did he seriously just say that

  • me: they hurt me!! I'm gonna be distant! that'll show them!
  • them: hey
  • me: hey 💘💓💖💕💓💞💕💗💝💓💞💝💘💕💕💖💗💘💕💞💘💘💖💗💘💞💕💞💞💕💘💕💖💗💖💕💞💞💖💖💗💖💘💞💫
100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

"Back in my day we didn't have all these mental issues!"

Well yes you did, Karen. They were called “Problem children” or “retards” or “psychos”. The were thrown in institutions and treated like criminals, or beaten to curb their behavior, or publicly shamed as “dunces”. They lacked adequate healthcare and no one understood what was wrong with them. They wandered the streets while their families either struggled to take care of them or pretended they didn’t exist. I know because I have an aunt who grew up schizophrenic in the 50s. You think anyone really knew how to deal with her when she wandered away from home or said and did bizarre things? And then there was my uncle, likely suffering from PTSD caused by his military service when he threw himself over a waterfall.

The increased ability to identify and diagnose things doesn’t mean these things just started existing. I’m not saying society doesn’t tend to overdiagnose and overmedicate (if you raise your kid with absolutely no boundaries or discipline and they end up a horrible brat, that’s probably not because of some rare mental disorder so much as bad parenting), but stop dismissing every mental health issue as some newfangled millennial nonsense you don’t have to take seriously. And don’t let that mindset stop YOU from getting help if you need it.

A few more thoughts on Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (yeah, I have a lot of them): while I totally get the rush of “galaxy’s best dad!/Yondu did nothing wrong in his life!” posts and fanart (I do! honestly! Michael Rooker did an amazing job) that’s just… not the story I think the movie is telling, or the story I really want it to be telling. James Gunn is at it too, what with him basically saying “Well, Peter wasn’t a great son either!” in that Q&A he did…

…Yondu was an absolutely abusive parent, yeah? He loved Peter a lot in his own equally-abused way, but he was. Peter even says it, when Yondu demands a prize for basic decency in the first movie “Normal people don’t even think about eating anybody else, let alone that person having to be grateful for it!” He doesn’t know Yondu was never planning to seriously hurt him, he just knows that he pretty much grew up under the constant threat of violence (no matter how ordinary that apparently seems to be for Ravagers.) There were presumably some nice moments every now and again, since Peter does have a clear, maybe rather begrudging affection for him, but yeah, the point: at the beginning of the Guardians films Yondu’s not even deserving of a World’s Okayest Dad mug, let alone a World’s Greatest Dad one.

But that’s why his storyline in GOTG2 is so satisfying, and hits all the tropes I love in a redemption arc, because it’s entirely about Yondu realising just how utterly, utterly he fucked up (with both Peter and the other kids he unwittingly delivered to their deaths) and setting out to try and make up for it, even if that means dying basically unmourned (as Stakar told him) and unloved. When he’s with the others on Ego’s planet, it’s obvious from his words to Rocket that he doesn’t intend to leave it at all, but rather stay and try to regain some remnants of his honour by helping to kill the thing that killed his adopted son’s siblings.

And I love the “[Ego] may have been your father but he wasn’t your daddy” line, I think everyone does, but those would have been terribly disappointing and selfish last words. I don’t think Yondu was talking about himself, it’s just a simple affirmation to make Peter feel better, what matters is the apology he makes afterwards. “I’m sorry I didn’t do none of it right, I was lucky you were my boy.” Not a plea for forgiveness, just a flat-out statement really: Peter deserved better than him. All he can do is die to keep Peter alive and hold his face when he cries and hope that that’s enough.

…..And that’s just, such a much more interesting story than “he was secretly good all along.”

Bts reaction to you liking rough sex

Reaction:  Hi! What about BTS reacting to you wanting them to be so rough with you you’re covered in bruises and bitemarks? Thanks! I really love your blog!

I want to warn you that by bruising I don’t mean domestic violence or anything. I mean both party agree, sexual kink. 


Seokjin

Jin won’t be too much into this. He’ll occasionally mark your body when he haven’t been home for long or was in an angry mode. There was no way, he’ll leave bruises on your masterpiece of a body. I think he’ll be just afraid. But if his mood matches your request, girl…you are in deep trouble. You won’t be able to sit.

Originally posted by syubbie

Yoongi

He is Agust D with the tongue technology for a god damn reason. Boy will cover your body in hickies and bites, the moment you tell him that it excites you. He also loves to destroy you mentally while doing so phisicaly. So while he was making you, there was a significant dirty talk attached to it. “Whimper baby. Let me hear those sweet sounds. I’ll record them for a song next time.” 

Originally posted by yoongixjimin

Namjoon

You want to die or something? I mean he is daddy enough. Let’s leave it like this. You won’t need to ask him. He knows where to bite, where to suck and where to demolish. Like seriously. You won’t be able to say anything from the pleasure it brings you. You’ll scream and beg and cry from overhelming pleasure, but he’ll just smile and ask “Isn’t that what you wanted? Daddy only does what his princess asked him to.”

Originally posted by simondismydaddy

Hoseok

He’ll be hesitent at first. But you encouraged him to try suck a hickey on your neck for starters and he did. One, two,three, then he slowly started biting and you made sweet sounds he never heard before, which excites him to unbelievable extents. So he continued on and on. Kissing and sucking. Biting and growling.

Originally posted by yourpinkpill

Jimin

He won’t say anything. He’ll just do it. Maybe on every three marks he’ll ask if you are alright, but seeing you with closed eyes waiting for him to touch you, will make him wanna continue his little painting on a real canvas. “Y/N, tell me if you want me to stop, because if you don’t I don’t gurantee you’ll be fine tomorrow.”

Originally posted by kookies-for-taehyung

Taehyung

It was his kink before it was yours.It was somehow mutual. He had no problems marking your body, because you didn’t need to go out in front of thousand cameras. And he marked you so nicely that no foundation could hide those purple marks. Yet, something excited him about you making marks on his body. The thrill if anyone is going to notice them, if the make-up stylists would be able to hide them. So, it was a game for both of you.

Originally posted by jiminiemini

Jungkook

He got the idea fast. When you asked him if he’ll be able to do it, Jungkook only laughed, carried you bridial and threw on the bed. Fast he attached his lips to the crook of your neck. It felt so good that you lost yourself in it. Lost you moaned your lovers name and low growling errupted his chest. “You really do enjoy this, little naughty naughty girl. And this only the first one. WHat are you going to do when Daddy is done with you.”

Originally posted by fcktaekook


Request are open for reactions and MTL’s

Masterlist

I have some opinions/thoughts that I’d really love to get off my chest even if other people think I’m completely wrong.

Gaston did not deserve to die, Gaston was hardly a bad person, Gaston was basically forced into being the villian of this story.

[I’m referring to the 2017 remake of BATB rather than the original animation.]

Let’s point out some difference between the 1991 Gaston and 2017 Gaston
-2017 Gaston was not a misogynist
-did not abuse Lefou
-even verbally
-Like for fucksakes, the friendship between Lefou and Gaston was so genuine. I’m frequently seeing these things around Gafou is an abusive ship, buts it’s really not? He tells Lefou ‘thank you’ says ‘you’re the best Lefou’ sincerely asks ‘how has no woman snatched you up?’, messes around with Lefou like buds (wrestling bite marks, picking him up to demonstrate strength, gets on the table and dances with him), let’s Lefou calm him down and boop his nose, and not once does he insult or hurt even when it seemed like he would (after Lefou wrapped his arms around him, or when he couldn’t spell his name, when he said ‘who needs her when you’ve got us’, etc). They’re sincerely good, close friends, but don’t worry I’m not ignoring all the shitty things Gaston did to Lefou I will get to that in a second.
-I said he’s not a misogynist, right? Cause that’s important. Big step away from the OG.
-Doesn’t insult Belle for reading
-Instead he feigns interest in the book because he knows it’s her interest
-even brings her flowers, whataguy
-Has manners (“excuse me, please let me through” going through the crowd, didn’t push everyone out of his way)
-Goes to her rescue when the town’s people are being mean (sure this is because he wanted to be the hero to seduce her, but seriously he was one of the few people who didn’t harass or bully Belle for being different)
-Doesn’t call Maurice crazy and instead offers his help to soothe the men (again, seduction, but seriously he’s still being polite and helping the underdog unlike the OG)

I’ll probably think of more things to add to this Gaston-wasnt-an-asshole list but I think this basically gets the point across that, well, Gaston wasn’t an asshole. He was immensely vain, yes, but that doesn’t mean he was a bad person.
Cus ya know who else started out incredibly vain but still managed to be the fucking prince in this story?
Yep, the Beast/Adam of course.

Time to do some comparing of the prince and the villian because spoiler alert, they basically parallel each other.

I’ll begin this part with Belle’s comment of, “No one can change THAT much, Gaston”
Ahem

LITERALLY SHUT THE FUCK UP ARE YOU SERIOUS
This line pissed me off immensely, because that’s literally Adam’s entire character arc, changing himself completely, literally and figuratively.

Like I’m sorry you wanna do a repeat of the song “Something there” aka the song where the lyrics are basically “he was an asshole brute who I hated but now he’s c h a n g e d”
Literally so pissed off at that all.

But as I was saying, Gaston basically mirrors Adam’s arc, meaning to say they’re practically the same character things going on but sorta reversed.

Like okay
-Upon first meeting Belle, the Beast locks her father then her in a tower and is a huge dick but then they bond over books and he gives her flowers and he’s nice to her.
-Upon first interacting with Belle, Gaston is nice to her, gives her flowers, tries to bond over books, but then he’s a huge dick and locks her father and then her in a cart.

Do you see what I did there? Literally the same actions, but backwards.

Let’s do some more comparing.
-They both have terrible, terrible tempers.
But you know what? The Beasts is definitely a lot worse than Gaston’s.

Let’s review how both Gaston and Adam dealt with Belle’s dinner rejection
-Beast: literally motherfucking demands she has dinner with him, bangs his paws on the door, scrEAMS at her, and then announces she can starve if she won’t eat with him
-Gaston: [not direct quotes, can’t remember exact words but basically what he says] “oh, busy?” nope “okay, then some other time?” boom that’s that. Yeah he still is persistent on winning her over even after this rejection but the man handled it a lot better then Adam (and he brought flowers for her dinner table).

I’m about to move on from Adam and start talking about how Gaston treated Lefou in a sec, but I would just really really really like to put some emphasis on the fact that both Adam and Gaston were incredibly narcissistic men. The amount of self pride and conceded they have is in the beginning is completely parallel and it leads to both of their unfortunate fates. The point in this, is Gaston is not a bad guy just because he loves himself a bit much, just as the Beast was not a bad guy for loving himself too much. Like, the way Adam turns down Agatha for being ugly seems exactly like something Gaston would do, so why does the movie end with Gaston dying while the Beast learns his lesson and gets his happily ever after?
Because, the OG Gaston was truly an asshole who deserved to die and this 2017 remake of course had to stay true to the story. Even though this Gaston really wasn’t a true villian and didn’t deserve to die – rather he deserves a redemption arc just as Adam was given – he died anyway because that’s how the story goes.

Anyway, I’ll get on with this and bring back Lefou.

Some of you have probably been reading this while thinking “But Marley [das my name], Gaston was a shitty person, he wasn’t a good friend to Lefou at all because he manipulated him, let him get punched in the face, didn’t protect him at all, and threatened to lock him up. Plus, he was only into Belle because she’s pretty.”

Alright alright alright: Lefou.
He’s an exceedingly important character as he gives us insight to Gaston’s character.
Two crucial things he reveals about Gaston … .

-Gaston has anger issues. My father has anger issues, and so do I, and we both are on meds for it. Let me say, having anger management problems and getting angry are very different things. It’s just like he having anxiety and getting nervous are very different things. I think most of you can probably relate or understand anxiety more then anger issues, so just put yourself in Gaston’s shoes with that in mind. Anyway, back to Lefou. He shows us that Gaston has anger issues when he rushes to Gaston’s aid by saying “deep breathes” and then “think about the war”. He tells us that Gaston has coping mechanisms for when he gets like this. Does it matter if Gaston has anger problems? Does it make him less of a dick? Like, seriously Marley, does this information really make up for any of the things he did? Yes, yes it does matter. It’s like when you/someone your love is having an anxiety attack, or when you fall into a depressive episode, or when a loved one acts out of PTSD [which Gaston could totally completely have], or when someone with schizophrenia or delusions starts having episodes, it’s basically exactly like whenever anyone’s mental illness starts to act up. You don’t feel like yourself and you don’t so things you would normally​ do. This is definitely the case for Gaston; he acts out of character when he gets angry like this. And that’s my second point that Lefou proves in this movie.

-Gaston is not being himself when he starts doing all that terrible shit that leads him to his demise. Lefou makes it fairly obvious that that is not how Gaston usually acts. He does this in numerous ways which I will quickly try to summarize and go through:
1) Questions Gaston. Obviously if Gaston often tied up old men to trees or in general left people to die, Lefou would have just went with it instead of going “are you sure?”
2) doesn’t immediately lie to save Gaston’s ass. Again, if Gaston frequently had Lefou lie for him, then it would have came to Lefou like second nature and he wouldn’t have hesitated.
3) Once more, questioning Gaston. The scene I’m about to refer to is when Gaston locks Belle and her father in the carriage. Lefou grabs Gaston’s arm and goes to question him again, but before he can Gaston threatens to lock him up as well. Dick move on Gastons end, no? But this isn’t something he would normally do or say to Lefou, for if it was Lefou wouldn’t have bothered speaking up because he would have known what Gaston’s reaction would be. Instead, Lefou is used to being able to talk sense into Gaston and reason with him (refer back to nose boop scene).
4) Running to Gaston’s side for protection during the fight [castle scene]. Lefou is probably used to having Gaston protect him during fights (war time) and obviously didn’t expect Gaston to throw him to the enemy. Like, yous guys heard him shriek Gaston’s name before the piano fell on him, right? He was obviously expecting Gaston to rescue him. Even after he’s trapped under the piano, he still reaches and calls out for Gaston. The way Gaston is acting is not the Gaston he knows.
5?) “I was on Gaston’s side, but we are so in a bad place right now” [however he says it you know the line I’m referring to]. Aight I think this is the one line that really captures the point I’m trying to make. Lefou has switched sides because Gaston is being a major douchebag and Lefou’s not having it. Lefou doesn’t put up with being treated like shit [MrsPotts saying he deserves better and Lefou agreeing]. So o b v i o u s l y Lefou is not used to Gaston being so cruel and angry. If Gaston treated Lefou like this all the time, then Lefou wouldn’t be by his side [because he left his side once he started acting like this]. Lefou knows how he should be treated, and how he’s being treated is not what he’s used to.
You dig what I’m saying? I’m kinda rushing through these points because I’m getting tired of this.

*deep breathe* Alright, last point, as I mentioned above, ‘Gaston only wanted Belle because she was beautiful’ Alright alright alright I’m not even going to talk about the Gaston in this point, I’m just going to talk about the huge flaw that is Beauty and the Beast.

Adam is turned into the Beast because he needs to learn to not judge people by how they look, he needs to learn that it’s what’s on the inside that matters.
Right.
So why is Belle the one that learns this lesson?
Adam falls in love with a gorgeous girl, meanwhile Belle falls in love with a hideous monster who turns into a nice dude on the inside.
Belle is the character who learned to not judge a book by its cover [cover being a monsterous beast but inside he is a gorgeous prince].
As soon as Belle walked into the castle, all the furniture was like “yooooo she could be the one, master hit her up” and instantly Adam’s like “well I need a girl to fall in love with to break my curse and she cute yeah let’s do it”. Like of course there’s more to our then this, but what I’m trying to say is Adam had already planned to try to charm Belle before he knew what kind of person he was because he was desperate to break the curse.
So he and everyone in the castle just saw her and was like “she was a girl, he was a boy, can I make it anymore obvious?”
So anyway anyway anyway, Gaston was only interested in Belle because she was beautiful and he wanted a wife, but Beast was only interested in Belle because she was beautiful and could break the spell. See the parallels again? Like, Beast later fell in love with Belle for who she was and she made him a better person, Gaston could have totally done the same thing.
And okay, there’s no proof Beast cared that Belle was beautiful or not, but yo, Disney definitely should have made Belle ugly af so when Adam met her the snob in him would have been “ew she’s ugly, next” and then Lumiere and Mrs. Potts woulda been like “boi Imma whoop yo ass if you don’t give that girl a try, I don’t care how fucked up her teeth are smfh” and then Adam would have learned the lesson that the enchantress was trying to school him about in the first place [this applies to the 1991 animated film, not directly at the 2017 btw]

Well I was trying to keep this professional and moreso eloquently written but you can tell I’m coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine gotta gotta be down because I want it all

Okay okay okay
Okay okay
Okay

I believe we’re nearing the end. I believe I’ve said all I needed to say made all the points I could [honestly definitely not because I’m constantly thinking about this and arguing with no one in my head, I have a lot to say and later I’ll be making toast and be like “anD ONE MORE THING”]

I’m very upset Gaston died because he wasn’t a terrible enough character to deserve death.

So Dear Disney, either make Gaston more of a shitty person, or bring him back to life. I’ll be waiting for an apology letter until this is done.

Of course I’m kidding.

I just have such a love and passion for Gaston and I’m truly sick of hearing people tell me that Gafou is an abusive ship and Gaston is a villian.

And if you refuse to see that Gaston wasn’t a bad guy but still believe that Adam is such a prince than you’re insanely hypocritical.

People just see what they want to see.

Also I’m terribly sorry for making this so diddly damn long, I honestly have no idea how to do the cutoff “Show more” thing, I’m on mobile. So sorry if you’re trying to rapidly scroll past all of this and it’s taking forever.

But honestly fuck you don’t scroll past my argument.

And also if you legit read all this then motherfucking congratulations to you. Like I don’t even want to read all of this shit to edit it.

Thanks for the attention. Marley OUTT
SKAM S04E05 Clip 5 - Imagine all the people living life in peace

ESKILD: “You’re the one called Elias, right?”
EVA: Elias is your brother?
ESKILD: Then I go up to him and then I stroke him, just a little bit on his side at first, then I feel like a shiver going up his spine. *Gag noises* Then he left pretty quickly, but he seemed open for more fun.
CHRIS: Are you crazy?
EVA: Stop! I can send you the money.
CHRIS: Send me the money? What?
EVA: I can send it! How much is it? Hello!
CHRIS: 112.
EVA: It doesn’t!
CHRIS: 112 for a beer.
EVA: I can give you..
CHRIS: 112,50. 112,40..
[Are you coming?]
EVA: 112,40?
CHRIS: Point 40.
[John Lennon - Imagine]
EVEN: Thank you!
CHRIS: Oh my God
SANA: Yeah..
CHRIS: Yeah..
SANA: Oh, I love you so much.

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Praise Kink

In which Harry is incredibly nervous and y/n knows just how to calm him down.

A/N: WELL I did it. Barely.  I managed to get this finished before Harry’s single dropped so that I’ll be able to freak out in peace tonight.  I hope you enjoy because this is… kinda filthy.  LOVE YA BUY SIGN OF THE TIMES ON ITUNES!

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Dating Draco Malfoy would include

Originally posted by crystelgreene

  • Him feeling like you deserve better
  • Summers at his house he feels a little less lonely
  • Making sure he knows that you love him
  • Encouraging him to follow his dreams and not to do what  other people want him to do
  • Him glaring all the time
  • Being each other’s first time
  • Cute sex
  • Like slow and really sweet sex
  • Kinky sex
  • Seriously hand-holding, you leaning into him, your head on his shoulder
  • Quick kisses before class
  • him doing any and everything to make you laugh
  • Draco being jealous a lot
  • Like when Harry talks to you
  • Or anyone, for that matter
  • “Draco I don’t know why you’re so jealous, i only have eyes for you”
  • “Because darling, you’re mine and only mine, why can’t people understand that”
  • “you’re so cute when you’re jealous”
  • Draco being really shy at the beginning of your relationship
  • And you being a little skeptical that he was just a cocky guy at first
  • You realizing you were wrong halfway through the first date
  • Draco being really awkward with you at first
  • Draco having a crush on you for a really long time before you start dating
  • Draco being protective AF
  • Him constantly talking to about you to crabbe and goyle
  • Them lokey shipping you two so hard
  • sO MANY HUGS
  • Draco always defending you if someone is mean towards you
  • “Draco did you seriously say that to them?’
  • “They deserved it because of what they did to you.”
  • “… Thanks.”
  • “Anytime.”
  • You would end up with a very high tolerance for sarcasm, and you would slowly be able to reply with sarcasm
  • him always taking pictures of you because he thinks you’re the most gorgeous person in the world
  • and he’d keep a photo album full of pictures of the two of you
  • You thinking he was a player before dating
  • Him actually being a sweetheart
  • You always being there for him when he’s sad and vise versa
  • Draco spending a lot of his time trying to make you feel like the queen you are

anonymous asked:

andreil pda around the foxes pleaseee my soul needs it

my marvelous anon, i am here to grant thine request, with a small side of accidental lowkey renison. enjoy <3. also on AO3.


He did it. He actually did it. After months of constant warnings and threats, Wymack finally followed through.

Neil can do nothing but stare at the flyer in his hand, mildly in fear and majorly in shock. A mere thirty seconds prior, Wymack had stormed out of his office brandishing this piece of paper like both a white flag and a declaration of war. He had paused just inside the lounge, making sure to gather everyone’s attention, before striding over to Neil and shoving the flyer in his face.

“This is for last weekend,” Wymack had said. “I already—don’t give me that look, you know exactly what the fuck I’m talking about. I already signed you up. It starts at 8:00 AM on Saturday, and unless you want your ass glued to the bench for the rest of the season, I suggest you be there.” He had then turned back around and disappeared into the hallway, leaving a room full of confused and curious Foxes in his wake.

A full minute passes before chaos breaks out and everyone starts moving at once. Various forms of “What the hell?” can be heard from all corners of the room. Neil blinks as the flyer is yanked out of his hand. He looks up to see Andrew, his eyes scanning the paper. Andrew looks up at him, and Neil’s heart nearly explodes because this look on his face, it looks like the honest-to-god beginnings of a smile. And sure, it’s at Neil’s expense, but he would embarrass the fuck out of himself at every turn if this was his reward. Andrew moves to hand the paper back to Neil.

“Okay, seriously,” Kevin huffs out with impatience as he pushes through his teammates. He snags the flyer away from Andrew who couldn’t be bothered to stop him. Kevin reads aloud, “The Annual Hilton Head Island Marathon…a MARATHON? Really, Neil?! Is this a joke?”

“I don’t know, Kevin,” says Andrew, his voice taking on the persona of a kindergarten teacher. “Did it look like a joke to you?”

Kevin’s only response is to scowl and shove the flyer into Neil’s chest. “This better not affect your performance at our game on Friday. You don’t get to take it easy just because you have to run 26.2 miles the next day.”

By the time Kevin has stormed out of the building, the rest of the Foxes have commenced their team wide freak out.

“Seriously?! He actually came through on that threat?” Dan is caught halfway between being genuinely worried and dying of laughter.

“Neil…bro…what the fuck…” Matt says from somewhere on his left, placing a consoling hand lightly on his shoulder.

“Oh my god, Neil. We have to be there. I have to witness this historic moment. You finally get to put your insane running habits into practice,” Allison is rambling from across the room.

“Wait, what was Wymack talking about ‘last weekend’? What did you do?” Asks Nicky, unaccustomed to being out of the loop.

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Demons Vs Trees

Our party was making our way through a desert, only to find a forest of cedar, growing in straight lines. Finding a obviously man-created forest in the middle of a desert was a little odd, so our druid (who speaks plant languages) decided to introduce himself. 

Druid: Hello, I’m-
Tree: Do you have the stuff? Am I growing straight enough? I can grow straighter if you give me the stuff!
Druid: The…. Stuff?
Tree: Yeah. You know. The stuff.
Druid: I have no clue what the stuff is.
Tree: Guys, he doesn’t have the stuff. (The other trees groan.) Why would you even come if you don’t have the stuff? 

Meanwhile, the fighter and enchanter find some rocks scattered all over the place that could be used in very strong plant growth potions. They relay this information to the druid.

Druid: I don’t have the stuff, but I can try something. (He casts a spell for speeding plant growth)
Tree: Yes! Yes! Again! More! Do it again!
GM: The trees outside the spell radius are getting agitated and are shaking. They are yelling at you for not casting it on them.
Druid: Holy shit guys, these are addict trees.

Later, in the same forest, we get into an encounter involving a bunch of low level demons.  

Fighter: There’s a lot of them, so no stealing my kills! (Starts off towards the nearest target)
Enchanter: (Uses a spell that vaporizes all of the demons in a 30ft radius)
Fighter: Seriously? What did I just say? (Heads after another)
Druid: (Quietly hands a note to the GM)
GM: Suddenly, the trees begin to shake and branches start falling off left and right. You head thuds through out all of the forest. Luckily, none of you seem to even get a scratch- but all of the demons are dead. After investigating, you find there were more than you thought there were. Maybe about 300 total.
Fighter: Are you kidding me with all this? I wanted to smash something.
Druid: So umm. I might have promised that any trees who helped us in the fight would get a growth spell. We might be in the forest for a while.
Enchanter: I’m still getting over that the battle was won by addict trees.

2

(19:42) Yeah he just screamed and chucked his phone across the room. He definitely sent it.

(19:45) What did it say?

(19:50) No idea, he wouldn’t let me read it???

(19:50) Fingers crossed it’ll work?

(19:51) Yeah, yeah.

(19:55) kEITH IS AT MY DOOR???

(19:55) HIS FACE IS REALLY RED AND HE’S JUST WAVING HIS PHONE AROUND.

(19:55) I can’t believe this.

Some art for Call Me Beep Me! Go read it!! It is amazing!!!!

Angel in the Darkness pt.5

Originally posted by aestheticvbts

Summary: After a patient urgently pleads you to go and help a friend of his, you naively agree to it. Little did you know, that you would get more than what you agreed to, when he leads you to a brothel, to help a dangerous prostitute named Jeon Jungkook.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (ft. Jin, but not romantically)

Genre: Smut (M), angst, mafia!au, prostitution!au

A/N:This is a dark and filthy story! Graphic descriptions of sex (masturbating, etc), heavy dom/sub undertones, drug use, vulgar language use……(alot of smut comes in later) This is a mature read! You have been warned!

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 



The bright sunlight behind the curtains, stirs you awake from your deep sleep. There’s a faint smile stretched upon your lips, as you feel as if you’ve had one of the best naps in the longest of times. Your eyes are still closed shut as you try to flex your stiff muscles; only you can’t.

As soon as you tried to lift your arms, you hit something very hard and muscular. Huh? That’s weird. You can also feel that your legs are entangled, and something wrapped around your waist.

You didn’t mind the feeling, as you were still too tired to process things, and because it brought great warmth, but then you heard it; a faint grunt. Your eyes instantly shoot open, and you blush hard when you realize you’re wrapped up into Jungkook.

His face is mere centimeters away from yours, and his eyes are still closed shut, indicating he’s still asleep. You can feel his hot breath, gently tickling your red face, as his hair is all over. You peer downwards and see that his left arm is securely wrapped around your waist, as both of you were laying down on your sides. His long, thick legs were clumsily tangled with yours, and you were finding it hard to breathe since you were so close to him.

OH MY GOD! WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?!?!

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anonymous asked:

53 andreil for the prompt thingy???

53: “Darling, stop.” 

They’re in the chilly fluorescent produce section, Neil steering the cart and Andrew catching it whenever he finds chocolate-covered berries or cartons of blended sugary juice to add to the pile. Neil’s got his old jersey conspicuously clashing with their new team’s red sweats, a dark bandana twisted up in his hair. It’s almost closing, and everything feels a bit cool and loose like no one’s really supposed to be awake.

When Neil’s busy bagging carrots Andrew gets his arms folded over the handle of the shopping cart, this stupid black t-shirt all stretched out at the neck, wire-framed glasses perched on his nose, mouth flat. Neil’s sort of fond of Andrew wearing his glasses in public, and he finds himself walking backwards in front of the cart as it’s pushed, openly watching him. Andrew picks the pace up just enough to bump heavily into his shins.

Neil smiles, looping his fingers through his end of the cart so they each have a side, rolling lopsidedly towards the opening of an aisle.

“Stop making things difficult.”

“Let me drive the cart.”

Andrew regards him, fair eyebrows raised. “You’re a control freak.”

Neil laughs, startled. “You let three people total drive your car. You wouldn’t even let Sir or King in our bed for the first three months we had them. You bartered for my secrets when we met, Andrew. ”

“And?” Andrew asks, examining a box of cake mix.

“I don’t think you should be talking about controlling personalities.”

Andrew ignores him, tossing the box in the cart and pushing it back towards Neil. “Go get your diet plan shit.”

Neil makes a face. “It’s our diet plan.”

“I am not willfully drinking skimmed milk.” Andrew crosses to the bags of jumbo marshmallows and Neil pinches the bridge of his nose.

“I’ll put it in your hot chocolate.”

“You’ll die,” Andrew says simply.

Neil jostles the cart into Andrew’s side, and he drops the marshmallows back on the shelf, unimpressed. “Meet me at the front in five. I’m getting actual food to sustain actual people.”

Andrew shrugs and turns to wander out of the aisle, dragging the cart the wrong way behind him.

Neil coughs so he doesn’t laugh, senselessly thrilled. He jogs back towards the meat section, threading through coolers and displays until he finds the turkey bacon and lean chicken breasts that they live on. He’s frowning at an especially lifeless beige cut of fish when he’s wrenched around by the arm.

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OMG I just called Netflix and they said that SO many people all the around the world have already called for Sense8 and wow I’m feeling so emotional again. I initially wasn’t going to call because like I mentioned the other day on this blog I get really anxious when I make a phone call but I’m so glad I did!

If you can please please please call in, the person was really nice and took what I had to say seriously. He asked for a statement and I basically said some probably incoherent babbles but they got the gist!

Also: if you have a Netflix account make sure to sign in and at the bottom of the customer help page there should be a 6 digit number that you can enter when prompted and that will get your call transferred faster.

AGAIN PLEASE CALL NETFLIX IF YOU WANT SENSE8 SEASON 3 PLEASE DON’T GIVE UP HOPE
Identity Theft

Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Request: “63 and 67 separately jughead x reader please if its too much then could you just do 67 thank you”

Prompt:
#67 “Are you getting jealous?” - “You’re changing your outfit, now!”

Warnings: I think there’s more than one curse in this one? Also allusions to sex but no actual sex because I’m innocent

A/N: I didn’t want this to get sexual like it did but OOPS I guess I’m just really thirsty lately

Tag list: @1amluke, @betty-coopers-number-one-stan, @keepcalmandflywithtoothless, @lostinpercyseyes, @captainsuperfangirl

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anonymous asked:

Can you write about lance (from voltron) getting angry? like snaping, because I feel like we haven't seen lance truly angry yet, all the times we have seen him mad, but it seemed more agitated to me, and so I would love it if you wrote about lance snapping, just him being so sick of everything and someone makes a bad comment at the wrong time and he just snaps and he is terrifying, please? (p.s can it be super angst?)

Sorry if this is quite what you wanted, but here you go anon!

I image Lance as someone who would let himself get beat up but would kick someone’s ass if they dared to touch his friend, as well as being quietly intimidating since he often is loud and the contrast shows how serious he’s being.

Warning for some light swearing!

Lance made his way towards the kitchen, he was up a bit earlier than usual, though not overly so. He had gotten enough scoldings from Allura to know he needed to get his shit together. He often feels like he’s holding back the team and he is willing to make double the effort to become useful.

As he approached the entrance to the kitchen, he heard the muffled sounds of his teammates talking. Hoping Hunk was working his magic and preparing something other than the bland food goo, he sped up a tad. His fantasies of Hunk’s cooking ended abruptly when he got close enough to clearly make out what one of the voices was saying

“-know he’s trying, but he has to step it up! He’s lagging behind all of us.” He heard Shiro say

Lance stopped in his tracks. Shiro, Lance’s hero, just openly spoke about some of Lance’s biggest insecurities.

He spun around to go back to his room, however, dozens of cheesy soap operas and cliché scenes of drama being started from someone misinterpreting, mishearing, or misunderstanding made him stay.

He pressed his back against the wall, and he slid down it until he was sitting. He was a couple feet away from the doorway so while he could make out what his team was saying, he still had time to react and get up if he heard footsteps.

“I say we make him train more,” was Keith’s less than helpful input in lance’s opinion. He has trained a lot on his own, but he just wasn’t improving fast enough.

“Guys, Lance tries really hard, lay off a little,” Lance appreciated Hunk’s support and confidence in him, though it didn’t make Shiro and Keith’s comments sting any less

“Hunk, we know you’re the closest to Lance, but doesn’t that make your opinion a little more biased?”

“Lance isn’t at the same level as us, and he needs to get there.”

Hunk desperately tried to defend him but Lance knew it was a lost cause at this point, the more he listened to, the more he got frustrated. He contemplated getting up and leaving to calm himself down in his room now that he knew this wasn’t a misinterpretation; he was the subject of the conversation, more specifically, his inadequacy.

“Shouldn’t you get back to cooking or something? Shiro and I were discussing this and you kind of butted in,” Lance snapped to attention at that comment, did Keith seriously just say that?

Before Lance even processed what he was doing, he stormed into the kitchen, walked up into Keith’s startled face, his own looking furious, “What the hell did you just say?” his tone was even in a terrifying way

Keith seemed to understand it was a rhetorical question, Shiro seemed unnerved by Lance’s uncharacteristically serious tone.

“Lance, it was nothing-”

“That’s bull, Hunk, and you know it. That was entirely uncalled for.” Lance turned back towards the other two presences in the room, “Listen and listen well. If you even breathe another word that belittles, demeans, puts down, or even suggests Hunk did anything wrong when he hasn’t done a damn thing, then you’d better hope and pray I am as far behind in training as you suggest I am.” His tone was chilling, his eyes locked onto Keith’s, his icy glare effectively putting out the fire in Keith’s.

Keith soon snapped out of it and seemed to contemplate something before speaking, “So are you saying that if we insult Hunk you’ll be more motivated to train harder?” that was the wrong thing to say.

The ice in Lance’s gaze melted, being replaced with a fire that could burn anyone it was directed at, “If you dare to suggest what I think you are, my position on the team will not be your main concern.” his voice had started low, rising with every word, “Are we clear?” his words were short and tight, intimidating everyone in the room.

Nods from both Shiro and Keith were enough for Lance, he wasn’t going to let it go right away but he knew they understood.

“Alright, good,” Lance questioned if he should address what had spurred Hunk being dismissed and decided he would if only a little.

Lance locked eyes with Keith “What you say cuts deep,” he glanced at Shiro “Both of you. I looked up to you both, but I can take it. I know my faults, I know where I need improvement, and Hunk’s right, I do try…”

Lance’s voice had gotten soft as it trailed off, his eye’s having found themselves trained on the floor directly in front of his feet, he could feel the pitying gaze of the other three “All you are doing is vocalizing thoughts I’ve had a thousand times over,” Lance shook himself out of it and looked up again, Shiro and Keith stood in front of him ”but what I can’t take is you putting down my best friend when he has done nothing wrong.”

Lance had just about burned out, getting angry was exhausting. He was done with being frustrated for today, he turned on his heel and stalked out of the room, initially heading back to his room before opting to go to the only place he knew he couldn’t be disturbed. Blue.