deception...disgrace

04.29.17

I will forget all the promises I’ve heard from Jim
When he told me he would take me back to Los Angeles
Forget how he said I was his reason to be
Or how he said my lips tasted like honey

I will also forget how Tom used to caress me
Barely able to contain himself, I will always regret not being able to be his
Completely, how could I not notice that he was this kinda man?

Now, thinking about Peter fills me with dread
How his big blue eyes and awkward self intimated me
From day one
Do you remember how I was so embarrassed to even say hi?

Paul, I shall command you for your honesty
It was physical all along
And it may be a little bit out of place to mention you
When it was never even love
But I’ve found myself craving for your touch
For what seems like an eternity

Now, the thing that all of you have in common, is that none of you respected me
None of you ever acknowledged my worth
You complimented things like my kiss, my chest or the way that I look
None of you ever acknowledged my soul

Now, you, mystery man, I’ve got high expectations for
I want you to hold me tight in your big arms and tell me that it’s all gone
That fate won’t ever fail me, and that you have always been the one

I just hope that you will be able to kiss like Tom
That you fill me up completely just like Paul
And that you have that hidden sweetness that Peter once showed
But please, don’t you ever be like Jim

Jim, I don’t think I will ever be able to forgive you
How could you leave me alone for such petty reasons
I thought that our love was written in the stars
But you wouldn’t even say a word

I think you were a cheater, because you were cheating yourself all along
Never allowing yourself to heal, to feel, to love

Mystery man, lead me to the end of the road
I want to see the rainbow, I think that I deserve hope
I want to make peace with my decisions
I need to know this is where I belong

I am tired of giving myself to men like Peter, Paul, Jim and Tom.

                  All my friends are Heathens, take it slow

                            Wait for them to ask you who you know
                              Please don’t make any sudden moves
                               You don’t know the half of the Abuse

Musicals I know nothing about but my siblings love
  • Heathers: main chick straight up vigilante murders her boyfriend
  • Newsies: Gay, that's it. Everyone is gay
  • Rent: Film dude never gets the girl
  • Les mis: everything is sung and Sophie from Mama Mia marries Eddie Redmayne.
  • Into the woods: Grimms brothers with a sound track
  • Wicked: the wicked witch is gay(?) for Gilinda?????
  • Annie: little redhead adopts bald man
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woah a new post :’)!! ✨

Sorry for not posting for a very long time, had a rough time + non-academic work has been piling up non-stop, but I sneaked in some study time!!

I’m very grateful for me bc I pushed myself to wakeup early (8am, in which i usually wake up @ 1pm). :’^)

I’ve been so inactive yet I’ve reached 350+ followers 😭😭 Thank you so much!! It means a lot to me, really.

During World War II, there was a large push for recruitment of some of the best art students across the country to join the United States Army.  They formed a “deception unit”, or a “ghost army” that appeared to look like a huge mass of soldiers, tanks, trucks and artillery.  However, it was all smoke and mirrors, consisting of inflatable tanks, sound design, and clever applications of fake tank tracks overnight.  Actors also met in pubs, planting false information.  This distracted the enemy from the real troops who were gathering.

To learn more about this fascinating undertaking, which was only de-classified fairly recently, check out the podcast on the subject from 99% Invisible.  (Photo from Retronaut/Mashable, England, c. 1939) 

happy birthday @hollywoodcassiecage, have a baehee 🙌
i saw u post about having a bad bday so i was hoping to cheer u up
also sorry its kinda sloppy and grey, i had to rush the shading and all that bcs time runs goddamn fast and for the first time in my life i was swamped

Some Gochi for my followers, love you guys! Thanks for being there, enjoying my fanart and my blog :)