Tips for dealing with Denial

I don’t know if other systems deal with this regularly, but the denial of the condition and feeling fake is something that we struggle with. Here’s a few things we tend to do in order to help soothe it, I’d be happy if others added to the list too :) 

  • write notes to each other, leave journal entries for each other 
  • record yourselves talking about how your day went 
  • get a calendar, and each time an alter comes out mark it - that way you can see how often you guys come out 
  • if you have someone you trust who knows about your condition, let them reassure you (if your relationship to them is suitable for this)
  • be calm, and remember that feeling fake / dealing with denial is natural 
  • set up little “stations” for everyone, some alters can put their favorite pens or books in a certain drawer or on a particular shelf 
  • try to gently remind yourself that the things you’ve experienced are valid, and that your system is valid 

Sorry if this sounds poopy, it’s late but we felt like writing something potentially helpful to someone out there. Goodnight lovelies!

x Fel

I just bought my first full length mirror for my room (like ever in life). And im so used to looking at myself head to chest (or just my face) that I look really foreign to myself… like i really really dont recognize myself and its fucking me up. Like damn i know im tall and skinny but fuckkkkkkkkkk I cant believe this is what I really look like! This is what other people see! This is so fucking unreal! I dont like it!!!

Types of dissociation

1. Amnesia - this is when you can’t remember incidents or experiences that happened at a particular time, or when you can’t remember personal information.

2. Depersonalisation - a feeling that your body is unreal, changing or dissolving. It also involves out of body experiences, such as seeing yourself as if watching a movie or floating above.

3. Derealisation - the world around you seems unreal. You may see objects changing in shape, size or colour, or you may feel that other people are robots or generally unreal.

4. Identity confusion - feeling uncertain about who you are. You may feel as if there is a struggle within to define yourself.

5. Identity alteration - this is when there is a shift in your role or identity that changes your behaviour in ways that others would notice.

Neurotypical: I can do stuff like leave my house and eat three meals a day!!!
Me: yeah but can you do this? *dissociates for three hours*