dennis herring

the gang's tumblr blogs

dee: a bunch of liberal posts and platitudes that she doesn’t actually believe, but maintains because she doesn’t want to get called out. still has #imwithher in her sidebar

dennis: “classy” porn and sketchy politics, his description reads something like: “I appreciate logic and the female form. Welcome to an erotic place with no rules. Feel free to submit pictures..”

mac: likes conservative memes and unironically reblogs warriormale and muscle morphing images without realizing they’re sexual

charlie: follows every animal vendor blogger he can find and actually thinks they’re real. he posts a lot of his art and pictures of his apartment, which often go viral on tumblr as “cursed images” which yields him more followers than any other member of the gang

frank: creepy old man porn blog who adds captions to every single post he reblogs, kinda like meatgod. he’ll often message women unprompted for sex and get blocked instantly

Let’s talk about a cat who spent a whole day waiting on a wall, while everyone else was celebrating, because she had heard something and she couldn’t believe it. Because people were laughing for the first time in years, and all she wanted to do was cry.

Let’s talk about a teacher who was strict and severe, but fair and caring. A woman who fought for her students until the very end, with her green robes and stern look, three silver cats flying out of her wand. And they fought for her too.

Let’s talk about Minerva McGonagall.

When Minerva McGonagall saw Harry for the first time, she didn’t see his mother living in his green eyes, like Severus would. She didn’t see James’ ghost in his shy smile, like Sirius; or a hero to be shaped by manipulative hands, like Albus. She didn’t even see an orphan, like the rest of the world did. She didn’t see the boy who lived. She just saw a boy, her student, and for her, that was enough.

Minerva McGonagall survived a war and all that came after. The funerals and the sorrow, but also the laughter that was back. She survived the ghosts and the mourning. She let her heart break over Lily’s death, her hands shaking because James would never make another joke; a sharp, disappointed pain over Sirius’ betrayal (they had been her students. They had been her children) and then she collected the pieces and moved on. It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, Albus said once. And she didn’t dwell on dreams. She was stone and she would not shatter.

She survived a war, and, when she had already buried the dead and forgotten the nightmares, another one came. And she survived it too. She was a rock, and rocks may be weathered, but they don’t break.

When Fred and George Weasley abandoned the school, leaving behind a trail of cheers, admirers and laughter, and a petition (give her hell for us, Peeves), Minerva saw Umbridge’s fury and Peeves’ bow, and hid a smile in the corner of her lips. When Neville Longbottom came to her office, asking for advice, with his clumsy hands and a respectful fear in his eyes, she offered him a biscuit and some tea, and she gave him reassurance with her stern frown and her steady voice.

When Remus Lupin became the DADA teacher, she invited him to her office. She offered him biscuits too, some chocolate this time. They talked for a long time, about old times and forgotten joys, about four friends and their mischiefs and pranks. They looked back on their bets and their antics, their hopes and their dreams. They didn’t talk about death, not that evening, and the Marauders came back to life in that room, their voices rising and stealing pieces of a future they hadn’t gotten to live. They also talked about their students, homework and assignments, because they were teachers after all, and that was something worth remembering.

She gave him a knitted jumper for Christmas. He gave her a box of chocolates. Years later, she would stand by his grave and leave a single flower on it. A flower for the boy she’d known and the man he’d become. The man who was kind and quiet and healing. The man she’d like to have gotten to know better.

Albus died then, a shout and a blaze of green light. A fall, and it was all over. It felt like the end of an age. “Are the rumours true?”, she had asked, once upon a time. Now she wanted to ask Harry the same thing, trying to keep her voice from shaking, because Albus Dumbledore couldn’t be dead, could he? But then again, James and Lily couldn’t have been, either, and yet they had been, they were.

When the Second Wizarding War began, she stayed at the school. She kept teaching, because she was a teacher and she would not let them take that from her. Because her students were there, and she wouldn’t leave them alone. She wouldn’t let them die, all those brave children, if she could do something to save them. She wasn’t like Albus, who had prepared himself to sacrifize a boy in the name of the greater good. A boy’s life for the sake of the world.

After the Battle of Hogwarts, there was a destroyed castle and ashes. Minerva stumbled when she saw George’s desperation and Fred’s frozen smile. She wanted to cry when she came across Lavender’s body. She finally collapsed to her knees, when she found Colin Creevey. She had seen him this still, once before. But there were no mandrake leaves to save him, not this time. He was too young. He shouldn’t have been fighting a war, the brave and naïve boy.

Pomona Sprout kneeled next to her then, and Minerva sobbed on her shoulder.

“A boy”, she cried. “He was a boy, he was a child. Children, they were children.”

Pomona let her weep, and then she said,

“There are children here still. They are alive, and they need you, and more will come, and you’ll be there. And you’ll be fine.”

And she was right. Minerva collected the pieces once again, and she moved on. She sent a box of chocolates to Dennis Creevey, as Remus would have done, because he was so much better at being kind than her. Than any of them, really. Dennis sent her a photograph, an old picture of Albus and her, the Weasley twins laughing in the background. She met Molly Weasley for tea, and they shared anecdotes. And she went back to Hogwarts and she kept teaching, because she was a teacher before anything else. She became the new headmaster. The best one of them all.

Some years later, Neville Longbottom knocked at her door, asking for a job. She remembered all the times he had come, asking for advice with his stammering voice. She remembered the way he had led the resistance, the way he had stood up and defied the ones who had made his parents lose their minds. The way he had worked hard and stubborn, never giving up. She offered him a biscuit and some tea. She had never felt so proud.

When he left, she went through some papers. She looked up and the portrait of Albus Dumbledore winked at her. She smiled and went back to work.

When Teddy Lupin arrived at Hogwarts for the first time, expectation in his eyes and bright colours in his hair, he was nothing like the other orphan who had stared at her once upon a time, the one who had had skinny elbows and broken glasses. Teddy Lupin wasn’t looking for a family, he already had one. But, as she had done before, she saw another student, and for her, that was enough.

She was a teacher. Students were her children. And she was their rock.

i cant believe ive drawn so many philadelphia girls today

“Dennis’ Double Life” Defense & Explanations

In this post, I’ll attempt to explain/defend all of the controversial scenes in the Season 12 finale, “Dennis’ Double Life.” This write-up has helped me to appreciate the episode a lot better and it might help some people who have mixed feelings about the episode to view it in a different light.

NOTE: This is a mix of speculation and canon evidence.

Question 1: Why was Dennis a butt to Mac the entire episode, especially after he was so nice to him at the end of “The Gang Tends Bar”?

Answer 1: I will break this answer into three parts:

  • Part 1: I got the vibe that Mandy surprised Dennis with the visit, which explains why Dennis had mere seconds to tell the Gang to pretend that he was someone else. With the flesh-and-blood reality of Brian Jr. on his mind, I don’t think he had the mental energy to consider Mac at all. (In “The Gang Tends Bar,” Brian Jr. wasn’t there, so Dennis didn’t feel that immediate/strong pressure. Also, Dennis was emotionally vulnerable and available after having told the Gang about his “big feelings,” so he was able to react better to Mac)
  • Part 2: I’m not sure Dennis fully comprehends Mac’s feelings for him. I think he knows, to some degree, that Mac is attracted to him, but it wouldn’t surprise me if he sees Mac’s attraction to him as a kind of strange “hero worship.” Dennis verbally confirmed that Mac is gay in “Mac Day,” but he constantly acts weirded out or confused when Mac does/says something that shows that he has feelings for him. For example, in “Mac & Dennis Move to the Suburbs,” Dennis thought it was weird that Mac would name their dog Dennis Jr. That reaction, of course, mirrors Dennis’ reaction to Mac’s reveal that he perfectly recreated their old apartment. I don’t think he was trying to hurt Mac. He just flat out does not understand why Mac would go through all the trouble.
  • Dennis also doesn’t appear to understand his own feelings for Mac. He has asked Mac to “get off with him” (a “mostly sexual” manipulation game) and tried to get him to participate in a threesome with a male golf caddy in “Frank’s Back in Business,” admitted to Dee that he made his sex tapes for himself and Mac in “The Gang Group Dates,” stated that he has a thing with Mac where he picks out porn for them that he doesn’t want Charlie to join in on (“The Gang Spies Like U.S.”), and danced for Mac when he saw him avidly watching him in “PTSDee,” but he doesn’t see anything strange about this. It’s just par for the course in their relationship.
  • If Dennis has trouble seeing his own feelings, then like hell is he going to fully see Mac’s feelings. And if he can’t see Mac’s feelings, he can’t deal with them properly. 
  • Part 3: In the back of Dennis’ mind, he was seriously considering leaving the Gang and being a father to his son. He knows that leaving the Gang is going to hurt him, so he emotionally pushed them away. When the Gang becomes “lesser” in his mind, it doesn’t hurt as much to leave them.

Summary: Dennis was stressed the heck out about Brian Jr. and didn’t have the energy to deal with his relationship with Mac.

Question 2: Were Mac’s feelings for Dennis treated as a joke?

Answer 2: Not necessarily. Even though Dennis likes to act like he’s the smartest member of the Gang, Mac is clearly more aware and accepting of the nature of their relationship than Dennis is. Mac was 100% fine with them pretending to be a couple and raising Brian Jr. (with or without Mandy), not because he’s super desperate and lovesick, but because, no matter what they call their relationship (lovers, partners, pretend, friends), they’d still be together. Mac just loves being with Dennis and wants to help solve Dennis’ problem, so, of course, that would be his plan. (And it’s actually a good plan.)

It hurts the empathetic audience members to see Mac treated the way he is by Dennis, but it’s normal Dennis behavior that Mac has accepted. Mac has survived his internalized homophobia, his father’s dislike of him, his mother’s indifference to him, and the Gang’s occasional dislike of him. Mac is stronger than we think he is. And if he gets tired of Dennis, he definitely has the strength to walk away from their relationship relatively unscathed.

Summary: Mac was pretty much having fun playing a character (he even wanted his character’s name to be Griffin) and hanging out with Dennis and Dennis was stressed the hell out about Brian Jr.

Question 3: Charlie wanted to have sex? With The Waitress?

Answer 3: Yes. In “Charlie Has Cancer,” Charlie was visibly disappointed when he realized that he missed the chance to possibly have sex with The Waitress. In “Who Pooped the Bed?” a drunk Waitress stated that she would get drunker and bang a random dude and Charlie asked her if it could be him. In "The High School Reunion Part 2: The Gang’s Revenge,” when a drunk Waitress told the Gang that she’d bang the next person who talked to her, Charlie opened his mouth and stepped forward, but Schmitty came out of nowhere and The Waitress went home with him.

Summary: I know some people headcanon Charlie as ace and/or sex-repulsed (I personally headcanon him as gray ace) and that’s fine, but Charlie has expressed interest in having sex with The Waitress in the show.

Question 4: Why did the Waitress have sex with Charlie?

Answer 4: Surprisingly, the possibility of that happening was set up in a previous episode. In "Charlie and Dee Find Love,” (which was written by RCG) the Waitress reacted in an arguably jealous manner towards Charlie’s then-girlfriend Ruby (“Who the hell is this, Charlie?!”). Also, at the end of the episode, the Waitress told Charlie that she needed him in her life and that she was thinking about reducing his restraining order. Admittedly, the Waitress’ strange behavior was after Frank accidentally put rat poison in her shampoo (which made her sick) and hit her with his car (which put her in a hospital), so she could have some kind of permanent brain damage.

In the beginning of the show, the Waitress wasn’t attracted to Charlie, but was concerned about his well-being sometimes. (In "The Gang Gives Back,” she tried to help Charlie with his alcoholism) It’s possible that after “Charlie and Dee Find Love,” the Waitress’ view of Charlie started to change. As the years went on, the Waitress’ problems started to get worse and worse, and, like Cricket (her male counterpart), she still found herself continually drawn to the Gang. Even though she still thinks Charlie’s a mess, a part of her might think that he’s all that she has left. (And that might, sadly, be true) And, if Charlie can help her to fulfill her dream of having a baby, maybe things can get better for her.

Something I noticed as well is that the Waitress never said she loved Charlie back. It’s possible that she still doesn’t love Charlie and never will, but sees him simply as a partner that can help her to take care of her child. (Also, in order to get Frank’s money, she needs to be partnered with Charlie)

Question 5: What’s the deal with The Waitress acting the way she did after having sex with Charlie?

Answer 5: We don’t know that much about The Waitress, but we do know that she sometimes does/thinks weird stuff like the rest of the Gang. (In "Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom,” The Waitress slept with Frank, a man she’s not attracted to at all, in an attempt to get back at Dennis because she thought he was cheating on her with older women. In “Charlie and Dee Find Love,” it’s hinted at that The Waitress might be stalking Dennis because she has his phone number even though he changed it. In “The Gang Group Dates,” after years of Dennis’ mistreatment of her, The Waitress was still excited about possibly being Dennis’ girlfriend.) Also, even though she was kind of aggressive towards Charlie, all of her points were valid, some of Charlie’s responses were dumb, and her dislike of Charlie is totally understandable.

Question 6: What’s the deal with Charlie freaking out after finally getting The Waitress’ attention?

Answer 6: Surprisingly, the possibility of that happening was set up in a previous episode. In Season 9’s "Flowers for Charlie,” Frank paid The Waitress to hang out with Charlie because he was getting worried about him after he started taking “intelligence” pills for an experiment. When the Waitress began talking about her life, Charlie immediately started getting annoyed, started hearing a ringing in his head, and had to leave. We found out at the end of the episode that these pills were placebos. Basically, this was a strong hint that Charlie might be in love with the idea of The Waitress, not the actual person. So, even though he has been stalking The Waitress for 15 years, he might not really want to be with the real her. (The fact that he thought of The Waitress’ negative reactions as a “game between them” is another hint, of course)

Also, even though Charlie fantasized about raising multiple children with The Waitress in “The Gang Saves the Day” (which aired before “Flowers for Charlie”), it was still a fantasy. Charlie might fantasize about having a nice house, a wife, and children, but he still likes living in his unfancy and dangerous apartment and doesn’t handle stress well. There are huge conflicts that he doesn’t see.

Also, keep in mind that he came up with the plan only a few hours earlier and he mentioned that he wanted to get The Waitress pregnant so she would be tied to him for life. (clearly no thought about the actual baby and being a father)

So, with Charlie being Charlie and the reality of the situation crashing on him, he is starting to freak out.

Summary: Charlie freaking out is 100% in character.

Question 7: Why was Charlie a butt to Dee after having sex with The Waitress?

Answer 7: Charlie is an idiot and a misogynist, so he projected his issues with women and The Waitress onto Dee. Also, as Charlie mentioned, Dee possibly tried to have sex with him an additional time after “The Gang Misses the Boat” and he didn’t want that to happen again that night. So, overly-stressed and tired Charlie absentmindedly begged Dee not to be a whore numerous times before immediately falling asleep on top of her because even though he has issues with women, he feels comfortable with Dee.

Summary: Charlie and Dee’s relationship in a nutshell.

Question 8: Why did Dennis want to leave the Gang to take care of Brian Jr.?

Answer 8: I get the vibe that this might have been the first time that Dennis actually held Brian Jr. (or he hasn’t held him in a while?). Holding the child made him really understand that he is a living, breathing being he created and not just an obstacle to overcome to get back to his usual life. And then the child knew who he was, which made everything feel even more heavy. This is the first time in Dennis’ life that he’s been responsible for someone other than himself. He knows that if he stays with the Gang, he’ll feel guilty for whatever happens to the child. He’ll feel guilty that the child knew who he was but couldn’t see him. And the fact that the Gang doesn’t comprehend this at all (Mac, for example, excitedly told him “The plan worked!”) pushed him even further away from them and towards his child.

Question 9: Why didn’t the Gang seem to care when Dennis left?

Answer 9: The Gang has a great track record of unusual responses to deaths and departures.

In “Dennis and Dee’s Mom Is Dead,” Dennis reacted to his mother’s death by partying/hazing guys in his mom’s house and Dee and Frank seriously considered grave robbing her. In "The Gang Gets a New Member,” Mac and Dennis had no problem kicking Charlie out of the Gang and replacing him with Schmitty. In "The Gang Beats Boggs,” Mac’s only response to a drunk Dennis spontaneously leaving their plane was to write the number of beers he consumed on his forehead. In "The Gang Misses the Boat,” the Gang “broke up,” yet everyone just spent the episode doing their own thing. In "Frank Retires,” the rest of the Gang started cheering and clapping after Frank declared that he would be retiring from the Gang. I could go on and on, but you get the point.

It’s very likely that the rest of the Gang is still in shock/denial about Dennis leaving and they are expecting him to come back soon like everyone always does.

Since the highlight of the night was firing Dennis’ RPG, they decided to not let Dennis’ departure stop them. (It also doubled as a nice, fiery distraction)

As for blowing up the Range Rover? They think Dennis intentionally left it and it’s the perfect target to take out any frustrations they had/have with Dennis. (This is also one of the reasons Mac, who gave Dennis his cherished RPG, is the one blowing up the Range Rover, one of Dennis’ most prized possessions)

When Dennis comes back, they can excitedly tell him that they blew up the Range Rover and it was awesome.

Question 10: Why did Dennis leave the Range Rover?

Answer 10: Dennis wants to take care of his child, which is a good thing, but he is clearly going through a crisis and is not thinking clearly. He mentally/emotionally disconnected himself from the Gang (notice that he said “The bar’s done” and turned off the lights even though the rest of the Gang is still there and can run the bar) and left everything that reminds him of the Gang behind (which explains why the Range Rover is still there). He did not even think about packing, called a taxi, and headed straight to the airport to fly to Mandy and Brian Jr.’s location. This is one of the reasons the ending feels so “off.” It mirrors Dennis’ mindset.

Question 11: Why did Dennis name his child after Brian Lefevre?

Answer 11: This was probably Mandy’s idea and Dennis went along with it because he couldn’t think of anything else. He also probably wasn’t in the right headspace to complain since he wasn’t ready to have a child.