desi movies

2

I Can’t Think Straight (2008)

Context: Leyla, a Muslim British-Indian woman, is coming out to her mother, telling her “I’m gay.” Her mother reacts with horror and disgust, telling her “You’re up to your neck in sin” and going so far as to ask “Who did this to you?”

But it’s this scene that sums up the reality of LGBTQ+ desi youth. Our parents may very well love us and want the best for us, but the absolute bottom line is: our parents do not want us to be happy. They want us to be appropriate, to be respectful, to have children and well-earning careers, to fit into the mold of heteronormativity and gender roles, to be religious and pious. But no, they do not want us to be happy. Happiness doesn’t fit into it. To them, happiness is indistinguishable as a separate characteristic because according to them, doing all of these things should already be making us happy. The ideal created for desi children is that they shouldn’t strive to do what makes them happy, but what makes them “good.” Unfortunately, under this context, good is defined as anything that isn’t seen as immoral or out of the norm. 

A woman who is not straight is rejecting her role as a wife, and to a lesser extent, her role as a mother. She is rejecting the notion of subservience to men, of obedience and inferiority. Under our current system that is hugely patriarchal, a woman who does not submit is a threat. 

Now, I’m not saying desi parents are bad parents or hate their children because it’s pretty clear this happens in nearly every other culture in the world. But I am saying that desi parents do not make their children’s happiness a priority, they make their children’s success a priority: successful careers and marriages and children = successful lives. So if you ask a desi parent “do you want your kid to be happy?” they’ll immediately say “yes, of course.” But if you add on “do you want your kid to be gay if that makes them happy?” the answer will be a lot less positive.

This movie tackled Leyla’s sexuality and coming out to her parents absolutely head-on with no coyness about it. She goes straight up to her mother and admits that she’s a lesbian. But her mother’s reaction is really the thing that most “coming out” stories try to gloss over, or sugarcoat, or just in general avoid. Her mother admits with frank and brutal honesty the truth that all LGBTQ+ desi kids know: our parents would rather see us miserable and straight than queer and happy.

idk if it is just me who feels this, but watching sana and yousef’s lil … crush? (love) story? unfold …. feels so much different than the previous 3 seasons.

there hasn’t been much dialogue at all between them, its very very heavy on eye contact and lingering gazes and smiles and smirks.

and it just feels … pure? and wholesome? there’s been zero physical contact between them whatsoever, yet there’s /something/ there.

and it just looks and feels so … ours? like … how i usually see “love stories” in eastern media, in arab shows/movies and desi shows/movies, where the 2 love interests are standing far apart, having no chance of contact, but still conveying so much. being all coy and shy and sneaking looks and standing in doorways and catching them doing something, and then the both of them being so shy around each other.

it just feels so … different? and … /true to how love stories are portrayed in the east/.

if anyone is looking for a good movie to watch I highly recommend ‘Angry Indian Goddesses’ it’s on netflix and it has an all female cast (all women of colour actually). It addresses a lot of different issues and it does it really well!! 

some of the topics addressed:

  • catcalling
  • women in the film industry
  • r*pe/gang r*pe
  • gay women in india/gay women in general
  • working mothers
  • arranged marriage
  • suicide/mental illness

although there is no explicit r*pe scene, there is aftermath graphics and there are no trigger warnings so please only watch if you won’t be triggered obviously. if you feel you’ll be okay please check it out and show it some love. we need more movies like this one!

youtube

Lucy and Desi: A Home Movie (1993), Lucie Arnaz’s Emmy winning documentary about her parents, featuring personal home movies. This video is enlisted so you’ll need this link to view. I personally believe this is the most informative piece, movie or book, put out about them and their marriage. Enjoy! 

anonymous asked:

Who would you want to see cast as Kamala? If they were to make a movie. Just curious

any teenage girl with pakistani origin. tbh, right now im i dont know any actresses that fit that bill (teenage and pakistani) but im very sure they wont be hard to find.
there used to be a time where i would have accepted any south asian actress as kamala, but after reading ms marvel (2016) flashback issues i don’t want that anymore. a part of me is scared that when (yes when. this movie is happening, idc) marvel casts kamala, they’ll be okay with any south asian girl and while yes our cultures are similar, they are not inter-changeable, and being pakistani is important to kamala’s story. so i cant stress this enough how important it is for future kamala to be a) teenager b) of pakistani origin, and literally every thing else doesnt matter. 

8

Happy 76th Wedding Anniversary, Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz // November 30, 1940

Lucy and Desi spoke once more in the final days before his death on December 2, 1986. As Lucie remembers, “I got on the phone with my mother and said, ‘He’s barely speaking. He didn’t eat any of the dinner we fixed. He hasn’t eaten in three days. I don’t even know if he’ll understand what you’re saying, but I’ll put the phone up to his ear.’ She said, ‘Oh, okay.’ She was always trying to be so brave. You could hear her voice cracking. I put the phone up to Dad’s ear in the bed. And he gave me a look that said, ‘Who is it?’ And I said, ‘It’s the redhead.’ He just listened, and I heard what she said. She just said the same thing over and and over again. It was muffled, but you could clearly make out it was the same thing over and over again.

“It was, ‘I love you. I love you. Desi, I love you.’ You could even hear the intonations of the voice change, how she meant each one, the interpretations. And I just sat there, trying not to show him I was listening, because I had to hold the phone. I couldn’t get out of the room. He couldn’t hold the phone. And he said, ‘I love you, too, honey.’ Really, my mother was the last person he talked to, because he died about forty-eight hours later.”

“Until I went back into my little diary,” concludes Lucie, “I never put it together that the date this happened was November 30 - the same date as their wedding anniversary.”

5

Happy 76th Wedding Anniversary, Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz // November 30, 1940

“He would sit with me and cry. He would actually cry sometimes, talking about how much he loved her, and how terrible it was that they were divorced. And he loved her to his dying day.” -Marcella Rabwin

“I think of her everyday - even her voice echoes in my conscience. You can’t just erase your soulmate away.” -Desi Arnaz

“She visited him in Del Mar a week before he died. By this time his ailments included emphysema and the colostomy he’d had for a couple of years. Desi was out of it, disoriented. When it came time for Lucy to leave, Desi said, ‘Where are you going?’ ‘I’m going home,’ Lucy responded. ‘You are home,’ Desi said. So, Lucy stayed a while longer.” -William Asher

“At the end, we drove down to Del Mar, where she went to see Desi a few days before he died. She was very, very shook-up. She left that place and broke down and said, ‘That was the one love…’” -Lillian Briggs Winograd

[Quoting Lucy’s second husband, Gary Morton, following Lucy’s death] “I guess she’s happy now, she’s with Desi.” -Paula Stewart