This first one isn’t really funny but I have been asked about it a lot, it is of course the sandwich story:
David and Steve were fighting and Steve said something and swore at David. David then proceeded to grab a tray of sandwiches and launch it at Steve. He felt terrible about it afterwards but Steve had to cancel some of his tour dates because his hand was badly injured.
The second one is a well known one but I will include it anyway:
When Quiet Life was being made the record company gave the band £1000 to get some new clothes for the album cover-shoot. David on the other hand had other ideas and spent the entire £1000 on the red leather jacket you see him wearing on the front cover.
This one is from Mick’s autobiography:
Mick used to share a hotel room with Steve and apparently Steve used to sleepwalk a lot. Mick would get woken up in the middle of the night because Steve was switching the lights on and off and mumbling to himself. Then he would always tangle himself up in the curtains still talking to himself before taking himself back to bed.
This one is also from Mick’s biography:
David and Steve somehow found out where David Bowie lived and knocked on his door one day to see if they could see him. They were politely sent on their way and years later David constantly complained about people doing the same thing to him.
This is one of my personal favourites:
The band were on an airplane and Mick went into the toilet to give himself a horrendous makeover just to make the band laugh. He came out to reveal his ridiculous make up and then the seat belt sign came up and he couldn’t move from his seat. He had to get off the plane at the airport with all of the make up still on.
Another personal favourite:
Mick used to do funny dances for the band before live performances just to calm their nerves and make them feel better before they went on stage. One night the band were on a French TV show performing live and before the curtain went up Mick did his funny dance to make the band laugh. He was still doing it when the curtain went up and the entire audience saw him much to his embarrassment.
This one is literally my favourite:
David was in a supermarket one day just minding his own business, doing the weekly shop no doubt (maybe a bit of Special K in the trolley), when suddenly this woman approached him looking shocked. He was like “Oh no, she knows who I am” but before he could say anything she was like “My God! You are the best David Sylvian lookalike I have ever seen!” and he just played along with a massive grin on his face.
Some childhood stories:
Steve decided that he wanted to join tennis club just so he could stand in the park and chat to his mates unsupervised. Naughty Steve. David and Steve also hated going to school so they would rub and rub their eyes so that their mother would let them stay off with hayfever.
And of course everybody’s favourite:
David and Steve were in their hotel room in their underwear. They heard a knock at the door and assuming that it was someone they were completely comfortable being half naked in front of they just shouted “Come in!”. Suddenly, a load of fans burst in, snapped a load of pictures of them in their underwear and were then escorted away by security. Both David and Steve are now waiting for the pictures to surface on the internet and so is everyone on tumblr.