A Way to You Again: Part 6
Pairings: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: Language, Drinking, Angst
Word Count: 2153
Summary: Bucky and Y/N have been fairly successful at keeping their relationship hidden from the rest of the Avengers. That is… until Nat walks into the kitchen one night and finds Bucky kissing Y/N. While Y/N is relieved that their relationship is out in the open it soon becomes more complicated than she could have ever imagined.
Author’s Notes: Thanks to the lovely @melconnor2007 for the request. Steve to the rescue! I always love hearing from you guys <3.
I grumbled sleepily as I turned over in the bed. Another morning – another terrible hangover. It had been a few days since my phone conversation, or lack thereof, with Bucky – and he had been silent ever since. Today was the last day Nicole could stay with me as she needed to get back to her life, her family, and her job. She begged me to go with her, but I had politely declined. I needed to find my footing again and figure out what my next step was. There was no way I could go back to Stark Tower – not after everything that had happened. I sighed to myself as I stared at the ceiling. I could hear talking in the other room which I tried desperately to ignore until a knock at the bedroom door caused me to angrily huff, “What?”
“You have a visitor,” Nicole called through the door. My heart jumped as I shot up in the bed just in time for her to open the door. “Captain America?” Nicole asked jokingly.
“My friends call me Steve,” he responded as he looked at her with a grin before turning his gaze to me – the grin slipping from his face.
I smiled weakly at him – the sudden spike of adrenaline mixed with my hangover was making the room tilt in an odd way. “Hey Stevie,” I muttered before laying back down in the bed and ignoring the presence of both Steve and Nicole.
“And she’s just been like this?” Steve asked in the other room. It was a few hours later and I was fully awake, but unwilling to leave the room out of pure embarrassment.
“For days now. I’m honestly not sure when she’s been sober during the last week,” Nicole replied. I scoffed. That was a little overdramatic. I drank every night to help myself sleep – I had just always happened to drink enough to feel horrible the next day. “What about your friend? This Bucky?”
“He’s absolutely miserable. Shuts himself away from everyone else. Snaps every time someone tries to talk with him. He hasn’t been like this in a long time,” by the sound of his voice Steve was certainly concerned. I was too – I couldn’t help but feel a sudden urge to jump in my car and go to him.
“Do you know exactly what happened?” Nicole asked pointblank. I could always count on her to cut through the shit and get to the bottom of the problem.
“He won’t talk to me about it. He just tells me it’s his fault and that he’s miserable without her. Has… has Y/N said anything?” he asked uncertainly.
“It’s probably best that you talk to her about it… So you um… don’t really mind staying with her?” I bolted upright at this. I didn’t need to be passed off like a child – I was capable of taking care of myself. I pushed off the bed and stomped into the living room. As I opened my bedroom door Nicole was picking up her bags and already turned towards the front door. I stopped and awkwardly cleared my throat. I felt all the anger leave me in a rush; I really didn’t want her to go. She turned to face me and gave me a smile before dropping her bags and taking the remaining steps to close the distance between us before giving me a bone crushing hug. “Take care of yourself, sis. I can try to come back soon,” she added nervously as she pulled away and looked at me.
“I’ll be fine,” I answered meekly.
“You always are,” she responded as she turned and grabbed her bags before making her way to the door.
An awkward silence fell on the room once she had left. Steve turned to look at me – his eyes already asking the questions that had been running on repeat in his brain. “So…”
“Are you hungry?” I interrupted. I knew I was in for an interrogation, but I wasn’t about to let it start without getting some food.
Steve shook his head in exasperation. “If I say no will it help me get the answers any faster?” He couldn’t help but let a grin tug at the corners of his lips.
“Nope,” I grinned back at him.
“Okay fine – you lead and I’ll follow,” he answered reluctantly.
“Why did you run off?” Steve asked as he set the plastic menu on the table. I sighed heavily –so it was straight to business then. I had hoped that maybe we could get through dinner with pleasant conversation and hold off on the heavier conversations until later. I motioned for the waitress to take our orders. Once she was gone I picked up my untouched glass of whiskey and swirled the ice inside it lazily.
I peeked up to see Steve staring at my intently. He wasn’t going to let me off the hook. “It… it doesn’t matter Steve,” I tried my best to be nonchalant but my attempt landed flat.
He scoffed – obviously annoyed. “It does matter and you damn well know it,” he replied impatiently.
I rolled my eyes at the severity of his tone before meeting his eyes and realizing the hurt that laid behind them. “I’m… I’m sorry Steve,” I muttered into my glass. “Everything just got so messed up.”
“Y/N, what happened? I can’t help fix it… if you won’t tell me,” he answered earnestly as he reached across the table and placed his hand reassuringly on mine.
I swallowed hard – it would be harder to tell Steve than it had been Nicole. I looked at him with a sad smile on my face. “I… I love him Steve,” I whispered sadly as I shrugged my shoulders.
This was obviously not what Steve was anticipating. His eyebrows shot up before he regained composure and a soft smile formed on his face. “Well that’s not so bad is it?” He asked shyly.
“Did you know he was sleeping with Nat?” I asked absentmindedly. Steve’s jaw dropped open – a slew of half-words falling out. “She said it stopped around the time he started spending time with me,” I added thickly.
“Oh that fucking idiot,” Steve whispered under his breath as he ran his hands through his hair. It was my turn to be shocked – Steve never swore.
“Steve?” I asked.
“He wouldn’t tell me… wouldn’t tell me why you had left or what was wrong.” He was shaking his head angrily as he spoke. “I didn’t know about Nat – I had no idea, but I did have an idea about you.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, my curiosity had peaked over my misery.
“He started to change about five months ago. At first it was subtle, but it started to become much more noticeable. No one else noticed, because no one else knows Bucky as well as I do. I’d catch him daydreaming… He’d smile for no reason… He was just lighter… happier. For the first time since the War I had that young kid from Brooklyn back as my best friend,” he explained as he shrugged sadly. I suddenly became acutely aware of the indention my teeth were making in the side of my cheek. Even as he spoke I felt the butterflies that I always had when I was around Bucky. When we were together there was an undercurrent of excitement like some sort of spastic electricity that I could never explain or reason out – even to myself.
“I miss him,” I answered quietly as I fidgeted with the food that the waitress had set in front of us.
“He misses you. Listen – I’m not telling you to forgive him. Hell, I still plan on getting the full story from him, but come home. Please?” Steve reached across the table once again to squeeze one of my anxious hands. I looked up and lost my resolve in his sad blue eyes. There was no way I could say no.
“I can’t get hurt again Steve. I promised myself.”
“I know – I promise I won’t let it happen, okay?” He smiled sweetly at me as I nodded. Of course Steve was right – I needed to hear Bucky out.
“Are you sure you don’t want to head back today?” Steve asked as he raised an eyebrow curiously.
I shook my head as I continued looking forward. “I agreed that I will hear him out, but I don’t want to go back today. The drive is too long and I need to pack.”
Steve rolled his eyes playfully. His mood had definitely improved since I had agreed to go back to Stark Tower, but he was going to have to wait one more day. I wasn’t mentally or emotionally prepared today after his surprised visit. “So what do you want to do today?” he asked as he spun on his heel and looked at me.
I shrugged. “We could go to the beach for awhile. The weather’s pretty nice. The ocean here is just so much better than what we have in New York,” I responded.
“Deal,” he responded as we continued our journey back to the cottage.
“I know you’re mad at Buck for not telling you everything, but maybe you should meet him halfway?” Steve said as he stared at me from across the little fire we had built in front of the cottage. The sun was starting to set as the evening waned into night. “I just mean,” he added as he raised both of his hands in response to the look I had given him. “Did he know you had a sister?”
I sat quietly as I diverted me eyes from him. He had a point. “No,” I mumbled back.
“And I’m assuming you didn’t tell him for a good reason?” he added.
“Yeah,” I responded as I chewed on my bottom lip. I had tried to keep my life before the Avengers separate from my new life. It was relatively easy. My parents had both died so it had just left Nicole, who had agreed with my reasoning for the safety of her own family.
“Well I think I’m going to head to bed since it will be an early morning,” Steve announced – breaking the awkward silence that had fallen between us.
“Yeah good idea. I think I will too,” I mumbled. We put the fire out and headed wearily to our rooms. I feared that it wouldn’t matter how tired I was – the amount of nervous energy running through my mind and body was sure to keep me awake.
I blinked wearily – trying to wake myself up as we weaved in and out of cars on the freeway. Just as I had predicted I didn’t sleep the night before, making for a very long drive back to New York City. We had had several close calls from my less than stellar reflexes that left Steve grumbling in the passenger seat.
“Y/N! Stop!” Steve yelled as I slammed on my brakes and veered off the road. Traffic had come to a sudden halt and my internal monologue had prevented me from noticing. I put the car in park and shakily placed my head on the steering wheel with a groan. “Okay – that’s it. I’m driving,” Steve announced sternly before unbuckling himself and exiting the car. I sighed in frustration. There was no reason to argue with him after I had almost killed both of us.
“Fine,” I muttered as he opened the door and I unbuckled myself before exiting the car. I stomped to the other side of the car and threw myself into the seat – slamming the door behind me.
“You done?” Steve asked through a chuckle.
“Yes,” I muttered as I shed my hoodie before buckling my seatbelt. I wadded the hoodie into a makeshift pillow and placed it between my head and the window before closing my eyes. Maybe I was tired enough to rest for awhile. “Steve?” I asked as I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.
“Yeah?” he responded as we pulled back onto the highway. We had about four hours left before we reached the city and there had been something I had been meaning to ask Steve.
“Something has… er… well I’ve been wondering something ever since you showed up…. Why did you come instead of Bucky?” I didn’t immediately receive an answer from him so I peeked through my lashes to see him clutching my steering wheel with white knuckles. I had the sudden fear that he would snap it in two.
He chuckled nervously. “Well… I thought I was less likely to get punched than he would,” he responded before falling into an awkward silence.
“And?” I asked as I lifted my head and turned to look at him.
“Well Bucky doesn’t exactly know that I am with you,” he responded nervously as he turned to give me a wink.
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