dead armor

Here’s a sneek peek from the beginning of the Warrior story. You can see her war painting and it’s meaning will be explained in the book. I was always admiring paintings from Carravaggio and Artemisia Gentileschi especially “Judith beheading Holofernes” which was the main inspiration for this piece.

YFIP: Isabela
  • What do you mean you KO’d again
  • I took my eyes off you for two seconds
  • We have like a dozen healing potions and Anders set to healbot what the fuck
  • WHY DID YOU EVEN TAUNT ALL THOSE ENEMIES
  • TAUNTING IS FOR TANKS AND YOU’RE A GLASS CANNON
  • WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE THAT LEVER
  • “Why me? Why is it always me?” I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THAT TOO ISABELA
  • I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THAT TOO
Normal Horoscope:

Aries: Theres nothing worse than being at someone elses house and trying to figure out how to use the shower. The third knob is for wasps. Dont turn that one.

Taurus: Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog, delicious.

Gemini: Turns out love isn’t based off of compassion and personal compatibility, its actually based on how low your coefficient of friction is. Coat your body in Vaseline.

Cancer: People often use their words to express their emotions. Listening can give one valuable insight into a persons emotional state. 

Leo: Steal every book on ancient Egypt you can find.

Virgo: The parts of you that die become your hair and fingernails. You are clad in your own wasting refuse. A knight in dead armor. Carry your fetid banner with pride.

Libra: If paintings of birds of prey start appearing in your home, don’t bring any attention to them. They’re shy.

Scorpio: Yes, be prepared for a first date. Don’t bring your own soup, and don’t try to use the salad fork as a can opener.

Ophiuchus: Nothing makes a friendship like shared intense suffering.

Sagittarius: Aren’t bath robes cozy? They find you cozy too.

Capricorn: Roughly five percent of the ground finches in your area are actually subtle clockwork replicas. They also enjoy bread. Make sure to use wheat, bleached flower isn’t too good for birds.

Aquarius: Strippers are actually communicating with each other in a complex gesture-based language.

Pisces: Steal the fire station just for the dog.

A Crack In Her Armor (Pt.1)

This is part one of a three-parter Negan/oc fic that I had initially intended to be a one shot, but it took on a complete mind of its own! I’m bringing back my oc, Fiona, that I had introduced back in my Simon one shot, “Maneater”. So this should be interesting. Hope y’all get a kick outta Fiona and enjoy this fic as much as I did writing it!


“Shit.” Fiona muttered, cigarette dangling from her lips. Her somewhat jolly mood of acquiring a fresh pack of Marlboro Menthol 100’s, was tainted upon realizing that to get back to her cozy lil duplex, she had to pass by Negans house. Only his side of the street had a sidewalk, the other side was just grass and she was in wedged heels. She cursed herself for choosing aesthetic over practical.

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