dew cup

some gems from the liberal redneck’s videos:

  • shieet.
  • these are the same mothafuckers who put mountain dew in sippy cups and beat a 6 year old with a wire hanger for standin’ in front of the tv during dr. oz
  • y’ALL are so full of S H I T
  • HARDLY
  • NOT
  • NEVER
  • mouth-breathin’ troglodyte daddy
  • unless you’re also suggestin’ that we have separate bathrooms for catholic priests i think you need ta’ cut the shit
  • you’re freaked out. the thought of a man wantin’ to be a woman DEESGUSTS y o u. 
  • because like most things that disgust you, you lack the capacity to understand it.
  • you know, homos, algebra, shit like that
  • his conservative, transphobic, homophobic facebook redneck friends
  • his thick Tennessean accent
  • are y OU SHITTIN’ ME?? 
  • i got one question: since when do rednecks give a shit about books?
  • y’uns
  • what ever happened to free speech? 
the stoner squad au
  • okay so it’s zoe, carter, root, and shaw
  • zoe and root share one dorm room
  • carter and shaw share the other
  • technically it’s a suite so they all share a bathroom
  • like just the four of them
  • shaw’s pre med, carter is criminal justice, zoe is maybe international studies, and root…..well, no one really knows what root’s major is
  • or why she’s even there
  • she takes the weirdest classes. no one can tell what the hell she’s trying to do
  • relatable
  • she spends most of her time scrunched up with her laptop in her room surrounded by a mountain dew/coffee cup/cliff bar graveyard
  • sometimes a few apples cores are thrown into the mix
  • zoe used to try to coax her to go to the cafeteria downstairs
  • root only goes at odd hours. she has social anxiety. people don’t make sense to her.
  • she has to be hella toasted to leave the dorm tbh
  • in the beginning, before her and zoe were friends, root tried to be low key about smoking. opened the window, all that nice shit
  • zoe walks in one day and is like “oh you smoke? thank fuck, my day was terrible” and snatches the joint out of her hands
  • they become great pals after that
  • which brings carter into the mix bc her and zoe are sorta/maybe/kinda dating
  • and carter Does Not Smoke
  • “c’mon, babe”
  • “hell nope”
  • “you’re not a cop yet”
  • zoe sighs but she’s not gonna peer pressure her gf
  • carter supervises and drives them to taco bell at one am
  • bc she doesn’t trust them to drive themselves
  • root’s like “zoe. ZOe. dude get on my bike im fiNE”
  • zoe’s all “cool lets go!!”
  • “both y'all sit your dumbasses down. im getting my keys”
  • elias is a known dealer but root doesnt buy from him
  • only when she’s desperate.
  • she buys from a mysterious woman only known as “the machine”
  •  elias is importing from cali or something. but the machine’s stuff is like super legit top notch stuff
  • it’s rumored to be growing on campus somewhere. hydroponics in a basement or something
  • im not saying harold’s in on it.
  • but he has chronic pain.
  • so.
  • root buys from harper who gets it from tm
  • root gets a steep discount bc she buys so much. she’s a loyal customer
  • so root/zoe/carter have been chilling for awhile
  • its a really bad day for zoe. she failed her french project. she has two tests tomorrow
  • carter’s massaging her shoulders a bit
  • root’s typing away on her laptop, blunt in her mouth
  • the usual
  • “i need a break. root?”
  • joss frowns. she knows what this means. “guys. come on. again?”
  • “zoe hasnt gotten blazed in like. two weeks. she stopped for awhile so she could be ‘responsible’ and study with you. and now she deserves a break!”
  • carter rolls her eyes
  • “yeah, joss! i deserve a reward.”
  • joss raises an eyebrow
  • “not that you’re not enough of a reward, babe”
  • “better”
  • root rummages through the tin she keeps under her bed
  • she shakes her head. “you need something special. i think harper has edibles. you in?”
  • zoe’s grin is all the answer she needs
  • root tosses zoe her lighter and a pipe. “you guys go ahead, i’ll be back in half an hour, tops”
  • carter: “i regret ever talking to either of you”
  • so root meets up with harper, drops some sweet cash on a tray full of brownies. they’re gonna get fucked up
  • harper and her long time gf dani come along too
  • root, harper, and dani come back. zoe offers up the pipe. they smoke a few bowls. it’s all pretty chill
  • dani takes it easy. she’s pretty sensitive to the stuff
  • root and zoe go hard.
  • harper is chilling and smoking and loving life. when dani is stoned she gets super cuddly and touchy. bless her tiny gay gf
  • so they’re about to bust out the brownies when shaw barges in
  • “joss, have you seen my chem notes–what the fuck”
  • everyone freezes
  • no one knows if shaw is cool or not
  • “carter, you smoke?”
  • “of course not. but someone has to look out for these dipshits”
  • shaw looks around the room
  • dani is curled up in harper’s lap and is super fascinated by her hair
  • zoe’s leg is bouncing at a million miles an hour and bobbing out of time to the music
  • harper is staring at dani likes she holds the secrets to the universe
  • root has a pretty decent tolerance, so she’s looking reasonably normal
  • well. as normal as root can look
  • “want a brownie?” root blurts out
  • bless her shes trying her best
  • shaw shrugs. “sure”
  • root makes room for her on the bed. tries to play it cool
  • shaw sits down next to her, oblivious. "so whats your name?“
  • "uh?”
  • “your /name/”
  • “root?”
  • “are you asking me or telling me?”
  • “telling?”
  • “…right.”
  • root stuffs two brownies in her mouth to avoid talking
  • she’s not high enough to talk to pretty girls.
  • through a mouthful of brownie: “you want one?”
  • shaw sighs. she’s not high enough to deal with this. no matter how pretty this girl is
  • she takes three. root’s eyes widen
  • “you sure you wanna…have that many?”
  • “you took two.”
  • “yeah but…”
  •  harper laughs “someone’s gonna have a good night. relax, root, let her learn for herself”

i haven’t bought sock glue since my first feis.

i have never run out. i’ve been dancing for 11 years, and ever since my first competition i’ve had a bottle of sock glue in my dance bag. and i have never had to say “i’m almost out of sock glue i need to buy more.” it’s oddly concerning but also surreal because 1) how and 2) when can i use this power on other things

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Dennis Enarson Run 3 - BMX Dirt Finals

6

I made liquid AesthetiCola, the official drink of the 1990s. Ingredients 1 cup Sprite 1 pouch of Polar Blue Hawaiian Punch ½ cup Mountain Dew ½ cup Club Soda Maybe add in some Crush or Crystal Pepsi if you want Best enjoyed while wearing Ray Bans and listening to Macintosh Plus.

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Scotty Cranmers incredible winning run!

An inmate was nice enough to send me a book of prison recipes that he had because he knows I’m into that kind of thing. He also included some of his stash of kool aid (Hawaiian Punch Berry Blue Typhoon) so I could try one of his favorite drinks.

The recipe is as follows: 1/3 of the little Hawaiian Punch packet

1 can of Mountain Dew

A cup of ice

Basically you’re just adding the powder to Mountain Dew with ice and I actually tried it and I think I’m gonna die from a sugar rush rn. If you’re used to drinking sugary drinks, you’ll probably like this if you aren’t, I don’t recommend 😳.

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Dennis you’ve just won the Cup…. show us some happiness!