dibble dabbles

The Weeknd still uses drugs for inspiration

Los Angeles, Dec 5 (IANS) Singer The Weeknd still turns to drugs when he needs help with his music.

“I dibble and dabble and what not. Everything in moderation. When I had nothing to do but make music, it was very heavy. Drugs were a crutch for me. There were songs on my first record that were seven minutes long, rambling – whatever thoughts I was having when I was under the influence at the time,” The Weeknd told The Guardian’s Weekend Magazine.

“I can’t see myself doing that now. I’ll be completely honest with you. The past couple of albums, I do get back to that. Even on this new album. You have writer’s block. And sometimes you’re like, I can’t do this sober,” he added.

He cancelled his tour and something happened to his inspiration.

“I guess it was the weight on my shoulders. I’d cancelled a tour – a lot of money. I had these ideas, but I couldn’t put them on wax. If you were a psychologist, you’d probably tell me there was stress in my life, taking away from my work. I had to get that little jump. And the ball started rolling. And then I didn’t need it anymore,” he said.

The “Can’t feel my face” hitmaker also shared that he doesn’t necessarily agree with some of the lyrics he wrote about women when he was younger.

“I don’t think I’d ever apologise for music I make, no. But there are regrets in my life, of course. And you write about it. The mind of a 19-year-old is very different from the mind of a 26-year-old. You grow.”

“You get into better relationships. You experience more, meet more people, better people. But when you’re in a dark hole, at an earlier point in your life – you write about the mindset you’re in at that moment,” he said.



i think that when people are shocked about a beautiful person getting cheated on, it reminds me that we don’t ever really go into detail about unpacking what cheating is about.

in my opinion

you don’t cheat on someone because you found someone better or more attractive, because those are reasons to break up with someone and move on.

people cheat because they are cowards, and save from situations of abuse/circumstance where you cannot leave a person, people who cheat make a conscious decision to do so, and cheat out of a lack of respect for their partner and an insecurity of self.

when you know who you are and what you want, you pick your partner and you stick with them, to dibble dabble, to go both ways, to be wishy washy in who you deal with is a demonstration that indecision is a decision. you couldn’t pick what’s more important, the one you’re with or the one you want, and so you decided to cheat.

a person can be gorgeous and smart and funny and “perfect, " but that doesn’t make them immune from being cheated on. because cheating is about the cheater, not the person getting cheated on. it is not about the inadequacies of the person cheated on, but the inadequacies of the cheater

I’m sorry I’m not signing off on that “brown folk grew up around black people so appropriation is not really a thing in this case”…. BULL-FUCKIN-SHIT… Cause let a nigga even attempt to entertain thinking about appropriating y'all shit.. Wouldn’t hear the end of you mofos… See this is what I’m trying to understand… Why is black culture the default culture.. ? Like why is it alright for folks to dibble and dabble in black culture.. playing around and shit.. talking like us.. walking like us.. dancing like us.. dressing like us.. basically mimicking us… but you still anti-black as fuck doe…? Sorry I don’t give a fuck if you was the only non-black person in the hood.. Watch your fuckin self.. Cause you ain’t one of us.. sorry not sorry.. And why are people trying to say that black people should be alright with folks who don’t like us trying to mimic us..? shit feels real minstrel-ly to me… so noap..

Mark - Atlanta, GA

BW: What was it like growing up in Ohio?

Mark: Poor… The economy there was really poor. My dad was in the military. My grandma raised me. My mom passed away in my arms at fourteen. She had this medication that would almost immediately stop seizures. She locked her jaw and she wouldn’t let me put it in her mouth and that was it. She didn’t want it. She wanted to go. 

She had renal cell cancer but it was the seizure that killed her. She went through almost two years of chemo. That’s when I started dibble dabbling with pain pills. That’s how I started on heroin. 

Then my brother committed suicide two years later. He was only twenty-one. Then my grandpa passed away two years after that and he was like my best friend. All my grandma’s got left is me and my sister. 

BW: Do you ever talk to her?

Mark: I talk to her almost every day. I’m the only person who talks to her. 

BW: You ever think about getting back to Ohio?

Mark: Ah yeah. I’d love to get back to Ohio. I’m not going now because it’s getting cold. It’s freezing up there. I’m fighting with the VA right now for my benefits. Once I start getting my benefits, then yeah I’ll shoot back up to Ohio. 

BW: Do you have any regrets?

Mark: Using drugs for starters. I wish I’d never touched a needle in my life. 

My dad just passed away this year and I was in jail when he passed away. That’s a big regret.

BW: I’m sorry, man.