deal with the insanity

Here’s something ya’ll might find funny. A random dude messaged me after seeing my bear incident story and turns out his life is just as crazy and wild as mine. Long story short he’s a crazier version of James Bond and I’m Kim Possible with a dash of Lara Kroft. Basically ya’ll should thank your lucky stars he’s currently living in Russia because can you IMAGINE the havoc we would wreak as friends irl because we would be the most dangerous freakishly lucky friends in existence

  • Jyugo: Why is blood so hard to wash off your hands?
  • Jyugo: I JUST REALIZED HOW BAD THIS SOUNDS. FOR THE RECORD, I HAD A NOSE BLEED, I’M NOT A SERIAL KILLER.
  • Nico: But we all know that’s not quite true.
  • Uno: Hydrogen peroxide dissolves blood, just fyi.
  • Rock: Do you think if you gave someone a huge shot of hydrogen peroxide straight into their bloodstream it would kill them?
  • Hajime: This cell is filled with murderers.
2

“These are our Ghost Adventures.”

 Overview by @markhamillz[thanks for bringing up the idea for this Ghost Adventures AU!! ;)]

Judy: Is absolutely sure of the existence of ghosts. Mostly because she can communicate with them, and feels a need to help bring them peace.
Nick: Initially only joining for the paycheck, Nick at first dismisses Judy’s claims, but then sees evidence she may be for real. Is slowly starting to be more aware of the supernatural. Also, the crush on the cute bunny helps too.
Finnick: They promised him a paycheck. He still doesn’t know why the hell he’s gotta put up with this bullshit, but the paychecks are good, so he guesses he’ll deal with this insanity.”


Hogwarts Houses When Angry
  • for anon
  • Gryffindor: vents physically- slamming doors, throwing things, performing every action wildly. They're likely to be angry criers.
  • Slytherin: gives the person they're angry with the silent treatment, makes snide remarks. Plans a million ways to exact revenge
  • Ravenclaw: vents verbally- yelling or not, they tell the person exactly why they're angry. Tend to escalate until they can't deal with it
  • Hufflepuff: insanely passive-aggressive, and tends to be bitter for weeks after a big fight. Try their hardest to restrain themselves while angry

I like to think that the information we’ve gotten about the american magical world comes entirely from outdated Hogwarts textbooks. like there’s a chapter in Hogwarts: a History on the wizarding school it inspired in america. and of course a bunch of it is exactly what happened…if you ignore everything that doesn’t make the old country look fabulous. Because of course the school based on Hogwarts,  founded by an Irish Immigrant, descendant of a Hogwarts founder would be the first and best and only decent wizarding school in America. Imagine teenage/early 20’s Hermione visiting the USA and realizing the chapter on Ilvermorney in “Hogwarts, a History” was  half entirely outdated and half colonial propaganda. like, she ’s in a room full of american wizards, and causally asks one which house she was in in Ilvermorny, and the other’s all, “oh, well, I actually didn’t go to Ilvermorny, I’m from Texas and I attended Nuestra Señora del los Milagros. Um…lesse, George and Ani both had after school programs, at least I know George was trained with the other magical children in his tribe, and I think Ani had a sort of cram school dojo thing she would port key to. Louise went to a magical school in New Orleans whose name I can’t pronounce right and which is pretty secretive, so you’d have to ask her about it. It definitely wasn’t one of your traditional English style boarding schools though. um, Saria is from Utah, and her no-maj school had free periods available for religious or magical studies during the school day. I think out of all of us only Sinjin and William went to Ilvermorny, but I think Sinjin was expelled for protesting the house names, fairly creatively I might add. Honestly it’s mostly upper class and traditional families that send their kids all the way to Ilvermorny nowadays, it’s just not that practical, even if you want a traditionally English magical education.”

3

Distress (Joker x Pregnant! Reader)

“Imagine almost losing your baby when a deal goes wrong and it causing the Joker to go crazy.”

Requested by Anon: “Can you write one where the reader is pregnant and a deal goes bad and she almost loses the baby and mr j goes insane?!”

Warnings: Blood, violence, “almost” baby loss, mentions of torture.


Just a regular business deal, one he’d done a hundred times before today. Nothing was suppose to go wrong.

You sat alone in the car. His words echoing in your head as you leaned back in the leather seats.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon.”

A sigh left you as you stared out the window at the rundown warehouse. You ran your hand along the top of your stomach, smiling softly as you did. Despite you the fact carrying the child of the most dangerous man in Gotham, you had never been happier.

Keep reading

Dating

I can’t deal with people playing mind games, it’s driving me insane. The waiting situation too, in society we’re supposed to wait these time frames before initiating contact because you might seem too eager or possibly desperate. You say one thing and mean the other, “you’re not sure about your emotions” but then you instigate conversation which could be perceived as flirting/ drawing attention. Having to tone down your passion, your emotions because they might think you’re too interested straight off the bat. Messaging every night to nothing at all whilst wondering if you did anything wrong to create this. Going on dates with multiple people become more of a marathon than an enjoyable, pleasurable experience. Everyone seems to glorify this part of life, they forget the heartbreak, messy, emotionally draining trainwreck that it can be. Not to mention if you want to ask a lady out, it’s better to do it in person. I blame technology for ruining this.

-A Scorpio Woman 

Can I be super negative for a second?

I am super disappointed that the ACOTAR series is being made into movies. I don’t think they will work as films at all.

Sorry if people are super excited for them.

The way that my brain reads books is completely in movie form (like most people probably). I provide camera angles, position the characters like I’m setting a scene, and when I think back on a book I revise or consolidate to what would fit best in movie form. (Do people do that?? idk. Like when I heard HP7 and Mockingjay were being split, I automatically knew where they would put the break and people thought I was crazy, but I digress)

When I heard that TOG was being made a show I was thrilled because you CANNOT put those books in movies. It’s too much material, especially later on in the series obviously. But with TOG, it is made for the big screen (or you know, little screen, whatever). Set pieces, grand finales, characters overlapping and puzzle pieces fitting together, action packed, etc

But that’s not how acotar is at all. If anything, it COULD work as a series as well, but with difficulty.

You could argue that Thorns and Roses could be made into a movie but I think it would be hard to make it have the right flow. Not to mention, Sarah throws a wrench in the narrative when Feyre goes UtM, it’s a complete mood shift, and UtM would eat considerable screen time. So everything else would be abbreviated- but you know, it’s Tamlin so that’s not too bad.

Then acomaf happens. You guys, acomaf will never work on a big screen. No way, no how.

1. It’s LONG. It is the slow burn of all slow burns. Movies don’t deal in slow.   Consolidating that slow burn into a movie would cut out INSANE amounts of character development.  As a reader, you love each of those moments between Feyre and Rhys, and how it helps Feyre SLOWLY heal and trust him and love him. And there are a million of those little moments. And with the highly sensitive nature of her healing from abuse, good luck putting all that in 2.5 hours without botching it, rushing it, or cutting out all but 5 scenes which will just make me so sad.

2. It’s introspective. There are a whole lot of things that happen in this book that don’t play out in the open. Not to mention that this is not an Action book like TOG, it’s a Feelings book. There’s a lot of sensing and thinking and internal monologues and reading others’ thoughts. When you are reading acomaf and every other conversation is happening internally down the bond, it makes sense. You know what you get when you put that on screen? annoying voice overs and characters staring at each other for an uncomfortable amount of time. There is absolutely no time for all that shit- UNLESS…

3. When you think about it, the whole book is already set up EPISODICALLY. Look, I’ll even give some of these episodes titles:

The Wedding. The Night Court. Locked In. The City of Starlight. The Bone Carver. The Court of Nightmares. Summer. Starfall.  Do you see where I am going with this? Call me, Netflix.

Basically I have a vision for how this is going to go and I don’t think a movie could ever do it justice and will probably make everything seem really contrived and rushed. Lastly, and just because I’ve been burned too many times by the film industry. I’ll give my predictions:

“Are you #teamtamlin or #teamrhysand? Retweet your favorite acotar man!”

White Rhysand. That’s all.

Side characters with any depth? What’s that?

Subtlety and and character-led story telling? What’s that?

Pros and Cons of dating me
  • Pros:
  • •you get someone completely dedicated to you
  • •no risk of being cheated on if you have my heart because no one else interests me
  • •cuddles and hugs whenever possible
  • •free food and drinks
  • •random neck kisses and hand holding
  • •will listen to you talk for hours
  • •tries to avoid pressuring you into things or doing things you don't like
  • Cons:
  • •having to talk to my mom if you want me at your house
  • •dealing with my crippling anxieties and depression
  • •my insecurities never go away and you're stuck trying to lessen them anyways
  • •having to deal with my insane level of clinginess
  • •i'm an idiot
  • •i can't cope with things very well
  • •i'll end up forcing you into things without realizing and hating myself for the rest of my life
  • •i cry way too easily
  • •i don't let go
  • •i'm a piece of rubbish
  • •there are no real pros to dating me
  • •why are you still reading this
  • •i'm really sorry

traveling-magpie  asked:

You prolly won't read this for a while because I know you get a bazillion asks, but can you explain (or link if you have before, I couldn't find it) what the deal is with this T.I.G.E.R.S. insanity? Who is this guy? How does he get away with the crap he's accused of?

You’ll want to check out @bigcatawareness‘ tag on T.I.G.E.R.S for the most specific information. I have not made a masterpost about him because I would prefer to not have him threaten to sue me, and yes, he does that shit. He once went after someone I know for simply writing about how what he was saying about white tigers was factually incorrect - when threatening them with a lawsuit from a lawyer who didn’t exist didn’t work, he tried to bribe them into taking it offline. This is how he gets away with things. He’s apparently threatened to sue The Dodo - which is backed by HuffPost - so that tells you how much money he has to throw around when he’s unhappy about something. 

His internship is cult-like. Here’s the internship requirements. Don’t drink anything while you’re reading it if you value your computer. 

He likes to tell people how breeding color morph tigers saves them from extinction and how ligers make people care about big cat conservation. He actually has at least five websites he runs (I keep finding more) where he cites himself as an expert so that his facility pages can cite his expert work. 

He actually runs two facilities, one of which is ZAA accredited and decent (ish) and one of which is a tiger holding facility in an outdoor shopping mall in which people can pay to hold baby tigers for a photo. It is incredibly hard to figure out they are the same organization but not related to each other because their websites don’t always link to each other as you’d expect for two facilities being run under the same company. 

I’ve managed to confirm with ZAA that he’s straight out running around their bans on cub exploitation by lending himself cubs - they don’t regulate who an accredited facility can lend animals. They are not pleased. They have no recourse. 

Here’s his list of USDA violations going back as long as he’s been in business. Note the comments from USDA about he’s not trustworthy and how he was caught trying to flee the scene of his lion injuring a model. (Yes, it’s a PETA link, but I’ve confirmed the data is accurate). 

When you visit his facility you pay a couple hundred bucks to be allowed to hang out free-contact with an untethered asian elephant, hold month-old tiger cubs, and let wolf puppies run over your legs. You  can’t take photos and he attempts to retain the copyright of the ones taken for you. 

I can’t confirm any of the projects his Rare Species Fund conservation program runs actually contribute to conservation. He probably hasn’t bothered to update his website in a while, since he hasn’t exhibited his ligers and tigers on chains on a stage at King Richard’s Faire in MA for two years, but it is still listed as one of his biggest projects. Most of the other projects involved lending cats out as actors or are things I can’t find on google. 

People I’ve talked to who worked for him won’t talk about him because it’s too upsetting. People who I’ve talked to who have to interface with him professionally just avoid him as much as possible. 

I suggest you look through BCA’s tags and draw your own conclusion. 

  • Arwen: Mine is the choice of Luthien.
  • Elrond: What?! So you're gonna escape from home, deal with a couple of insane princes, take Sauron's tower, rescue your boyfriend and then give up on your immortality to live a few decades with him in the middle of nowhere?!
  • Arwen: No daddy, I'm just gonna wait here until my boyfriend saves the world and becomes king then I'll go be his queen.
  • Elrond: ...
  • Elrond: Well, it's okay then. I guess.

oh this jacket? oh it’s nothing haha… it used to belong to poe dameron you know the legendary starfighter pilot who like flew his x-wing into starkiller base and fired the shot that destroyed the whole thing? right so like before that he went to jakku on this little solo mission to like, retrieve the map to luke skywalker, like i said, no big deal, and while he was on that mission he got captured and he happened to run into ME aboard kylo ren’s star destroyer because i was like, a storm trooper - long story - but i like didn’t want to be a storm trooper anymore SO i rescued him from his prison cell and we stole a TIE fighter and shot out a bunch of the star destroyer’s cannons lmaoooooooooo it was so crazy but like i said no big deal like it was just whatever for him he’s the best pilot in the galaxy but it was also no big deal for me because i’m like??? insanely brave and also the only storm trooper to ever escape from the first order like literally absolutely no big deal as i was saying so anyway we had to crash land on jakku b/c of like… circumstances… and poe like parachuted away to safety at some point but i landed with the wreck and this badass leather jacket was still in the ship so i like grabbed it and put it on and it looked so good on me i mean like you can see it on me right now you know it looks good… but i mean it looked SO good i just kept it on the whole time i was running around on this godforesaken sand planet even though it was super hot and i was about to pass out and dying of thirst lol ANYWAY some bullshit went down and THEN i ran into poe back at the rebel base and he was like “hey is that my jacket” and i was like “oh shit sorry dude” and i went to take it off and he was LITERALLY like “no, keep it, it suits you” and i like, died. so anyway i guess it’s like the second movie now and i’m still wearing this thing haha that is so crazy but like i said it’s really no big deal i mean rian johnson literally posted fanart of me like KISSING poe on the mouth while poe holds me in a warm and tender embrace but it’s like, whatever, you know? it’s like really no big deal. i’m just wearing poe dameron’s cool leather jacket for the second movie in a row and i’m pairing it with this v-neck i got at the american apparel liquidation sale.

My Mistake Chapter 4

Pairing: AJ Styles x OFC (Jessica), mention of AJ x Charlotte

Rating: General

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1,863

Summary: Jessica, a stylist for WWE, has a special friendship with AJ Styles, spending most of her time with him. But after the Superstar Shake-up and Charlotte coming to Smackdown, Jessica’s relationship with AJ changes drastically. And Jessica is not sure she can handle these changes.

Inspiration: “It’s my mistake for not making you love me more. It’s my mistake for loving you more than you love me. I did not make you love me more as much as I do. It’s my mistake” - SNSD “My Mistake”

My Mistake Masterlist

That night after the show AJ head to the hotel wore out. The brutal match with Jindar taking a toll on his body, and then all this stuff with Jessica and Charlotte is mentally exhausting. He is actually thankful that Charlotte decided to ride with Becky; he needed a break and a chance to think everything over. He checks the time and sees how late it actually is. There is no way Jessica will want to talk to him now, she will be too tired.

‘I’ll just wait until tomorrow to talk to her. Let her calm down from tonight and get a good nights rest.’ AJ thinks to himself.

He sets his phone down with a sigh and then heads to the bathroom for a quick shower before bed.

Keep reading

1. Don’t Panic: If you’re reading this, you’re upset that you failed the class, and it’s good that you care. Don’t freak out, it’s not the end of the world. You either did or didn’t try your best, but there’s not much you can do about that now. 


2. Meet with an Advisor: There will be two options - either re-take the class, or move on (if it’s not an essential one). The plus-side to retaking is that it’ll be easier the second time around, the downside being that it’s going to take up time you could be using for another class. Moving on is a good option if it’s not going to mess up your GPA. 


3. Make a Plan:First of all, there’s a reason you failed. Figure out what that reason is. Was the class hard? Did you have extenuating circumstances? Or did you just not work hard enough? Regardless of the reason, figure out how you’re not going to fail again. 


4. Don’t Feel Guilty: It’s hard not to feel bad when you’re using your parents money for college, or you’re dealing with insane loans. But, you have to just move on. Continually stressing about it won’t change the failing grade, it’ll more likely contribute to future stress.

Does anyone else think newly human Gabriel would have issues with the height of his vessel?

I keep picturing him in the kitchen of the bunker, cooking something special for Sam, and he needs something from the top shelf. The boys don’t think about putting things up there, they can both reach it just fine, Gabriel though… Not so much. 

And he’s muttering, dragging a groaning chair across the floor. He’s not going to ask someone to help him, but he’s gonna make sure they all know that he needed something off that shelf. 

“Damn brothers and their perfect gene pool,” he mutters as he climbs up, “never think about anyone else around here. What about the people who aren’t nine feet tall?” 

And once he’s got the powdered sugar in his hand and he turns to drag the chair back he sees Sam. The giant is just standing there, casually being tall as he leans into the doorway. His long arms are crossed, and so are his ankles, as he watches Gabriel with a tiny smug smile on his face. 

Gabriel drags the chair again, even louder this time. 

Sam raises his voice to be heard over the racket. “You know you can ask for help with stuff like that, right?”

And Gabriel is so irritated today by all the insanely annoying human things he has to deal with that he turns on Sam in a flash. He crosses the room, sticking a finger in Sam’s chest.

“Screw you, Sam Winchester! You with your impossibly long legs. You probably don’t think anything about putting stuff almost to the ceiling, do you! No, you wouldn’t, not with those arms! Look at them, you’re like an orangutan or somethin’!” Gabriel motions up and down Sam’s entire body, like he’s disgusted. “And that stupid pretty face, with those damn dimples that make me wanna kiss you! It’s not fai– mmmff!

Sam cuts off the tirade with a kiss to the ex-angels lips. 

Gabriel melts, slowly relaxing, irritation draining away. He sags against Sam, then lifts up on his tip toes to kiss the hunter deeper. This is one thing he likes about being short, going up on his toes to kiss Sam. 

When they break apart Gabriel rests his forehead in Sam’s chest, the hunter’s arms wrapped tight around him. That’s something he kind of likes about being smaller than Sam too. 

“Don’t know why I picked such a short vessel, that was dumb,” he complains, words muffled into Sam’s flannel. 

“I don’t know,” Sam says into his hair, “I’m kind of fond of this vessel.” 

Gabriel smiles, though he doesn’t let Sam see it. “You just like my perfect ass.” 

That gets a laugh out of the hunter. “That, and a few other things.” 


I don’t know. I’m having all these newly human Gabriel thoughts today.          And I’m at work and can’t concentrate.

anonymous asked:

Can I maybe be linked to the hanahaki disease fics (I hope I spelled that right) because I found the concept interesting

Bloom (wattpad) - When a person falls in unrequited love, a flower begins to bloom in their chest, causing them to cough up flower petals. This causes a great deal of pain, often driving the victim to the point of insanity. The latest victim? Dan Howell, of course. Lucky him.   Will he be able to suffer through it? Or will the pain make him lose his mind?

Flooded Lungs (ao3) - the usual 2009, long-distance meeting story- but Dan has Hanahaki disease, where unrequited love causes someone to cough up flowers, until the love becomes requited… or they suffocate.  Dan is angsty, phil is sweet, and yellow tulips are everywhere.

Sun Speckled Roses (ao3) - Phil and Dan. Dan and Phil. The two had best friends for years. Phil had always hidden his feelings for Dan under his emotions for everyone close to him. When knowledge of the Hanahaki Disease spreads through the English nation, it seemed the so called plague began spreading even faster. When Phil began coughing up the petals of both pink roses and sunflowers, he knew everything was ending in pretty pinks and bright yellows. 

Yellow Roses (ao3) - (TW) There were a few times when Dan knew he was in love. However, he didn’t realize how fucked he was until the flowers came.

- Sam