deserving

Coliver Coda 3x11

“Will you spoon me?” Oliver asks soft and needy.

Connor looks around and agrees instantly as Oliver begins to adjust the pillows to lay down.

Connor wraps his arm around Oliver burying his nose in Oliver’s shoulder. God it had been so long he thought. So long since he smelled the familiar scent of Oliver. The scent of home.

He grips tighter when Oliver says “Don’t let go.”

Connor grins in his head. Couldn’t even if I tried. “I won’t” he whispers like a promise beyond today.

Minutes pass into hours and Connor just listens to Oliver cry. He wants to make it stop, he wants to end the pain, but he knows what he should have done is let go a long time ago. Before things got too complicated. But now, now there was no way in hell he was letting Oliver go.

Not because Oliver knew everything now, or that he was afraid of what might happen to him. But because, ever since the day they met, he couldn’t imagine his life without Oliver. He didn’t want to. And now, he didn’t have to-he thought. His grip around Oliver’s waist tightened and he let himself drift off. 

Hours later, Oliver finally stops crying and turns to face Connor. Connor begins to loosen his grip when Oliver says don’t and he quickly resumes his place.

“I’ve missed you Con. So much.” Oliver breathes

Connor struggles to untangle his arm as he reaches up to trace Oliver’s cheek “You have no idea Olls.” he says lost in the younger man’s eyes.

Oliver leans forward and lightly presses his lips to Connor’s. Connor stills for a moment but kisses back, sweet and tender, melting into the taste of Oliver’s lips once again. He tilts his head to the side only to taste the tear rolling down Oliver’s cheek.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispers

The younger man looks at him confused “For what?”

“For keeping me in the dark.”

Connor smiles gently, not sure whether it’s sarcastic or not.

“I mean it Connor. Thank you for letting me stay me, for as long as you could.”

Connor buries his nose in the crook of Oliver’s neck “I will always keep you in the light, Ollie. Always.

Dear Bestfriend

I’d like to start off my saying that I think the world of you. The absolute world. And I like to remind you of this because I think it’s so important that you know that at least one person out there thinks that. You’re beautiful. You have more courage than I’ll ever have and you’ve demonstrated more strength than I’ve ever felt. I envy your trust and your willingness to give people chances. I’m so happy that you’re in my life. I really don’t know what I’d do or where I’d be without you. You’re my rock, my laughter, my favorite person. And I love you more than I will ever be able to put into words. You’re incredible. Uniquely you! I want you to know how valuable you are to me. I want you to know how valuable you’ll be to someone else one day. You deserve to be treated with the utmost respect and care. I always catch myself watching you and thinking about how some guy is going to fall so in love with you. There’s so much about you to love. And I don’t want you to settle for anyone who doesn’t make you feel like you’re the most perfect gem in the world. I hope you find someone who would do anything for you. Someone you’ll always be able to count on. You deserve the world, and nothing less. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life. Thank you for letting me in. Thank you for making me laugh and talking to me! I’ll always be rooting for you! You are deserving of so much more than you’ve ever received! You’re worth it all! I love you so much! I hope you never forget how important you are to me!

There is nothing wrong with wanting attention. It doesn’t make you selfish. It doesn’t make you desperate or pathetic or weak. It makes you human. We all want to be noticed. We all need to feel seen and heard and valued. And we all deserve to have those needs met. You are no exception. You deserve to take up space. You deserve to be acknowledged and loved and cared for. You deserve to shine. Don’t let anyone, including yourself, convince you otherwise.
—  Daniell Koepke 
You really wanna know what
happened to us? I was sick of dealing
with all your confusion. Half of the
time we had was amazing, you
gave me butterflies and I was so
comfortable around you. But that was
only half the time. One you loved
me & the next it was like you couldn’t
even stand to be around me. I opened
my eyes, I don’t deserve someone like
you and honestly, I feel so sorry for
the next girl because she will be left
broken.
—  Unknown
I’ve heard so many stories about me now that I don’t know which one is the most popular. But I do know which is the least popular: the truth. See, the truth isn’t always the most exciting version of things, or the best or the worst; it’s somewhere in between. But it deserves to be heard and remembered. The truth will out, like someone said once; it remains.
—  Hannah Baker, 13 Reasons Why

If you have forgotten what you deserve — let me remind you.
You deserve someone asking you to slow dance on a weeknight in the street.
You deserve someone unapologetically pouring their heart out to you.
You deserve flowers sent to your office.
You deserve being a part of their entire world, not being their best-kept secret.
You deserve Sunday morning where they want you to stay.
You deserve to never feel badly for saying what you think and feel.
You deserve someone who wants to be there, not someone who is bored.
You deserve sleeping next to someone who leaves you whole, not lying next to a stranger that
makes you feel lonely.
You deserve someone who wants to go to the ends of the earth to be with you, not someone who
makes you go all the way alone. Because relationships are 50/50. Remember that.
You deserve to have someone helps carry the burdens life throws at you. Because life struggles
were never meant to be endured alone.
You deserve someone drying your tears, never causing them.
You deserve all these things. You just have to be brave enough to ask for them.
Please, my dear, life is too short and you are too young, you are too beautiful, you are too worth
it to settle for anything less than extraordinary. And I know you question if it’s out there, but it
is. It’s waiting for you.
Listen — soulmates are real, and love is something you can believe in. Promise me that you will
believe in it. Promise me that you will never settle.

(Source: thoughtcatalog.com)

~(으)ㄹ 만하다

There are four ways of using the grammar point  ~(으)ㄹ 만하다.

1. Firstly, it can imply a meaning of ‘worth doing’ and is used to give/ask for recommendations. Often used together with ‘정말’ 

서울의 인사동은 한 번 구경할 만하다. 

이 영화가 정말 볼 만해요.

가: 요즘 무슨 영화가 재미있어요? 

나: 이 코미디 영화가 재미있는데 한 번 볼 만해요.

2. Secondly, while the speaker is not completely satisfied, the action is still ‘doable’, ‘bearable’. Often used together with ‘아직’ or ‘그냥’. 

한국어는 배울 만하니?

이 가방은 아직 쓸 만해요.

아프지만 아직 참을 만해요. 

며칠 전에 만든 음식인데 아직은 먹을 만한 것 같다.

3. Thirdly, used when someone is deserving of good or bad things. 

그 선생님은 상을 받을 만해요.

맞을 만해서 때렸지만…

4. Lastly, it can express that the reason for doing something is understandable.

그 사람은 인기가 있을 만해요.