daydream rituals

B.A.P Youngjae 'The Things He Wants'

Anonymous asked: When you fall asleep for Youngjae!

A/N: Not gonna lie, I’m a bit rusty at drabbles peeps, for reasons. But hopefully this won’t be too bad until I shake the rust off. ^^

This is a drabble expansion of a reaction I wrote here

It didn’t hit him until you were quiet during one of the funniest parts of the movie that something might be up. You’d been snuggled into his shoulder since the movie started so he’d made a conscious effort not to flail about as much when something amused him. Glancing down he saw your eyelashes resting on your cheeks, face relaxed and showing no emotion. You were asleep.

And on the inside Youngjae squealed like a 12 year old girl getting a pony for her birthday.

His breathing picked up. There was no room in his chest for air because his heart had swollen to fill the whole space. At least that’s what it felt like anyway. His face and ears warmed and he bit his lip to keep quiet. Not wanting to wake you he tried to calm himself and assess the situation.

This was a first for him. Yet something that had been much longed for, even if he would admit it to no one but himself. During long nights away on tour it had practically become a bedtime ritual to daydream before drifting off. Showered and drained from the show, but unable to sleep, he’d lie there thinking about all the things he wanted when he’d finally be able to be in a relationship. And yes, he knew he’d idealized things but that was the romantic in him. He couldn’t help it.

He wanted to spoil someone. He wanted to give flowers and trinkets and ask about their day. He dreamed of being the perfect, charming boyfriend who always looked out for his love and kept them from harm. And in that vein he wanted them to feel safe and comfortable with him. He needed to be trusted. And what could show more trust than letting yourself sleep next to someone? It made Youngjae really feel for the first time that you two were actually together. A couple.

A boyfriend. He was a boyfriend. He knew it was irrational to quantify your relationship by such ambiguous actions. But the grin splitting his face as he peered down at you begged to differ.

His legs started to bounce from excitement and he wanted to get up and run around the room yelling at the top of his voice. Pulling a ‘Dae’ as he called it. But that wouldn’t do. He wanted this moment to stretch as long as possible. His only regret was that his phone was in his back pocket and there was no way he could get to it without disturbing you.

He wanted a keepsake. Something to remember the moment forever. Most importantly he wanted proof to rub in Dae’s face. He knew his best friend was going to be so jealous. He couldn’t wait to tell him even if he got mocked for it. It’d just be proof that Dae was bitter, anyway. And currently didn’t have someone using him as a pillow. No, Himchan didn’t count.

So when the movie he was no longer paying attention to ended he started it again in an attempt to make the moment last. Settling back into the deep couch he gazed at you while you slept, trying to etch your image into his brain for those nights he was gone. Memorizing the slope of your nose, the softness of a cheek, the fullness of your lips. He wanted to spend hours kissing those lips…

Abruptly he realized that chain of thought wasn’t going to do him any favors. So lightly he kissed the top of your head, made himself as comfortable as he could and thought of how to make Daehyun’s life miserable as he gloated over the next few days.