deal with my truth

There will be times when I will not be able to forget, all that remains is to learn how to deal with it.
—  Things I realized when I wondered what I would tell my high school self, part VI
King of the Lost Boys - Anthony Ramos x Reader (Chapter 2)

Summary: A leather jacket needs to be returned to it’s rightful owner, leading to an uncovering that isn’t at all ideal. Things are repaired. A home is found. Then, the world starts to suck again. 

Warnings: LOTS of curse words. A lot. 

Words: 4,855

A/N: I am so sorry this took so long. Thank you @secretschuylersister for proof reading for me, and of course my lovely @hamilbye for letting me feature her! So far, this fic (to me) sucks a lot, but let’s try this anyway! I’ll tag the people who asked here too: @robotic-space @daveedsbra @attackonmikaelson @pearltheartist

askbox | masterlist


Morning broke with a harsh light. The weekend beckoned you back to bed with warm hands but the sun that shone insistently through the window was too bright to let you rest peacefully. Feeling, as always, as if you hadn’t slept enough, you trudged down the stairs to arrive to two lovely conclusions: the first being that you had slept all the way till one in the afternoon, and the second being that Nat had too.

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The Signs Opinion On Gossip:
  • Aries: it's god-sip, bc I am in the know of everybody ☕️👀
  • Taurus: people can be so extra
  • Gemini: *spills all the tea* I don't gossip
  • Cancer: it's okay if they're mean tho
  • Leo: I'm not telling any lies, so what's the big deal??
  • Virgo: keep that drama out of my life 🙅‍♂️
  • Libra: I speaketh the truth
  • Scorpio: those lyin' cheatin' fishes deserve what they get imo
  • Sagittarius: if you don't want me gossiping then don't do bad things
  • Capricorn: it's annoying af because people will ruin you
  • Aquarius: gossip is bad when it is used badly
  • Pisces: does fictional people count?
The real deal

What I love even more about John Boyega and Riz Ahmed is that they *are* British or at the least they are in my eyes true Londoners. Like you would come across people here in London that talk like them, dress like them, look like them. If you think people like felicity Jones, Tom hiddleston and benefits cucumber are what majority of people are like here think again.
I love watching interviews of John and Riz and hearing dialects that sound just like mine and I’m majorly proud that they’re POC and are getting the roles they deserve.

          R ED YOU’VE MADE ME GO ON A RANT ABOUT THE VALENTINE’S DAY EPISODE THNK U VMUCH. 

It honestly pisses me off so much that season one had to be written in three months, because there are so many moments that needed SOME SERIOUS fleshing out and that kiss in that episode is a really good example. 

Originally posted by cookiemonster-x3

So this kiss goes on way longer than it really needed too, and i remember watching a webisode where marinette is writing in her diary about her conflicting/non conflicting feelings for chat noir, and i now wonder if it was meant for this episode. Where she kisses him for a moment too long and she pulls away surprised.

Originally posted by disneytwin-a

So wouldn’t she feel guilty after kissing a guy who isn’t Adrien? A guy who pulled her into a whole new world, and obviously the moment they’ve had together in their origins episode shows that. So since she doesn’t know that Chat Noir is Adrien then wouldn’t she feel betrayed by her own heart? She fell in love the moment that thunder struck, and now she’s kissed someone who wasn’t the one she ‘loves’ and she doesn’t seem to hate it. 

When chat asks what happened after the kiss, red said that her explaining what happened was a way of rationalizing it in her own mind. ‘ i had to do it to save him ‘ type of thing. But this is marinette we’re talking about, someone who is ‘ sooooo ’ madly in love with Adrien and yet there’s no time to show her frustration — her self reflection OF WHAT JUST HAPPENED ?????? This is such a big deal for marinette, in fact i bet it haunts her thoughts occasionally and its all just swept under the rug.  I BETTER SEE REFERENCE TO THIS IN SEASON TWO BECAUSE THIS IS TOO BIG TO JUST GLOSS OVER. I’m sure ladybug is gonna bring it up by accident or something, and it really should because this kiss plays a huge role in Marinette/Ladybug’s feelings towards Chat Noir.

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anonymous asked:

K so I'm only 16, and I regularly get freaked out over how much time has passed (if that makes any sense at all). The fact that I'll be done high school next year scares me a lot. Do you have any advice for how I should deal with this? Thanks.

Life is a flow, with you being part of it. Step one is to acknowledge this simple truth. My way to deal with life’s and my constant evolution is to not resist change, but be instead a influencer of change itself. What do you want things to change into? 

Your life can’t stay the way it is, in good and bad - it just isn’t how it works. But this doesn’t necessarily have to feel like a bad thing if you look forward the new experiences and don’t get too nostalgic of the past ones (and yes, if you feel that blame Fi). All the experiences you’ve had, even if things now are changing, are something you’ll aways carry with you. The things you love from your past don’t really ever leave you.  

But the future - the future is what you should have your eyes on. The future can be scary but it’s also where our ambitions lie. Yes, life flows fast. Faster than we think it should, most of the time. But that doesn’t matter. What you should care about is filling the days that are given to you with what you love most in the world - what brings you joy and makes passion spark in you - and I think that in that way fear leaves you at least a bit. 

To put it simply, think about the future, but always - always - remember to enjoy the present.

It’s really lame when people want nothing to do with you when you’re having an episode or are really depressed. It’s like they peek in and see you’re struggling really bad and probably feel annoyed bc how dare I not be there for their joy and convenance and since I’m gonna be in a “mood” why bother trying to talk to me. I used to be the person to respond with “I’m ok” when I wasn’t and it started to annoy me bc why should I lie about something like that but now I’m seeing that some people rather have a huge fucking “IM JUST GRAND” of a lie than deal with my reality and my truth and that makes me feel like shit.

BULLY PT. 2 - YOONGI

Type: angst

A/N: Everyone’s been asking for part 2 and here it is! Writing this was painful so readers be warned: it gets super angsty. It’s also kind of long whoops. Anyway, enjoy!

Part 1

~CONFESS~

That was humiliating, you thought as you slammed the door shut and leaned on it to catch your breath. You ran the entire way home, only stopping when you’d reached the safety of your bedroom. Your heart was racing and you felt so tired. You were physically and emotionally drained.

You collapsed on your bed, feeling the need to cry again but not being able to produce tears. Everything felt so messed up. You were so angry and confused. Why would he kiss you? At first you assumed he was just trying to take advantage of you, but then you remembered the look on his face while you were yelling. What was going through his head?

It wasn’t that late, but you were completely exhausted. The last thing you remembered before falling asleep was the ghost of his hand gripping your wrist, and heat spreading up your arm and through your body. 

~

“Y/N, you have to get up now if you want to get to school on time!” you heard your mom calling. You groaned and dragged yourself out of bed. You were still wearing your clothes from yesterday and your head was pounding. Damn, how long did I sleep for? You wandered into the bathroom and looked at yourself in the mirror.

Suddenly memories of yesterday flooded back to you making you feel nauseous. Yoongi probably already told all of his friends about the kiss, and gossip like that spread like wildfire at your school. You couldn’t take anymore public embarrassment at the hands of Min Yoongi, and you definitely couldn’t face him today.

You threw on some comfy pajamas and walked downstairs to the kitchen. Your mother was busy making some breakfast and getting herself organized for work. 

“Good morning, sunshine,” she said pleasantly as she scooped some food onto a plate for you. She paused when she saw you.

“I don’t feel very well,” you said weakly. “I think I might be sick.”

Her eyes softened and she set the plate on the table. She knew you weren’t telling the truth; she always knew. But she also knew what you put up with at school. She’d tried multiple times to get the school to intervene on the bullying problem, but nothing was ever resolved. She even offered to let you change schools but you knew that would just add extra stress into her life. It wouldn’t be better somewhere else anyway. Kids were mean wherever you went.

“Ok, well if you’re sick I should probably call the school to let them know you’re not coming in today,” she said. You were grateful that she wasn’t making a big deal out of the situation. You walked over to her and gave her a big hug to say thank you, then hurried back to your room.

You spent most of the day curled up in bed and watching TV. You didn’t want to think about Yoongi or what happened, and television was the best way to forget about things.

Your mom left for work shortly after you went back to your room. You spent a lot of days like this, home alone when you should be at school. It was all because of Min Yoongi and his little posse of terrible teenage boys. You wished he didn’t have so much control over your life and how you felt on a day-to-day basis, but it felt like you couldn’t escape from it. You were trapped in the never ending cycle of falling victim to bullying.

It was reaching early afternoon when you heard the doorbell rang. You mother wasn’t home yet and it might have been an important package or something, so you forced yourself to go answer it.

You wrapped yourself in a comfy blanket and hurried downstairs. Not thinking twice about it, you pulled open the door and looked out to see who it was.

You suddenly felt like your heart had dropped to your feet and your headache came pulsing back.

“What do you want?” you spat, staring Yoongi in the eye. Your words had so much venom behind them that even you were surprised.

“I-I uh, wanted to see if you were okay after, uh, yesterday,” he stammered. You glared at him.

“You wanted to see if I was ok,” you repeated. “Are you kidding me?”

“I also thought that I should, um, explain myself.” He looked down. Of course you were curious about what actually happened the day before and what he was thinking at the time; but really you wanted nothing more than to shut the door in his face and go back to watching TV.

“I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you,” he started. “I’m not very good at talking to people, and I wasn’t sure how to get your attention.”

Get my attention? Why would he want to do that?

“The truth is I don’t know how to deal with my feelings, and in this case I really wasn’t sure what the hell I was supposed to do.” His voice was shaky, like he was completely unsure of what he was saying. You wished he would just get on with it.

“I’ve been in love with you for the two years I’ve known you,” he blurted out.

You felt like you’d been kicked in the chest.

What?” you said, completely taken aback. He pushed his hair back from his face, and you saw his cheeks were bright red.

“Yeah. And yesterday I felt like I couldn’t keep it inside anymore. I didn’t know how to tell you, so I just kissed you.”

You stood there, a million thoughts spinning through your head. You couldn’t organize them into tangible ideas. How were you supposed to respond to this new information?

Your silence was obviously making Yoongi uncomfortable. He shifted back and forth between feet and looked like he was also trying to figure out what to say next.

“I was- I was hoping that maybe we could start over,” he said softly. “I feel really bad about how I’ve treated you and I wish I could take it all back. I just want to go back to before I even spoke to you the first time and redo the whole thing.”

You stared at him for a long time.

“You can’t undo everything you did to me,” you spoke coldly.

“I just-”

“The two years that I’ve known you have been the worst two years of my life.” That shook him awake from his fantasy.

“Really?” he whispered weakly.

“You have made my life a living hell, and I will never forgive you Min Yoongi.”

The strangest thing happened next: Yoongi started to cry. He tried to hide it, but you saw his red eyes tearing up. You could see him getting frustrated with himself.

“I don’t know why I ever fell for you!” he shouted. “You’re weird and sad and a coldhearted bitch!” You grit your teeth.

“Yeah, because continuing to insult me is going to benefit either of us,” You spat at him. “You’re pathetic. Now get off my porch.”

You shut the door in his face as he tried to reply with more insults. You leaned against the other side and sank to the floor. He stood there on the porch a little while longer, banging his fist on the door and yelling. You don’t remember when you started crying, but you were a mess by the time Yoongi finally left. 

You didn’t know what your life was gonna be like after this, and whether things would get better or worse. All you knew was you could never be with a bully like Min Yoongi.

Part 3

4

Well today has been a fun day.

After finishing up my finals and dealing with such “lovely” guest at work. I come to find out that I have not only one, but two accounts on Instagram who love my work oh so much that they had to go and steal it.

Tell you the truth. I usually just deal with these things on my own without going to my followers for help and attention, but I’m just so damn pissed! (Could be from the exhaustion of finals and it being the busiest time of year at my Job) 

but...

..Come on! Look how well they both erased me watermarks! If you have time to get THAT detailed to steal someones work, then why not take that wasteful time to actually create YOUR OWN EDIT!

Seriously, are they really getting satisfaction from this!? I understand I am not much of an artist, since I can’t really draw, but I work hard on these colorings! And seeing someone just easily slap their name over mine hurts!  

I am not telling you guys to go and hate on the account or send threats to them. I feel that would just add fuel to the fire really. I just needed to rant truthfully, and maybe just have help reporting them. (Since one refuses to respond to my DM’s from multiple accounts and the other pre blocked me.)  

Thank you if you read this little rant. Let’s hope they just delete the post

5 Harsh Realities of Cosplay

There was an article circulating with what the author called the Realities of Cosplay. And they were in general pretty inaccurate. Y'know like having to be pretty or that it has to cost an arm and a leg.  Those came across as one guy venting his frustration and y'know, whatever. But there are some realities of cosplay that I do think people should be aware of.

Let me start by saying, this is a great hobby. I love it and I think everyone should try it at least once regardless of your age, gender, skin color, body type etc. Cosplay is a hobby about love and if you love what you’re doing then these harsh realities won’t matter much to you.

1. Some of us (cosplayers) can be jerks.

You would think that for a community made up of people that have spent a good chunk of their lives being ostracized we’d be a more unified people. But we, like all social groups, have a few bad apples that are just jerks. They’ll criticize your costume. They’ll exclude you. They’ll gossip and start all manner of drama that you thought you left at High School. We have elitists. We have snobs. We have controlling people. We have gossipers. We have two faced individuals. 

And this isn’t because they’re cosplayers. It’s just who they are as people. And as the Cosplay Community gets bigger, you’re going to see a bigger percentage.. It’s how any social collective is and Cosplay is no exception.

2. The internet can be a cold, cruel place.

Look, I’m a thin white girl. It would be easy for me to tell you to completely disregard skin tone, body type, height, gender, etc and just cosplay who you want. But I won’t. It’s not because I think you shouldn’t because frankly I believe the opposite. It’s because I’m not the one that would have to deal with any resulting consequences. The internet is a dark, cruel place that uses a shield of anonymity to hide behind as people proceed to rip in to you bit by bit. I don’t feel like I have the right to tell you to just endure that anyways. That’s for you to decide.

That said, I’m not going to discourage someone from doing so. I have a friend who is a curvy lady with dark skin wanting to cosplay as Azula. Her idea and I think that’s just awesome. Chick is sassy and I think she could rock Azula. It was her idea. It’s her desire. Some of the internet won’t like that but she doesn’t give a crap. And that’s why she’s awesome. But she’s also very confident. She’s bold. And she doesn’t take any crap from anyone. She’s comfortable with herself and who she is and that’s what really makes the difference here. Whether or not you decide you are there or not is completely up to you.  

The internet has all kinds of crap to sling at you. Make sure you are ready to withstand it. You’ll have people you never met standing behind you to support you but at the end of the day, you’re the one that gets to decide if you want to. And if you don’t, that’s okay too. You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. Confidence is part of the costume too.

3. There’s a good chance someone else has done your costume. And they’ve done it better.

I have this other friend. Wonderful chick. She’s talented. She’s determined. She has a good eye for things. She’ll start on a costume and then look up reference pictures only to see someone has already done it and it’s amazing. And then she gets discouraged and stressed and suddenly it’s a competition. “I will never be as good as ____ in mine.”

Unless you are actually competing, don’t worry about how well someone else has done a costume. Don’t let it discourage you. Don’t let it stress you out. Cosplay isn’t about being the best of that character. It’s about love. Love for the character. Love for what you do. Love for the people you do it for. Don’t worry about that super awesome cosplayer over there. Yeah they’re amazing but even if you think your costume looks like crap now, you still have room to improve. Your last costume was probably better than the one before it.

4. All costumes have a high cost

I’m not just talking money. There’s a saying among cosplay commissioners. Cheap, Fast, or Good. Pick two.  What this means is you will either have to pay extra money, extra time, or sacrifice quality.,

Not all costs are financial. Sure you could make an incredible buster blade with cardboard and paper mache but it’s going to take a lot of time and a lot of skill. Sometimes the cost is not getting any sleep. Sometimes the cost is not getting to wear that costume to the convention because it wasn’t done in time. Sometimes it’s injuries like hot glue burns or cuts from exacto blades. 

And even in a more literal sense. You get what you pay for. If you pay 75 dollars for a Lulu costume from FFX, I can go ahead and tell you: It’s not going to be very accurate. The material is going to suck. It’s probably going to fall apart. The cost there is quality. 

5. Your mental, physical, and financial well being are more important than cosplay.

Let me say that again: Your mental, physical, and financial well being are more important than cosplay. If you are neglecting one of these things, you need to stop, sort that out, and then go back to cosplay. And don’t let cosplay affect any of these.

Don’t bind your chest with Duct tape to get it super flat. Don’t stay up for three days before the con to finish your costume. Don’t spend your rent money on worbla. Be responsible. Be an adult. Look after yourself and if you’re okay then you can go on with the hobby. I’ll often see the phrase ‘Cosplay is life’

NO IT ISN’T

And if that is life for you, back up and try to get things in order. Find some support. Talk to someone you trust. There is no costume…no prize. No convention. Nothing that is worth harming either of those three aspects of your life. You, a human being, are more valuable than any hobby. Take care of yourself first and then deal with any costume things.



Anyways that’s my version of the 5 harsh truths of cosplay. Please understand that I love cosplay and despite these facts, it’s still something I feel is worth doing.

Sam Winchester’s Journal – Entry #99

My friends—well, the few who are still alive—see me as the right person to call when they have to translate a 250 page volume from Enochian, want to find a quick and efficient method to kill creatures as diverse as Wendigos, White Ladies or Werewolves, or in need of some professional advice for summoning demons with minimal risk. That’s who I am, a Man of Letters, the intellectual of the batch, the brains (god, I hate this embarrassing nickname). I had no idea however, I was also perceived as some kind of authority when it came to reasoning with troubled teenagers because of everything I had lived through in my younger years. And, as surprising as it may seem, same goes for Dean, apparently.

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the whole “don’t let the person you like find your tumblr” thing is odd to me because i want the person i like to see this side of me because if they can’t handle this side of me then i don’t want to date them