The Haunted Forest - A Quick Guide

What you’ll need: gun, funny mask, big ouchy-radius supper, emote that lets your team mates know that they suck (alternatively a dance)

Start the Spooky Forest activity by selecting your Tower Map and clicking the funky blue crown icon at the top center. Select the friends or no friends variant. If you are alone, go with no friends variant! The Forest is harsh and unforgiving and the Knights will not be gentle!

1. Load into the activity and step into the Vex circle until it turns from red to white. Congratulations! The suffering can now begin!

2. Now comes the most important part! Kill every enemy you see! Every. Single. One. To advance in the forest you will have to pass through doors which do not look like doors at all but this forest also has no trees so what do I know! Some doors will be locked by Daemons so make sure to kill those assholes first, always! They have top priority on your “Things That Need To Die” list!

3. Once you get 100% on a branch you will be teleported to the endboss of said branch! Through complex calculation I found out that one enemy gives you 2% whereas a Daemon will give you 8%.

4. When you reach the boss of the branch, it is fun time! Melt that bitch like cheese on your lasagna. Annihilate it. If you win, you will be sent to the next branch. Rinse and repeat from step one!

Some valuable tips:

- Contrary to popular belief, the bridges between the rooms do NOT spawn faster when you are standing close to them! Instead, the Vex will use your atoms to build the bridge! You will literally fucking die!

- Not only does the lightlevel of your enemies scale, but there will also be modifiers added throughout the branches. Glass is especially fun with ten billion enemies shooting at you from all sides at once!

- Sometimes there will be chests! Open them to get extra Fragmented Souls! But the chests are not guaranteed and you do not have time to waste looking for them either. Only open them if you stumble over them!

- Once you run out of time(15 minutes in total) the activity will not end immediately. Instead it will turn into a Darkness zone and you will be able to finish the branch! If you die, you will still get rewards from the branches before!

- Sometimes a Knight with the lovely name of “The Invincible Nightmare” will appear out of fucking nowhere! He is big, angry and literally invincible. You will deal zero damage but he will chase you through an entire room and smack you with his axe until you are nothing but a bloody pile of human remains. He is not cool! Avoid him!

- Once you reach the end, there will be a cool walk towards the chest. Just go over the bridge! There is nothing to fear! There is no need to jump and there is definitely not a monster hidden under the path! :]

Happy Festival of the Lost!

On the subject of the Traveler “bringing war everywhere it goes”….while that’s technically true, it really doesn’t change much when the Darkness is a perpetual menace that seeks to destroy everything, no matter what. 

Basically saying Mara and Osiris are wrong about that sentiment, because the Darkness would’ve come for them with or without the Traveler. 

But it was the Traveler that gave them the fighting chance. 

“You know what I miss?”

“The old Tower lounge? That one frame could mix a killer negroni…”

“Yeah, but also old sparrows. All these new chassis types now just don’t handle the same.”

“Maybe not, but a lot more options for goin’ fast.”

“Eh, sure, but nothing’s beat out what some of the top-notch rigs could do. Saw this old thing off to the side in the hangar the other day, reminded me of my old EV-34…”

“Oh, here we go again…”

“Nah, don’t pretend that wasn’t the sweetest ride you ever rode.”

“It was nice, sure, but it wasn’t the goddamn unicorn you seem to remember it being.”

“I don’t even know how you can pretend that—”

“Maybe because the handling was twitchy—”

“—but there was never a better sparrow—”

“—or maybe just the strip lighting drawing fire from a hundred klicks off…”

“—for racing or in the field. It was just the best.”

“…Look, it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t all that.”

“Bull, my dude. Name a sparrow that even compared.”

“My Shimmering Iris does at least as well on the track, and for a racing sparrow it holds up damn fine out and about.”

“Pfft. Thing’s a damn stock machine with this year’s shader slapped on. Doesn’t even have the on-paper performance of a Velumbra… or a Ravensteel—to hell with the racing chassis!”

“You’re impossible. I’m sorry your favorite sparrow got totaled along with the old Tower, but it’s past time to get over it and find a new favorite ride.”

“…You know what? You’re right… I should start a classic sparrow collection.”

“Traveler’s crack, that’s not what I meant…”

(Memesis Drive w/ Dead Orbit Resurrection)

one-berzerker  asked:

The Drifter learning to recognize guardians by the sound of their footsteps on the stairs to the courtyard; Gambit regulars or even a s/o.

Oh yes I like this, the Drifter listening out for his faves and then turning around and going “oh, hey” all casual, like he didn’t know it was you. There’s just something about that one Guardian he can’t quite stop thinking about and listening out for…