‘em. Your wings are huge!” Also jokingly refers to wings/feathers sticking out as “wingboners.” If Romanced: She likes tickling her wings and playing with her feathers, and sleeping under a wing when they’re in bed together. “They’re soft. And fuzzy. And cute.” she gushes. She also learns how to preen the feathers, and takes to doing so regularly out of affection, at least in the areas her girlfriend can’t reach with ease. She typically finishes it off by taking a feather or two that falls off to keep for herself.

Varric: “Holy Mother of Andraste’s ass.” he breathes, taking it all in. He comes around quickly, though, and asks a lot of questions– though few on anatomy, unlike Dorian, and more on who they are, where they come from, and about their people. He’s fascinated, and taking notes. Sometimes when he’s out of writing quills, he wryly asks them if he can take one of theirs– or may just take one if they drop off from time-to-time. He’s not a fan of going into the sky, at all. “You know, I like the idea of getting as far away from the Stone as possible,” he says nervously as he looks down at the world below, “but this is a bit too far. Dwarves don’t fly.”

Cole: He knew, and he doesn’t mind in the least. “I am sorry. The others know, and they want to help. They don’t mind the wings.” He also comments that the others are happy while watching the Herald fly, and the Inquisitor takes to doing small shows on a regular basis for the crowd at Skyhold, which always draws large numbers. Everyone is cheered by the amazing sight of them in the sky, and morale goes up. People start sitting and waiting for hours before the show starts. Cole smiles– they helped.

Dorian: About five million questions start flying from his lips as soon as he’s out of the initial shock. How fast can you fly? How many feathers do you have? What’s the bone structure of your wings? Can you stick one straight out so I can measure how long it is? Where are your people from? Why are you the only one out here? It makes them more than a little uncomfortable, and he feels bad when he realizes how uncomfortable they are. “Oh.” he says, suddenly quiet. “I… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… if you need to talk, let me know?” He loves watching them soar through the sky, and he takes notes as he watches. He considers them and their wings utterly beautiful, and he feels honored to know them and witness their flight. He does not particularly care for going in the air, though, citing a sudden fear of extreme heights as he clings to the Herald, trying desperately to not look down. If Romanced: He loves preening his lover’s feathers, because it’s hard for them to reach behind and get them clean. He finishes it all with a kiss. He feels so safe under his boyfriend’s wings as they lay together, and he silently smirks as he imagines his father’s reaction to seeing his boyfriend.

Vivienne: She has to work to hide her complete and utter shock, and briefly scolds the Herald for not telling her before. When they’re comfortable, she examines their wings in detail. She figures out a grooming regimen. “Darling, everyone knows what you are now– there’s no point in hiding your wings any longer.” She smiles. “So use them. Preen them. Take the time and effort to make them presentable. You will be imposing, awe-inspiring, beautiful, majestic, and everyone will know it with a single glance.” She introduces them to her tailor, who manages to make them outfits that accommodate the wings– even accentuate them. Vivienne does not like being taken into the sky, but tolerates it if necessary in combat.

Solas: Their people were known to the ancient Elvhen, but their numbers were in slow decline– he’s honestly surprised that there’s any still around at all. He’s sympathetic to them, and surprises them by being the least shocked of any of the party members. He claims that he has seen their people before in the Fade, and suddenly the other party members are coming to him, asking for information. When he shakes them off, he mentions to the Herald that they shouldn’t hide their wings, for they are beautiful and proof of their ancient people. He asks them a lot of questions about the current state of their race, about their society, which befuddles the Herald. He doesn’t seem to mind being lifted into the air, if need be, and may even ask the Herald to carry him to places inaccessible by walking alone. If Romanced: They spend dates just finding places that only winged creatures can reach, and they look over the world together. They slumber and see memories previous unexplored by the remote location, and Solas feels genuine happiness that someone can understand the value of unexplored dreams. “Thank you, ma vhenan. Thank you…”

Cullen: He just sighs. Somehow this doesn’t even shock him. Maybe he’s seen too much. He’s a bit frustrated that they didn’t tell him to begin with, but lets it go readily. He asks if they know any others of their kind who would be interested in joining the Inquisition– flying soldiers would be excellent– and finds himself bewildered as they tell him that the vast majority of their people are shy and mistrustful of land-dwellers. He apologizes, and does not press the matter further. He enjoys watching them fly, and compliments them on their ability, but absolutely hates being taken off the ground and into the sky in any circumstances. If Romanced: He’s somewhat more tolerant of being taken into the sky, but he still doesn’t like it. Sometimes when he’s having bad dreams, he awakens as one of her wings gently folds over him, covering him softly, affectionately, and his heart rate slows. He’s safe, and she loves him, and he feels it. He goes back to sleep in peace, happy with what he has and who he loves.

Leliana: She’s just envious, if anything; she wouldn’t mind being able to fly. She was wondering what they were hiding, and found several stray feathers (which may or may not be in unusual colors) from time-to-time, and this explains it. She takes it pretty calmly, and asks if they know any others of their kind that might be willing to join as agents, or even airborne couriers. If the Herald ever takes her into the sky, she acts totally calm, but she LOVES it, even though she doesn’t say so.

Josephine: She’s at a loss. She tries to quickly compose herself and awkwardly make sense of the situation, but once the shock wears off, she’s endlessly curious about being able to fly. She watches them zip through the sky with grace and speed and is utterly mesmerized. Like Vivienne, she encourages a strict preening regimen– if they’re going to have wings, they might as well make them presentable. Eventually, the Herald offers to take her flying, and she squeals with a mix of delight and a bit of fright. Her hair blows loosely, and the wind’s on her face, and by the time the Herald brings her back down, she’s dazed and eager for the next time they fly together. If Romanced: They take her flying with them all the time, and it makes for interesting dates. She giggles and squeals (and on one occasion, screams as they do a loop with her in their arms) and has the time of her life. They always end it by landing somewhere picturesque, and they sit together, cuddling and admiring the world around them.

Krem: “Your… your Worship?” he asks, shocked, not sure if he’s seeing correctly, or if Bull’s pulling a prank like that time they all covered themselves with feathers– but no, it’s really them. If they don’t mind, he asks them questions about flying, and remarks that the Chargers would love having one of their kind on the team, if they know anyone looking for work. Sometimes he tosses his stuffed winged nug plushies at them from the ground, and they catch, not unlike the game played with Sera. He really likes flying, and admires the view of the world below.

Another 100 Random RP Starters

- does include some swearing; feel free to edit when sending in an ask to fit character’s speech

  • “No. No, no, no. Don’t you dare try to pin the blame on me.”
  • “Did you even bother to think about the consequences?”
  • “Listen here you useless paperclip!”
  • “Meerkats are murderous little bastards.”
  • “For the record, I hate everything.”
  • “Do you even remember me?”
  • “Did you know the guy who wrote Sherlock Holmes may have killed a man?”
  • “I’m going to join NASA and fling myself into the sun.”
  • “I hope you know what you’re getting into.”
  • “Please don’t. Just… don’t.”

Keep reading

OctaVIA BLAKE IS A MOTHERTRUCKING LEGEND SHE FUCKING DID IT AGAIN FIRST GETTING IMPLAED AMD FALLING OFF A CLIFF NOW SHE MANAGED TO OUTSMART NOT ONLY LUNA BUT ALL THE OTHER WARRIORS THOSE WARRIORS HAVING BEEN TRAINING FOR DECADES BUT THIS LEGEND WHO STAYED HALF HER LIFE IN A BUNKER MANAGED TO SURVIVE ALL OF THEM IM SO PROUD OF THIS GIRL SHES THAT BITCH SHE DID THAT CAN YOU BELIVE IT ROAN? LUNA? ILLIAN? THAT BIG BITCH WITH THE HAMMER? ALL OF THEM DEAD OCTVIA MOTHERFUCKING BLAKE SNATCHED EVERYONES WIG CALL HER OCTAGON CALL OCTABUSE SHE SUFFERED FROM MENTAL DEPRESSION AND PTSD FOR MONTHS AND SHE FINALLY MANAGED TO OVERCOME HER INNER WARS AND DEFEAT THEM ALL SHE DID HER CLAN SO PROUD DID YOU SEE INRDA AND KANE???? THEIR FACES WERE SCREAMING “THATS MY DAUGHTER YOU FUCKERS” AND THIS BITCH CLARKE THINKIN OCTAVIAS GONNA DIE INKNAJNQZJBSJQ I CANT WAIT TO THE REAL BLAKE SIBLING REUNION BELLAMY GONNA BE SO PROUND OF O IM SCREAMING YALL FANDOM LOSING THEIR SHIT OVER BELLARKE UM WE ALL KNOW WHO THE REAL STAR OF THE SHOW IS NO TEA JUST FACTS

Real Things that I've Said to my Service Dog in the Past 72 Hours

Are you peeing on my leg? Yes. You just peed on my leg.

You don’t get a treat if you took it away from me and then brought it back. That’s not how this works.

Why are you sitting like that?

Please don’t lick my nostrils.

“Leave it” includes flies.

Good. I’m glad the fly gave you hiccups.

You do not need your own pillow.

Did you just fall off the bed?

Me talking about you does not mean that I was talking to you.

You cannot eat things off the ground just because you are “off duty”.

*I set something down*
Do not pick that up.
*Bucky brings it to me anyway*

I am blowing my nose not crying but thank you for the comfort anyway.

That went really well aside from you farting very loudly when the cashier complimented you.

I asked for your leash not shampoo but good effort.

anonymous asked:

Heey if you have time could you write a joke to every house that wizards from that house would typically tell? xoxo

Gryffindor 1: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Gryffindor 2: I don’t know, why?

Gryffindor 1: To get to the idiot’s house.

Gryffindor 2: I don’t get it.

Gryffindor 1: Knock knock.

Gryffindor 2: Who’s there?

Gryffindor 1:The chicken

Gryffindor 2: LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT


Hufflepuff 1: What kind of shorts do clouds wear?

Hufflepuff 2: I don’t know

Hufflepuff 1: Thunderwear!

*all Hufflepuffs start laughing and high-fiving Hufflepuff 1*


Ravenclaw 1: Two atoms walk into a bar and asks for a firewhiskey. They ask how much, and the bartender says;

Entire Ravenclaw common room; FOR YOU, NO CHARGE


Slytherin 1: Why did Rosie fall off the swing? 

Slytherin 2: I don’t know why?

Slytherin 1: Because she had no arms.

Slytherin 2: *Trying to hold back laughter*

Slytherin 1: Knock Knock

Slytherin 2: *On the verge of bursting into laughter* …Who’s there?

Slytherin 1: Not Rosie

All Slytherins within hearing distance: *lose it with laughter*

*Faint sound of a Hufflepuff crying*