deep-dan

anonymous asked:

do u ever wish you could watch one of dan and phil’s old skype calls from before they met? like i just want to know what they talked about and what they did for 5 hours

thanks to phil lester the living legend who took screenshots of their old skype calls all the time cuz they were young n gross n cute n in love n he wanted to cherish those moments forever.. we know some of their skype shenanigans included but were not limited to:

deep convos with dans childhood doggo

more deep convos with dans bear probably when dan had to get up to go do something

guitar hero for hours probably (im sure dan used to play cheesy songs that still bring back memories to this day)

dan doing some weird shit and acting out skits most likely bc he was and still is a dramatic theater kid and phil was always super entertained by them

danisabear

proof that dan has been the sun since 2009

and screenshots like this… among other.. similar screenshots….. just a few out of the many, many screenshots that will forever remain private… :)

anonymous asked:

what's so iconic about the Viscosity Exchange ??

listen here. LISTEN. hERE. it’s just so good. (for anyone who wants to watch it back it starts at like :33 of the first undertale video.) okay first of all. the second phil first says viscosity dan immediately breaks off and turns to him with the crinkliest eyes and a lil wrinkled nose and it’s already aggressively cute and we are like a quarter of a second into this exchange. incredible. beautiful. to me it was such a significant thing that he doesn’t mock phil’s word choice to US in the way that he used to on dapg ALL THE FUCKING TIME, but instead he turns to PHIL and rather than mocking him he just does that cute confused face and kind of asks phil to clarify why doing a let’s play would involve viscosity at all. 

CUTE!!!! and then there’s A JUMP CUT!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!! WHY? it HAUNTS ME TO THIS DAY! when we cut back, dan has completely dropped his on-camera voice and his body is pointed a little more inwards at phil. amazing. what happened in the lil bit that was cut out of this? we can ONLY GUESS. so then dan proceeds to ask in his much deeper/softer off-camera voice, “how can a let’s play have viscosity?” and honestly i am just left asking “how can such a dumb fucking question sound so soft and enticing wtf.”  and then phil tries to explain it in his silly way, he’s saying it’s “deep and sticky” and dan just gives a TEENY TINY SMILE and then turns to share it with us and THIS IS HOW HE IS REACTING TO PHILS WEIRD BRAIN NOW it’s no longer MOCKING it’s SOFT AND FOND and he’s smiling at us to sort of tacitly communicate how adorable he finds phil’s mind and i want dEATH and then, as if this weren’t enough, his voice drops even further and gets all hoarse as he asks phil, “do you know what viscosity is?” and just turns that same fond smile towards him 

and honestly if at this point you haven’t gone back to the video to watch this you really need to just for this part because holy shite man,,, that voice dan uses is Something and phil himself looks a lil shook and he gets all flustered and giggles 

and dan giggles while watching phil giggle and then phil says “let’s keep going!!!!!!” rly promptly and phil’s whole reaction was so unwarranted based on the actual words they are saying which makes me feel like phil is just reacting to dan’s flirty voice and basically wow this whole scene is everything to me ok you need to rewatch and appreciate it fully i still wake up in cold sweats thinkin about it

anonymous asked:

2009! Phan, Phil teaches Dan how to masterbaute for the first time

Includes religious!Dan. If you have trouble reading on mobile open in your phone browser.

Watching a horror movie at one AM isn’t one of Phil’s brightest ideas, but what else is a boy to do when there’s nothing else on TV but infomercials and confusing foreign films? He’s curled up on the couch with a blanket and some microwave popcorn, trying to convince himself that there’s nothing scary about the terrible acting and laughable CGI playing onscreen. Despite how awfully B-grade the film is, there’s just something about watching it this late while his parents are asleep that was always going to put him on edge. He checks his phone every few minutes, and, while the regularity of it is a plea for distraction, the underlying reason is impatience. He opens his text messages for the eleventh time that hour, but there’s still no reply. He knows Dan most likely just fell asleep and that’s why he hasn’t replied in almost four hours – although it would be strangely early for his nocturnal friend – but there’s still a nagging in his gut each time he checks. It probably comes from a selfish place of him just wanting to talk to Dan, but the horror movie isn’t doing much to calm his nerves. When his Motorola beeps with low battery Phil sighs, admitting defeat and tucking it between the couch cushions to break his constant loop. He settles further down into the couch, pulling the blanket tighter around his shoulders and letting himself become immersed in the plotline. It’s awful, but Phil is both invested and creeped out, so when a loud knock echoes from the front door he jumps about a mile.

‘Shit!’ he squeaks, jolting so violently his buttered popcorn goes everywhere.

His body snaps around and then freezes, staring over the back of the couch in the direction of the front door. His heart is racing but he holds his breath, listening. The rest of the house is completely silent. Who on Earth would be knocking past one AM? Phil tries to rid his mind of all the unhelpful horror situations it’s supplying him and instead thinks rationally. A neighbour, maybe? Some teenagers messing around? Phil lets go of a shaky breath, wondering if he can just ignore it – whoever it is, who are they to know he’s still up?

Phil jumps again at the second knock. He’s not past admitting that he’s scared, but he tells himself that it must be something important if they’re still there. He briefly considers waking up his parents to come check but then scowls, reminding himself he’s twenty-two, for God’s sake. He peels himself off the couch, letting the blanket and waterfall of popcorn fall to the floor, before walking with a new found confidence to the door.

He loses it the moment his hand hovers over the front light-switch. When it comes to making YouTube videos, his overreactive imagination is quite handy, but it’s not so much in this situation. He takes another deep breath, shaking the image of Jeff the Killer from his head, and then unlocks the door. He creeks it open slowly, just far enough to peek through, but when he sees the person on the other side he swings it wide open.

‘Dan?’ he says with utter disbelief, every ounce of his apprehension evaporating.

Keep reading

pastelgothiclesbian  asked:

Okay, so can you make a fic where dan is tied town and Phil has a vibrating wand on his cock and dan screaming and writhing around and he finally cums. BUT Phil does not let up and keeps the vibrator and the head of god cock until he is crying from the overstimulation.

Yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Okay so gUYS I went to the potato bowl it was fuckin lit ++ dirty anons are back on @subbydan-answers for all you sinners ++ I’m doing OCs on my writing tumblr @somanydestiel

Tags: Overstim, Bondage, Edging, dom!Phil, top!Phil, Degradation, Daddy Kink, very rough rough rough play, cumplay if you squint really hard, Aftercare


- Looking back, Dan really shouldn’t have teased Phil and then gone off to touch himself without permission, because he’s now tied tightly to his bed, Phil staring at him with that smirk and his hands behind his back. “Do you know why I’m punishing you, slut?” He asks as he crosses the room and climbs onto the bed above Dan.

- “Yes, Daddy-” Dan’s voice is cut off when Phil slaps him across the face- not hard enough to leave a mark, but enough to sting.

- “Naughty whores like you don’t get Daddies.”

- “Yessir, sorry sir,” Dan amends, eyes shut and trying not to focus on his hard on. Knowing Phil, he won’t be cumming for a while yet. Phil kisses Dan softly on the lips before moving to his neck, biting and sucking dark marks into the skin there. It makes Dan wiggle and his eyes glaze over, because his neck has always been pretty sensitive.

- Phil sits back on his haunches, admiring the mess he’s already made of Dan, and then reveals what’s behind his back- a hitachi wand. Just the sight of it makes Dan’s cock twitch because he loves it, loves how good it feels, how quickly it can make him cum. Tonight is going to be hard. “I’m going to edge you once for every hour your slutty little ass teased me today.”

-Nine. Phil is going to edge him nine times. Dan bites his lip when Phil turns on the wand, hips lifting off the bed just at the sound. He whines in the back of his throat when it does touch him, vibrating up and down his length, Phil moving it slowly with a dangerous look on his face. “Feel good?” Dan makes an affirmative humming sound, looking at Phil pleadingly. Already, he’s wrecked, needy, and close. Riling Phil up takes a toll on him too. Right as Dan’s about to come, the ask for permission on the tip of his tongue, Phil pulls the wand away, running it up and down Dan’s ribs instead, brushing it over his nipples once or twice as Dan calms down slightly. “One. Beg me to touch you again, bitch.”

- “Sir, please, please touch me. Please punish me an’ make me yours sir. ‘M sorry I was bad, just please touch me.” For a long moment, Phil keeps mindlessly moving the wand, dragging it over Dan’s inner thighs. Then, out of nowhere, it’s pressed against Dan’s taint and balls, just enough pressure that Dan squirms. Slowly, ever so slowly, he moves it up to the sensitive head of Dan’s cock, holding it there.

- “You’ve had worse,” Phil says with mild disinterest when Dan whimpers. “Be lucky I’m even bothering to touch a disgusting slut like you.” This time, Dan very nearly comes, but it’s taken away from him as the first spurt starts to dribble out of his cock. While Dan ‘cools down,’ if you can even call it that, Phil collects the cum with his fingers and presses them to Dan’s lips to clean. “Don’t get my toy dirty,” he chastises. Just like that, it’s back, and Dan nearly sobs with desperation. The amount of time is even shorter this time, and continues on in much the same pattern until Dan’s been edged eight times.

- Setting down the wand, Phil crawls on top of Dan and balances with his jean-covered thigh pressed between Dan’s legs, one hand balancing himself to the left of Dan’s head, and his right around Dan’s throat, pressing down so that Dan’s breathing gets shallow and his cheeks turn a darker shade of pink. “Rut against my thigh like the pathetic piece of shit you are,” he growls. That’s all Dan needed, and his hips rapidly drive his little cock forward for the painful friction and it feels so fucking good to be beneath Phil like this, surrounded by his scent, tears in the corners of his eyes. Precum smears onto the denim and Dan is about to come, a moan caught in his throat when Phil jumps off of him. No more weight against Dan’s body, no more hand on his throat, no more leg for him to get off on.

- “Sir, I’m sorry I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please let me cum, please! Please, sir, I’ll do anything, please! I’m sorry I won’t be bad ever again I’ll do anything sir please!”

- Instead of answering, he picks back up the vibrator and presses it to the head of Dan’s cock again. “You can cum,” Phil says casually, but what makes Dan hit his high is the way Phil reaches into his pants to start stroking himself, eyes never leaving Dan’s shaking form. But once Dan cums, Phil doesn’t move the vibrator, despite Dan’s protests and attempts to shift his hips away from it. “What’s the matter, sweetheart?” Phil mocks. “Thought the fucking whore wanted to cum.”

- “I did, I did, thank you so much Master but ‘s too much, stop, too much, no more,” Dan pleads, barely intelligible.

- Phil, the little shit, purposely misinterprets. “What’s that? You want me to make you cum over and over and then fuck you? Beg me.” No, that’s not what Dan wants, but he’s so far into subspace that he immediately starts begging, even though Phil’s already made up his mind. “You have permission to cum as much as you like.” He undresses then reaches for the lube, coats his fingers, and pushes two in at once. Dan’s used to it, and Phil knows how much Dan loves the burn of the sudden stretch. He seeks out Dan’s prostate quickly, and attacks it with his fingers, managing to get Dan to cum three more times (The last two dry) before he’s ready to fuck him, the wand still mercilessly against the head of Dan’s cock. He moves it when he pushes into Dan, and instead uses the hand to choke Dan again.

-”Sir, sir, Daddy, no, please, Daddy, Daddy, Phil too much, no!” Dan all but screams, sobbing, but Phil doesn’t- if Dan really wanted him to stop, he’d safeword. The fifth time Dan cums, he passes out. Phil. Doesn’t. Stop. He keeps fucking, and as he gets close, he takes Dan’s soft cock in his hand and jerks him off in time with it until Dan hits one last high, without even getting hard, moaning in his sleep and arching his back. Phil pulls out and looks at Dan, almost amazed. The boy’s neck is lined with hickeys and fingerprints, his cock and hole red and abused, come dripping out of him and drying on his chest. 

-While Dan’s still out, Phil starts a bath, brings in the wand and some water, and gently wipes the cum off of Dan with a damp warm washcloth. “Dan, sweetheart,” he whispers, shaking Dan’s shoulder. “Wake up, baby. Let Daddy take care of you.” Dan’s eyes blink open, unfocused, and his swollen lips are slightly parted. “Deep breath for me, Dan. Look at me.” It takes a minute, but Dan eventually does. “There you are. You did such a good job for me, baby. My beautiful little boy, doing so well for his Daddy.”

- “’M not pathetic?” Dan asks blearily.

- “Of course not, I love you so much, Dan. Can I pick you up and carry you to the bath?” Dan nods and winds his arms around Phil’s neck, allowing himself to be bridal carried to the bathroom. “What bath bomb, baby?” Dan looks over the basket of them and points to a dark midnight one with gold sparkles in it, marketed as being a lavender scent. Of course he picks the darkest one in there- even as out of it as he is, Dan has standards. Phil sets Dan on the toilet seat and drops in the bomb, waiting for it to fizzle all the way before lifting Dan up again and setting him in the hot water. While Dan relaxes, Phil wipes down the wand, brushes his teeth, and puts on his glasses in lieu of his contacts, occasionally glancing at Dan in the mirror to make sure he’s alright.

- As soon as he’s done, Phil whispers “lean forward” and climbs into the bath behind Dan, so that the younger is between his legs and leaning back against his chest. “Open your mouth.” Dan does, and Phil uncaps the water bottle to hold it to Dan’s lips, slowly getting him to drink the whole bottle. When it’s done and the bath is getting cold, Phil unplugs the drain and gets the warm water running again while he washes Dan’s hair. As he moves on to wash Dan’s body, he accidentally brushes Dan’s sensitive cock, earning the softest mewl of protest Phil’s ever heard, which makes his heart absolutely melt. “Don’t worry, we’re all done. After the bath, let’s go to bed, beautiful.”

- He carefully dries Dan off with a fluffy towel, and carries him back to Phil’s room. Dan’s room is where they scene, and then they sleep in Phil’s clean bed. “I know, I’ll be right back,” Phil says as he puts Dan down, since the boy made a soft sound of dissent. He pulls on a pair of boxers and grabs some clothes for Dan. “Arms up.” The green uni hoodie comes over Dan’s head. “Up for me real quick, baby.” Dan stands up long enough for a pair of boxers and soft pajama pants to be pulled onto him. “There you go. I love you so much, Dan. You did such a good job for me and I’m so proud of you,” Phil assures, kneeling and putting one hand on Dan’s face, thumb smoothing over his cheekbone. “My good little boy.”

- Dan throws his arms around Phil’s neck and cries, while Phil just holds him until it’s out of his system. “My good boy, Dan. You’re so amazing, I love you, you’re my perfect baby.” At that point, Dan pulls away and lets Phil kiss his forehead, then lies back on the bed with a slight shiver. Phil pulls the duvet back and gets both of them under it, then throws an arm over Dan’s waist, holding him close while they fall asleep.


This is 1.7k and thus a fic

-Matt

Send us your sins

Hold It

A/N: So good, it hurts.


“You really piss me off sometimes,” Dan grumbled. He currently had a grip on my wrist and was leading me upstairs into the flat. I rolled my eyes, he was so dramatic when he wanted to be.

We’d been having a perfectly fine evening, until I’d decided to annoy him. Usually he would either ignore me or bother me just as I did him, but there were also times like these. He’d suddenly steam up and would be in an irritated mood for the rest of the night. It had long since stopped intimidating me, and now I knew he just needed space when he was in these moods.

As he locked the door I went to head toward the living room to do just that, leave him alone. Dan’s grip on my wrist didn’t let go, though. He still had his jacket on, just standing in front of the door with a hand on me. I shook him, starting to get annoyed myself. “Hey, hulk man? Yeah I’m gonna need that arm back now.” Dan yanked me as I started walking. His eyes were literally on fire while he looked down at me. “Alright well, you got me. Now what? You gonna throw me outside for the night?”

My body was pressed against his chest now. His face got closer to mine, until our noses were touching. “You,” he growled, “are going to go to our room, strip naked, and wait for me to come in there. Do I make myself clear?” Usually I hated being told what to do, but Dan rarely called the shots in bed, it excited me. I only nodded and let him release me so I could fast-walk to the bedroom. When I entered, I peeled my clothes from my body. They fell and joined the piles of clothing on the floor. There was anticipation running through my veins, Dan and I had had a few fights that ended in hot sex, but it only happened when were were both upset. If one of us was mad we’d usually keep our distance. Dan’s steps got closer and closer while my body climbed up the bed and then sat in the middle. Dan entered the room, his shirt was off and in his hand but he dropped it to the floor as he came toward me.

“Come down here.” I cautiously headed toward where he stood at the foot of the bed, getting up on my knees and looking up at him expectantly. “Now what, big man?” He bit his lip and remained silent, long enough for me to get uncomfortable under his gaze. “Since you love to push me right to the edge…” Dan pushed my shoulder and I fell back. He dropped down to the floor and his hands were placed on my knees. “So let’s see how you like it.” I swallowed hard. His voice was deep and soft.

Slowly, Dan pushed my knees apart and I was on display to him. I wanted to close my legs out of shyness, but wanted to see where he was going with this. Without preamble, he started leaving wet kisses along the inside of my thighs. His hands slid slowly on along the tops of my thighs as well, sending tingles down my legs and right between them too. He knew they were sensitive, my body was getting hotter. Moments later, his left hand was skirting dangerously close to my center. By then I was more than ready for him to do more to me, sighing every few seconds. His finger teased me, tracing over every bit of me without hitting my clit, just gathering wetness and spreading it around. “C’mon, Dan. Do something,” I whined. “Alright, baby. As you wish.” The evil finger that had been teasing slid slowly into me. It wasn’t enough, but I still gave a gratified sound. He pumped it in and out of me while still littering kisses around where I wanted him most. Soon another finger was added, and he picked up speed. In a few minutes I was close, moaning loud and begging him not to stop. Dan stopped kissing me and looked up.

“You wanna cum?”

I nodded so hard my neck cracked a little, “Please don’t stop I’m so close!”

“Well too bad.” Dan ripped away all contact he had with me. Instantly I was falling away from that ecstatic moment he’d been driving me toward. I tried to chase it but without any stimulation I knew it was gone. I propped up on my elbows and looked at him in anger. “What? Didn’t like that? Didn’t like feeling good and then having it all stop?” I pouted and pushed my hips toward him, hoping he’d actually go back and finish me. Surprisingly he started up again.

Three almost-there moments later and I could feel tears in my eyes. “Dan…I’m begging you just-” I tried to catch my breath and speak at the same time. Plump pink lips pulled away from my overheated, soaking center. “You think I should let you cum now?” I didn’t even bother answering, just whining out softly. “Hey, don’t give up. Maybe I will this time.” Dan waited until he was sure I had calmed down enough, then proceeded to work me over again, faster this time, until I was right there, just about to let go. “On second thought…” I cried out. My fingers were gripping the sheets impossibly hard. “I’m still pretty mad at you.” I wiped the tears from my eyes and sat up halfway. “Bear, I’m sorry I made you so upset tonight. I promise I won’t bother you anymore just please please let me cum baby I’m going to explode!”

While sex between us could get a little on the kinkier side, nothing one of us did had ever pushed the other to beg; not until now. Dan seemed genuinely shocked at my words. “Did I push you too far, princess?” He uttered in a soft voice. “No no no I’m good. Just can you…you know.” I gestured to my nether regions. For the first time during the hour he’d been torturing me, he gave a genuine smile instead of a smirk. This time when he leaned in, I knew he would finish me properly. His tongue and lips went back to my clit, his fingers playing with that soft spot inside me. In less than a minute I had a grip on his hair and I was all but screaming his name with a mix of “Daddy” and “thank you”. Dan rode me through it, until I was too sensitive and he had to stop.

My vision blurred with tears and I tried to catch my breath. Distantly I heard Dan remove his pants and climb behind me on the bed. Carefully, he pulled me up where he was, and held me to his chest, idly wiping at the last of the frustrated tears on my face. “I really am sorry if I made you mad,” I said. Dan stopped and turned my head to look at him. “It’s fine, pumpkin. Sorry I pushed you so much tonight.”

“Don’t worry. I actually kind of liked it. Maybe I should piss you off more in the future.”

His face got serious, “Do it again and next time you just won’t cum.”

Maybe it was because he’d just made me cum, but I didn’t really believe him.


A/N: still no computer, dears! Sorry but this format will have to do

wild world condensed
  • good grief: death and how confusing it is
  • the currents: donald trump sucks and so does the media
  • an act of kindness: regret and self loathing
  • warmth: how to recover from 2016
  • glory: oHMYGOD WHAT IS ThIs bLESSInG
  • power: an abusive relationship??? the media is shit????? who knows not me but i hope no one hurt dan
  • two evils: again, more self loathing but slightly more optimistic self loathing
  • send them off!: religion, demons and jealously?? insecurity??
  • lethargy: anxiety (particularly about dying)
  • four walls: the song about a convicted murderer
  • blame: two gangsters fighting??? thanks dan for this deep meaningful song
  • fake it: idk man i suppose it's about how shit the media is?? (again)
  • snakes: more anxiety, this time about life in 2016 in general
  • winter of our youth: MORE self loathing and nostalgia and anxiety
  • way beyond: the media, if u didn't already know, is SHIT
  • oil on water: sex, but empowering sex. u go girl, u have all the sex
  • campus: don't stay in school kids y'all are wasting your time it's a trap
  • shame: bad blood 2.0, otherwise known as, "u were my best friend and then u changed and ur horrible now" (also, hidden self loathing)
  • the anchor: so yeah conclusion i hate myself but ily
Connected

Connected | It’s 2009. Dan and Phil are in a long distance relationship, and while they’ve had more sex than they count on one hand, they’ve never properly done it. Dan’s tired of waiting, but Phil’s not so ready to let them go all the way, so he gives Dan the next best thing. | Phan | Mature | Intercrural, Smut, PWP | 3.5K Words

Disclaimer: In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.

My anons asked for thigh fucking, and they got thigh fucking.

(ao3)

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“This is my boyfriend Dan, by the way” || Dan Howell

A/N: This was a really nice request I got, thanks for that. Also the title is a little bit different. Have a nice weekend! 

Word Count: 1.5K

POV: Reader

MASTERLIST

Originally posted by shinyphan

It all started on a Saturday morning. I was sitting on the breakfast table by myself. I munched on some toast and checked my emails, like I do it every morning. A cup of hot black coffee was cooling off next to my laptop that was in front of me.

All of the new messages were mostly spam and some business stuff but one email in particular caught my eye. As soon as I saw the title I instantly clicked on it:

“High School Reunion”

Suddenly I was filled with excitement and resentment at the same time.

As my eyes scanned the invite over and over again I heard Dan enter the kitchen. He was wearing his pyjama that consisted of boxers and a loose t-shirt and his hair was a curly mess that still managed to look good.

We had been best friends for years now and shared a flat together in London. Dan noticed my startled expression and immediately asked what the matter was with me.  

My eyes were still glued to the words ‘Partners are welcome as well’ as I answered him.  That sentence alone made me want to not go.

“I was just sent an invite to a high school reunion.” I explained while taking a sip from my coffee.

The dark liquid was still hot and nicely warmed my throat.

Dan yawned and poured some of his favourite cereal into a bowl.

“Why do you look like you were invited to a funeral then?” he asked me confused, as he added the milk and sat down on the table next to me.

“It’s says we should bring our partners and I don’t want to show up alone.” I sighed, the taste of coffee was still lingering on my tongue. It was as bittersweet as I felt right now.

Dan put his spoon, that he was eating his cereal with, down to eye me intensively.

“Why don’t you want to go there on your own?” he asked me, cocking one eyebrow.

I felt myself getting a little bit nervous and abashed. I played with my hands and sighed.  

“I always got teased because I didn’t date a single guy during high school. I kinda promised myself that by the time the first reunion comes around I would have a boyfriend.” I admitted embarrassed and tried to hide my flushed face behind my hair.

There suddenly was a hint of a smile on his lips but it only lasted a few milliseconds.

“Forget it, it’s stupid.” I quickly told him, shaking my head eagerly. I half-heartedly laughed about myself as I hid my face in my hands.

“It’s definitely not stupid, Y/N. If it means so much to you then I could go with you, Y/N” Dan whispered as he gave me a short but warm hug.

“Really?” I asked him in surprise. Was he really suggesting that?

“I’d do quite a lot to make you happy, even pretend to be your boyfriend.” He smiled down at me as I whispered a sincere ‘thank you’ against his broad chest.

We were that kind of best friends that everybody mistook for a couple anyway. We were pretty affectionate towards each other, in a platonic way of course. Making it look like we were in a relationship was therefore not a very challenging task.

I was still nervous though when I got dressed the following Friday. I wanted to make an impression. I wanted people to look at me and think ‘wow, she really made it.’ I wanted to prove all of those people who never saw my potential in high school wrong.  

“It’s just your friends from high school, Y/N.” Dan tried to calm me down as he walked in with his car keys in his hands.

I obviously didn’t grow up in central London, where our flat was, but in a small town about an hour away.

“I had like 4 close friends in high school, Dan.” I reminded him laughing.

I never tried to be popular or fit in, I found 4 wonderful friends and that was totally enough for me. My high school times were therefore quite drama free except for the fact that I was occasionally made fun of and told that I would stay single forever, of course.

We left our shared flat and drove to the place where we were going to meet up.

As soon as we got out of the car again, Dan automatically took my hand as if it was a totally normal thing to do. I looked up at him in surprise and stared at him with wide eyes until I caught on to what was happening.

We were here together, Dan was the ‘partner’ I brought along with me.

“Ohh” I mouthed, feeling a little blush make its way onto my cheeks. I hadn’t really thought about that.

I shot Dan a nervous look before we walked into the restaurant together where most of my old classmates were already waiting for everybody to arrive.

He reassuringly intertwined our fingers, making me smile.

I saw a lot of familiar faces, some hadn’t changed at all, some changed a lot. I didn’t stay in touch with anybody from high school, so I hadn’t seen anyone in almost 10 years.

“Hey Everyone!” I greeted all of them cheerfully.

Their heads turned and they eagerly eyed Dan and I up and down.

“Y/N Y/L/N is that you?” Kimberly, who had always been the straight A student, asked.

“Yeah, it’s me. C’mon I haven’t changed that much, have I? This is my boyfriend Dan, by the way.”

The last sentence felt weird and at the same time so… natural? Dan’s face beamed as the word ‘boyfriend’ left my mouth and I couldn’t hold back a sweet smile either. He said his greetings as well before we sat down at the huge table.

After everyone had arrived we ordered some drinks and started chatting. Everybody was asked to talk about what they have been up to since we all finished high school.

Then it was suddenly my turn.  

“Well… I work as a lawyer for Youtube and me and Dan live in London now.” I told everybody.

Most people seemed impressed by the words Youtube, London and lawyer. Our home town was quite small and boring. London on the other hand being a beautiful big city sounded exciting.

“You studied law?” Somebody asked and I nodded.

“Yes, at Manchester University, that’s where I met Dan.” I smiled up at my tall ‘boyfriend’.

“So, are you a lawyer as well, Daniel?” Stacy, one of our former cheerleaders asked.

Dan was definitely getting some attention from the female part of our group. I protectively placed my hand on his thigh to show everyone that he was with me… which he actually wasn’t.

In reaction, he showed me his famous half smirk, as if he were saying ‘jealous much?’. I rolled my eyes at him but we both knew that he was right deep down.

“I’m not.” Dan laughed at the thought. “I finished like one semester before I dropped out. I’m a Youtuber now. That’s how me and Y/N met again.”

I could tell that Dan was feeling awkward once again because he didn’t know if people understood his profession.

Luckily though most people did and were now really interested in what Dan was doing.

He was asked all sorts of questions, and most of the conversations were focused on the two of us now since everybody treated Dan like he was a super famous celebrity and those were extremely rare in my old hometown.

I was very proud of Dan while he explained his job and passion. He then talked about me and how we met and that honestly made my heart melt. Could this really be? Who knew that I had feelings like that for my best friend? Everybody but us two probably.

“Who would have thought that you Y/N, out of all people, would hit the jackpot.” Stacy uttered completely stunned and barely able to keep her eyes off Dan.

“Nah, I feel like I was the one who hit the jackpot.” he softly said, while looking at me with loving eyes. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks as some people around us ‘awwed’.

“Dan, stop it.” I whined smiling and gently hit his chest before I leaned my head against his broad shoulder. We were behaving like two lovey dovey teenagers, which we, let’s be real, probably really were.  

“You two are perfect for each other.” Kimberly swooned like some of Dan’s fans on tumblr.

Dan and I’s gazes met as we both blushed.

“We are.” Dan whispered into my ear, making my heart skip a beat.

pastelxpunk (3) Masterlist

Links Last Checked: October 8th, 2017

part one, part two

Clumsy Howell and Bad Boy Phil - cutesy-phan-fiction

Summary: Tough Punk Phil and Clumsy Pastel Goth Dan.

Comets Falling (ao3) - howelllesters

Summary: This catches up with the Dan and Phil of the Modern Fairytale universe roughly a year later, and shows a very key moment in their relationship through little snapshots.

Die Young - phansbumsex

Summary: Pastel!Dan came to the bar with his husband to unwind, but ditches him for the punk hottie across the bar with the tattoos and piercings.

Disgusting - lesterkinky

Summary: punk!dan is disgustingly in love with pastel!phil but phil isnt really convinced.

Don’t - gorgeousdan

Summary: Pastel!Dan spends the weekend at his hot older boyfriend, punk!Phil’s, house and gets rimmed for the first time.

Falling For You - jentin

Summary: pastel!dan/punk!phil.

Flower Boy - jilliancares

Summary: Pastel!Dan is sitting in a park alone after getting broken up with picking the petals off flowers. He doesn’t realize there’s a protest being led by Phil to help protect plants and trees from being torn down and such so without realizing Dan was crying Phil yells at Dan for killing those flowers.

Gay Fairies (ao3) - moonythejedi394

Summary: Everyone knew of Phil Lester’s deep hatred for Dan Howell. Everyone knew that Dan Howell was the gayest gay man to ever gay. Everyone assumed that Phil hated Dan because Dan would not stop hitting on Phil, and everyone agreed that even they would be irritated by that much flirting, however everyone did not know or even guess that Phil Lester really hated Dan Howell so much because Phil actually wanted to make out with him.

Just a Little Tummy Ache - elliesfics

Summary: Phil meets Dan in probably the most unconventional way. And despite being polar opposites, maybe they’re more alike than they ever thought. The biggest difference? Dan can’t tell a tummy ache apart from a different kind of ‘ache’. Perhaps too innocent for his own good, until he meets Phil that is.

Looks Can Be Deceiving (ao3) - Bbkkgg30

Summary: The new kid that scares everyone because of his looks teaches Dan that you really shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.

Nerves - kitters

Summary: Pastel!Dan is working in a Lush retail shop in London when approached by Punk!Phil, who is looking for some eyeliner.

Never Underestimate the New Kid - sexyassphan

Summary: Dan is super small and pastel and Phil is huge and punk and someone insults Dan and Phil stands up, which everyone takes as a sign that Phil is going to kick the person’s butt except his just takes Dan’s flower crown and Dan beats them up.

Painting Phil - gracefulphangirl

Summary: Punk!Phil goes to pastel!Dan’s house so that he can return Dan’s flower crown and get his bandana back, and he ends up staying for a little longer than planned.

Picking Daisies, Picking People - elliesfics

Summary: Dan has an obsessions with flowers. Phil can’t understand it. And so, Dan plans to explain in only the best way possible.

Punish Me - your-precious-phan-blog

Summary: Rich!Businessman!Punk!Phil being Pastel!Litte! Dan’s daddy.

This Is What It Felt Like - melancholymango

Summary: After their hasty hook-up in a bathroom stall at a bar, Dan and Phil are on their way back to Phil’s apartment to see through what they started. (AKA punk!phil taking pastel!dan’s virginity)

We’re Okay, Bear - thetickleeraven

Summary: Dan’s crying after an encounter with a bully and Phil’s there to defend him and cheer him up.

Work In Progress - oakleysfthoying

Summary: pastel!Dan is dating punk!Phil and finally comes out to his parents, but they aren’t exactly supportive, but Phil is there to comfort Dan.

aftg characters as bo burnham lyrics
  • neil: [crying] eat a dick, bitch! eat a fucking dick, bitch!
  • riko: you're fucked! (totally fucked!)
  • andrew: i saw an old man slip and fall; what a fucking idiot
  • aaron: give me a chance to show you what it's like, to be a straight white male
  • kevin: well according to my calculations, i'm sorry just let me run this again, you're a giant pussy
  • nicky: if i'm gay, hey god, strike me dead [sudden coughing and choking fit]
  • matt: i'm really fucking deep bro, so deep that it's called...."hashtag deep"
  • dan: do you fucking think i want a messy burrito? nobody wants a messy burrito
  • renee: i like soda, where's the soda? am i the only fucking person here that likes soda?
  • allison: you might think the perfect girl only exists in your mind but she's real, but she died last week
  • wymack: i want to have a daughter so that there will finally be someone around who can fit their hand into a pringles can