dex star

dinosaurswearingdior  asked:

can we hear more in the sugar daddy nursey universe? or nursey and dex bonding over space stuff because nursey loves the beauty of the universe and dex loves the beauty of the math of it so they watch nerdy space programs together at 3 AM

OH MAN SPACE NERDS

  • one day nursey walks into dex’s room and dex is laying on his bed reading “death by black hole” by neil degrasse tyson and nursey’s just like “BROOOOOOOOO”
    • dex is like omg do NOT chirp me for this
    • nursey’s like DUDE I’VE READ IT TWICE
  • after that there’s no going back
  • like ½ of their texts are “cosmos is on rn come watch with me” or “DID U SEE THAT ARTICLE I POSTED ON FB?? SIIIIIIICK, RIGHT?”
  • dex doodles planets and stars and spaceships in the margins of his notebooks
  • nursey sticks little stars up on the ceiling of his room
  • they’re both sluts for eclipses and super moons and blood moons and everything like that
  • when nursey first visits dex in maine dex takes him way out to where there’s no light pollution and it’s the first time nursey really sees the stars and he doesn’t cry but it’s a close call
  • nursey gets dex a “nasa” hat for his birthday
  • dex gets nursey a “i need my space” tshirt for christmas
  • they’re both fascinated by the concept of entropy, but for different reasons
    • dex: “it’s the one thing that, no matter what, always increases. it’s so crazy, like, entropy of the universe is just ever-increasing”
    • nursey: “the tendency of the world towards disorder, man. like, we are always slowly moving towards chaos. murphy’s law, man. murphy’s law.”
  • when they get married they get space tattoos bc they are NERDS IN LOVE

high school frogs!!!!!!

starring dex as the hot mess pizza face, chowder as the awkward chunky boy too nice and too into teal, and nursey as the one sighing his way through a lily-white prep school

In honor of Chowder’s Birthday, here’s a Cryptid Dex ficlet starring Chowder.

Because I apparently can’t help myself. Read the bulletpoint fic about Dex the Cryptid here! Also for the record I know nothing about sharks so I’m POSITIVE this is all completely incorrect but you know what? I’m writing about cryptids so are we really here for scientifically accurate text? No We Are Not

Edit: actually i lied and now know a decent amount about porbeagle sharks


Chowder’s most frequent questions to Dex after he revealed himself have been about sharks. Almost constantly.

“Have you ever met a shark?”

“Where do you usually see sharks?”

“How often do you see sharks?”

“What kind of sharks do you see?”

“Do they like you?”

“… Have you ever had a conversation with one?”

Dex did have to clear up that he can’t communicate with animals. But he really doesn’t mind, their name partially comes from being mistaken as sharks anyway. Well, maybe not NEBBs like Dex in particular, but the bigger ones that live in the ocean. Technically he could be mistaken as a shark? Whatever, logistics.

Nursey made an executive decision after Chowder learned about Dex that Chowder would get a scuba license. His reasoning was that if Dex ever was forced to go into hiding, they could still act as his keepers and check up on him. A good way to do that would be to meet in the water. Plus Nursey wanted Chowder to see Dex in the water.

Nursey pays for the lessons and the license and the equipment. They store it at Dex’s parents house, Chowder meeting them for the first time when they bring it up. His parents take to Chowder a little faster than they did to Nursey, probably because they had two people they trusted telling them he’s trustworthy. That, and Chowders unadulterated enthusiasm about the entire thing ultimately put them at ease. They happily let in the ray of sunshine goalie. They were able to bring it up at the end of September, but it wasn’t until the second weekend of October that they had the chance to actually go use it. It was chilly, and the water would be cold, but they had gotten the heavy duty cold water gear for a reason. Maine water is frigid no matter what time of year you go. 

Dex and Nursey knew it was Chowder’s 20th birthday. Of course they knew. They had a few hushed conversations in the week leading up, and Dex made a few phone calls home. When it came to the weekend, Chowder’s birthday resting on a holiday, and confirmation from Dex’s brother, everything was set.

They met Dex’s brother at the dock. It was a monday holiday and they met early enough where even the most  dedicated fishermen would still be in bed or getting ready to head out. It’s the first time both Nursey and Chowder met Dex’s brother, and if they thought his parents (both at 6′5″) were intimidating, they had nothing on his brother.

Standing at 7′4″ he towered over all of them, toned muscles on display as he was only wearing spandex shorts. Nursey had a new slew of questions, as did Chowder, but they decided quickly it can wait. Dex had mentioned he hadn’t seen his brother since the beginning of summer. They were very, very happy to see each other, his brother manhandling Dex easily as Dex protested, but both doing so with a wide, toothy smile. Ultimately they hugged and talked in low voices as Nursey and Chowder loaded up the motorboat. His brother quickly slipped into the water and told Dex where to meet him before shooting off.

They got there in roughly fifteen minutes, stopping the boat and dropping the small anchor. Dex’s brother found them after another few, Nursey and Chowder getting their gear fully on. Dex quickly stripped down to his spandex as well, slipping into the water and only emerging ten minutes later when Nursey began slapping the water to get his attention. Nursey and Chowder submerged themselves, but not before Dex’s brother gave them some advice.

“She’s fine, actually really friendly. Just don’t startle her, don’t flip her over, and let her go when and where she wants to go.”

Chowder looked to Nursey for clarification, who only smiles before popping in his regulator and falling backwards into the ocean. Chowder follows.

At first he’s captured by the way Dex’s brother moves in the ocean. Fluid, like he blongs there. Like the ocean moves with him, for him, around him, instead of him moving in it. It’s breathtaking.

Then he almost screams, almost starts to cry, because under him is Dex scratching the side of a Porbeagle shark. He has a lot of emotions running through him very quickly. 

She’s larger than any of them at almost eight feet. She seems relatively disinterested in them, but does keep coming back to swim by Dex and his brother, leaning into their hands as they run them over her skin. They’re both smiling, making clicking noises Chowder is sure they can hear better than Nursey and Chowder can.

Dex ultimately brings Chowder closer to him, having him stay still by his side as they wait for the shark to pass by again. When she does, Dex takes Chowder’s hand and holds it out, holds it against her skin as she passes by. Nursey stays closer to the boat, decidedly not getting close to the shark.

They emerge once the shark has decided it’s had enough and swam off, leaving Chowder emotional and Dex and his brother smiling. They clamber back into the boat, Dex’s brother helping them by boosting them out of the water. Once Chowder is safely in the boat he rips out his regulator and starts talking.

“Oh my gosh. Oh my god! You guys! That was a porbeagle! They usually come down into the gulf of maine during this time to mate! Oh my gosh she was so gorgeous, I thought she was a great white at first!”

Dex’s brother laughs, hanging off the edge of the boat. “Yeah, that’s fako.”

Chowder whips around with a huge smile. “Yeah!!! They’re called that up here because they’re mistaken as shortfin mako’s all the time up here!”

Dex’s brother nods. “Yup, that’s her. I’ve actually gone hunting with her a few times. I wouldn’t say we’re friends, but she seems to tolerate me. I like her a lot.”

Chowder doesn’t stop talking the entire way back, only pausing once they’re back on the dock to turn to Dex and Nursey. “Thank you, you guys. This was so, so cool. I couldn’t ask for a better trip.”

Nursey and Dex take once glance at each other before turning back to their friend with a smile. “Happy Birthday, Chowder.”

“OH MY GOD! I FORGOT IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY! THIS WAS THE BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!”

can we just like….talk about dexter jettster? how qui gon passed this amazing  giant four-armed lizard man’s friendship to obi wan and they just talk about everything together and how they probably have this secret code language or something for all the shady things going down in the republic? how they have casual lunches in this greasy diner with cups of steaming caff? how they sit and chat on rooftops through clouds of smoke from dex’s cheroots? and how dex’s seen it all- he knows obi wan, probably as well as some of the masters in the temple do- and how he knows anakin too and even ahsoka and how he probably saw the first billows of smoke roll up from the jedi temple that night? 

Imagine Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka sitting at Dex’s

And Ahsoka wants to have a drink too, but Obi-Wan forbids. “You are underaged“. And Anakin permits: “I’am you Master, and I give you permission“.

And then Anakin and Obi-Wan start to argue about something. Anakin eventually looses his temper and jumps on Obi-Wan, and they start rolling across the floor kicking each other.

And Ahsoka just sits calmly, because she knows that Kenobi and Skywalker will never hurt each other. And she exchanges a look with Dex which says: “Boys will be boys.“

nimblermortal replied to this post: By ‘handmaidens start to have fun with it’ you mean ‘handmaidens start taking Obi-Wan on increasingly obvious dates’, right?

Er, well, no, not really.

(Sorry, friend, you have stumbled on my irrational and no longer secret pet peeve for the common fandom trope that all handmaidens flirt with Obi-Wan.)

It’s more like…well, the distractions are usually of the kind that are harmless, but will definitely attract a Jedi’s attention. So some disturbance in a public place, and of course it’s Obi-Wan’s duty as a Jedi to try to sort it out. Or a Concerned Citizen approaches who has an issue they absolutely must raise with the Jedi. Or, worst of all in Obi-Wan’s book, reporters.

One time, Obi-Wan is stuck talking to Holonet News Channel 1138 for nearly a full hour about Jedi policy with regards to violent holo games, of all things, while his blasted padawan is off doing….something with Sabe and Yane in the market district of Corellia. Something probably a lot more exciting. Obi-Wan just grits his teeth and reminds himself that adventure and excitement are not things a Jedi craves.

Then there’s the time, just after Anakin’s eighteenth birthday, when Rabe and Eirtae show up in Dex’s Diner. (In Dex’s Diner! Is nothing sacred anymore?!) Obi-Wan, of course, doesn’t notice them, since he’s too distracted by the increasingly loud and disruptive complaints of a Dug couple sitting two booths down. When food starts flying, he figures he’ll have to go help smooth things over.

When he gets back to his table, Anakin is gone, but Dex has taken his place. “Dare I ask,” says the Besalisk with a grin, “why two attractive young ladies have just made off with your teenage apprentice?”

Obi-Wan just lets out a long and despondent sigh. “They’re plotting a revolution, I’m afraid.”

“Huh,” says Dex. “Well. Isn’t that something.”

Obi-Wan looks at him sharply, but Dex has always had a damn good poker face. And at that moment Anakin comes back, and actually has the nerve to claim that he was using the facilities, of all things. The facilities! It’s like the boy isn’t even trying anymore!

“That’s too bad,” says Dex with a shrug, licking sauce off the corner of his mouth. “While you were gone I got hungry.”

Anakin stares at him, looking utterly stricken, until Dex laughs and says, “Come with me to the kitchen and I’ll get you something to go.”

Anakin follows Dex into the kitchen, and Obi-Wan stays in the restaurant because how long can it actually take, right?

Only apparently the answer to that question is “nearly half an hour,” because that’s how long it takes Anakin to reappear with a takeout box.

“Sorry, Master,” he says cheerfully. “Dex was out of his special sauce and had to whip up some more.”

“And you decided to have a couple of sliders while you waited?” Obi-Wan asks dryly.

“What?”

“There are crumbs on your tabard, padawan.”

He expected Anakin to panic, at least a little, but the boy just grins. “Well, Master, you know I’m a growing boy…”

And that’s that. Obi-Wan doesn’t say anything else. He tries not to think about how much more difficult it’s going to be to eat at his favorite restaurant, now that Anakin has apparently recruited Dex into his damn fool crusade, too.

Text : Infomercial Star❤️️
  • Dex: cake me the FUCK up 🎂🎈🎂🎈🎂🎈🎂🎈🎂🎈 happy birthday hAppy birtHday 🎂 thats 🍰 some happy🎂🎂 birthday right🎂🎂 there🎂🎂🎂 right🍰 there 🍰🍰 if i do ƽaү so my self 🎁 i say so 🎁 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ🎁🎂🎂🎂 НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ🎂🎂🎂🎂🎁🎂🎈🎈🎈🎂🎂 Happy birthday
  • Dex: Happy birthday, dweeb. ❤️️
  • Dex: How's your day so far?