democratic bump

Tag yourself: American banknote edition

George Washington
>First President
>Kinda whiny
>But also will kick your redcoat ass

Thomas Jefferson
>Really good writer
>I love my wife
>But also bang her half-sister so that’s cool

Abraham Lincoln
>Freed the slaves, yo
>I will grow beard if a little girl tells me to
>I hate the theater, Mary.

Alexander Hamilton
>I am always starting shit
>I’m smarter than Jefferson but even worse at keeping it in my pants
>My family is not very good at duels

Andrew Jackson
>Did somebody say duel?
>I will fucking end you
>Who wants a taste of the Hickory cane today?

Ulysses S. Grant
>My real name is Hiram
>Andrew Johnson can suck it
>I used to be a Democrat but bump that noise

Ben Franklin
>I really enjoy hearing myself talk
>The national bird should be a turkey, obvi
>Lightening makes me nervous