derranged

FYI

for those interested in being accountable and attentive to the language they use and the way it affects mentally disabled and/or neurodivergent populations (and you should be):

the term ‘mad’ as in angry or enraged, and ‘mad’ meaning ‘mentally derranged’ share a common etymology. accordingly, all terms which derive from them, including, ‘to madden’, ‘maddening,’ or ‘maddeningly’ share in this ambiguity. Whether or not use of these terms is ableist will largely depend on context. It may be possible to use the word ‘maddening’, for example, to describe something as enraging, frustrating, or infuriating, without an ableist implication. However, given the ambiguity, it seems that more often than not the safest route is to substitute other words, such as ‘to anger’, ‘upset’, ‘enraging/infuriating’, etc.

from what i’m able to understand from an online dictionary, the original root of this word meant ‘foolish’, although it has been used to mean ‘angry’ since at least the 1300s.

Just a thought

One thing I am not ashamed to admit is whenever I talk to my best friend, I feel so much better and glad I can do the same for her. That girl means a lot to me and I’d do anything for her if I am able to. We had our fair shares of ups and downs but we always manage to work it out. We  speak our minds to each other and what we feel, we do not lead the other one on with bullshit. One thing that makes us close is she understands my silence as I her, she respects when I need time for myself because she is the same way. We hate being up each others ass all the time and if you ask me, that is a perfect friendship. I been so down and I feel bad because I have not tried to reach out to her as often as I should, I guess it is because there is just so much shit going on in my life and I admit my pride is to big for rejection, I hate calling someone and get ignored or they say they’re too busy for me, it really pushes me away, I know sometimes they may not mean it like that, but that is just my fucked up mind playing tricks on me. I guess it bothers me because I feel I am making time for them and trust when I say, I am always busy!!!! So that is why I never make effort to really call anyone anymore. I told her this today and She understands and I can say I am grateful to have such loyal people in my life because I am not easy to love. I have ways of getting under ones skin, at least I admit it, so if you’re just as fucked up and not very loveable, than we will get along fine ;)