did i seriously just use that joke what is going on rn

Sincerely Three x Reader with a High Sex Drive Head Cannons (Part One)

Part one 

 Requested by: Anon

 Im skipping around my queue rn, but I’ll get through them all guys

 Enjoy! 


Evan: 

 - My god was this boy nervous around you, you’re very open about sex. You make jokes and when Jared brings it up you challenge him. 

 - “Oh I’ve made some girls scream in bed" 

- "Jared do you even know what a clit is?" 

 - Evan was that kid who was so nervous that his mom would catch him that he never watched porn or jerked off until he was like 16. And due to his lack of friends and girlfriends he’s very anxious when sex is mentioned, he has this idea that it’s really taboo. 

 - You had liked Evan for a while, he was cute and very sweet, also you thought he could use a lesson or two on female anatomy. 

 - BUT YOU WOULD NEVER TAKE ADVANTAGE OF HIM!!!!

 - You asked him out, you could tell he liked you, and a little Jewish birdie (Jared) told you. You got pizza and saw a movie.

 - The movie had a very graphic sex scene in it, in your defense you didn’t know it would happen. You glanced over at Evan and he was having a nervous breakdown, you grabbed his hand and rubbed your thumb over his knuckles. He calmed down and in the end you both were uncomfortably horny.

 - About a month into your relationship you started to get antsy, you two hadn’t even kissed yet, and the more you got to know him on a personal level, the more excited he made you. 

 - You were doing your homework on his bed one night when you decided to take initiative. You took his papers off his lap and replaced them with your body. He instantly started blushing and stuttering, "Evan can I kiss you?” He nodded and you started kissing him softly. Than things accelerated, his hands were tentatively resting on your hips, your hands were tangled in his sandy hair. You were in the zone, so to speak, and ground your hips against his. He gasped and squirmed out from under you.

 - “Ev, it’s okay, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you or anything. Shit Evan I’m really sorry!” You said as he tried to slow his breathing. 

 - “NONONO it’s not your fault, I just, I got nervous. I’ve never um I’ve never done anything like that. You’re my first kiss, and I didn’t want to, um get. Ya know,” he winced, looking away from you.

 - “You didn’t want to get hard?” You had to bite back a laugh, he was so gentle. He just nodded, fidgeting with the edge of his shirt.

 - “Evan you do realize sex is normal, and think about and wanting to have sex is also completely normal?” You ask softly, your hand rubbing his arm.

 - “I. I know it’s just. I’ve never. I’m not vocal. I just. I don’t know what to do at all, I don’t even um watch yow know. Or look at it, I don’t even touch… myself. Very much,” he stuttered and stumbled, his face red and his hands shaking.

 - “Hey, that’s okay, thank you for trusting me enough to tell me these things. I can help you and teach you if you’d like,”

 - “That would b-be nice!" 

 - So that’s how you started to teach Evan about sex. 

 - It started with making out, and than grinding, these he ok with. But the moment you start taking off clothing he feels light headed, so you decide to be a bit sly about it. 

 - You two were going to hang out at his house and before you left you took of your bra. You started kissing him and he felt your nipples rub against his chest. He didn’t know what they were so his instinct was to push them off (like if you have hair tickling your cheek). 

 - his hands brushed your nipples and your breasts and you moaned, god you wanted more. He started to apologize but you laughed and told him he can touch them more if he’d like. He did like, he liked a lot, so he nervously started playing with your chest, he didn’t tell you this but your moans were the hottest thing (More on that later) 

 - So at this point in time Evan was okay with touching you everywhere above the waist, so now you decided to move into more Bare lands. You were making out and you took off his and your shirts, he was nervous but his excitement outmatched it. He actually unclipped your bra, but freaked out when it came off, he rapidly apologized but you were hella turned on by him doing that.

 - you were at Evans one night and you had been making out and touching each other all night, you were so fucking turned on. At 9 Evan went to take a shower and you thought you’d have enough time to rub one out before he came back. You seriously under estimated how long he spent in the shower. And Evan forgot to bring clothes in with him.

 - Let me set the scene, Evan wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, nervously walks into his room, and finds his (very sexy) girlfriend half naked moaning softly in his bed. 

- "Oh shit Evan I’m so sorry holy shit this is the most embarrassing and disgusting thing I’ve ever done I’m so sorry Ev-" 

- "Teach me," 

 - "You, want to learn how to?" 

- "Y-yes," 

 - That was pretty good night for both of you ;) 

 - The first time you two had sex was a pretty interesting way for things to start. You were going to Evan’s house later that day but you were bored so you left about an hour and a half early. You used the spare key and let yourself in, but them you got to his bedroom door you regretted it. Evan was moaning on the other side of the door, you instantly thought he was cheating on you. But than you heard "oh (y/n) oh god (Y/n) fuck me please ooh fuck,” you suddenly realized he was actually jerking off to think about you. So you entered, and subsequently scared the shit out of Evan. You walked seductively across his bedroom, disrobing yourself as you did. I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination;) 

~Random Headcanon shit~ 

 - When ever you were turned on (frequently) you’d send Evan some scandalous photos. You in your underwear, your boobs, and videos of you touching yourself and moaning some less than appropriate things. 

 - He never tell you this but he saved the photos and videos and used them to get himself off when you weren’t around, god your moans were the sexiest thing to him. 

 - You two frequently have “No Pants Parties” which are exactly what they sound like and definitely lead to a lot of sexy times 

 - Not mine but I read something very similar to this in a fic. 

 You bought yourself a new pair of Lacy underwear and decided to wear them to Evan’s, you weren’t wearing pants. You bent over to grab something and Evan goes “nice ass” THAN IMMEDIATELY REALS BACK AND TRIES TO APOLOGIZE. It turned you on (cause anything he did turned you on) and you guys definitely banged. 

 - You definitely tease Evan in public, you’d palm him under tables, whisper dirty things in his ear, and run your foot up his leg. 

 - Evan loved it when you rode him during sex, just the feeling of you on him, also he wasn’t the strongest so it was kinda hard for him to hold himself up and also fuck you. 

 - As the two of you date for longer he slowly becomes more and more open about sex and being attracted to you. You were SHOOKITH When you were at your aunts wedding and he grabbed you ass when he knew no one would notice. 

 - This boy loves hickys. Getting them, giving them, seeing them later on. He absolutely loved it when he was about to go down on you and he saw the little bruises from the previous night. He also liked it when he’d go to take a shower and he looked in the mirror and saw the love bites all over his own body. 

 - He definitely uses sex toys on you, for foreplay and other wise ;) 

 - when you were turned on and he wasn’t, he would eat you out or finger you, but let’s be honest when wasn’t he turned on by you. 

 - He absolutely loved your high sex drive and was so happy that you were dominant because he usually wasn't 


Dom! Evan x Reader w/ high sex drive HCs

 - He gets really quiet but hella physical when you try to tease him in public. 

 - You two were out to dinner with friends and you all had a few drinks, you were palming him under the table, he slid his hand under your jeans and into your panties and started fingering you hard. He’d whisper dirty things in your ear and wouldn’t let you get out of your chair, and he definitely made you cum. 

 - He was more of a grope than a smack kind of guy. He’d rather grab your ass than smack it. 

 - definitely gets into polite dirty talk for example: 

- “Oh fuck, you u ride my cock so whi baby girl" 

- "You like that? Huh? I bet you like that just as much as I do," 

- "Oh god yes, just like that princess, oh yes fuck," 

- "Hmm shit your tight pussy feels so good?" 

 - Probably likes tying you down and also being tied down, very light BDSM. 

 - Both sub and dom Evan will cuddle you a ton after sex and there are many mornings when you wake up to him straddling your ass and massaging your back.

 - "You were so freaking amazing last night baby, I figured you might enjoy something relaxing. 

 - You liked Evan because he was cute and sweet, but you never expected him to be this sexy 


 Jared and Connor will be up soon!

needy; connor murphy x reader smut

requests: too many 

okay motherfuckers, it’s here and its kinky as hell

word count; 1673

TRIGGER WARNINGS; KINKY SMUT, ITS AGAINST A CAR SO IN PUBLIC OKAY, connor calls the reader nicknames like babygirl etc, T E a s i N G, lowkey a lil hint of degradation but just a lil’, LEMME KNOW IF IM MISSING TAGS

ITS NOT PROOFREAD RN CUZ I FEEL BAD ABOUT POSTING LATE


It was almost pathetic the kind of affect Connor had on you by just being near you, but what was even more pathetic was the affect he had on you when he wasn’t around. The fact that after only a few days of being apart, you started to become almost desperate to see him again, to feel him again.

 You see, Connor had been away for a week because he had been forced to go on a trip with his family. And while it’s not like you two hadn’t sent your fair share of racy texts and pictures while he was away, it was nothing near enough to satiate you.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey, I love your writing! I think I've consumed everything at this point. Do you have any favorite stories you can recommend? I may have blasted through all the fic updates of my own faves and just looking to see if people are reading stuff I might have missed. Looking forward to your next updates! No pressure!

Anon!

First, I am so very sorry it’s taken me so damn long to answer this. 

I actually did answer it - I wrote a very long, very beautifully gif’d post and then accidentally scrolled left on this stupid macbook and I lost the entire fucking thing and I wanted to throw my laptop out of the window.

::calming breaths::

Let us pray that doesn’t happen again this time (I am a klutz, so it’s a definite possibility). Secondly, I decided that now is the perfect time to recreate this answer because a) there are some goddamned talented ass writers out there killing the game rn, b) there are also haters out there trying to steal our joy rn and not only is it not going to work, I think now is a good time to spread the love as far and wide through Richonne as possible, so reblog the shit out of this and get reading if you haven’t already and c) I don’t have time to write the way I want at the moment so I hope this makes up for it.

I also really really need a list I can return to b/c I signed up to read a lot and am still verrry slowly getting through it.

So! Here goes…

Current Favorite Richonne fics…!

1. Round After Round by @nattah-gudgrrl

ZA Canon - Rick and Michonne after 6x10, being domestic and sexy af, round after round.

Holy crap, Anon. I was hooked from the first few words. I’m not finished yet, but this is incredibly sexy and beautifully well-written. Nattah’s writing is hypnotic and poetic. She drops precious gems throughout each chapter with her words, the way she phrases things is so original and addictive. Rick and Michonne are pitch perfect, but so is everyone else (and she’s hilarious, btw). She includes music to score her amazing writing, and trust me, listening to her suggested tracks while reading will only suck you deeper into the tantalizing atmosphere she’s created with these two. AND THE SMUT. HOLY SHIT. Prepare yourself. I love opening up to a chapter and letting myself fall. I almost feel like I need to smoke a joint, turn out the lights, and close my door reading this, no joke. (no seriously, i’m not joking, be alone b/c you will feel thangs down there)

2. Musings of Rick Grimes by @nyese3529

NonZA AU - Rick as a NYC photographer slowly falling head over heels for a charismatic college student Michonne as she becomes his muse.

OKAY. I’m not sure anything I say here will do this amazing piece of fanfiction justice. I’m not even caught up, but the chapters I have read so far are PURE FIRE. Nyese is a master at unfolding a real, atmospheric, moody, sexy, intense, and totally riveting Rick and Michonne for us to fall in love with from the start. Rick’s attraction to Michonne leaps off the page, as does she. She is so damn cute and sexy and seeing her through Rick’s eyes the way Nyese has written them is just to die for. Nyese also NAILS New York City life, especially as a southern transplant and artist (I feel you Rick) AND as a young, gifted black woman looking to make a difference while everyone else covets her light (I feel you Michonne). It’s a beautiful read, and I encourage you to ASAP. The smut is off the chain, as in every fucking moment of it had me squirming around wishing I had me a Rick Grimes here in NYC damn you Nyese you’ve ruined me!

3. The Art of Control by @avintagekiss24

NonZA AU - Rick as a sexy, wealthy contractor Dom and Michonne the comic book shop/cafe owner as his sub in Atlanta (bonus: featuring probably the best version of Maggie I have ever read)

GOTDAMN. Let me tell you something. THIS IS THE SEXIEST RICK GRIMES OF ALL TIME FOR ME. Every fucking word Miss Kiss wrote for him to utter had my panties wet and my brow sweating, do you hear me? This fic is hot as fuck. Even before Rick Grimes shows up in the story, I was feeling hot and bothered about his mere existence, just like Michonne. The way Miss Kiss writes the buildup throughout their relationship is simply riveting. She’s a very visual writer, just like Nyese, so I can see, taste, feel, and ground myself in this stunning world of money, undeniable attraction and absolutely delicious sex. AND DID I MENTION HER MAGGIE IS SEXY AF, FUNNY AF, NAUGHTY AF, AND GODDAMN IT I WOULD SO BE HER PLAYTHING?? The plot is really good, too, like really good. Screw 50 Shades of Garbage. Miss Kiss’s sub!Michonne and Dom!Rick Grimes are what you want, what you need, what you deserve. Go forth, and savor every moment of this. In fact, I need to catch up, myself. Hell yeah.

4. Sirens of the ZA, by @isisnicole

ZA AU - Michonne and her two sisters, fierce, trained fighters, find and protect Carl. Richonne begins to develop once Carl is finally reunited with Rick three years later.

Sigh, I love this fic. Miss Isis hooked me with her stellar opening, and the plot just got more and more compelling the more I read. Carl is still very Carl, but he’s got that “loved, protected, and taught to survive by three amazing black women” vibe to him that makes my heart melt. Ila, Luna, and especially Michonne are just everything in this. EVERYTHING. Their relationship is tight af, they keep it real, they are badass warriors (trained, medal-winning warriors, mind) and even though your heart yearns for Rick and Carl to reunite and for Richonne to soar, you cannot help but fall in love with the family dynamic that Miss Isis has written for them with Carl. The tension between Rick and Michonne is even more intense in this than in canon when they first meet, I’d say, but deliciously so. And once they both start to realize the business, it’s time to pull out the popcorn because the buildup is sooooo good. And did I mention an alive Shane and Merle, also written so well you kinda sorta forget they didn’t make it in canon? Yeah. Read this.

5. Red Dirt Road by @siancore

NonZA AU - Young!Richonne in southern af King County, Georgia, teenagers that fall in love one summer along a red, dirt road.

Honestly, this fic is just perfect. The world is real. I can smell the dirt. I can feel the heat. Rick in this is juuuuuuuust….! He’s everything we think of when we think of a teenaged Rick (but not underage of course). Kind, responsible, stoic, patient, respectful, and sexy. Michonne is a vessel for us all, transporting us back in time to when we went to our grandmama’s house and she bossed us while loving us like nobody else could. The whole gang is there and they’re all written to perfection, especially Shane. He’s as shady and selfish and yet completely charismatic as you’d expect a young Shane to be. The story is so sweet and the pacing is comfortable, fun, and easy, just like those summers we spent messing around with our friends, falling in love, learning to drive, staying out after curfew. I adore Sian’s writing and this is by far my all-time favorite of hers right now. It’s a must, must read! 

To Continue Reading, So Help Me…!

1. HALO, by leeeel

Holy smokes. I have only read chapter one so far and it is absolutely amazing. AMAZING. I reeeeaalllyy need to get back into this one. Rick and Michonne meet under dire circumstances, and the mystery begins. The writing transports you, and I actually got chills reading this. CHILLS.

2. Deception by @severelybabykryptonite

YO. I HIGH KEY LOVE “THE BODYGUARD” AND THIS IS THE RICHONNE VERSION AND IT IS EVERYTHING. Rick as a no-nonsense bodyguard to Michonne’s sexy, vulnerable star is a dream come true. I really need to catch up on this one, it’s just so good and it’s visual and it makes my geeky movie+Richonne loving heart soar. 

3. The Day I Met You, by @chezza3009

I almost don’t know how to describe this one. It’s dark. It’s riveting. It’s nothing like I’ve ever read in Richonne before. Rick and Michonne in the aftermath of an affair that leaves Michonne devastated and Rick a mess. I don’t recognize this version of Michonne or Rick, but then I need to continue reading. What I’ve read so far makes me very, very intrigued by this story. And it shall have my undivided attention ASAP.

4. The Beginning, by @vegasloversteel

Once again, Vegaslover has an uncanny ability to hook you with great story telling, dialogue that flows like “how is she doing this??” and chemistry between Rick and Michonne that vibrates off the page. Richonne is hot hot hot in this. Set in their college years with a great plot and fun with all your faves. Gotta catch up!

5. Palm Trees, by @cake-by-thepound

I AM SO UPSET I CANNOT PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THE JUICY FIC TALK GOING ON ABOUT THIS STORY RN. Arrrrgggh the spoilers I’ve seen alone are killing me not so softly. I just loooove the way Cake writes Richonne’s worlds. Rich, grounded, dramatic but in a real, honest-to-goodness “that could totally happen to me” way that makes me want to stand up and cheer. I know this is going to be a beautiful ride, so far everything I’ve read is perfection, as usual, so I’m really looking forward to the day I am finally caught up and I can (too late, of course) dip into the forums and be like “GURL. BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT PART WHEN…” 

You Thought I Was Done? LOL.

These are the stories I haven’t gotten to yet, but that are also on my list. I’ve heard nothing but good things and I am hoping to get to them soon!

Right Where We’re Supposed to Be by @tigerwalk3I’ve read her mini-fic Sparklers and I cannot wait to dive into this one. Her characterization alone is amazing, and the way she puts phrases and details together makes me low key jealous.

Honey Bees by @cranesinthe-sky - I don’t get enough Michonne and Judith in my fandom diet and I’ve heard some really awesome things about this one. I’ve heard nothing but praise for Lady Cranes’ writing, so I’m excited!

The TWD Chronicles by @yellehughes - I read Yelle’s Richonne Secret Fantasy fic and loved it, and I actually feel rather ashamed that I haven’t gone back to dive into this epic Olympian take on Richonne!! Allow me to correct this, with the quickness. 

The Hunter of Screams, by @codename-me - I started this, and holy crap is it amazing so far. Like me, Lady Codename has a thing for sci-fi and fantasy, and her writing is rich and detailed and visual, which totally turns me on. 

The End of Wanting, by @glowysweetfab​ - I have started this, and love this period AU, it’s immersive and the plot is so interesting I’m not even all that fussed to get to the romance bits (well that’s a lie, of course I’m trolling for smut but I’m really enjoying the ride).

Honestly, there are so many more stories I have favorited/followed that it would take me all night to list them all here. But I will do more posts like these as I finish fics and move on to others, it’s important to me to show the same support for all of these amazingly talented writers that they have shown to me, and to spread as much positivity as possible because they deserve it. 

This fandom is chock a block full of major talent, huge hearts, astonishing intellect, and abundant passion. No one can deny that, and anyone who does is lying. 

READ AND WRITE ON, RICHONNERS!!!!

Thanks for the ask, Anon! 

-Kendra

P.S. I promise I will get back to updating as soon as I can. I’m in the middle of preparing myself to move across the country and transition to a new career. But my beloved fics are always on my mind, and boy do I have such glorious Richonne in store for you! Thanks for sticking with me! I promise you won’t regret adding a few of these ladies to your reading list, either, if you haven’t already. 

BabyDaddy!Cal Pt.6

A/N: I’m really struggling putting these chapters out and I feel bad for it, but I want y'all to know I’m doing the best I can. Surprisingly, I typed this up a bit fast and it turned out well in my opinion, so I’m guessing the writers block is diminishing. Y'all know to get this to 100 notes and feedback is very much appreciated (especially rn). Hope you nuggets enjoy💕

**WARNINGS**: Smut because it’s highly requested and  to makeup for my struggles in the last chapter


Parts: one, two, three, four, five, six,seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty{END}


“So, now that I’ve told you the latest drama, how’s tour been?” Connor smiled through the screen of your phone while cuddled up into Felix’s chest. You hadn’t spoken to your boys since you’d left for the tour two weeks ago and missed them dearly.“You and nugget okay?”

“It’s great and we’re fine."you reassured as you munched on some pickles. It’s crazy how often you crave the salty snack. "It’s fun as hell traveling the world.”

“I bet. You’ve seen more places than both of us ever will.” Felix chuckled.“What about you and Calum? How many times have you beat him?”

“Like three.” Calum hopped into your conversation as he plopped down beside you, placing his head into your lap the best he could while your belly poked his head.“ I deserved it, though.”

Keep reading

~ still not gay ~

Word Count: 2 800

Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour

Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz

Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)

Summary:

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.
PJ: what?
dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)

Keep reading

Dance - Park Jihoon

Idea: 3 Years Younger! Reader X Sunbae! Jihoon

Summary: You and Jihoon had been close since you both were little but since you both had started to go to the same high school, things have gotten a little messy. Needless to say you both started acting in ways that screamed jealousy. 

Author’s Note:  WOW ITS BEEN FOREVER SINCE IVE WRITTEN (i have tests every week wow i hate school) I’m so sorry if this isn’t really what you wanted, I wasn’t sure how to write this bc I’m doing it from Jihoon being international age (18) which would make the character 15 so i made it super cute and not really angst? also bc i’m not good with writing angst IM SRRY ILY

Recent A/N: OH GOD IM READING THIS OVER AND I THINK ITS SUPER BAD SO IM SORRY TO WHOEVER REQUESTED THIS (also if this does not have the keep reading bar on mobile i am sorry rip the mobile ppl bc i made this really long FHDJSKFHK 

~~~~~~~

  • “oh Y/N look it’s Jihoon!”
  • you classmate almost yelled as you went towards the window of classroom. You saw park Jihoon walking into the school with his two friends and you couldn’t help but think about how handsome he was
  • Jihoon was almost like the school’s star, almost bc Kang Daniel was the school’s star. 
  • but nonetheless it didn’t matter bc you has a huge crush on him 
  • emphasize on the word crush because there were tons of other girls who liked him as well. 
  • the only problem you had…was well 
  • yall were three years apart. 
  • so like 
  • you were pretty sure that even if you had the chance to date him his army of fangirls will hunt you down and take you down like nothing mattered anymore. 

Keep reading

Mrs. Y/L/N - Regina Mills X Reader

Originally posted by rebeccamader


Regina x reader : where your best friend , Emma hacked Regina’s twitter account and changed her name into “Mrs.y/l/n” because she know that you and Regina like each other just to stubborn to admit it . Please and thank you   


Y/N: Your Name

Y/L/N: Your Last Name

Y/N/N: Your nickname


You were writing a note to yourself, to remind for the fifth time you to buy eggs - god damn it Y/N - when your phone beeped.

Em: Yo loser.

You picked up your phone, rolling with your eyes when you saw the message. While you opened your mail on your laptop with one hand you typed back a response with your other hand. Multitasking!

You: What is it, idiot? You need food?

Em: Surprisingly not. I just ate. Grumpy brought food. I don’t know why.

You: Maybe he was in a good mood?

Em: Have you read his name.

You: All right, Mrs. Smart ass, what is it then?

Em: Can’t I message u without wanting something?

You: ….

Em: Fine. check out Regina’s twitter account rn.

You: Why would I. I’m busy.

Em: C’mon.

You: seriously em why? She never posts anything

Em: Please please please please please please please

You: Fine.

Keep reading

halerogers  asked:

what about some good ol' domestic fluff

I’m really hungry rn so I wrote about breakfast, also Mille is featured because I love her so much. Seriously, guys, check out this pup

“Mmm… Something smells good,” Stiles announced as he strolled into the kitchen, running a hand through his messy hair. Their puppy, Mille, galloped after him into the room, skidding to a hasty stop at his feet, nearly colliding with the back of his legs.

Derek looked up from the griddle, a plastic spatula in his right hand. He smiled widely at his fiance, who was yawning, and succinctly explained, “Thought you might like some chocolate chip pancakes to celebrate your day off.”

“You would be right,” Stiles claimed with a beaming grin, his stomach rumbling in anticipation as the smell of chocolate and freshly brewed coffee hit his nose. He took a couple more steps into the kitchen, Mille following him like a lost duckling that had imprinted on him.

She did end up bumping into his leg when he stopped beside the kitchen island, resting his hip against it.Chuckling, he reached down to scratch under the puppy’s chin, bending over to kiss the spot of white on her forehead.

Straightening up, he crossed the room to the pantry, opening it and rifling around for the bag of dog food. Mille danced around his ankles, yipping in excitement when she heard the sound of Stiles scooping up some food.

She followed him over to her food bowl, tail wagging as she skipped around, still barking. As Stiles filled her bowl, he addressed Derek, “Maybe we could take her for a walk later. She could use the exercise.”

He smirked as he wandered over to Derek’s side, joking, “And she always gets me plenty of phone numbers.”

“Wow. Really, babe? Using our puppy to pick up cougars in the park?” Derek tsk-ed, shaking his head in disapproval as he pursed his lips. Stiles had to hand it to him, he really did have the disappointed dad look down pat. It would definitely come in handy when they had kids.

“Yup,” Stiles answered cheekily, laying his head on Derek’s shoulder and coyly batting his eyelashes. “You don’t mind, right?”

Derek set down his spatula on the counter and turned down the heat on the stove. A moment later, he had Stiles in his arms, spinning him around a few times before setting him on and counter.

He braced his palms on the counter on either side of Stiles’ hips, leaning in close to bump their noses together. Pressing his forehead against Stiles’, he murmured, “Guess again. Something like that deserves punishment.”

“Oh my god, please tell me you’re gonna spank me,” Stiles blurted, setting his hands on Derek’s bare chest, drawing circles with his thumbs. His face was flushed from laughing so hard when Derek spun him around, his pale face blotchy and red.

But Derek just shook his head, a devious smirk curling his lips that were just out of Stiles’ reach. He leaned in close, as though he was going to kiss Stiles, but just before their lips could meet, he declared, “No bacon for you.”

“Aww, come on!”

send me a theme and I’ll write a 500 word fic for it!

cnjk9799  asked:

Can I please request a Arranged Marriage AU with Dino? (I saw your post and thought it was my opportunity, there aren't lots of scenarios for my babyy😭 *or Jeonghan's baby should I say*) Thank you in advanceee❤❤

AU #1 (Request from this list! Tryna finish it!)

Ft.Dino/Chan

Enjoy love~😊 THIS IS GOING TO BE PRETTY LONG TO REPAY THE TIME LOST Also note: To anyone not a girl reading this, this is female!reader, I tried making it gender neutral at first but doing this made it easier and less tiring, sorry. SO MANY REVISIONS TO THIS ISTG

  • This big baby
  • Does not want to get married
  • Ever.
  • But oops parents want him to get married stat
  • Basically the polite way of saying “sON GET A LIFE”
  • He really does not want to get married
  • But darn it can’t avoid this one
  • Parents already setting him up on dates with random strangers and daughters of friends
  • And they’ll only stop when he finds a girl he likes
  • “Wtf mom why can’t I just have some peace?!?”
  • But he goes on these dates with all these girls…
  • THeY’rE aLL sO bOriNG
  • Like honestly some are girls who just have good looks but plain lives, some of them are rich and stuck up, or not his type etc etc (wow he has a type in this AU what)
  • Chan’s just so tired
  • Seriously he just wants to have some free time off school to himself
  • I mean he just graduated college, can he get some time??? GIVE ME TIME TO GROW UP PLS?!?!
  • BUT LET’S TALK ABOUT YOU
  • A WONDERFUL PERSON GREAT AT WHAT YOU DO
  • GUESS WHAT THAT IS
  • WORking at a restaurant
  • Kinda anti-climactic but anyways
  • You work as a waitress, for your good friend Mingyu probably in there cooking whatever
  • But you also play piano/keyboard to attract customers and sometimes perform inside
  • Like you would be getting tips and attracting people in, with things like “You think my playing is beautiful? Try my friend’s pasta inside it will beautify your tastebuds. No seriously it’s really delicious, you should try!”
  • (Now I wanna write a crossover w/Italian wizards Jun/Joshua in Italy WHO’S WITH ME?)
  • Mingyu’s gonna be like “you told them about the pasta didn’t you” when he gets a bunch of orders for it
  • No Mingyu is not my bias he comes up in these AUs by chance
  • UPDATE Mingyu is my sick-bias (bias whenever I get sick) bc GermGyu
  • Anyways one day you go to Starbucks during your break to get a MIDNIGHT MINT MOCHA FRAPPUCINOOO K sorry inside joke
  • wHY dO I keEp MaKinG mY DinO aUs In CoFfEe ShOpS
  • And look who’s here
  • No not Chan but his mom
  • “Oh my gosh you’re so pretty! Want to go on a date with my son???”
  • You agree…bc you don’t want to be rude…
  • You just forget it ever happened but wtf?
  • Anyway back to Chan who’s tired af
  • But later that night, he has to meet another girl for dinner
  • The girl invited him to have dinner at Mingyu’s restaurant
  • You’re working your waitress shift, counting tips or smth
  • Then Chan walks in through the open doors
  • Damn.
  • He looks very handsome
  • HOw DId hE GrOw uP SO faST
  • Like you can’t help but stare at him with curiosity
  • …oh yEAH MY JOB
  • So you go up to him and he follows you to an empty 2 seat table
  • And he decides not to order until his date comes
  • So you leave him be with some bread or something to snack on
  • I sense another inside joke becoming chAN AND HIS BREAD MUNCHIES
  • You wait a little before going onto a small platform in the center of the room
  • A stage with a piano
  • *Deep breath*
  • And playing
  • Chan just stops chewing and stares
  • Everyone is watching you playing beautifully
  • And the keep reading bar appears

Keep reading

Deity!Seventeen AU - Hoshi, God Of Festivities

Author’s note- I’ve actually planned out an entire au for like,,,which gods all of seventeen would be, so if you wanna see more for any reason just send me an ask for who you’d like to see lmao

  • Hoshi is one of the most well known gods
  • Each god has a festival dedicated to them during a day in the year, and Hoshi’s is the most grand
  • Think Mardi Gras in New Orleans
  • The streets get completely decked out in decorations and lights, people set up food stalls and knick knack tables, along with game booths and more
  • Its the WHOLE SHABANG
  • He usually just improves the overall mood of any celebration, like even for a little kid’s tiny birthday party he makes sure that each person involved is having as much fun as possible
  • He’s one of the gods most heavily associated with humans and because of that he’s one of the most revered/loved
  • Even if he doesn’t show himself often, people can often sense his presence when he’s watching over a celebration because it can go from boring and borderline awkward to downright jovial
  • And now to you
  • You had always liked the annual festivals for the gods
  • They always had special food and games and when you were younger you had memories of winning prizes and goldfish from the lil game stalls (you still had some of the stuffed animals lining your shelves in your room)
  • But,,,at the same time,,festivals were meant to be spent with many people
  • So while you had always loved the festivities,,this year you were…,disappointed
  • Because of some Typical School Drama, you had found yourself friendless, which was a kick to the teeth on its own, but now you couldn’t even attend the year’s biggest event because you were too scared of seeming like a loser by going by yourself
  • You had actually planned for this to be the one time in your life you missed Soonyoung’s festival,,even though it had always been your favorite, simply because you didn’t want to embarrass yourself
  • But your parents downright refused
  • They wouldn’t accept any excuse for you to miss you favorite time out of the year,,,,so, that’s how you found yourself in the town square, alone just outside of the crowd and surrounded by glowing lanterns and laughter
  • And okay it was…,, just a bit heartbreaking
  • Here you were, at the festival that you had made so many good memories at every year,,but you almost wanted to cry because you were all alone and apart from everyone else who were having fun and enjoying every aspect of the party with their loved ones and friends
  • Meanwhile, Soonyoung had sensed something was up
  • He’s a god of festivities so of course he naturally has a perfect read of the emotions swirling in the air around him, especially at the festival dedicated to him
  • And he had been enjoying himself for the most part; he didn’t directly attend his own celebration in human form seeing as Jihoon had told him it was an exceedingly bad idea (Jihoon: if you show up in your physical form you’re gonna end up getting yourself drunk and making a repeat of the festival in 1838   hoshi: but that wasn’t that bad-   jihoon: you caught a food stall on fire. Four times   hoshi: ,,,fine), so he decided to just watch over it
  • And then,,,apart from all the emotions of joy and fun,,,there was something else
  • Disappointment, withdrawal, and overwhelming sadness,, all emanating from you who had resigned themself to a bench just outside of the town square
  • And in true hoshi spur-of-the-moment fashion, he decided to say screw it to Jihoon’s warning and made his way to you
  • You had been scrolling through your phone, refreshing the same four apps and your mood only worsening because apparently every single social media page was overflowing with pictures of the festival. The same festival in which you were alone at and you weren’t going to cry about it even though your eyes were definitely burning and you really wanted to cry because hell this was pathetic-
  • But then suddenly someone was sitting next to you and leaning forwards so they were in your line of sight
  • And even worse it was a cute boy and fuck your eyes were probably red and hell you looked so stupid maybe he wanted to tell you it was pathetic that you were here all alone and you knew that he wouldn’t and that it was just your mind fucking with you but what if-
  • But he simply asked if you were enjoying the festival with a soft smile on his face
  • (you weren’t sure what it was about him because usually that question in this scenario would,,,upset you more because cmon of COURSE you weren’t enjoying it but. Somehow you felt comforted)
  • So you just answer with a shrug and look down at your feet, saying,,,well not really because..,,, its no fun when you’re alone
  • And you nearly jump out of your skin when he grabs your hand and pulls you to your feet, flashing you a beaming smile as he starts pulling you back towards the crowd and hes like well good thing you aren’t alone anymore!!! Cmon what do you want to do? let’s buy some food!!
  • Part of you is really freaked out because wtf you don’t even know this guy why are you letting this happen ??? but another part,,,,a much larger part,,,is kinda happy??? Like this guy had seen you were upset and was trying to cheer you up and his eyes were so genuine,,,,,,plus he was really cute
  • He was also buying you food how could you say no
  • Somehow being around him was making you forget about all the drama that had hung over you before
  • But wait shit you dont even know his name whoops better ask for that
  • And so u ask and,,,when he replies with Hoshi ur like okay thats really cute omg but like internally because you’d prolly jump off a bridge if you said that out loud
  • Him: thank you!!! I’d say your name is cute too but i don’t know it
  • You internally: time to jump oFF A BRIGE
  • You externally: its y/n haha :))) didn’t mean to say that out loud but y’KnOw
  • Next thing you know hes ruffling your hair and hes like i was right!!!!! It is a super cute name good thing we match huh?
  • Ur 100% blushing
  • And Hoshi just leads you around the festival, keeping conversation flowing so easily that you wonder for a moment if this is actually happening because?? Here’s this absolutely gorgeous boy seemingly with a heart of pure GOLD and hes??? Listening to you attentively and following up your dumb jokes and jesus christ he’s so extra but in like,,,the good way
  • like ,,,at one of the game stalls he was just like BET YOU 20 BUCKS I CAN WIN THE GIANT HAMSTER PLUSHIE and ur like BET YOU 20 BUCKS YOU CANT
  • And of course hoshi doesn’t like losing so he might have used his godly powers just a bit,,,and you’re like damn oh well a bet’s a bet and you’re digging money out of your pocket and normally he’d GLADLY take money but
  • ,,,this time he couldn’t accept it because hell he was trying to help you have fun and he wasn’t accepting offerings rn, so he was just like nono that’s fine actually here have the hamster-
  • And youre like but we made a bet
  • Him: hmm,,,,right,,how about you give me a smile instead?
  • The GREASE
  • But Hell u were NOT expecting that and you feel your face getting hot and hes just like woahhh cuTE and you’re like HUSH GIVE ME A SECOND
  • And after going around the festival,,, Hoshi buying you snacks you looked at for longer than a second,,winning you cheap game stall prizes and even a bag of goldfish,,,you couldn’t help but think that somehow this had become one of the best festivals you’ve ever been to
  • Not a moment had passed where you weren’t having fun or smiling and you knew that it was all thanks to Hoshi
  • And so you were just a bit reluctant to head back home, even when the last firework show had ended and your mom told you to start heading back over text,,,you just wanted this to last forever
  • But you tell hoshi that you have to head home,, and he does look a bit sad but hes like ill walk you home!! And you joke like what do u just wanna see me more lmao and hes like yeah of course???
  • Cue you almost choking on air because Hell what the Fu k that was too genuine sounding what is this????? Feeling??? No none of that in this house
  • You cough to hide the flustered noise you made,,,and then you were walking in the direction of your house, a bag of goldfish held carefully in your arms and with Hoshi walking next to you and talking excitedly about his friend Woozi
  • You: woozi? That’s a cute name
  • Him: yeah but hoshi’s cuter isnt it
  • You: i dunno-
  • Him: HOSHI’S CUTER ISNT IT
  • And ur like yes yes hoshi is a cuter name,,in fact this fish is gonna be called hoshi
  • Soonyoung is screaming inside like wtf,,,,this human is so cute,,,and he kinda starts feeling bad that he probably won’t ever see you again,,
  • Unless-
  • (somewhere in the distance, Jihoon has begun screaming)
  • UNLESS
  • Out of nowhere, he just bursts out IM A GOD
  • You: sure sure ur a god of the game booths like you won every single-
  • But hes like NO IM SERIOUS im sOONYOUNG and ur like lmao alright but hes like pouting because wth!!!!!
  • And you just adjust the goldfish bag and ur like sure id believe you if you did something godly lmao
  • And of course you were just joking because cmon,,,,you believe in the gods but seriously?? The god of Festivities taking a human form just to cheer you up? You weren’t that special-
  • But then he coughs to get you attention anD WHAT THE FUCK IS HE FLOATING
  • You trip over your own feet in fuckin shock because wait are you SERIOUS the actual god of festivities sHOWED HIMSELF TO YOU TO CHEER YOU UP WHAT
  • And hes just casually like i told you!!! And you can’t really retort because there’s your house but you also wanna fuck with him,,,like just a bit because,,,,,it was really funny when he was upset that you didn’t believe him
  • So you’re just like ok so you can float??? Big Whoop only a Real God could summon forty pounds of gold right here right now
  • Him: NO GOD CAN DO THAT
  • You: god??? More like con
  • He’s screaming inside but you just nudge his shoulder and say jokingly “hey ill believe you’re a god if you go to prom with me”
  • But it turned on you because he was like OKAY SURE like rIGHt away and youre like wAIt-
  • He just asks for when it is and what to wear and ur,,,,gonna ride this good luck train because hell you weren’t gonna have a friend to go with anyways so?? Why not ?? plus ur kinda like,,,its not like hes gonna actually do it anyways like??
  • He’s probably gonna forget about you after he goes to wherever gods go,,,right?
  • Anyways,,you go into your house and before you close the door he just says “see you later!!” and ur like haha sure ok bye
  • And ur mom is like :))) did you have a good time??? Aren’t you glad you went??? Ur like oml FINE OK i had fun GOD MOM
  • Before you go to bed you pull out your old fish tank and clean it out before putting ur new buddy in,,bc ur fish is a KING he won’t be rotting away in some BOWL no he deserves a fully filtered tank with a bunch of decorations ((take care of your fish properly kids))
  • But,,,,it wasn’t the last time you saw Soonyoung
  • Because like two days later??? You hear your mom say that your friend was downstairs and ur like lmao what friend but whAT the fuck soonyoung is in your LIVING ROOM
  • And okay you’re DELIGHTED because you may or may not have missed him even though you only knew him for a few hours,, so ur like fuck it this god is my friend now lets go play mario kart
  • His godly powers might be able to win rigged fair games but he has no power over the domain of video games
  • Translation: he got really upset because you beat him 6 times in mario kart and 3 times on wii sports
  • And without realizing it,,,it kinda became normal for you to hang out with him?? Like sometimes he wouldn’t even go to your front door like normal and you’d just hear knocking at your window and at first you almost had a heart attack,,but now you’re just like oh its Soonyoung
  • Your favorite part of the day becomes learning the latest Divine Drama
  • Soonyoung: so Jeonghan was teasing Chan so Chan got upset and called Seungcheol but then Jeonghan just ended up teasing Seungcheol and so Seungcheol called Jihoon-
  • You: omg he did NOT
  • Soonyoung: he DID-
  • Sometimes you’ll leave stupid lil gifts at Soonyoung’s shrine like a little trinket at a garage sale that reminded you of him and he always gushes about it to the other gods like loOOK my human friend got me a THING do any of your followers do that???? No????? Well guess im just the best-
  • He also occasionally shows up to walk you home from school bc he’s impatient and wants to talk with you bc cmon you’re the most fun human he’s met-  well,,, fun in the sense that he knows you, and he doesn’t know many other humans as well as he knows you
  • And plus you always laugh at his jokes and the other gods don’t
  • But,,,as the days tick closer to prom which,,you were actually getting quite excited about because hell you actually??? Had a trustworthy date because Soonyoung reminded you constantly that he would show up,,so you couldn’t help but believe him
  • Alas, Jihoon has started catching on to Soonyoung’s feelings towards you,,and he’s seen gods that have fallen for humans before and it usually ends one of two ways
  • One: very very good, everyone ends up happy and theres a new god in the land
  • Two: very very bad, either the god has to watch the human die or the god has to abandon the human and it hurts both parties involved
  • And though Jihoon might pretend not to worry about the other gods,,,he doesn’t want to see Soonyoung hurt
  • So,,,though he doesn’t want to,,,as the god of reason he felt required to pull Soonyoung aside,,
  • And Jihoon explains like,, Soonyoung i know you like this human a lot but,,please think about what you’re dealing with
  • Soonyoung’s just like i know what im dealing with im dealing with a lovely person
  • Jihoon just sighs,,,,like no i mean seriously. Before you leap, think-  are you going to get tired of this human as soon as another interesting one stumbles along? Are you going to accidentally involve this human in matters they can’t control? We’re gods, Soonyoung, and though it’s fun to be around humans, it’s dangerous. So think about what you’re going to do before either of you get hurt
  • And soonyoung just,,,sobers up completely and he can’t help but,,,realize that he was just a bit caught up in you…
  • He couldn’t imagine hurting you?? Thinking back to when he first met you,,it broke his heart to have learned why you had been crying all alone at his festival and,,,,he really, really didn’t want to be the cause of that, ever…
  • So he decided; he would stay away from you for now,,,but if he still missed you after the time passed, he would see you again
  • But even then he didn’t realize that he was making choices before thinking
  • When Soonyoung didn’t show up at your house for a few days, you thought nothing of it
  • He was a god with duties to fulfill; you understood that and so you weren’t upset or anything when he was gone for a few days. Of course, playing video games and doing homework alone was less fun without him there,,but you could manage
  • You trusted him to keep his promise to go to prom with you,,and you even allowed yourself to get fully excited. You had even picked out a dress that was actually expensive,,and even tho ur not like,,a cheesy person….
  • Interally ur like,,,,,i hope  he thinks its pretty but right after that ur like wtf is this????a drama?????
  • Regardless, no amount of internal irony or cynicism can stop you from excitedly waiting at your meeting spot the night of the prom,,,just a little bench that you two would eat lunch at together on weekends
  • And you were all dressed up, your hair styled up all fancy and your makeup done by someone way more equipped with liquid eyeliner than you’d ever be,, and you can’t help but smile as the clock ticks closer and closer to the time you agreed on
  • Then 7pm hits, and hes still not there, but you don’t worry because hey even gods can’t make it on the dot right?
  • Then….7:30….8……9
  • As each minute ticks by, you feel the pain in your chest grow,,,of course when you had first met him, you had expected this outcome, but after all the time that had passed you had really grown to trust him
  • When the clock finally hits 10, you swallow the lump in your throat and head back home, holding back your tears so that you could at least tell a decent lie to your parents that you had fun with your friends
  • Meanwhile
  • Soonyoung had been thinking, more than any carefree god of partying usually would, about you
  • Because,, while he understood Jihoon’s warning…he really didn’t like staying away from you
  • He missed hearing you rant about your teachers and the stupid questions people asked in class, he missed how you would fall backwards whenever you laughed really hard and how, if he told the perfect joke, your laugh would turn loud and goofy. He missed how you would pretend to be annoyed when he whined about how you weren’t paying attention to him,,,he just missed you
  • So fuck it, right???? He just BUSTS INTO WHEREVER JIHOON’S STAYING and jihoon is just like SOONYOUNG WHAT THE FUCK and soonyoung just yells JIHOON I THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND I LIKE THEM A LOT SO IF IT ENDS UP BAD I’LL DEAL WITH IT
  • Jihoon: :)
  • Soonyoung: what’s with that face. Why aren’t you disappointed.
  • Jihoon: you actually made a decision on your own,,, just wait until seungcheol hears this-
  • Soonyoung: JIHOON PLEASE NO
  • Everyone fears Seungcheol’s Dad Mode.
  • But, as Soonyoung prepares to run back to you and apologize for his absence,,Jun stops him
  • Because, guess who has a charm in their house for Jun?? Of course you would, your family believed in every god no matter how small,,,,and so,, Jun knew what happened
  • And hes just like Soonyoung,,my man, what time is it
  • Soonyoung: time to tell y/n i like them??
  • And jun is like oh my god i meant literally
  • Soonyoung’s like oh its 11- OH MY GOD PROM JUN HOW BADLY HAVE I FUCKED UP
  • The moment Jun just shakes his head, Soonyoung is ready to Die because usually Jun LOVES rubbing mistakes in people’s faces,,,,not even like in the mean way because usually they’re minor,,,,but if he’s not even gonna say
  • well,,,Soonyoung makes it to your house in record time and oh hell he can definitely feel that something is very, very off
  • He’d always been able to sense when you were upset, he just never knew it would hurt so much to realize that he had caused it,,,because if he listened hard enough he could hear you crying through the window
  • And its fair to say that you were only upset more when you hear a familiar knock at your window
  • All the hurt that had built up in you at every hour that had passed sitting alone in the dark turned to anger the moment he showed up
  • And you hated feeling angry,,you hated feeling all the negative energy running under your skin because it made you want to punch a wall but you never would so all it did was turn to bitter tears and more anger
  • So,,when you got up and went to your window only to see soonyoung….you closed the blinds
  • Or,,you try to but he sEEs your plan and his hand just slams on the window anD HES LIKE Y/N PLEASE DONT LET ME EXPLAIN-
  • And ur like what?? Ur gonna explain why you ditched me? Dont worry i understood your message anyways
  • His heart? Shattered into a million pieces
  • But,,,ur weak and too kind for your own good, so you open the window anyways because its probably cold outside
  • Soonyoung just tumbles in on hes knees and hes like liSTEN YOU DONT HAVE TO FORGIVE ME BUT LET ME EXPLAIN ILL MAKE IT UP TO YOU 1000%
  • You just wipe your eyes and nod bc even though you’re really, really upset,,you still know deep down that Soonyoung doesn’t have a mean bone in his body,,,,and usually if he does something rude its always on accident,,
  • And then he just SPILLS everything that’s happened in the last week; what Jihoon warned him about, how he got worried about hurting you (you: you already did that   him: I  kNow im so sososososososososososo-   you: soonyoung-   him:SOSOSOSOSOS O SO SORRY) and how he decided to stay away from you just so that he would have some time to think about what choice to make clearly
  • Before you can even get a word in he just jumps to his feat like listE N ILL MAKE IT UP TO YOU wanna go to a restaurant??? Ill buy you food we can go to the fanciest one in town gO get ready lets go!!!
  • He just looks so ready to GO ur just like okay,,,,just a minute,,
  • You gotta make it look like you haven’t been crying for the past half hour,,,and for a moment you can’t help but smile because when you look back he’s bouncing on his feet and staring at the clock on your wall and,,,soonyoung always displays his emotions so clearly its endearing,,
  • Before you know it soonyoung has your hand, dragging you down the streets and talking a mile a minute,,,
  • And ur just like soonyoung,,,soONYOUNG and he pauses in the middle of his sentence about the super fancy restaurants like ???
  • You make him stop walking bc ur lowkey exhausted because everything is happening FAST and you’re like hey listen i see what your goal is but how about we get some cheap fast food instead and just hang out??? Like normal??
  • Its like you just gave him a puppy like his face just LIGHTS UP and you see his Signature Hamster Smile
  • So you buy like two handfuls of chips and junk food from the nearest convenience store and Soonyoung says theres this really nice clearing in the woods to hang out in and he can tell Joshua to leave the two of you alone
  • And thats how you find yourself sitting on a log next to a pretty little pond in the middle of the woods with a god next to you who is. Currently struggling to hold the armful of snacks you guys bought at the 24 hour convenience store buy your house
  • You can kinda tell that Soonyoung is walking on eggshells around you,,,like his jokes don’t poke fun at you and he makes sure to give you any snack u ask for when he would usually make you play rock paper scissors for dibs,,
  • Okay you can’t help it because the thought he was putting into his actions was. Really endearing but at the same time you kinda want old rambunctious soonyoung back
  • So you push him slightly with your shoulder and you say, “Okay Soonyoung, I’m still a bit upset but I forgive you okay? Just explain a bit more ask to,,,like,,..why you avoided me??”
  • Once again, he acts like you just gave him the fucking world n for a moment you wonder if its okay for a god to be so easily impressed but you brush it off as he starts explaining
  • And its basically him repeating the speech Jihoon gave him and you’re nodding along until he’s like well I decided to say screw the rules like i mean i know it’s kinda weird for a god to fall in love with a human but hey whatever right-
  • You’re entire mind just kinda,,, fizzles out
  • In love??? God in love with a human?????? What?? //taps mic// hello?? What the fuck??
  • Soonyoung notices that you froze and he just blinks at you, not really understanding what he said to make you freeze up
  • You: s-soonyoung you s-said-
  • Soonyoung: that im in love with you? Yeah
  • You: SOONYOUNG
  • And hes just like well if you don’t like me back then we can pretend i never said anything but,,, im just sayin I’m a god and i can read emotions pretty well so i know you like me back :)
  • You push him off the log and he almost cries when his cheetos fall into the dirt
  • ~~dating a LITERAL GOD~~
  • You wanna have a significant other that’s your best friend at the same time BOOM. SOONYOUNG
  • So its partially the same to how it was before; he still comes over and tries and fails to beat you at video games, he distracts you from school work (but only because he could tell you were starting to get stressed) and he still teases the everloving shit out of you
  • But at the same time, he kisses u. A LOT
  • Like Soonyoung is the world’s GREASIEST boyfriend ever,,,like he uses fucking pickup lines and youre like soonyoung we’re already dating and hes still like BECAUSE YOU’RE THE ONLY TEN I SEE
  • (you love it but you’ll never say it outloud)
  • He actually takes you to meet all the other gods?? Like he can’t take you to the god’s dimension because you’re human and all but he can call them down to meet u
  • Jihoon is like oh hey, you’re the human that soonyoung always talks about
  • Soonyoung is like jihoon SHHhshHSH but its too late youre already like :)))) oh so he talks about me?
  • Truth is Jihoon 100% plans on getting back at Soonyoung for worrying him so he makes sure to explain in detail all the things soonyoung told him about you
  • “Oh yeah one time he came back and i asked him why he was smiling and he said, and i quote-” soonyoung is fuckign writithing on the floor like JIHOON PLEASE NO “AND I QUOTE, ‘Jihoon you wouldn’t understand you don’t know what LOVE is like’”
  • You never let it go. You tease soonyoung about it constantly and he grumbles about how he would kill jihoon if gods weren’t immortal-
  • But every time he can never stay mad at you because you always kiss him on the cheek and he can’t help but smile
  • Sometimes he likes to play around and be like “youd COWER in the face of my true powers” but at the same time hes like “Y/N LOOK LOOK LOOK” while he makes a bunch of tiny glowing orbs that look like multicolored fireflies just because he wanted to impress you
  • Whenever you’re upset he can obviously sense it and he always tries his best to cheer you up, and if its something that a simple joke won’t fix, he’s always good at listening
  • Like,,,you don’t know if its the whole ‘god’ thing or not but he just always makes everything feel a bit less serious, like your world won’t end with a mishap
  • As a whole, dating god of festivities Kwon Soonyoung is happy and fluffy, with a side of lovely Godly Drama that he always spills to you as soon as it happens
my thoughts on ch 192-194

My 2 cents on the current arc in 19 days :) This is entirely my opinion and I do not speak for anyone,, 

Okay first of all, I do like how the story has been going so far. This arc is creating new opportunities for so much more development!!! e.g. backstories of jianyi and the he brothers and possibly mo (who knows, mo’s father could be connected to all of these), development between he and zhan, and ofc development between zhan and jian. OX is taking 19 days to a much deeper level now, instead of the usual zhanyi/tianshan hanging out and having their moments. The arc started off with jian being kidnapped by an old dude (claiming to be mr jian’s old friend) which is then followed by jianyi’s mom finding out and the short revelation of the relationship between jian and his mom. And then the recent chapter where jianyi is shown to have been trapped in an old warehouse with said old dude. (It’s all been pretty dramatic but that’s to be expected)

So yea, I too, like many others, believe that jian is being kidnapped for revenge (possibly trying to lure mr jian out)(how he’s going to exact his revenge…..we don’t know yet) and looking at the past 3 chapters, am I satisfied with the way OX has played them out? Yes.

Chapter 192: Jianyi kidnapped!! This chapter provided a sort of base for the whole arc. In this chapter, before jian got kidnapped, there was the whole family thing again; jian was sad after seeing zhan’s family and wished he had one. And from here, I believe the possible overarching theme for this arc would be jian’s family.

Chapter 193: The reveal of Mrs Jian!! This chapter reinforces the theme of family (a continuation to jianyi saying “mum probably isn’t home yet” which I thought was a nice fit). So we find out that Mrs Jian isn’t the ice cold queen we all thought she was. We see that she cares tremendously for jian (she knows what she did to him and is remorseful) and is badaSS AF. Through this chapter, ox gives us hope that action is being taken to save jianyi. (And by his own family which is all the more heartwarming, don’t you think?) Again, a step into the revelation of jian’s family.

Chapter 194: Jianyi trapped!! OK this chapter was a hell of a ride so let me just say what I think about this chapter. The chapter started out pretty light hearted (almost ironical seeing how its juxtaposed next to jian’s dangerous situation - could this mean anything?) but I felt like it ended on a very serious note. OX basically injected comic relief into this chapter and I can honestly understand why’d she do that.

OK SO A BREAKDOWN OF WHAT HAPPENED: jian making jokes (the hetian thing) >> light hearted thoughts on jian’s part (zhan xixi, coming after my beauty) >> TURNING POINT: jianyi realising his mum could be in danger (FAMILY!!!) >> jian trying to attack (failed) >> threat by old dude. 
There were criticisms regarding this chapter, about how weird it is, having light hearted comedy in such a dire situation (almost seemed as if OX didn’t know what to do). However, there are a couple of reasons why I think comic relief was injected into this chapter.

1) the last two chapters were emotional and serious although 19 days is known to be more of a comedy. Maybe OX thought it was fitting to tone down on the seriousness and lighten the mood? 

2) jianyi’s personality at play (by my fav!!! jianyi enthusiast @19daysruinedmylife: jianyi tries to act all happy and positive in bad situations BECAUSE HE LEARNED IT THAT WAY. Ever since young, he was often alone and thus, needed a way to cope with it, which is acting all happy. It’s part of his childhood.) So yea it is an innate habit of jianyi’s to laugh at a predicament first, instead of crying. 

3) assure the readers that jianyi is not in a particularly dangerous situation for now (his life is not threatened, he’s p much just locked up) 

But of course, this light hearted comedy was only for the first half of the chapter. It got serious again after jianyi thought about his mom. Which brings me to my next point: jianyi’s kidnapping is still a big deal, the comedy was just a temporary relief from it. The ending was far from lighthearted, even ominous tbh, serving as a reminder of jianyi’s precarious situation. Is the old dude really planning to hurt jianyi? For now, I don’t think so. The act of pulling on the hem of jianyi’s pants was just a threat, to induce fear in jianyi. The old dude could have physically attacked jianyi while he was bound or could even have brandished a weapon, but he merely pulled the hem of jianyi’s pants (which is so much more harmless ngl).

so ya tldr: i am very satisfied with the arc rn and am vv excited to see more of what ox has in store for us :)) i am also looking forward to seeing tianshan being incorporated into this arc (would REALLY like to see mo and he’s backstory tbh)

SORRY FOR RAMBLING

@ that anon who asked why i ship amamatsu

you asked pretty rudely so i’m just gonna put this under read more bc i’m gonna be explaining the stuff (note, anon asked it like they were sending ship hate so uhh yea you get the gist of how i will be talking) to the ppl who like sa///matsu please don’t take what i say too deeply aaa i’m just trying to analyze stuff with my poor skills, also v3 spoiler warning so beware

Keep reading

Idubbbz and Tana Mongeau - when you pick the wrong guy to fuck with

Oh boy, this drama is gunna be messy.

This is probably going to be less of a rant and more of a warning annnnd slightly educational.. lol

actually im just really angsty today, seen all this slander about one of the best youtubers to exist, so i gotta vent here we go

What happens when your channel is run-of-the-mill clickbait-y shit, can’t take a joke/dont know what satire is, and you call out the most savage person to ever internet whose entire platform is based on decimating YouTube careers without refute?

Dear god Tana, do you know what you’ve gotten yourself into? I would say she’s oblivious, but I don’t think that’s the case. Her first tweet to idubbbz before all this happened was back in December (I believe? Too lazy to find it rn) where she called him out on his use of “the N word” and “retard”. What I find ironic is that directly after that she told him to kill himself 😂(butthatsnunofmybusiness). Irony is a beautiful thing.

ANYWHO, to anyone who finds these offensive and racist and isn’t familiar with idubbbz, sit the fuck down a moment. (If ur offended and traumatized by “the n word” and other shit like that u may want to shield your eyes in the next part to avoid being traumatized. Wouldn’t want to end up like Tana, would we?) *ahem* now listen up buttercup

1. The term “n***er faggot” and “gay retard” pertain to people who have said it to idubbbz in the past in hate videos. He is parodying those people who tried to demean him by saying those things. it is a long running joke on his channel.

2. His channel content consists of this amazing concept called s a t i r e. If you don’t know what that means, look it up, remember it, don’t forget it, because that term will allow you to thrive on the internets and most likely survive in the real world. With its power you can have fun, and experience freedom in elevated proportions. Any slur he uses is never used in seriousness - like I said, it is a long running parody on his channel. He is not intentionally being racist or offensive or whatever other label you can pull out your ass.

3. Learn to laugh ffs? This dude legit has vids of eating shit out of sewers and dumpsters. Why. Why would you take anything he says seriously

Now to the rant part yey

The thing that pisses me off the most is the blatant. fucking. lie Tana told. She described in her video that Ian had put her in a “choke hold” of some sort, which i’d expect to be around the fucking neck right? And apparently, he was also talking really loudly goading her to say “the n word”

now here’s the reality:


(here’s the OG vid)

wow he’s just choking the life out of her makE IT STOP WHAT A TRAUMATIZING EXPERIENCE

Things i do see: A genius joke

Things i dont see: a choke hold, loud voice, or goading of any kind

For those still confused as to what the joke is, is goes back to her december tweet. he must have found it funny. her tweet is so ironic and priceless how could he not? its the most atypical idiotic white girl tweet from a youtuber, so he decided to show up at her expensive-ass meet and greet to continue the joke (which im hoping was intended for a future content cop in the first place). He’s standing there as if taking a picture with her, and here is the best part. Instead of “say cheese,” he says “say n***er”.

GOD I LOVE THIS MAN

What im most curious about how that’s a chokehold of any kind. Truamatized? GIRL HOLY SHIT I WOULD SELL EVERY LIMB TO JUST BE IN THE SAME ROOM AS IDUBBBZ, LET ALONE HAVE THE FUCKER STAND NEXT TO ME. TOUCH MY PLEBIAN EXISTENCE EVEN. FUCK

some people just arent worthy. the world doesnt deserve you, idubbbz. im sorry.

another thing; she said in her younow mental breakdown that it was idubbbz himself who sent his followers to bully her. bitch where? he didnt say a damn thing (yet). She’s kinda done this to herself entirely, and is now wondering why. First off she started this shit on twitter, then lied, then attacked him on twitter for something he didnt even do?? what. the fuck? he did absolutely nothing but try to make a joke. you know what in some ways i feel bad for her not only because she’s unwittingly screwed with the most immortal community on youtube right now, but because she cant see the problem is her and it’s only going to get worse if she keeps it up jfc. I dont necessarily think she’s the worst person on yt either (though i havent watched many of her vids). If she didn’t blow things out of proportion she might’ve been able to salvage what she had left of her yt career. I guess sometimes mediocre content isnt enough. Often times I hope idubbbz just let’s it go for her sake but…idk, he hasn’t done anything yet and who the hell knows. Honestly I don’t like people being sent hate. But when ur ignorant its gonna fucking happen. Especailly when you think you’re morally superior to someone when you are in no place. ESPECIALLY when you dont know the facts. Choose your battles wisely.

anyway I’m not even entirely pissed at the situation, but ooo the god awful fans of hers. They’re taking e v e r y thing in idubbbz videos out of context and making them ‘offensive’ to push their anti-dubbbz agenda. Like, did yall actually watch the videos?? satire ????? ironic humour ???? do any of you know what this is???? do you even fuckin meme bro ?? ? ? ? why would i expect any less from the fans of this type of melodramatic girl who makes shitty content??? and just slander and misinfo in general dear fucking god when will the sjw trend die

well i only have one last thing to say about this: Tana, say goodbye to your youtube career. you wanted to milk this, you couldnt just solve this in peace. instead of owning up to your mistakes you’re going to play the victim, like every other youtuber that gets destroyed. The rest of the sane internet can smell that content cop from here.

TL;DR: do not fuck with the god of youtube comedy. it will not end as planned. Just go with the joke next time, aight?

nuff said.

Dragon Age II - a short summary
  • Hawke: damn we managed to escape from hell in Lothering now things will get better.
  • Ogre: well think again motherfucker
  • Hawke's sibling: don't worry people I'll protect ya'll.
  • Hawke's sibling: *dies*
  • Wesley: don't worry people I'm a templar I'm hella jacked I got this.
  • Wesley: *dies miserably*
  • Flemeth: hey losers I just saved your fat asses by turning into a dragon I already did that in the previous game.
  • Hawke: we lost two of us why didn't you come sooner?
  • Flemeth: you're fucking welcome
  • Flemeth: so bring this thing to this elf please
  • Hawke: why
  • Flemeth: bitch don't make me turn into a dragon again
  • ---
  • Hawke: finally we arrived in Kirkwall now things will get better.
  • Gamlen: well think again motherfucker
  • Leandra: shit bro we rich where all da money at?
  • Gamlen: I've got a problem ok you future zombie bitch
  • ---
  • Hawke: well a year passed I'm not gonna say that things will get better because last time I said that shit went down real quick
  • Varric: *impales someone for no reason* yo join me and my useless brother in a very risky spedition in the deep roads there will probably be no reward at all
  • Hawke: where do I sign
  • ---
  • Aveline: hey what's up I'm a city guard now.
  • Hawke: who the fuck are you?
  • Aveline: shit we met one year ago before the ogre my husband is dead rude
  • Hawke: fuck me I forgot to mention you in the first part of this post sorry girl
  • Aveline: I'm unromanceable
  • ---
  • Fenris: I'm trying to escape to my former master he is a mage
  • Hawke: cool bro cool
  • Fenris: I hate mages
  • Hawke: got it
  • Fenris: no like seriously if you support mages I'll kill you like forreal dough
  • Hawke: no prob homie
  • ---
  • Varric: Hawke we need some maps for that spedition I know a guy who got them.
  • Anders: yo I'm the map guy I also am mage and hate templars
  • Hawke: you look like you're gonna fuck shit up in the ending you know that
  • Anders: I hate templars they're evil.
  • Hawke: k
  • Anders: don't trust them or else I'm going to do something really really stupid
  • Hawke: I got you
  • Anders: I'm going to do something really stupid anyway tho
  • ---
  • Isabela: fuck me
  • Hawke: yoooo
  • ---
  • Hawke: shit I forgot I had to give this shitty medallion to that shitty elf for that shitty dragon bitch a year passed I better hurry
  • Marethari: thanks bring it up that mountain it's dangerous tho someone might die.
  • Marethari: Merrill you're going you little ungrateful shit.
  • Merrill: bitch you always put me in danger first with Tamlen and Mahariel now this I'm gonna call some hella sick demon to ruin this clan you'll fucking see
  • Merrill: just joking I love y'all that's why I use blood magic and I'm trying to restore a big ass mirror I'm not even sure what it does actually
  • Hawke: you're prettier than what you were in Origins
  • Merrill: is this a compliment
  • Hawke: *delivers medallion*
  • Flemeth: yo whassup bitches *turns into a dragon and flies off into the sunset*
  • Hawke: majestic
  • ---
  • Varric: so the spedition started here we are in the deep roads now
  • Varric: hey nice red lyrium idol
  • Bartrand: yeah really nice I'm taking it
  • Bartrand: I'm also leaving you here later assholes
  • Hawke: well shit
  • ---
  • Hawke: here we are in Kirkwall again now things will get better.
  • Arishok: *inarticulate yelling*
  • Arishok: *acts like a bitch*
  • Arishok: *starts a war*
  • Hawke: I should stop saying that
  • Isabela: well I think that's my fault bc I stole some qunari relic
  • Isabela: my bad *leaves*
  • Hawke: Isabela what the actual fuck
  • Fenris: I managed a duel between you and that giant unbeaten Arishok
  • Fenris: that's way better than all of us and Kirkwall's army fightning against six or seven qunaris I think
  • Hawke: who asked you
  • Isabela: hello friends I'm back
  • Hawke: Isabela you slut turn that book rn
  • Isabela: chill
  • Arishok: I'm taking the woman too
  • Hawke: no you're not you ugly horned owl
  • Arishok: *dies*
  • Qunari: we're leaving bye
  • ---
  • Hawke: ok I ended a war what now
  • Meredith: what about another war lol
  • Hawke: why me
  • Orsino: Hawke templars are big fat meanie help us
  • Meredith: Hawke mages are out of control help us
  • Anders: don't worry people I got just a fine solution
  • Anders: *blows chantry up*
  • Hawke: fuCK
  • Sebastian: kill Anders
  • Hawke: where do you even come from?
  • Orsino: we will resist 'till the end!
  • Orsino: nah I changed my mind better turn into a living nightmare and kill everybody
  • Hawke: yeah sure why not
  • Meredith: blood magic is bad so I'll use a magic red lyrium artifact to destroy everything.
  • Hawke: seems legit
  • ---
  • Cassandra: so it's over but we need Hawke now where is that fucker there is another fricking war coming
  • varric: idk lol

anonymous asked:

hi! i was wondering if you could write the RFA reacting to seeing MC's baby pictures?

(To answer your second ask, yep it sent properly don’t worry! And no need to apologize, better to send it twice than to have it not go through and just wonder forever. It’s not like it inconveniences me or anything to have an extra ask to delete it’s just one simple click of a button ^^)

Zen:

  • He loves seeing pictures of you 
  • Selfie exchange sessions are absolutely a thing you guys just sit there showing off your favourite selfies to each other
  • If Zen could use pictures of the two of you as wallpaper he would cover the entire house with them he just
  • he loves them okay
  • When you pulled up some baby pictures for him to see his eyes would light up 
  • He would be laughing and smiling the whole time
  • He call you his cute little prince(ss) Zen shut up
  • He would like to show you some of him too but he doesn’t have any :(
  • Because he ran away from home it’s not like he brought pictures with him 
  • (not that there were very many to bring
  • his brother might have taken a few when he was younger he thinks)
  • He ends up asking his brother if he has any photos of him next time he calls (because they’re trying to work things out now)
  • It’s actually a pretty big deal to Zen
  • He has to prepare himself when he shows you the picture
  • “See? I’ve always been this beautiful~” he teases with a wink but actually he’s so insecure rn???
  • Because Zen was told he was ugly when he was younger he’s still kinda unsure about it like he’s getting over it but what if it’s true
  • He may be an actor but he’s not doing very well at hiding how anxious he is right now please tell him he was pretty
  • You assure him that yes, he is the prettiest child you’ve ever seen (because he really is)
  • And he lights up 
  • And you guys put your baby pictures in one of those collage frames together
  • “Our children would be so attractive”
  • “Our what?!” slow down Zen we’ve been dating for like a month
  • (But seriously if you don’t want kids he’s fine with that too just btw)

Yoosung:

  • They’re your baby pictures but he’s the one blushing
  • “MC you were so cute!”
  • “Were?”
  • “Just as cute as you are now!”
  • Nice save
  • Wouldn’t say anything about embarrassing photos (aside from a stifled laugh that you promptly shove him off the couch for) because he’s a sweet cupcake
  • Also because his mom has shared so many embarrassing stories and photos of him with you he knows how you feel
  • He’s low key thinking about kids too though he wants their child to look exactly like baby MC
  • But he wouldn’t say that out loud
  • If it does slip out
  • He would blush
  • “I just mean. You know. Hypothetically. If we did have one”
  • (He’s also fine if you don’t want them btw you’re cute enough for him)

Jaehee:

  • You know that cute thing Jaehee does where her eyes sparkle and her entire face lights up and her hand comes up to cover a tiny smile that could outshine the fucking sun
  • She’s doing that
  • You’re so cute
  • When you find a photo album full of old baby pictures she immediately makes you guys a warm cup of coffee (/your drink of choice) and sits down to look at them with you
  • Another person who has little to no baby pictures of herself :(
  • She has like one from before her parents died
  • But she doesn’t even know where it is
  • It’s okay though because she’s not focused on the past she’s just happy to focus on the present and the future
  • Except your past okay your past is precious

Jumin:

  • The first time you show him a picture of you as a baby he’s honestly not all that into it?
  • “That’s lovely sweetheart”
  • He’s not being rude about it and he really is happy that you’re sharing with him
  • if you want to look at babies he’ll put one in you right now is that what you want
  • But then he has to actually take a second when you show him a picture of you at two years old with cat ears and a little cat onesie 
  • This is the cutest thing he’s ever seen someone call 911 he has forgotten how to breathe
  • The real fun starts when you ask him for his baby pictures
  • Baby Jumin Han
  • Most of them are like professionally done family photos 
  • But have you ever seen a one year old in a suit?
  • He’s just so
  • Tiny
  • and cute
  • And now Jumin is blushing because he is not used to being called tiny
  • He is over six feet tall he is not tiny
  • Anyways he may not get the whole nostalgia thing
  • But he sure loves watching you be nostalgic 
  • He spends most of the time with a gentle smile on his face watching as you explain the context and stories behind all of your photos
  • And you sigh in exasperation when his stories in return are “this was taken on january 12 1990 by a photographer in dubai″

Seven:

  • You’d better hope there’s nothing embarrassing in there
  • Because this boy will not let you live it down
  • Like ever
  • Unless it legitimately upsets you then obviously he’d drop it
  • He would laugh and tease you and make some joking comment like “thank god there are no embarrassing pictures like that of me”
  • (Because do you really think anyone took pictures of him as a baby
  • Yeah I didn’t think so)
  • And he’s joking and grinning at you but you can tell that he’s actually kind of upset about it???
  • To make up for it you two spend the rest of the day taking stereotypical embarrassing baby pictures of him he does all the dumb baby poses and everything he even puts on a baby bonnet (why do you even have that???)
  • He even uses one of those “what would your baby look like” apps and uses two pictures of himself
  • It does not work well
  • “Look MC this is what I looked like as a baby~”
  • “what the actual hell is that monstrosity”

V:

  • His vision has gotten worse so he can’t see very well
  • And he’s starting to get upset about it because he really wants to see these pictures but most of them are just kind of blurry?
  • When you see it’s starting to upset him you take his hand
  • and tell him to get the damn eye surgery and you describe the pictures for him. 
  • You describe where you are and what you’re doing and what you’re wearing while he listens intently and occasionally asks questions
  • He closes his eyes as you talk and paints a picture in his mind
  • “If you were half as cute as I’m picturing then you must have been a little angel.”
  • He doesn’t have to see you to know you’re blushing
  • Would probably help you do that thing where you recreate baby pictures as an adult (you have to do a lot of the work but )
  • Instead of looking like a dumb meme like Seven it ends up looking like a super artistic demonstration of the passage of time and how you’ve changed and stuff??
  • He can’t see but he still has ~*vision*~

Saeran:

  • Saeran doesn’t see the point in baby pictures??
  • Why would you take pictures of babies
  • Memories, Saeran!”
  • Why would you want to remember being a baby
  • He gets kind of into it though
  • You find him later flipping through your photos and smiling to himself
  • He loves the pictures of baby/toddler you smiling or having fun because it makes him happy to think that you had a good childhood
  • he’s a little jealous but mostly happy
  • He wants to know more about some of the pictures (where are you, what were you doing, why is your head inside a fishbowl in this one?)
  • But the idea of asking you embarrasses him because he’s a tsundere little tomato so he just finds the most ridiculous photo and points to it like “what the fuck is this”
  • You explain the whole story to him and when you see how much he seems to like listening to your stories you just kind of 
  • keep going
  • He likes hearing what a normal childhood was like because he honestly has no clue
  • You two end up falling asleep on the couch surrounded by baby photos
  • Saeyoung takes a picture

Vanderwood:

  • “You look weird”
  • Vanderwood says as their face turns red and they continue to stare at the picture of baby you in a tutu and a tiara
  • so cute?
  • Vanderwood is acting like they’ve never seen a baby before and honestly
  • they probably haven’t??
  • Not like up close anyways
  • The only baby in the agency was Seven Zero Seven
  • You were so soft
  • And squishy
  • And fragile
  • And now you’re like
  • You
  • It’s just pretty fucking neat is all
  • It makes them feel like a desire to protect you even more than they already do
  • Vanderwood doesn’t have any baby pictures to share
  • and there’s no way they were ever that small
  • They don’t mind though they’re perfectly happy to look at yours
THOUGHTS I HAD WHILST WATCHING THE MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS

WARNING. THIS POST CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS FROM THE FILM and is really fricking long. It also contains lots of CUSSING and bad grammar. If you don’t want spoilers I suggest you skip this post but if you want to find out more, plz continue. Oh and it also has a lot of Thomesa comments so if you ship Trenda you probs wont like this…ENJOY!

·      Omg YAS YAS

·      It’s starting

·      Aww little Thomas

·      Aww little Thomas getting dragged away from his mommy.

·      Dream sequence

·      Thomas be like fuck no this again

·      Let the 74th hunger games begin

·      Ooh Minho oppa

·      Lots of shouting

·      So many cross cuts and black outs

·      Ewww Ratman

·      Aiden Gillan is a pretty good actor. Hate his accent though.

·      They’re all really dirty in their glade outfits but they’re still so hot though

·      THE SHOWER SCENE

·      Lol minho in the background: “woo hoo”

·      Dylan is so hot

·      He’s naked

·      OMG he looks so cool right now. He’s so wet

·      Shouldn’t they be suspicious of injections? I mean I would be. Especially if you don’t know who these people are.

·      Oh at least Newt is suspicious.

·      Wait why isn’t Thomas saying anything

·      Jokes he just asked another question

·      Someone better do a question count for Thomas

·      Minho’s wearing red

·      Soo many teenagers

·      If there was more than one maze, where and how did WCKD manage to find a place to fit that many mazes, along with facilities that monitor them. Also, how many grievers would they have made for this purpose? What if the grievers rebelled and decided to do they own shit? Wouldn’t wckd be fucked then?

·      Oh look its Aris. The loner emo boy wearing a hoodie. Remind you of anything?

·      How old is Aris again? He looks like he’s 13.

·      Thomas be like: no let me see her. Such devotion.

·      Please don’t pick a fight with a guard.

·      Yes Thomas, just walk away.

·      Bunk beds. Why is it always bunk beds?

·      Minho: ‘too slow’ ha ha

·      More dream sequences!

·      Thomas the insomniac

·      Aris creepily saying pssst while under Thomas’ bed

·      Just so happens that the air vent opening is right under Thomas’ bed. #movie logic. If you’re reading this CinemaSins and happen to do a ‘Everything wrong with the Maze Runner the Scorch Trials’ based on this post, you better reference me or at least mention me and get people to like this post on Tumblr. Btw, you guys are awesome! [thumbs up]

·      Thomas: “What the hell am I doing?” yeah Thomas, what are you doing?

·      See!!! He even talks to himself using questions.

·      Air vents, the most common way to eavesdrop on people

·      Ooh dead bodies

·      Thomas picking a fight with a guard-WTF ru doing bro?

·      Jeez Thomas take a fucking chill pill

·      Oh he’s getting the swipe card thingy

·      Sending kids back to their rooms-the most common way of grounding children when they do bad stuff

·      Jeez you didn’t have to shove them in there. Such a rude guard.

·      Newt be like: cant we just be happy for once?

·      Thomas has an idea! Everyone hates it.

·      Everyone else be like: of course Thomas. Of course.

·      Thomas dropping into the hallway from the air vent like spiderman.

·      How are you gonna get back up though?

·      Okay so teenagers are being strapped up to tubey things

·      This totally isn’t child abuse

·      Oh no is that Teresa? Jks no

·      OHHHHH its Rachel

·      RIP Aris’ girlfriend

·      I ship it though

·      #Raris… or is it Arachel? Idk

·      Hiding behind poles

·      Lots of dramatic walking in this film

·      ava paige [sitting down and signing pages like a boss]

·      its good to see that the boss is a woman though

·      oh wait let me correct myself, she’s a “doctor”…doctor my ass, more like a lady killer who just wants to dissect children for money.

·      Seriously Thomas you need to calm the fuck down and just tell everyone else what’s going on

·      Great acting though, Dylan O’Brien [thumbs up]

·      #Follow Thomas the leader…or should I say Thomas the tank engine? Ha ha just kidding.

·      Everyone just blindly follow Thomas when we all know he doesn’t have a plan most of the time

·      Fuck yeah Minho is such a badass by kneeing that guard

·      #MINHO POWER

·      God he’s hot

·      Guns

·      Yes lets use the lady doctor as a hostage

·      Operation rescue Teresa

·      Found her

·      Thomas is totes in love with her. He’s so concerned about her all the time.

·      so many Thomesa feels rn

·      Yay window smashing!

·      Thomas and Newt breaking glass. #Teamwork

·      aww Thomas carried Teresa

·      Lots of door barging/blocking moments

·      Everyone keeps shouting Thomas! Like we get it. Everyone is obsessed with him.

·      Why is Thomas always the last one to leave? Or the one who stays behind. It’s like he willingly tries to be the last one standing. Stop isolating yourself Thomas. Everyone knows your chances of survival are better when you’re in a group, not when you’re alone. Thomas is so dumb sometimes.

·      Yay Aris. #Aris the hero. What a wildcard!

·      Is Teresa barefoot?

·      Thomas: *shoots at guys with shields with tazer gun. Gun runs out of ammo. Throws away gun before he starts to run for it.*

·      Can I just say that something about Dylan O’Brien holding a gun, or any guy doing badass but somewhat violent actions gets me so turned on.

·      Man that running and sliding under the closing door was epic

·      Yeah Thomas. U GO!

·      Best bit in movie-Thomas giving Ratman the finger [applause]

·      I bet Dylan O’Brien improvised this scene

·      HILARIOUS

·      How did they manage to run out people on aircraft and dirt bikes?

·      How can they see where they’re going?

·      Wow lots of sand.

·      Of course he doesn’t have a plan Newt. Its Thomas!

·      lol, mountain people

·      The Right Arm reference

·      Wardrobe change

·      It’s really dark

·      Something bad is bound to happen soon

·      Suspenseful music

·      Why do I get this feeling that I’m watching more of a thriller/horror movie than a science fiction film?

·      No Minho don’t turn on the generator!

·      HOLY SHIT, CRANK!

·      HOLY SHIT MORE CRANKS!

·      Run bitches run!

·      Are they inside a mall?

·      Mall chase scene

·      Man, these cranks are scary AF

·      This film is really fast-paced though. It just goes from one scene to another like that-[clicks fingers]

·      Oh look its daytime. Its always safer in daytime

·      NEXT TIME ON GLADERS VS WILD

·      The graphics are great though

·      Sand dunes

·      so much sand everywhere

·      Another Thomesa scene YAY!

·      Wait teresa has her memories?

·      Ooh wait…that means…oh okay

·      Wtf Winston

·      Oh god he’s infected

·      Why is this scene being carried out like page 250.

·      He even says: ‘I don’t want to end up a monster’

·      Depressing death scene when its not even halfway through the movie

·      Wait they’re just leaving the gun with him? Oh ok.

·      Everyone just walks away

·      Goodbye Winston

·      Choreographed halting after sound of gunshot. Nice.

·      RIP WINSTON

·      NO MORE WATER

·      Minho why would you throw the bottle away? You could’ve saved it for later! You’re in a wasteland for Christ’s sake!

·      Sleeping in the middle of the dessert. NICE.

·      Thomas: I see the light!

·      A storm is coming…jks the storm hit immediately in just 10 seconds

·      Ahhh MINHO

·      Minho got hit

·      Character that almost dies but doesn’t trope

·      Minho after getting told he got hit by lightning: ‘Oh”

·      Oh Minho you’re so cute

·      Everyone turns around and sees a crank

·      [I literally jumped when I saw it]

·      More cranks. Wonderful.

·      Oh look who it is. Brenda.

·      GIANCARLO!

·      Brenda’s got sass

·      Ha ha lol, they’re all hanging upside down

·      Minho’s sass lines have appeared!

·      Interrogation time

·      JorgexBrenda moment. How sweet.

·      Wait what? Jorge wants to play music? DAFQ

·      Ha ha wckd is confused

·      This is some old ass music for a film that set in the future. I mean they’re still using cd records. Really? I mean shouldn’t it be coming out of like a boom box or something. It’d be funny if they played Gangnam Style or something. It’d be even funnier if there was an ad before the song played.

·      No Thomas don’t go after Brenda.

·      Seriously though.

·      Thomas is like Percy Jackson, never leaves a man behind. Or woman in this case.

·      Wckd guards are idiots. They’re in shooting range!

·      OHHH SO IT WAS A BOMB TRIGGER SEQUENCE

·      AWESOME

·      That was clever though

·      So many scenes in complete darkness

·      Stop having Trenda scenes

·      Why are you going deeper into the tunnel?

·      Thomas: ‘you think?’ another question. Thank you, Thomas. [sings Girls Generation in my head.]

·      It’s a rat. Gross.

·      Oh and now a crank is eating the rat. RIP rat.

·      It’s time to go now trenda.

·      RUN. Stop standing there. RUN!

·      Oh for Christ sake

·      Epic chase sequence

·      Wow that is some really nice graphics. Really nice.

·      I hate the cranks though

·      Wes wasn’t joking when he said they were scary

·      The cranks look like some RPG zombie game shit

·      Rock climbing

·      Yeah Thomas! Kill that crank!

·      Brenda’s infected. Great. She’s so gonna die…NOT.

·      Finally, there are actually civilians who aren’t trying to hunt down the protagonists or sell them for money.

·      Who the hell is Marcus anyway?

·      Oh that actor. Why is he everywhere? He’s the douchebag bad guy in Dollhouse as well.

·      Yeah sure, just take whatever drink a stranger offers you. Even if they’re acting real shady about it and keep insisting you drink it and go into the party. I mean, I get that you’re trying to find the others but srsly? Would they actually be dumb enough to walk into that party?

·      Yay a party scene

·      OMFG THOMAS IS HIGH

·      Great acting Dylan O’Brien

·      Lol this is hilarious

·      Walk into da club like wow I am so fucked right now

·      Crank execution in a club, why not?

·      For a second I thought the guy killing that crank was Ben.

·      Blue lighting

·      Blue and white are such predominant colours in this film.

·      Okay now Thomas is really high.

·      Hallucinations

·      Eww not Trenda

·      Brenda is so fucking desperate right now

·      Technically you’re not the only two left. You just haven’t found the others.

·      Oh for Christ’s sake you’re both high. Have some restraint would ya?

·      No THOMAS NO

·      Don’t you dare!

·      Fucking hell he kissed her

·      WHY IS IT STILL GOING?

·      Oh now he’s kissing Teresa

·      YAY Thomesa kiss!

·      Jks its only a hallucination

·      Thomas: ‘you’re not her’

·      Poor Brenda. #REJECTED

·      Thomesa spark is still alive

·      Yes Thomas, I knew I could believe in you

·      Thomas blacks out…again

·      Teresa: ‘we have to stop meeting like this’ ha ha lol.

·      Wait so that guy was Marcus?

·      Violent interrogation

·      Threatening by use of death

·      Bertha????

·      Oh it’s a truck.

·      Wait a second… that looks like Stiles’ truck. They’re both blue. Mindfuck.

·      Lol Newt looks so excited to be inside a truck. Ha ha. So cute <3

·      Ambush

·      There sure are a lot of guns in this movie.

·      Oh look Group B finally makes an appearance

·      Aww! Aris, Harriet and Sonya reunite

·      Why do Sonya and Aris seem to have a thing for each other? Maybe it’s just me but she seems way to happy to see him.

·      Who the heck is Vince?

·      Oh look its Thomas’ mom.

·      Don’t remember? Oh okay…

·      Wait Thomas is the Source?

·      Oh so he’s been backstabbing wckd for ages.

·      Good on you Thomas!

·      I feel like Thomas is the only one with an actual conscience.

·      Of course Brenda gets the cure.

·      Yes Thomas, just stealthily reach into her pocket whilst she’s asleep. #totes not a perv

·      Wait Brenda had a brother? His name is George?/Jorge?

·      Wait don’t tell me her brother was Chuck?

·      Brenda: you remind me of him-WOAH don’t tell me Thomas is her brother

·      Brenda: ‘they didn’t want me’ #REJECTED…again

·      YAY Thomesa flashback

·      Just kiss already

·      Newt calling Thomas ‘Tommy’

·      Just when you think your favourite characters are finally safe…it’s bound to get a whole lot worse.

·      OHHHHH Teresa! Why?????

·      I saw this coming though

·      Thomas looks so disappointed in her.

·      Teresa quoting Thomas

·      So sad

·      The ship is no longer sailing

·      #Betrayed

·      Enter Darth Ava [lol]

·      Ava paige reminds me of President Snow. They both wear white.

·      Ratman you son of a bitch.

·      RIP Mary.

·      Oh lol she must be named after Marie Curie.

·      Explosions!

·      No not Minho. Don’t take away my oppa!

·      Come on Thomas! Rescue him.

·      NO oppa, don’t go!

·      Oh yes, it has to end with inspiring speech time executed by Thomas

·      Thomas: ‘I made a promise to Minho.’ THOMINHO IS REAL!

·      And so it ends.

·      Ha lol the number of times everyone said ‘shit’ in this movie

Glob I am so gonna cry in the last movie.

·      The Death Cure: the journey of Thomas trying to save his BFF Minho who he is secretly gay for whilst dealing with the fact that his crush Teresa betrayed him. I can’t wait!

·      God what am I going to do with my life as I wait for the next one?

BTW THANK YOU FOR READING ALL THIS

plz don’t kill me 

Rereading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: Chapter Thirty-Five - Beyond the Veil

i am the opposite of ready for this.

(EDIT: sorry this is so long, i just have a lot of feelings OK)

- ok EW bellatrix is talking to harry in a baby voice and just… gag me

“Oh, you don’t know Potter as I do, Bellatrix,” said Malfoy softly. “He has a great weakness for heroics”

i meeeeeaaaan…. he aint wrong.

But the Death Eaters did not strike.
“Hand over the prophecy and no one need get hurt,” said Malfoy coolly.

yall know lucius is just like ‘get me the FUQ outta here so i can go home to my family plz. lets not make this a thing’

- lol harry is being so casual rn, just trying to stall, asking questions about the prophecy and like, the death eaters are actually answering him??? wuts going on

“You dare speak his name with you unworthy lips, you dare besmirch it with you half-blood’s tongue, you dare-”
“Did you know he’s a half-blood too?” said Harry recklessly. Hermione gave a little moan in his ear. “Voldemort? Yeah, his mother was a witch, but his dad was a Muggle - or has he been telling you lot he’s pureblood?”

JFC HARRY NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOUR SAVAGERY 

- damn what a waste for them to smash all the prophecies like??? those could have been important???

A baby’s head now sat grotesquely on top of the thick, muscled neck of the Death Eater as he struggled to get up again.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUQ

Harry raised his wand but to his amazement Hermione seized his arm.
“You can’t hurt a baby!”

UM HERMIONE I THINK IN THIS SITUATION IT IS PERFECTLY REASONABLE TO HURT A BABY

- OK shit is going BANANAS - hermione just got hit with some purple fire spell that made her pass out, neville just got kicked in the face REAL hard, ginny, luna, and ron are missing… like…i cant handle this rn

He had one hand on Hermione’s shoulder, which was still warm, yet did not dare to look at her properly. Don’t let her be dead, don’t let her be dead, it’s my fault if she’s dead…

ugh. BUT COULD YOU IMAGINE? if hermione died in the 5th book, harry might as well have just given up. like theres no point continuing without hermione

- ok we found the rest of the gang but ron is high as fuq and ginny broke her ankle… SO WE WERE KIND OF BETTER OFF WITHOUT THEM TBH

“Harry, we saw Uranus up close!” said Ron, still giggling feebly. “Get it, Harry? We saw Uranus - ha ha ha -”

NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR JOKES RONALD

“RON, NO!”
Harry did not know what would happen if Ron touched the tentacles of thought now flying behind the brain, but he was sure it would not be anything good. He darted forward but Ron had already caught the brain in his outstretched hands.
The moment they made contact with his skin, the tentacles began wrapping themselves around Ron’s arms like ropes.
“Harry, look what’s happen - no - no, I don’t like it - no, stop - stop -”

MY BABY!!!! jfc this is such a shit show I FORGOT

“You see, there are ten of us and only one of you…or hasn’t Dumbledore ever taught you how to count?”
“He’s dot alone!” shouted a voice from above them. “He’s still god be!”
Harry’s heart sank. Neville was scrambling down the stone benches toward them, Hermione’s wand held fast in his trembling hand.

the truest gryffindor ive ever seen. 

“It’s Longbottom, isn’t it?” sneered Lucius Malfoy. “Well, your grandmother is used to losing family members to our cause… Your death will not come as a great shock…”
“Longbottom?” repeated Bellatrix, and a truly evil smile lit her gaunt face. “Why, I have had the pleasure of meeting your parents boy…”

OK TOO FUCKING FAR. IM OUT OF HERE. 
ok im not but STILL that like, reeeeeally hurt.

- they are now crucio-ing neville. its seriously getting hard to read.

Then, high above them, two more doors burst open and five more people sprinted into the room: Sirius, Lupin, Moody, Tonks, and Kingsley.

on one hand im like ‘YES our saviors are here!!!!!!’ but on the other hand its like sirius im begging you. GO BACK HOME

- neville cant talk bc of his bloody nose and mouth so he just STABS A DEATH EATER IN THE EYE WITH HIS WAND. amazing.

Directly above them, framed in the doorway from the Brain Room, stood Albus Dumbledore, his wand aloft, his face white and furious. Harry felt a kind of electric charge surge through every particle of his body - they were saved.

dont mind me, just silently weeping.

And Harry saw the look of mingled fear and surprise on his godfather’s wasted, once-handsome face as he fell through the ancient doorway and disappeared behind the veil, which fluttered for a moment as though in a high wind and then fell back into place. 
Harry heard Bellatrix Lestrange’s triumphant scream, but knew it meant nothing - Sirius had only just fallen through the archway, he would reappear from the other side any second…
But Sirius did not reappear.

.

But as he reached the ground and sprinted toward the dais, Lupin grabbed Harry around the chest, holding him back.
“There’s nothing you can do, Harry -”
“Get him, save him, he’s only just gone through!”
“It’s too late, Harry -”
“We can still reach him -”
Harry struggled hard and viciously, but Lupin would not let go… “There’s nothing you can do, Harry…nothing…He’s gone.”

this part has always hit me hard because as much as this hurts harry, think about REMUS. his best friend, who he already lost once and only recently got to have him back in his life. like imagine having to be strong for this young boy while you’re silently dying inside. 

basically fuck this shit.

WELP if you liked this, follow me for more chapters!

catastrophic affairs, truly (chapter 3)

chap 1 / 2 / on ao3


lol i know i know its been a while. also its funny bc when tea (demistories on ao3/sadrien on tumblr) released her chapter of staos i was reading it and laughing bc we used the same trope where people find stuff out through the internet. but anyways i swear that was coincidental and here is your long awaited chapter 3(a) enjoy


“Why didn’t you check your phone? I texted you, like, 20 times!” Alya says as soon as Marinette joins her in the classroom. Yeah, I saw them, but I was busy trying to set up a fake relationship with Chat Noir out of all people, so I didn’t look at them. And you didn’t call me, so it probably wasn’t life threatening.

“Uh, I was taking a nap.” Her hair is a bit disheveled, but Alya doesn’t know it’s from yoyo-ing to school as Ladybug. Unfortunately, Marinette’s generic excuse doesn’t work this time.

“Right, then explain this.” Alya holds up her phone, which displays a picture of Chat Noir. On Marinette’s roof. He’s blushing profusely and she’s laughing at him. Marinette almost screams; she’s been fake dating Chat for 5 minutes and there’s already pictures! And speculation!

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