“It was a drive from Seattle at 7 pm as the sun started to go down. Racing down a highway at 75 miles per hour, sitting in the backseat of a Toyota minivan. The fields to my right seemed nearly barren, devoid of human touch. That day had been a bad day, one in which I realized that I’d let my life crumble to its knees, begging me to build it back up again. The future seemed unbeatable, unthinkable and unpredictable. The glass window reflected a delicate young girl, touched by all of her demons, held captive by her own past. But beyond that mirror was the field. The sun was sending out rays of color across once white clouds. It was a promenade for the boldest colors and the wildest rays to dance miraculously within my view. The field grew yellow, then red, then slowly went out of view. I’ll never understand it, but at that moment, nothing seemed to matter other than the sky I could see. The richest emotions filled me from the heels of my feet to the top of my head. The notion of tomorrow stood up, shook my hand, and welcomed me in with open arms.
It was the first and the last time that I wholly felt at peace with what was to come.
And it was this moment that made me realize that paradise would never be a destination or a location for me, because for me, paradise was a state of mind.”
Innocently Beautiful Moments/ (pt. 2) / excerpt from a journal entry circa 2012. |(Morsus Engel)|