I hated you so much that I forgot about your good qualities. I forgot you even had good qualities. So when you came up to me, eagerness filling what awkward tension I’d created, I turned toward the other direction and gestured for you to follow me. Small talk became our normal, until you asked how sick I was, while you folded me into a hug and within a matter of half a second it hit me, this is what I’ve been missing out on. That void you created two years ago disappeared, and in replacement heartbreak took its place. Your hug didn’t convey sexual desire or wanting something more, but instead an undying passion and a need for the one person who truly knows you to stay. And I guess that’s what I’ve been needing, because you are the first in such a long time to comfort me with actions instead of words, the first to tighten your grasp around my waist instead on letting go when I started to get comfortable. The crease in your neck feels like home, a place where only you and I can escape. I"m not going to give you an “I love you” or “I want you back” because that’s far from how I feel, but I will say this: The moment you walked back in, the moment I started feeling the way I should. You’re far from what I want, but you know what I need. Denial had taken a place within my undeveloped mind for so long yet when it slipped away, the sudden realisation came to me that maybe you do know me better than I know myself, like you’d always exclaimed to me in moments of pure sadness. I don’t know whether it’s a good or bad thing, or whether I should be happy or not, and this may be the last time I write about you but please don’t leave. You’ve destroyed me in a matter of seconds, but you also know how to rebuild me. I am a mental catastrophe, a psychedelic mess, and I can’t bare people leaving anymore. Not when I have no one left.
Stop wasting your time with individuals who aren’t really all about you. Stop trying to force connections that aren’t all there, or telling yourself that maybe the reason love isn’t happening for you is because your expectations are too high. It’s not unrealistic to desire a partner that is attentive to your needs and wants, and who puts in the effort to not only get to know you, but keep you happy and feeling secure. Don’t compromise the things you value in a relationship for people who keep missing the mark. Your time could be much better spent. Some day someone is going to walk into your life and make you realize just why you should never settle, and they will be so bold and clear with their love that you’ll never have to think twice.
The Keys of Magic are a core principle shared by many different schools. While they may seem simple, the truth is that they can be challenging to master. Dedicate time to honing these foundational skills, and you’re sure to see results in your craft.
I’ve included here an explanation of each key, along with some of my personal tips and tricks for success.
It’s difficult to concentrate when you’re not comfortable. Minimizing distractions and developing an ability to focus through them will be essential. I’ve repeatedly insisted that meditation is the number one skill any witch or magician needs to master. This is one of the many reasons why. The importance of mental control seems like a no-brainer, but I’m always surprised by how often people neglect their meditation.
To begin, find a quiet and comfortable place to work where you are unlikely to be interrupted. Ground yourself, and clear your mind. Gradually allow all the tension to leave your body. From this empty, neutral position, begin to focus your will on your work.
As you gain experience, you should train by increasing your level of distraction. Practice relaxation and focus in places that aren’t ideal, so that you’re equipped to do even better. Cultivating your skills here will allow you to successfully work magic in less and less ideal situations, giving you an edge and the discipline necessary to be successful when it truly matters.
During your ritual, adopt a single minded focus. It’s not enough to express your desire, you need to see the thing you want as though it’s already come to pass. Instead of “I want a promotion at work”, think “I have been promoted”. See yourself receiving the promotion, feel the joy and satisfaction of your new role. Bask in your boss’ praise. To help make the thing real, try to engage all your senses. Imagine the way the place smells, what it tastes like, how it feels. What’s the quality of the light? What’s the soundscape like?
You must truly cement the thing as real in your mind. This key goes back to the Principle of Correspondence, if you’ve ever studied Hermetics. Even if you haven’t, you’re probably familiar with the phrase “as above, so below”. The continuation of that is, “as within, so without”. Make the thing real inside of you, so that in the next step it can become real outside of you. Take the time to sink into it. The solidness of this visualization will directly relate to the strength of the outcome.
This is easily the most difficult of the keys to master. In order for your magic to do any work, you first have to send it out into the world.
All that energy, focus and desire you built up during your ritual needs to be released. For this to happen, you’ll have to relinquish all attachment to your spell, along with any desire for a result.
To help with this, I keep a journal of my workings. Following each ritual, I record what I’ve done in a dedicated book, along with any details I consider significant. Depending on your craft, those details may include things like the moon phase and the position of certain stars, or they could be the entities you worked with and any offerings given. I also make a point of recording significant occurrences, such as candles that wouldn’t light, strange sounds, or a personal mistake (these happen). Because I trust the integrity of my recordings, I feel secure releasing my work. Transferring the memory from myself into the book is a symbolic activity that helps me detach from it.
My personal rule is not to return to that writing for three months. At that point, I’ll review the ritual and assess its effectiveness.
Sometimes, even after documenting the work and trying to release, I’ll come back to a spell and discover that it didn’t have the desired effect. At this point, I’ll concede failure and begin a retrospective. Shockingly, this final admission that the work did nothing sometimes has the power to complete the third step, causing your results to manifest. If you find your rituals aren’t resulting in an outcome you’re happy with, consider the possibility that you haven’t truly let go of them.
I throw the phone onto the couch, groaning in annoyance and stomping my feet like a child as I wander to the kitchen, huffing once more to catch Dylan’s attention. “What’s wrong?” He asks, his back still turned to me as he assorted popcorn and candy into different plastic tubs.
My shoulders slouch and I climb onto the island, crossing my legs and pulling an unsatisfied face. “Everyone’s busy, they can’t make it.” I grumble under my breath with furrowed eyebrows. Friday night was game night, everyone came over to my place to eat junk food, play stupid board games and get completely wasted. But, everyone decided they’d be busy this week, which couldn’t have been any more inconvenient.
If you want to live an authentic, meaningful life, you need to master the art of disappointing and upsetting others, hurting feelings, and living with the reality that some people just won’t like you. It may not be easy, but it’s essential if you want your life to reflect your deepest desires, values, and needs.