deep ridged

Kitchen Sink.

TW: major character death, graphic depictions of suicide
Also, this is probably my longest one shot yet coming in at 1,800+ words. So, woo for that? Enjoy?
——

If they had only known.
Oh god, if they had only known.

Shiro glanced around the training arena, doing a mental head count and coming up short. They were one paladin short.

Hunk was here, standing a little ways away with Pidge, who was helping him with something regarding his armor.

Two down, and he was here.
That was three.

Keith stood brooding, his leadership position something that left him in a sour mood. Shiro was back, he should lead.

That was four Paladins out of five.
One color of the Voltron rainbow was missing. A very blue color.

Not yet wanting to cause lots of stress, Shiro walked over to Keith with a hint of worry in his tone. “Have you seen Lance this morning?”

It must have been on the new black Paladins mind as well, because Keith flinched at Shiro’s question.

The blue paladin had been last present the night before, but he had been acting very strange. A huge contrast to the typical quiet they had been getting for a few weeks.

Lance had been insisting on Hunk making the greatest Earth-like dinner just for once, so they could feast that night.

They did, it was delicious.
Garlic knots came to the party.

Lance was loud and he was joking; he was a hoard of smiles and laughter. It had made everyone suspicious at this sudden mood change but they were so happy to finally see life in Lance that they blew it off.

Except Keith. Except the leader.

He watched his teammate carefully that night, and saw that behind that laughter there was something forced. Behind the smile, there were cracked teeth.

Behind those bright eyes, something looked like it was dead, dull, and gone.

Keith didn’t say anything.

He didn’t say anything when Lance took Allura into the blue lion and for some reason decided to tell her all about how to fly her.

Lance showed her the best techniques, told some of the things Blue did and didn’t prefer, and even gave her some personal tips.

He just wanted to show his lion off, would have been his excuse if anyone asked. But no one asked.

If anyone had asked…
Oh god if they had only known.

Keith shifted in his spot, uncrossing his arms and looked to Shiro. “No, not since last night. He wasn’t at breakfast.”

A cold feeling crept through Shiro, but he nodded and patted Keith’s shoulder. “I’m going to ask the others. Maybe Lance is sick.”

Keith nodded once, before his eyes drifted to land on the door he had been staring at for hours. He waited for his friend to walk through.

“Hunk! Pidge!” Shiro called, jogging over to the green and yellow paladin with a small smile.

“Shiro!” Hunk saluted and turned to face their ex-leader, smiling. Pidge rose a curious eyebrow.

“Have either of you two seen Lance this morning? We are doing something new today and we don’t want to start without him.” Shiro went straight to the point before the worry settled too hard in his gut.

“Lance? No…” Pidge replied, looking up at the black paladin and then around as if she were looking for the missing associate, and only just noticing he wasn’t there.

“I saw Lance on my way to the bathroom sometime early this morning. He looked like he just came from the hangar.”

Hunk started, innocence in his tone, “I asked him what he was doing and he nearly jumped out of his skin. But he smiled and said he had thought Blue sent him a distress wave, but it was a false alarm.”

Shiro and Pidge shared a look, and Pidge was the one to ask. “What time was that?”

Hunk thought momentarily. How long ago had that been? Was Lance back in the hangar now?

“Ugh, I’d probably say…like a few hours ago? It felt like three in the morning.” Hunk shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck.

An odd silence passed through them and no one was sure what to do. Go look for him? He was probably still in bed, or something like that.

Allura’s voice came over the com suddenly, “Paladins, we must start training. Where is Lance? He is not answering coms and he didn’t respond to the alarm system.”

Keith looked up quickly at that, “He wasn’t answering his coms?” His purple-ish eyes went across the room to the others, and apprehension set in.

“We should go look for him.” Pidge concluded, already starting for the door with Hunk at her heels.

“Yeah, Pidge and I will check the hallways, and the hangar.” Hunk informed, the duo off quickly.

“I’ll check his bedroom. Shiro, can you check the kitchen?” Keith asked, but it was more of an order.

“Of course.” And the search was on.

Keith left after Shiro, and made his way for Lances room. It was oddly quiet, no sounds of music or Lance singing or even a shower running. It made him uneasy.

He approached the door, and knocked once. “Lance?” No answer.

The former red paladin was not going to wait around for Lance to respond any longer, so he let the door open for him and he stepped into the dark room.

No signs of anyone being in here could be found, and Keiths brows furrowed. That was odd. Did Lance stay with the blue lion last night?

If so, Pidge and Hunk would be sure to find him, right? Standing in this room, something felt wrong to Keith.

Lance had been acting pretty strangely for the past few weeks. He had gotten quieter, and ha stopped voluntarily includin himself in the others events.

Keith was the only one who noticed.
He watched each time Lance tried to become part of the group, yet dos nothing as each time his voice was silenced.

It got to the point where Lance would just sulk off to his bedroom until dinner, or even breakfast the morning after.

Keith never did anything.
Lance shouldn’t be so weak, he should force himself into the circle and not wait to be allowed in, right?

Keith realized now he should have said something. Had Lance run away? Was he just hiding so someone would finally notice him?

As if on cue, a chorus of shouts erupted in Keiths skull and he was drawn from his reverie.

“—notes in our lions!”

“What? What was that, Hunk?” Keith asked, bolting from Lances room and making his way to the Hangar.

“Lance left these notes in our lions! We didn’t read them all but I think he’s in trouble.” Hunk said, voice nervous.

“He said something about leaving a place he didn’t belong. I’m not sure but I thin—”

Suddenly a harsh gasp wen through all Paladins heads, and a faint ‘No…’ entered their hearing.

“Shiro?”

“No, L-Lance…” Shiros voice cracked.

And then they were all running. Meeting in the halls they all made a break for the kitchen and their armor boots pounded on the floor of the castle.

When they finally made it to their destination… they couldn’t believe what they were seeing.

Shiro was frozen in an open doorway, staring in at a figure slumped forward near the sink.

Lance.

And his jacket was tied around his neck and his skin was pale. His head was bowed forward, slightly tilted. He looked small and sad, as if he were sure ending to the fate that was strapped around his neck.

The jacket around his neck was tied tightly around the faucet of the sink, one sleeve tied in a half assed noose that was ill practiced.

“Lance!!!” Pidge screamed, and ran forward only to be yanked back by Shiro who held onto her an went to the ground.

Keith replaced Shiro, and stood frozen in he doorway. This…

Hunk was the one who approached Lance. He came forward very slowly and tilted his friends chin up, to look at him.

There were tear stains on his cheeks.

His tongue was swollen, and his chin wet, lips red rimmed along with his eyes. His cheeks were swollen just a little, the skin at his throat trapped and irritated by the jacket.

Hunk slowly cut it from his friends neck, and no one in that room would forget the way Lance just fell.

To his side, with deep ridges in his neck from the killing device. Hunk felt for a pulse but didn’t need to when his fingers touched Lances neck and he was freezing.

It had only been at most seven hours since Hunk saw his friend, alive and walking. This must have happened only moments after their meet.

A sob came from behind them and when Keith broke out of his daze to look, Pidge was holding slips of folded paper.

She read from one of them, and by then very one was in tears and no one had any idea what to do with Lance. They couldn’t look at him, couldn’t see him like that.

To see someone once so full of life snuffed out by his own choosing, quieter after acing a voice so loud.

It wasn’t fair.

How someone who was loved by others couldn’t love himself and now he was gone and nobody had the chance to say anything, to do anything.

Now, their friend was hanging by his own jacket on the kitchen sink. He had been so desperate to leave the horrid place they had made for him, so he went like…that.

Someone who used to bring so much light to a place in the darkest times, was now left in the darkness to his own demise an nobody was there to stop him.

He was that helpless, that desperate.
So lonely and so sad, to blow out the candle that everyone had been seeing by.

Oh god if they ha only known.

‘If you’re reading this, Keith, you probably know what happened. You’re probably dancing get my dead body right now anyway, ripping this up into confetti. So I’ll keep this short.

I wasn’t happy here. I didn’t feel I belonged with you guys anymore, as you cast me out and made it known I wasn’t wanted around. I wasn’t needed around.

Even Blue didn’t want me around anymore and I think that hurt the most. It really did.

I wish I could have been on better terms with you, but I understand why you hate me. I hated me too.

So I left. Sorry I had to do it in the kitchen like that but there’s not much of anywhere to hang from in this castle so I used the sink. I hope I didn’t break anything.

Isn’t that how that guy killed himself in that movie you liked? You told me it was actually a pretty popular way to go.

You know me, always trying to be one with the crowd. And Keith?

You were a great leader.
I really mean it.

P.S. Make sure Pidge sleeps. And Hunk eats, and that Shiro gets out of his room sometimes. Help Coran out around the castle. And flirt with Allura for me.’

Oh god if they had only known.

Adam Driver’s Face

This is my attempt to explain the beauty of Adam Driver’s face: CONTRAST.

Anyone familiar with art principles knows that contrast draws attention and is visually pleasing. It is a tool artists use to direct a viewer’s gaze.

Adam Driver’s face has layers of contrast:

Light/dark: Pale skin contrasts dark hair

(also, light and dark sides of the force for Kylo Ren)

Hard/soft: prominent brow ridge, aquiline nose, pointed chin, and broad shoulders contrast with the flowing curves of his hair, his soft jawline, his rounded ears, and his large, round eyes

Masculine/feminine: masculine features of brow ridge and deep set eyes, adam’s apple (deep voice), large nose, broad shoulders, and facial hair (usually) contrast with feminine features like long eyelashes and large round eyes, paler skin, long wavy hair, fuller soft lips, and a softer jawline

Typical beauty/ugly: Large ears, large nose, long face, contrast with full lips, large eyes, broad shoulders, and luscious hair

The contrast in Adam Driver’s face (and even his personality and most of his characters) is what makes him so appealing. He is strong yet vulnerable. He is intense yet kind. He is awkward yet elegant. He is relatable yet mysterious. He is languid yet bursting with energy. He is intimidating yet endearing. He defies categorization and definition. This is what draws attention to Adam Driver. This is why he has such presence. This is why people can’t stop looking at him.

I also would like to draw special attention to some certain features of interest.

EYES: Huge and watery and deep and dark round surrounded by luscious dark lashes. Both size and roundness draw attention and create interest.

EARS: Their roundness flows perfectly into the waves of his hair.

LIPS: Pink and full and beautiful.

BEAUTY MARKS: Both endearing and beautiful. They add additional contrast to his pale skin and adds variety and interest to the symmetry of his face.

FACE LENGTH: A long face adds an additional height illusion to his already impressive height. Both his long face and height give him a thinness that contrasts with the bulky muscles of his perfectly toned body.

And now, there is just one last reason Adam Driver’s face is so beautiful: he has a unicorn soul, a heart of gold, and a reflective mind of bottomless depth. Like, he is just a really great person and you can see it in his eyes, okay?

How much better is my new sun screen than my old one? Well I used my new one (Neutrogena spf70) on all the places that usually get sun (face, arms, portions of my legs) and there was no change. I used my old one (equate spf50 aka welcome to red lobster) everywhere else and I am burned 🔥🔥🔥 even the tops of my feet and a strip of thigh under my ass.

WHERE DO MAMMALS COME FROM?

The Earth plays host to a remarkable variety of creatures all of which diverged from a single, unknown common ancestor. In the 540 million year history of complex life there have been repeated turnovers in dominant life forms, from The Age of Fishes during the Devonian to The Age of Reptiles during the Mesozoic which gave way to our current era in time, the Cenozoic, or otherwise known as The Age of Mammals. But where do mammals come from…?

Pelycosaurs…
The Pelycosaurs first appeared 306Ma and are the most basal synapsids. Synapsids are mammal-like reptiles; a distinguishable feature is their skull with only one post orbital fenestra, reptiles have two. The mammal-like reptiles show the earliest signs of evolution towards more mammal characteristics, Dimetrodon is a classic example. Dimetrodon had only a single temporal fenestra, this feature allowed for jaw muscle attachment to be further back providing a stronger bite force over a wider range of jaw movements, subsequently making Dimetrodon one of the most successful predators of its age.
Dimetrodon quite literally means “two sets of teeth” and this refers to its elongated incisors, this is the beginnings of the mammal feature known as heterodonty (differentiated teeth). Dimetrodon also exhibits deep ridges of the inner nasal cavity providing a larger surface area for the attachment of olfactory epithelium indicating a larger reliance of the sense of smell (something that will become more important in future mammal evolution).

Therapsids…
Therapsids appear around 275Ma and likely evolved from pelycosaurs or a similar sort of ancestor. They are still classed as synapsids but they even more mammal-like features than their ancestors. Therapsids have less of a sprawling gait than the pelycosaurs and other reptiles (although the herbivorous kind still retain a rather sprawling gait, this is a feature that is slow to disappear). Therapsids have an even larger temporal fenestra and more elongated incisors as the teeth continue to differentiate. The skull of therapsids is also beginning to change; mammals have a single jaw bone called the dentary, this is present in synapsids along with many other jaw bones such as the quadrate and articular, but as mammal evolution gets underway the dentary expands and the quadrate and articular reduce in size and become part of the middle ear bones. Some Therapsids were apex predators throughout the permian such as Gorgonops.

Cynodonts…
Cynodont fossils are some of the most important fossils in the mammals evolutionary record and we are classed as part of Cynodontia. They are dog-like creatures and appear around 260Ma, they were hugely successful and diversified rapidly. One of the best examples of cynodonts in mammal evolution is Thrinaxodon. The cynodonts exhibit even greater tooth differentiation and tooth occlusion (precise tooth contact of the upper and lower teeth, a feature unique to mammals). Tooth occlusion also suggests the cynodonts had controlled tooth replacement like mammals (mammals exhibit diphyodonty meaning two sets of teeth, the milk teeth and the adult teeth).
More importantly, cynodonts also show partial or complete secondary palates meaning they are able to swallow food and breathe at the same time, something reptiles cannot do. Many taxa also show absence of abdominal ribs allowing for the presence of a diaphragm which increased lung capacity. A diaphragm paired with the secondary palate and tooth occlusion suggests that cynodonts had a higher metabolism than other extant animals of the time. The cynodonts dentary continues to expand further back of the skull.
Some cynodont skulls have small indentations around the nasal region which may be indicative of nerve passages towards sensitive hairs, possibly whiskers, if so, cynodonts had hair. Thrinaxodon and others also have a larger brain size in comparison to the rest of the body than other animals as well as enlarged auditory and olfactory regions suggesting they were nocturnal.

The Permian extinction struck 250Ma due to extensive volcanism of the Siberian Traps leading to a runaway greenhouse effect. Between 80% and 96% of living species died out, including most of the cynodonts and the therapsids. Reasons why the reptiles battled through this extinction and rose to dominate is still debated but it may be due to the fact that reptiles can secrete nitrogenous waste as a uric paste whereas mammals must secrete is as a liquid. This allowed the reptiles to conserve water and see the extinction through.
Whilst most cynodont species perished, a few individuals made it through, they were mostly small, nocturnal burrowers capable of getting water from underground root nodules and tubers. However, the cynodonts would not rise to dominance again but their descendants would, although not for another 200 million years. They would spend the Mesozoic Era in the dinosaurs shadows, their evolution driven by a nocturnal lifestyle and the need for endothermy. The evolution of our ancestors was shaped by the dominance of the dinosaurs, when their reign ended 65 million years ago our true mammalian ancestors would quickly take over the niches left behind and become some of the most spectacular creatures the world has ever seen.

lostinangela  asked:

1 or 11 :)

11) things you said when you were drunk

“I’m sorry.”

Yuuri follows sounds of offbeat knocking to their front door, which he opens to find Victor standing there, his hair sticking up in impossible angles and the bags under his eyes deep, like ridges engraved into his skin. “Victor,” he breathes, confused.

When Victor speaks again, Yuuri understands—he’s drunk. “I’m sorry for what I… What I said,” he says slowly, as though trying hard to remember. He hiccups and with that he falls against the doorway, one palm splayed against the wood to support himself.

Tears stinging his eyes.

(There had been a fight, a day ago.)

(It hadn’t been bad, just a normal domestic dispute, but…)

“Victor,” Yuuri exhales, and takes him into his arms. “Victor, what happened?”

“I started thinking…” Victor answers, and the rest of the words are blubbery, muffled by tears and pain extruding from every syllable, like he’s putting all of his energy into hugging Yuuri and can’t be bothered to focus on words. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, please, don’t be,” he promises, and strokes his arm. “This wasn’t our first fight. What happened? We always… You know that we always figure it out, right?”

Victor takes in a shaky breath, and his words blend. “Called you. I called you. I called you and you didn’t, you never… Twice. I was going to say… I…”

Yuuri removes one arm from his back to lead him inside of the apartment and towards the bedroom. He’s trembling. His skin feels like ice to the touch. “Let’s get you into bed. We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

His fiancé is silent as Yuuri helps him remove his clothes. When he’s down to his boxer briefs, he pulls back the sheets and guides him to sleep in underneath them. Yuuri slips in beside him and is met with huge, watery eyes locked intently on his own. He reaches out a hand and his fingers brush against Victor’s elbow. As soon as the contact is made, there’s a head pillowed against his chest and a body flush against his own.

He smells of alcohol and sweat, but Yuuri only holds him tighter.

“Don’t be mad at me,” Victor whispers against the fabric, and the words are so slurred that Yuuri almost can’t make them out.

(It’s a prayer, he realizes. The words aren’t meant for his ears. Aren’t meant to be heard, aren’t meant to be interpreted.)

Yuuri strokes his hair, tries to lull him to sleep. “I was, but I’d never be mad forever.”

Boyband ~Spencer Reid~

Request: Hi can you please do a spencer Reid x fem reader where he cut off his hair short from s5 ep22 the internet is 4ever. And laughs with others when hotch said if he joined a boy band? Then later on he comes home and pouts all day until she asks she didn’t mean it and that he looks handsome then a few mins later the kiss and then she says cute runs away from him giggling?

Warnings: None

Pairings: Spencer x Reader

Author’s Note: Hola my lovelies. I want to thank ya’ll so much for 307 followers! I am so thankful! Please send in a message or ask or request so that I can get to know you all better. :) 


You sat chuckling at Hotch’s remark. Derek howling with laughter as both JJ and Rossi stifled a laugh. 

“What, no.” Spencer’s voice wavered. You smiled at him and he cast his eyes away from you towards where JJ was briefing us with the new case. 

“We need to get there as soon as possible.” Hotch informed, “Wheels up in thirty.” 

He stalked out of the conference room and a smile broke across Derek’s face one more. 

“So pretty boy, where did you draw inspiration from one direction or west life?” he chuckled and I shook my head as Emily chimed in. 

“I’m afraid it looks like there might also be a five seconds of summer influence there.” 

“I think it looks great babydoll.” Garcia reassured as we gathered our things. You had a few more things to carry with you and you and Spence were the last to exit the room. 

Him fiddling with his hair. 

“C’mon on JT.” you winked and he shook his head. 

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“My wretched hands are so cold.” Loki murmured, holding his deep ridged blue hands up. “They don’t pain me but I know their effects, yet your touch, so warm and gentle…” the blue started to fade as Loki took your hand in his, “you thaw my bitter flesh.”

How would you describe yourself?

Mad.

Maddeningly in love with affliction;
Obsessed with the way it bites,
Leaving deep ridges on the derrière of existence.

No comeback quite as fitting as
The utterly devastating resignation
Of silence pursuant to defeat

All these words couldn’t possibly allude
To the ignoble nature of restlessness
Cognizant of just how expression eludes

I want to say, I want to say, I want to say
Nothing is said, in silence we meander,
Examining the writings on the wall
As if they possess the key to regenerating communication

Alas! Only one statement suffices:

Mad.

Madness.

riding the rails of love

we are riding the rails of our ineffable love
rumbling across the landscape of our passion

fast and smooth over the prairies and plateaus
leaning into the gentle curves at full speed

slow and deliberate along sheer mountain cliffs
reaming the rims and the ridges of deep chasms

thundering along tunnels deep, dark and narrow
filling the surrounding rock with resounding echoes

blazing across bridge and trestle spans so high
the exhilaration so damned intense and undeniable

feeling the soft rise and fall of knolls and hills
the thrum of rhythms tempoed my mother nature

we are riding the rails of our ineffable love
rumbling across the landscape of our passion

89th Academy Awards - nominees

BEST PICTURE
“Arrival”
“Fences”
“Hacksaw Ridge”
“Hell or High Water”
“Hidden Figures”
“La La Land”
“Manchester by the Sea”
“Lion”
“Moonlight”

LEAD ACTOR
Casey Affleck
Andrew Garfield
Ryan Gosling
Viggo Mortensen
Denzel Washington

LEAD ACTRESS
Isabelle Huppert
Ruth Negga
Natalie Portman
Emma Stone
Meryl Streep

SUPPORTING ACTOR
Mahershala Ali
Jeff Bridges
Lucas Hedges
Dev Patel
Michael Shannon

SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Viola Davis
Naomie Harris
Nicole Kidman
Octavia Spencer
Michelle Williams

BEST DIRECTOR
Denis Villeneuve
Mel Gibson
Damien Chazelle
Kenneth Lonergan
Barry Jenkins

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‘I’m up here sweetheart’

Genre: Still Gang AU

Member: Kim Namjoon

Description: Early morning’s revelations brings Namjoon to realize how deep he really has sunk. 

Warning: Descriptions of scars, mentions of blood and gore, swearing, you know the drill by now.

[This had a point but I got off the non-existent point long before this ended. This was bordering fluff but I still believe my angst brought it back. Sorry for it being so late. Anyway. I’m sick. Please shoot me. I’m not a criminal I swear. This is probably my favourite part]

Part 1 I Part 2 I Part 3 I Part 4 I Part 5

He was breathtaking.

As you laid on your bed, half the covers thrown off yourself, you watched with sleepy eyes as his chest fell up and down. His bare chest rose and fell with slow movements, a sure sign he was still asleep. 

His eyes were closed, blocking brown ones you’d become much too familiar with. His hair was a mess, strewn about over his forehead, partly your doing, partly the pillow’s. His mouth lay half open, his lips parted. Lips that had once been on yours and just about everywhere else.

His lean arms were splayed across the bed, the same arms that had held you while you slept. His hands were calloused,scars and rough patches adorned them like battle scars. But wherever you looked you always managed to come back to one place in particular.

His chest.

Scars from switch-blades and butcher knives alike were scattered across his sternum and ribs, harsh white lines on pale skin. Some were long, others were short, but they were all painful. 

Like a sickening tattoo they curved their way along his chest like vines, a horrible reminder of how much time was put into making them. For all the world, they looked like tiny pieces of metal embedded underneath his skin, catching the light and glimmering, mockingly almost. One lay just at the base of his neck, another by his ribcage and too many more to count strewn about aimless across the rest of his front.

They a mismatched puzzle, like an array of stars, connect the dots, hidden messages galore. Tracing them with your eyes, you made new patterns each time. 

You didn’t know much. 

All you really knew was how much he despised them.

Your questions about the array of atrocities that were scattered across his sternum were met with short and unrevealing answers. He would never get angry, he understood the curiosity. He just never entertained it. 

“You don’t wanna hear about that baby”

“Too graphic for you”

“I don’t wanna scare you off princess”

Excuses you were used to. Excuses you didn’t hear any-more, because you didn’t ask. You didn’t mind, really, you didn’t. It was his story, his past, and you didn’t have a right to pry. The same way he respectfully didn’t pry too much into yours.

Your relationship status was too blurry to fathom at this point. Between the late nights you would spend tangled between the sheets or the early morning kisses that would turn into desperate make out sessions you were just in your own little world. You’d go out to dinner sometimes and he would surprise you with coffee some mornings. Your hand was always seen in his and forehead kisses were what you awoke to most mornings. Giddy and childlike banter as you tried to finish college papers, when all he wanted to do was dance with you. Teasing and glares and sarcastic remmarks and late nights and sickening grins and probing kisses and a fairytale like lie you were both all too keen on pretending to live, was just too complicated to begin to explain.

So with blurred morals and a hunger for something exciting, you were content with lying in bed, with one of the most beautiful things you had ever seen.

Your hand found it’s way to his chest, tracing a gash with a butterly touch. Scared of re-opening the long since healed wound, you were still cautious. Soon getting lost in the array of ugly scars that made up his a horrific looking pattern on his chest, you hadn’t noticed Namjoon’s breathing quicken, signalling he was walking up.

He was still breathtaking. Scars and all.

“You know I’ve awoken to pretty strange things happening but this has to be one of the strangest”

His voice was gruff, thicker and deeper from not being used for the time he spent sleeping. It bordered teasing but it still made you shiver, like each syllable the deep thing said was sending a tremor through your body. Perfect lips sounded out words and you found yourself, looking away, back to his chest, to avoid his face.


He didn’t stop you. He just silently let you trace his war scars and he watched, no emotion in cold eyes. He was warm, your fingers were cold, the contrast was nice. Warm hands eventually caught yours as you moved to touch the one near his neck.


“I’m up here sweetheart”


That’s what he had said the first time. The first time he lay on your bed, shirt strewn about, somewhere in the bedroom. Dress pants wrinkled from where you had sat on his thighs.

He remembered you much too well.

You had sat, knees touching, half clothed, as Namjoon had just dicarded his shirt. Half drunk and bordering senseless all you could think to do was reach out, reach out and touch the beautiful scars that adorned his beautiful chest.

Eyes wide you had stared at them, not frightened or disheartened, no look of disgust, just a strange childlike wonder. Many girls Namjoon had slept with were usually confident. Assuming they would be made breakfast the next morning if they gave head the night before. They were sorely mistaken the next morning when Namjoon would ask them to leave, no number, no name, just a harsh ‘last night was fun I guess’ and a quick goodbye. 


He had grown used to your shy movements and tiny sounds. He had looked forward to the way you would cup his neck, like cupping a delicate flower, you were so careful, like he was made of glass and was ready to shatter. His rough hands and scarred chest had never felt such a light touch as your butterfly kisses probing their way along his sternum. 


His night of rough stress relieving sex had been scrapped when your drunken smile had stared down at scars with such a weird appreciation and wonder. Most girls didn’t care, they were there for the casual hook up, much like him. Some asked, none got answers. 


But you, oh god, you were mesmerized by the deep ridges of knife scars on Namjoon’s chest.


And you, to his utter confusion, still were.
“Sweetheart, stop.” he tried again.
You eventually gave in, looking at him with an expression he had never thought he would be met with. Your eyes were turned towards, almost saddened by his statement, shaking your head, hair fell into your eyes. He waited for your reaction, expecting one. You lay on your stomach, hands a makeshift pillow for your face, half lidded eyes disappointed. 


Your eyes found his and he found himself confused with your reply.
“They’re beautiful” you whispered, staring down at the deep knife gashes with one of the saddest smiles he’d ever seen.

He was dumbstruck. His eyes widened at your bold statement, looking at you with a face of both confusion and awe. He wasn’t expecting that. And your next action, left him even more wordless.
Leaning forward slowly, you pressed your lips to the scar just below his neck, holding them in place for a few seconds before briskly turning your back to him and returning to your side of the bed.


Namjoon had laid, staring at the place you had been few seconds before, unmoving, trying to wrap his head around the situation.
No one ever asked really asked, not daring to tease Namjoon’s short temper. No one ever really got answers either. Only a few knew why the gangster had such a scarred chest. 


But he had never encountered such a strange word for them.


Beautiful.


When he looked down at them, all he saw was the bitter reminder of laying on an alley floor, blearing pain, too much blood and the constant slip between reality and a nightmare. The glint of a knife and the glimmer of a smirk. The horrible sound of wheels stopping on tarmac and the smell of burning rubber. Gasoline bottles and cigarettes were a deadly mix, and when someone takes a knife to you there wasn’t much you could do but grin and bear it.
But as he traced the deep ridge where your lips had been, he had pushed those thoughts away.


They were beautiful then, he concluded, anything that had the honour of being touched by you was.

Early mornings blur into one and nobody may have a chance to differentiate, the sweetness of the softest kisses that beckon us all with open arms to lie in the warm embrace of another just a little longer and the ugliest of truths we must all succumb to eventually.

For now we lie, in both senses of the word, in the promise of another’s warmth, without the threat of much, but the cold air outside the covers and the taste of bitter coffee, rendering our goodbyes, not forever, but maybe very much that. 

[Probably the end. Anyone who really wants more may request it. I’d be more than happy to start another Namjoon series. Or another member. I will cator to the people’s thirst as always]

I really adore my dental team tbh??

Okay this is an uncommon appreciation post, I know it’s odd to do?? But my main dentist and the whole dental team who helps me is amazing ;-; my dental assistant (of course I asked if I could write about her in my blog, because otherwise that would be kinda rude and respect is important!) just married her long time gf, and she opened up to me about their adorable cooking sessions and how amazing her wife is at cooking and she gave me some zucchini bread muffins??!! When I told her that my girlfriend @becauseimawesomethatswhy also loves to cook and is so talented at it, we both freaked out and had a really gay moment, omg. Then we talked about hummingbirds and beak sizes across populations! !

Also my dentist is rad as hell. We discussed a ton of the science behind dentistry and the chemistry behind my personal dental proceedures!! It was so interesting!! He’s always so concerned about my health, and he loves my teeth/compliments them a lot; even though they’re a pain in the ass to fix minor problems (my teeth are apparently in great shape, but my molars are abnormally sharp and have very deep ridges which makes fixing tiny decay issues difficult). He did a bunch of extra work for free for me today because he knows I’m not independent/I’m jobless, uhhg.

They are so kind. After all the literal torture surgical proceedures I’ve been through and all the bad doctors I’ve had, I just -REALLY- appreciate medical specialists who are helpful and kind.

The Wealth Below

A commission for a friend. Toa Lehari of Earth, passing the time by using his particular talents to bring up valuable gems from the bottom of an underground lake or something. This is the first commission I’ve done where I haven’t had a MOC to work off of for the design of the subject (though I’ve done the same for plenty of my own characters), and I mostly tried to keep the theme set by the Mask of Emulation that he wears: lots of ridges with deep-set, circular ‘cores’ in opportune spots.

Headcanon Wednesday: Baby Turians

Been a while since I’ve been able to do a headcanon Wednesday post.  It feels great to be back. :D

Infant turians don’t have the thick metallic plates or the reflective skin cuticle that their elders do. Instead, they’re born with a layer of fine inorganic fibers; when damp, the fibers are transparent and lie flat to the body, but as the infant dries off they turn into a thick, silver-white down. To put it briefly: baby turians are fluffy. (While gestating, turian mothers generally develop strong cravings for plants that are high in certain minerals, which are then passed to the fetus; during prenatal development, the fetus turns those inorganic compounds into the down.)

Keep reading

Hair Cut
Requested by Missiarty

Selected - Ruki, Kou, Shuu and Kanato
Kink - Humiliation and Hair

Unable to control himself with how beautiful they said you were and how they have been looking at you. When you belonged to him, he cut your hair, taking a part of you that attributed to your beauty p, proving to himself you belonged to him, that he could do anything to you because you will, always be his.

Your chest burned with embarrassment as you blinked away the tears that threatened to trickle down your flushed cheeks. As you wrapped your arms around yourself, with each soft leering and disapproving remarks playing over and over in the back of your mind. Till all the snickers and jeering comments swirled around as the tears started to spill. While you bite softly into your bottom lip to hold back the sounds of your sobs as you ran your hand through your choppy short hair, which stick out in uneven spikes. That he had snipped your hair into yesterday before bed, because this was your punishment, but the worse was throughout the day as you endured the mocking leers from your peers you wondered why and what. Why were you being punished this way, and what for? Why did he chop your hair off? You questioning, mulling over past events to try and conclude what warrant such this punishment.As the jeering laughs and mocking snickers become too much as you broke out run.
Not paying attention where you were going you ran deep and deep into the high school, till the students dwindled down till finally you were alone. As your legs gave out and you collapsed to the ground, your shoulders shaking as your soft sobs echoed throughout the abandoned hallway of the old science wing of the school.

Ruki

Smirking at you as you trembling and sobbed at his feet, with your fingers twisted into your short hair and your legs brought to your chest.Ruki mercilessly taunted you as he crouched in front of you,
“Succumb to pitiful tears already livestock?” As he grabbed your chin firmly and forced you to look into his gray blue eyes that danced with delight.
Your breathing shuttered as your bottom lip trembled, catching Ruki attention as he ran his cold thumb slowly over it, feeling the deep ridges where you had been bitting into it. He growled lost as his eyes darkened,
“How disgraceful it was, attracting the attention of other suitors when you already have a Master.” Ruki hissed possessively, before he smuggle smirked,
“I’m sure they are not sparing a second glance at you now with how childish you look.” You closed your eyes at Ruki’s harsh words, as you softly whimpered, and Ruki moved closer so that his breath was hitting your bottom lip.
“How foolish they are as well, from being deterred from a woman due to the simple factor of your hair.” The grasp on your chin grew softer as his hand moved up to cup your cheek as he growled,
“Now understand this, your mine livestock, it doesn’t matter what others think, it should only matter what I think. Since I am your Master.” He purred, reassured those classmates wouldn’t be wanting

Kou

“Fufu~ m-neko-chan looks even more ugly crying on the floor~ that its cute.” Kou chuckled merrily as you heard the light click of his camera going off.
“Look at me m-neko-chan!” He chimed playfully as you dropped your hands and looked up at him, your wide eyes meeting his bicolored ones, with his crimson eye staring into the confusion that swirled in your heart. Which he chuckled at softly, as he took another picture,
“I believe you even more enticing his way, collapsed on the floor pathetically sobbing, heh your so hideous like this. They think so too, everyone does.” He growled jealously while remembering those classmates’ desires towards you, you were his and his alone, no one else could have you.
“Your my kitten, my maschoistic little kitten, you’ll take everything I give to you and let me take anything I want.” Kou purred, his eye turning back to blue as he slipped his phone into his pocket and grabbed your shirt and choppy hair twisting his fingers and yanking her head back. As he crouching in front of you, while running his fingers over your throat, which was covered in hickeys and bite marks.
“Your such good girl, how should I reward you?” he mused as he lowered his head and brushed his lips on your soft spot before sinking his fangs in, moaning loudly as your blood flooded his mouth.
“Your so sweet little kitten, I’ll give you something just as sweet tonight as I pleasure you m-neko-chan.”

Shuu

Sighing softly Shuu slumped to the ground beside you, as he grabbed your wrist and yanking you into his lap, forcing you to straddled his waist. As he curled up, resting your head on his chest,
“Why?” You questioned as twisted his sweater in your grasp, your tears seeping into his shirt,
“Everyone was looking at you song bird, and your mine understand.” He smirked, as he roughly grabbed your chin and made you look up at him, as he wiped away your tears with his thumb.
“Your body is mine, your heart is mine, as for your blood too, down to the very last drop. No one will take you from me, and I can do anything I want to you.” He growled darkly as his grasp softened and his hand moved down to your neck as he cupped the back of it and lower his head.
Brushing his lips across yours,
“I own you, little song bird, how about I make you sing for me tonight and chase away all the tears as I drag you deeper into my world.” Shuu’s voice grew dark as he crashed his lips against yours, as he sank his fangs into your bottom lip with your blood mixing with your salty tears.
“Sing for me tonight little song bird.”

Kanato

“ Chuckling lightly Kanato stared at you as you trembled on the floor,
“Cry for me some more why don’t you? Then maybe I’ll forgive you for tempting those vile boys in your class when your my little doll.” Kanato hissed with jealousy as he remembered how they looked at you, how they undressed you is their eyes, when you were his.
“Don’t worry, we will get your hair fixed cutely, so that you resemble a doll even more. Just remember that I can do what I please with you, everyone should remember. No matter how you look I will always adore you, even with how stupid you look sobbing on the floor like a worm. It’s cute though, cry some more out of embarrassment for me.” He giggled as he got in his hands and knees crawling toward you,
“Though I might like this look even more, sobbing underneath me while your covered in my freshly made marks.” He purred as he ran his fingers over the newest bite mark,
“Close your eyes and accept everything I inflict on you, the pleasure, the pain, take it all little doll.” Kanato told you with a husky voice,
“As I dirty you more and more.” Wrapping his hand around your neck, Kanato groaned softly at the idea of what more he could to you, of how he could play with his little doll.

“Loki,” You whined pitifully, “I’m so cold.”

Loki rolled over in bed to look at you curiously, “You’re covered in blankets, love.” His voice was still scratchy from sleep and normally the sound would excite you, but right now, your body ached all over and any such thoughts was easily forced away.

Slowly you shook your head, mind changing, though you immediately regretted it. “I’m warm.” You hastily pushed your blankets away, groaning at the movement.

Loki’s frown deepened as he pressed the back of his hand to your forehead. “You’re burning up, is this one of those ‘flu’s we’ve discussed?”

Your mouth fell open, “Damn.” Previous plans to get up quickly fell away as you slumped back into your pillows. “What about the shindig or whatever Tony’s calling it, isn’t that today?”

“Oh how dreadful, a reason to skip out on socializing with those insufferable mortals and have you all to myself instead?” Loki grinned.

You closed your eyes, rubbing them at the pounding in your skull. “Not like we’ll do anything, I feel like hell Loki.”

Loki chuckled, “A reason to pamper and care for my queen? That’s hardly nothing, and I’m sure when I have you feeling better, you’ll be more than happy to make up for time wasted.”

You cracked an eyelid open and smirked ruefully, “You really are incorrigible, aren’t you?”

“Comes with the territory of being a god, love, now then, what can I do for you? Back rub, breakfast of soup in bed?” Loki offered, slowly easing himself out of bed.

You watched him, arm thrown over your eyes though pulled away enough to watch him. Shirtless, only in his black sleeping bottoms, it was always hard to pass up the opportunity to admire him - even feeling like this. Loki crossed his arms, turning back to face you.

“And you say I’m insatiable?” The corner of his mouth quirked upward as Loki stared at you darkly.

“Yes to everything.” You mumbled finally, “But also, do you think, maybe, just maybe….” You trailed off, knowing he would prompt you to continue.

Loki scowled, noting the change in your tone, “What?” He deadpanned, hardly even asking, almost demanding an answer.

“That thing, where you make yourself really cold, your true heritage,” You hesitated as Loki’s eyes flashed angrily, “it would cool me down so much Loki, please, I know you don’t like it but I’m dying here.”

Pressing his lips together, you could see Loki weighing his options. At long last, he breathed in heavily, “Very well, but you have no idea what you owe me.”

“Thanks Loki, you’re the best.”

Loki shook his head slowly, finally sinking back onto the bed as he focused on the illusion keeping him his usual pallor. “I am indeed.” He grumbled, focusing his magic.

“I love you.” You whispered, watching in awe as the magic shimmered over his skin and blue slowly spread along him. Deep ridges etched along his skin, spreading with the blue, before he turned to face you, opening his ruby red eyes.

“And I love you.” He shook his head, “Even when you ask me to do such tasteless things, I’ll never understand your fascination with this form.”

You managed to smile, reaching for him and pulling him into your arms. His touch chilled you instantly and Loki grabbed the blankets, trying to balance your temperature.

“Only until you love yourself, all of yourself, as much as I do.” You whispered, pressing a weak kiss to his cheek.

“You’re a fool to love me, but I appreciate it all the same. Now hush, it must be the delirium of this fever getting to you.” Loki stroked his chilly fingers along your skin and you sighed in relief.

“You’ll see some day, I promise.”

“Of course, now sleep, we can talk more when you feel better.”

Masada - Israel

Situated on the eastern ridge of the Judaean Desert, this ancient fortification overlooks the dead sea. Herod the Great first built his palaces here, in 31 BCE, after seizing the land from Alexander Jannaeus, the second king of Judaea. The location was a perfect refuge from danger, due to the deep valleys and ridges surrounding it. The cliffs themselves reach heights of up to 400m. 

Masada is the most visited tourist site in Israel, outside of Jerusalem. Of all the structures on Masada, the synagogue and mikvah’s are the most popular. A sunrise hike is a favoured way of getting to the top of Masada, although in more recent times, cable cars have also been added to transport visitors to the top. 

Finally finished this beast! It’s painted on an A2 deep ridged canvas - something I don’t work on often. It’s painted from my photograph of Lyme Park a couple of years ago, in acrylics!