did i say pizza


Yuuri saying those Big Three Words to Viktor for the first time

Viktor can’t handle it. He can not handle it. Viktor.exe has broken down. 

Breaking the Rules - part 4

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary:  Modern!AU You hate James Barnes with a burning passion and the feeling is entirely mutual. Just when you think things can’t get any worse, you are tricked into attending his sister’s wedding as his girlfriend. Stuck with a bunch of strangers, you come up with a set of rules that are not going to last long.

Word Count:1,835

Warnings: the usual more or less

A/N: Fluff! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter :)

Breaking the Rules - Masterpage

Originally posted by jaebummochi

You closed the bedroom door behind you, your eyes roaming the room for your bag. Once you saw it, you made a beeline for the small walk-in wardrobe near the window and squatted down. You fished down at the bottom of your bag and pulled out Bucky’s book. Skimming through the pages, you found the page where he mentioned Dot.

I met Dot in high school. We broke up six years ago.

“Okay, not helpful,” you mumbled to yourself.

Huffing out a frustrated breath, you put the book back in your bag when voices caught your attention. The window was slightly open and you could hear Bucky and Henry talking in the garden. When you heard your name, you tried to peek through the window.

Keep reading

  • jackson: bro. i'm deAdass hungry right now
  • jaebum: yeah pizza. whatchu want
  • jackson: lemme get uhh 🅱️ONELESS PIZZA. wit a 2 liter of coke
  • jaebum: fUCK kind of pizza? and the 2 liter machine broke. but we got 1 liter doe
  • jackson: fUCK U MEAN 🅱️?
  • jackson: ight lemme get that pizza 🅱️ONELESS
  • jaebum: uh? pizza don't got 🅱️ones on em
  • jackson: the fuck did i just say then?
  • jaebum: you said "lemme get it 🅱️ONELESS" like pizza got a damn 🅱️one on it
  • jackson: yall got 🅱️ones in ya shit then
  • jaebum: nah
  • jackson: so what's the problem?
  • jaebum: DICKHEAD
  • jaebum: name one pizza that got 🅱️one on it
  • jackson: just don't put that shits in my pizza bruh. how many times i gotta say it?
  • jaebum: bruh just explain to me how tf pizza can be 🅱️oneless
  • jackson: if it don't got bone in it, it's 🅱️ONELESS
  • jaebum: son, what school you go to?
  • jackson: dawg i don't understand the problem. just make mY shit 🅱️ONELESS
  • jackson: D E A D A S S
  • jaebum: i'm deadass not makin this pizza
zodiac horror story (part 2)
  • ig // sassasstrology
  • the signs are camping out in the woods. they're at a cliché, dark, scary old forest where the murderer always comes and kills people. let's see what will happen..
  • *
  • part 1: http://littlekingv.tumblr.com/post/158545307359/zodiac-horror-story-part-1
  • *
  • aries - male
  • taurus - male
  • gemini - female
  • cancer - male
  • leo - female
  • virgo - female
  • libra - female
  • scorpio - male
  • sagittarius - male
  • capricorn - female
  • aquarius - male
  • pisces - female
  • (that's ^ not really important, but if you want to know the genders of the signs i came up with, there they are.)
  • *
  • - previously on ''zodiac horror story''
  • ''virgo: this forest is scary as shit.
  • aquarius: your face is scary as shit.''
  • pisces: *screams*
  • cancer: PISCEEESSESEESS.''
  • - this time on ''zodiac horror story''
  • *
  • the signs are all traumatized by what just happened. did pisces die? is she still alive? who knows. the signs are sitting in taurus' tent, waiting for the perfect moment to come out.
  • taurus: well, aries, because i wanted to have a tent all for myself because i don't want to sleep with any of you in one tent. and it was really small and cute, i just had to buy it. couldn't resist.
  • cancer: then why are we in this tent and not in yours, aries? you have the biggest tent out of all of us.
  • aries: the tent is only meant for sagittarius and me.
  • scorpio: then don't fucking complain about being in the smallest tent. you are the one who doesn't want to share your big ass tent, so it's your fault that we are here, in this tent.
  • virgo: y'all know that we could easily move to my tent? my tent is the second biggest.
  • leo: what if the killer is outside?
  • aquarius: who the fuck said that there was a killer?
  • capricorn: she could've easily fell.
  • gemini: true, but can you also explain how she's gone all of the sudden and why she screamed so loudly?
  • aquarius: aliens.
  • sagittarius: guys, don't worry. she'll probably be back soon. gemini left too and here she is.
  • gemini: hehe.
  • libra: is pisces gone?
  • scorpio: *hits libra with a flashlight*
  • capricorn: so.. are we going to move from tent or what?
  • aquarius: i just want to sleep, man.
  • taurus: saaMEEEE.
  • cancer: should we just go outside and check if anything's outside?
  • virgo: yes.
  • leo: who's going first?
  • sagittarius: i will go first, i don't care 'bout shit.
  • sagittarius slowly peeks his head out. he crawls out of the tent.
  • sagittarius: no one's here! you all can come out!
  • everyone crawls out of the tent.
  • aquarius: hmm.. what time is it?
  • cancer: *grabs phone out of pocket* ehh.. 3:34 AM.
  • aquarius: OH MY GOD I WANT TO SLEEP.
  • scorpio: well, we aren't going to sleep until we find pisces. let's split up.
  • aries: what?! are you out of your fucking mind?!
  • virgo: why can't we just stick together..?
  • scorpio: if we split up, we have the chance to find pisces faster.
  • gemini: not if she's dead lol.
  • scorpio: she's not. she can't be.
  • capricorn: she can..
  • cancer: WE DON'T CARE. we're going to find her, whether she's alive or not. we can't just leave a friend behind.
  • sagittarius: well, she basically left us behind.
  • aquarius: can i just stay here and sleep?
  • taurus: yeah, can i stay here too?
  • scorpio: no.
  • cancer: wait, what if taurus and aquarius stay here and watch our stuff, and we are going to find pisces.
  • capricorn: good idea.
  • leo: can we just go already?
  • virgo: i ain't leaving if we are all going to split up. i don't want to go alone.
  • cancer: we ain't going alone. we're going in groups. you and capricorn will go that way, leo and libra that way, sagittarius and gemini that way and scorpio, aries and i will go that way.
  • virgo: ugh, fine.
  • cancer: great, let's go.
  • scorpio: and be careful y'all.
  • libra: yay, adventure!
  • all the groups are out in the woods, looking for pisces, not knowing where they are, or where to go. let's see how capricorn and virgo are doing out in the woods.
  • virgo: it's sooooo cold.
  • capricorn: i know.
  • virgo: why does this happen to us?! why, oh, why?!!!!!?!?!
  • capricorn: calm down! we're just going to walk around, head back and then we're just going to say that we didn't find pisces. end.
  • virgo: what!? i don't want to lie!
  • capricorn: well, too bad! pisces probably just left us because we didn't listen to her.
  • virgo: she wouldn't! she would've told me.
  • capricorn: maybe not.
  • virgo: she's my best friend. why wouldn't she?
  • capricorn: soo.. you're her best friend, still you don't want find her. okay.
  • virgo: what? who said that?
  • capricorn: you did. all you were worrying about is splitting up.
  • virgo: that's just because i'm afraid to go alone in the woods, okay?!
  • capricorn: you didn't even say anything when she went missing or when she screamed or when there was a blood trail on the ground.
  • virgo: i-i.. i don't know.
  • capricorn: of course you don't.
  • capricorn starts walking while virgo stands still, not knowing what to do or say.
  • capricorn: hurry the fuck up.
  • virgo: *sigh*
  • let's see how taurus and aquarius are doing.
  • taurus: i wish i had some pizza right now.
  • aquarius: oh my lord. why did you say that?!
  • aquarius: I'M HUNGRY NOW, THANKS.
  • taurus: i have chips in my bag if you want.
  • aquarius: yes please.
  • taurus walks over to his tent and grabs a bag of chips out of his bag.
  • taurus: *sing hallelujah*
  • aquarius: *sings with taurus*
  • taurus: do you want a drink?
  • aquarius: yes.
  • taurus: coke?
  • aquarius: yes!
  • taurus walks over to his tent again.
  • taurus: aqua, do you know where my mini-fridge thingy is?
  • aquarius: uhh.. no?
  • taurus: uughhhhh. someone probably stole it.
  • aquarius walks over to taurus to help him find it.
  • aquarius: uhhh.. maybe behind your tent?
  • they go behind the tent and they see a light in the distance.
  • taurus: hey, do you see that light too?
  • aquarius: yeah..
  • taurus: should we go to it?
  • aquarius: uhh.. i don't know man..
  • taurus: i'm going.
  • aquarius: w-what?!
  • taurus walks towards the light.
  • aquarius: fucking hell.
  • aquarius follows taurus.
  • taurus: heeyy, it's my mini-fridge and a flashlight!
  • taurus picks up the fridge and flashlight.
  • aquarius: phew.
  • aquarius walks back to the camp.
  • aquarius: *looks behind him* taur-taurus? what are you doing? why are you standing there? come on!
  • taurus falls on the ground with 4 knives in his back and one knife in the back of his head. he's.... dead.
  • aquarius: *screams*
  • scorpio: aquarius?
  • *
  • rest in peace taurus.. you will be missed..
  • *
  • stay tuned for part 3, and thanks for reading!
College!AU Jun
  • [double] major: italian / french 
  • minor: translation studies 
  • sports: track & field 
  • clubs: italian opera enthusiasts, french film club, part-time model when the fashion majors need him
  • someone call a doctor because jun is out here on campus breaking HEARTS 
  • as in he’s the most flirty, handsome, witty, “campus casanova” eVER
  • from the fact that he’s studying italian and french because quote on quote; “i wanna to speak the language or romance” to the fact that he refers to anyone he’s speaking to as his ”tesoro” *darling 
  • also like have you seen him?? double language major jun walking around in expensive foreign brands……..aesthetic to the MAX…..jawline for days……one time during a track meet he took his shirt off because it was too hot and everyone discovered that he has a tattoo in italian on his ribs and when asked what it said he just smirked and said “Ho saziato la mia sete alla fontana dei tuoi baci…….” some one translated it and it meant “I quenched my thirst at your fountain of kisses.” and literALLY JUN WOULD 
  • wants to translate operas and plays and things like that when he’s older so that’s why he has the translation minor. he tutors in italian and people who don’t even take italian as their language will BEG him to teach them and when he’s in the library his table is literally just surrounded by students asking question
  • freshmen love coming up to him and asking him to speak to them in french or italian and like they’ll giggle and videotape it and long story short jun has a campus blog dedicated to him probably
  • studied abroad in france and bought a neck scarf that he loves dearly and wears whenever he’s going out and roommate minghao is like “what. is that.” and jun is like “FASHION.”
  • so here you are in this. intermediate italian class because your schedule got messed up because university sucks and you already told admissions but they were like we need a week to fix it so you’re stuck taking ITALIAN for the time being 
  • and like you come in and some overly excited student tries to greet you and you’re just like “buddy. the language i signed up for was beginner chinese. not this.” and the kid gives you a sad look and you’re like yEAH i KNOW 
  • and just as you’re about to take a seat someone taps your shoulder and you turn around and you’re not sure but you think you’ve just come face to face with a real life Angel (it’s jun)
  • the boy smiles and he’s like “are you new to the italian major?” and you’re like “i………….i……………………i…………….um……………….si?”
  • the kid you just told you were in the wrong classroom: ???????
  • but like you sit down and he’s like….right there in the next seat and he like flips through his notebook and god his fingers are long and he’s so lithe??? and gorgeous, his side profile is like an actors or models
  • and ok you’re totally drooling but so is everyone else. like half the class is shooting darts at you w/their eyes because you GOT A SEAT BESIDE A GOD
  • finally the teacher comes in and thank god she’s like “we’ll just do introduction today in english!!” and she’s like “say your name. major. and the best italian food in your opinion!” and so like it goes around and it gets to the boy beside you and he’s like 
  • “im junhui!! jun for short please. my double majors italian and french. best italian food? pizza.”
  • and in your head you’re like: HOLD UP
  • and the teacher turns to you and you say your name and major but you’re like “the best italian food is pasta. everyone knows that.”
  • jun like looks at you and scrunches up his face and is like “it’s pizza.” and you’re like “UM CAN YOU TWIRL PIZZA AROUND ON A FORK??? NO” and jun’s like “CAN YOU EAT PASTA WITH YOUR HANDs???” and you’re like bOY I WOULD IF IT WAS SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE and Jun’s like WELL WITH PIZZA YOU CAN 
  • and honestly you two get up out of your seats to argue about this and the teacher is just like um
  • but now your onto what kind of toppings and sauces are better on pasta or pizza and you’re like first of all. pizza isn’t even historically italian you can trace it back to the middle east??? and jun is like you can trace flatbread. real pizza comes from naples- 
  • and you two just stand there going @ it about the history of pizza for like twenty minutes before the teacher is like SIT DOWN
  • and you’re like “you may look good but you don’t know what you’re talking about.” and jun snorts like “i do look good and i do know what im talking about.” and you’re like “WELL Obviously you’ve never had REAL GOOD pasta in your life if you say pizza is better.” and jun’s like “what constitutes ‘real good pasta’ for you??” and you’re like this place downtown is owned by an italian family and it’s the best ill give you the address so you can go and SEE THE LIGHT
  • and jun’s like FINE then ill make you see the light with my favorite pizza place
  • you two are still bickering and the teacher is like “YOU TWO CAN TALK ABOUT PLACES TO EAT FOR YOUR DATE LATER!!!! SILENZO”
  • you and jun slip into your seats grumbling but you’re also like ,,,,did the teacher say date,,,,,,,,,,i wouldnt,,,,,,i mean he’s hot but,,,,,,,,pizza > pasta,,,,,,no
  • and jun, you don’t notice, but he likes peeks over at you and grins because like usually he’ll say something and everyone will flock to him and be like yes!!! you’re right!!! even when he knows they’re differing in opinion but you just seriously argued with him over food and like ….
  • he thought you were cute doing it hehe
  • anyway class ends and you’re getting your things and jun clears his throat and you’re like ??? and he’s like “so the pizza place is pretty close by here. do you want to come with me?” and you’re like
  • “now??” and he’s like “yeah??” and you’re like “um id love to go and disprove you but i have another class so……” and you wave and throw your bag over your shoulder and leave
  • and jun’s like stunned because you legit just shot him down (for good reason but…….) and he grins and he’s like “there’s something about that one. they’re fun.”
  • and the next time you have to come in for italian because admissions is taking 29048 years to switch your schedule jun waves and like points to the seat beside him
  • you like awkwardly go over and he’s like “so, you free after class?” and you’re like ?? and he’s like “i still gotta take you out for pizza.” and you’re like oH right and jun’s like wigging his eyebrows and you shrug because you’re like “maybe. i kinda wanted to get some study time in. ive got this presentation in a week so i cant slack.”
  • and like at the end when it’s over juns like “so lets go!!” and you’re like “sorry i really do need to study, my group chat is like telling me i have to go!! sorry!!!”
  • and jun once again watches you leave but he’s not mad tbh he’s grinning even more because he was right, this is going to be fun
  • and like when you don’t show up to italian the next week because your schedule got fixed jun ends up asking around the whole campus to find out where you might be
  • and like he finds you outside the study hall one day and he’s like “hey!” and you’re like “jun????” and he’s like “you’re hard to find, had me running around the whole campus.” and you’re like “why are you looking for me??” and he’s like “pizza, remember?”
  • and you’re looking at him like seriously, you’re not over that?? and jun’s smiling at you and you’re like “i dont have time now-” and jun’s like “give me your phone. im going to give you my number and just text me when you do  - ok?”
  • and you hesitate but you pass your phone over and he puts his contact in and gives it back and you almost throw it at him because hE SERIOUSLY NAMED HIMSELF “Pizza King *crown emoji* *pizza emoji*” and he winks at you and is like “addio~~”
  • truthfully like you get to wrapped up in your own work that like a month passes and you don’t text jun until one day you like look at your contacts and see the dumb pizza king one and you’re like ………….i have this weekend off so…………..and so you nervously text him like “hey, im free tomorrow at 1?”
  • like ten seconds later: “really? can you meet me outside of the theater on campus?”
  • and you’re like oh my god but you’re like sure!! and that’s how you set up your first date (of many coughs) with wen junhui
  • but it’s hilarious you get to the theater at like 12:50 the next day and you can hear music inside and one of the students tells you that the fashion majors are doing like a practice show
  • and you’re like huh and then at 1 you see someone running toward you and it’s jun and he’s wearing ?? like ??? a full tux ??? and like has makeup on ?? and you’re like UM and he’s like
  • “sorry i was just helping the fashion kids out. sorry i look like this-” but then he stops because he sees how you keep looking down because like the buttoned up part of his tux and tie are undone and you’re kinda red in the face and jun bites his lip and he’s like “you know. ill borrow this clothes for our date.” and you’re like AHGIKFS NO PLEASE CHANGE
  • and you like push him back toward the theater like !! go put on some normal clothes !!!! and he’s laughing because aww you’re cute when you’re embarrassed 
  • he finally agrees to change and comes out looking AMAZING anyway and he’s like “the place is close to campus, don’t worry.” and you two walk there and jun orders you guys his favorite kind of pizza
  • and like you’re waiting and you’re like “why are you studying languages?” and jun like drinks some water and is like “because im not good at anything else.” and you’re like ??? what do you mean and he lets out kind of a bitter laugh and he’s like “people always tell me there’s not much beyond my looks and they’re right. language is all memorization, you don’t need skill.”
  • and you can feel his voice is dripping with like sarcasm and you kind of cringe because as confident as he comes off, is this really what he thinks of himself????
  • and you’re like “you must be crazy, language is the hardest major. you’re learning something you don’t even have basic knowledge of.” and jun’s like what do you mean and you’re like “bio majors know the difference between something alive and dead. it’s common sense. literature majors know whats a real word and whats not, what sentence sounds right and what doesn’t. every major has a platform to start on except foreign languages. double majoring in two is something only a real genius could pull off.”
  • and like you shrug because you feel like you’ve said to much and like you try to distract yourself when the pizza comes but jun watches you and he’s just like “i knew it. i knew it was you.” and you’re like ??? and he just shakes his head and eats his slice
  • the rest of your conversation is like cute and small jun flirts in between asking you questions and you mock him in between answering them but somehow you two like fit together the conversation never dies
  • and by the end you’re like “i have to admit, this is good pizza - but…………pasta owns my heart.”
  • and jun sighs and he’s like “fine, ill give up on pizza owning your heart but how about this’; me or pasta?”
  • and he like leans over to look you in the eyes and you’re like …………..”pasta duh” and he’s like DAMMIT 
  • but you both laugh and he walks you back to your dorm and he’s like “since i took you for some life changing pizza, you owe me life changing pasta.” and you’re like “of course, how about next week?”
  • and jun jumps at the offer like yes. anytime for you. anytime anyplace and you roll your eyes because like as much as you don’t want to admit you like jun. but you cant risk letting him now that because something itches at your mind that he’s probably not the committed type
  • and so you and jun say goodbye and he pulls you back to him when you turn to leave and he’s like “we have to say bye like the italians do.” and he kisses your cheek and grins softly before waving and walking off
  • and you’re like I hate his corny butt BUT DO YOU DO YOU…….
  • the next week you and jun meet up to go to the pasta place you wanted to show him and like on your way there you’re waiting for the train and you hear like a group of boys go bye snickering and pointing at jun and you hear one of them basically call jun a slur and another one says he’s good for nothing but how he looks and like it’s within earshot so it means jun can hear too and so you like
  • immediately take his hand and move him further away down the platform and he’s like “dont worry about me.” but you’re like “jun, is that why you were telling me you’re not good at anything? is it because of what people say?”
  • and he just looks down and tries to smile but you can see it’s hard for him and you’re like “jun, you know theyre just jealous right. that they cant shine confidence like you and that they will never be as smart and capable and kind like you. you know that right?”
  • and you like lift his face so he looks directly at you and he’s like “no one…..no one ever tells me that im doing the right thing. that im doing well-” and you’re like “jun, listen to me, you’re doing amazing. you’re handsome, yeah but you’re a sweet person and you’re incredibly intelligent. don’t take a word they say into consideration ok?”
  • and he chuckles but he nods and you let him go but he pulls you into a tight hug and you’re like jun!!! people can see!!! and he’s like with his head in your neck like let them see i dont care,,,,,
  • once you get to the pasta place you order your favorite dish and like you guys are eating and jun’s like “let’s do the pasta kiss.” and you’re like “jun. no.” and he’s like “………c’mon…….” and you’re like jUN NO and he’s already twirling one end of the pasta on his fork and you’re like aklhfw OK 
  • and it’s cute it’s like the scene from lady and the tramp except you bite off the noodle before jun can and he’s like hey!! and you’re laughing but the second you’re distracted he leans in and steals a kiss and you’re like j U N and he’s like “you wouldn’t do the pasta kiss with me SOOOO”
  • and jun admits at the end that the pasta might be slightly better than the pizza but only because there was a kiss involved and you’re like god you’re so greasy and he’s like “just like pizza (;”
  • everyone knows you and jun started dating because the night of the pasta date he made you two take a selfie outside the resturant and when you woke up it was all over SNS and your roommate was practically yelling in your ear like YOURE DATING WEN JUNHUI PRINCE OF TRACK TEAM ITALIAN SPEAKING HEARTTHROB
  • and you roll over like let Me sLEEp but yes im dating him 
  • you dont have many classes with him but you meet up inbetween and his friends minghao and hoshi are like “break up with jun. you think he’s a flirt before you dated him, now it’s just gonna be worse.” and you’re like looking at jun whose got his arm around you and keeps making hearts with his fingers and you’re like “yeah……..i know what i signed up for.”
  • you complimented hoshi’s shirt once and jun was like “should i buy one just like it?” and you’re like oh my god chill
  • jun likes it when he’s kissing you and complimenting you in italian and you’re like giggling but you’re like !! what are you saying what does it mean!!! and he’s just kissing your neck calling you cute things and saying sweet nothings and he just likes seeing you get all red
  • took you to french film club with him and you were like “jun, this movie doesn’t have subtitles?” and he’s like ‘don’t worry ill live translate” but all he kept saying was how cute you looked and how much he loved you against your ear the entire movie (the head of the club kicked you guys out 15 min in)
  • he likes having you sit like between his legs with your back to his chest especially if you guys are like chilling somewhere with friends or like at your dorm like you’ll be typing on your laptop and he’ll be like sitting against the wall on your bed and he’s like “sit in my lap” and you’re like “jun” and he’s like “please, it’s sad if we’re in the same room and im not like holding you.”
  • jun the type to triple text you good mornings + send a selfie of himself like “look at me. your beautiful boyfriend. you’re so lucky!” LOL
  • jun talks about you so much and like even fore a class he was supposed to recite something in italian only and he recited all the reason he liked you and the teacher was like jesus christ
  • you spend a week trying to learn a phrase in italian for jun and it’s something like “you’re very special to me.” and when you tell it to him he throws his arms around you and is just like im so in love goD
  • you guys still argue over ordering pizza or pasta when you stay in and minghao, jun’s roommate always has to be the icebreaker or he’s like “you two are so loud just get BOTH”
  • jun kisses you in the middle of your sentences and it gets so bad you have to like cover his mouth while you’re saying something because it’s cute i love you jun but GIVE ME ONE SECOND TO BREATH
  • makes out with you against walls and you get shy because like he leaves you breathless and it’ll be like against the wall of the library and freshman walk by and giggle and you’re like ahsdgikw with your face in his chest and he just laughs and fixes your hair 
  • you go to his track meets and jun wears like a headband in his hair and he looks sooooo good in the uniform and like he always teases you by sending kisses to you from the field and you’re like sTOP but he wont 
  • you like pass him water from the bleachers and kiss his forehead and jun is like “if i win- we’re getting pizza the next time you come over.” and you like push him away playfully and he grabs your hand and kisses the top of it and idk it’s cute yall are cute
  • jun in italian: you look good 
  • you: i cant understand you
  • jun: love is a universal language
  • you: im gonna smack you with this book

find college!vixx (here) & college!bts (here)
find college!woozi (here),  college!wonwoo (here) college!seunghceol (here) & college!seokmin (here) 
find special college!jb (here)
and please look forward to more college!seventeen + special college!aus

Dementia: Bro, I’m deadass hungry right now.
Flug: Ya pizza! What you want?
Dementia: Lemme get uhhhhhhhhhh boneless pizza with a 2 liter of coke.
Flug: Fuck kind of pizza? And 2 liter machine broke we got 1 liter though.
Dementia: Fuck you mean B? Aight look, lemme get that pizza boneless. 
Flug: Uh? Pizza don’t got bone on it.
Dementia: The fuck did i just say then?
Flug: You said, “lemme get it boneless,” like pizza got a damn bone in it. 
Dementia: Y’all got bones in ya shit then.
Flug: Nah! 
Dementia: So what’s the problem? 
Flug: DICK HEAD. Name one pizza that got bone on it
Dementia: Just don’t put them shits in my pizza bruh. How many times I gotta say it?
Flug: Bruh just explain to me how the fuck pizza can be boneless?
Dementia: If it don’t got bone in it, it’s boneless.
Flug: Son, what school you go to? 
Dementia: Dawg i don’t understand the problem. Just make my shit boneless. Deadass.
Flug: I’m deadass not making this pizza.

bro im deadass 👊❗️❗️hungry 🍿🍧🎂🍩 right now 🌶🌶 ya pizza 🍕🍕 wat u want??? 👨 lemme get uhh 🅱ONELESS PIZZA 🍕🍕 wit a 2⃣liter of coke 🍾🍾 FUCK 🗣 KIND OF PIZZA 🍕🍕 AND ✊ 2⃣liter machine 🅱roke 🖐 but we got 1⃣liter doe ❗️❗️ FUCK YOU MEAN 🤔🅱 IGHT LOOK 👀 LEMME GET DAT 👊🍕🍕 🅱ONELESS ??? uhhh ??? 🍕🍕🍕 dont got bones on em 🖐 ❌❌ 🙏 the FUCK 🤔 did i just 🗣🗣🗣 say then ??? U SAID 🗣🗣 LEMME GET IT 🅱ONELESS 👨🍳👨🍳 LI PIZZA GOTTA DAMN 🅱ONE IN IT 😤😤 yaii got bones 💀 in ya shit then 😩😩👊 NAH 😒 whats the problem ??? ☣☣😋 DICKHEAD 🍆🍆 name 1⃣ pizza 🍕🍕 dat got 🅱ONE in it 😒 JUST DONT 🙅🙅 PUT THOSE SHITS ✊ IN MY PIZZA 🅱RUH ❗️❗️❗️ how many times ⌚️⌚️ do i have to say it 🗣🗣 🅱RUH just explain 🗣🗣 to me how tHE FUCK 🙋🙋 pizza 🍕🍕 can be 🅱ONELESS ❗️❗️❗️ if it dont got 🅱ONE in it 🙋 ISS 🅱ONELESS 👊 son 👦 wat school you go 🏃🏃 to DAWG ⁉️ i dont understand the 😩 problem 😒✊ just make my shit ☣🅱ONELESS DEADASS ☣🍆 im deadass ❌ not making this pizza 🍕🍕 🅱

anonymous asked:

I absolutely looooved the one with the Hydra girl who was trained under the Winter Soldier!!!!! Could you please please do more?!?!?!?


More than a thousand feet in the air, they have their picnic  — a spread of cheeses, fruits and ice cream on a blanket they stole from Stark as they viewed the city. Any lower and it wouldn’t be theirs.

“He tried to teach me dancing.” She stabs into her carton of mint chocolate. 

Steve snorts. “I thought you grew up ballet.”

 “He taught me the jitterbug.”

Steve bursts out laughing at that, jolting her from the comfortable spot on his shoulder. “Oh, lord, tell me JARVIS recorded that.”

“Maybe,” she replies, smiling. 

“He threw out all seven of my omelets!” Tony jumps, hitting the overhead light and she flinches. “Sorry! But fuck! He didn’t even eat them, Tony!” She moves the light out of the way and rubs his head where he hit it. 

Tony flails for a moment before sighing. “I told you he was a pretentious asshole.” He grabs her hands and pulls them away from his head. “I’m fine. Thanks.”

She smiles. “He’s the best. I wanted to learn from him.”

“French cuisine isn’t the only cuisine in the world. I know great Mexican chef who’d happy to teach you or North Indian or Chinese or —”

“I don’t want to quit,” she interrupts. “I don’t like to quit. I just…”

“You want to prove him wrong,” he finishes, his eyes alight with knowing. She nods. “And that’s fine, but to an extent. You have to know that sometimes, you won’t get to do that. You should be able to move on. Got it?”

“Got it. Thanks, Tony.” She presses a kiss to his cheek and runs out of the labs. 

Wednesday mornings found them Bruce’s room, greeting the rising sun with apanasana. Sometimes Sam joins them, but mostly, it is the four of them in the bright living room, all furniture pushed to the side. She is not sure who first joined Bruce during his yoga sessions (her bet is on Nat), but soon, this has become routine. They tried roping in the others once. Never again.

“Can you start cutting the fruits?”

Bucky nods and grabs all the fruits from the fridge as well as the few on the table. While his murdery knife skills are legendary, somehow his kitchen knife skills are even better. He dices all the fruits into bite-size bits and reaches over Steve, who is flipping the pancakes, bacon and french toast  — and no, she is not imagining the extra touching and resting going on over there.

When Bucky turns around to put all the fruits into the even larger container to be properly mixed, she waggles her eyebrows at him. The only reply she gets is a heavy and silent sigh. 

“Steve and Bucky are totally dating, aren’t they?”

Pepper and Darcy hum in agreement that trails off in a moan and she would have to agree. Massages and facials are the best. 

“I mean, like, they should be,” Darcy adds. “I don’t know if they are yet. It’s been too long since I’ve been at the Tower.”

“You say it like it’s a bad thing,” she replies. 

“It’s not. I love Jane, but spending months in the middle of nowhere is exhausting.”

“It’s peaceful,” Nat counters.

“Depends on where it is, I think,” Helen says. She agrees.

“Aww, I love you too, Darce,” Jane pipes up from the far left. 

Betty laughs. “Is Thor okay with that?”

“Oh, he better be,” Darcy replies. “Jane was mine first.” 

The women dissolve into giggles. 

“Your dog stole my pizza,” she says in lieu of a greeting. 

A slight crackle zings through the connection as Clint sighs. “I told you he would. What did the vet say?”

“That he’s fine. That I shouldn’t give him more pizza.”

“He loves pizza.”

“Jesus, Clint, tell your dog to get his shit together.”

“There’s a reason we’re perfect for each other, ya know…”

Now it’s her turn to sigh. 

Kukui and Ash Prank-call Mallow
  • Mallow: Ya pizza what u want?
  • Kukui: Lemme get uhhhhhhhhhh boneless pizza with a 2 liter of coke
  • Mallow: Fuck kind of pizza?? and 2 liter machine broke we got 1 liter tho
  • Kukui: Fuck u mean B aight look lemme get that pizza boneless!
  • Mallow: Uh? Pizza dont got bone on it..
  • Kukui: The Fuck did i just say then?
  • Mallow: You said, lemme get it boneless like pizza got a damm bone in it!
  • Kukui: Y'all got bones in ya shit then nah so whats the problem?
  • Mallow: DICK HEAD name one pizza that got bone on it!
  • Kukui: Just dont put them shits in my pizza bruh how many times I gotta say it?
  • Mallow: Bruh just explain to me how the fuck pizza can be boneless?
  • Kukui: If it don't got bone in it it's boneless
  • Mallow: Bruh, what school u go to?
  • Kukui: Cousin I don't understand the problem just make my shit boneless!
My seacon sns adventure!

So as a joke i snap chatted jason manns saying i was coming straight from work did he want pizza and he said yes please. So i take a a couple pizzas but he’s in sound check so i had to give to someone from creation who is drilling me about it like I’m smuggling in a bomb or something.

He hits me up saying sorry and he wanted to come get it to say thank you and he will try and find me after.

So it’s after he isn’t responding so i make it all the way to my car and he’s like where are you! So i go back and he gives me terrible directions and no-one from creation believes I’m supposed to be there so i go back to the stage and tell him to find me.

Norton is off to the side and i am staring a little bit and he sees me and says my name and calls me over. Take selfies but my phone won’t load the camera so I’m just standing with his arm around me while he laughs at my frustration.

Manns comes out and says hi with obligatory small talk and billy comes up and calls me the pizza girl takes selfies with me and says was delicious and thanks.

We are all walking out together and then robs right in front of me so i ask for a pic and his handlers say no. He grins all mischievous and says he can do one better.
Ducks around the handlers and gives me a bear hug.

What is my life? I almost didn’t go. Best night ever. Also mike was there the whole time but i forgot to take a pic because i suck

Originally posted by natpekis

Dating Bucky Barnes would include…

  • Bucky confiding in Steve when he starts to get these weird feelings around you 
    • The man hasn’t had a lovey-dovey relationship since the 40s and he’s fucking terrified each time his heart about leaps out of his chest when he’s near you
  • Natasha and Wanda cornering him and letting him know that if he breaks your heart, there will be hell to pay
  • Sam constantly teasing Bucky about his crush on you
    • Let’s face it, everyone would be teasing poor Buck about it
  • You being so confused when Tony stars asking you what you look for in a life partner and you just randomly blurt out “man buns”
    • Bucky walking around the corner with - wait for it - a man bun and backpedaling to go quickly tell Steve he puts his hair up in a bun all the time
  • After months and months of pining after you, he finally gets the damn courage to ask you out
  • He goes to Clint for help because Clint’s been in plenty of stable relationships and he doesn’t trust Steve with this because Steve would just be so happy for his best friend and then forget all about what Bucky came to him for
  • “Dude, just ask ‘em. Nothing has to be fancy about it. If you’re gonna propose, that’s a whole different area and you’ll want Times Square for that shit”
  • And Bucky does
  • And you say yes
  • Everyone can hear Bucky’s whooping throughout the entire tower before he realizes you hadn’t left the room
    • “oh my god he’s so cute and oh my god he asked me out and fuck, did I say yes? DID I REMEMBER TO SAY YES?”
  • Your first date is pizza and a walk through the park
  • He kept apologizing for such a shitty date but he couldn’t think straight because holy fuck you said yes
    • “We haven’t even gone anywhere yet, Buck”
    • “We haven’t?”
    • “Nope and I’d like to. I think Tony’s close to giving us “the talk” and I would very much like to skip that”
  • You two get to the pizza parlor and opt for a back corner booth
  • Bucky’s fidgeting the entire time - he’s nervous as fuck and he is sweating like crazy
    • He also sees the way some of the other people are eyeing him
    • You reach over and grab his hand, sending him a soft smile
    • “Don’t focus on your surroundings for once, Bucky”
    • And he didn’t - he just kept staring at your beautiful smile and the way your eyes crinkled when you laughed and they’re so gorgeous
  • The walk through the park is so peaceful and the stars are shining so brightly and the moon is out in full
  • All he can think about is kissing you but that gentleman in him is screaming it’s too soon and -
    • Your face is right in front of his and you’re grinning at him
    • He can’t help himself and cups your face in his hands, bringing your lips to his, for once forgetting about his metal arm
  • “I was wondering when you’d do that”
  • After that, there isn’t a day that goes by when you two aren’t attached by the hip
  • He always has an arm around you; he likes to know that you’re still there
  • So much cuddling - like, so much
  • He’s such a good cuddler
  • He just holds you close and your hands are always intertwined
  • It took a while for him to open up enough for the two of you to sleep in the same bed
  • He was afraid you’d run at his screams and thrashing during his nightmares
  • But you didn’t - you’d coax him awake by peppering kisses all over his face, offering to talk about it when he finally woke up to your worried face
    • “You don’t - it’s not something you should know”
    • “All right, Buck. Just know I’m here when you’re ready, okay? I’m always here for you.”
  • He still doesn’t like letting you touch his arm, even though you assured him he could never hurt you
  • Sam and Tony love messing with him and would occasionally flirt with you just to see Bucky tick
    • They keep forgetting how bad of an idea that is
    • Tony received two broken fingers and a black eye
    • Sam could not find Redwing anywhere and discovered it, a broken mess, hanging outside the door to his room
    • You don’t think you ever saw Bucky grin so wildly before at Sam’s anguished screams
  • “What’s a graphics card, doll? Why do you need it? And what the hell is with all the damn acronyms?”
  • “Doll, I am not cutting my hair just so you can see what I looked like in the 40s. There are pictures everywhere!”
    • “But it’s not the same!”
  • You’re always worried about him when he goes out on solo missions and are constantly asking Steve and Maria for updates
  • Bucky always watching out for you when the two of you go on missions together
    • “On your right, darlin’”
    • “You might wanna duck, doll, that guy’s been staring at your ass and I’ve had just about enough of it”
    • “But we’re technically the enemy here; aren’t they supposed to be shooting at me?”
    • “You have a really nice ass and I am the only one allowed to stare”
  • You catch Bucky training one day and his metal arm is exposed and you’re just so transfixed
  • That night he doesn’t sleep with a sweatshirt on and he sits for a while as you come out of the bathroom
    • “Something wrong, Bucky?”
    • “I’m…do you want to…?”
  • And of course you want to touch his metal arm - you had been waiting until he finally felt comfortable enough with you and you can’t help the giant grin
  • You’re just so happy and so proud of how far he’s come with his past and you rush to him, tackling him in a hug
  • Then things turn serious and you’re holding his metal hand and you bring it to your lips, planting kisses to each finger before kissing a trail to his scars before you place your lips on his
    • “It makes me so happy that you not only trust me, but you trust your own control now, Buck. I love you”
  • He doesn’t know what to do at first; he’s so shocked to hear those three words from you and you see the tears brimming at the corner of his eyes 
    • “I love you too, (Y/N)”
  • It’s the first night the two of you take things farther
  • Clothes are shed and lips are everywhere and his name is a mantra on your lips and shit he’s yours
  • He can’t get over the fact that this is real and it’s not some horrible dream he’d wake up from and as your nails rake down his back he breathes your name and - shit they’re mine

Requested by @poe-also-bucky

This got so out of hand. Like, this is so long. Sooo long but I had so much fun writing this and I can’t help myself when it comes to Bucky. 

Part 2

anonymous asked:

😱Bruh😱 I'm 🍑deadass🍑 😋hungry😋 right 🕑now🕑... Ya 🍕pizza😍🍕 what u 😍want😍? lemme get➡ 🤔🤔uhhhhhhhhh🤔🤔🤔 🚫🍖 B O N E L E S S 🍖🚫 🍕pizza🍕🍕 with a 2 liter of 🥃coke🥃... 💦😩Fuck💦😩 kinda 🍕pizza🍕? And 2 🚰liter🚰 📠machine📠📠 broke 😩Fuck😩 u mean 🅱️ Ight 👀look👀 lemme 📨get📨 that 🍕pizza🍕 🚫🍖 B O N E L E S S 🍖🚫 uh 🍕pizza🍕 don't got ☠️bone☠️ on it The 👉👌fuck👉👌 did 👉i👈 just 💬say💬 then? 👆U👆 🗯said🗯 Lemme get it 🚫🍖boneless🍖🚫 Like 🍕pizza🍕🍕 got a 💢damn🙊

part 1


Tim stopped halfway down the hall. He hadn’t exactly been avoiding the open door, but he hadn’t said anything on his way past either. You had to be careful with Damian, or at least Tim did. He wasn’t sure he was welcome.

“Drake?” Well, he was busted now.

Tim leaned against the doorframe. “Hey.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I was looking for Bruce.” 

“He went to a meeting.”

“Oh.” Alright, what was he supposed to do now? It’s not like he could just leave.

“So, um… What’s going on?” Damian’s room was a mess— all of his clothes were stacked in piles on the floor, and his desk was sitting on it’s side. One of the ceiling panels was hanging open.

“I’m rearranging it,” Damian told him. “I could feel all of your hands on my stuff.”

“Well you were kind of dead.”

“I noticed, Drake, thank you.” Damian pulled open one of his drawers and snatched out a pile of papers. “Father won’t be home until dark.”

“I guess I’ll wait. Do you want you want a hand with that?” Tim asked, gesturing to the upturned desk. Damian was headed to his closet, but he stopped long enough to raise an eyebrow and lift the desk with one hand.

“I think I’m good.”

“Right. I forgot about… that. Sorry.”

Damian shrugged. “Pass me those books?”

“Sure, where do you want them?”

Damian tapped the bookshelf beside him and kept on rummaging through his closet. He pulled a spare blanket from one of the corners— when he threw it behind him, it hit the floor in a puff of dust, making them both cough. 

“Damn,” Damian muttered, “Pennyworth should be ashamed.” He was on his tiptoes, stretching for the top shelf, but he couldn’t reach far enough. “Can you get me that storage box?”

“I thought you had it covered.”

Damian sighed. “Father says I’m not allowed to fly in the house. Stop smiling, Drake. It isn’t funny.”

Okay, but it kind of was. What with all the fighting the two of them did, sometimes Tim had trouble remembering how young Damian was. But wow, he was small. Tiny. He couldn’t reach high shelves, and he wasn’t allowed to fly because his dad told him no. That was adorable. Of course, Tim knew better than to actually say it out loud because Tim wasn’t an idiot. 

“Drake! Box.”

“Right, sorry. Do you want the canvas on top?”

“Canvas? What— no. Leave it.”

“Can I see?”


“Alright, fine. Wait, are you okay?” Damian was crouched in front of his bookshelf, very interested in his stack of novels. “Damian?”

“Of course I’m okay.”

“Damian, are you crying?”

I said I’m fine.”

But he clearly wasn’t? What the hell? “Damian, what’s going on?”

“Get out of my room, Drake.”

“Okay, now I’m definitely looking,” Tim told him, reaching for the canvas.


“Now what have we got over— oh god, Damian, I’m so sorry—”

It was a half-finished painting with a photograph paper-clipped to the corner: Damian and Dick sitting at the kitchen table. Dick was holding a piece of Damian’s toast, and Damian was reaching for it. They were both laughing.

“Was this for him?”

Damian looked up from his shelf— He really was crying. “It was supposed to be a Christmas present,” he mumbled. “But then I died and he died and I—just leave me alone.”

What should he do? The hell if he knew, he couldn’t handle something like this, not when it was Damian. Damian hated him. What a nightmare.

“Hey.” He sat down on the floor. “I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have looked. You were right.”

Damian pulled his knees up to his chest and buried his head in his arms. “I’m always right.”

“Most of the time, yeah. Listen, I don’t really know what to tell you about… you know, except— I mean, I can’t promise you anything, but— you were dead too.”

“I noticed, Drake, thank you.”

“And so was Jason. And we thought Bruce was dead that one time. Well, you guys did anyway.”

“Do you have a point?”

“I’m just saying that you’re all back now. And I don’t see why Dick should be an exception, okay? At this point, it’s statistically unlikely.”

“Because heaven forbid one of us should die permanently, like a normal person.”

“C’mon, we both know that if that’s going to be anyone, it’ll be me.”


“Oh my god, Damian. We can look into it, okay? We’ll figure something out.”

Downstairs, the door slammed. Damian looked up, resting his chin on his knees. “You found my cave,” he said, jabbing a thumb at the ceiling.

“Bruce did.”

“Did Grayson get his package?”

“Yeah.” Tim smiled. “He called me about it because he was so excited. He thought it was really funny.”

Damian nodded. “You like pizza, right?” Tim asked. “You want to go get a pizza?”

“What, with you?”

“Um, yeah, that was the idea. We can get Jason to come too. That’s probably him downstairs—he said he was going to drop by.”

Jason stuck his head in the door. “Did somebody say pizza?”

“There, see? Speak of the devil.”

“I heard that,” Jason told him, “and it was rude. You should be ashamed.”

“Uh huh.” Tim turned back to Damian. “Pizza? Yes? No?”

“Fine,” Damian said. “As long as Todd comes. I’m not going anywhere alone with you.”

“If there’s pizza, I’m in. The hell did you do to your room?”

“He’s cleaning,” Tim told him, as he offered Damian a hand. “Come on. If we hurry, we can be back before Bruce.” 

Damian took his hand, and Tim helped him up. “Thanks,” Damian said. He brushed past Tim on his way to the door. “But I still hate you.”

Right. Of course he did.

part 2

part 3

part 4