demons in my sleep

2

I was just going to make a fun little sketch but 2 hours later I ended up with this.

How these things keep happening beats me, but here she is and I hope you enjoy.

(Some extra versions where I was playing around with stuff under the cut)

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It is your voice
I imagine in the dark
and your silhouette I see
when it feels like
the demons in my chest
are rising again.
—  // ‘sing me to sleep, I don’t want to wake up on my own anymore’
j.d.m.

Tired of waiting. Facing the darkness again. Nothing is fair or the way it should be, maybe I simply just don’t deserve much. I guess I set my expectations too high. I thought I was better. I wanted too much. Thought I was worth something. I thought I could be something, a somebody, but instead I’m a man on the edge, each step I get closer to losing my mind. Nothing is fair & why should it be…
Give me peace. Let me sleep.

I can’t draw at all but I saw the episodes of season 2 and I couldn’t resist. Sorry for burdening all you guys with this awful art work haha

Noticed a trend with my doodles though. I keep drawing them with my favorite couples or characters holding a ds and either playing pokemon or mario kart. It’s a problem.

(Secretly though, I would love to do this with someone I love or is currently dating. It’d be great.)

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Day #123: All of Me

“When I first came here, I didn’t think I would stay. I was ambitious, power-hungry, and mean, and I did a lot of things I’m not proud of. A few good friends showed me the error of my ways, but it was you, Twilight, who taught me the most important lesson of all. I don’t need to be any of those things, ever again, because with you by my side I can do absolutely anything. You keep me grounded, you keep me safe, and you make me happier than I have been in my entire life. I vow to love and care for you, Twilight, and I will follow you to the ends of the earth, and far, far beyond.

But I vow to do it, even when it isn’t easy. I vow to be with you through the tough times and the rough patches. And even though things might not always be smooth sailing, I vow to work through all our problems together. I also promise to pour the milk for your cereal for you and try to help you when you’re doing one of your nightly planning sessions, even if you say you don’t want me, because I vow to understand you, even if we might be worlds apart. And while I can vow and promise a lot of things, there’s one thing I swear I’ll always be.

Twilight Sparkle, even if we’re married, I vow to always be your friend.”

-

“I knew there was something magic about you the first time we met, Sunset, but it took me a while to figure out exactly what it was. You took a shy, nervous girl who talked to her dog and made me who I am today: the happiest girl in this or any world. Without you around I don’t think I would even recognise myself anymore. You’ve saved me, Sunset, from the walls I built around myself, from a cruel and malevolent, world, and from my own demons. I sleep soundly, now, knowing that you’re right next to me and that I’m going to wake up next to you for the rest of my life. You’re beautiful, strong, and I love you more than words can ever express.

I vow to give my heart to you, because I’m certain you’ll keep it safe. I vow to let you handle some of my spreadsheets when needed and give you the cold side of the pillow. Well, sometimes. No matter what might happen, what crazy things we might argue with, I vow to be by your side and stand with you, not against you. I vow to give you the kindness you’ve shown me for so long. And while all those might just be words for now, I vow to make them true with my actions. I vow to love you, and I vow to be your friend till the end.”

[Vows written by the glorious @bestshipisfriendship & @deathscar. I’m not good at the sappy stuff, thanks guys!]

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Paranormal Activity

Summary: Tony wants to watch Paranormal Activity. What could possibly go wrong?

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Language

A/N: My wifi is still wacky, plus my daughter is sick today, so I’ve mostly just been taking care of her.

Originally posted by vibraniumdoll

When Steve brought Bucky to the tower for the first time since the events of the Sokovia Accords, everything was a little awkward for a while. Everyone on Team Iron Man was a little on edge around him, after all, it was kinda his fault everything fell apart. Not intentionally of course, no one ASKS to be used as an assassin for some crazy world domination group. He was unfortunate enough to be that person, however. I am new around here, Tony heard about me after he found Peter and since he was down several members of the avengers, he hunted me down. I agreed, and slowly but surely, the original members of the Avengers have made their way back home. With a few handshakes, pats on the back and some apologies, everything seems to be going smooth. When Bucky shows up, everyone tenses up. It’s like they tread softly around him, afraid he’ll revert back into the winter soldier, I assume. I don’t want to be that way though, so I’ve done my damndest to NOT be that person.

-

It’s early morning, around 5AM. I’m never up this early, but for some reason, sleep just didn’t come to me easy last night, so I figured might as well get up. Padding into the kitchen, I see Cap, Birdman, and…Bucky…I don’t have a nickname for him yet. He can’t be Tinman, no because that’s Tony! They’re all in their running attire. Steve in that grey under armor shirt, and running shorts. Sam in a black long sleeve shirt and shorts. Bucky..he’s in a black tank top, showcasing his arm. I’m sure he only does that in the early morning, when no one else is around, along with black sweats.

Me? I’m in my night shirt that goes to my knees, and some shorts. I haven’t even brushed my hair yet. Sam starts laughing, like hands on his knees because he can’t support himself standing anymore.

“Oh man, (Y/N)! You look like hell!” I glare at him, flipping him the bird, no pun intended.

“Fuck off, Wilson.” Steve chokes on his water, then wipes his chin.

“Language, (L/N).” I glare at Steve now.

“Fuck off, Rogers.” Bucky chuckles, I don’t know if it’s from my attitude, or Steve’s reaction.

“What? Not gonna tell Barnes to fuck off too?” Sam pokes my side, like he’s trying to get a rise outta me.

“No, why would I? He hasn’t said anything to piss me off yet.” Sam rolls his eyes.

“How? His entire presence pisses me off.” He side smirks at Barnes. He’s just playing, kinda, but it’ll get to Bucky either way.

“Fuck off, Wilson.” Bucky has quite the mouth on him too. I could get used to hi dirty talking ways. I turn on my heel to look at Steve. He’s leaning against the counter with his head in his hands.

“What? Not gonna tell Barnes to watch his language too?” He looks up at me out of the corner of his eye, then shakes his head. Bucky comes to stand next to me, I can feel the cold from his metal arm radiating off of him.

“No, he know’s I’d kick his ass if he tried.” I laugh, the first laugh of the day, and it didn’t even sound forced.

“Whatever, jerk. Are you guys coming or not? I’ve ran by myself in the morning, I can do it again” Steve is out the door with Sam, leaving Buck behind. Bucky turns to look at me before going out the door.

“You gonna be joining us, doll?” He speaks to me while walking backwards. Is it bad I find myself wishing he’d run into something?

“Are you kidding? There’s no way, I’m still in my pajamas.” He chuckles, walking out the door. That was my first actual conversation with the ex Winter Soldier.

-

Ever since then I think Bucky came to the conclusion that I’m not afraid of him, and kinda follows me around like a puppy, but I’m not complaining.

It’s movie night at the Tower, we hold these every week or so, depending on missions. I usually wear my pajamas these gatherings, so I’m trying to decide if I should go long sleeves or short.

“Hey Buck, should I go short sleeve or long sleeve?” I peak my head out of my bathroom, trying to get his attention. He’s sprawled out across my bed, reading some book or something.

He sits up, running his metal hand through his hair. God this man is beautiful. I can’t help but want him so much, in every way possible.

“I don’t care doll, it’s not like we’re going anywhere, just be comfortable.” I nod, putting on my long sleeved, open back grey pajama set with black shorts, and throwing my hair into a high ponytail. When I leave the bathroom, Buck is standing by the door.

“Ready, doll?” I smile, running up to him.

“Yup! Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know what movie is playing do you?”

“Yeah, Paranormal Activity.” I freeze. Oh no. I hate paranormal movies.

He raises his eyebrow, turning around to look at me, still frozen in place.

“Why? What’s wrong with it?” I sigh.

“I don’t know, I hate movies about ghosts…I hate them.” He chuckles.

“A couple weeks ago we watched Friday the 13th and you had no problems there.” He walks up to stand next to me, wrapping his metal arm around my waist, pulling me towards the theatre room.

“I know, I have no problem watching movies where there’s a physical threat, I don’t however like watching movies where you can’t see your attacker, you can’t defend yourself against it, there’s no way to protect yourself against a demon. I hate movies like that…” He chuckles, his arm still around my waist.

“Don’t worry doll, I’ll keep you safe.” I roll my eyes, thinking about saying something snarky, but I really do want him to stay by my side. What? Everyone has an irrational fear, this one just happens to be mind, don’t make fun of me!

Halfway through the movie, and I’m already a terrified mess. Knees up to my chest in the chair, face buried in the pillow perched on my knees. Bucky seems to be more interested in me, having a panic attack, than the movie.

“You alright, doll?” I jump, accidently kicking Nat’s chair, in front of me. She turns around, rubbing the back of her head.

“Didn’t realize (Y/N) was such a scaredy cat.” The blush that heats up my face, must have been a sight, so I kick the back of her seat again.

“Fuck off, Romanoff.” She laughs and rolls her eyes.

“Bucky! Tell her to fuck off in Russian for me!” He looks towards Nat, smirking,

“Отъебись.” I laugh, sticking my tongue out at her. She rolls her eyes, turning her attention back to the movie. For the next 30 minutes or so, I have the pillow up and over my eyes, peeking every once in awhile.

At the end of the movie, when the main character runs towards the camera with demon teeth happens, I shout and practically jump into Bucky’s arms. He laughs, putting his arms around me. Everyone laughs, seems I’m the only one here that doesn’t like paranormal movies.

“So, I vote to watch more ghost movies in the future.” Tony stands up, smirking in my direction.

“Shut up, Tony. I don’t think so.” He laughs, grabbing his phone and leaving the theatre room. Bucky stands up, taking me with him in his arms.

“Don’t worry doll, I’ll protect you from the demons.” I roll my eyes as he carries me to my room.

-

Sitting on my bed, I find myself looking around every corner. It’s 2:30 in the morning and I have all my lights on. Even the slightest sound freaks me out. Deciding I don’t want to be alone I text the only person I know for sure will be awake at this time.

“Buck? Are you awake?” He responds almost immediately.

“Yeah doll. Can’t sleep? Dreams of demons getting to you?” I roll my eyes in annoyance.

“Отъебись, Barnes. I went all the way to google translate to figure out how to say that.”

I can almost hear the laugh I know erupted from his throat.

“Mmm, alright ya got me. What can I do for you, doll?”

“I don’t want to be alone….can you come up to my room? And please don’t try to scare me…I don’t think my heart could take it.” It takes him a few minutes to respond, maybe getting dressed.

“On my way, doll.” Bucky is only down the hall, so it shouldn’t take him a couple seconds to get here. I stand up when I hear the door open, running out to greet him. When I see him, he’s in sweats and a black long sleeve shirt. He smiles at me, he looks just as tired as I’m sure I do.

“Why weren’t you asleep, Bucky?” He chuckles, coming up to me, putting his flesh arm around my waist.

“I knew you’d probably text me…I wanted to be awake when you did.” My face heats up.

“Y-You were waiting for me?” He smiles, his bloodshot eyes are soft, and gentle.

“Yeah..is that weird?” I smile, running to him and jumping into his arms, pressing my lips to his. Wrapping my arms around his neck, and he puts his hands on my waist as he kisses me back, running his fingers along my waist. When I pull away, his eyes are blown wide, and he licks his lips.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time…” I find myself admitting to him.

“I-I’m glad you did. But, I’m so tired..” I guide him to my bed, helping him under the covers.

“As long as we can cuddle..” He chuckles, resting his head on my breast, before sleep takes him. I too follow soon, all fear of nightmares plaguing me, gone.

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